Sash & Soul

#61 Reframing Nerves: How to Channel Adrenaline Into Confidence

• Raeanna Johnson

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This week on Sash and Soul, Raeanna dives deep into one of the most universal parts of competition: nerves. Whether it's your heart racing before interview or your stomach flipping before walking on stage, that anxious energy isn't a sign of weakness... it's your body's way of saying, this matters to you. Raeanna breaks down the science behind the fight-or-flight response, shares her favorite mindset reframes, and offers practical tools to turn that adrenaline into focus and flow. From gentle mantras to grounding techniques and confidence-building reminders, this episode will help you see nerves not as the enemy, but as proof that you're showing up for something you care about.

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Raeanna:

Hey, what's up you guys? Welcome back to Sash and Soul. It is Friday for me and a lovely day. It did start off raining though, but I think it's gonna be drying up a bit. I'm actually really excited. It feels a little bit like Christmas for me because it was prime week or prime day this week, and I ordered a new desk chair that feels like a recliner and it has like a footrest and everything, and I'm so happy with it. The chair that I had before had like no lumbar support, and I realized like that might be part of the reason why I don't want to sit at my desk as much as I should be to be creating content and doing all the things that I need to be doing. So I'm super excited because this chair is amazing. Um, my husband thought it was gonna be too big for this space, but I'm like, bet. So I put it together and it's perfect. I love it. So anyway, that's my win for the day. It's the little things. And honestly, I think that's what we need to focus on these days is the little things that make us happy and bring us a little bit of joy. So that's mine for today. I have a new chair. Yay for me. Um, but lately, as we dive into this episode, I was really thinking about like what's been going on lately with my clients, and I've been having a lot of conversations with clients who are getting ready to compete. And a theme that keeps coming up and will always come up because it's just an inevitable part of the experience is nerves. So nerves being that very jittery, like heart-racing, can't sit still kind of energy that shows up right when you wish it wouldn't, like right before your interview or right before you need to walk out on stage for onstage question or talent or whatever it is, and you wish that you were just feeling calm and collected. So, like last weekend, for example, I had a client who had been feeling amazing all week. And this was her third local pageant of the season. So, another one of those where, like my recent episodes on Sash and Soul have been kind of deriving from my clients' experiences of competing weekend after weekend after weekend. And this week, in preparation, she was feeling really good. Like she had had a couple of practice runs, she was working out some of the kinks here and there. And so she was feeling super calm. She had this really positive energy and she was generally feeling at ease. And then the day of competition came. And so we hopped on our interview warm-up call, which I do with my clients before they walk into interview. We do just a little bit of easy warm-up to get your mind and mouth moving and um talk some mindset stuff to make sure that you're like really in that in that ideal space, right? Before walking into the room. And she told me how much anxiety she was having that morning. And it was completely throwing her off because she had been feeling so good. And I think she had this expectation that she would maintain that peaceful feeling. And I laughed to myself, I didn't laugh at her by any means because this is such a real experience. I told her that I wasn't surprised and that I was actually expecting it for her. Um, and I almost warned her about it, you guys. I almost warned her in her in our last call that don't I almost told her, don't be concerned if all of a sudden you wake up and you're like, where is this anxiety? Where are these nerves coming from? I wasn't expecting this. I'd been feeling so good. Um, because oftentimes when we feel good like that, leading up to a stressful or like high pressure situation, it hits us out of nowhere. And so I was sharing with her that nerves are okay. They are totally just our adrenaline showing and up in a really uneasy way. Um, I had an eight-year-old client. I don't know if I've talked about this on the podcast before, but it's one of my favorite stories. Um, my youngest client that I've ever had was eight years old. She was competing in a local county fair pageant. And we had a lot of conversations about nerves. And we had decided that, like, our mantra was now that nerves are welcome to the party because they're a natural part of the experience, but they're not allowed to ruin the party. And so just hearing that this was normal and a typical response to feel really good and then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, feel this anxiety rush really helped this client feel so much better. She ended up kind of making peace with that anxiety. Because part of it is like when you feel yucky, you get like worried that that is somehow a bad sign. But really, it's just our body and our mind's response to stress. Um, so once she kind of made peace with that, um, the day went really well and she ended up titling that day. So she's on her way to state, super excited for her. Um, but you know, it also reminds me of like for me, like it's so normal to have nerves, even after years of competing, after years of coaching, like I still get nervous. And the thing is that nerves don't go away. It's that we get more comfortable with the feeling because we're familiar with it. So the more that we're putting ourselves out there and experiencing that nervousness, the more comfortable and at peace we get with it. So, for example, when I was speaking about my brother's story, which was highly emotional and vulnerable, which is a very scary place to be, I had a mantra that helped me make peace with my nerves. And no matter how many times I gave a variation of that presentation, I still got nervous. But I would tell myself, you are going to say exactly what you're supposed to say, when you're supposed to, and how you're supposed to. And the people who need to hear it will. And that was enough to just kind of like allow myself to let go of the ownership that I was feeling of other people's experiences of my presentation and remind myself that I've I've done this before. This isn't new. I I'm going to present it just as passionately and genuinely as I've ever done before. And I have to let the rest go. And I think that if you have a mantra like that, that isn't so far into the affirmations of saying, like, you're gonna nail this, it's gonna be amazing. Because honestly, like our subconscious mind doesn't always vibe with that. It might be like, nah, I don't believe you. I'm still really nervous. And that's not really helping you. It may actually add increase your nerves. Um, instead, having a really gentle mantra that just kind of allows you to release it a little bit and put the trust and the faith back into yourself. So today we're gonna dive into this. We're gonna dive into how do we normalize the feeling of nerves, how do we shift our mindset when we need to, when we're feeling that nervousness, and ultimately, like how to just trust in your prep. Okay. So let's dive in. We spend so much time trying to make nerves go away. But honestly, nerves are just energy looking for direction. So you know how right before interview or walking on stage, your heart starts racing, your stomach feels like it's flipping, maybe you're a little nauseous, your hands get shaky, maybe your palms are sweating. That's not you being unprepared or dramatic. That is your body's natural fight or flight response kicking in. So consider this: that our what our brains are wired for protection. So, thousands of years ago, that same surge of adrenaline would have helped us run from danger or fight to survive. And that's what it does for us now if we're actually in some kind of physical danger. Still has that same immediate reaction. It's a survival mode. But now that same system in our brain can't really tell the difference between a real threat and a high-stakes situation, like a panel of judges or walking out into the spotlight. So here's what happens: your brain says something is important is coming. And then your body releases adrenaline and cortisol. Your heart rate is going to increase to send more oxygen to your muscles, your breathing quickens, and your senses heighten. And all signs of the all of these are signs that your body is preparing you to perform. But the thing is, in a high-stakes situation, like interview or performing your talent or on stage question, is that you don't need to fight or flee. You just need to focus. So instead of trying to shut the nerves off, the goal then is to reframe them as readiness. So that fluttering feeling, that's just energy. That fast heartbeat, that's your body gearing up to show you, uh, to help you show up powerfully. And when you understand that nerves are your body's way of saying, hey, this matters to you, let's just rise to the occasion, then it changes the entire experience. From there, you can take a deep breath, ground yourself, and remind your brain, I'm not in danger. I'm just about to do something brave. And that's a really, really important mindset shift. If you can be mindful, and I think that's a key component here when you're experiencing heightened nerves, is being mindful that this experience is a physiological reaction to this stressor. And again, if you can get into that rational space, which is hard to do when you're feeling really emotional, but get into that rational space of this is my brain going back a thousand years because it's wired to protect me. It's not noticing the difference between like the fact that there's no lion chasing me right now and trying to eat me. This is just me putting myself out there. I'm just being brave. If you can do that, then you take back control. You can normalize that feeling rather than feeling like it's controlling you. And so that tiny shift turns the fight or flight response into a focus and flow response, which helps you channel that adrenaline into presence, into confidence and excitement instead of fear. And this takes practice and it takes consistency, as does anything with mindset work. So I mentioned shifting the mindset. And so let me let me give you some examples and some tools that you can actually use to practice shifting your mindset. So we have to reframe what we're telling ourselves. Like we constantly are gonna say, like, I'm so nervous, I'm so nervous, I'm so nervous. What if I mess up? Like, what if I'm not prepared enough? What if, what if, what if? All these things that we're saying to ourselves in our brain is not actually helping us. So we have to reframe these thoughts. Instead of I'm so nervous, it's I'm excited. That's true, right? That's accurate. And here's the point, too. It I'm don't go from like this scary, like overwhelming thought of I'm so nervous, I'm so nervous, what if I mess up? to I'm gonna nail this if your brain isn't gonna be on board with that, like I said earlier. Instead, you have to shift the perspective to like, okay, the nerves that I'm feeling that I'm interpreting as nerves are just excitement. I'm excited. And it's uncomfortable because it feels really overwhelming, but that's okay. This is just excitement. So that's what I mean by this gentle reframing. You have to look at what's accurate. I've prepared for this, I've practiced, I've warmed up, I know myself and what I stand for. I have a mission, a vision, and a purpose. I know my why, and I'm focused on my big picture. Other things that I say to my clients are, I am who I am. I'm not trying to fit a mold. I'm gonna walk into that room and stay in my peace. And I'm gonna show them my heart and show them who I am. And it doesn't matter what they think of me, because this is me. And those are really hard things to grapple with, but that's the work. That's that's the preparation going into interview or going out into any kind of onstage performance is like this back-end work can't just be your practice. It has to be the mental preparation as well, of knowing yourself and knowing what you stand for and focusing on your big picture. And that's why mindset is so incredibly important because it will show up for you in the times when your adrenaline is taking over and making you think that you're not ready. You can also do a quick mental reset and shift in your perspective. So instead of what if I mess up, try what if this is one of those moments that I surprise myself. So you don't have to say, like, like an absolute statement of I'm gonna be awesome. You can pose it as a question to be a little more gentle. What if I do really well? And think about that, like answer that question for yourself. What if you did really well? That'd be great. That'd be so exciting. That'd be wonderful. Like you'd have nothing to regret. What if I perform better than I've ever performed? What if everything goes well? So we have to stop asking ourselves what the negative outcome could possibly be and ask ourselves instead, what is the positive outcome here? What if this goes off without a hitch? Doesn't that feel lighter? Like, even just talking about it right now to all of you, like I feel lighter from that space. And it's actually a really good reminder that I need to do that in other aspects of my life right now, too. Um, so this definitely transcends just preparing for a pageant and being their day of and managing your nerves. This is for anything in life. What if everything turns out just fine? That is just enough to help your nervous system calm down, right? Your body does not know the difference between anxiety and excitement. It is the same physiological response. So the story that you tell yourself or the questions that you ask yourself or the things that you focus on is what will change everything. And the next thing that you can do when you're shifting your, and there's there's multiple tools here, right? And this is this is the part of the work that we work on in Fearlessly Authentic is understanding the tools that we have and understanding when to use them. If your mental resets or shifts in perspective or reframing isn't quite doing it for you, then we got to go to grounding and distraction. So you gotta go to your get hyped playlist. You can try movement, which often helps ease that nervous energy. It gives it a place to go. You can try circular breathing, like breathing in for four, breathing out for four. You can try physically grounding. So pressing your feet into the floor and feeling the weight of your body. Um, one that I find to be really silly and uncomfortable for me, but I know it works, is smiling intentionally because it relaxes your nervous system. Because I literally just found out that laugh, laughter yoga is a thing. It's like a newer thing that was developed in the 1990s. Um, a client of mine was telling me about it. She had just come back from a conference, and like I like, I got so cringy when she was telling me, but literally, it's just you like fake laughing while looking at other people and like doing some random movement that's just silly. Um, but it like it's true, it triggers something in your nervous system to relax. Um you could, and this is something I always advise, call a friend, call a mentor or a coach for have for a grounding conversation. And that is what I offer all the time. That was one of my biggest mistakes when I was competing, was not actually reaching out for help when I needed it because I felt like I would be judged for it. If or I needed help, then I wasn't good enough or I wasn't prepared enough. And all of that were that was just lies, complete lies that I was telling myself. And when you are talking to that friend or that mentor, that coach, this is the difficult part. You have to practice believing their positive and uplifting validation of who you are and what you bring to the table. That's tough. You actually have to try to take it in and see it as truth. That's what will really help you during that grounding conversation. And remember, doing that, taking compliments, hearing people give you their love doesn't mean that you are overconfident or cocky if you believe them. That's humble confidence. Like show up with gratitude and love when people pour love into you. That's that's humility. Take it and pour it into others at the same time. That's humble confidence from my perspective. And the bottom line here is that you can't think away your nerves. You can't think your way out of your nerves. You have to breathe your way through them. So think of it as like waves crashing onto the shoreline that will retreat. And they may crash back again, but then they will retreat. This is not a permanent feeling, and they're not in control of you. You are in control of yourself. So do the things that you know that you have control over, and breathing is one of them, and focusing on that breath, practicing the destruction, reframing, giving yourself that mental reset and shift in perspective. All incredibly helpful tools. And finally, you need to trust your prep. You need to believe that you've put the work in. Caveat, if you haven't put the work in, these nerves are going to be way worse because they may actually be grounded in some reality. But chances are, more often than not, you have done more than enough in preparation for this. So nerves don't mean that you're unprepared. They mean that you're human. Nerves don't take away from the work that you've put in. So don't let your emotions convince you that you haven't done enough or that you're not ready. This is again back to the reframing, like I said before. I've prepared for this, I've practiced, I've warmed up, I know myself and what I stand for. I have a mission, a vision, and a purpose. I know my why, and I'm focused on my big picture. If all of that is accurate, then lean into that. At a certain point, it's no longer about knowing more because the work is done. And I learned that from a former Miss America that was um speaking at an event that I was in. And she said she used to come with her binder of information and studying all the articles that she had printed off and studying her paperwork and all of the practice questions and answers. And she said, when she got to Miss America, she finally realized, like, no, the work is done. Now it's time to just show up. And so it's not about knowing more because there's no amount of cramming that is going to help you succeed in a pageant competition. It's about trusting yourself more. And that's what you learn every time that you put yourself out there. The thing is, is that we cannot grow and evolve without contrast. Think about that. Like without something challenging us and without overcoming a challenge, how do we learn new skills? As a baby, when you were learning to walk every single time you fell on your bottom, you had to get back up and try again. And you learned every single time that you fell. Same with riding a bike, same with getting math problems wrong and having to figure out what you did wrong and learning from those mistakes. There's a thing called a confidence formula. And this is where you try something outside of your comfort zone, you experience success with that, you celebrate that success, and that builds confidence. And then you do it all over again. Like there's a reason why women in pageantry grow exponentially. It's because they keep challenging themselves by putting themselves out there. So always, always, always anchor yourself in your why. It's the reason that you're on that stage or in that interview. Focusing on your why is like putting blinders on to the things that will distract or disrupt your energy. Things outside of your control, like what other people do, think, or say, or comparison, the judges, the outcome, all of these things are outside of your control. So the only thing you can do is trust what you've done. Trust where you've come from and how much you've grown by putting yourself out there over and over again. And see this as another opportunity to grow, another opportunity to learn. It's just contrast, and we don't have to be afraid of the contrast. In fact, if you think about it, we should be celebrating the contrast. How many people out there avoid hard things and then they get stuck? They're not growing. They may be comfortable, but it's a false sense of comfort because they're not really evolving into everything that they could possibly be and achieving all of the things that they could possibly achieve because they're not putting themselves out there. But you are. You keep showing up over and over and over again because you believe in yourself, even in those moments where you don't, you still do deep down, and you gotta lean into that. So trust yourself. Let your nerves be proof that you're showing up for something that you deeply care about. Practice the skills and use these tools to manage the adrenaline rush or this fight or flight response that you're biologically feeling. Lean into what's accurate and focus on your purpose. And remember that you don't have to call them the butterflies. I love this. You just teach them to fly in formation. I love that. I think that's so beautiful. That comes with practice and repetition. And when you keep putting yourself out there, those nerves will feel more like friends, more like this familiar feeling that you know you're doing something powerful because you're having this biological natural reaction, which means that you're putting yourself out there. So own it. Enjoy it. Because honestly, like without that experience, would it really be as fun? Without the challenge, would it really be as fun? Like, why would we do it? You're doing this because you love the personal growth. You're doing it because you're competitive. You do it, you're doing it because you want to be validated for the work that you're putting in, and you want to go out there and do incredible things. So don't let those nerves stand in your way. Own them, feel them, get used to them, and work with them. Okay. All right, my friends. Have an incredible week. Keep putting yourself out there, keep doing that deep work. Reach out if you have anything else that's on your heart or on your mind that you want to hear me talk about that's really, really relevant to you right now. I'm always looking for input from you guys. So feel free to DM me. And I will be back next week with the same heart and love for you from Sash and Soul. All right, you guys, take care. I'll talk to you then. Bye.

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Raeanna Johnson

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