Podcast 67: Where to Meet Godly Men

If you’ve ever said, “There are no good men out there,” this episode will lovingly shake that belief — and show you exactly where the high-value, godly men actually are.

Michelle reveals the three types of spaces where Christian men consistently show up — and how you can start putting yourself in those rooms with strategy, joy, and boldness (not desperation). You’ll walk away seeing just how many possibilities you’ve been missing… and how to start showing up like the woman who gets chosen.

And if you’re ready to stop spinning your wheels and actually go where love is waiting — Michelle’s coaching gives you a personalized Connection Injection™ list based on your city, your interests, and the kind of man you’re praying for. You’ll know where to go and how to connect with confidence.

Book your consultation today at www.thechristiandatingcoach.com — and let’s get you married, sis.

Transcript

Michelle Joiner (00:00)
Hey, hey, sis. If I had a dollar for every time I heard a woman say, there's no good men out there, there's no good men left, I'd be fully funded for life. The real issue is not always that they don't exist. It's that you haven't put yourself in the right rooms yet.

God is a very powerful God. God is the creator of the universe. He is the author of life. He is the savior of our souls. And he has faithful followers. He has faithful men that are being true to his word and that are ready to build a kingdom marriage with you. You're just not putting yourself

in the rooms with those men, those types of men hang out in certain places. And I am here to tell you where those places are today. So a lot of times, you're anything like me, your life looks kind of like this. Go to church, go home, go to work, go home. Go to the gym, go home. Hang out at your friend's house, go home.

And there's just no space there to meet the type of guy that you're looking for. Because unless you are looking for a TV repairman, there are places that you need to be going to me meeting more men. And I'm going to tell you, sometimes meeting more men doesn't necessarily mean you meet your husband.

if that makes sense. Let me explain what I mean. Sometimes meeting more men just is about giving yourself the confidence that the type of man that you want exists. Like how would you like to have your mindset be broadened to where now you know that there are amazing guys everywhere.

That God is on the move that your Pinterest wedding is right around the corner that you are a magnet for amazing men You're always meeting amazing men. How would you like to have that mindset? Instead of like walking around like I'm not meeting anybody good guys aren't there only me jerks. I only meet low value men No, how would you like to revolutionize those thoughts to I'm a magnet for amazing godly men sound good, right?

It starts with your taking action. It starts with your being out in the world meeting these godly men. So let me tell you where to go. The first place that I want you to think about are faith based spaces. So this strategic category that you're looking at is your shared beliefs. The things that you believe that you want your guy to believe or that you want to be around guys that believe.

Most women are just going to their church and maybe their Bible study. And that is the only faith space that they go to. And I just want to offer to you that if you are desirous of a husband, you might want to increase the number of faith spaces that you are a part of. Now I'm not telling you to leave your church. I'm not. I'm not telling you to go church hopping. I am not.

But it is okay to visit other churches, even churches out of town, even churches a little bit of a distance from you. I want you to think about the churches that you know of that has singles groups or that has a different singles group from yours, new people, new guys. What if you just became someone who visited that church every once in a while and got to know and cultivate relationships at that church?

For me, I would fly to other churches when I was single. I really, really admired John MacArthur. So I would fly to his church. I met so many good girlfriends, girlfriends I still have today. I met so many guys. Now, I didn't marry any of them, but my mind was 100 % sold on the fact that they were godly people.

that I could connect with everywhere, everywhere. So visit other churches. The other place I want you to think about visiting is Christian concerts, Christian conferences, Christian retreats. Now, the church that you go to might not offer a conference, it might not offer concerts or retreats, but you can get on the internet and find places to visit.

that are more of an experience and a time of refreshment than just going to your church. I love a good Christian concert. love a good Christian concert. It's so powerful to me. It's so meaningful. It's so special. You could always talk to the people around you. They are people that love the Lord too.

I want you to think about though conferences sometimes we go to conferences and we get kind of caught up in the I'm sure I'll meet someone here and you know, you're not gonna meet someone there. So choose conferences that are ministry minded, teaching minded, doctrine minded that is more apt to pull guys doctrine good solid doctrine teaching conferences are gonna pull

guys a lot more than anything more feelings or or or be careful of the language of the conference. then also too, if you know that a conference historically, even if it's a singles conference, but you know it historically only pulls women, then maybe don't go to that. Like I said, men are more likely to go to a ministry teaching conference and doctrine conference.

than anything else. that's that's kind of where your jam could be to meet some amazing guys. And then also just know that men are apt to do to do things, right? So I want you to think about volunteering opportunities or missions organizations, or again, the more ministry type of thing like men are men are drawn to that. And I will tell you that if you meet a guy there, you're likely to have met

Quite an amazing guy. Be willing to go alone. Be willing to go solo. You are more approachable when you're not buried in a friend group. And also you are a lot more attentive to people around you and to forming new connections when you're not already like kind of got your like your security blanket relationship with you. So remember you're not sure topping here.

positioning yourself with intention. Alright, so the next strategic category would be shared passions. So that's interest based spaces. I want you to think about the hobbies that make you come alive. For me, it was board games and hiking groups and swing dancing for you, it might be salsa or art classes or sports leagues. So

If you love volleyball, join a volleyball league. Join a volleyball team. So fun. For me, I want you to think about, think about the fact, like when I was single, I was always dancing. I really would dance every night of the week if I could. And I literally probably was dancing committedly every Monday, Thursday, and Friday.

I was gaming. I am not gaming. I'm not really a video gamer, but I love board games. If you follow me on Instagram, you see I'm always playing board games with Caleb. I was just living like a whole life. Men notice that. Not only is that good for you, that's super attractive to guys. They want to be a part of your amazing life. Do what you love, what makes you glow. Just know that that glow is attractive.

What do you want to do? What do you like to do? I got into triathlons and 5Ks. I'm not gonna tell you, listen, if you're looking for a hot guy, check out those triathlons. This is also too, a lot of people don't think about this, but you don't always have to participate in these events just to be around them. I had a client who would volunteer at races and she met the

the guys like the guys like were ripped and in shape because they were they were doing races they were doing marathons and triathlon so that's just a little pro tip wink wink if you're looking like for one of those guys just volunteer at those events you don't have to do the triathlon but you can volunteer there and meet the hot guys if that's something that's fun to you at that if you're passionate about that if you love being around athletics

Let that be a part of your life. Don't be afraid that you're not good at it. You can still go participate because I want you to think about I want you to think about like sports like there's always the fan based the service based and then the athletic space right there's a whole lot of room to participate in something beautiful like athletics Board games you can learn how to play board games dancing. You can learn how to dance. Don't be afraid to be a beginner

All right, and then I also wanna share one more strategic category, and that is values. Now, one of the values that I certainly had was growth and also career. was my value to have a strong career and to be growing myself. So I want you to be thinking about

Toastmasters is a great place to meet people. It's also a great place to To become better at speaking. I know that a part of the reason why I can speak so Easily today is because I was in toast masters for like a decade. I have no trouble and social opportunities So listen if you are one of those people like I was mentioning last week who struggles with social anxiety It might be hard at first

but join Toastmasters. You'll get practice talking when you're nervous. You'll get practice talking spontaneously. You'll get practice at talking intelligently. It will be so good for you and you'll meet amazing people. So I want you to think networking events, business meetups, workshops. Like these men at these events care about growth and purpose and leadership. All right?

The conversations here are better than at bars. The lighting is better too and everything in general. Like these types of spaces call it high value, high quality leadership med. So go join them. Now, when you are in these rooms, these three different rooms that I described, here's what to say. You've got to remember to say this when you see someone interesting.

This is my go-to phrases.

It was really nice meeting you. Do you want to exchange content info and stay in touch? I am telling you sis Nobody is going to say no to this. Okay, I take it back. I've heard of one person saying no to this I think it was like a celebrity like someone said this to a celebrity and they said, that's okay because they were a celebrity but any normal human person will say yes to this

This is a hard thing to say even as a woman to another woman. This requires a level of of boldness that it might take some building up to so say it to women because honestly women are great for networking to if you become close to a woman at these events, what kind of people does she know? Maybe she knows someone that would be great for you. This one line

builds your bonus, grows your network, and opens the door to deeper connections. So say it to men and women. Friendships matter too. Now, if you're thinking to yourself, all right, this is good, but like, this just takes a lot of work. I don't really wanna do this. I hear you.

but this is meant to expand your value and to grow your value and to make your life more fun. So if the options that I suggested don't sound fun to you, then just go back to those categories. Remember what the categories were. Shared values, shared passions, and shared faith, shared belief. Go back to those spaces and be like, where else can I go in those spaces?

Right? Your future husband may be in your same city or in the same room as you go into, but you'll never know if you don't go. Don't wait for him to find you hiding in your house. Go live your life in a way that lights you up and let him find you there.

Success.

If this spoke to you and you're like, wow, this sounds amazing, but you know what? I cannot do this on my own. One of the things that I do for my clients is I listen to them. get their, I get their heart. I get their interest. I get their energy and I create for them a list, a customized list of places to go locally where they can meet these types of

Compatible high value men and they get a list that's personalized for them And so my clients are meeting amazing guys Just like I'm telling you I have Clients all around the world that get these lists. It doesn't matter what country you live in It doesn't even matter what language you speak I have a proprietary method for creating these amazing connection injection lists like I'm telling you about

Then I coach my clients on what to say and how to feel confident while they're saying it No, if this sounds amazing to you, it's because it is and I would love to have you join me as a Client I would love to help have you join me and get coaching from me. I would love to support you so if you're feeling the draw if you're following the pull if you're like You know what Michelle's got some great tips, but I need her help

I can't just listen to these tips. Now that she told me what to do, I need to know how to do it. How do I do this? How do I show up in these rooms? And which rooms are the best for me? I can help you with that. What I want you to do right now is go to my website, thechristiandatingcoach.com and book a call to talk to me. Meet me on a consult. We'll discuss if coaching is the perfect fit for you to help you feel more confident, overcome social anxiety, find your person.

and get married. Sound good? Let's get you married, sis.