10 Lies Stopping You From Hitting Your First $100K

SheEO is officially open - click the link to learn more and claim your spot. 

See you on the inside!

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If you’ve ever wondered how successful coaches seem to start, build and maintain their business, let me spill the tea. In this episode, you’ll uncover the 10 lies and mindset shifts that can help you get unstuck, unlock abundance & build the freedom-based business, no matter where you’re starting from. 

Transcript

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Hello, and welcome to this week's episode of the Building Her podcast. I'm your host, Katia Lillian. If you've been loving this podcast, go ahead and rate the podcast five stars and DM me on Instagram when you do that because I want to personally thank you. If you are new here, hit that subscribe button. It really helps the podcast grow, and that way you will never miss an episode. Before we dive into today's episode, I do need to remind you that She-E-O is open for enrollment right now. Unfortunately, you did miss early bird, but if you are really, really interested, then go ahead and DM me on Instagram, She-E-O, so that I can see it at the top of my messages, and let's get you in. She-E-O is my four-month group coaching business mastermind for early and aspiring coaches to help you start and build your business, to show up powerfully online, and to scale to your first 100K and beyond. This program is near and dear to my heart. This is the fourth round. I have invited Cassie Kovacs into our circle so that we get to include and incorporate somatic breathwork into our practice so that we can release those subconscious blocks. We went live, this week on Instagram, so if you missed it, I'll link it in the show notes below. But it's gonna be an amazing experience, and I'm just so excited for the women who are joining and who will continue joining this space. So if you are interested at all, DM me on Instagram, She-E-O, or just click on the link here in the show notes below. That'll take you to the webpage with all the information, and I hope to see you inside. Hey, my name is Katia Lilian, and I am obsessed with all things mindset, personal development, and helping you build the best version of yourself. I'm a women's life and mindset coach and an entrepreneur who started a fun hobby of posting #sweatyselfies, grew a successful side hustle, and now I run a six-figure coaching business. I teach you the secret of building a life that aligns with your deepest values and one that you wake up excited for. This podcast is designed to expand your mind and challenge the status quo. So get ready to uplevel your life and let's start building her. Today's episode is devoted to the 10 lies stopping you from hitting your first 100K. I wanna just dive in. I wanna get through these 10 lies. I want them to be tangible. I want them to be actionable for you. I want this to be short and sweet and concise so that you can have the rest of your day to apply some of these things. So number one lie. I need to know what my niche is before I sign a client I don't know how many times I've said this, clarity comes after messy action, not before it. And nobody likes the messy action part, I know, but that's where the clarity happens. I just had this conversation with a client yesterday, a private client, and she was like, "I don't know what to do. I feel a little stuck. I don't know if I want to do one-on-one coaching. I don't know if I wanna create a digital course. I don't know if I wanna launch a group program." And I said, "I- you won't know until you try," right? You need to try private coaching. You need to try a digital program. You need to try a course. And once you actually have data, then you can decide, "Okay, I like this," or, "I don't like this." And then you try something else. You don't need to choose now. It doesn't need to be set in stone. It's not a life sentence. You can choose later, but after you have the information to base your decision off of. So you don't need to know what your niche is. When I first started, I was a life and mindset coach. That was all-encompassing on purpose, right? It was casting a wide net so I could help women with anything based off of my experience and based off of my integrity, because I've been there, and I wouldn't know what I could help them with until we got into a consultation call. And then they talked to me about body images- issues, or they talked to me about career issues or identity crisis, and I was like, "Oh my gosh, I'm talking to a past version of myself because I've been there, done that, and now I'm on the other side," so of course I could help them. So then I would pitch my offer on the consultation call. But that's not every time. There was one consultation call where a woman asked me about, um, her physical appearance. Not so much body image insecurities, but more so, like, specifically her hair. And I was like, "Eh, I don't know how much I can help you here," so I didn't offer it to her. Or some people open up to me about their relationships, which I absolutely, um, did help support my private coaching clients for a while in that, but that's not really what I love. It's not my bread and butter, and so I would not offer them because I don't want to be a relationship coach. But again, I didn't know that until I got onto these calls, so I didn't know what my niche was. I picked life and mindset because, again, that was all-encompassing, and that was also based off of my experience with Tony Robbins and my own mindset work. And so I was like, "Let's just try that." And then I tried it, and I was like, "Okay, I like this." But there were elements of it, too, where I didn't like it, hence why I never marketed that or sold that. And it wasn't until What, two years later, three years later after doing that, now I had data and I had success in my business. I hit up my first 100K, so I was like, "Oh, well now because of this experience I could teach business coaching," hence why I'm also doing that now. So I had to do things first before then I figured out, okay, this is my niche. Lie number two, you need to go viral in order to be successful. Of cou- of course there are people that go viral and they just so happen to have something that they're selling, usually a low ticket offer in their link in bio, so they're, that's gonna convert and they might make lots of money, thousands of dollars. I don't know. But there's also people that go viral and it does nothing for their business 'cause maybe the video doesn't even, it's not even targeted and, um, talking to their ideal client. So now you just get all these followers if you do get followers, but they're not gonna buy 'cause they're not your ideal client, so the conversion is really low, right? That happens too. That happened to me like how many years ago, right? I did some funny voiceover and I did actually make or hit millions of views and I got like 3,000, 5,000 followers, but I didn't have anything to sell. So it did nothing for me, right? So virality, you have to get it out of your head that that's the end-all be-all in order to be successful, right? Your first few clients, they're not gonna come from that type of funnel. They're gonna come from the existing community that you have. They're probably sitting in your, in your followers right now, but you haven't talked to them. You haven't had a conversation with them. You don't even need to post online to get your first three clients because you already have existing people in your community and in your network and in your phone, right? You're on a texting basis. And maybe it's not like your friend. I understand you don't wanna coach your friend, but maybe they know someone, right? If you're truly loud about, "Hey, I'm a coach now and I have my coaching services and would love to help someone with XYZ. Do you know anyone that could benefit from this?" I guarantee you'd already have some calls lined up. So virality helps when you have a digital course, a low ticket offer so that it can convert pretty easily without having trust and know you very well, right? That, that's virality, but that's also later in the game. You don't need that to start. You don't need that to get your first three clients. You don't need that to make tens of thousands of dollars or your first 100K. Lie number three, if I'm good at coaching, clients will just come. No. No, they won't, because you need to learn sales. People are timid. People are shy. They don't know what they want. They don't know what's going to help them. They are listening to all the podcasts. They're listening and watching all the YouTube videos. They're reading all the books, but they don't know that you are the answer. They don't know that you are the solution So you need to do your part, and you have to be proactive. You have to be the one that reaches out first. Coaching and selling are two completely different skill sets. I read this book, and I recommend it to all of my private clients, The Prosperous Coach, because they talk about coaching and selling is not synonymous, and most coaches actually quit because they don't like the selling part. They just wanna have the clients, and they just wanna get to coach. But unfortunately, in order to build your own coaching business, you do need to learn sales. And so what I would just recommend is hunker down, put your head down, and learn sales so that it can feel very automatic to you, and you can sell on autopilot. It doesn't have to feel so heavy and hard all the time. It's just in the short term, it's temporary, so that you can learn it and then have a thriving coaching business. So the basics of starting and building a business, it, it's really the foundation, right? And when I say that, it's sales. It, it's learning to talk to people. That is the foundation. Think of it like a house. If you have, you know, PDF downloads, digital courses, that's all great, but it's on a rocky foundation. And so if there's splits and cracks in this foundation, it's just a matter of time before it crumbles. And so the basis of your coaching business is learning how to sell, no matter what level you're at, right? Even if you are amazing at marketing and you have funnels, which are just emails, by the way. Sending a voice note to a prospect via DMs closes the trust gap a lot faster than sending three targeted emails. And you also have to remember, marketing is just sales at scale, so if you have no sales experience, then what are you marketing? You have to learn sales first, then you can market it because marketing is, again, just hitting thousands, hundreds of thousands of people. It's at scale Lie number four, I need to get a certification, or if you have one, you need another one. You don't need more certifications. You need conversations. You need people. You need clients. That is how you gain the experience. That is how you gain the knowledge, the wisdom. I've been doing this for six years. I got my first client October 2020. I have been doing this for six years. I have a life coaching certification, and that is it. And I would actually even advise I didn't need to get that, so you don't need to get that, right? Because life coaching, it's based off of your experience. Of course, it might be different with nutrition coaching, and you can get it through IWA, for example, or IIN is another popular one. Um, fitness coaching, you know, NASM certification. A- and I understand that because there are certain limitations or, um, nuances to someone's eating habits or sensitivities or allergies or dietary restrictions, and same with body. Um, you obviously don't want to get injured. You know, all that stuff. But with life coaching or mindset coaching, well, that's all based off of you. Your life is your certification. So you don't need to get a certification there. You actually just need to learn sales. You need to get your first client, and then that is your experience. Lie number five, I need more experience in order to charge thousands. No, you don't. And also, how do you even get experience? Well, you gotta get clients, right? So you have to just kinda like bite the bullet and pitch your offer even though you feel nervous and scared, but you have to do it anyways. And you have to also understand that money is just an energetic exchange, right? So, like, my first coach ever, she always said, "Is your price above the bar of resentment?" Meaning, can I show up in my full capacity and energetically serve you and support you without feeling like I'm being robbed, or I'm not making the kind of money that I deserve, right? There's that resentment there. So if I feel like the number is above that bar of resentment, and if you feel like you are getting the value and the exchange and the support, everything that was pitched in the offer, well, now that money is just more so for them to be like, "I'm in this," right? And you have to understand the price is rooted in th- that transformation. It's the client's transformation. It's not in your coaching worth, worth. Let me say that again. The price is rooted in your client's transformation, the A to B promise. It is not in how good you are as a coach. So therefore, your experience, especially in the beginning, does not matter because they're not hiring you for your experience. They're hiring you for the solution that you are putting out there that is something that you can solve, that you can solve their problem. That's all that people want. Lie number six, I need more confidence in order to help someone. How is confidence built? You're not confident in the beginning. You're scared shitless. What I would actually say is you need courage in order to help someone. You need courage to put yourself out there. You need courage to price your offers. You need courage to sell your offer. You need courage to show up on a consultation call, right? Over those courageous acts over time, that is where you will build confidence, right? Build-- put a confidence token in the confidence bucket every time you have a consultation call, every time you actually book a client. Like, that is where your confidence is built because now your brain has proof and evidence that you can do this, that you can get onto a call and you can close, that you can pitch your offer and not feel like you, you know, are about to have a heart attack. So you actually don't need confidence in order to help someone. You just need courage in order to help someone, trusting that it will turn into confidence. Lie number seven, I need to build out my program first before I can sell it. You definitely need, like, an idea, sure, like the offer. What are-- are you coaching for three months, six months? Are-- how often are you meeting? What are, what are the cadence of the calls? Like, all of that needs to be ironed out, sure, because that's what you're going to set, sell and pitch on the call. But in terms of an entire program, no. You could build as you go. I actually did that with She-E-O. So I guess I should be clear. With private coaching, it's just you, your time, and the client. Like, it's just calls basically for a set amount of time. Sure, you could have, you know, an online portal with prerecorded videos or PDFs or downloads or worksheets, but you can provide that as you go. That's why private coaching is so much more than group coaching or any digital course you'll ever buy, because it's catered and custom to the private client. So you don't know what they need until you cross that bridge, until you get onto a call, right? Then you identify the roadblocks and the limiting beliefs and the mindset stuff going on. Then it's like, okay, well, let me give them this worksheet. Or, oh, you know what? Let me give them this PDF download or... Right? So, um, and SheEO-- so that's private coaching. And SheEO, I knew that I was launching SheEO, and I had the, um, photos, and I knew that it would be business trainings and who I was talking to, early and aspiring coaches. So SheEO, the idea was born and was there, but in terms of the actual material, like, you know, week one business training video and week two, that was built in my first round as we went. So I would have the call with them, and I would have week one ready to go. And then in that next week, I would record and, uh, publish week two and then week three. So it was just released on a drip system so that they would watch one video per week, and that was it. So I built my, my program as we went for sixteen weeks, right? So you can build as you go. You don't need to build it before you sell it. Lie number eight: I need to start with free downloads or low-ticket offers before I can sell one-on-one high ticket, right? You have, like, this ladder in your head, but no, you don't. You actually-- I actually sold high ticket first. That was the first thing I sold. Sure, I started with a six hundred dollar six-week program, and ten girls signed up and loved that for me, but it also didn't replace my income, right? So my first ever high ticket after I invested into my business coach, where they taught me how to do it, I was able to sell it for thirty-nine hundred, where she paid me six fifty a month for six months So was I, quote-unquote, ready or experienced enough to, um, do that after my $600 six-week program? No. But that is where you can start. You can sell the high-ticket coaching, understanding the value and the energetic exchange that it provides for your client on the other side. You have to learn the art of sales, number one. Lie number nine, I need more testimonials in order to charge more. No, you are your strongest testimonial. After time, after experience, after clients work with you, of course, more testimonials, you know, the merrier. What? More testimonials the merrier. But you don't need that to start, right? You, your story, your A to B transformation, no testimonial will ever surpass that because that is the strongest testimonial. That's why you're a coach in the first place, right? That's what people love and want to know and trust about you is your own story. And so you just have to get really good and used to sharing your story and feeling so rooted and grounded in that, right, in, in integrity with that so that it translates. And I guarantee i- in enough time, there will be more testimonials to add to that. Lie number 10, final one, I need to hustle and overwork to make shit happen. Believe me, I thought that was the case. That's how I was groomed in my tech company, this masculine patriarchy, if you will. And maybe at times masculine energy is okay, and I definitely lean more heavily into my masculine when I need to get shit done, like right now. But as a woman and my feminine energy and embracing that a little bit more, especially now also as a mom, uh, I was forced to slow down, you know? And I'm building my business and maintaining my business during nap times and after 8:00 PM. So when I build the business I want to feel good and I want to go at my pace and I want to enjoy the process right now. I don't want to build it and then give myself permission to be happy. I get to be happy right now. So you don't need to hustle and overwork to make shit happen. Why not build something and have it feel good and have it feel fun and have it feel flowy, right? We get to build smarter, not harder. So be efficient in the time that you do dedicate to building your business. You don't need this all day, all or nothing type mindset and evenings and weekends and no, maybe there are seasons for that if you're in like a launch mode or whatever, but definitely not 24-7, 365 days of the year because I was in that and it's just simply not sustainable, right? If you're in your 20s or even early 30s and you don't have kids yet, or maybe you do have a kid, but you're thinking about two kids or like you already know this, it's not sustainable. If we're talking about wealth here and building something that means something and truly moving the needle and an impact on other women and leaving an imprint on this world well into your 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s. I mean, we got to think about how we work here and how we operate. Smarter, not harder. So one last thing, because it came up today in my mastermind call, I guess I'll say a bonus lie is I can't build a business because I'm a mom. So for any moms listening, this is for I hear a lot of moms or moms-to-be say, "I can't build a business because I'm a mom," or, "I can't do both." And I remember it was my biggest fear to become a mom because I'm so passionate about what I do and my business that I have. And although I already started my business before I became a mom, the lack of systems and broken processes were exposed when I had my daughter. My business was directly tied to my time and was reduced down to naps and post-bedtime hours. So that shook me up That shook me up a lot post-maternity leave when I was easing back into work. I was like, "Oh, no, like, my business is directly impacted if I am there or not." And while I'm so proud of what I've built up until this point and how I've built it, becoming a mom actually helped my business because I have become so much more efficient in the time that I do have now, right? What used to take me three hours now takes me 30 minutes, and so on. So yeah, motherhood is my number one priority, and it created this deeper, stronger purpose than I already had. And I think it's, you know, it's doubled because I also have a daughter, so I always look at life now through her eyes, and it's this lens of impact and continuing what I'm doing because it's for women, right? And then showing her from a very young woman's eyes what's possible and what we can do and what we're capable of. So building wealth was always the goal, but now it's generational wealth, right? Now I wanna move the needle forward not only for other women, but for her. And so I just have this really deep feeling that I'm supposed to be a mom. I love it so much, but, but I also, to be honest, mothering is the hard part, right? And now I feel like business is, quote-unquote, the easy part because if I can be a mom and raise a human, then I can absolutely build a business. And I just wanna say that and share that with other moms listening to this right now because I think oftentimes we are stuck in a victim mindset. And I know that's sometimes hard to hear even for myself because the mindset or the, the issues that are working against us from societal expectations, from lack of help, lack of support in the households, in the family unit, that, that's all stuff we have to learn, and that's all stuff that we need to heal, let alone just the physical body changes and healing that needs to happen, especially if you've had a vaginal birth or also C-section. Like, there's so much that the woman's body goes through on all levels, mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual. So there's a lot of healing that goes into it, and not everyone in your circle knows that. And so it's also for you to, one, realize what's going on. Two, then also share that, communicate that. Three, ask for the necessary help. So it is hard, and there is a lot that is working against you. And the archaic patriarchy way of building a business and what is taught to us, and hustle and don't stop, and work overtime and, you know, do whatever means necessary, and blah, blah, blah, climb the corporate ladder and overtime. That's just not going to work, right? And so I find something so liberating about that because I don't even want that, right? It's not sexy. It's not motivating. But I'm also realize I, I'm forced to figure something else out, right? Because admittedly, I probably would've still worked the way I used to work because I had success, and obviously then in my mind I'm like, "Well, that's the way I gotta do it." And so I'm, I'm choosing to view this motherhood chapter as such a beautiful opportunity for me to change my systems and to, um, fix my processes, and really make it this place, this hub where I get to support people and help people and collect emails and just make it easier for people to drop into my world without me being directly connected to it with my time. And so it is hard. It is challenging. I'm still in the thick of it right now, but I am choosing that mindset instead, right? Instead of believing, "Oh, I'm just, I can't do this. I'm a mom now. Like, that chapter's over. What's done is done." Like, no, I'm going to continue maintaining, serving my clients, building, creating, just at a different pace. At a pace that feels good and supportive of this season right now because for me, motherhood is my number one priority. So yes, I get to do both, but the way I was doing it has to radically change in order to make that happen. So that's all that I have for you today. I really hope one of these lies or all of the lies or some of the lies resonated with you. Like I said at the beginning, She-E-O is open. If you are craving mentorship, support, community of like-minded women who are doing the same thing as you and you wanna feel less alone and crazy and much more seen and understood, and that your dreams are not crazy and impossible, then I welcome you and I invite you into She-E-O. Click on the link in the show notes below to learn more. Feel free to DM me on Instagram with any questions you have. I'm always here to support you and never pressure you. I hope to see you inside and we'll talk soon