#53 Crowned & Candid: Bridget O'Brien, Miss Maryland 2024

From a driven competitor who placed as runner-up six times to the confident woman wearing the Miss Maryland crown, Bridget O'Brien's journey exemplifies the power of resilience and authenticity in pageantry and life. Her refreshing candor about the realities of state titleholder life will resonate with anyone who's ever faced rejection or wondered if they're "enough."

Bridget's community service initiative "Boomerang" perfectly encapsulates her philosophy: failure isn't final—it's simply a detour on your journey to success. Using the powerful metaphor of a GPS recalculating rather than telling you to turn around and go home, she's reached over 4,000 students across Maryland with this transformative message. Having traveled 30,000 miles across her state, Bridget prioritized reaching small communities that might otherwise be overlooked, creating meaningful connections that transcended typical "appearances."

What's particularly striking about Bridget's approach is her entrepreneurial mindset toward the role. From sending cold emails and booking her own appearances to securing sponsors and managing relationships, she embraced every aspect of the business side of being Miss Maryland. Her insights on overcoming rejection, building confidence, and learning to say "their loss" when faced with a "no" offer practical wisdom for competitors and professionals alike.

The conversation takes an emotional turn when discussing her Miss America experience, where she reclaimed her power by performing "Don't Rain on My Parade"—the very song that once led to rejection from musical theater programs. Through tears of pride backstage, she embodied what it means to transform failure into triumph. Her advice to want the state title more than the national crown, to build genuine sisterhood connections, and to celebrate others' successes knowing your time will come rings with authenticity and wisdom.

Whether you're competing for a title, facing professional challenges, or simply navigating life's roadblocks, Bridget's story reminds us that our greatest setbacks often prepare us for our most meaningful successes. Listen now to gain perspective on failure, resilience, and the unexpected joy found in detours.

Chapters

• 0:56 Introduction to Sash and Soul
• 2:46 Meet Bridget: From Runner-Up to Miss Maryland
• 7:23 Releasing Pressure and Winning the Crown
• 11:03 Growth Through the Miss Maryland Experience
• 16:58 Behind the Scenes: The Business of Being Miss Maryland
• 28:41 Meaningful Projects and School Tour Impact
• 32:32 Handling Bad Days with Purpose
• 36:33 Navigating Hate and Finding Motivation
• 41:17 Miss America: Preparation and Experience
• 49:42 Emotional Journey and Transition After the Crown
• 57:57 Advice for Future Titleholders

Transcript

Raeanna Johnson: 0:28

Hey you guys, welcome back to Sash and Soul. It is a beautiful day in early June. I know that competition season is well underway. It's been really fun seeing all of the newly crowned title holders throughout the country in Miss USA and Miss America and other pageant systems as well, so just a really super exciting time. For those of you that are listening and maybe new to this show, welcome Thanks for being here.

Raeanna Johnson: 1:00

Sash and Soul is a podcast that really came out of the Fearlessly Authentic Coaching Program, which is my coaching program. That focuses on mindset, community service, communication, leadership skills all of the essential things that you need to succeed in pageantry, in competition, in the job of the title holder. So those are the things that we focus on and really leaning into being your true, authentic self, which is really that buzzword that we keep hearing about. It's just like just be yourself. So if you're in a space right now where you are really in the thick of prepping, you're almost there. You're getting ready to go to your state competition and you're kind of looking for just a little bump in your mindset to get over some comparison, to get over some self-doubt, some fear of failure, fear of success, fear of the unknown, worrying about what other people might think of you or if you're good enough for this job. Fearlessly Authentic is absolutely the place for you, so schedule a consultation with me the link is in the show notes, show description or reach out to me on social media. I would be happy to connect and do just a quick intro conversation with you and see if it'd be a good fit for you and how I can help you reach your dreams and feel your best while we're at it. So that's my little plug for Fearlessly Authentic. But we need to dive in because we have another awesome episode in the Crown and Candid series. This series is something that I put together for all of you so that you get an actual, realistic look at the job, of what it looks like to be a state title holder, and today's guest is so awesome in like encompassing that whole message. Today we have Miss Maryland 2024, bridget O'Brien.

Raeanna Johnson: 2:34

We were talking before hitting record, as I usually do with my guests, just said what's your overall message? What do you want everyone to really take away? And she said her whole brand and her CSI is about overcoming failure, which is awesome. Let's dive in, let's talk about that, because I think that the mindset behind this idea of failure can be really, really paralyzing. So it's going to be a really great conversation to talk about and so timely for all of you.

Raeanna Johnson: 3:00

But she said overcoming failure so that you use those experiences to propel you forward. And we're going to talk about a lot of that, of how she overcome experiences of perceived failure as being part of the runner-up club and really learning from those experiences. And, more than anything, she said she wants any local title holder that's going into state competition to know and embody the idea that you need to want to be the state title holder more than you want to be the national title holder, more than you want to be Miss America, because that's the job and pouring your heart and soul into that is primary and that is how you will succeed as the title holder as well. She says if that's really not your priority, if you're just using it as a stepping stone to get to the next level, you might want to reconsider your priorities and whether or not this space is the right place for you to be. So I'm excited to talk more about that and excited to welcome and introduce Bridget. Thank you so much for being here, hi. Thanks for having me Absolutely.

Bridget O'Brien: 3:59

Would you tell us a little bit about yourself? Yeah, so, like you said in your wonderful intro of me, thank you so much. My name is Bridget O'Brien and I am Miss Maryland 2024.

Bridget O'Brien: 4:11

I am a Marylander through and through, born and raised here in Maryland, in Frederick County, and I have been involved with the Miss America opportunity since I was 16 years old. I competed in the teen program for two years and both years placed second runner up and then I immediately transitioned to Miss my senior year of high school and that was the weird COVID year. So I won a local title and then obviously kept that my first year of college and then finally competed in the state pageant that summer, made top 10. That year came back, made top 10 again and then I got second runner up again. This was in 2023 before I finally took home the title of Miss Maryland in 2024.

Bridget O'Brien: 4:58

Aside from my involvement with the Miss America opportunity, I received my undergraduate degree summa cum laude from the University of Alabama, with a degree in communications focused in news media and sports journalism, and I'm now pursuing my master's degree from the University of Alabama as well, in sports management. Roll Tide I bleed crimson, so I'm loving all of the big bound girlies who are going down there in the fall from the Miss America opportunity. And yeah, I've just been having a blast as Miss Maryland this year and I can't wait to really dive into my experience.

Raeanna Johnson: 5:38

I honestly, I can't wait to hear about it, so let's dive in. I want to know if you had a feeling that this was going to be your year.

Bridget O'Brien: 5:46

So I feel like that's so interesting, because sometimes I thought I had a feeling and then it didn't obviously go my way. So I really wanted to just have fun and I knew that if I had fun and I did my best, then no matter who came home with the crown if it was me or if it was somebody else I'd be proud of myself. I thought to myself, you know, if it was going to be a perfect time, this probably would be it, because I was graduating from my undergraduate degree from the University of Alabama, moving back home to Maryland where I would be stationary. I knew that, you know, the next chapter of my life was kind of a little bit up in the air, and so if there was going to be a perfect time, it would have been this year. But other than that I just was like you know what I'm going to let go and let God and have the, have a blast and have a good time, and that's exactly what I did.

Raeanna Johnson: 6:47

How did you handle, or if you handled, any experiences of like am I doing enough to prepare Cause? When you have that like moment of I'm going to release this, you know and just enjoy this experience, you still have that kind of angst of like, oh my gosh, but what am I forgetting? Did you experience that and how did you handle it?

Bridget O'Brien: 7:05

Yeah, so I think, competing while being a college student in another state. Obviously I competed in the Miss Maryland program every single summer when I came home, but the majority of the year I was living down at school in Alabama, and so I'd I'd travel back and forth and do my best. I was very involved on social media, making sure that I was getting my platform and my CSI message out there, doing as much as I possibly could from school, Obviously, like I was. The time when the week came of Miss Maryland I was like this is going to be fun. I'm not going to put the pressure on myself because I knew when I did that, that's when I kind of crumbled.

Bridget O'Brien: 7:45

So I definitely did feel like gosh, am I doing everything I can? You know, being down here in school, going back home, all the things. But I really trusted in the preparation that I did, practicing my talent and my interview I'd like constantly call my mom and dad they're like my favorite people to do mock interviews with and made sure that I was, you know, doing everything to continue to be able to spread my message while also balancing that life that I had down in Alabama, and so it was kind of hard, but I think that's one of the reasons that I was able to come out with the crown, because I was able to already handle that kind of work-life balance and I knew I'd be able to do that if I were to win the title of Miss Maryland as well.

Raeanna Johnson: 8:35

Life prepares you for this job more than any other targeted preparation that you do for the competition itself. Interview preparation is always helpful, of course, polishing your communication skills, but it's the things that you're doing in life, outside of pageants, that actually prepare you to do the job, and I think that's the essential part, wouldn't you agree?

Bridget O'Brien: 8:58

Oh yeah, 100%. I found that being overly involved in college while also doing all of this and keeping up my grades has been very, very instrumental, because I've already gotten those skills that I needed to kind of amplify myself as Miss Maryland.

Raeanna Johnson: 9:16

You win. Miss Maryland, who were you then? And now, as we're reaching the end of the year, who are you now? How have you changed, gosh, that's such a good question.

Bridget O'Brien: 9:27

So obviously I won Miss Maryland. Freshly graduated from college, kind of everything was up in the air because I was like, well, I don't want to tie myself down to a full-time job and have to move somewhere. And then what if I win Miss Maryland? What if I don't win Miss Maryland? And so there was a lot of unknowns happening. Obviously I was kind of just being thrown back into my home life, moving back home, and obviously you don't know what the job is like until you're kind of in the thick of it and you're doing it yourself. So I was kind of naive to like everything that this job was going to entail.

Bridget O'Brien: 10:07

But now, a year later, I can truly say that I've stayed authentic to myself. I made a promise to myself the day that I won that I was going to do it 110%. I was going to do everything that I possibly could to make this year as Miss Maryland as full as I possibly could. I didn't want to waste any moment. I wanted to make every single appearance that I could perform at every single opportunity. I wanted to make every single appearance that I could perform at every single opportunity and spread my community service initiative above everything else, get in schools, talk to students, make personal connections with every single event that I went to. And now, a year later, I can say that I fulfilled those promises that I made to myself. And so it's really great to look back on the year and, as bittersweet as it is, see that I have, you know, fulfilled those things that I've set out for myself.

Raeanna Johnson: 11:04

You kind of mentioned like the learning curve of like you have an idea of what the job is and then you get into it and you're like, wait, what? So what did you think it was going to look like versus what it actually was?

Bridget O'Brien: 11:15

I think you know, obviously you compete in your state competition every single year and so you kind of know the vibe, because some of us, like me, I go I went back six years in a row, so I knew what to expect um, preparing for that and competing, and then you become the state title holder and it's like okay, so you have to do this job, but you're also preparing for, like, the competition Miss America, and it's in that second year transition and we're all just trying to figure it out as we go right. So from you know, going to New York and designing my own evening gown gosh I didn't even know what that was going to be like because I never did that before. Or going down to Florida and getting my headshots done by Carlos Velez Another thing, like I've I'd never done anything like that before. You know, I'd gotten my headshots from, like, the local sponsors here, but that was just like wow, I felt like a movie star, and so those kinds of things were like really different from anything I'd ever done before, and obviously you don't know until you know.

Bridget O'Brien: 12:18

So that was one aspect. And then I guess for the other half of like actually doing the job of Miss Maryland, every Miss Maryland is different, right? So I had this idea of what I've seen Miss Maryland do in the past six years, and they're not me. And so when I got into the role, I had this idea of what I've seen Miss Maryland do in the past six years, and they're not me. And so when I got into the role, I had to decide okay, what events do I want to do? How do I want to reach out to these different schools? What do I want to do with my school program?

Raeanna Johnson: 12:46

And obviously that's going to be different from the people that came before you Do you feel like your preparation and like your plan of what you ideally want to do and how you'd want to do it was doable once you got into the job, or did you have to kind of pivot in any way?

Bridget O'Brien: 13:02

So I definitely would say it was doable. But I did have to pivot because when I got into the role, I didn't have connections with all the schools in the state of Maryland or all of the events that I wanted to do, and so I had to figure out, you know, who do I know here and there that can connect me to somebody. Or I literally wrote so many cold emails and did so many cold calls this year because I had to make those connections somehow that I didn't already have them. And so, yes, the goals that I set were attainable, but I had to figure out a way to make it work, if that makes sense.

Raeanna Johnson: 13:46

Yeah, it totally makes sense, because you don't really know what hurdles you're gonna have to jump over and who else you're gonna have to climb through until you're in it.

Raeanna Johnson: 13:55

Yeah, and I think that's a part of why you become a, not a different, person. I feel like that's a little dramatic, but like that's why you grow so much. It's because you are faced with all of these challenges that you didn't expect to face or know like. You expect challenges but you don't know what those challenges are going to look like. So how can you prepare? And I just the the coaching call that I was on right before this. One of the things we were kind of talking about was money mindset and the fear of the financial strain that you might have as a state title holder, and I was like you just can't solve all the problems that don't exist yet.

Raeanna Johnson: 14:34

Right, and so to some extent, you have to go in blind and you have to go in with this blind faith that you'll figure it out and that you're resourceful.

Bridget O'Brien: 14:42

Yeah, I definitely. I can completely relate to that kind of like I don't know like what all this is going to look like for me and my family financially. And then we got in there and it's one of those things where it's just like you have to kind of roll with the punches and obviously, like we were able to figure it out with help. You know, everything takes help, and so even things from like every single piece of wardrobe that I wore at Miss America aside from my competition wardrobe I got secondhand I bought from literally TJ Maxx, marshalls, homegoods, like all of the things that I was doing, like we budgeted, we did it on a budget and it's I think that's something people don't know or see. It's like oh well, I'm going to be Miss X state. I need to have a custom, every single outfit or the most designer, this, that or the other. Like no, truly, I borrowed half of my clothes from people. I got them hand-me-down.

Bridget O'Brien: 15:47

Facebook Marketplace is my best friend. I always get stuff off of there. Bargain hunting is like my family's favorite thing. My sister is like the queen of it, and so that's the other thing I always tell the girls here in Maryland is like y'all do not have to be walking the Met Gala runway. You just have to, you know, be confident in what you're wearing, and that doesn't mean that it has to be the most expensive thing on the rack.

Raeanna Johnson: 16:17

Completely Absolutely. So earlier you mentioned that you you know, you recognize that you weren't the same Miss Maryland as Miss Maryland's before you. You're a different person. You've got different goals, different, different dreams. So, as we're talking about kind of the business side, you had mentioned trying to plan out what kind of appearances you wanted to do what did that look like for you? What was the business side of things for you in Maryland? Like how involved were you in the professional aspects of booking your appearances and securing those things?

Bridget O'Brien: 16:49

Right. So I am doing it all. I book my appearances, I schedule with the people that you know, run the event that I'll be attending and I figure out my travel and all of that kind of things. The administrative stuff, like my Miss Maryland email, is like my child. I have, like a, crafted and curated that over the past year, my Google calendar, same thing, and so for me it was really interesting because I was able to. You know, if I wanted to do an event, I could do it. I just had to find a way to make it happen and I think that made me so strong in who I am and making sure that I can sell myself and I tell the girls like you know you better than anybody else, you know why this event should have you there. Be confident in that, be confident in who you are and why you should be there.

Bridget O'Brien: 17:46

Just a few examples would be when I was first getting into going to school. So I have a school program with my community service initiative called Boomerang and it's about bouncing back and bouncing forward from your failures to your future success, and so I had to market that to different schools and you know, once you get into one school and they like what you have to say. You know they're gonna tell other schools. You know, hey, like I had Miss Maryland in my classroom today and she was awesome, and so once I got my foot in the door there, things just started rolling. And then kind of a more fun appearance that I did was I performed at Olympic medalist Aaron Brooks homecoming celebration. So Aaron Brooks is an Olympic bronze medalist wrestler from Hagerstown, maryland, and that's actually where we have the Miss Maryland competition every single year. And I saw a ad for it on Facebook and I thought to myself, wow, I mean, that would be such a cool experience to go meet an Olympian and my talent is singing, so I would always use my talent as kind of a way to put my name in the ring.

Bridget O'Brien: 18:54

And so I just reached out to the people who were organizing the event and I offered to sing God Bless America before the mayor gave him the key to the city and they said of course, we'd love to have you there. I got to meet him and then through that I was able to secure different events in that same town because they loved what I had, and I've seen that happen so many times this year, just by fostering the relationships from different events. Simple things like a thank you note, handwritten thank you note, a follow-up email those things go a super long way because if they have another event and they're like gosh, I need an MC or I need a performer oh wait, I remember Miss Marilyn. She was awesome. Let me just reach back out to her again. So having those kind of little connections have been super, super helpful for me this year as well.

Raeanna Johnson: 19:46

It is amazing how much pageantry is selling yourself, in a sense, a hundred percent. The things that you're describing right now is everything to do with sales. You know, like the networking, the follow-up, what you said earlier about like, you know better than anyone why you should be at that event, why you would be valuable for that event. That starts in the competition. That's that's why we are incredible at interview, because anytime you're interviewing for a job or anything else, you're trying to sell yourself, you're trying to sell your value, and you do that all year as a title holder too, in order to get the most out of your year. So I think that is such an incredible skill that we underestimate about ourselves. And I think having that confidence to go out there and be like, nope, I'm valuable, I know why that I'm valuable, and then also being comfortable in the spaces when you're told no and not taking it personally how did you handle no's?

Bridget O'Brien: 20:47

Oh my gosh, I've gotten so many. Either it's just like they don't answer me or they say, you know, we don't really have space for that, or whatever. And it's one of those things where you just take it on the chin, take it with a grain of salt and you're like okay, got it, move on to the next one. Let me go send another cold email and figure it out. And sometimes it's even I would email about an event and I always, like I said, I would always pitch myself as a vocalist. You know, if you need a national anthem singer, here I am. If you need a performer, here I am. And sometimes it was even just a simple hey, we don't actually need any entertainment, but we'd still love to have you at the event. Totally fine, I would just be like you know what? That's cool, I will be there and I will be there with a smile and make it a great event and connect with as many people as I possibly could. So to always try to find kind of the positive that came out of it.

Raeanna Johnson: 21:42

Yeah, I love that. What? What was it like handling sponsors or bringing on donors or maintaining donor relationships? Yeah, yeah.

Bridget O'Brien: 21:53

So I think the first thing is always my family has always taught me that handwritten cards go a very, very long way, and so that's one thing that we prioritize during the Miss Maryland competition and able to foster those relationships and make sure that they continue year after year for every single girl who competes. And then also, as well, bringing on new sponsors. I was able to bring on F45 as a sponsor. I just was at an F45 class before I happened on this call and it was something that I had started going to workout classes with my friends and realized that I loved it and I'd love to bring them on. You know, via that, you know Miss America Fit initiative that we have and being able to go and utilize that space and becoming friends with the people who work there, who manage the business, being a friendly face, giving 110% at every single class, I was able to pitch myself and the Miss Maryland organization to them and they were able to sponsor me for my entire year with workouts. And so I'm going to be very, very sad when that is over, when I am no longer Miss Maryland, but I will be continuing to go because I believe in the mission and the brand and that's something that's really important.

Bridget O'Brien: 23:19

And then in the donor aspect so actually at the Miss America competition I was recognized and awarded for my fundraising and leadership efforts through the American Heart Association and I was able to raise over $6,000 to the American Heart Association and was awarded their Go Red for Women Leadership Regional Award.

Bridget O'Brien: 23:43

And I was able to raise that much money because I went out to those local businesses. I hosted different restaurant nights, I hosted a dance class at a local dance studio, I went out to different business owners that I knew in my neighborhood and told them who I was, what I was raising money for and that this was a tax-deductible donation that they would be able to give. And once I was able to connect with those people and make those personal connections, that's when people started donating large sums. That's when people started donating large sums and then even just asking friends and family. I was able to garner those donations as well. And then I always followed up with either a thank you note, a handwritten thank you note, an autograph card or an email to those people as well. So it's always, you know, pitching yourself but then thanking those people for what they do so that they can feel you can feel valued and appreciated because they are, and that will help them come back year after year.

Raeanna Johnson: 24:43

You sound so confident and self-assured when you're talking about some of these steps that you took to book appearances, to fundraise for American Heart Association, to bring on sponsors. But sometimes that is the most anxiety-inducing piece of the job. Do you ever struggle with that anxiety?

Bridget O'Brien: 25:06

Oh yeah, Okay, 100%. At the beginning, when I was a freshly crowned Miss Maryland, I would always get so, so nervous to hit send on an email, because what if they say no to me? You know, and it was kind of going back to what we said of like, how do you handle those no's? And I think it's after realizing, okay, it's not the end of the world If someone says no to you, and kind of figuring out how to navigate that. That's when I found this confidence of like all right, I'm just going to send the email because the worst thing that someone can do is say no, right, and then it's like no skin off my back.

Bridget O'Brien: 25:39

And usually if they say yes, then it's a win-win for everybody in those situations. And so, yes, the anxiety is there and it was very, very prevalent at the very beginning. Then, after you know, you get into the groove of it. You're like what I said before, I know me better than anybody else, so if they say no, it's their loss. You know, one of those kind of that kind of mindset that I've given myself this year.

Raeanna Johnson: 26:04

Yeah, I think it's just like with anything that you're afraid of or nervous about. You know they say practice makes perfect, but I think it's more so that with practice and with action comes comfort, comes ease. Practice and with action comes comfort, comes ease, comes like this. I don't know this lightness to it that you know every time that you hit send and the world didn't end you grew a little bit more comfortable in doing it.

Bridget O'Brien: 26:32

Yeah, and I've seen it even translate to my personal life as well Applying for jobs, looking for those next steps, post Miss Maryland, and I've received a lot of rejections and a lot of no's and a lot of just never got a reply, never even got an interview, and in my mind I'm like gosh. I mean, I know I can do these jobs because I'm doing literally everything right now, but it's their loss that they didn't want to take a chance on me, and so that when that clicks and someone you know goes out of their way and it's like, yeah, like let's give her an interview. I know that I'm able to, you know, show up and show them who I am and what I bring to the table.

Raeanna Johnson: 27:16

Yeah, no doesn't necessarily mean never it sometimes just means not now, not right now.

Raeanna Johnson: 27:24

Yeah, yeah, oh, good stuff. Really, this is one of the most anxiety-inducing things. Is the fundraising, is the asking for sponsors, is the putting yourself out there, because rejection is hard, it's so hard and it's so scary, but it's not the end of the world. What were some of your most meaningful projects? I mean, you mentioned in the beginning that, like all the things that you set out to do this year as Miss Maryland, you felt like you have accomplished and you feel really satisfied with everything that you put in. So what were some of the most meaningful projects or appearances, or even the partnerships that you developed throughout the year?

Bridget O'Brien: 28:03

So I think, first and foremost, the most meaningful thing that I've done this year is my school tour with my Boomerang workshop. I've been able to speak with over 4,000 students ranging in age from 7 to 24. And being able to see my message implemented across grade level, across age level, has been so special. And what Boomerang is all about is realizing that failure isn't final. That, like you said, no doesn't mean never. It just might mean not right now, and so you have to learn from those experiences and grow from that and figure out how you can utilize those as a catalyst for success.

Bridget O'Brien: 28:47

And so I always talk about it like it's a road trip. Our lives are like a road trip, and when there's a road closure or a roadblock, our GPS is never gonna tell us to turn around and go home. They're gonna give us a new route to get there, and so that's really what our experiences and our lives are all about. When you face a failure or you face a setback, that's not something telling you to turn around, quit, go home, stop. It's just saying, hey, you need to find a detour, you need to learn from this and you need to find a way around it, and that's what I've done with my entire life, both competing with the Miss America opportunity and then also through my personal life as well, and I get to share those stories with students and being able to see it kind of click with them and their mindset change whether that be a first grader or a senior in high school or even a college student has been so, so special to me and I've had a lot of really great interactions with students that have will hold special, a special place in my heart forever. So that's the first thing that has been super special to me.

Bridget O'Brien: 29:56

And then I think another more fun thing was that I wanted to travel across the state and I wanted to go in those little nooks and crannies of Maryland that you know, you might not really even know exist.

Bridget O'Brien: 30:09

And I've been able to travel over 30,000 miles across the state, all the way from the most northern western point in Garrett County to the most southern eastern point in Crisfield, maryland, and being able to connect with those different people and then go back there and see familiar faces and then recognize me and look at me as a friend.

Bridget O'Brien: 30:30

I went to Crisfield, maryland, which is on the eastern shore. It's the most southern eastern shore in the most southern county in Maryland and I was able to go there about a month after I was crowned Miss Maryland and stayed there for a week, did a ton of different really cool appearances. And then I got to go back in Christmas time and I was in a parade and there were so many people lining the streets who knew who I was because of back in the summer when I visited, and they just saw me as a friend. So I got to go to a local restaurant after and hang out with some of the people that I had met and those little moments were so, so special to me because I wanted to make the most of my year as Miss Marilyn and touch as many people's lives as I could.

Raeanna Johnson: 31:15

You, oh man, you're so brilliant at, I wanna say, storytelling. It's not, it's you just like sharing your experiences that you had. But you're so brilliant at it. And I say that because, like, you're just sparking like all of these like visions in my head, my memories of like when I was traveling and the experiences that I had on, like my school tour and all that like and how special that was. And the experiences that I had on, like my school tour and all that like and how special that was. In the way that you talk, you're just so genuinely passionate about it. Did you have bad days where you struggled to be as present as on, as passionate as you are right now, in this moment with me?

Bridget O'Brien: 31:54

Yes, a%, like there were definitely really hard days where I felt like the world was crumbling and around me and I didn't know what to do. And, honestly, the things that got me through those were A my support system, my family, my mom, my dad, my twin sister and my friends and be the fact that I knew that I could change someone's life with an interaction. And if I would let those bad days get to me then I wouldn't have the opportunity to do that. And so there were days where I knew I had to go to an appearance but I wasn't really feeling it and I knew that if I didn't give 110% then maybe I wouldn't be inspiring somebody as much as I could have. And so I always not that I like brushed it off or I put it to the side, I let myself feel those feelings. But when I got to that appearance I knew, you know, I could touch someone's life that day and I kind of let all of those things go away and majority of the times I would come out of those appearances feeling so fulfilled, feeling so joyful. I went to the Ronald McDonald house here in Bolts for and I did a craft hour with them and we made our own crowns. And I remember, earlier in the day I was, I was feeling a little bit, you know, down on myself.

Bridget O'Brien: 33:16

Comparison is the thief of joy, but that doesn't mean that we don't feel it all the time. You know, we tell ourselves, you know we can't compare ourselves to each other or whatever. And so, you know, leading up to Miss America, I'm sure you felt this way. It's a constant like, oh my gosh, like she's prettier than me, or what if I'm not doing as much as her, or she has this and that and I don't. And so sometimes, like I'd wake up in the morning and be like, oh, like I'm never, like it's never going to be it for me, like I'm not, I'm not, I'm not good enough.

Bridget O'Brien: 33:48

And so it was just one of those days and I was like, okay, like I have this appearance at the Ronald McDonald house, me and my mom. We got in the car, we went to the appearance and, oh my gosh, we left that appearance like crying tears of joy because we had so much fun. And that was something else. That was really special is I got to share these experiences with my mom, who's been there with me since day one, and so she's kind of felt all the feelings that I've felt, and so I walked into that appearance and I knew, okay, I'm going to let everything go and I'm just going to be present in the moment and, oh my goodness, it was one of the best days of my life. So, yes, I definitely felt those times where I, like, was having a bad day and it just wasn't going my way, but a lot of the times I'd come out of those things feeling better than I went into them.

Raeanna Johnson: 34:34

Sometimes, distraction can be the best medicine.

Bridget O'Brien: 34:41

And also it those doubts from myself, you know, not feeling pretty enough or good enough or doing whatever. You'd go to those appearances and you'll have kids and they are like you are the best thing since sliced bread, like you are a real princess to them. And in those moments you're like wow, like why am I comparing myself to somebody else when I am just being myself? And these little girls they want to, they want to be like me when they grow up. Like wow, and that just really puts it into perspective and that just really puts it into perspective.

Raeanna Johnson: 35:21

Yeah, it really does. Appearances like that can be some of the most fulfilling and refueling when you're in those, yeah, and those moments where you just feel so depleted and broken, like it's appearances like that that actually fuel you and I think, like, isn't that like some of the addiction of pageantry and being a title holder?

Bridget O'Brien: 35:39

Yeah, you're 100% correct. It's like how many times are you going to go out in public or whatever, and someone's going to just come up to you and be like, oh my gosh, you are so beautiful. Or oh my gosh, miss Marilyn, like you are so cool, like I think about it all the time, like I'm walking on the street by myself and like I don't have the crown and sash on and everyone's just kind of going about their day. But like you put the crown on and then everyone's like, oh my goodness, like you're awesome and wow, I just feel so good about myself.

Raeanna Johnson: 36:13

It's powerful and that's I mean, that's that's what you want other people to experience too, right Like. That's why we want everyone to to join the Miss America opportunity, to do a pageant, to like to put themselves out there so that they can feel that too. We just want to like spread the joy because it can be so wonderful. And then there's haters. Let's flip to the other side of things. Did you ever experience any hate throughout your year?

Bridget O'Brien: 36:38

I did. I did so. I was very, it was very interesting because when I was crowned Miss Maryland, it was, I want to say, maybe a week or two weeks after the Miss Maryland USA competition, and the woman who won Miss Maryland USA this year was the first ever transgender women to win the title of Miss Maryland USA. And you know, people online don't? They don't know there's a difference between Miss America and Miss USA, and so she was receiving a lot of backlash and my heart, my heart, was breaking for her because I was watching that on social media before the Miss Maryland competition and it just it broke my heart because obviously this woman worked so hard to get there and then to be feeling all of those emotions and that hate was very, very devastating and heartbreaking for me. And then I won Miss Maryland and that hate translated onto my social media because people didn't know who I was and they didn't know the difference and they were just ignorant to that and they're already being horrible people for hating on someone and then they're just kind of like spreading that hate to whoever kind of pops up on their feed, which was crazy to me. And so I had to kind of navigate that and I was like asked about it on a radio interview about like all the controversy, and I just kind of was like well, that's kind of not, yeah, like we don't. We don't hate here, obviously, like there's no butting heads between organizations, like at least not for me. Like I'm kind of like everyone's yes, miss Maryland, sister, okay. But yeah, like I just thought it was very interesting that people just kind of felt like they could say whatever they wanted, and that's clearly people love to hide behind their screens, um.

Bridget O'Brien: 38:43

And then on the flip side of that um, after I won, I I felt some hate from like within not within myself, but like within the group of people that I competed with. Um, there were some people that did not obviously want me to be the next Miss Maryland, and that was really sad, because I am one of those people who's like happy for everyone. I've watched so many girls get crowned Miss Maryland before I did and I always knew and I say this every time I go to a school appearance or anywhere I'm like success is found when you celebrate others, because one day you're going to be the one that wants to be celebrated and so you need to celebrate others in order to receive that back. Treat others the way you want to be treated. So it was really disheartening to see these girls that I stood on stage with.

Bridget O'Brien: 39:38

I mean, it wasn't everybody. I don't want to like generalize that, you know there's always just like maybe one or two people who just weren't very happy and that was really sad to see. But I knew it gave me motivation to prove them wrong that they were saying you know I wasn't going to be a good Miss Marilyn, while I was going to prove to them that I was. And in that respect, you know, I'm feeling fulfilled that I was able to please myself and make sure that I fulfilled my goals. But also I feel like I was able to prove the haters wrong with that one too, I love that, because what I love most about what you just said was I fulfilled my goals.

Raeanna Johnson: 40:18

Like number one priority, it should never be about proving someone else wrong. Uh, I think that that can be really powerful motivation, but I don't think it's the healthiest, I don't think it's the most powerful. The most powerful motivation truly comes from your own. Why, yeah, how did? Okay, well, let's talk about nationals. I want to talk about Miss America. Yeah, what was your prep like for Miss America versus for Miss Maryland?

Bridget O'Brien: 40:49

It was definitely a lot more intense because, right, you have a little bit more of a condensed period of time to figure it out and, honestly, though, the main thing that I wanted to do was the job, and so I packed my schedule with things speaking, engagement, school appearances, performances, emceeing events, just like anything to prepare myself for what it would be like if I were to be crowned the next Miss America, and also prepare myself if I wasn't to be crowned the next Miss America, because it doesn't serve you to sit in a little hole of just prepping for Miss America, practicing your walks, practicing your interview, practicing your talent and not getting out in your community and being your state title holder, being a state title holder and doing your job as the state title holder.

Bridget O'Brien: 41:47

I feel like that was the most preparation that I could do, because I was talking to different people all the time. Like I just said, like I got that kind of weird question in a radio interview and, gosh, I had to figure out how to answer it because I was on live radio. So I knew that if I got a question in the Miss America interview that I wasn't prepared for or was kind of out of left field, well, I knew I could do it because I've already done it. So all of those things preparing for everything by doing it actually in real life was the most helpful thing for me.

Raeanna Johnson: 42:21

What were some of the biggest lessons that you learned, or maybe even like unexpected challenges that you had competing at Miss America?

Bridget O'Brien: 42:31

The first one, through actually competing at Miss America, is that the experience is so much more than what you do on stage. Yes, I gosh, I walked off stage at Miss America and I felt like a million bucks and that's how you should feel, right, you're at Miss America, so you should walk off stage and feel so proud of yourself. And but it's the moments that happen kind of behind the scenes. Those are kind of the ones that create the most memorable things and that's through the friendships that you make.

Bridget O'Brien: 43:06

If you go to Miss America and your only goal is like tunnel vision, crown, evening gown award, preliminary talent award, stage competition, stage competition, stage competition you are missing the experience. That is sitting right in front of you on a silver platter and I made so many great memories. I made so many great friends that will be my friends for the rest of my life. That's the real prize for me is that I left a having had a great experience, like being proud of myself and what I put on the stage, but be having came home with friends and memories that I will literally be friends with for the rest of my life. So that's like the first thing that I tell everybody is like you can't have that tunnel vision of just the competition, because you're going to miss the really really cool once in a lifetime experience that you have really cool, once in a lifetime experience that you have.

Bridget O'Brien: 44:06

What was the emotional build-up to miss america? Like, oh my gosh, crazy. I feel like as somebody who grew up watching miss america, um, wanting to be on that stage. It's a lot of like amped up energy, like I'm so excited to be here but oh my gosh, I'm so nervous because like this is it as somebody who competed for six years in the state competition and then it's like you got one chance at Miss America. There's no re-competing there. That's a little bit scary, actually, it's really scary.

Bridget O'Brien: 44:39

And so it's feeling all of the feeling at once. But then it's so important have your people there, bring you back down to earth, be like, hey, girl, you know, it's okay if you don't win, it's okay if you don't make top 10. We are so proud of you, you're doing such a great job. And then also having those friends that you make there standing backstage with you, being like, girl, you just killed that and who cares what happens at the end of the day, like you're on the Miss America stage and I always say like I'm friends with Miss America. I think that that's pretty cool in and of itself. So all of those amped up emotions. But then having those people around you to, kind of like, bring you back down to earth is so important.

Raeanna Johnson: 45:21

Ground you and to anchor you. Bring you back down to earth is so important. Ground you and to anchor you.

Bridget O'Brien: 45:29

What was the aftermath like for you? What was the letdown after? Nationals like, yeah, so obviously like I worked my butt off to go to Miss America and to do my best and hopefully make the finals and win, and obviously that's not the outcome that happened for me. But at the end of the day I realized that if it was different judges on a different day or whatever that might be, you know, it could have been a different outcome. And going back to something that we said earlier, it's like I was proud of myself. Going back to something that we said earlier, I was proud of myself. I got off stage from performing my talent and I sat in the dressing room and I just sobbed because I was so proud of myself.

Bridget O'Brien: 46:12

A little backstory to my talent I performed Don't Rain on my Parade as my talent vocal selection and I've been in musical theater my whole life. When I went to the University of Alabama, I wanted to pursue that as my career and my major and I auditioned for the program at the University of Alabama with the song Don't Rain on my Parade and I got rejected and I didn't get in. And I and I re auditioned the year after and I didn't get in again and I was told that my voice was too raspy and I wasn't good enough and that there were just people that were better than me. And that crushed me Because it was something that I love to do. And so when I went to Miss America, I knew I wanted to take the power back from that failure and that rejection and I sang Don't Rain on my Parade and I also sang that at my state competition as well and I just I walked off stage from singing and I had never done it, that.

Bridget O'Brien: 47:11

I'd never done it like that before. I'd never had the feeling of walking off stage and being like, oh my gosh. I nailed that I felt so proud of myself and I just sat in the dressing room and I just cried because I was so proud of myself and so feeling that sense of pride and accomplishment within myself helped me in the face of defeat and rejection. When it came to that final night of competition and I didn't hear my name called into the top 10 and then coming home and kind of sitting with like oh gosh, now I'm not preparing for anything anymore, I'm just being Miss Maryland. But I knew that I was. I was proud of what I put on the stage, and so I was able to, you know, give a full effort to the job now.

Raeanna Johnson: 48:03

Yeah, it's really nice to come back without any real regrets.

Bridget O'Brien: 48:10

Right, like I didn't regret anything that I did or anything that I well, during competition I was just like all right, like it wasn't my day and that's okay. God had a different plan for me.

Raeanna Johnson: 48:24

Yeah, there's cause I came back with regrets and I had like a huge letdown and there's like powerlessness in that. And it's such a yucky feeling and it takes away then from the experience of what you have right in front of you. So yeah, that I'd love that perspective of taking in everything, going in without the tunnel vision and just kind of taking everything in stride.

Bridget O'Brien: 48:49

Right, and I'm not saying that I didn't come home disappointed. I went back to the hotel that my parents and my family were staying at the night of finals and I literally cried all night Like I was. It was obviously a feeling of pent up emotions and like lack of sleep and just like being in the competition atmosphere for an entire week, with the fact that the dream that I had dreamed my entire life was over and now I have to find a new dream, right? So you're mourning the loss of that dream and I was disappointed because obviously I was so proud of myself and I was like I couldn't have done anything better. What do you mean? I wasn't good enough.

Bridget O'Brien: 49:33

So, like, it's totally okay to take that time and be upset and mourn that loss of you know, that dream, but always look forward. Don't spend all of the time looking at what could have been. Like, oh gosh, what if I? What if I would have won? Or what if I would have made the top 10? Like, if I spent my whole entire life thinking about that, gosh, I wouldn't have done half the things that I've done in the last six months of being Miss Marilyn. So how?

Raeanna Johnson: 49:59

how did this entire experience doing the job going to Miss America, the growth that you've experienced, how have you been stretched emotionally, mentally and spiritually this year?

Bridget O'Brien: 50:14

Very candidly, I feel like I've been stretched very thin because it's a lot right, you're in this once-in-a-lifetime job for one year and you want to give it your all, and so for me, I'm like gosh, I need to do everything and I wanted to do that and I've loved doing that.

Bridget O'Brien: 50:33

But there are days where I'm like I am so tired I need to sleep for multiple hours, like for all day, or days where I just cry because it's just I haven't slept or I am tired and have so much to do.

Bridget O'Brien: 50:50

I went to the beach over Memorial Day weekend with six of the other girls who compete at Miss America with me so six other state title holders and I got into the car after a really long day of traveling back home in Maryland and I sobbed all the way home because I was just like I can't believe this experience is kind of coming to an end and I'm like on the home stretch and I've done so much and I'm so proud of that and there's just been so much going on. So some days it feels like I know everything and some days it feels like I know nothing at all, and some days I feel like I'm giving 110% and some days I feel like I can give more and I don't regret anything that I've done, though I am like so proud of everything and I would do it again. That's the thing is like no matter what, like I would do it all over to have had this experience. So in my mind, I'm like it's only a year so I can do it and I'm going.

Raeanna Johnson: 51:57

Yeah, but now it is coming to an end, right? What are you feeling?

Bridget O'Brien: 52:01

Right, and I feel like so many people ask me, like they'll come up to me. Either it was at orientation or at an event. Well, how do you feel? How do you feel? I don't even know how I feel.

Bridget O'Brien: 52:15

It's definitely bittersweet because it's like I have done so much and like I am, you know, tired and ready to you know, be Bridget, but I'm also not because it's again something that I've wanted for so long. And going back to something that we said at the beginning is like when every local title holder, like you need to want this job so bad, you need to want to be your state title so, so bad and give it your 110% effort so that by the end of the year, you're like gosh, I want to hold on forever. But also like I've literally done so much, like my, like I don't know if I can take much more. Do you know what I mean? It's like one of those like it's kind of like a hard dichotomy between the two, because I've wanted it so bad for so long and I've done the job and I've had a blast doing it. But I'm also like I'm ready to see what the next phase of my life looks like and I'm so excited for that too.

Raeanna Johnson: 53:16

Do you know what the next phase of your life looks like? And this is the dreaded question. I feel like everyone gets this when you're getting to the end. Everyone's asking you what's next, what's next, what's next, and it's like ugh, like enough. Do you, do you know?

Bridget O'Brien: 53:28

Yeah. So, um, right after Miss America, I started applying to different jobs because I was like, all right, might as well just get a kickstart on this now. Um, nothing was really clicking for me. I'm going to school for sports management, so I'm finishing up my master's. I should be on track to graduate by next May, which is really exciting for me, so at least I know that I'll be getting my master's degree. I'll be getting my graduate degree, um, either by next May or by the fall.

Bridget O'Brien: 53:57

And I, so I was applying for all these jobs and nothing was really clicking. I'd get interviews here and there, but nothing was really, you know, working for me. And I was kind of feeling a little bit lost because and I'm sure you can relate to this as the state title holder you gain so many skills Like you're, like I can literally do any job, because I am basically doing every single job all at once. I'm being a public figure, I am booking appearances, I'm being a salesperson, a marketing person, pr, social media, content creator. Like I literally feel like I wear a thousand hats and I feel like that makes me so uniquely qualified for literally every single position I've applied for. But it's like people don't get that, and then they don't give you an interview that gives you the opportunity to share, like hey, listen, I've been around the block this year, like I know what it's like, so that was a little bit frustrating. But then it only takes one person to take a chance on you.

Bridget O'Brien: 54:57

And so I had someone reach out to me about a position that opened up at a public affairs firm in DC, on Capitol Hill, and they were like hey, like I'm going to send your, your resume to this company.

Bridget O'Brien: 55:12

In my mind I'm like OK, whatever, like nothing's going to come of it, because nothing's come of anything else. Recently, and I hop on this interview with some executives from this company and they were just so excited to meet me, they were so excited to hear about my experience as Miss Maryland and they were so excited to kind of figure out how my experience and my skill set lends to the job and to the company that I would be working for if I were to get the position. And so I'm so excited now that I finally have an answer for the people who say what are you doing next? I'll be working on Capitol Hill with a public affairs firm as an associate to the senior executives for the company. So I'm really excited to kind of dive into that part of my life while still pursuing my master's degree and seeing where everything leads. So super excited about that.

Raeanna Johnson: 56:04

Congratulations. That is really exciting and it helps with some of the angst of what's next. I mean, that was the thing is like I need.

Bridget O'Brien: 56:17

I was like I need. I need something, cause I'm I would. I would be sad, I'd be depressed, I'd be in my bed, not wanting to get out.

Raeanna Johnson: 56:25

Yes, yeah, it's very, very scary, but also you'd be okay. You'd be okay if you didn't have something lined up because all in good time and yeah, but I remember that that was, that was a really scary transition, because I also won right after I graduated from my undergrad, so I hadn't been in the professional world yet to build up my resume in that way. And you're totally right. Like, how do I, how do I articulate all the things that I've done in a year and how do I translate that into what they're looking for in this job position? It's, it's tricky, but it's just another one of those opportunities to kind of build your confidence in a space where you're uncertain and uncertain and have never been before. Yeah for sure, all right. So, as we're wrapping up our conversation, what advice would you give to the next Miss Maryland, or to anybody that's listening, that is vying for their state title and are really serious about taking this on and doing the best job they can do for a whole year?

Bridget O'Brien: 57:26

So the first thing is what I've been saying about you know wanting to do the job and like wanting to be your state title holder so bad, because then that gives you the passion, the drive to go and do like everything that you want to, to go and do like everything that you want to and promote the organization and keep your state title and your state organization relevant and in the face of different people, which I think is really important. The second thing is to enjoy the sisterhood and that's something that I've found and held so deeply with me this year from competing at Miss America and making those friends and it's so cliche because people say it all the time, but it's literally so true Like I have made friends with girls who will be in my wedding, who I will talk to every single day for the rest of my life, and it's just crazy how life works because you never know who you're going to meet or who your best friend might be standing right next to you in the lineup at Miss America and if you don't turn and talk to her, you'll never know that. And I literally experienced that where my roommate Kirsten she's Miss Massachusetts, we have become so, so close. Miss New York, abby Quammen. We literally went to college together, had a class together. She was two years older than me. We never talked, we weren't friends. It wasn't because we didn't like each other, we just didn't know each other. We get to Miss America.

Bridget O'Brien: 59:03

I text this girl every single day. She knows everything that I'm doing, at every single hour of the day. She will be in my wedding as a bridesmaid. Like, literally, she is my best friend. Lauren Frost, miss Oklahoma. Janae, miss Michigan. Annette, miss Texas. Like we literally text every single day, I'm going to Miss Oklahoma this weekend. So it's like one of those things where it's like, even at the local level, I have girls who I will be friends with for the rest of my.

Bridget O'Brien: 59:31

My all-time best friend was Miss Maryland's teen in 2018. I was her second runner-up. She has now. I was in her wedding as a bridesmaid. We were in the same sorority in college. She, her and her now husband introduced me to my now boyfriend. Like, literally, our families are best friends. And like you would never. If you don't just take that moment, if you're not blinders into the competition the whole time and you make those friends like, wow, your life will will change, which is so special. Um. And then the last thing is for those girls who know they want this job, who know that they would be the best x state title holder. If that is not what the outcome is this year, that does not mean that it will never be the outcome.

Bridget O'Brien: 1:00:28

I stood on that stage at Miss Maryland and watched five other girls win the crown that I wanted so bad and I celebrated them and I was so joyful for them and so excited for their year because I knew that if one day I was lucky enough to be in their shoes, I want the girls behind me to be clapping and be cheerful and be joyful for me too.

Bridget O'Brien: 1:00:54

And above anything else, you can learn so much from the experience, and it was honestly because I lost and I failed or didn't achieve that goal those years. That's why I was the Miss Maryland that I was or that I am. That's why I feel like that I truly was able to win the title, because I knew what I was going to bring to the table and how I was going to spread my message. And it's literally my whole brand of bouncing back from that failure to your catalyst and using it as a catalyst for success, because that thing that you didn't get could be the best thing that you never had, and you just don't realize it until you take a moment to reflect and learn from that experience and become better from it. So all of those things, I know I kind of just word vomited, but it's so, so important to remember.

Raeanna Johnson: 1:01:51

Oh, my gosh, bridget, thank you. Thank you for your time, Thank you for your heart, thank you for your stories and for pouring, like your passion into this conversation. Um, I really appreciate you and I'm excited to see where you go next in your career. And, um, you've definitely left a legacy for for future Miss Maryland to look up to and to find inspiration from. So, congratulations to you on a really incredible year, on a dream come true, and congratulations on all the awesome stuff that you are going to do in the future, cause it's kind of inevitable, you know. Thank you so much. That means a lot. You're welcome. All right, thanks again for joining you.

Raeanna Johnson: 1:02:36

Guys. I will be back again soon with another episode of Sash and Soul in our Crowned and Candid series, as we're kind of wrapping up this series here as we come to kind of the middle to end of the state season, and then we'll kind of be back to regularly scheduled programming as well. So stick around, reach out If you have any requests for who you want to hear from or topics that you'd love to hear discussed on Sash and Soul. And until we talk again, be well, take care of yourselves and we'll see you soon. Bye.