Smarter Not Harder Ep. 4: You’re going to feel mom guilt even if you’re working from home.

Because every mom deals with guilt. 

The only question is what that guilt’s going to be about.

• Using the frozen pizza one night instead of cooking from scratch for optimum nutrition?
• Letting your phone play babysitter once too often?
• Not running a business to bring your gifts to the world? 

So let’s stop with this idea that the mere existence of you having mom guilt as a CEO mother means you’re doing something wrong. We all do. 

The question is what you make of it. What you do in response to it. 

You’ve got this!

Alyssa

Love your daily life again as a work-at-home mom: https://yourunbusylife.com/ 

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Transcript

This is the Unbusy Mom, and today we’re talking about why you’re going to feel mom guilt even if you’re working from home.

So, here’s your truth bomb for today: Every mom deals with guilt. 

EVERY mom.

The only question is what that guilt’s going to be about.

• Using the frozen pizza one night instead of cooking from scratch for optimum nutrition?
• Not taking them on that park outing ‘cause you were exhausted?
• Letting your phone play babysitter once too often?
• Or NOT running a business to bring your gifts to the world? 

What’s yours going to be? 

Me, I refuse to believe that I was only put here to keep the house in order (yes, I’m pretty good at it) and raise the 5 kids I’ve been given (so sue me, I actually DO enjoy all those teenage late-night talks).

I’ve got one MORE mission on my life, and it’s to do with just ME. The gifts God put into me at birth and therefore expects me to steward. I’m responsible to HIM for what I do with them.

So let’s stop with this idea that the mere existence of you having mom guilt as a CEO mother means you’re doing something wrong. We all do. 

The question is what you make of it. What you do in response to it. (Those feelings of wrong choices, or regret, or inadequacy, or guilt.)

What’s your response going to be then? To lean into your purpose, to find a way to do it better, or to let guilt guilt you into leaning out?

Don’t lean out – that’s exactly what the enemy wants you to do.

He wants to stop your purpose.

• Maybe you’re not sure how to fit the team retreat with the mastermind client get-together alongside your kids’ soccer game schedule.
• Maybe you feel like you’re being led to open up way more VIP day slots in your calendar but you’re not sure how the laundry and the cooking are going to get done when you’re on with a client 5 hours at a time.

You know what? If this is your mission - if running that mastermind and leading that team and changing a bunch more people’s lives through your half day intensives is what God wants you to do right now, He’ll find a way to fit everything in.

He’s not going to let you drop one part or the other of your “why I was put here on earth” mission. Either the family part, or the business one. Okay?

Even if it’s something smaller. Like every time you sit down to batch out your podcast episodes for the next few weeks, ‘cause it’s only one day every month-ish, but everything has to flow just right (because you’ve got kids around).

You know what? I treat "monthly recording day” like a mini launch day, and it totally works for my energy - even with 5 kids around! 

And no, I’m not ignoring them. I’m just shifting what needs to happen in our household for that one day each month, and letting it be good enough. They’re prepped and told ahead of time.

But that day, it comes down to what *I* need as the person behind the microphone.

I’ve got to have my food all ready to go - no 20-minute leisurely lunch stirfries for me that day - and a few recording drinks or snacks on hand for when my voice or energy needs a break.

The kids need to have their minimum school to-do lists and chore lists (if applicable) all laid out for them (and verbally gone over before I retreat).

This is why I think of my once-a-month recording days like mini launch days - because I’m letting my family know up front that I’m going to be spending 3-4 hours holed up batch recording, away from them, but that this is just temporary. 

That I WILL be out every so often to take a food-and-energy break, and say hi to everyone while I’m snarfing a breakfast burrito and warming up my next cup of herbal tea, so that THEY can get a break from being quiet, too.

That this IS a finite period of time - here’s how far along I am in the “number of episodes” recording process - and then I’ll go back into my room again, shut the door, put on the headphones, and smile when I hear the older ones shushing the younger ones. “Mom’s recording again - you have to be quiet!”

But I GAVE myself permission to have my food pre-prepped, nothing else on the schedule for me to do that day except husband my energy for the recording process, and lean OUT of the hands-on parenting a little more (with tech time and special activities allowed to keep everyone occupied while I wrap up that last set of episodes).

Then I turn off the microphone with a sigh of relief, we all come back together again, and I go grab another cup of coffee. Just sayin’.

• So journal on whatever you need to about this mom guilt situation that you’re having - it doesn’t have to be launch week or recording day for you (though it might be). 
• Ask God if there’s any kernel of truth to these regrets you keep having over how you’re using your time and showing up (or not) that day/week/month. 
• And then do whatever He tells you to do.

And if He tells you it’s okay, take Him at His word. Trust Him. Aka, throw the mom guilt in the trash and move on. 

Because He just told you those feelings were a lie.

Remember, you’re allowed to be human – you’re allowed to have doubts and flounderings and regrets. The key is what you do with them.

Evaluate and change? Evaluate and throw out? Or wallow in and ditch your unique, eternal purpose?

It’s up to you.

YOU get to live the “more time with my kids” and “everything on my to-do list checked off” version of your DREAM life, because YOU chose to handle your MINDSET around having it all being possible for you in the first place.

So.... 

What’s God calling you to reevaluate about your mental CEO load today?