Talking to elders about money

Most preachers don’t learn how to talk to elders about money in school—they learn it the hard way. 

In this episode, I start with my own bad example and trace the lessons that came from awkward questions, unspoken assumptions, and embarrassing moments. 

From unpaid vacations to refusing a raise out of fear, to discovering the wisdom of written agreements, this is an honest, practical conversation about money, trust, and leadership. 

If you’re a preacher, an elder, or anyone who cares about healthy church relationships, this episode may save you years of confusion—and a few sleepless nights.

Listen to episode 41, Refusing a raise

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Transcript

 090 Talking to Elders About Money

 
Most preachers don’t learn how to talk to elders about money in school—they learn it the hard way. 

In this episode, I start with my own bad example and trace the lessons that came from awkward questions, unspoken assumptions, and embarrassing moments. 

From unpaid vacations to refusing a raise out of fear, to discovering the wisdom of written agreements, this is an honest, practical conversation about money, trust, and leadership. 

If you’re a preacher, an elder, or anyone who cares about healthy church relationships, this episode may save you years of confusion—and a few sleepless nights.

Brian Oldfield is credited with the statement, “No man is entirely worthless; he can always serve as a bad example.” I’ll begin by telling you how I did it wrong.
 
The church where I did my first work had never had a full-time preacher. We didn’t talk much about money. The elders said they thought I’d need $100.00 a week. I said I’d take it. We lived on a budget and made it.
 
 After nine months, I requested a week off for vacation. Gail asked me how we’d make our car payment. I told her, “It’s in the budget.” Her reply, “They won’t pay us for the week we’re gone.” My response, “Everybody knows you get a week or two off a year for vacation.” Gail was right.
 
 When I returned without a check for the week, I asked the elders what their policy was regarding a preacher taking a week off for vacation. Would there be any pay? They said they’d never had a preacher, and they didn’t have a policy. One elder said, “He didn’t do nothing. Don’t give him nothing.” They agreed. I learned it’s good to talk about things like that before you start.
 
 When I moved to the next church, we agreed on vacation with pay, weeks off for gospel meetings, and reimbursement for lecture expenses. They said if they asked me to leave or I decided to go to another church, they’d pay me for ninety days, or until I moved to another location, whichever came first. I had a larger salary. It was good.
 
 My first conflict about money came when the elders offered me a raise. I’d so afraid of talking about money that I refused it. I’s scared people would think I’s preaching for money. I’ll put a link in the show notes about that: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2369804/episodes/16536719

The elders were kind and understanding. A few months later, they asked me if I’d help them. I’s glad to do that. What was it? They said people were asking if they’d given me a raise. They hadn’t because I refused it. They said it’d be helpful to them if I would accept a few more dollars each week. I wanted to please, and reluctantly, I accepted more money.
 
 In 1971, when our second baby was born without insurance, the elders approached me again. They told me my raise for the year was to join Farm Bureau, take out Blue Cross-Blue Shield family health insurance, and the church’d pay it. That was our first insurance.
 
 About seven years after moving there, I began to feel a pinch in my finances. I’s scared. I dreaded it, but I asked for a raise. I approached the elders by showing them our budget. I listed each category, along with the amount we’d been spending and what we thought we needed to spend. I told them I needed the amount in each category or advice on how to buy those items for less. They gave me a raise. That was my first mature conversation with elders about money. I was fortunate to’ve been treated well by kind elders.

As I’s leaving that congregation, someone asked, “Are we paying Jerrie every Sunday he’s running all over the country trying to find a job?” The treasurer said they were. Next question, “What about it, Jerrie?” My answer, “When I came here eight years ago, the elders and I agreed I’d be paid up to ninety days to relocate if they asked me to leave or if I resigned.”

Only one of the three elders who agreed was still alive. Someone asked him, “What about it, brother?” He answered, “It… seems… like …we… talked about that,… but… I don’t… remember… what… we… said.” That’s the first time I thought it would’ve been good to have written agreements. Since then, my philosophy on written agreements is, “The only people who don’t need written agreements are people who’re never going to die and who’ll never forget anything.” Others need to write it, sign it, file it, back it up to Dropbox, copy it to an external hard drive, and put it in the Cloud with the original in a safety deposit box.

The treasurer’d been with the congregation since its inception. After some discussion, he said, “Brethren, we’ve had this ninety-day agreement with every preacher. We paid them when they were relocating, and we’ll pay Jerrie.” The person asking the question was satisfied, and the discussion ended. That was close and embarrassing.

In the next church I had my first written contract and job description. The agreements about finances:

1. The salary shall be $450.00 per week. (52 weeks per year)
2. The church shall pay all social security. Actually, a church can’t pay a preacher’s Social Security, but they can give him money to pay it. He pays it, counting it as additional income. It’d be ready for January 15, April 15, June 15, and September 15 quarterly estimated payments to the IRS.)
3. The church shall pay all medical insurance.
4. A cost-of-living adjustment will be made each year.
5. A merit raise will be considered annually, and the reasons for granting or not granting it will be discussed.

At the end of the first year, I received a cost-of-living adjustment but no merit raise and no discussion. I talked to one of the elders: “I know I don’t deserve a merit raise. If I had, you’d have given it to me. Please tell me what I need to do to receive a merit raise.” Soon, he told me the elders discussed it and thought I should have a merit raise. That was helpful. My experience is that written agreements by themselves don’t solve all problems. People forget. Each party must hold the other party responsible.

Over the next decade, the process proceeded smoothly, with minimal discussions about finances.

The time to talk about money is before the church pays the preacher his first check. A contract settles conflicts before they start: specify vacation time, days off, time off for gospel meetings, workshops, summer series, and lectureships. When someone questions or forgets, read the agreements. Everyone’s memory’ll be the same after referring to the written word.
 
A preacher should ask for what he wants and needs. Different churches have different policies and personalities.

I always enjoyed a Christmas bonus. Gail and I used the money to take a short getaway between Christmas and January 1. Some churches gave a gift at Christmas. I moved to a church where Santa Claus didn’t come. One year, as we discussed the upcoming agreements, the elders informed me of my raise. I thanked them, then asked for a $10.00 decrease per week. They agreed. I asked them to give me a check for $520.00 on the Sunday before Christmas. We were all happy.
 
 Money is a powerful subject. It’s a good way to predict how we’ll get along on other issues. It’s essential to discuss thoroughly when considering working with a church. Continue to develop your ability to discuss this topic and other vital issues in your relationships with elders and others.

And after more than 64 years of preaching, I give this wisdom:

When the elders offer you a raise,… don’t… say,… “No.”

Say, “Thank you!”