THE MILK

My First Trimester Diaries Pt. 1 (Weeks 4-8) I Episode 2

• Tayla Burke • Season 1 • Episode 2

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Ladies, this week I'm dropping TWO mini episodes diving into my first trimester, week by week- pfew I'm so glad those days are now just a distant memory. 

The earliest weeks can feel like a secret storm, so I'm opening my personal diary to show the weather. From the moment the test turned positive at four weeks, the symptoms arrived FAST—nausea out of nowhere, insomnia that almost nothing could solve, and a burst of anxiety fueled by dreams of twins (?!) I recall each week with honesty and humor, using those fruit-size milestones for grounding while sharing the small hacks that kept me moving minute by minute.

Nausea kicked in on schedule at week six as we flew to Europe, then stacked with boat motion and jet lag. Hormonal bloat challenged body image, so we reframed: you’ve been here, it peaks and passes. Gentle movement, sun on the face, and getting dressed turned out to be medicine. I also walk through the medical backstory—shortening cervix, one past cerclage, and why I started progesterone early this time. The update is good: solid cervical length, less fear, more data. Mood swings showed up too, including a short burst of pregnancy rage, the kind you laugh about later but are terrified of in the moment...

Food aversions collided with relentless hunger in week seven, making crackers and chips an essential survival mechanism. By week eight, coffee turned into a hard no just as exhaustion peaked, forcing a return to basics: protein, hydration, pacing, and permission to rest (A LOT). The payoff arrived in a dark ultrasound room when we heard the heartbeat and watched a raspberry-sized baby wiggle like a jelly bean. That sound recentered everything, turning symptoms into signs of progress and replacing dread with gratitude.

We’re keeping this mini-series focused—weeks 4-8 now, with weeks 9-13 coming Thursday!—so you can follow the real changes without the fluff. If you’re navigating early pregnancy or supporting someone who is, you’ll find practical tips, candid stories, and the reassurance that even the wildest weeks won’t last forever. If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs it, and drop your questions so I can weave them into the next chapter.

Subscribe now for weekly episodes that remind you you're not alone, you're not crazy, and you're doing way better than you think.

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SPEAKER_00:

Hi ladies, welcome back to The Milk. It still feels so exciting saying that. I know this is only our second episode, but I don't know when that is going to wear off. I was brainstorming how I wanted to kind of start this podcast and just the types of episodes that I wanted. And I thought it would be so fun to take you guys through different parts of my pregnancy since I never really did that too much in the past. And also since hopefully it'll be my last pregnancy, it'll also be a way for me to document and remember everything during our pregnancy because I feel like we get amnesia after it, and I don't even remember things I experienced in Aspen's pregnancy or bashes. So, yes, it's here for you guys to um to hear about and learn about if you have not been pregnant before, if you are, um, to compare and contrast, and then also just for me to just remember and soak up this time in my life. So I'm calling it the first trimester diaries, and I don't know yet if I'm splitting it up into like two or three episodes, we'll see how far I get. But I thought it would be great to take you through week by week of my first trimester, just because that's kind of the most brutal trimester, in my opinion. Some people argue it's the third, but to me it's the first, and there's so many massive changes going on in your body weekly, and it's something I always wanted to remember what happened during what week, how did I feel, what helped. So I thought I would kind of spill all of that for you guys. Okay, so let's start at week four when I found out that I was pregnant. I had been maybe one or two days of missing my period and found out I was pregnant, so it happened at four weeks, and I don't know if it was the shock of finding out that I was pregnant, but after I found out, I immediately felt nauseous, sick to my stomach, and I was like, oh my gosh, there's no way the nausea is hitting me on the day I find out. Usually it would hit me on the day on the dot of week six, and so when I felt this way, I was like, oh gosh, please don't tell me it's already starting. I thought I had a couple weeks left to spare. This also made me so nervous because I was having dreams that I was having twins, and there were multiple people in my life that were like, What if you're having twins? I had a feeling you're having twins, and it kind of made sense because HCG levels are probably double when you're having two babies, which means you get way more sick and get sick early. So I was so terrified. Like, imagine me going from two to four kids. I would actually be deceased. And during this time where we still hadn't had our first ultrasound yet, a friend of ours told us a story of I think it was their cousin that had one baby, and I think it was a boy, and then got pregnant only to find out that they were pregnant with triplets. And I think it was boys too. So they went from one to four, and I was just praying every night on my hands and knees, like, please, God, don't put this on my bingo card of 2025 and 2026. Like, I could not handle that. I only wanted to have one more kid, and that was a stretch. So, anyways, there's only one baby there. Thank God I found out at five and a half-ish weeks, but that was definitely a scare in week four. Anyways, one of the first symptoms that hit me week four was pregnancy insomnia, and it's something I struggled with in every one of my pregnancies, where my body would wake me up in the middle of the night and I would be wide awake, wired, and my body was like a machine where it would not allow me to go back to bed until I snacked on like something salty or chips. And the second it was satisfied with whatever I ate, it's like my eyes just drooped and it was like I completely just turned off and went back to sleep. Um, but I I would notice that when I would be up for three hours in the middle of the night, the next day I just felt 10 times more terrible and I could not get through the day with my two other kids. So in the past, I was really against unisum because I would because I would always feel like I got hit by a bus the next day, and and that was off taking half of a pill, where I think it should be illegal to be recommending one pill um as the dosage. I don't know who can handle that. I probably would not wake up. And so what I did was I would get crafty and like use a knife or like my fingers and and cut a half of a half because there's not a line, and that was like the perfect dose where I would take a quarter a night and it totally helped. And I would feel refreshed the next day. And so I found the sweet spot. So if anyone has taken unison in the past and was like, that is not for me, definitely try a quarter because that did the trick. Also, something I mentioned was it's so crazy in week four that when you find out you're pregnant, your baby is literally just the size of a sesame seed. I don't know if you guys have used the apps, but I just love comparing it and just seeing what's happening in the body and the different type of like fruit or vegetable it is, and then just like what organs it's growing this week and all of that. So I will trickle in some of that information there just because I find it so interesting. Okay, so week five, this was not something that I'd really experienced to this extent in my last pregnancies, but my sense of smell was so heightened. I don't, it was like I had a superpower. I could smell food from a mile away, or if Scotty had something for lunch, I could smell it hours later when he crawled into bed at the end of the day. Like I remember one time he crawled into bed and I was like, Did you have I forget what it was, like so and so? He's like, Yeah, hours ago, or he like picked something up and moved it in the kitchen and came in the room and it wasn't even food. And I smelt it from his fingers. It was so strange. It was a blessing, like it was so cool, but it was also a curse because everything just kind of like gave me the ick and made me nauseous that it was like it just like walking around, smelling everything so strongly, just it it was not it. So that was kind of like the big change of week six, where I just felt like, is it a greyhound? I think it's a greyhound where everything I just felt like I was sniffing everything. And then week six was interesting because it was the day that I left for our Europe trip. And of course, as in the past pregnancies, on the dot is when my nausea kicked in. And so that was not that fun traveling from LA all the way to Barcelona, um, not really sleeping at all. I think I got one or two hours of sleep, but I did make it. And week six is when that hormonal belly bloat kicked in. And it's not even about like how it looked, it was about how it felt. It's like period bloat times 10. I was so uncomfortable that I didn't want to put on a bathing suit, even though I was on a boat and in beautiful beaches, and I was just getting so self-conscious. And I was like, how am I already feeling so gross at two weeks, at six weeks pregnant? Like, I have so much more time. I just felt myself spiraling into feeling self-conscious about myself. But then I caught myself being like, This is your third pregnancy. You've been here before. This bloating is just the hormonal changes of the first few weeks, and that it will pass and you will feel a little better. It's just right now it's peaking. So that definitely helped, just reframing my perspective and being like, You've been here before. Don't beat yourself up. Okay, so this is when the nausea kicked in full force. And it didn't really help that I was on a boat for a week with like the swaying and the movement, where I was like, I don't know which just first trimester nausea and what is me just going back and forth because of this boat. There were so many days that I would have to spend in bed horizontal, and I'd just be laying there closing my eyes, and I would just be swaying with the boat, being like, this is slightly torture. Um, so it was like a double whammy. Um, I laughed, I was like, of course this would happen the week my crazy nausea kicks in. I feel like I am just floating and moving nonstop. The only way I describe it every single time, it's like waking up with the worst hangover of your entire life, but not getting to reap the benefits of enjoying drinks the night before. And also, if someone that struggles with car sickness, like motion sickness, is familiar with that feeling. That's something I struggle with too. It's literally like being car sick nonstop. So even though I was so sick, I really rallied to spend quality time with my family and the kids and also just still be able to explore all the beautiful places we were going to. I was like, I am not letting this morning sickness get me down, even though I'm pregnant. I am going to act like I'm not. And when I'm down bad, I'm gonna let myself rest for a few hours and recharge, and then spend a few hours going to have fun, which really helped. I feel like I would have been really depressed if all I did was bottle myself up inside of the room. I feel like it's good for a little bit of time to like let yourself rest and recharge. But then even if you don't want to, what I found that really helped was still getting up gently, moving my body, getting fresh air. And nine times out of 10, I did feel so much better when doing so. So I think it's always like a healthy balance of like letting yourself rest, but then also giving yourself time to get up, move around, kind of like just feel human again, even putting on clothes and brushing your hair and getting dressed just really did my mind and body some good. One thing that I forgot to mention at week six was this was also the time when I started my progesterone suppositories. And for anyone who's unfamiliar with my story of my last pregnancies, which is probably a handful of you guys, I've talked about it a long time ago, but uh just to revisit it quickly, both of my pregnancies in the past have been high risk because I struggled with a shortening cervix, which their like medical term is cervical incompetence, but I find that quite rude. Like you're telling me that I have an incompetent cervix. So shortening cervix is what I call it, um, which pretty much means it's shortening at an alarming rate, which means your body is kind of preparing for labor. Like that's what happens when the head moves down, your cervix shortens, and then you prepare for birth. So they would with Aspen's pregnancy, they monitored it and then put me on progesterone at 20 weeks to try and prevent it. And it didn't help. So then just before 24 weeks pregnant, I went into the operating room and had my legs literally spread eagle, flashed like big spotlights on me. And there were so many doctors and nurses just working down there for 40 minutes, and um to put it in perspective, they literally sizzle the skin, like the walls of your cervix to cut holes, and they sew your cervix shut to like keep your baby in jail. So we sewed aspen in there. Thank God we did, because the day of my operation, my cervix or my um, I was already one centimeter dilated, which means my body was preparing to give birth at 24 weeks pregnant to her. So she probably would not have survived. So that was a crazy experience. I lost all of my dignity that day. So nothing can faze me. You think that you can hurt me? No, you can't. That hurt way more. Um, and so we with Bash's pregnancy, we started progesterone right away when I got pregnant. Same with this one, and it worked so well. My cervix still was shortening, but not to the point where they felt like they needed to put in a circlage. So it was kind of nice to know that just because I needed a circlage the first time doesn't mean I had to get one the second time, which a lot of people ask me about, and that's what they're nervous about. But for me, that wasn't. So that was really comforting, especially when going into this pregnancy too. So week six is when I started this progesterone, which is a blessing, but it also is the hormone that I'm adding to my body that rises before your period that makes you like moody, cranky, crampy, and just like sad. So the first few weeks has definitely been a hormonal roller coaster where you're just feeling so gross, you're you're crampy, you're sad for no reason. Like I would cry, I was just I was feeling all the feelings. But, anyways, I feel like that only lasted for three or four weeks when starting at six weeks. So I'm out of that now. I'm still taking the progesterone, but based off of my ultrasounds and then measuring my cervix, it is looking really great. I never thought that I would be bragging about my cervical length, but here I am. Um, everything's looking good, so I'm just so grateful for that. Okay, week seven. So this is when the baby is the size of a blueberry. So it's crazy to me that in three weeks it goes from a sesame seed to a blueberry. I know that's not still that big, but that's like a massive jump in three weeks. It just so shows how much is going on in your body during this time that you really don't, you can't even comprehend. So this is this week I was still in Europe. It was actually the week where our families parted ways. So Scott, my half of my family went to a wedding, and Scotty, myself, and the kids decided to go to an island off of Europe. So this meant that the four of us were taking car rides that were hours long. We were on ferries, we were dragging our luggage through this like tiny town to this hotel. We were taking so many different airplanes home all while I was seven weeks pregnant, still on the sick of my morning sickness, which lasted from morning to night. And I look back now, I'm like, how the heck did I do that? Um, I'm honestly so proud and impressed, um, which I usually don't give myself credit for. But I look back and like, dang, when I got home, I was so sick that I don't, I don't, I just genuinely, I don't know if God was watching over me, being like, okay, I'm gonna, I'm gonna help you out for this last week or what. But it all honestly just shows that it's crazy what we can do when we literally have no other choice. And it was just me, Scotty, and the two kids. So, like, if I wasn't feeling good in the morning, Scotty would have to take over. If Scotty was working, I would have to take over. So we definitely proved the strength of our relationship and how we work as a team during these weeks when it mattered most. So, week seven is when my food aversions just completely took a turn. It was so sad because I was in Europe and all the food looked so amazing, and my body wanted nothing to do with seafood. Like I could not look at it, and it was devastating. Scotty was having like the most amazing fish and shrimp and lobster, and there I was just wanting to gag in the corner. And so, but while I had all those food aversions, my hunger kicked in so much that I just had to like shove my face with anything that felt good, and I was I would be eating full meals, and then an hour later, my stomach would be absolutely growling like it hadn't been fed in three days. It was very dramatic. So there were so many things that my body didn't want to eat, but then there were so many things I needed to eat, and I always had to have salty chips on me, literally 24 hours a day. And in Europe, that's kind of hard, like they don't just have random potato chips. So we would have to go on the hunt to find crackers and chips, and people had no idea because it's not like I looked pregnant, they just thought I was like this crazy lady asking for salty chips all day, every day. Okay, and something else that happened this week, which I feel bad about, I'm I feel guilty about, but it was something I hadn't experienced before, but it would but it's pregnancy rage, and I don't know if anyone else experienced that during any of their pregnancies, but I'd always like kind of heard of it, but I I just I don't know, I never experienced it. I experienced postpartum rage, but this week, I kid you not, anything that anyone did just completely bothered me. Like if someone chewed wrong or breathed too loudly, I would see red and steam would be coming out of my ears. I felt so bad. Like I deserve to be locked up in a room isolated because I felt unhinged. And it made me feel really bad, especially for Scotty, because he probably got the short end of that stick, adding on like the stress of traveling. And we had like 18 bags that he was carrying the whole time. So I felt so bad because I'm like, I know this isn't me. Why am I acting like this crazy person? I don't know if it was a progesterone or just like pregnancy rage is a completely normal thing, but I was kind of taken aback by that and felt a little bad, but it passed pretty quickly. Like I'd give it like a week or two, and then I felt like it was gone. Okay, so week eight, we're finally home from Europe. I caught up on the jet lag and everything. This is when everything just got 10 times worse. And I'm sad to report, at week eight, this is when coffee officially made me gag. I felt like I needed it so badly because my full body exhaustion was so real that I could not get my body out of bed. But I also could not stomach or even look at coffee to save my life. So I had nothing to help with my energy besides just like muscling through it, which was so hard. But the light at the end of the tunnel was this was the week where we had our first real ultrasound and got to hear the baby's heartbeat. So even though I was struggling, I just felt so much love and relief for finally getting to hear the heartbeat. I think it never fully feels real until that moment. And I think there's a lot of fear before you hear that. And just hearing the heartbeat, so many of my worries went away. And I was like, you know, I don't care how sick I feel. I don't care how tired I am. Like, I'm doing something so incredible with my body, and these are like the little moments that matter most. And I was so emotional. Thank God it was like a dark room. But um, I started crying when I heard the heartbeat for the first time. And it just, I don't know, it just brought me back. It made me super emotional. And it was definitely one of those core memories, even though it was my third pregnancy, like I've said before, like I'll say this probably every episode where I'm talking about this pregnancy, it just it feels so new for the first time. I also find it so crazy that even though they're only the size of a raspberry at this point, they are still actively moving. You can see on the ultrasound watching them like twitch and make movements, and they're like a little jelly bean, but they're making so many movements, which was just so cool to see at so early on. It's also crazy that their respiratory system is forming during this week already. Like I thought it's happening to something literally this small. So yeah, I think I'm gonna make this a mini episode and keep it to the first five weeks, and then next episode will be weeks nine to thirteen. That feels right, doing five and five to kind of take you through my first trimester diaries. I hope that was fun. Let me know if you have any questions. I think on Spotify you can also leave comments and I can respond that way, or feel free to DM me. Um, hope you love this episode and can't wait for the next one.

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Tayla Burke

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