Chaplain Neace Retires After a Decade Beside the Badge

In this episode of the Cape CopCast, we sit down with Chaplain Dr. Don Neace as he closes a 50-year chapter of ministry—and a decade walking beside Cape Coral Police and Fire—to share what truly holds first responders together when the worst calls come. Chaplain Neace's presence has spanned swearing-ins, hospital rooms, tragedies, and retirements, always with the same offer: talk, pray, or vent, no judgment. Lisa, his wife of 47 years, joins us to reveal the other half of service—the weary drive home, the boundary-setting, and what it's like to be the partner of someone who law enforcement leans on.

We dive into how chaplaincy works inside a modern department: ride-alongs that build trust, a desk in patrol that lowers barriers, and regular visits to dispatch, where stress runs high and closure is rare. Chaplain Neace explains how proximity and availability foster resilience, integrity, and professionalism across command staff, patrol, and communications. We also unpack the moment he knew it was time to retire, guided by a prayer from Psalm 39:4, and the choice to invest first in family—kids, grandkids, and being “Mr. Lisa Neace” with pride.

He also shares practical advice for new chaplains, honest marriage wisdom for first responder couples, and a clear reminder that faith and friendship can carry a load that duty alone cannot. 

Transcript

Welcomes And A Legacy Introduced

SPEAKER_03 0:03

Welcome back to the Cape Comcast. I'm Officer Mercedes Simons. Lisa's out today, but we have two amazing guests. We have Dr. and Chaplain Don Nees and his wife Lisa. Welcome. Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 0:15

Thank you.

SPEAKER_03 0:16

And uh just tell us a little bit about yourselves.

SPEAKER_00 0:20

Well, as you said, my name is Don Neese. I've been a chaplain here with Cape Coral Police Department for the last 10 years. We have just completed 50 years of ministry in total uh pastoring churches in Illinois, Virginia, and uh here in Florida. I am retiring from pastoral ministry, from full-time vocational ministry, and retiring from chaplaincy, as I said, 10 years here in Cape Coral, a little over 40 years total in chaplaincy. And it's been a wonderful experience. And today is a bittersweet day as I retire uh because I I love the people here in Cape Coral, and I love the uh Cape Coral Police Department and Cape Coral Fire Department. I've been lead chaplain with the fire department uh for the past seven years.

SPEAKER_03 1:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:20

Yeah.

The Cost And Support Of Chaplaincy

SPEAKER_03 1:21

We wanted to bring you on because you're retiring, but also you have over 10 years of history here. You've done a lot for us. I think you've been here for us in some of our biggest moments, our smallest moments. And I think things that you you've helped get people through some of the hardest moments of their life. And I think that deserves a huge thank you. And then you get to tell a little bit of your story. That's why we also wanted to bring on Lisa. You actually um you weren't intending to be on the podcast today, but I thought what a greater way to show just how much he's done for the department. You've seen front things from a far different perspective because you've been his wife. You've seen him come home, you've seen him leave at random times, and you've also sacrificed part of your life for him to be able to go and help people, and you've seen things from a different perspective.

SPEAKER_01 2:15

I have loved him being part of this, the chaplain say he uh he just he thrives, he thrives so much helping people, and um I've supported him all along with what he's wanted to do. And I've seen him tired and I've seen him come home a little weary, but uh he loves it, and I love that he loves it.

SPEAKER_00 2:39

On a personal note, I want to express my appreciation for her support. Um Lisa and I have been married for 47 years.

unknown 2:51

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 2:52

And um just last week we celebrated the 50th anniversary of our first date. And um I want to encourage everyone to remember your first date as well as your wedding date. Those are two dates that are important to at least they are to me. But Lisa has supported me and stood behind me, and as you said, you recognize uh her commitment and sacrifice has been rock solid uh throughout the 50 years of ministry uh and during the the service of chaplaincy.

SPEAKER_03 3:29

Yeah, I mean I think it it's it's interesting because it's no different just because you're not a cop with a gun, you're still in law enforcement in that capacity. So you understand how important it is to have a supportive spouse that understands. Yes. Because just like we, you know, we have call-outs all the time, we have to leave the family at random points in the in the night, you know, 3 a.m. whenever that call comes, you have to go. And so you completely understand as a married couple of what it means to have such a supportive spouse that makes you be able to continue doing what you're doing and someone there for you when you know people emotionally dump on you, I think it's fair to say. And um, I think it's it's very cool for you to also have somebody who you can uh lay your burdens on as well who understands and will listen all the time.

SPEAKER_00 4:21

I have a um my elevator speech to uh the officers and members of the department is if you want to talk, we'll talk. If you want to pray, that's kind of my wheelhouse, we'll pray. If you just want to vent, then I'll listen. And I've heard I've heard it all before. I've did I've done police and fire chaplaincy in Illinois. I did uh prison chaplaincy uh as the inside uh director of ministry inside of a I helped open a um a level six super maximum security prison.

SPEAKER_01 5:08

That was a little scary for me.

Friendship Over Pedestals

SPEAKER_00 5:10

Yeah. But and I helped open chaplaincy uh for the Virginia uh prison for the criminally insane. Uh I fit in well there. But uh and so I've I've seen a lot, I've heard of a lot, and um it has been a wild ride, but one I wouldn't trade a minute of.

SPEAKER_03 5:33

What's been your favorite part about your chaplaincy here and what you've done?

SPEAKER_00 5:39

Um becoming friends as well as chaplain with members of this department. Um it is uh it is enriching. In in ministry, a lot of times people kind of hold you at at arm's length. Even though you want to be you want to develop friendships, you want to develop a closeness with people, still yet they still have a tendency to a lot of people at least to put a to put a pastor, uh, to put a doctor up on a pedestal. Uh but I always say don't put me on a pedestal because I'll fall off. And uh uh and sometimes it's the other way around. They look with you know with uh suspect.

SPEAKER_01 6:30

What's he up to, what's he want, and uh to develop the or that uh they don't want you to know everything about them because they're afraid to end up in a sermon.

SPEAKER_00 6:44

That's that's true.

Nonjudgment And Walking Alongside

SPEAKER_03 6:46

Yeah, I think that's the the cool part about coming from like a faith-based perspective, because I think some people will hold you at an arm's length because you know they think you're gonna judge them or you're on a different level, or you're they're not coming from the same perspective that you're coming from, but I don't I don't think you've ever approached it that way. You just listen, you have your faith if they can have their faith, and it's just about having someone who you can talk to that's not going to judge that can come. I think you come from a very wise perspective, and I think people have really enjoyed having that.

SPEAKER_00 7:22

I um I've always thought that I've got enough of my own problems. I'm not gonna judge somebody else's. And uh one of the things I've always tried to emphasize is that as a chaplain, I just want to walk alongside you. I'm not going to uh tell you what to do or tell you where to, you know, but I'm gonna I'm gonna walk alongside you as you go through this journey of crisis. Uh but I've also been able to walk alongside during the uh some of the family journeys of dedicated children and uh and been available to uh when there's when officers and family members of the officers have been in the hospital, been able to go and to to to celebrate a birth and uh to celebrate birthdays uh and to be there uh in times of of crisis.

Facing Retirement And Finding Peace

SPEAKER_03 8:23

Yeah, absolutely. How do you feel about you know coming to the end of an era?

SPEAKER_00 8:28

I have I have honestly struggled with that a lot.

SPEAKER_01 8:33

I questioned him, I'm like, are you sure? Is this the right timing? He feels at peace about it. I am that's important.

SPEAKER_00 8:41

About two and a half years ago, I started praying a prayer from Psalm 39:4. Uh that's a passage of scripture that I've used in funeral sermons a lot. And the scripture says, Lord, make me to know my end, and what is the measure of my days that I may know how frail I am. And that fits a funeral sermon. But I realized about two and a half years ago, as I began to consider my age, my health, and began to look at what it might look like when it comes time to retire. Um so I began to pray that Lord may mean to know my end.

SPEAKER_01 9:26

When is the right time?

SPEAKER_00 9:28

When is the right time? Uh the measure of my days.

SPEAKER_03 9:33

And you've come to that now, I guess.

Marriage Wisdom For First Responders

SPEAKER_00 9:36

I have. My number one priority in retirement is to be Mr. Lisa Nice. I I recognize uh the the commitment, the sacrifice, and the the times when I've been away and she has uh uh has carried the load at home a lot. And so I'm going to turn around and and be the best husband I can be, be the best grandfather I can be, and as long as as long as I can.

SPEAKER_03 10:17

I love that. Now, with both of you being in some form of capacity of law enforcement, what's your best piece of marriage advice to people who are kind of undergoing the same things? From from each of you actually, that I think would be interesting.

SPEAKER_00 10:35

Open conversation. Uh I know that there are there are things that happen on the job that you just can't take home. You should not take home. Um and some of the things you don't want to take to command staff and you don't want to tell to your buddies on the on patrol. That's where the chaplain comes in.

SPEAKER_02 11:03

Yeah.

Family, Grandkids, And Travel Plans

SPEAKER_00 11:03

You come to us and we will walk alongside you and help you carry the load. But when you go home, you should have the kind of communication with your spouse that says, Okay, I can't talk about details, but I've had a bad day. And don't try to hide those things, but an open line of communication.

SPEAKER_01 11:30

I found there's there've been times that I've had to tell him, okay, you know, you need to slow down just a little bit, take a deep breath, and uh kind of get yourself back to where you need to be. Sometimes it's overwhelming. So I try to be that voice.

SPEAKER_00 11:50

She has brought a lot of wisdom to my ministry overall, and especially the chaplain scene.

SPEAKER_03 11:58

Yeah, well, I think it's important because you have to be very sympathetic, empathetic in different situations, and sometimes that's a lot, and you can't take it all home with you. It's probably very hard to have a balance. So having the amazing wife that helps you keep that balance is probably pretty important.

SPEAKER_00 12:17

Yes, it is. Yes, it is.

SPEAKER_03 12:19

Do you have any good retirement plans?

SPEAKER_00 12:22

Well, I mentioned I'm gonna be the best husband I can be. Um we have three grandchildren: 13-year-old, a 15-year-old, and a four-year-old.

SPEAKER_03 12:34

Aww.

SPEAKER_00 12:35

And the uh they all came to visit us last week. I'm still tired, but uh they're wonderful.

SPEAKER_01 12:43

Do they live local?

SPEAKER_00 12:45

Uh the 13 and 15-year-old live in Newport Richie.

SPEAKER_01 12:48

Our daughter and her husband.

Building A Home And A Community

SPEAKER_00 12:49

With our daughter and her husband. The four-year-old live uh in Richmond, Virginia, with our son and and his wife. And um so we uh we found airfares that get us to Richmond uh on a nonstop flight, uh, relatively affordable. And so we'll be spending time in Richmond and time in Newport, uh, Richie. And there's some things that that we have talked about doing for years. We want to uh I I love trains, and so if we can figure it out, and I've got a travel agent friend who's trying to find us uh a good uh tour on a train, uh we want to go uh south along the southern border, come back north and circle the United States on a train.

SPEAKER_03 13:49

Very cool. If if you're willing to go to Europe, there's a lot of really cool trains. Like Scotland has very cool trains. You can do train rides through Italy, which also means that you can eat unlimited bread and you don't get fat. I think that's a rule in Italy, if anybody can confirm.

SPEAKER_02 14:06

Well, that's great. But that would be wonderful.

SPEAKER_03 14:09

But it's just a you know, it's a long flight, but once you get there, there's just endless amounts of trains and things to do.

SPEAKER_01 14:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 14:19

Yeah. It's you know, life short. And I know people wait usually until they retire to start traveling, so I'm sure you guys have a pretty long bucket list. Yeah, we do. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:32

I've done a little bit of traveling in ministry. Uh, but again, this is where Lisa has kept the home fires. And uh she she was able, uh, once our children graduated high school, uh, she was able to travel with me to camp meetings and and revivals and and conventions where I was the speaker or leader. Uh but during the um school age of our children, uh I was on the road and she was doing the the heavy lifting.

SPEAKER_03 15:08

Yeah. And so no, I get it. Because my my husband, he just actually switched over to violent crimes. So now they have a really busy call-out schedule, and I get called out sometimes. So it's finding that hard balance. I always say, like, sometimes I've got like a hundred percent, and sometimes I've got twenty percent. So you just have to communicate where you're at, and then you gotta fill in if somebody else needs a little bit more.

SPEAKER_00 15:34

Yeah, you know, and that's one thing that that Lisa and I have been tremendously blessed in. Um that we are have really been a team in ministry, pastoring churches. Um when we have transitioned from one church to another, every church that we have moved from has has made the statement that that I can go wherever I want to go, uh, but I've got to leave Lisa.

SPEAKER_01 16:06

No, I've l I've loved our life journey. It's it's been wonderful, challenging at times, but I wouldn't trade it.

SPEAKER_00 16:16

I remember one time our both of our children went to went to university here in Florida. And when we we brought our son, he was the the youngest, um, we brought him and dropped him off, moved him into the dorm and dropped him off. And Lisa looked at me and said, Florida's a nice place to visit, but I would never want to live here.

SPEAKER_01 16:38

Don't ever say never. Because you don't know what's gonna happen.

SPEAKER_00 16:43

So we have lived here now for 13 years.

SPEAKER_03 16:45

I was gonna ask.

SPEAKER_00 16:46

13 years.

SPEAKER_03 16:47

But now you're never leaving, right? Yep.

SPEAKER_00 16:49

We have our home on a on on a lake, uh, and this is our retirement place until uh until the Lord sees different for some reason.

SPEAKER_03 17:05

I love that.

unknown 17:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 17:06

I also said when we moved into our house that we're never moving, so we're also stuck. Yeah. But in the best way. It's so nice when you know that it's like you're forever home. Yeah. You know, there's just a sense of like, let me hang up that picture, let me change out my countertops or whatever you want to do to just make it yours and make it home.

SPEAKER_00 17:27

Yeah. But and we were we were blessed to be able to. We moved um to one of our churches when our when our uh daughter was in second grade, and we lived in that home until both of our children had graduated high school and went away to college.

SPEAKER_03 17:46

And so that was that's a long time to live somewhere where it's kind of temporary. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It is. But you did it. Yeah. And now you're here.

Advice For New Chaplains

SPEAKER_00 17:57

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 17:58

Um, what would you like to say to the new oncoming uh um chaplains that we're gonna get? Do you have any wisdom for them?

SPEAKER_00 18:10

Do ride-alongs, spend time here in the department, don't wait for a call that come here and develop relationships. Um one of the things that I've really enjoyed, and uh command staff has g has given me a workplace, uh, a small desk in the patrol office, uh, where I set up a computer and have a Bible. And sometimes I've been able to come and just do some Bible study and work on sermons. And then sometimes people drop by my desk and we chat for a few minutes, and every time I come, I visit each, you know, all three floors.

SPEAKER_01 18:55

Yeah. And just make yourself available.

SPEAKER_00 18:58

Yeah, just make myself available, put a put a face with the name. Uh I encourage them to always uh check in with dispatch because those folks are working tremendous stressful jobs, and they're basically hidden in a room upstairs.

Dispatch And Hidden First Responders

SPEAKER_03 19:19

They are, and they never get to hear the end of the story either. They'll they'll be on traumatic phone calls of people whose lives are in danger. They're not being saved yet because the police aren't there, and then the police arrive and it's like, oh, you don't get to finish the end of that book.

SPEAKER_02 19:36

Right.

SPEAKER_03 19:36

So that's hard. And I know that they've really appreciated you being here too, because not that they're forgotten, but I think they're also first responders in their own right. Exactly. And I think it's important to remember that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:50

And so those kind of those kind of things for for a new chaplain. Um if if they wait for a call, those calls don't come frequently. But if you if if they know, if the department knows, the command staff, the victims advocates, I've worked well with victims advocates. They've been a blessing to me.

SPEAKER_03 20:15

They're awesome too.

SPEAKER_00 20:16

And um uh if if people know your name and know your face, uh, then you're more likely to get that call at 3 a.m.

SPEAKER_03 20:29

Absolutely. I've always I've always seen you around, available. You'll send out emails and say, hey, I'm gonna be here if you want to come talk or just hang out or or whatever people want to do. And I know that that's that helps because we'll see your face in the hall, and maybe it's just the smile that we needed that day that we wouldn't have otherwise gotten.

SPEAKER_02 20:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 20:48

Um, I I want to say thank you on behalf of everyone for doing everything that you've done for us for the past 10 years, being there for us, leaving your family in the middle of the night to go love on us, help us, and get us through the hard times.

Culture, Care, And Critical Incidents

SPEAKER_00 21:03

One of the highest honors of my life is to serve in chaplaincy and especially with Cape Coral Fire and Cape Coral Police Department. This has just been uh one of the greatest experiences of chaplaincy that I've had in over 40 some years of chaplaincy.

SPEAKER_01 21:22

I couldn't be prouder of him. He's he's amazing.

SPEAKER_03 21:25

Aww, I love that. See, we're happy we we got Lisa as an extra bonus today. She's awesome.

SPEAKER_00 21:31

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_03 21:32

We didn't get Lisa Greenberg, but we got Lisa. Thank you. So it's awesome.

SPEAKER_00 21:39

Thank you. It's I've I have happily served and it's been it's been rewarding for me and hopefully people will will carry memories of this old bald headed guy that used to hang around and and And pray for us. And uh I've been excited to to be alongside when when uh when officers have have retired to see them reach this point. And it's been exciting to be a part of the swearing-in ceremonies.

SPEAKER_03 22:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 22:18

Uh where we swear in children, it looks like to me. Every year I get older, the the new officers get younger. And uh, but it's it's exciting. And the culture of this department has been so rewarding. I talk when I when I go to other departments or I go out of state to to meetings and stuff, I talk about this department. And I and I commend the uh the culture of professionalism and integrity that is displayed from command staffed to everyone on patrol.

Honoring Fellow Chaplains And Legacy

SPEAKER_03 23:01

Yeah, this is an awesome department, but I don't think that that culture could have been fostered without having the backbone in the department of people like you there to support us. Because thank you. I I and I'm and I mean that because if we didn't have an outlet of somebody to talk to when things get hard, then people fall in. I mean it's it's law enforcement. You go to a baby death or something like that, and then you just you know, if you're if you don't talk it out or talk to the right person, then you can just go downhill. Exactly. Get really sad. Things affect you, things affect your job, your home life. So you've helped us to create that culture and basically keep us mentally safe as much as we keep everybody else physically safe in the community.

SPEAKER_00 23:46

It's and I would I would be remiss if I didn't commend the work of Chaplin Dennis Gingrich, yeah, who has been around for 34 years, I think, 33 of chaplaincy here with the departments. And uh chaplain uh Patrick Miller is one of the newbies, but he's he's coming along and and uh doing good work. And I know that Chaplain Gingrich is uh uh interviewing right now to find someone to uh to fill the the space that I'm uh leaving. And so uh they are doing great work.

SPEAKER_03 24:27

Yeah, and it, you know, as much as you can interview for somebody different, I think there's still a legacy that you've left that that we really do appreciate.

SPEAKER_00 24:37

Oh, thank you so much. I've like said it's one of the greatest honors of my life.

SPEAKER_03 24:42

Well, thank you so much for joining us. Is there anything else that you wanted to say that was on your heart?

SPEAKER_00 24:52

Draw on your faith in the Lord every day. Um because as much as a chaplain wants to walk alongside you and be there for you, the Lord has promised I will never leave you or forsake you. And so you draw on that promise while you're waiting for the chaplain to show up or to uh or in in the midst of your crisis, draw on the Lord.

SPEAKER_03 25:28

I don't think that that could be said any better. So we'll leave it there. Thank you both so much for joining us. Thank you for watching the Cape Copcast, and we'll see you next time. Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 25:39

Thank you so much, Mercedes. Great job.