"The Hating Game: Are You Sure It's Not the Hunting Game?"

In this episode of 7 Years in Saudi, I dive deep into the emotion we all know too well—hatred. Is it really just about anger, or is there a deeper connection between love and hate? I share a personal experience of betrayal, where love turned into deep resentment, and the surprising truths I discovered along the way.

💔 Why do we often hate the people we once loved the most?
💔 How do we heal from the pain of being dismissed and betrayed?
💔 Can forgiveness free us from the emotional chains of resentment?

Join me as I explore the power of forgiveness and the path to emotional freedom. This episode is all about learning how to detox from hatred, let go of pain, and embrace love again—even after we’ve been hurt.

🔗 Listen now and start your emotional detox journey:

🌐 Website: Gem by Lamia
📺 YouTube: 7 Years in Saudi
📷 Instagram: @lamia_pabion
🎧 Podcast: 7 Years in Saudi

🙏 Let’s heal together and find our inner peace. 🙏
I love you all and thank you for your attention!
💙 Lamia Pabion - Certified Coach & Hypnotherapist

Episode One to a 7 years Journey in Saudi. this is the beginning to a story to whoever wants to know how I freed myself and to feel radiantly joyful. i am a mother, a coach, a hypnotherapist and I master the art of Reprogramming the subconscious mind.

Transcript

EPISODE 3/S2 : 

THE HATING GAME, are you sure it’s not the hunting game?

Salam 3alaykoum, bonjour

I am Lamia PABION, I am a coach hypnotherapist, 

I master the art of reprogramming the subconscious mind.

Welcome to my podcast 7 years in saudi

What is it about…i have one word for you: 

Emotions

After 7 years in this incredible country, I just landed into a new dimension of myself, that I was totally unaware of..

This podcast is about sharing my experience, a growth experience into perspective, that only Saudi Arabia could bring to my attention.

Today I wanna dig into the emotion hatred. A game that we all play named the hating game. No no, not the hunting game, although hatred implies that you got wounded. By someone and that someone you wish dead. Your reptilian self wants revenge…simply because he might strike again…so better protect yourself by wishing him to get the same torture. 

Why so? Is there a Connection Between Love and Hate?

Hatred is an emotion that, at its core, feels destructive. But when I truly reflected on the times I experienced hatred, I realized something unexpected: we only deeply hate the people we once deeply loved. These are the people who hold the key to our hearts, and when they betray or hurt us, the pain runs so deep that it transforms into hate. I experienced this firsthand when someone I trusted completely shattered that trust. The intense love I once felt turned into deep resentment, and I wondered how such a powerful bond could twist into something so dark.

At a very challenging time in my life—those moments when you feel like you're in the middle of the ocean, with a storm so intense, you see the gigantic waves and feel yourself drowning—I found myself asking for help. My old self hated asking for help. Now I understand the root of it: it is related to a betrayal wound… 

so I called one of my dearest loved ones, a family member I trusted with my whole heart. The kind of person you can tell your darkest secrets to, because they show love instead of judgment.

When I finally called, I was drowning, barely able to breathe, feeling like I was dying. But instead of receiving a lifeline, I was met with, “I told you! You got yourself into trouble. Checkmate, dear. You better pray because from what I see, Only a miracle can help you!”

I needed rescue and I got dismissed. 

At that moment, I understood what hatred really came from. It wasn’t about the lack of assistance—it was because my feelings were dismissed.

Can you imagine someone who is drowning, and you tell them, “Sir, you need to fill out a form at the reception first, and pay the tax at the financial office before we can consider your request?”

“I’m fucking drowning, you idiot, and you’re asking me to write you a letter?!”

It’s an emotion full of rage because you’re so deeply hurt, and no one seems to care about how you feel. You’re not even asking for help; you’re asking for empathy. For someone to relate to what you’re going through.

Because I wasn’t actually drowning physically. It is a metaphor. I was drowning because of an invisible pain. Something nobody can see unless they can put themselves in your shoes. Or would I say, putting themselves in my bathing suit. I know, it’s a bit corny.

In many cases, if you are drowning, and you miss the chance for being saved, you might die. I should have died, but then came a miracle named Hypnotherapy training. 

Can you imagine that the absolute irony was that The exact same person has been one of the only one who helped me years ago during another terrible experience. And she did, because she had faced the exact same pain—losing a child.

Hatred isn’t about the person you feel it toward. It’s about the pain you’re feeling that’s being denied. Hatred is like drowning in the ocean, surrounded by people you love, but none of them wants to acknowledge that you’re not safe. You need comfort, love, and support. it’s like going to the doctor and asking him to see your wound and you find out he is blind. He simply cannot see.

And I know we can only hate the people we love, because when someone you don’t care much about betrays you, you don’t feel anything toward them. You just want distance. They stop existing in your world. Ignoring is the opposite of love, but hatred? It’s just the other side of the same coin.

The root of this hatred, I came to understand, wasn’t in the act itself but in the vulnerability of love. When you let someone in—truly let them in—they hold a piece of you. When that piece is damaged or discarded, it’s as if a part of you is shattered. That’s why the people we love the most have the power to hurt us the most. In reality, we don’t hate them; we hate the reflection of ourselves that they betrayed.

As if betrayal would be only self betrayal. Go figure!

They say, forgiveness is the unconditional to that relief.

I tell you what, nowadays, with no practical tool, forgiving is like having a mortgage with a variable rate loan. For sure time will get to the bottom of it, but there are days you will feel it very heavy to carry on your budget. 

I got to understand that time will help yes to reaching forgiveness. 

But what if I don’t want to waste my time resenting, hating and morning into my pain. What if I want to focus on something else. What if it is your child? I need to find a way to heal that memory of pain.

This is it..at the end, it is a memory of pain. As a trauma. 

I need to erase the emotional memory. Symbolically. So my mind and most importantly my heart finds peace. 

Detoxing from hatred doesn’t mean forgetting or pretending it never happened. There’s a reason that person hurt you. They’re part of your journey, helping you understand that you’ve carried a wound in your subconscious. An emotional wound. One that, be sure of that,  they also have. So unless they clean up their own baggage, you can be sure they’ll hurt you again. So, buckle up and put some safety measures around your heart. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. And whoever it is.

Regaining your emotional freedom from the chains of resentment is about understanding that love, when pure, can still remain—even after betrayal. The hatred, in the end, is just the shadow of that love. And when we detox from it, we open ourselves up to love again, stronger and wiser.

Notice somehow, how quickly we manage to forgive our kids. 

Must be doing something with true love. At the end, when we really love someone, so profoundly, we always end up choosing to forgive.

A powerful window of hope

If we all get the chance to understand true love. Unconditional love. We might hit the target. All of us We might become “nelsons mandelas”

When there is hatred, it means there’s still love. You can love someone from afar. You can love someone so much that they begin to love themselves. Maybe that’s true love.

Maybe forgiveness is just about loving ourselves.

That’s my prayer for today. 

Amen 

I am lamia pabion. I am a certified coach and hypnotherpist. 

I will be happy to tell you another story in my next episode about my 7 years in saudi. My dearest saudi.

Thank you for your attention.

I Love you all,

Have a wonderful day.