S2 Ep29. Lighting Candles & Opening Gifts: Melissa Majors on Self-Care and Purpose

Join host Aderonke Bademosi Wilson for an uplifting and heartwarming conversation with Melissa Majors, a dynamic leader, educator and storyteller whose journey is as inspiring as it is authentic. In this episode, Melissa opens up about her life as the youngest of nine children, her deep love for nature and her proud role as a boy mom. Her story is rich with moments of resilience, humor and profound insight, including a touching reflection on teaching her father to read, and a surprising revelation about her secret life as a romance writer.

As the conversation unfolds, Melissa shares how her personal experiences have shaped her professional mission. From leading high-performing teams to writing books that empower leaders to create inclusive, people-centered environments.  She brings a wealth of wisdom and warmth to every aspect of her work. Her dedication to integrity, self-care and financial independence shines through, offering listeners tangible takeaways for navigating life and leadership with purpose.

Melissa’s background is anything but ordinary. Growing up in a large, close-knit family that valued the outdoors, she learned early on the importance of resilience and inclusion, lessons deeply influenced by her parents’ interracial marriage. These early life experiences planted the seeds of empathy and determination that now guide her in every area of her life.

Throughout the episode, Melissa reflects on some of her most vulnerable and transformative moments. She recounts the powerful experience of teaching her father to read as a child, a milestone that sparked her lifelong commitment to education and empowerment. She also shares the difficult but courageous decision to walk away from a beloved leadership role in order to stay true to her values, an act that speaks volumes about her character and clarity.

Professionally, Melissa’s achievements are both impressive and impactful. She is the author of Help Them Thrive, a guide to human-centered leadership, and The Seven Simple Habits of Inclusive Leaders, a practical roadmap for creating spaces where people feel seen, heard and valued. Her leadership has fueled double-digit growth by prioritizing inclusion and empowerment, and her mentoring work has helped emerging leaders like Joanna Smith embrace their purpose with confidence.

Beyond her corporate work, Melissa is committed to helping everyday people find their voice. She launched the Community Keynotes podcast to give non-professional speakers a platform to share their stories, further demonstrating her belief in the power of connection and storytelling.

Self-care is another cornerstone of Melissa’s life. She talks about how practices like yoga, meditation and even lighting a candle while in the shower help her stay grounded and energized. Her concept of a choice fund, a financial cushion that allows for values-aligned decisions is a game-changer for those seeking freedom in both career and life.

At the heart of this episode is a powerful message about connection and belonging. Melissa shares practical strategies for building bridges in a divided world, emphasizing the role of empathy, shared experiences and intentional relationships. Whether she’s modeling fairness for her sons, finding joy in golf and cooking or reflecting on heartfelt feedback from those she’s inspired, her story is one of courage, care and meaningful impact.

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Transcript

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (00:02.478)
Welcome to another edition of ABWilson's Heart of the Matter, a podcast that uses overwhelmingly positive questions to learn about our guests, where every episode uncovers extraordinary stories of triumph, growth, and empowerment. Hi, I'm Aderonke Bademosi Wilson, and my guest on today's show is Melissa Majors. Melissa is an inspirer, a boy mom, and nature lover. Melissa, welcome to the show.

Melissa Majors (00:35.576)
Thank you so much for having me. It's an honor to be here.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (00:38.78)
So Melissa, you've described yourself as a boy mom. How many boys do you have?

Melissa Majors (00:43.788)
I have two boys officially, my 10-year-old son and my 12-year-old son. My husband counts as a boy sometimes. And I also have a little fur baby named Ziggy. So I am surrounded by testosterone in my house.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (00:57.404)
Well, that's well then definitely. Nature lover, what does that look like?

Melissa Majors (01:05.026)
I love being outside and being in the outdoors. I'm the youngest of nine kids. My sisters were older and then there were all these boys and then there was me and they were all outdoorsmen and nature lovers. So if I was going to get out of the house, I had to hang out and do what they did. So they were fishing and hunting and hiking and always being outside. And it's just a part of what I absolutely love is finding the beauty in nature. And so you'll find me out doing the same things today. Camping, fishing, hunting, golfing, anything that's outside brings me joy.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (01:35.044)
And is there a particular activity that you lean more towards of all your outdoor activities?

Melissa Majors (01:42.038)
I love to do yoga outside. So we'll talk more about what sparks joy and balance and all that I'm sure in our conversation, but I'd like to take my yoga mat outside under a tree and it just centers me. Hearing the nature just, it's my favorite.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (01:57.852)
Inspirer, tell me about that.

Melissa Majors (02:00.808)
That's my life's calling is to inspire people to be even better versions of themselves. I do that through the books that I have written. I've written two books. I speak on stages all around the world. And my point is to help people become even better and inspire them to maximize their gifts and use them. That's what I absolutely love to do. It's my calling. And I try to do as much as I can.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (02:31.01)
And you said you've written two books. Tell me about your book.

Melissa Majors (02:34.424)
Sure. The latest one is called Help Them Thrive. And it's all about human-centered leadership of ourselves and of others. And there's so many ways that oftentimes in our working lives that aren't geared necessarily to help bring out the best performance in humans. You have to pay attention to what the brain needs and the emotional needs and the wellness needs are. And when you can get that formula right, people really can thrive and maximize their output and feel good about the value and the impact they're leaving in the workplace. But unfortunately, too often we create these unintentionally toxic workplaces that just aren't designed for people to do well. And so I try to help leaders really understand what do people need to be their best and design an environment that can help them do that. And part of that, a big part of that starts with finding ways to help yourself thrive as a leader as well. And then that cascades down to your team. This first book is called The Seven Simple Habits of Inclusive Leaders. That's the first one that came out, let's see, in May of 2020. And it's all about how do you leverage inclusion as a business advantage? So I have 25 years of experience leading high-performing teams of people. And the reason why we're so high performing...

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (03:36.028)
Mm.

Melissa Majors (04:00.718)
I mean, every team that I led across a variety of different industries, every team that I led achieved double-digit growth, every one of them, because people were able to perform at their best. And when I peel back what we were doing that caused people to thrive and really maximize their performance, we were inclusive before it even had a label. So I put labels on it and really peeled back how you can achieve better performance outcomes by being inclusive. And that's what that one's about.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (04:30.844)
Melissa, thank you so much for sharing and I'm sure we're going to come back to some of your points a little later. Please share three interesting things about yourself that our listeners may not know and your friends will be surprised to learn.

Melissa Majors (04:49.71)
This is my favorite question. Okay, are you ready for this? It's a little scandalous. Is that okay? You ready for some scoop? One of the first things I wanted to share is I taught my father how to read. And you know, I'm a storyteller, so I'm gonna tell you a story about this. I was maybe seven or eight years old and I went to my father with a book and I said, daddy, will you read this book to me? And he was watching a Western on television. He brushed me off and said,

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (04:54.524)
I'm ready, let's go.

Melissa Majors (05:19.31)
No, no, no, I don't have time. I'm watching TV. I'm a daddy's girl. I was completely distraught and felt ignored. I went to my mother in tears and I said, daddy refused to read this book to me. I don't understand why. And it was at that moment she realized that she needed to tell me the truth. And she said, sweetie, there is nothing more that your father wouldn't want to do is read that book for you. But the truth is he doesn't know how to read. And your father was raised in the deep South during a time when a black man's muscles were valued more than their brains. And so he had a third grade education and that's as far as he went. But he is the smartest person that I know. That's what she said. And to this, you know, he absolutely was very clever and could read, couldn't read books, read people like nobody's business. And it was in that moment, that was a defining moment for me because I became enthralled and deeply curious about how do you educate people well and how do you break down barriers to education? And that's prompted a career of educating people. And so I've run education services teams for most of my career, but my very first student was my father when we learned how to read together. And so that's something that not very many people know.
The second thing is, this is a little scandalous, I write steamy love stories under a pseudonym. Nobody knows this. I'm dropping it for the first time on your podcast, honey.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (06:58.224)
Okay, okay, now people don't know this about me. I read steamy love stories. And I don't really talk about it that much. So I need to, if you're comfortable, what is your pseudonym?

Melissa Majors (07:04.03)
Eww.

Melissa Majors (07:11.758)
I can't share it. It's anonymous. It's completely anonymous, but I'll somehow find a way to get this to you. But we all have a steamy side to us where, and that's why I started doing this. I realized that being an author, I'm really great at writing business stuff, but ooh, I just have a special love and passion for romantic, steamy love stories. So we'll find a way confidentially to get it to you and read it.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (07:38.938)
Okay, and I will tell you if I've read some of your books, or if I've read all of your books, you know, we're gonna have, we'll have a separate, if possible, mic conversation about this deep dark secret that we both share.

Melissa Majors (07:53.667)
Done.
I love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it. Love it.
I was dating this guy that was head over heels in love with my high school sweetheart. He was so fine and good looking, but he wasn't any good. I remember we would sit around and listen to music and I would sing and he would say, who sang that song originally? I'd say Mariah Carey or Beyonce, whoever it was. Well, let them sing the song then was his response. And just in time, it took my confidence away and my joy from singing. And that's how those phobias get developed and those fears get developed in the mind. So even though I have lots of people overcome their fears, I can speak to it because I have one too. I'm going to overcome it one of these days, but that is not, that's something that not very many know.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (09:11.964)
Thank you for sharing. Thank you for sharing your three interesting things. And I definitely learned all those things about you. So.

Melissa Majors (09:13.294)
You're welcome.

Melissa Majors (09:22.862)
Well, good. You want to spill some tea, let's do it.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (09:28.348)
Melissa, can you tell us about a recent accomplishment or success that you're particularly proud of?

Melissa Majors (09:36.714)
There's two, if you don't mind me sharing two. So the first one I'll share about is my father that I mentioned. He passed away about eight months ago. And I delivered the eulogy at his funeral. And it was such an honor. It was the most important and personally impactful speech I'd ever delivered. I lived my life on stage. And he was such an incredible storyteller. And he would share all these stories about his life and challenges and accomplishments and funny experiences and things. And I listened, I sat at his feet and I listened. And so at his funeral, I just told the stories of his life through the stories that he shared with me. And it was such an honor. And in the audience, people were laughing and they were crying and they were singing and it was just a party all about him through his life story. I think that is over the last, well, just in general, I think that's an accomplishment I'm very, very proud of and a moment that landed well for my daddy.
And then the second thing was when we met at the We Speak Bermuda events. My goodness gracious. I just, I became full of inspiration myself being in the room, so many incredible women and people.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (10:44.87)
Mm-hmm.

Melissa Majors (11:03.21)
And teen girls, it brought the best performance out of me being surrounded by so much positivity and energy. And based on the feedback that's come in, I just feel like we made a major impact and changed some lives together. So that's a huge accomplishment. I spoke for two days straight. The first day was two two-hour workshops, one where you and I met. And then I spoke to teen girls and my goodness, let me tell you those girls. I couldn't wait to be in the room with them. But so many of them came up during the session. I intentionally created opportunities for them to stand up in front of a hundred other girls and just speak with the mic. They didn't have to say much. They had to do something. And so many of them walked in the room, deathly afraid to speak. And then when they left, they felt empowered to speak because I got a chance to. So it just felt like I made a difference in the lives of those girls. And one of them called me after. And she said, I was so afraid in class I would always sit in the back of the room. I haven't sat in the back of the room since, I've been in the front of the room. And it's just so wonderful. Those are two incredible accomplishments I'm very proud of.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (12:14.708)
And first of all, condolences to you and your family on the passing of your dad. And congratulations in sharing his story and sharing in a way that was meaningful for everybody in attendance. And yes, I remember meeting you. I was so encouraged and enthusiastic following your talk.

Melissa Majors (12:18.318)
Thank you.

Melissa Majors (12:30.968)
Thank you.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (12:40.932)
And the music and your words of wisdom that you imparted, it really made me come up to you after and say, first, let's take a picture together, and second, would you be on my podcast? And you instantly said yes. And so I appreciate you saying yes. I appreciate you coming to Bermuda and sharing your knowledge with us.

Melissa Majors (12:52.216)
Yeah.

Melissa Majors (13:03.016)
It was an honor. Thank you so much. Honor to be here with you continuing the conversation. Yes.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (13:08.358)
So Melissa, please tell us about a time when you made a difference in another's life. What were the circumstances? Paint a picture for me, please.

Melissa Majors (13:18.342)
Absolutely. I want to tell you about Joanna Smith. So during the pandemic, my business, speaking business dried up. Nobody was having any events. Well, I was talking to another one of my colleagues. His name is Amani Roberts. He's an author and a speaker as well. And he says, you know, even though we don't have any events to go to, we still have something that people need to hear. Let's figure out how to, how to make that happen. So we launched this podcast called Community Keynotes in which he would manage and produce the virtual podcast and the show. I would coach non-professional speakers. If you're a professional speaker, you couldn't come on. Non-professional speakers on how to tell their story. And so it was such an incredible experience because we had stories of people who had made up their mind to commit suicide and then something happened like a duck walked up to them and it snapped them out of it and they changed their mind and dedicated their lives to suicide prevention. We had a woman on there who found out at the age of 61 that she was biracial. It was so good. But people revealed these vulnerable things about themselves. One of the guests, Joanna Smith, was a geotechnical engineer, young Black woman, so bright, so smart. And she told the story on how she blends music. She's a pianist, but also she's a STEM instructor. She told the story and how she blends piano and music and roller skating to make science and math relatable to kids where they understand it. And her dream was to reach 5,500,000 children with this message over a certain period of time. But she was in this career. She'd spent all this time investing in this career and she was great at it, but she was not fulfilled. And so we continued to chat after the podcast and I mentored her through making decisions on whether to stay or go on her career journey. And ultimately she took the leap. And let me tell you, fast forward a few years later, this woman is fierce and on fire. She's on stages, she's educating children in a way they really understand, and she's making a meaningful impact and shift in the way that these topics are taught.

Melissa Majors (15:42.028)
She's living her absolute best life. And I feel so proud that I was part of that journey to help her take the leap, believe in her gift, and use it with the world. So Joanna Smith, that's one major accomplishment in how I was able to help inspire somebody.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (16:00.57)
And so what were the key strengths and qualities you relied on to make a difference for Joanna Smith?

Melissa Majors (16:06.382)
Paying attention to what made her beam when she talked to me. When you ask her, you choose curiosity and you ask questions about what are you good at? What do you want to do? What doesn't make you feel good related to the work that you do? You can quickly assess somebody's passions and gifts that they may not be using. So curiosity to understand and uncover people's potential, looking for those gifts on purpose and then helping them believe in their gifts and giving them opportunity to use them. I think those are the key strengths I used.

Melissa Majors (16:06.382)
...so curiosity to understand and uncover people's potential, looking for those gifts on purpose, and then helping them believe in their gifts and giving them opportunity to use them. I think those are the key strengths I used.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (16:33.210)
That’s beautiful. Thank you for sharing that story. Melissa, can you share a challenge or setback you’ve faced and how you overcame it?

Melissa Majors (16:42.115)
Absolutely. I think the one that stands out the most is when I had to walk away from a role that I absolutely loved. I was the head of learning and development for a company, leading a team that I adored. But the organization started to make decisions that didn’t align with my values. There was a moment where I realized I was being asked to do things that didn’t sit well with me, and I had to make a choice.
I remember sitting down with my husband and talking about it, and I said, “I refuse to cash my values in for a paycheck.” That was a hard decision because I loved my team and the work, but I knew I couldn’t stay. What helped me get through it was having what I call a “choice fund”—six months of living expenses saved up so I could walk away if I ever needed to. That gave me the freedom to make a decision that was right for me and my family, not just my bank account.
It was scary, but it was also empowering. And it taught me the importance of integrity and being prepared for the unexpected.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (17:51.872)
That’s such a powerful lesson. Thank you for sharing that. What advice would you give to someone facing a similar crossroads?

Melissa Majors (18:00.293)
My advice is to listen to your intuition. Women’s intuition is real. It is a strength and a weapon. If something doesn’t feel right, pause and pay attention to that feeling. Also, plan ahead. If you have a solid six months of living expenses saved up, you have choices. It’s not always easy, but it gives you the power to make decisions that are aligned with your values.
And finally, don’t be afraid to walk away from something that doesn’t serve you. There’s always something better on the other side, even if you can’t see it yet.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (18:41.890)
That’s so good. Melissa, what are some of your favorite ways to practice self-care?

Melissa Majors (18:48.205)
Oh, I love this question! I prioritize self-care unapologetically. I need quiet time to pause, reflect, and prove that I love myself. Yoga and meditation are my go-tos. I also love to take walks in nature, light candles, and sometimes just sit in silence.
One of my favorite rituals is lighting a candle in the shower. It’s a simple thing, but it reminds me to slow down and be present. I also journal and listen to music that lifts my spirit. Self-care isn’t selfish—it’s necessary.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (19:30.751)
That sounds wonderful. What brings you the most joy in your life right now?

Melissa Majors (19:36.819)
My boys bring me the most joy—my two sons and my husband. Watching them grow and learn is such a gift. I also find joy in helping others thrive, whether it’s through my books, speaking, or just having a meaningful conversation.
When someone says, “This was a life changer,” that is joy like no other. And of course, being in nature, cooking, and spending time with friends and family all fill my cup.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (20:08.334)
Melissa, what is the legacy you hope to leave?

Melissa Majors (20:12.782)
I hope my legacy is one of inclusion, empathy, and courage. I want people to remember that I helped them believe in themselves and use their gifts. I want my sons to see that it’s possible to live with integrity and make a difference in the world.
And I want to encourage others to share their lessons—the vulnerable ones, the fun ones. Don’t take that wisdom to the grave. Open the gifts God has given you and use them unapologetically.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (20:44.327)
That’s beautiful. Is there a book or resource you’d recommend to our listeners?

Melissa Majors (20:49.414)
Yes! I love the book “Ready to Rise” by Jo Saxton. It’s all about embracing your voice, gathering your community, and stepping into your calling. It’s inspiring and practical. I also recommend my own books—“Help Them Thrive” and “The Seven Simple Habits of Inclusive Leaders”—for anyone interested in human-centered leadership and inclusion.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (21:15.002)
Thank you, Melissa. How can people connect with you or learn more about your work?

Melissa Majors (21:20.361)
You can find me at melissamajors.com or email me at hello@melissamajors.com. I love connecting with people and hearing their stories.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (21:30.982)
Thank you so much for joining me today, Melissa. This has been such a rich and inspiring conversation.

Melissa Majors (21:36.211)
Thank you for having me. It’s been a joy.

Aderonke Bademosi Wilson (21:39.442)
And thank you to our listeners for tuning in to Heart of the Matter. Don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review. Until next time, keep thriving and living from the heart.