Permission To Change

You can be proud of who you’ve been and still admit the old version of you doesn’t fit anymore. I’m talking about the quiet struggle many of us carry like feeling loyal to an identity that once kept us safe or valued, but now feels heavy. The reliable one, strong one or helper. When those labels start to pinch, it’s not a failure, it’s a sign of personal growth.

I reflect on what it looks like to give yourself permission to change without apologising for it. That includes redefining success away from achievement and recognition and towards balance, peace and a life that actually feels like yours. We explore people pleasing, energy protection and boundary setting, plus the fear that others will judge you for evolving. I share why needing approval can keep you stuck and how real love makes room for difference, even within close families living very different lives.

You’ll also get a set of gentle, practical reflection questions to help you name what you’ve outgrown and who you want to become next, no matter your stage of life. If this resonates, follow or subscribe to Everyday Warrior Moments, share it with someone who needs permission to evolve, and leave a review so more people can find these conversations.

Thanks for listening in!

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Music Credit: Cody Martin - Sunrise (first 26 episodes) then custom made for me.

Disclaimer: The views, opinions, experiences and stories shared by guests on the Everyday Warriors Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of the host, Trudie Marie, or the Everyday Warriors Podcast.

Guests are responsible for the accuracy of the information they choose to share and speak from their own personal experiences and perspectives. While every effort is made to provide a respectful and supportive platform for open conversation, the host accepts no responsibility or liability for the statements, opinions, advice, claims or recollections expressed by guests during a...

Transcript

A Quiet Moment To Pause

Trudie Marie 0:00

This is Everyday Warrior Moments. Thank you, truly, for being here and for choosing to subscribe and support the podcast. It means more than you probably realise and it allows me to keep creating these conversations and this space. This is a quieter moment between our guest episodes, a place to slow things down, to reflect and to take a breath. These episodes are just me, sharing thoughts, lessons, and gentle reminders as I continue to walk in my own journey too. So wherever you are right now, whether you're starting your day, ending it, or somewhere in between, let's take a few minutes together.

Giving Yourself Permission To Change

Trudie Marie 0:48

Hello and welcome back to Everyday Warrior Moments. Today I want to talk about something that I think many of us quietly struggle with, and that is giving ourselves permission to change. We often become attached to the version of ourselves that everyone knows, whether it's the reliable one, the strong one, the helper, the achiever, the fixer, the independent one. And over the time, those identities become really comfortable, and we act inside of those identities until one day they just don't fit anymore. But instead of embracing the change, we often apologize for who we're being. We worry that people won't understand or will wonder if they think we've changed. Well, I hope that they do, because I know I am not the same person I was five years ago. I'm not the same person I was 10 years ago, and I'm definitely not the same person I was 20 years ago. Because growth should change us, and experience should change us. If 10 years pass and we are exactly the same person, then we haven't really allowed life to teach us anything. I know over the years my priorities have changed, often with each decade and each stage of life that I'm at. Whether that was as a schoolgirl, whether that was as a young woman starting a family, whether that was as a single parent, and now as an empty nestle, I know that my life is not the same and I don't look at things the same way.

Redefining Success And Setting Boundaries

Trudie Marie 2:50

I know that younger Trudy measured success with a sense of achievement and recognition. But today I measure success so differently. I measure success by where I can find balance and peace in my life. I remember that once upon a time I used to say yes to everything. I was people pleasing, I was making sure I was recognized and I got things done and I could be reliable and the person counted on. But now I protect my energy and I enforce those personal boundaries. In the past, it was all about improving myself to everybody else, and now I just want to be myself regardless of what other people think. And I think one of the greatest gifts we can ever give to ourselves is just the permission to evolve with time, to outgrow old habits, old beliefs, definitely old expectations and old versions of ourselves. And to do this without guilt, without needing everybody else's approval, because I know there was a time in my life where I wondered what everybody else thought. I acted on what everybody else's opinion was of the idea or of me or what I should or shouldn't be doing.

Letting Go Of Needing Approval

Trudie Marie 4:32

But what I've come to realize now, turning 50, and at this later stage of my life, is we don't need the approval of everybody else. Because the people who truly love us will actually grow with us and they will allow us to be the truest version of ourselves, and they don't all have to agree. I know that I would consider my family to be real relatively close, but at the same time, I don't share the opinions necessarily of my three sisters. We all live vastly different lives, and not one of those lives is right or wrong, but we respect each other to live our best lives with what we have and to support one another in that journey, however that looks. I know even as my parents age and are dealing with stuff that again, I don't necessarily have to agree with their life choices, but I love them dearly for who they are and for what they've given me throughout my life. And as I sit back and reflect, I can learn how they have changed over their lives. If I look at it, my parents in their 20s, having four young girls, are not the same parents who in their 40s and 50s became grandparents or now in their 70s are living life on their terms. We all have the ability to grow and evolve. We just have to allow ourselves the choice to do that.

Questions To Find Your Next Self

Trudie Marie 6:20

So I'm going to ask you now, where have you outgrown a version of yourself? And are you being your authentic self? Could you be holding on to an identity that no longer serves you? And if so, what parts of that identity are you holding on to and why? Who do you want to become? Not who you've been, but who you want to be moving forward in whatever stage of life you're at. Because life isn't asking us to stay the same, it's inviting us to keep growing and evolving, and to trust that that is part of life's journey, and we can be whoever we want to be if we give ourselves permission to do so.

Breathe And Keep Rising

Trudie Marie 7:20

So now I want you to take a deep breath in and let it go. Come back to yourself and remember that everyday warriors don't give up. They continue to rise. Thank you for being part of the Everyday Warrior community and for supporting the podcast. It really means a lot. If something in this episode stayed with you, I invite you to share it a message, a post, a simple recommendation. It helps more people feel seen and supported. And don't forget the Everyday Warriors podcast is always there for deeper conversations and real stories from around the world. Take care and I'll see you again in the next moment.