Immersion
A search for how to live a meaningful life in the modern world. Exploring psychology, philosophy, and the world around us. Let’s dive 30 minutes beneath the surface each Sunday together. | Hosted by Pamela Carey
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Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional or licensed psychologist
Immersion
Why Millennials Are Not Having Kids (Part 1): History & Economics
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In this video, we explore why millennials are not having kids, looking at the declining birth rate through the lens of history, economics, and sociology.
We go beyond the usual headlines about money to discuss intensive parenting, modern developments, demographic transitions, environmental concerns, and the real cost of raising a family in the modern world.
Throughout this journey, we ask the central question: Are millennials overcomplicating this decision, or is the world actually more complicated now?
In this deep dive, we cover:
* The "Opt-In" Generation: How women's rights and optionality flipped the script from "when" to "if."
* The Burnout Factor: How "Intensive Parenting" and modern complexity have replaced physical labor with mental exhaustion.
* The Hard Questions: Such as navigating the biological clock and the "selfish" stigma
Link to part 2 here: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2318937/episodes/18450034
The Economic Reality: Why the "village" disappeared and the true cost of raising a child in 2025.
00:00 Intro
00:52 Are We Overcomplicating It?
02:11 Women's Rights & The Shift
03:14 The First Generation to "Opt In"
03:42 Climate Change & Uncertainty
04:23 Maternal Healthcare
04:52 Opportunity Cost & Optionality
05:51 Intensive Parenting & Time Demands
07:23 Where is the Village? (Isolation)
07:46 Modern Complexity & Mental Overwhelm
09:44 Longevity & Irreversibility
11:07 Weighing the Pros & Cons of Parenthood (My Experience)
13:07 Finding Community & Steps After the Choice
15:30 Is it Selfish to Not Have Kids?
18:27 The Question of Family Size
19:15 Birthrates: A Historical View
21:13 The Impact on Men
22:07 The Economics of Parenthood
26:37 The Biological Clock & Feeling "Ready
Resources or further reading:
Time parenting: https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2018/11/29/more-than-one-in-ten-u-s-parents-are-also-caring-for-an-adult/
Birth rates in the 1900s: https://ourworldindata.org/baby-boom-seven-charts
Demographic transition:
https://ourworldindata.org/demographic-transition
On fertility after 35: https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20240313-the-fertility-myth-most-advice-says-womens-fertility-declines-after-35-the-truth-is-more-complicated
Birthrates rising for ages 40-44: https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db535.htm
Many women still do not have control over this choice: https://news.un.org/en/story/2025/11/1166257
On the cost of childcare: https://www.epi.org/press/updated-resource-calculates-the-cost-of-child-care-in-every-state-child-care-is-more-expensive-than-public-college-tuition-in-38-states-and-washington-d-c/