26. How I lost 82 Pounds | Debra Fowler

Meet Debra Fowler, a 48-year-old nurse from North Carolina who went from hiding in the back of photos to confidently stepping on the scale each week. Her incredible 82-pound weight loss journey began with a powerful wake-up call at a funeral where she realized denial wasn't working anymore.

In this raw, honest conversation, Debra shares how she tried everything—from calorie counting journals to meal replacement programs—before finding what actually worked. She opens up about the shame of eating candy in secret, the physical pain that made walking unbearable, and how GLP-1 medications finally gave her the control she'd been desperately seeking.

What makes this story special: Debra's 15-year-old daughter became her workout accountability partner, and now they're crushing fitness classes together three times a week. From spinal fusion surgery to finding joy in getting dressed again, this episode proves that getting healthy isn't about perfection—it's about finding what works for YOUR life.

If you've ever felt stuck, judged by doctors, or wondered if you're "broken," Debra's story will remind you that you're not alone, and it's never too late to take back control.

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Transcript

Debra Fowler (00:00)
I ended up going to my daughter who's 15 and asked her if she wanted to start going with me. Now we go together and she's my accountability.

coach. Yeah, because there are still days, I mean everybody who works out, there's still days you don't want to go, but I'll say to her, we signed up for this class, do you want to go? Oh yeah, yeah, let's do it. And I have to go because I'm her ride, right? But yeah, but we've had a lot of fun.

Bill Jollie (00:09)
of it.

Hey everyone, it's Jollie here with Interrupt Hunger. Thanks for joining us again today. We've got Deborah Fowler from North Carolina. Deborah, welcome to the show.

Debra Fowler (02:46)
Thank

for asking me to be here.

Bill Jollie (02:47)
Of course, you've been on quite the health journey over the years. So to start this off, why don't you tell us about your family dynamics, your work dynamics and your age if you don't mind, because the whole point of these, how I did it series, how I transformed my health is somebody listening somewhere around the world. We're in.

Debra Fowler (02:50)
Mm-hmm.

Bill Jollie (03:07)
multiple countries around the world now, which is cool. But somebody listening is gonna hear you today and think, my gosh, she's just like me. And if she can do it, then I can too. So with that, why don't you tell us about yourself?

Debra Fowler (03:21)
I'm in Raleigh, North Carolina. Family Dynamics, I am married with one daughter. She's 15 and is 48 years old. And I am a nurse by training, but have spent many years in pharmaceutical sales and in the CRO world for clinical research and currently work in proposals, writing proposals for oncoming studies.

Bill Jollie (03:44)
All right, very good. So the neat thing about

sharing your journey with people is you get to share like whatever you want. You can share as much as you want and be as vulnerable as you want. Or, if there's things you want to keep to yourself, that's totally fine, too. This is your story. You get to tell it. So why don't you tell us what it was like before you decided to make these massive changes in your life and get healthy?

Debra Fowler (04:10)
could go way back because it's been a struggle for my whole life. And the first time I remember being overweight and feeling really uncomfortable actually started when I was a freshman in high school. So was about 14 or 15 years old. And from there, it was a back and forth thing as far as being able to keep it off, but it was always a struggle. Having to watch, I remember keeping journals where I would write down everything I ate and calories and fat.

It was time consuming and it didn't really help as much as I wanted it to. When I worked out, there was a big change, right? I would gain muscle mass and that would increase my metabolism. But even that, I feel like when I hit 40, 42, really changed. It changed a lot. And so now at 48, being peri-menopausal, it really slowed down and it became extremely hard no matter what I did

keep the weight off. I've tried every plan you can think of.

to the programs where you go and sit in meetings and they weigh you in weekly, to the programs where you buy supplements and you supplement meals throughout the day and eat one good meal at the end of the day generally. I tried all of those, very hard to maintain for me, for my lifestyle. And as you know, Bill, especially in pharmaceutical sales or when we're traveling, those things aren't always so convenient, right? Being on the road.

So

this lifestyle that I changed that I made in 2023 has really catapulted me into a new place in my life. And can I tell you how I got there? What happened? Okay. So, and I think a lot of us around the world went through the whole 2020 lockdown.

Bill Jollie (05:52)
Please do.

Debra Fowler (05:57)
I know for me and my family, we tend to eat a little more and move a lot less being stuck in the house for a year. while I had ongoing weight coming on starting about 2017, which is as I was moving into my 40s, when I got into 2020, it was unreal. It was unreal how it came so suddenly to me.

I I talked to you about this before, but denial, right? Especially when you're sitting around the house for a year in stretchy pants, you're in denial that you've gained as much weight as you have.

So in March of 2023, unfortunately, my husband's father died suddenly. And as I was getting ready to go to the funeral, I remember thinking, oh, I'm going to see a lot of people that I haven't seen in a long time, Tommy's friends and some family. And I looked different, right? I knew I looked different, but I didn't really, again, realize how different I looked. And that morning before the funeral, I stepped on the scales.

and my mind was blown. I hadn't stepped on the scales or really looked in a mirror for a long, time because I didn't feel comfortable looking in a mirror. It was just easier to deny that it was anything. yeah, 2023 is when all of this started and the struggles have gone down a lot with my new routine.

Bill Jollie (07:18)
Yes.

You are not alone by any means. It breaks my heart every time I hear somebody say that they didn't like looking in the mirror or they fight so hard not to be in pictures because if you're not in that position, you have no idea. so many people just say, come on, it's just a photo. You'll be fine. You're beautiful. And unless.

Debra Fowler (07:39)
in.

Bill Jollie (07:42)
Unless you're looking at it through the other lens, they just don't get it. that's a horrible place to be.

Debra Fowler (07:46)
it

and I became a master

at hiding. If we had a group picture, was going to, I'm five foot two, but I would find a way to be in the back. And if we had just a small group, maybe four or five people, I would always be on the end. So when it was time to put the picture out there, I could crop myself and you could just see the front in my face. you couldn't, in my mind, you couldn't really tell how much weight I had gained. Looking back, I was fooled.

I mean it was obvious but I did everything I could to deny it and to hide it.

Bill Jollie (08:21)
I get it. So usually there's some...

there's there's some moment in time that going forward

everything just clicks and it's just so much easier. The willpower, the sheer determination to get healthy is just so much stronger and pushes back against our environment. how'd you go from there? What were some of the first things that changed?

Debra Fowler (08:43)
So when I weighed myself that morning,

I had to put on a dress that I hadn't worn in a while, right? And I went to the funeral. And I think a lot of people may have experienced this before, but I can speak from a woman's perspective, that we had, people look at you a certain way when you're slender or you're younger or you're healthy.

there's just a way they look at you and I think my switch was I weighed myself that morning and then when I got to the funeral people looked at me different and it wasn't because we were sad that we were at a funeral they they kind of looked at me like they I don't know pitied me maybe and then after that we did some other social things and

that feeling of how people look at you really hit home. And again, that was something I was in denial about because I had quit going anywhere. Not looking just in the mirror, but doing anything with my life. I didn't want to do anything. So when I finally started getting out there, I felt what I guess other people saw, right?

So I'll go ahead and tell you, I was at 5'2". I was 222 pounds. And wow, I don't even know how it got there. In fact, when I was pregnant with my daughter, the most weight I gained, I was 160, which was a healthy amount at the time for me to gain. It was about 35, 40 pounds. So when I looked at the scales and I saw 222, I nearly fell over because I hadn't stepped on them in years.

So from there, I tried to do it alone. I tried really hard to change what I ate, to do the lifestyle changes that I knew had worked in my 20s, and it didn't work anymore.

I spent the first few months from that March until about August trying to do it by myself and the lowest I could get was 208 and I know you may think that that sounds pretty good when you break up that amount of calories but I was trying so hard I was starving I was moving I had no energy and it just wasn't

It wasn't there. So that's when I sought out a doctor. He actually, he used to be an ER doctor and I knew his name from being a nurse and I'd worked in the ER. And he had started a metabolic clinic. So I started going to him and that's when things started to change

Bill Jollie (11:05)
It's almost impossible to do it on your own. the thing they don't realize is they feel like they're broken. Like what you were going through in those first few months before you sought out help. When you try to do it on your own, it's almost impossible. And studies show if you need to lose 20 % body weight or more, you have a 95 % chance of failure.

Only 5 % of people are able to do that on your own. it's just hard hearing when people think that they just I just don't have enough willpower. I don't have enough discipline. So, all right. So tell us about this doc.

Debra Fowler (11:36)
Mm-hmm.

Okay,

so I went to the doctor and when I first went, the first thing he talked about was, of course, modification in what I was eating. again, I was so deeply enrooted in denial that I knew what to eat. I I knew from being a nurse and what I did in my 20s, but I was in denial. So he asked me to list out what I ate and

I mean, was pretty bad. It was pretty bad. I was addicted to sugar. And as we talked about, sugar is about what? Eight times more addictive than cocaine. Studies have shown. And so I was. I was highly addictive to sugar. And that's when he laid it out for me. He said, have you ever seen the Pillsbury Doughboy?

And I said, yeah, I've seen the little dough boy. He said, think about him when you think about what you're going to eat. He said, those carbs, those breads, those sugars, there's a reason he's a little round fella, right? Because the things that make up what he sells, and this is, I'll still eat Pillsbury, I love Pillsbury, but it's the over amount of eating it. You end up being a little round fella. And the way he laid it out for me made a lot of sense.

We started there. And then he talked to me about all the options that were available. Everything from Fentermine, which has been around forever for appetite suppression, to things like Metformin, used for diabetes, can help control weight. ultimately, he led me back around to GLP-1s.

And at the time, I didn't know a lot about them, even as a nurse, because I was focused on other areas. You know, we specialize in different areas in medicine. So I didn't know a lot about them. And he really enlightened me as far as the GLP ones. They...

there's a stigma and I think you have mentioned it before there's a huge stigma with GLP-1s and so when he mentioned it I had that stigma in my mind right this is this is cheating and I'm not doing it the right way

I'll get to the rest of that in a second. But we went through the GLP-1s and we started with the 1-gut hormone, which was the first generation. And now I'm on the 2-gut hormone. And huge difference for me in the 2 medications. And it has changed my world because I always wanted to work out again.

And it wasn't until I started the medication that I started to lose weight to control my hunger, to control that craving for the sugar, that I then could lose enough weight where I could move, where I could start working out again. it's just changed my life. But I haven't admitted to everybody that I use it.

My mom doesn't

Bill Jollie (14:22)
because that bias and stigma in

society are still very real. I hear it all the time. Yes. Hey, so go back just for a second to interrupt you. So some people, a lot of people don't understand what you just said. You had to start losing weight before you could exercise. Tell us what that's like.

Debra Fowler (14:29)
Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

So I had always been very active when I was younger, right? I knew the rules of activity. I had trained with trainers before, but while I was still overweight, specifically even before I started the GLP ones, right, or in a little bit after I started,

The weight was prohibitive in what I could do. I didn't have any cardio function. Things still hurt. My joints hurt. My back hurt. Moving was, it wasn't a choice. To get out there and do what I used to do or even to do it halfway wasn't a choice. Walking was terrible for me at the time. So now, you know, I'm able to do things and I'll hit on that in a minute, but I, it's,

It changed my life and it was again isolating. I didn't want to join a gym because I didn't want anybody to see me struggle and I didn't always want to walk in the neighborhood because again I didn't want people to see me struggle and think there's that overweight girl trying to I mean I was always scared of what other people thought of me. Yeah.

Bill Jollie (15:42)
Yeah, sure.

We all are different degrees of perception of what people are, how people are looking at us what they think. That's a stigma bias towards obesity and our society is very, very real. All right. So you got on these meds, you're feeling better.

Debra Fowler (15:56)
Yeah.

Bill Jollie (16:01)
Then what?

Debra Fowler (16:02)
So I didn't feel better right away, like I said. So I started the journey with the GLP-1s August of 2023. And I would say it took a few months, right, of losing the weight and starting to feel confident again, where movement started to increase and being able to go places started to feel better.

I ended up joining a gym. It's an all-girls gym and it's a little different so I felt comfortable going to it because there were women there struggling just like me. It's a lot of aerobic and isolated strength training. I ended up, you know, I still had motivation to go but

I ended up going to my daughter who's 15 and asked her if she wanted to start going with me. Now we go together and she's my accountability.

coach. Yeah, because there are still days, I mean everybody who works out, there's still days you don't want to go, but I'll say to her, we signed up for this class, do you want to go? Oh yeah, yeah, let's do it. And I have to go because I'm her ride, right? But yeah, but we've had a lot of fun.

Bill Jollie (16:54)
of it.

Debra Fowler (17:10)
It's motivating having a partner if you can get one, even if you just meet one in class or at the gym and you start working out together. That was motivating for me. And that, so once I

started to lose the weight and started to be able to control what I ate and when I ate so it wasn't waking up at midnight and going to get a bowl of cereal every night. I was then able to start working out and then that starts to change your perception of life as well. You feel stronger and I don't necessarily look stronger yet.

probably to anybody else, but I feel it and I feel more comfortable going places. I look in the mirror now. You know, I weigh myself once a week. I do things that I never had the guts to do a few years before. And they sound like such simple things. And people who've never been in this situation don't understand. And it's not just about vanity, right? It's about how you feel about yourself and about your confidence in yourself.

and how disappointed you are in yourself that it happened.

Bill Jollie (18:14)
That's just that. Yeah, but I totally get it. Yeah. Wow. That's a lot. Thanks for being so vulnerable and sharing. It's hard sometimes. Let's see on the exercise. what's that?

Debra Fowler (18:20)
Yeah. Yeah.

You

Yeah, well wanted to jump back.

You said healthcare, right? So I ended up getting a laminectomy or spinal fusion in November of 23. Prior to that, two, three, four years prior to that, the back pain really got bad, right? So I went to some doctors and they weren't ready to do anything. So I ended up going to a anesthesiologist that did spinal injections. And he would have me on the table doing the spinal injection every time.

And he would say, you've got to lose weight. You've got to lose weight. And he attributed everything that was going on to me with my back to the weight. And ultimately that wasn't true. I had arthritic scoliosis. But in his mind, and I believe in the other doctors' minds, was that I could control this pain, that it was just the weight. And that wasn't always true. But they never talked to me about...

how to lose it or what I should do or ask me what my routine was or how I felt. It was just you need to lose weight and you felt judged even by the doctors. Yeah.

Bill Jollie (19:26)
Yeah.

It's it is crazy how many people have told me that due to their obesity, they were misdiagnosed and made to feel less than. And yeah, you just it's crazy. We used to always put doctors up on such a pedestal. And you've been a nurse now know that all doctors are not created equal.

Debra Fowler (19:48)
There are some really good ones, but

there are some that, you know. Yeah.

Bill Jollie (19:52)
Yeah, yeah. that's a shame. sorry, when, did you start losing weight and getting healthy.

Debra Fowler (19:54)
Yeah.

journey started when I started

trying myself was March 23 and I started the injections in August of 23 and again, the GLP-1 first generation worked really well but I still had that craving. It gets rid of the hunger but not the craving and that was part of my problem was the craving, the food, the wanting it. So...

I'd say probably a year after starting the first generation I was on a new insurance and I thought why don't I apply again to see if I can get the second generation and it was so easy with this new insurance and I was fortunate because I know it's not true with a lot of them.

So I was able to get it. I started the second generation in last August and that made a huge difference. Huge difference. Yeah.

Bill Jollie (20:52)
So I think it is getting easier for folks. Talk to us about the control that you have over your life now.

Debra Fowler (21:04)
Yeah,

that's a good question because I think when I was going through what I went through the past several years with gaining weight and denial, you don't feel like you have control in anything. And when I started the medication first before anything else, when I started that, I...

thought that was my way of control at first, right? I had control of that injection and I was gonna work it. And then I didn't wanna waste what that was doing, so I became in control of what I ate. And again, before, I felt like I had no control. I let cravings and hunger, not true hunger always, drive this overeating. there's a, as you start to lose weight and you...

you become healthier, you feel like you have control of everything. I can decide when I sleep now. I'm not sleepy all the time. I can decide when I move, when I go places. Before, I didn't feel like I had control. I just didn't do those things. Yeah.

Bill Jollie (22:05)
So I am, thanks for that. I like to say that I'm treatment agnostic. Like, I don't care. There's so many different forms of, so many different ways to get healthy. So GLP-1s, everybody talks about those now. There's surgery, bariatric surgery. It's very, very effective, incredibly effective. It doesn't matter how you start.

Debra Fowler (22:14)
Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Right.

Bill Jollie (22:28)
Right?

Just, just start. doesn't matter. just going to seek help. And it might be an exercise specialist. It might be a coach, or, you know, any, types of trainers. it might be going to a, dietitian to, you know, just, like I said, bariatric surgery, endocrinology, family medicine, like it doesn't matter. Like just, we need help.

Debra Fowler (22:46)
Yeah.

Bill Jollie (22:48)
We do.

And that makes all the difference

Debra Fowler (22:50)
I am.

career, actually sold a weight loss device that would be implanted into the body to make the stomach smaller. And it competed in a small way with bariatric surgery, such as the sleeve or the bypass, right? In learning about that population, or what they went through, I went to some of the support groups for people who had bariatric surgery. And that was eye-opening as well for me.

I

this was before I really started to gain a lot of weight. It was just before. But you you were talking about the control and I had to think about some of these folks and I still think about them. And they would say, just getting on a plane, right? Just getting on and having to wait till everybody's seated and then ask the stewardess and you whisper quietly, I need a seatbelt extender or...

somebody sitting next to you and you feel like you're on top of them kind of thing. Even walking through a turnstile at a theme park could be, and they talked about those things. And again, just like you said, I don't think it matters how you do it. I don't think it matters as long as it's a healthy way to do it. Yeah. And being able to look back and have learned something that can help other people.

And that's what I got from going to those meetings, yeah.

Bill Jollie (24:08)
Yeah, I love that. Yeah.

Okay. So here's just a couple quick questions. So when you were talking about exercise, how old's your Okay. So you're in clinical research. You got a 15 year old daughter. You're married. What did a week of exercise look like for you? how many times a day and then what times

Debra Fowler (24:26)
Okay, yeah, so we try to go at least three times a week. And the great thing about where I go here in Raleigh, they have, I don't know, 25 or 30 different types of classes. So one class could be yoga or a bar or step, bands. mean, just, and so you have all these things to choose from. So we try to go about three times a week. Today, after I finish this call, we're gonna go over and we do a cardio strength class.

and we yeah we do as much as we can and in between those days when we don't go we talk about what else we could be doing like we've talked about going to walk at the park at the museum those types of things but at least three times a week yeah if I go less I

Bill Jollie (25:13)
So it's always like,

yeah, mostly in the mornings or in the evenings, little both. Yeah, that's okay.

Debra Fowler (25:16)
sorry. ⁓ Just because of schedules,

a lot of times it's like 5.30, 6.30, but now during the summer we are able to go. So I actually like to go around lunchtime personally and then have lunch after. So we'll go around lunchtime. On the weekends, we will sometimes go at 8.30, eight o'clock classes. So it varies for us. And I haven't found that one time of the day, at least for me,

Bill Jollie (25:41)
Yeah.

Debra Fowler (25:44)
that one time of the day is better than the other as long as you go.

Bill Jollie (25:48)
It does help having a accountability partner built in. Yeah. So what about your your eating style? Because again, just like we were talking about, it doesn't matter what kind of treatment you go for first. There's there's a lot of different ways to eat healthier. So what was eating like for you?

Debra Fowler (25:50)
Yeah.

Yeah.

It used

to be awful, awful. But now it is, I started with the healthy side and what I could eat that was better for my body and thinking it through and cutting out the things that weren't. And now it's more about the healthy things plus portions and timing. I try not to eat after certain time of night, which is hard because my husband likes to eat.

around 730, 8 o'clock at night for dinner. But I try not to do that. I try to eat as early as I can so I'm not going to bed on a full stomach. I don't know if there's any science to that. I've heard there is. You don't want to eat right before you go to bed. But...

That's what I try to do. whereas before, now this is embarrassing for me to admit, but it's true, I would eat like a whole pack of candy before bed because I wanted the sugar and it was comforting and it was easy. Nobody could see me eating it, right? Like it was...

Bill Jollie (27:01)
Yeah, yeah. No, I get it. Thanks. So how do you feel now? Like health wise?

Debra Fowler (27:03)
Yeah.

Good,

good. You talked about control. I feel like I'm in control of things and even down to what I drink. I didn't need to drink more water, but I drink diet soda in lieu of water sometimes, but I feel like I'm in control of everything now. I don't have to walk through the store or at the checkout line and feel like I have to have.

something sweet or have to have something to eat to fill this void. I don't know how to explain it. I don't know if you understand but there's like a void that you wanted to eat to fill and now the control is empowering. yes, empowering. Did I say it right? So now the control is empowering and I feel like

Bill Jollie (27:54)
Yeah.

Debra Fowler (27:57)
I can decide now. It's not decided for me. I can decide what I eat, when I eat, when I work out, when I go out. Getting dressed is actually kind of fun now because I can decide what looks good, whereas before it was just going to be something oversized and something stretchy. And I didn't really have a choice. And it's fun now to have that.

Bill Jollie (28:24)
That's cool to hear. I love hearing that. That was neat, thanks. Okay, last question. So this journey has lasted a little bit of time. You've learned a lot. So if somebody came to you later today and heard your story and asked like, where do I start? What kind of tips would you give somebody?

Debra Fowler (28:40)
Mm-hmm.

I think for me, where do you start comes down to what you think is going to work for you. So I think it would be defining what's going to work in your life. I have a friend who's lost a lot of weight and does really well on the meal supplements. And I've had some really good friends that got bypassed.

in making that decision, actually think, and I have a doctor that I talk to, I think it actually helps when you're trying to make that decision to maybe even start with a therapist so you know where your mind is at, your mindset and...

you're able to make that decision without being coerced by a physician or what a friend did. And then I think finding a physician after that that is invested in your health, not what they can sell you or what necessarily their results are going to be, but someone who actually follows you and cares about you getting to where you want to be, where you feel comfortable, where you feel healthy.

So those are probably finding the right people.

Bill Jollie (29:43)
That's some good advice. Finding the right people can be really, really hard. So don't get discouraged. Just like a diet, you try one way and like, okay, like keto is not for me. There's no way I can do that. And you find, you know, you keep trying. A couple of good places to start for folks if they're looking, somebody that's certified in obesity medicine. So obesity medicine association is a really good place. And then also somebody certified in lifestyle medicine. So there's American college of lifestyle medicine. They both have a physician.

Debra Fowler (29:46)
Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Bill Jollie (30:11)
finders and you can look for dietitians, exercise specialists, all kind of thing. There's help out there. But find the right one, whoever works for you. And it might not be the first one, so that's

Debra Fowler (30:14)
Yeah.

So into your point if you find someone that's recommended that has a good background they sometimes can recommend someone to talk to and a dietitian. Yeah.

Bill Jollie (30:32)
great advice. With that, Debra Fowler, thanks for joining us today. We appreciate you so much.

Debra Fowler (30:36)
Yeah, thank you. Yeah,

I appreciate you asking, Bill. And keep it coming. I love hearing other people's stories. It's really motivating. And I love what you're doing with Interrupt Hunger.

Bill Jollie (30:46)
Oh, cool. Thanks. I appreciate that. All right. Well, this has been a lot of fun. Thank you so much.

Debra Fowler (30:48)
Yeah.

Thank you. Bye.