How I Met Your Mother: Our Journey to Marriage

In this episode of the Defeat is Optional podcast, Ronnie and his wife Mikaela share their journey of faith, love, and family. They dive into how they met through a church, their dating story, and the role spirituality played in their relationship. The couple also discusses their five-year marriage, the birth of their energetic daughter Mayah, and how they’ve navigated various challenges, including remaining faithful before marriage. The episode highlights the importance of intentional dating, patience, forgiveness, and prioritizing family. Tune in for an intimate, heartfelt conversation that offers valuable insights for couples at any stage of their relationship.

00:00 Introduction to the Holy Spirit in Relationships
00:29 Welcome to the Podcast
00:38 Our Origin Story: How We Met
01:20 First Impressions and Early Interactions
02:05 The Role of Faith in Our Relationship
07:36 Building a Friendship Before Dating
11:33 Our First Date and Intentional Dating
14:07 Navigating Relationship Challenges
28:40 The Proposal and Engagement
30:28 Delayed Honeymoon and Marriage Reflections
30:54 Struggles and Restoration in Marriage
32:07 Overcoming Personal Battles
34:08 Family Planning and Unexpected Pregnancy
37:46 Pregnancy Reveal and Birth Story
43:20 Knowing Your Life Partner
48:55 Memorable Trips and Adventures
50:54 Marriage and Parenting Insights
56:23 Podcast Wrap-Up and Final Thoughts

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Transcript

Ronnie Baker 0:00

in every relationship, there's three people, especially in talking about biblically, spiritually. There's you, your spouse and the holy spirit. He says, that's how we treat the holy spirit. We ask them to be in our relationship and be in our marriage. And then the holy spirit starts going in places. That we don't want him to go. And so then we get upset about it. And it's no, this is the dirty, the deep, dark secret that I need to uncover for you so that you guys can really work on your marriage. Like you said, you wanted to, this is the stuff that needs to be aired out. What's going on everybody. This is that a feed is optional podcast. I've got my wife here, McKayla and we're going to be. Talking about our life together.

Mikaela Baker 0:38

Our origin story.

Ronnie Baker 0:40

Yeah, that too, basically how we met. How we believe God brought us together. And yeah, I think it's about time that I just introduced you guys to McKayla because we've been married for. Going on five years now.

Mikaela Baker 0:53

Five years in

Ronnie Baker 0:53

March 7th, 2020 is when we got married. So March 7th issue will be five years. It's been a roller coaster five years. We also have a child. Okay. I don't know. Saying child, kid. I've got a daughter.

Mikaela Baker 1:07

Very proper.

Ronnie Baker 1:08

We have a daughter, her name's Maya. And she is very rambunctious and lots of energy. Like way more energy than the average kid. 100%. I believe that

Mikaela Baker 1:20

I will take the fault for that one, because that was probably me as a child.

Ronnie Baker 1:24

Yeah. She looks like me. And she has McKayla's personality. That's pretty much how that goes. So it looks like me got the pointy ears and the big nose. Acts like McKayla. Cause I am chill. I am cool. I am calm. And Mikayla can be, but. She's not really. There's this one time we were at her apartment back when we were dating and she had this, was it a cross? That said be still. Yes. And every time and all the time Mikayla be doing something, it was fall over. I'd be like, yeah, that's God telling you to sit down somewhere. But anyway let's just get into the story. How about you start just, you start on, how. Where we first met, just go through the story.

Mikaela Baker 2:04

Okay. I feel like it's important before we start that to go back to how we both even found the place where we met. And it was. 2018 when we met. In April was when I started going to no. In February, I started going to this church and I was new to the church. And, it was really trying to make you friends. The church was brand new. I went on week two. Church plant, I'm excited. Everyone's young. Like we love Jesus. We're going to make friends like this going to be awesome. And in April. I met a guy named Miguel. Miguel was literally one of our best friends. He's awesome. But Miguel and I became friends and Miguel ended up meeting Ronnie the next month. So anyways, Miguel. I texted him one Sunday. I was like, Hey, I'm running a couple minutes late. Will you save me a seat? So Miguel saves me a seat. But he doesn't save me a seat right next to him. He literally saves me a seat at the end of the road from him, not even close to him. And I texted him or I got there and I was like, annoyed. I was like, bro, why? Like same, I don't know these people. I know you. I want to sit with you. And then lo and behold, there's this guy that he sat me next to. And I sent him a text during worship, which, whatever, but not as holy, but I sent him a text during worship. And I said, who did you sit me next to? I said, who is this man? In that man. Was Ronnie baker.

Ronnie Baker 3:27

Yeah.

Mikaela Baker 3:27

And I just thought he was the cutest thing and he had his eyes closed. His hands were up. He was worshiping Jesus. And I was literally like, oh my gosh, this is the kind of man I've been praying for Lord.

Ronnie Baker 3:38

So that's interesting because I, so how did I get to that place? So I was actually just coming out of a relationship. I would say. It wasn't terrible relationship, but it was toxic. Obviously I wasn't living. Right. So I wasn't getting my life together with Christ. it wasn't a good relationship. It wasn't a God honoring one. And so I was fed up. I was like, look. I'm done with relationships. I'm not getting a relationship like it's me and God. And crazy enough, I was still working out at TCU. Because I was a professional at the time. And I, there was a girl that worked as a GA at TCU, and she said, Hey, you should come to church. And meet some of my friends. So she invited me. And I met a guy named Covar shepherd. He's one of my really good friends now. And He was going to the church. He played basketball, TCU. I knew who he was, but I hadn't met him in person like formally. So she introduced us at the church that Monday. So church was on Sunday that Monday I went to a life group. With a bunch of guys from the church I met Miguel. At the life group.

Mikaela Baker 4:42

Maggie and I

Ronnie Baker 4:43

had on the Sean Weatherspoon. Nike's and we struggled with conversation. Me and Miguel. He loves shoes, clothes. And so I got his number. So then that next Sunday Covar is Hey, I'm not going to be able to make it to church. So I texted Miguel and said, Hey, Miguel, Can you save me a seat? So Miguel saved me a seat next to Miguel and put Mikael at the end of their row. That's how I got to that spot, but we were in completely different. Like I was like, I am. I'm not no relationships for me. Not doing it. I guess we're in a completely different spot because I felt like you. Yeah.

Mikaela Baker 5:19

I had just come off of. Almost a year of being single. And I had, I'd been in a longer relationship with my high school boyfriend and that obviously didn't work out. Praise the Lord. And I know. Praise the Lord. And anyways, so I was coming off of. Whenever we broke up. I told God, I was like, God, I won't date anybody for a year. I want to commit a year to growing my relationship with you. And I know. That's what

Ronnie Baker 5:47

I was on.

Mikaela Baker 5:48

And he was just starting that I didn't know that, but I was coming to the end of that. And so I had been praying in that year for my future husband and like talking to God about all the things that I wanted in my future husband. And so literally one month, 12 pops up and I meet you. I was like, Lord. Literally right now, like this thing ends in two weeks, but okay. I'm cool with it.

Ronnie Baker 6:09

What were some of the things that you're, that you were praying?

Mikaela Baker 6:12

I prayed that I would be able to find a man that loved the Lord, because for me, that's a huge priority. I grew up in a two-parent household. Pastor's kid. My parents are still married. There'll be married for. 38 years this year. So when they said I do and they did it, they said I do forever. They really meant it. And so for me, I was really just looking for someone that loved the Lord, because I realized that while my parents, they fought sometimes like humans do and people in relationships do when you love each other a lot. Sometimes you want to slug each other in the face a little bit do they never did that, it feels like that sometimes. Yeah. Someone who loved the Lord. It helped that you were very physically attractive. I'm not going to say that. I didn't ask God for a man that I thought was a beautiful man. And you definitely wear that. But I think. Obviously like that was the, those are the first couple of things that I saw about you. I noticed you were worshiping. And I was like, It seems like he's actively pursuing the Lord. Like you're, 20-something you're in church on a Sunday, a lot of 20 somethings don't go to church, especially like every Sunday. And we were, we were there every Sunday from setup to tear down to.

Ronnie Baker 7:18

Yeah, we. Literally

Mikaela Baker 7:19

every event. At

Ronnie Baker 7:20

that church. I've volunteered more at that church than I've ever volunteered my life. So I remember getting up. I remember getting for 5:00 AM going to church on Sunday, helping set up, put up chairs, TVs. So it was, yeah, I definitely served there a lot other than my butt off.

Mikaela Baker 7:36

I think too, once I got to know you and we, we became friends first. We were friends for almost a whole year before we started dating, which. I'm so thankful for, I think that was good for us because we got to know each other without the pressure of being in a relationship, which I feel like a lot of people don't get that it's like they meet someone. They hit it off even, and they go on a date soon after. And we were like, no, we're friends now. I would've gone on a date with you soon after, but I think that. 10 months that we had as just friends ended up being. A very special time for our relationship, because like I said, we didn't have the pressure of trying to impress each other in a relationship and like hiding all the bad things. Because you don't want the other person to think down on you. We are just authentically ourselves with each other. And so I got to see. Just how good of a friend you were and how much you love the people that were around you. And needless to say, I just fell more in love with you. Just as I got to know you more.

Ronnie Baker 8:26

Oh, so sweet.

Mikaela Baker 8:27

And that too.

Ronnie Baker 8:28

I know you do. I. I'm trying. I think about the time we were. So after that Sunday, Basically Miguel and Mikayla are pretty good friends. So they were, they hung out. Sometimes

Mikaela Baker 8:37

we had only met a month before, but we hit it off really well. He's a cool dude.

Ronnie Baker 8:41

So we all started hanging out together. So I would like I was still practicing at TCU. So when I would get out of practice, like Miguel worked at a pizza shop that was right across the street from TCU.

Mikaela Baker 8:57

And I was a junior or I was going into my senior year. So I

Ronnie Baker 9:01

was already out. I've been out for two years at the time. And Miguel worked at this place called pizza snob. Um, And so I would just go into pizza snob and I would literally just bring my computer. And I would do whatever work I had to do. And I would just hang out with, I wasn't hanging out with Miguel. Miguel was working, but like I was hanging out with Miguel. And he would feed me for free. So I eat a lot of free pizza. That year, so

Mikaela Baker 9:24

much free pizza that I started getting the salad. At a pizza shop. Which tells you something. I

Ronnie Baker 9:29

do remember that you started getting the salad. That's pretty crazy. Yeah. The sounds were good though.

Mikaela Baker 9:33

Those like candied peppers that they used, that they're on there. So good. They

Ronnie Baker 9:37

actually did hit. I'm not gonna lie. But what was it? What's a pizza called. It was Miguel worked. The Miguel was the best worker there. And he literally got a pizza named after him. I'm pretty sure. I don't know if the place closed down it might have, but I think that location has a pizza named Miguel. So if you're ever in Fort worth. And you're across the street from TCU and you go into a pizza snob. And they have the pizza.

Mikaela Baker 9:58

Then Miguel was so good. And Miguel,

Ronnie Baker 9:59

it is our friend is named after him. Okay. A lot of people loved it. But I think I got the spicy. Alfredo

Mikaela Baker 10:05

sauce on this.

Ronnie Baker 10:06

Alfredo sauce, a sausage pizza with the hot candy jalapenos. Waco chef's

Mikaela Baker 10:11

kiss.

Ronnie Baker 10:12

But yeah, we hung out there all the time. So McKayla would like in between classes, she would pop in there. I would study

Mikaela Baker 10:17

for all my tests at PCs. He

Ronnie Baker 10:18

literally spent so much time there. And then afterwards we would just Kick it we'd go like to Dallas. Stars games. I remember when I went to my first hockey game with him. And I remember we're in the top, like the top section. And first of all, there were no fights.

Mikaela Baker 10:32

Okay. Oh, there was one fight because there was one guy in the stands that said put them in a book. And we just kept yelling. One thing about me. I don't care if I'm in a nosebleed, I'm going to be there. Like I would rather be in a nosebleed and get to go to a game versus. Sit florists like floor seats, which you would prefer to do that. Rather never to

Ronnie Baker 10:53

be in the nosebleeds. Never. I don't like the nose, but if I, if I'm going to go to a game, especially cause I don't go all the time, I'm going to get some nice seats. I don't want to sit in the top. Riser I've done that before. It's just not as the experience is not as good. When I went to my first concert. I went to Jay Z concert, which is phenomenal when I was What middle school?

Mikaela Baker 11:15

I think you said no, I was high

Ronnie Baker 11:16

school. No. I was high school. And I remember being in the top and people are up there smoking weed and I'm like, bro, this is just not a good experience. Yeah, we actually went to say Jake, Paul, but that was after we were married, it was.

Mikaela Baker 11:25

I was nine months pregnant. Yeah.

Ronnie Baker 11:27

But anyway, we went to, we hung out a lot. And that was just the start of our friendship. I would say. And so then after about a year we started, we went on our first date. In March. Yeah, March. On the day we got married. So March 7th,

Mikaela Baker 11:42

2019,

Ronnie Baker 11:42

and we went somewhere really expensive. I went to a really nice steakhouse.

Mikaela Baker 11:46

I do want to say, I feel like this is important. To preface before we started dating. I liked Ronnie. Ronnie knew I liked Ronnie and

Ronnie Baker 11:55

well. Not the entire time.

Mikaela Baker 11:57

Not the entire time, but boys are dating. Like I think I finally in January was like, look, I like you, if you don't want to ask me out or do anything about it. That's cool, but I'm not going to get my hopes up and keep waiting. What did I do? I went on some other dates because I was like, as much as I like Ronnie, if he's not in a space where he's, open to that, then. I can't wait my whole life for him to be ready. And I think it took me going on. Two or three dates with nice guy. Ronnie came over to my door one day and was like, I feel like it's so dramatic in my mind, like you're banging on my door, knocking. It's raining and you're in your raincoat. And you're like, knocking. It's raining and you're in your raincoat. And you're like, you know, I like.

Ronnie Baker 12:37

Yeah, but I haven't gone on a couple of days myself oh, I didn't know this.

Mikaela Baker 12:41

Okay.

Ronnie Baker 12:41

I was yes you did. You definitely knew you knew about the dates I was going on. Yeah.

Mikaela Baker 12:47

Oh, you knew about. Yeah, I have to, I have lots of,

Ronnie Baker 12:50

not lots, but I had a couple of dates. So dang. I was, I think at the time I like. Okay. So I was getting my life right with Christ. I really wasn't living my life. Right. So I was dabbling eyes. Like I, I was in a space where I told myself I knew what I needed to do, but I was still denying those. I was denying the holy spirit at that point in my life. And I really wasn't like, I wasn't thinking about marriage. I really wasn't.

Mikaela Baker 13:14

And we were so opposite on that because I didn't want to date just to date. I wanted to date to get married.

Ronnie Baker 13:19

Yeah. And I had read, I had been going to church and I had some conversations with Covar. One of my buddies and a couple other people about just dating the book, like dating the proper way, because there's not really anything about dating in the Bible. But there is a lot of stuff about marriage and how you should go about it. And so I had to read a book called single dating, married, engaged, or engaged, married. So I was getting to that point where I was like, okay. I D I do want that. I just didn't know when I wanted it. But yeah. Either way. I was, I had gone on some dates as well. That just didn't really pan out in. At the time, me and McKayla hung out all the time. And so at that time, I don't think I. I don't, I can't say that I was like, I wasn't pursuing McKayla at the time. I did. I think she was attractive. Yes. But I was just like, I don't know, I just wasn't in, I was. We were not in the same Headspace. But then, she started going on these dates with this other guy, and I think it made me a little bit jealous. And I knew that she liked me enough to where if I had told her that I wanted to date her, that she would. To a dish, the other guy, so pretty much. That's what has exactly

Mikaela Baker 14:21

what happened?

Ronnie Baker 14:22

And yeah, so we started dating. We start dating after that?

Mikaela Baker 14:26

No, we started dating on March 7th, 2019, because I asked I'm saying,

Ronnie Baker 14:29

was it before after that? Was it, after that happened?

Mikaela Baker 14:33

Yeah, it. After that

Ronnie Baker 14:34

conversation. Okay.

Mikaela Baker 14:35

Yeah, because I was like, as soon as you told me you were interested. I let him know. I was like, Hey, this isn't going to work out. I'm sorry. And cause I said, hold on. I said, let me make sure that I end this before we go on a date, because I want to make sure that I'm just being totally upfront and honest.

Ronnie Baker 14:53

Yeah, so we, we went on date, went to a really nice steak house. We talked about. Really

Mikaela Baker 14:57

prices on the menu, which me. Sometimes what people call it cheapo. Like I do things. I like to save some money, which Ronnie will probably time.

Ronnie Baker 15:06

All the time.

Mikaela Baker 15:07

Except for at hobby lobby at target. He's every other place you'd like to see. At the

Ronnie Baker 15:11

time. But

Mikaela Baker 15:12

there were no prices on the menu. And I was like, panicking inside. I'm like, what am I supposed to get? Then he's get what you want. Yeah.

Ronnie Baker 15:19

So w I tell them what we talked about on our first day, because I feel like whenever you're dating, especially when you're dating intentionally. Um, there's certain things that you need to be talking about. If you're talking about dating intentionally and dating, what the purpose of getting married, which I feel like if you're. If you're not doing that, then you have to ask yourself, what are you doing? Because. From a biblical standpoint, One. You're not supposed to be having sex before marriage. And. The Bible says to flee from all sexual morality, which means. People make these skews of, yeah, I'm going to live with my girlfriend or boyfriend. And, there's nothing, there's not anything in the Bible that says you can't do that, but there, but what happens when you put a female and a male in one place for a long time, long periods of time, they stay together and sleep in the same bed. Things happen. And the Bible talks about fleeing from sexual morality running from that, and so putting yourself in play in spaces and places where that's not going to happen is keeping not only you save, it's keeping your soul safe because. Whenever you're in relations outside of marriage. What's happening is, um, you're developing all these soul ties with people. And it not only heard it not only hurts you, but it hurts the other person. So it's damaging your soul and you're sending against yourself. The Bible says. That D. Literally you sin against yourself. And It's just important that you do that properly. So for us, I know when we dated. McKayla never stayed at my house. We didn't have sex before marriage. And we did all the things correctly because what that allows you to do is. It takes your emotions out of it. And you can actually ask. Real questions you can. You can learn to let your guard down and be yourself. And you don't get emotions mixed up because once you get emotions mixed up, up into it. It's really hard that if somebody, if there's red flags in the other person, you're going to turn green. Yeah. Alternate all turn green. That's exactly what happens. Or they're like yellow oh yeah, he did that. But it's okay. It's not a big deal when it really is a huge deal. Like it's a big deal to deal Barker. And yeah, that's one of the reasons. And it also is just. Again, People think that, being. Abstinent. Or whatever, celebrate the afternoon. What's the word? Sure. Or before marriage. Is has God taking this away from me? Like the things that God. Puts in the word are to protect you. At all times. Even in the garden of Eden, like he gave them freedom to everything except for, from one tree. And it wasn't that he, it wasn't, that guy was like, oh, you can't eat from this because I'm, I'm putting restrictions on your limitations. It was literally to protect them from themselves. And so that's what God does. He puts boundaries so that we can protect ourselves from ourselves. Yeah. But yeah. What do we talk about on that first day? What were, what are some of the questions that you should probably that, what are some of the questions that if you're dating intentionally, you should ask someone. On a first date without getting too like, deep into it, but I

Mikaela Baker 18:14

can go deep, deep, Yeah.

Ronnie Baker 18:16

So what are some questions that you would ask or what are some questions that we talked about?

Mikaela Baker 18:19

I remember one thing you asked me that. I feel like nobody had asked me before that made me really think was where do you see yourself in five years? And that wasn't just like a job. I told you, I was like, I'll be a PA like this. And you were like, no, but where do you see yourself in five years? Like your life, like outside of a job, what do you want to be doing? And I said I at that time, my plan was to go to PA school. And so I wanted to. Have a very successful career, but I also wanted to have a family and I wanted to be married. I said, I felt like in five years I'll be married and I'll have at least one or two kids. And, my career will be booming. Two out of the three. We're married. We have a kid. Ended up obviously not going to PA school, but for me. I didn't. That's a whole nother story, but I chose family over. Career in that sense, because I realized if I was going down that path, it wasn't going to see my husband and my future children at the time. As much as I wanted to. And so I prioritized that because for me, that is the priority. Another question you asked was, how many kids do you want? And we talked about. Our family upbringings and Things, we didn't go super deep into it on our first date, because we had already talked about some of our upbringing. Yeah. Before then just because we were friends for so long before. I remember talk just getting to know. I feel like when you're dating, versus even when your friends, especially on the first day with us, we knew that. If we were going on this date, it was either going to end in marriage or it potentially could end our friendship. And for me, I was willing to take that risk because I saw so many great things in you. And I could see a future with you just as my friend. But going back. Um,

Ronnie Baker 20:01

You were talking about

Mikaela Baker 20:02

that's how my brain works.

Ronnie Baker 20:03

You already talking about. You were talking to him about choosing a family over your career. Et cetera.

Mikaela Baker 20:10

But either way. In this up

Ronnie Baker 20:11

either way. What I would say, what I'll say is that. Oh,

Mikaela Baker 20:15

Here I am.

Ronnie Baker 20:16

Yeah, go ahead.

Mikaela Baker 20:17

When you're dating someone versus when you're just friends with someone. Even if you're intentional with your friendship, I feel like dating takes it to a whole nother level because then you're looking at the person through the lens of. Is this someone I want to marry? Is this someone that I want to raise a family with? Like for me, I looked at you and I was like, would he be a good dad to our future children? And obviously the answer to that was yes, because not only are you picking your person, you're picking your kid's parents, which is,

Ronnie Baker 20:43

and you're picking your in-laws.

Mikaela Baker 20:44

Yeah. That too.

Ronnie Baker 20:46

My in-laws are great. Aye man, amazing people. So I have no complaints. But anyway, those are good questions. Like maybe. So we talked about kids on the first date. Maybe if you're dating, we

Mikaela Baker 20:59

wanted for ma. Yeah.

Ronnie Baker 21:00

We're not having four. I'm telling you that right now.

Mikaela Baker 21:02

Nope.

Ronnie Baker 21:02

And unless we have some,

Mikaela Baker 21:04

unless we have triplets. And they said that would be the word.

Ronnie Baker 21:07

We have some crazy. Mary berth, where there's just a kid that pops out of nowhere. We're probably not going to have four. But y'all pray for us. We're trying for a boy next. Okay. You just need a boy. And we can. Just put those to the

Mikaela Baker 21:19

Lord.

Ronnie Baker 21:20

All right. McKayla is currently reading a book on how to have a boy.

Mikaela Baker 21:23

No it's called how to choose the sex of your baby. She's

Ronnie Baker 21:26

reading a book on how to have a boy. People think that's

Mikaela Baker 21:30

woo, but I'm a geek. And I love like studying anything that has to do with, family planning or natural wellness. And it's oh, there's like a natural way that you can increase your. We're going to talk about, we're going to talk

Ronnie Baker 21:41

about that, but anyway. Okay. So dating, I think that's it asking about kids is a good question to ask maybe for your new Probably not the first date that might freak somebody out. Like how many kids you want to have. I was like, dang, bro, can we like eat dinner first? But I think that some good questions. Would be two. Ask about there, like you said, their upbringing, their childhood. And. I think that when you're talking about that stuff, if you're willing to get vulnerable first. Then the other person will open up because there's a lot of times that, you know, you tip toe and you don't really want to open up about. You're passing that not on the first day. Do you have to tell them like all the grueling details, but I think there's probably some small things that could be opened up about or N so that's one thing talking about your childhood. Talk about your relationship with Christ. How did you come to know Christ? Maybe how you found the church. That or if you guys are both going to the same church or if they, if you guys don't, if you don't go to the same church, ask them if they go to church regularly. A hundred

Mikaela Baker 22:37

percent.

Ronnie Baker 22:37

How's our relationship with Christ? How did they come to salvation? All those things are really important. Past relationships. You can ask about those. Like you have to be really intentional. Again, I asked McKayla, like, where do you want to be in five years? And that's not just from a career standpoint I don't know. I don't want to know what you're going to be work. Are you going to be doing for work for five years? Because that's great, if we're going to be in a relationship together, Then. Work is going to be work, but what are we going to do? How are, what's going to our life going to look like. Yeah, I think that those are really just good questions to ask because you can't. Like the questions about, what's your favorite food and what's your favorite color and what do you like to do on the weekends? Like those are great things. To ask, but they're so they're very surface level and

Mikaela Baker 23:20

they also change over time. Change

Ronnie Baker 23:22

when we were just

Mikaela Baker 23:23

starting to date, it's like, what do you want to do on the weekends? I want to go out. I want to hang out with friends. I want to do this. And now it's I would love to just do nothing and kick back and watch some sports and door dash and food and not have to cook.

Ronnie Baker 23:35

Yeah, it changes. And especially when you have a kid that changes. But yeah, so those are good things to know it's going to have similarities. But I think that if you get clarity on the deeper things I think you'll have a better chance of really knowing if that's someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with again, because what you're going to do in your twenties is going to change from what you like to do in your thirties is going to change from what you like to do in your forties. Obviously I'm not 40 yet, but I'm sure it will change. And yeah.

Mikaela Baker 24:00

Sorry,

Ronnie Baker 24:00

go ahead.

Mikaela Baker 24:01

I think another thing that would be good to talk about on a first date are your morals, especially if it's someone that you don't know, like I knew you before our first date, but talk about your morals and talk about I'm not saying don't get political, but talk about the things that matter to you.

Ronnie Baker 24:15

Ask them. You

Mikaela Baker 24:15

can't get political because in reality, the way you vote does. Reveal your morals a little bit. But talk about those things because you don't want to get into a serious relationship with someone. And personally, I wouldn't want to get into a serious relationship with someone. If we completely disagreed on major moral issues. I'm not saying that's End all be all because God can work on your hearts and like, guide you towards the biblical view of how things should be. But. I definitely think for me, if we didn't agree on some of those things, it probably would've been a deal breaker.

Ronnie Baker 24:47

Yeah. And if you are married and you didn't, and you don't agree on things, then. That's a, it's not always the worst thing in the world. Because we were just had a marriage we're at a marriage conference this past weekend. And the guy on stage told a story. He said we had our, we had some of our friends over a couple Adam over to our house. And we told them before they came, they were coming on a Friday. He said, Hey, we have an event we have to do Friday night. We have a wedding we have to go to, but you guys can, we'll give you the guys, the keys to the house. You come in the house, make yourself at home, do whatever you want. our house is your house. And then when we come back, we'll go out to dinner that night. And, we'll have a good time. So they go to the wedding. The couple that's hosting this other family. They go that wedding. They make their quick appearances. They leave, they go back home. When they get home. They go into the guest room and the couple that's supposed to be staying with them, their friends, they're not there. So then they go to the other room. They're not there either. So huh? Where they're at the key there, the keys, the car is still here. So he says they go to their bed, their bedroom, their personal bedroom. And he's there they are. And he's The guy he's like rummaging through all my files, looking at my taxes. And he said his wife is in the drawer, looking at my wife's lingerie.

Mikaela Baker 26:01

The way my jaw dropped.

Ronnie Baker 26:03

And he walks in and he says, What are you guys doing? And the guy goes you said, make yourself at home. So I was just seeing what you made this year. He's dang, I didn't know you made this much money. And so then he looks over at the guy's wife. Jeez like this. This pair of lingerie is really nice. Where'd you get it from? So they're all baffled and he said, Mortified. It's like it would have been the world war three.

Mikaela Baker 26:26

If we came in and they were in our room. Go into our taxes and lingerie

Ronnie Baker 26:31

crazy, but he said, in every relationship, there's three people, especially in talking about biblically, spiritually. There's you, your spouse and the holy spirit. He says, that's how we treat the holy spirit. Sometimes we tell them to come into our house. We told them to come into our relationship. We ask them to be in our relationship and be in our marriage. And then the holy spirit starts going in places. That we don't want him to go. And so then we get upset about it. And it's no, this is the dirty, the deep, dark secret that I need to uncover for you so that you guys can really work on your marriage. Like you said, you wanted to, this is the stuff that needs to be aired out. And so

Mikaela Baker 27:06

even though that didn't actually happen,

Ronnie Baker 27:07

that did not actually happen. The story had to

Mikaela Baker 27:10

clarify that because that went over my head. I was like, those people are crazy.

Ronnie Baker 27:14

Yeah.

Mikaela Baker 27:14

But that's literally what we say yeah. Holy spirit, come in my life. Like I want you in every part of it. And then. He comes in and you're like, Hey, what are you doing? That's a little personal.

Ronnie Baker 27:25

Yeah. So if you're married. And there are differences like that, then, Just invite the holy spirit in because the holy spirit will correct. Correct your heart. But anyway, Those are good questions to ask them. First day we started dating. We dated for. From March until November. And by November we were in a, we did a CA. What does it, marriage counseling with our church.

Mikaela Baker 27:45

Premarital counseling for seriously dating or engaged couples. And we were seriously dating.

Ronnie Baker 27:50

So we did that. And. Before that even ended because it was like an eight or 12 week thing. Weeks eight weeks. Which I would highly recommend. To do that and to go do it with a church. Before, before you even engaged. Yeah. Go do that because they'll really get into Then ask yourself, how do you want to spend holidays? You get into.

Mikaela Baker 28:09

Money

Ronnie Baker 28:10

management, how who's going to manage the money, how many kids are going to have They get into the details of that stuff. And it really helps you to understand the person that you're dealing, like not dealing with the dating. Yeah. Seriously helped

Mikaela Baker 28:21

us. I feel like we were very intentional in our dating and asking each other, like the deeper questions and not just like skirting around it, but I do think that. The merge really did. Bring to light some things that we hadn't thought about, not bad things, but just things that we hadn't thought about yet that it was good to have a conversation about before marriage.

Ronnie Baker 28:38

Yeah. So we did we did that. We basically knew in November that, we're going to get married. And I got a ring. I told him in Kayla Hey, get your nails done with basically at this point, she's great. Let's just get, let's just propose because we know that. That's

Mikaela Baker 28:50

been done for two months. I was ready.

Ronnie Baker 28:53

So anyway. Went to the water gardens of Fort worth proposed were engaged, went on. Nice little dinner that night. And.

Mikaela Baker 29:00

He took my dad to the airport.

Ronnie Baker 29:02

I was just about to get to that. Sorry, go ahead. Go ahead. Took her dad to the airport and. I asked him for McKayla's Hannah marriage. And He was, he was ecstatic about it. He was like, of course, But even what, before that we actually have broken up. Some McKayla and eyeball Mikayla, and I broke up. And Just just the backstory to this I would have was meeting with the pastor of the church at this time. And he just told me that I probably shouldn't date McKayla. And I was like, this is my pastor. I was like, Okay. Some backstory there. I broke up with Mikayla and she wasn't very happy about it. No. She said she cried in her rice at Chili's.

Mikaela Baker 29:41

No, I cried my fake eyelashes off in the parking lot at Chili's. With my mom, my dad, and ended up being the man that married us. Yeah.

Ronnie Baker 29:49

Yeah, long story. We'll go into the details of that. It was rough, but anyway, it all worked out in the end. So

Mikaela Baker 29:55

that was like the hardest for I'm not even kidding. I was. Some of the hardest four days of my life. And I don't even say that as a joke.

Ronnie Baker 30:01

Yeah. So it was

Mikaela Baker 30:02

rough.

Ronnie Baker 30:02

We got got engaged in November and then we got married. We decided, Hey, we want a quick marriage. We're going to get married. We got married on. A year from the day that we started dating. So on March 7th, a year later, So 20, 19 to 2020. And that was actually right before COVID. So we literally got, I came back from overseas. And we got married like a week or two later.

Mikaela Baker 30:23

Yeah.

Ronnie Baker 30:24

A week or two later. Like literally a week before the world shut down. And that was a wedding. We didn't go on our honeymoon until three years later. Because of just COVID and everything.

Mikaela Baker 30:33

And the Olympics and yeah.

Ronnie Baker 30:35

Olympics and traveling and all that stuff. So we just didn't go. But yeah, we were married.

Mikaela Baker 30:40

Yay.

Ronnie Baker 30:41

That was the culmination of. Us being us, meeting, how we met the, got to meeting, then. Dating. Breaking up. Getting back together, engaged, married,

Mikaela Baker 30:52

I will say. So we've

Ronnie Baker 30:53

been married for five years now.

Mikaela Baker 30:54

Three and a half month engagement we had was the best decision doing a quick engagement.'cause I feel like when you are pursuing the Lord together and we weren't having sex before we were married. Temptation does become stronger when you have the ring on your finger. And you're like, this is who I'm spending my life with. So temptation did get harder, but. I feel like we've talked about this too in marriage. I feel like God restored so much through our marriage in that front. Just to get a little bit deep when I was younger. Some things happened to me that weren't in my control and I feel like. For a long time. It's not that I was worried that God couldn't restore that, but I just. Didn't necessarily have as much hope, which sounds so sad, but. When we got married and you were just very, even intentional with me in that regard. It restored so much for me. And so even though, Leading up to marriage. Was I perfect? Nope. But God restored so much through our marriage in that front. And from the things that I walked through when I was younger, like I said, that I couldn't control. To where we're at now. I feel like that. Wound that I had for so long was healed because of our relationship and what God did in that.

Ronnie Baker 32:07

Yeah. I feel like a big a pool for me too. Cause I've talked about this. On previous podcasts is just my addiction to pornography and lust. And I think that the marriage was. Not that I didn't struggle with it and try to get rid of it on my own before I was married. But I think that when I got married, it really. Was a catalyst for me of Hey, look, I can't be really, I can't deal with this. And be in a covenant relationship. I'm not saying that it was the main thing that pushed me, but it was a big part of it. And also if you are struggling with that, I would definitely. First of all. I would figure that out before you get married. That's my advice to you a hundred percent. Yeah. And also, maybe even talking to the person that you're dating intentionally about Hey, I do struggle with this because one is going to it's fair for them to know that. And then to if they feel like that's something that they want to walk. With youth. Walk through walk with you through. Then great. And if not, then. You need to go fix that before you continue to date. Personally, So once

Mikaela Baker 33:08

you're married. It's not only your battle. It is y'all's battles together. Yeah. I think that's fair to tell them beforehand,

Ronnie Baker 33:15

for sure.

Mikaela Baker 33:16

And to that Gigi. Be something that not saying like it was a deal breaker with them, but like y'all. You're not being willing to work with someone else through it might just reveal Hey, we're not right for each other and that's okay. You're not married. So it's okay.

Ronnie Baker 33:30

Yes. Yes. Yeah. I'm married, so it's okay.

Mikaela Baker 33:33

If you are engaged. Even if you're

Ronnie Baker 33:35

you're not you're been planning a wedding and it's not working out then. You're making a decision for life.

Mikaela Baker 33:40

Yup. One of my uncles was engaged before he married my aunt. And they called off the engagement and him and my aunt have been together probably for 40 plus years. Now

Ronnie Baker 33:49

it's better to do that than it is to probably get in. Not probably it's better to do that. And then to get into marriage and then get a divorce. Okay. Divorces cost a lot in there. I'm sure they're emotionally damaging. Like tremendously. Because you're breaking a covenant with Christ. Anyway, Um, yeah. Got married in 2020. Now we talked about, we have a kid, we have a daughter Maya she's about 17 months now. We waited three years before we had our first child we were going to do too, but I needed an extra year.

Mikaela Baker 34:20

That was perfectly fine. We waited

Ronnie Baker 34:22

an extra year. And the whole story behind how this happened. Was that. We were planning on having a kid in 23, 28. 20 23, 20 23. And so we're trying to map it out to where the world championship that year was in August. I didn't even go because I didn't make the team, but it was in August. So we were trying to plan it around that. So Hey, we can't have the, we can't start trying to conceive this baby. At this month, because then nine months later, I'm going to be. In Europe and then the baby is going to come. I'm going to miss the birth and all this stuff.

Mikaela Baker 34:54

We were trying to wait until like February, March. We're

Ronnie Baker 34:56

trying to wait till February, March, because nine months later, it's after season, we're chilling. Have the baby I'll be at home. But McKayla. Decides she's going to listen to this new podcast. And it's the Alex Clark podcast, whatever it's called. What is it called? It was

Mikaela Baker 35:09

called the spillover. Cultural Apothic.

Ronnie Baker 35:11

She starts listening to this podcast. Guest, someone recommended it. And it was about birth control.

Mikaela Baker 35:15

No, I'm pretty sure I got targeted with an ad. I'm a marketer's dream.

Ronnie Baker 35:18

So you got targeted, whatever it doesn't matter. You will listen to this episode. Of Albert's control and she was just like, Ronnie, I need to get off birth control. It's ruining my body is killing me. This is just terrible. I'm dying right now. And I'm like, okay. Can you just take it for it? Cause this is we're in November. We're waiting till February. It's only like literally two months, like maybe two and a half months where Can you just wait until then, because then that's like perfect timing. You get off in February. Like you've been taking it for the last 18 years or whatever. I was like 18, G 10, whatever. I'm exaggerating, but 10 years I'm like, why can't you just wait? She's no, I have to do it now. I have to get off it now. I'm like, I'm trying to convince her. Just wait.

Mikaela Baker 36:01

I said, look, the reality is. It could take up to a year, like coming off birth control, like your hormones are crazy. It likely won't happen fast. So let me just come off, let me just try to balance my hormones. Take my supplements, take my vitamins. Get that right. So that when it does come time to conceive, like my body will be healthy.

Ronnie Baker 36:19

Yeah. So I was trying to convince her not to do it. She did anyway. It's not that she didn't G we talked about. I told her like, Do you really want to say yes. I said, okay, fine. I was going to make a joke there, but I don't even know what you're going to say, but anyway no, so she decided that's what she wanted to do. So that was fine. So literally I want to say about, I

Mikaela Baker 36:39

know what you're going to say. Two weeks

Ronnie Baker 36:40

later. Two weeks. Two weeks. Two weeks. I'm pretty sure. That's when we like that's when Mikayla found out she was pregnant now.

Mikaela Baker 36:49

No, that's when we can see.

Ronnie Baker 36:51

Okay. We can see. But she didn't. We didn't think she was pregnant. Because we're being safe, she's mantra cycle, like all this stuff. But Mikayla was taking her temperature every year.

Mikaela Baker 36:59

Every yeah, every morning. Sorry. Temperature.

Ronnie Baker 37:01

And first

Mikaela Baker 37:02

thing, when you wake up and, it shows if you have one degree increase, like over a period of a couple of days, either you're ovulating or that could be like you're potentially pregnant. And go ahead.

Ronnie Baker 37:11

Yeah, no. So you realized that it was off. I was like, oh one day. It's

Mikaela Baker 37:15

like a little high, like just, it was like a degree.

Ronnie Baker 37:18

Yeah, I do agree. So it's not crazy.

Mikaela Baker 37:20

Yeah.

Ronnie Baker 37:21

But anyway, that day goes by. I'm going to bed like normally do. I'm like I'm getting I'm going asleep. I gotta get some rest.

Mikaela Baker 37:27

I was, I had finished up my first week of training for my ultra marathon. Oh yeah.

Ronnie Baker 37:31

She was trying for ultra marathon.

Mikaela Baker 37:32

Miles' the day before felt great. Who runs 12 miles. The first week of training, I was like, I'm in shape. I'm good. I'm going to kick this ultra marathon in the button February.

Ronnie Baker 37:42

Yeah. So she starts training for that. I go to sleep then what were you doing after that?

Mikaela Baker 37:46

So before he went to sleep, I was like, I had a test. I was like, let me just take a test and I didn't follow the instructions on, how the it's like. If you've ever taken a pregnancy test, there's like instructions. You follow up. I just like Willy nilly, that thing didn't follow the instructions. I was like, I'm not pregnant. So it doesn't matter. And then the two lines popped up and I was like, oh my God. Oh my God. What is happening right now? I was like, it's probably just cause I took the test wrong. So we had another one. I don't know why I had multiple, but I had multiple. So I went and took another one. And immediately, there were two people that I texted immediately. One was JC Kovars wife. And we had always said, like, whenever I found out I'm pregnant, like we're going to do a photo shoot to surprise Ronnie. So I texted JC and I just said, You ready for that photo shoot. And she knew exactly what I meant. And then the other person I texted, it was Jayden and I literally it's 10:00 PM. And I said, Jayden, can you call me please? Because Jayden was my, one of my only friends at the time that had a kid. And I was like, can you call me? And so her and Jeremy are in the car driving down the road. She calls me, she's oh my God, you're pregnant. Aren't you. And I just laughed so hard. Cause I was like, I don't know what to do. Ronnie's about to go to sleep. I think I need to let him get one more night of sleep before I tell him like, just let it be peaceful. And then I'll tell him tomorrow because I did the math in my head in and I was like, Oh crap. Yeah.

Ronnie Baker 39:04

Let's figure this out. Guess when our due date is. Yeah.

Mikaela Baker 39:08

The day of the world championship. August

Ronnie Baker 39:11

18th. It was going to be literally, I was going to be, yeah. If I made the team, I was going to be in competed while I was gonna be in the final. The day that you're supposed to be born. Yeah. You let the night go by.

Mikaela Baker 39:21

I let him have a good night of sleep. The

Ronnie Baker 39:23

next day, she's Hey, JC is going to come over and do some photos. Cause she's trying to get some new photos for like her Christmas. Shoots or whatever. Yeah. And I'm like, cool. Like it's not a big deal.

Mikaela Baker 39:32

We had done photos with her before she was a photographer in Fort worth Dallas Fort worth. Amazing.

Ronnie Baker 39:37

Yeah. She kept asking me is a coal JC. I'm like, yeah, I don't care. She's taken photos of us before. Like just whatever, let her come over. We're in the.

Mikaela Baker 39:46

Sure like you were gonna get your hair did and make sure you were already.

Ronnie Baker 39:50

I didn't do anything extra. I put on those pajamas. She has some pajamas. We put on the pajamas that were all matching for Christmas that year. And they, she gave us some fake presents to open up. We're sitting there on the, in front of their tree. First we like did this. We tell each other, we danced a little bit. She took some photos and she's like, all right, let's open the gifts. And then we'll be done. Mikayla opens her gift up. It's it's just a bag with. Some toilet paper and it just to act there was something in there and then McKayla gives me this little box and I might call, okay. So I'm opening it, thinking like it's going to be, something stupid, like toilet paper in it. And there's this small onesy. And I was like, At first, I was just like, oh, this is interesting Christmas.

Mikaela Baker 40:28

Christmas pajamas. You said you thought it was something for Chevy to wherever. I

Ronnie Baker 40:32

thought that I, so I didn't even think anything of it at first, anything. I was just like, oh, it's the one thing then I was like, oh my gosh, JC is telling us that she's pregnant. So I thought he was telling us because I thought, McKayla is not in on it and she's here to take photos. So she brought, she's the one that brought the box. So I was like, oh, she's telling us like, Hey, she's. She's pregnant.

Mikaela Baker 40:53

I was like, oh, yay.

Ronnie Baker 40:55

But then I realized like Mikayla looked at me and she starts crying. So I'm like

Mikaela Baker 40:58

there was a pregnancy test. Yeah. There was a.

Ronnie Baker 41:00

and yeah, then. I

Mikaela Baker 41:01

looked at JC first. Like

Ronnie Baker 41:02

I looked at her and then I looked at you and then I was like, Oh, the word were pregnant. So yeah, it was like, it was a shock. But she got all that stuff done in a day. So like she went to what'd you go to old Navy to find the. I literally

Mikaela Baker 41:15

had to drive across the metroplex to find the only one, the in-stock that would fit Maya, the following Christmas. Cause I was like, I'm not about to spend money just for this photo shoot. Like it has to be practical, me being. Cheap again. But I, the only three to six months size onesy was like all the way across the metroplex drove like 40 minutes each way to go get this onesy. That day.

Ronnie Baker 41:37

Yeah.

Mikaela Baker 41:38

To get that done.

Ronnie Baker 41:39

Yeah. Yeah. So that happened. And

Mikaela Baker 41:41

I went and bought the cute little box that it was in, got the bag that it was in. We

Ronnie Baker 41:45

still have the box.

Mikaela Baker 41:46

I will never get rid of that box. It will

Ronnie Baker 41:48

still get out of the box forever. So yeah, we had my

Mikaela Baker 41:50

pregnant like July and then that box. We'll be waiting for you. And you're like, yep, no, it's in there.

Ronnie Baker 41:54

We had my 10 days after the 18. So the 28th which would actually have been the last day, I think, of the actual world.

Mikaela Baker 42:03

Yeah. Yeah, it was literally

Ronnie Baker 42:04

the last, they would've been the one that

Mikaela Baker 42:05

really would have finished.

Ronnie Baker 42:06

Yeah. So I wouldn't have made it home, but either way.

Mikaela Baker 42:10

It's been a pregnancy I planned on. Just planned on you not being there and hired an amazing birth team that we had the baby

Ronnie Baker 42:17

at the, at our house in a bathtub.

Mikaela Baker 42:20

And whose fault was that?

Ronnie Baker 42:21

Whoa, hold

Mikaela Baker 42:22

on. They never told

Ronnie Baker 42:24

me when it was time. They kept saying, yo, you can wait. And then, they went to go check the out. Dilated you were, and you were way past the thing. And I was too late. It was, I wasn't going to get it blown up in time.

Mikaela Baker 42:36

I told you all like 5:00 PM. I think it's time.

Ronnie Baker 42:39

But anyway. We did a natural birth. Shout out to McKayla because the amount of pain that she was in, it was probably ridiculous. Obviously I'll never know. But you're

Mikaela Baker 42:48

blessed.

Ronnie Baker 42:49

Yeah, Maya's healthy. She's energetic. She's loud. And she never sits down at first. She never sits still. And unless she's watching. Mona or drinking milk. That's it. And we try not to let her watch Milana too often. So that means she's running around all the time.

Mikaela Baker 43:05

And she's running around asking for marijuana music. And she loves this

Ronnie Baker 43:09

But anyway, yeah, I've seen the movie. Probably like 50 times now, but anyway yeah, so that's our life just to run a kind of wrap it up, but just to backtrack a little bit. Cause I feel like everyone always asks. How did you know. That you found that your personal life, how do you know that people ask me how'd you know, that she was the one, right? My question to you is how did you know. How did you know that I was the person that you're supposed to marry? We're going to marry.

Mikaela Baker 43:34

I think, we've talked about this before and I'm dead serious. When I say this. If you would have proposed, when we were friends, I would have probably married you, like I would have said yes in marriage. How. Did

Ronnie Baker 43:43

you know that. How'd, you know, so soon you

Mikaela Baker 43:45

think. I think part of it was I had that time. Of singleness. And literally coincidentally meeting you at the very end of that was like, Huh. That could be something. But I also think that you brought so much peace to my life and I feel like you complimented me in. The areas that I was lacking in and I feel even just in our dating, you were very intentional with Pursuing me and pursuing your relationship with the Lord first. And I just appreciated that about you. There were, You literally checked off everything that I wanted in a man, everything that I could have, everything in more. That I could've asked for. Cool. So yeah, those are just a few things.

Ronnie Baker 44:23

Yeah. So for me, I didn't have a list. At one of the things that, one of the things that keep me into really knowing that McKayla was gonna be my wife. Because again, guys, I wasn't looking, I wasn't like trying to get married. I didn't know when I wanted to get married at that point. But, because I've been in charge and I had to have conversations with people about marriage and just, I was doing, making some steps to do the right things as far as. Spiritually. Purging myself from sin, turning away repenting. And one of the things that Mikayla prayed for me, like Every night,

Mikaela Baker 44:54

I would literally go to the track.

Ronnie Baker 44:57

That's literally what I was getting to. So McKayla told me this story. She said. This was actually the night before we got married. We had our rehearsal dinner. We did the dinner with everybody. She gave me this book. And it was a journal and it had its like super thick. Way thicker than it is. Bye. Broke the binding, but it has a bunch of pictures in it of us. It has her she's literally journaled in it. Like for a year, I guess the whole time we were dating. And she don't journal every day. All the pictures and everything. 2019, I was injured. I was hurt. I was dealing with a hamstring and an addict or injury. And, I was literally like up and down all the time because I was like having good practices and I'd have to sit out for two, two days. It was just up and down. It was just a rough time. And we're, we had started. Dating at that time. So McKayla every day I would practice at like 10 or 11 o'clock. She would go to the track and she would walk around the track and she would pray for me before I got there. And I had no idea that she was doing that. Like she would always be gone before I got there. So she would go to the track and pray for me. Literally every day before I got there. And I was like, Wow. Okay. The amount of dedication that it takes. To get up. Go out of your way. To pray. And be, be somewhere that you don't normally go. For me was it was incredible. It was something that no one has ever done for me outside of probably like my mom, obviously my mom prays for me probably all the time. But like I never had another female do that for me. Yeah. And then just document everything, but also one of the big things that I tell people, the reason I knew that McKayla was the person that I was going to marry. The wife, my wife is that. Through all of my shortcomings through all my times where I got mad at her. like the attitude, All the times. She always just, I don't know. She just loved me through all of that. For some reason. I could be a jerk and. She would be mad at me for two seconds and then she'd be like, she would just love on me. So that was just one thing that I think I said this in our vows that. I saw the love that Christ has for me through her. And I saw that a lot of times because there's a lot of times where, you know, we sin and we mess up. And God has every right to be angry at us. Because we sin and we probably deliberately sinned. And we told them that we weren't going to do it again. And we did it anyway. And he loves us through a, he gives us grace And mercy. And so I just saw her, gave me grace through that. And it was the first time that anyone ever done that for me in that way, as far as like from a dating standpoint. And so that's when I knew that Yeah. This, the girl that I'm going to marry. Yeah, that was just. I just, I feel like everyone always asked that. That was what it was for me. And, everyone always says when, you know, you know, and I think there's a truth to that. You will know. For some reason, it's just here's something inside of you that just it did it, it makes sense. Yeah, but there will be clues. That was a big clue for me. Was that she model Christ Christ love for me. Do just her actions.

Mikaela Baker 47:43

I think too. Even going back to when we're friends, not even when we're dating, but like I said, watching you intentionally pursue the Lord, like you never claim to be perfect. That was one thing about you is. You weren't up here pretending to be something that you weren't, you were. Genuinely trying to find a better relationship with the Lord. And I still am. Yeah. I feel like it's not a. A destination. It's a journey. Is that the same?

Ronnie Baker 48:08

Yes.

Mikaela Baker 48:08

But I saw that in you and even Some of the dates that we would go on, we would go to coffee shop and we'd read through Romans. Ephesians. There's a story there. But our

Ronnie Baker 48:18

pastor, he was doing a, he was doing a sermon on dating and he said nothing good. He said something like nothing good happens after 12 o'clock you're not going to be up. Up at night. At each other's house studying Ephesians. And that was the whole. Yeah, it's

Mikaela Baker 48:30

funny because we literally caught ourself one time. It was like after midnight and we literally were studying Ephesians and we started laughing when we realized, because we're like, oh, I guess we're just weird.

Ronnie Baker 48:39

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah that's our. Our background store origin story. How we met each other. How we were friends for a long time. Started dating. Yeah. This is great. That's great. Is there anything else? Have we left out. Went to Vegas together, and that was fun.

Mikaela Baker 48:57

Shout out to my dad for paying for that.

Ronnie Baker 48:58

I want a lot of money there too. It was fun. I gambled, I gave money to them, it was me Mikayla and Miguel. I gave money to them for. To them, for them to gamble because they weren't. Kayla's frugal, man. Her dad gave her all this money to spend a Vegas and she's she spent like a hundred bucks.

Mikaela Baker 49:15

No, I spent$20.

Ronnie Baker 49:16

She's fit. She had I think she had a fi she had 500 bucks. She only spent 20 bucks go.

Mikaela Baker 49:21

$900. And I spent 20, I lost that 20 and I said, no. Very happy to give her money.

Ronnie Baker 49:27

Just gamble. Experience it, you know what. Oh,

Mikaela Baker 49:30

you were throwing a hundred dollars out on the table. And I was like, I gave you a hundred bucks

Ronnie Baker 49:34

to gamble with,

Mikaela Baker 49:35

and

Ronnie Baker 49:35

I don't know if you've made any money. Anyway,

Mikaela Baker 49:37

I'm pretty sure I just broke even. And I gave it back to you.

Ronnie Baker 49:40

I made two grand on that trip. So I was happy. But I spent more than. So. Yeah, again. I was out there. Yeah, I was out there. Having fun. But anyway, what else do, what else? A fun. Fun stuff. That we've done.

Mikaela Baker 49:55

We finally, like you said, we went on our very belated hunting. We went to carousel.

Ronnie Baker 50:00

That was a really good we went to, was it. Sandals. Good resort.

Mikaela Baker 50:04

And it was awesome. We went on ATVs. Yeah, literally going 80 kilometers an hour on a freaking 18. And that was

Ronnie Baker 50:09

fun.

Mikaela Baker 50:10

Next to the ocean was crazy. We went,

Ronnie Baker 50:12

I, you came to two meats who went to Monaco and Stockholm in 21 after I made the Olympic team. That was that was. That was a weird time. It was a great trip though. Yeah. Yeah. Cause it was like, there were still There was still like

Mikaela Baker 50:24

COVID rules. Yeah, that's right. Very strict over there.

Ronnie Baker 50:28

But yeah, that was a cool time. And

Mikaela Baker 50:30

because of COVID you got your own room, which meant that I could go because at diamond leagues you typically will share a room still.

Ronnie Baker 50:36

Yeah, you will. But if you, if you bring someone. Typically though. They can make. I can make a,

Mikaela Baker 50:41

with all tell me that I want to go to the next one now.

Ronnie Baker 50:43

It doesn't mean that I have to pay for you to get. Yeah, it's traveling overseas. It's expensive guys. Yeah. Yeah. There anything else you want to talk about?

Mikaela Baker 50:50

I feel like we've covered the basis of what. Hurricane and talk about,

Ronnie Baker 50:53

yeah, just. One of the big things that we try to do in our marriage, because it's not perfect. By any means. We're doing, we're trying to do better at. Keeping God in our, and not only number one in our lives for each of us. But then coming together and really allowing the holy spirit to be and moving, move in our marriage. And that's why we went to the marriage conference this past weekend. And just got some really good. Interesting insight on. I was convicted to feel like I was convicted the whole time. Which is a sucky thing sometimes, but also is really good because it, that there's areas that you need to grow in. But yeah, just trying to keep God. In a center. And what does that look like? Because I feel like every couple will tell you that. It really is taking the time. Not only to spend time by yourself with that, but also spend time with God with your spouse. Um, yeah.

Mikaela Baker 51:39

That was good. Yeah. What is one thing that you feel like you've learned from me since we've been married? Because I can answer that. I'll answer it first to give you time to think.

Ronnie Baker 51:50

Okay.

Mikaela Baker 51:51

I think for me, one thing that I've learned through you, like I said, when we were dating, I feel like you complimented the areas that I was weakest in. And for me that was so empowering. It's God has literally created this man to be the counterpart for everything that I need to grow in. So even today, one thing. With Maya that I saw you do is I feel like you have helped me be more patient. I'm very like go get this done. Yada. But. When it comes to patients, I feel like I'm lacking in that department and I still have room to grow there, but. I turned the corner in the kitchen, around the island today. And I see on the ground, this bucket of water and it brought tears to my eyes because the reason the bucket of water was there is Maya loves to wash your hands. For some reason every time the water turns on. Huh. She rubbed her hands together and she wants to wash your hands. And sometimes you get so frustrating, but we've tried to be creative with okay, how can we, Let her do this, but not have to hold her up at the sink. She's literally not even three feet tall yet. Yeah. And it's annoying to hold a 25 pound baby over the sink for the 10 minutes that she would want to wash your hands. But I turned the corner. And I see the bucket of water on the ground and there's like water splashes everywhere. And I had. There were on the other side of the island, there was like this puddle of water. So I just got a paper towel and wiped it up. You were putting her down for a nap. And then when I saw the water, I was like, The house doesn't have to be perfect. She wanted to play in the water. And so what'd you, do you let her play in the water? And you've always told me we can clean up the mess later. Like sometimes she'll be crunching chips in her hands, all on the rug and I'm like, My head, no, you're like, it's fine. It's fine. We can vacuum it up. And so I think one thing that I've learned from youth through marriage, and even now as parents even. Is just patience and you've been such a good example of that. And I prayed that I grow to be more like you in that regard.

Ronnie Baker 53:43

Yeah, I'm not patient about everything. That's just one area I'm on. And patient in. But take

Mikaela Baker 53:48

my button, that area.

Ronnie Baker 53:49

Yeah, I feel like you can't get mad at your kid for being a kid. Like your kid's going to make a mess. And what I've learned with having a kid is that you don't you're, you don't get better at preventing messes. You get good at cleaning them up. So all the

Mikaela Baker 54:02

time,

Ronnie Baker 54:03

just let your kid make a mess and then just clean it up. It's not that big of a deal. You're going to vacuum anyway. Just let them crunch the TIFF on the floor. Cause they're going to do it anyway, and then just get the vacuum, vacuum it up, get them up and walk the water up. Whatever it is because they're just being a kid. They don't, they're learning. So. That's patients, but also I've learned patience from Maya, just from the fact that I'm busy. I have a podcast. I do. I do live three times a week. I'm a runner. Like I practice every day. And I lift in. I'm trying to develop something else. Like I'm doing a lot of stuff. I'm on the advisory board for FCA. And I was like, okay. All this stuff I have to get done. And then Maya, I have to attend to Maya. So it's I feel like sometimes she's getting in the way, because I'm like, Hey, I got this thing I need to get done. It has to be done today, et cetera, et cetera. And it's just God showed me that. One, obviously my, as a priority, my family is priority. But also I need to be intentional with time with her. And be present because God's going to make a way for me to get all that stuff done. In a time that needs to get done. So instead of saying, I need to get this done, I need to get this done. I need to relinquish that and say, I'll get it done when God gave him the time to get it done and really attend to. My daughter at that time, because that's what, that's the most important thing, and God will make time for me to get it done. And always has gotten done on time. So that's one way to really practice that patience. It's to give up your expectations. Sometimes. And just like you have to give up your expectations that you're going to keep your house clean when you have a one-year-old. And once you give up, once you let go of that expectation, you just relax. Cause you're like, Okay. I'm not going to sit here and think that my house is going to be clean all day. I've let go of that expectation. It's going to get messy. You guess what? I'm just going to clean it up afterwards. One of the things that I've learned from you is. Not necessarily the patient's part, but more of the grace and. Forgiveness. Like I said, that was a big part of. The reason why I believe that you were going to be like, I was going to marry you. Is that is the grace that you show me. In my moodiness. In my anger sometimes. And my frustration sometimes. You just find a way to love me in that. And so I think that's the one thing that I've learned and I've tried it and better at. Is forgiving. And showing grace through times when it's hard. That'd be that.

Mikaela Baker 56:22

Cool.

Ronnie Baker 56:23

Yeah, right now, McKayla is in doing 75 hard.

Mikaela Baker 56:26

Yeah.

Ronnie Baker 56:27

She's seen a lot of gains. She's about what 30 days in

Mikaela Baker 56:30

this is 31

Ronnie Baker 56:31

31 days in, so pray for her. She's going to have

Mikaela Baker 56:34

20 more ounces to get down and then I can go to bed.

Ronnie Baker 56:37

She's going to crush it and Yeah.

Mikaela Baker 56:39

Yeah.

Ronnie Baker 56:40

They goes, oh, she's actually started her photography business as well. So if you're in the. You have to be in the Lexington area if you're anywhere and you have young children. McKayla, like she takes photos of kids, like moments with your kids.

Mikaela Baker 56:52

I was just gonna say, make sure you preface that it's family photos. Childhood memories. I don't just take pictures of people's stats. Yeah.

Ronnie Baker 56:59

You know what I mean,

Mikaela Baker 56:59

people pay me to take pictures of their kids.

Ronnie Baker 57:02

McKayla baker, photography. Dot com. Okay. Mikayla baker, photography.com. Follow me on Instagram at Ronnie underscore baker one four. And you guys can also watch my this'll be on, obviously it's on YouTube. So if you're watching on YouTube, Hit the subscribe button. If you're listening on a podcast, also subscribe to the podcast as well.

Mikaela Baker 57:21

I'm laughing because Maya loves YouTube and there's a little invite, a video. She watched his pink font hit the subscribe button. That's just what I heard in my head.

Ronnie Baker 57:30

You heard it here first hit the subscribe button, but anyway Glad you guys hung out with us. And got to hear a story. Yeah, really cool. So it was the first time a kid has been on a podcast.

Mikaela Baker 57:40

It's my podcast inauguration.

Ronnie Baker 57:41

Yes. Yes. So we got that done, but anyway, I love you guys. We'll catch you guys in the next one. Tell me what you want to hear on the podcast. What you want to know and maybe I'll create something for you.

Mikaela Baker 57:52

Leave Ronnie a five star review also. This man is putting in so much time and I'm just so proud of him. I was telling him before we started that I'm just proud of him. He's picked up a whole new skill to be able to do this and. He really is intentional with wanting to put forth content that matters. And that, will actually be impactful for people. So yeah, leave a five-star review. Tell them how awesome this podcast is and how much you love him.

Ronnie Baker 58:16

That's right. We love you guys. We're praying for you and connects with me on socials and here. And I will see you guys next week.