Reclaiming Peace During the Holidays

summary

In this episode of Growth from Grief, Sue Andersen discusses the challenges of navigating grief and anxiety during the holiday season. She emphasizes the importance of self-care, setting boundaries, and finding moments of peace amidst the chaos. Through practical strategies such as daily rituals, intentional breathing, and connecting with nature, listeners are encouraged to reclaim their sense of calm and well-being. The episode serves as a reminder that while anxiety may visit, it does not have to overstay its welcome, and that peace is always within reach.

takeaways

• Grief can be overwhelming, especially during the holidays.
• Anxiety often stems from personal expectations and external pressures.
• Physical symptoms of anxiety can manifest in various ways.
• Daily rituals can help create a sense of calm.
• Intentional breathing techniques can reduce stress.
• Setting boundaries is essential for self-care.
• Engaging in physical activity can reset your nervous system.
• Rest is crucial, especially for those who are grieving.
• Finding stillness throughout the day can aid in recovery.
• Reclaiming peace involves small, intentional steps.

Thank you for listening!   Visit www.sueandersenyoga.com for Yoga for Grief classes and additional resources.

Transcript

Susan Andersen (00:03.382)

Hello, I'm Sue Andersen, grief guide and yoga teacher dedicated to helping individuals navigate the challenging journey of loss. Welcome to Growth from Grief, where I aim to offer strategies to transition from the depths of grief to the path of healing. Whatever loss you are grappling with, here you'll discover support to ease both the physical and emotional burdens of grief. Together, let's embark on a journey towards strength, peace, and healing. I'm so glad you are here.

Hi and welcome back to this episode of Growth from Grief. I’m your host Sue Andersen. Thank you for listening to this podcast and if you are new here welcome. If you're a returning listener, hope that you've been able to share this podcast with others who are grieving and might find this information helpful. Or leaving a review on Apple or Spotify does make this podcast a little bit more available to others who are grieving and might be searching for, something to help them during their grief process. 

So today we're diving into a topic that feels very relevant during this time of year and it's how to calm anxiety and reclaim peace during the holiday season. If you're listening to this podcast you may already be feeling overwhelmed and anxious. We've gone through one holiday here in the United States, the holiday of Thanksgiving, and now we're coming into the season of many holidays and family gatherings, which can be very difficult and cause a lot of anxiety. 

You can also feel this anxiety when you put too much on yourself and I am very guilty of this. You know, I want to make the cookies and do the visiting, and you know, get all the shopping done as fast as possible and send my cards and all of those things and it can feel very, very stressful you know, and you have to be aware of that.

Susan Andersen (03:02.184)

So there's your own forces, right?  You're kind of doing it to yourself in your own actions, making yourself anxious, and then expectations, right? So you might be….other people might be expecting you to do something and so that's making you anxious or just anticipation, anticipation of having to go to somebody's house, anticipation of spending this holiday, either the first holiday without your loved one or in a new place or in just a situation that you don't want to be in and how difficult that feels and how stressful it is. 

And remember, anxiety and stress, they show up in our entire body. So physically, they affect us, right? Anxiety shows up physically. You might have stomach issues, for example, you might not sleep, you might sleep too much. So, you know, that's from a physical standpoint, you might feel that way. From an emotional standpoint, your emotions are on high, right? I mean, this is just created those rise in levels of cortisol and all of those other chemicals that really kind of put us on edge, right? So we're not in that calming, parasympathetic nervous system state. We are really just in that sometimes almost that flight or fright state when we are anxious and feeling stressed.

So it affects us physically, affects us emotionally, energetically, and certainly mentally. We can make ourselves crazy with thoughts and sometimes just get so carried away that we can't stop it. And there are some things that you can do, there are some techniques that you can do. But we also want to try to think ahead and make plans to have some sort of little ritual or time alone that you spend where you're having a daily practice of creating calm.

The poem that I'm going to read to you, it's called, I'm sorry, it's from the book Fragrance After Rain by Jaya John. And I just think it's a beautiful poem and a good reminder to us of where anxiety is, right, or who anxiety is or what anxiety is. So here it is. 

“The anxiety living in you is only a guest. It is okay for you to usher it out the door. Self-care is remembering your true identity, which is peace. You don't have to host everything that wants to overstay its visit, especially invasive species like fear and anxiety. Show your deepest hospitality to your native energy, the serene aura of love. With patient, loving work in the garden of your life, you can reclaim peace within your soul. 

So that's a beautiful poem, again, from Jaya John's book, Fragrance After Rain. And you know, the poem, really feels like a balm for the soul, doesn't it? Just so comforting. And it's a good reminder that anxiety isn't permanent. It is a visitor. And while we can't necessarily stop it from knocking at our door, we can choose how long we want it to stay. 

Let's see, let's try some different ways that we can invite peace to take the center stage and kind of forget about hosting these other emotions, the stress, the overwhelm, the anxiety. Let's kind of leave those at the door.

So the first thing that you can do is really a daily ritual. That's something so simple, but you do it maybe in the morning or multiple times during the day. Creating and developing a daily ritual really is very grounded.

Susan Andersen (08:48.374)

I can just be sitting down and having a cup of tea in silence. It can just be sitting and breathing, looking out the window at the sun or the rain or whatever the weather is and just breathing. It's a way to reclaim that peace.

Susan Andersen (09:22.634)

Intentional breathing is also a wonderful way to start the day and certainly something that you can do at any time. You can try this breathing technique. Inhale for a count of four. Hold for a count of four. And then exhale for a count of six. Repeat it for a few cycles. And just notice how your body softens. Here's another tip for creating calm and reducing stress. And that's giving yourself permission to say no.

So I mentioned earlier about expectation. Sometimes there's a lot of expectation on us about family gatherings. Maybe you're working and there's work events going on or gift giving. What truly matters to you? Ask yourself the question, what truly matters to me this season? What truly matters to me?

Susan Andersen (10:53.696)

And if someone comes to you with something and that something doesn't align with your well-being, with what matters to you, then just say no. Remember you can always say, I'll get back to you tomorrow. If you don't like to say no right away. Setting boundaries isn't selfish. It's really about self-care, and that's what we're trying to preserve. That's what we're trying to embody this holiday season.

Susan Andersen (11:44.11)

Another tip is to really engage in something that is physical, right? So that could be hiking, stretching, walking. Maybe it's taking a brisk walk. Just going outside and taking some fresh air in. All of these can be nice moments to reset your nervous system.  And as we take some kind of movement, and especially if we're doing that movement in nature, outside, it not only releases physical tension, but it does calm the mind. Begin to notice what's around you and focus less on the problem in your head. So connecting to nature and movement.

Susan Andersen (12:59.168)

And just as important as connecting to movement is rest. And you know what? We underestimate the power of rest. I am again, I'm guilty of this as well. It's the holiday hustle. And sometimes you want to keep pushing and pushing. Now, if you are grieving, this is even more important. my gosh. Resting isn't sleeping. Resting is finding pockets of stillness throughout the day. Just be, just sit in your chair, look out the window. Just sit in your car, park your car in a parking lot where you can look at trees or maybe water or something that will help you just feel calm. We'll just let you be, find some stillness. Allow yourself to rest on the couch with your feet up on a few pillows. Very calming, very restful. Give yourself permission to slow down.

Susan Andersen (14:47.854)

So I hope that these tips are some tips that you can take along with you during this busy time. And especially if you are experiencing loss and grieving, know that it's important for you to take care of yourself. It really and truly is. You need the rest.

You need that walk in nature or that little bit of movement, stretching or yoga or whatever. You need to give yourself permission to say no. And find these pockets, these moments where you can have a nice little sip of tea or coffee and just look out the window. You can have a breath technique that you take with you. 

So think about that. And as I close this episode, I want to remind you that reclaiming peace isn't about perfection. It's about small intentional steps. Anxiety may come and go, but your true identity, your peace, remains within you waiting to be nurtured.

Susan Andersen (16:28.758)

If you found this episode helpful, I'd love to hear from you. You can connect with me on social media, visit my website, suandersonyoga.com. You'll find some other resources there to help you this season. And until next time, take a deep breath, honor your journey, and remember. You are not alone.