Does this count as “being too selfish” when you’re a business mom? (Nope.)

Where in the world did we get this idea?? 

The one that says, “moms aren’t allowed to like their lives, ‘cause if they do, they’re not being unselfish and that’s not allowed”?

Look – “It is not selfish to set up your life in a way that suits you.” (Allie Casazza.)

Are you having trouble with that? Is it too radical for you?

I know you’re practically a martyr to your idea of what a family should be…. But what effect is that having on your kids?

You’ve got this!

Alyssa

Free up your time as a work-at-home mom: https://yourunbusylife.com/ 

And if you need the right answers (both for the kid side of your life AND your “what’s next” project list), I’ve got two intensive spots open this month - where I’ll help you free up 3 hours each day!

‘Cause there’s no need to hold onto every to-do + commitment in your life (when you’re sick of the calendar jenga game).

And right now you feel like you’re in conflict - with your clients, your kids, your partner, or even yourself (because of your own needs). You fear the next family season - the parenting issue that’s going to crop up - the marriage breakdown behind the scenes - the feast-and-famine cycle in your clients - the next issue with team that’s going to unexpectedly explode.

Which is where I come in to help you create win-win solutions for yourself + your family that support business growth, team scaling, & client operations without compromising any key part of your life.

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Transcript

This is the Unbusy Mom, and today we’re talking about whether this counts as “being too selfish” when you’re a business mom - ‘cause I don’t think so.

Where in the world did we get this idea?! The one that says, “moms aren’t allowed to like their lives, ‘cause if they do, they’re not being unselfish and that’s not allowed”?

Look – “It is not selfish to set up your life in a way that suits you.” That’s a quote from Allie Casazza, and I think it’s really applicable right now.

Hear that again: it’s not selfish to set up your life in the way that suits YOU.

Are you having trouble with that thought? Is it too radical for you?

If so, then let me give it to you straight for just a minute.

How are you going to explain to your kids what it means to monitor their energy during the day? Make sure they’ve got enough juice to keep going through, say, college classes, then head off to an intramural football game, do some studying, write that paper, and oh, yeah, hang out with friends? 

When do they draw the line? When do they say, “Sorry, I’ve got to sleep?” 

It all comes down to energy.

And if you – the mom – don’t know how to run your own day, how do you think you’re ever going to be able to teach THEM?

Maybe you’re saying, “Oh, I DO know my own day – I just don’t do it, ‘cause, that mom thing. The ‘don’t be selfish’ one.”

Yeah, right. I know you’re being unselfish – you’re practically being a martyr to do it – but what effect is that example going to have on your kids? Have you ever thought about that?

Will your kids ever want to grow up, to take on families and responsibilities of their own, if all they hear from you is “life was great, then I got married and had a family, and now it’s work-work-work all the time ‘cause that’s what adults do”?

Is THAT going to motivate them to get a job out in the real world, have kids of their own, pull their weight and all that good stuff?

Uh, no, I don’t think so. 

If you tell them – by your actions, not your words – day in and day out for 18 years that the REAL mark of being a grown-up is to quit having fun, never enjoy anything again, and become a working machine…. How likely are they to choose your quote unquote responsible life path?

Aren’t they going to want to sluff off responsibilities, put off their career as long as possible, maybe move back home, and by all means avoid marriage or children if that’s going to mean (gasp) cooking and cleaning for a household of people? Or diaper changes?

So if you won’t do it for yourself, do it for them.

For the lives you want your children to have.

For the men and women that they marry.

For the grandkids you want them to carry.

Do it for them – and for you. ‘Cause God feels compassion for the both of you. (And I do, too.)

And if you’re in a funk and can’t get out, make sure the day-to-day of your business is taken care of - all the content is pre-scheduled - serve any clients or fulfill any projects and answer any course questions you need to - and then spend the rest of the time on stuff for your family or doing whatever you want around the house. (Or just doing nothing!) 

You either need a break to get some fresh inspiration; a break to physically rest; or a break to gain clarity on a new direction that’s coming up for you. So sometimes God lets you “run out” of things to do for your business, and MAKES you rest. 

(Yes, it’s inconvenient to our high-achiever personalities sometimes. But He’s God, so He gets to make the call. Trust me, I’ve experienced this LOTS of times.)

And each time, know that you WILL move through that funk.

There IS another side. 

All you have to do is trust that you’ll get there.

Because when you hold the core belief that fewer work hours are possible for you - withOUT dropping the ball? That’s when this mindset stuff REALLY pays off. 

Because it all starts flowing together and serendipitously happening for you - even when you had NO idea how you were gonna make that task list stack-up fit.

But somehow, it just does.

THAT’S the magic of rewiring your scheduling beliefs inside my work/life balance program - and then following that up with the CALENDARING part that actually REMINDS you to make that happen.

And once you try THIS way of balancing the mom and business owner hats, you’ll never want to go back. Because it’s ALL so much easier on you.

What do you say - are you ready to infuse more ease and flow state into your workload today?