Cycle Breaker and Change Maker | Introduction to the Five F's of Trauma Response

If you’ve been following along, you know that I like to take a deep dive into how trauma shapes our behaviors and responses to the world around us. Today, I’m introducing something that will lay the foundation for our next few episodes: the Five F’s of Trauma Response.

This is a concept that explains how our brains and bodies react when we feel threatened, even if the threat is no longer present. Trauma lives in the body, and because of that, our responses are not always logical. Sometimes, we find ourselves reacting in ways that don’t seem to make sense. We may feel like we’re constantly fighting, running away, shutting down, appeasing others, or feeling completely helpless—and that’s because these are all deeply ingrained survival instincts.

In today’s episode, I’m going to introduce each of the Five F’s, give you examples of how they might show up in daily life, and explain why recognizing these responses is so crucial for healing. In future episodes, I’ll explore each of these in more depth.

The Five F’s—Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn, and Flop—are the ways our nervous system responds to danger. These are instinctive reactions, shaped by past experiences, and often occur before we even have time to think.

1. Fight: The fight response is the instinct to confront a threat head-on. This might look like anger, defensiveness, or an intense need to be in control. People who default to the fight response may often find themselves arguing, feeling like they have to prove themselves, or reacting aggressively in situations where they feel challenged. It’s a way of trying to regain a sense of power.
2. Flight: If fight isn’t an option, flight might be. This response makes you want to escape—either physically by leaving a situation or mentally by staying busy and distracted. People with a dominant flight response may avoid confrontation, overwork themselves, or feel like they can never sit still. They’re always on the move, always looking for an exit.
3. Freeze: Sometimes, the brain decides that neither fighting nor fleeing is an option, so it shuts down instead. The freeze response can feel like mental fog, dissociation, or being unable to act when faced with stress. If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in a situation where you knew you needed to do something but couldn’t move, that’s freeze in action.
4. Fawn: The fawn response is about appeasement—seeking safety by pleasing others. People who have learned to fawn often prioritize other people’s needs at the expense of their own. They may struggle with saying no, setting boundaries, or speaking up for themselves because they’ve learned that keeping the peace is the safest option.
5. Flop: The lesser-known flop response is when the body completely shuts down. This is the experience of feeling powerless, exhausted, and unable to take action. People who experience this may find themselves giving up easily, feeling helpless, or struggling with extreme fatigue when faced with stress.

Transcript

Episode 24: Introduction to the Five F’s of Trauma Response

Hello and welcome back to the Cycle Breaker and Change Maker podcast. If you’ve been following along, you know that I like to take a deep dive into how trauma shapes our behaviors and responses to the world around us. Today, I’m introducing something that will lay the foundation for our next few episodes: the Five F’s of Trauma Response.

This is a concept that explains how our brains and bodies react when we feel threatened, even if the threat is no longer present. Trauma lives in the body, and because of that, our responses are not always logical. Sometimes, we find ourselves reacting in ways that don’t seem to make sense. We may feel like we’re constantly fighting, running away, shutting down, appeasing others, or feeling completely helpless—and that’s because these are all deeply ingrained survival instincts.

In today’s episode, I’m going to introduce each of the Five F’s, give you examples of how they might show up in daily life, and explain why recognizing these responses is so crucial for healing. In future episodes, I’ll explore each of these in more depth.

What Are the Five F’s of Trauma Response?

The Five F’s—Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn, and Flop—are the ways our nervous system responds to danger. These are instinctive reactions, shaped by past experiences, and often occur before we even have time to think.

1. Fight: The fight response is the instinct to confront a threat head-on. This might look like anger, defensiveness, or an intense need to be in control. People who default to the fight response may often find themselves arguing, feeling like they have to prove themselves, or reacting aggressively in situations where they feel challenged. It’s a way of trying to regain a sense of power.
2. Flight: If fight isn’t an option, flight might be. This response makes you want to escape—either physically by leaving a situation or mentally by staying busy and distracted. People with a dominant flight response may avoid confrontation, overwork themselves, or feel like they can never sit still. They’re always on the move, always looking for an exit.
3. Freeze: Sometimes, the brain decides that neither fighting nor fleeing is an option, so it shuts down instead. The freeze response can feel like mental fog, dissociation, or being unable to act when faced with stress. If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in a situation where you knew you needed to do something but couldn’t move, that’s freeze in action.
4. Fawn: The fawn response is about appeasement—seeking safety by pleasing others. People who have learned to fawn often prioritize other people’s needs at the expense of their own. They may struggle with saying no, setting boundaries, or speaking up for themselves because they’ve learned that keeping the peace is the safest option.
5. Flop: The lesser-known flop response is when the body completely shuts down. This is the experience of feeling powerless, exhausted, and unable to take action. People who experience this may find themselves giving up easily, feeling helpless, or struggling with extreme fatigue when faced with stress.

Why This Matters

Each of these responses is a survival mechanism. At some point, they helped keep you safe. But if they continue to shape your behavior in ways that don’t serve you anymore, it can be exhausting and overwhelming.

For example, if your trauma response is fight, you may find yourself constantly on edge, reacting with anger even when it’s not necessary. If your response is flight, you might struggle with feeling like you’re always running from your problems. If you freeze, you might feel stuck, unable to move forward. If you fawn, you might struggle with maintaining your own identity and needs. And if you flop, you may feel like you don’t have the energy to change your situation at all.

So here’s my question for you: Which of these responses do you resonate with the most? Do you see yourself in one or more of these patterns?

Understanding your primary trauma response is the first step toward healing. And over the next few episodes, I’m going to help you do just that. We’re going to explore each of these responses in-depth, talk about how they shape our relationships and behaviors, and discuss practical steps to regain control.

My Experience

Before I wrap up today’s episode, I want to share a little bit about my personal experience with these trauma responses. For most of my life, I thought I was just someone who worked hard, avoided conflict, and began to feel exhausted all the time. What I didn’t realize was that I was switching between flight, fawn, and flop responses without even knowing it.

I was always keeping myself busy—running from my own thoughts. I had trouble saying no, even when it meant sacrificing my own well-being. And when things got too overwhelming, I would completely shut down.

Recognizing these patterns in myself was the first step toward changing them. And that’s why I’m so passionate about sharing this with you—because once you understand what’s happening, you can start making choices that align with your healing, rather than your past trauma.

Final Thoughts

That’s it for today’s episode. I hope this introduction to the Five F’s of Trauma Response has given you something to think about. Over the next few episodes, we’ll be diving deeper into each response, breaking them down, and giving you tools to start working through them.

If this episode resonated with you, I’d love to hear from you. Let me know which of these responses you recognize in yourself. And if you think this episode could help someone else, please share it with them.

Thank you for being here. Thank you for listening. And remember—healing is a journey, and you are not alone.