Clinical Psychologist Bethany Teachman PhD: How to Deal with Election Anxiety; How to Talk to Friends and Family Who Don't Share Your Beliefs; Is it Just the Election?; Tactics to Stop Doom-Scrolling.

Bethany Teachman is a Clinical Psychologist whose research focuses on how biased thinking contributes to anxiety disorders. She is a professor of Psychology and Director of Clinical Training at the University of Virginia  and an expert on anxiety.
 
At the University of Virginia, she runs the Program for Anxiety, Cognition, and Treatment lab which studies cognitive bias modification and uses digital technologies, such as apps and web-based cognitive bias modification programs, in attempts to shift anxious thinking. 
She is on the governing board of The Society for Digital Mental Health.

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Transcript

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In your practice. How have things changed in particular in this election cycle, as far as people's anxiety and depression? Yeah, I think we see it both, you know, in our therapy practices, but also just in daily life, as we're talking to friends and families ourselves, right? It's a pervasive challenge right now with, you know, over 70% of people saying that they're really experiencing pretty high levels of election anxiety right now. So this is a really common challenge that people are experiencing. I think that there are three factors that I'd identify that make managing this election cycle particularly challenging. The first is that we're in a 24/7, news cycle, and so it's really easy to get overwhelmed by it. So you can sort of have this kind of pervasive, you know, whether you're Doom scrolling or whatever it is that's kind of pulling you in. You can sort of be constantly bombarded with these really threatening, negative messages, headlines that say our democracy is at stake. You know, all of these kinds of things that can make it feel really overwhelming. And it can be really take over in a way where you don't get breaks. And so that's one piece that I think is causing it to be really challenging for for some people right now. Second piece is that we are so polarized, and yet the polls are so incredibly tight that people are having to tolerate a really high level of uncertainty. And we know that tolerating that uncertainty tends to breed anxiety for a lot of people, especially individuals who are more vulnerable to anxiety. And so we are being asked to sort of handle this uncertainty at unusually high level, this round. And so I think that's adding to a lot of the challenge for people. And then the third piece is, I think because of people feeling some distrust in the institutions, feeling like society's not working the way that it's supposed to, not only tied to the elections, but in other domains as well. There's a lot of other scary news stories that are out there right now. And so it leads people to have this sort of sense of powerlessness, and when you feel like you don't have control over the important outcomes in your life, that makes it extra charge to manage, it extra hard to manage, it. The good thing is that by identifying those three factors, each of them has different actions a person can take to try to help manage the stress that they're causing. I'm a doom scroller, you know, and and I used to, I used to really pride myself on having control over my subconscious mind and over habits, habits like that. But carrying this, carrying this thing around, you know, in a moment, going, let's see, you know, and Gib makes the points that that the folks that are making money off of this, they know what our habits are now. They know they want, they want us to have that feeling, because that mean the same the same network, the networks, they're all, they all do the same thing that that engage you and make you feel bad and uncertain, then spend their commercial breaks selling you medication that stabilizes you for your uncertainty. So it's, it's like, it's it to me, I can see the the thing I mean, one of the ways I cope as I like to engage on on sports, because it creates a lot of the context of of of dealing with, you know, joy and hardship and perseverance, all of that, without the feeling of the stakes of of of politics. So like, you know, I it's helpful to have that, to be able to engage with people like, how about those rams? How about the it? It's a good it's a good medium to be able to to engage with that, with people without having to worry about it's where, you know, if I have friends that support the Yankees, and it does not feel as it does not feel, it. I don't get as angry about us supporting opposing teams as we are made to believe we should be about people supporting opposing parties, and that is a useful tool for me. But you gave us three, three main causes of anxiety. Said, our powerlessness, our constant engagement and then and then and then, our difficulty managing uncertainty. Yeah, our disillusion with the with the uncertainty. What? And you said there are specific things for each of those. What are those specific things? Yeah, absolutely. You know. I want to say, first and foremost, that, you know, none of these are like, Oh, this completely solves the problem. And no, five minutes or less, we'll carry your ink. So, you know, clearly it's not that. And I also would want to frame this that I actually think some anxiety is a perfectly healthy adaptive response to a stressful situation. So I talk to people about the goal is to figure out, how do you manage the impact of anxiety in your life? Our goal is not to eliminate anxiety, right? Anxiety motivates us. It's a really important communication signal. It tells us that there are threats in our environment we want to respond to. We don't want to eliminate that, but we don't want it to paralyze us. So on the sort of feeling overwhelmed Doom scrolling side of things, there's two parts. One is thinking about, how do you want to manage your media consumption? And I don't believe there's a one size fits all answer to this, right? It's really trial. An error to figure out what works for you. So some people, I talk to, what they need to do is really manage their total time. For other people, it's more about when they check the news and putting particular boundaries on that, for example, not checking right before they go to bed, because then they're not sleeping and they're not sleeping has all kinds of other downstream negative effects. For other people, it's about like actually paying more attention to what sites they're looking at, because they partly to get more accurate information, maybe to get more balanced information. For others, it's about like, intentionally seeking out some positive stories. So hope scrolling, you know that alternative to doom scrolling of trying to get a little more balance in there and then, for other people, it's like, very intentionally, like, I am going for a walk and the phone is nowhere near is not coming with me, right? And taking those like concrete breaks, I don't believe there's one right answer to this. I What I encourage people to do is like, be a mini scientist. Say these are the two things I want to try this week that I think will help me manage how I regulate media, try them see what happens to your mood and adjust accordingly. There's a parallel with it, though, which is just to say it's not, you know, sometimes I think we have this conversation. We sort of said, well, if we could just manage how we engage with social media or online activities, that'll solve the problem. I don't think that's true. The issue is also like, what are you doing with the rest of your life? Right? So, you know, do you have a balance of other activities? Are you going to play sports in addition to watching them? Are you doing things that are fun and relaxing, things that help you meet your goals, things that distract you, things that you know? Are you getting sleep? All of those other things the rest of your life matters too. In it's not only the media consumption. Part of what's also really hard right now is that this is raising, you know, questions about people's identity, about how they think about themselves, what they value. It feels bigger than just a political choice. As you said, this isn't just Mets versus Yankees, right? This feels like it's tied to a whole lot of bigger issues, and so not just for yourself, figuring out, like, hey, what does it mean about me if I vote for this person? Does that mean I'm also on board with X views, or whatever it happens to be, but also, gosh, these people that I love, my friends, my family, they're making choices that are different than mine. What does that mean about who they are and whether we can be friends, and what our values are and all? So it's, you know, I do think there's actually a lot of parallels with the teenage space, with what we're going through right now, what, what would you say is the most dangerous thing that we can do right now, during this time, shut down, you know, obviously expressing hate to others, and those kinds of things are, you know, would be first and foremost, I think, as a non helpful thing to do. But in terms of for things that, you know, how we manage the stress of it, there's a strong urge when we feel depression, when we feel anxiety, when we feel high stress, to just kind of really withdraw and go into a bubble or go under the bed covers, you know, whatever it happens to be. And I think that tends not to be very helpful. So things that instead help us to feel socially connected, things that give us some sense of normalcy, doing regular, routine kinds of things is really, really helpful, but also doing things that give you a sense of agency to like, respond to that powerlessness feeling. And I say to people like, activism doesn't just have to be like, I'm gonna go canvas and knock on doors. That's a like, very overt, sort of explicit form of it. But you can also do non you know, if you want to still be in the politics side, but do something nonpartisan, you know, you register people to vote or whatever, you know, drive people to the polls, right? But you could also do a lot of things that help you feel like you are living in a way more consistent with your values, and you are making a contribution by thinking about the issues you care about. So let's say you have strong views tied to the issues around immigration that are playing a big role in the election right now. So go volunteer with a refugee community that's nearby, right? Have local impact to help on the issues that you care about. There's lots of ways that you can get involved and have an impact. If you want to do something that isn't that public, like bring like soup to a sick neighbor, all of those kinds of things not only help the other person, but they do a massive amount of good for helping your sense of powerlessness, your sense that you have nothing to contribute to solving the problems that we're dealing with as a society. So if you can fight against that withdrawal, that shutting down, and instead engage, engage with activities that are aligned with your values, engage with people in your life, sometimes engage with different views, so that you don't stay in your bubble, like all of those things I think are so much more helpful than the shutting down, even though that's the instinct. And of course, like take a break when you need a break, all those kinds of things, but don't get paralyzed, because that just perpetuates the problems that you're experiencing and that we're experiencing as a society. The I would say that the holiday that strikes fear into the hearts of so many people is coming up right after the election, and that would be Thanksgiving dinner. First of all, I mean, it's, it's, it really is the it's the cornerstone of many great films, too. You know, totally. How do we deal with that? Yeah. So, you know, I encourage people to think about, what are their goals for different social connections, and to have a balance of of engagements that meet those right? So there'll be a time where maybe you talk to the aunt at the Thanksgiving dinner who like you, share views, and you have a quiet moment in the kitchen and connect. That's your social goal of finding like minded community. Great. That's a really important type of social connection to get. Maybe there's the part where you just need a little distraction, and so that's where you go to the kids table at Thanksgiving and you have some fun, and you talk about the latest LEGO Movie, and you know what they were for Halloween, and all those good kinds of things. That's a great social connection, and a great part of Thanksgiving that gives you a little bit of a break. Then there's the parts where you sit down with the person who's like, apolitical, your grandmother, and you have a conversation just about like, you know, the food and how it was made, or whatever it happens to be, and that's your like, social connection. That's your normalcy. And then when you're ready, you have a bit of conversation, if you choose to do so, with the people who have different ideas than you, right? You can set boundaries on how you do it. You can decide if you think it'll go well and it's worth doing, or if you think you want to say, like, hey, let's just enjoy dinner and not have this be part of the conversation. There isn't a right or wrong, but it doesn't have to be. The whole meal. Is the screaming match like most of the movie, right? Well, it's definitely a factor. Yeah, it's a by the, by the, you know, third glass of wine, the the idea of talking to somebody who's diametrically opposed politically starts to become a lot more appealing, and then the way they approach it becomes a lot less productive. Exactly. So, like thinking, you know, so part of it is actually, you know, think in advance about your particular family structure and what's going to work well in that situation. So I just, I don't believe in, like, here's the one answer that works for every family. I do think it's important to think ahead about like what, what you think will be productive or won't be productive. If you're having those conversations, you know, the advice is to have them in a way where you try to come from a point of listening and trying to understand the other person's perspective, rather than starting off from a judgmental place, and it being a, you know, screaming match and all those kinds of things, try to assume good intent where you can, you know, all of those things that help for like, just healthy communication apply here. But I also think it's reasonable to check in with yourself about, like, Are you in good shape to have this conversation? Either because of the alcohol, the sleep, your stress level, how it went in, you know, November 5, and how you how you're feeling about right, like, all of those kinds of things that may determine, is this a good time to have that conversation, or is it not? And some of what I think about is also not just like, how productive Is it likely to be, but how important is it that we have the conversation for our relationship? So there are some people where we can disagree, and that's kind of okay, like we don't need to come to a great understanding, and maybe we ignore that piece of it with other people, though it's like this is affecting our relationship, and I care about you and I love you, and we need to figure out how to continue to love and care about one another while we have differences, and so we need to have that conversation. I still probably wouldn't do it during Thanksgiving. I would do it, you know, do it afterwards. But, you know, it's a judgment call of like, is, is it likely to be productive, and whether or not it is, do we need to have it? Because this is, this is your relationship really matters and it's affecting it. We have a friend is actually his name is Greg, evident, and his dad, I remember going to parties and birthday parties and stuff like that. And every now and then something would erupt. And I remember every time he would just say, You know what, because people would look at him, you know, to be there, to be the referee. Or you go, you know what, I love everybody, and they and they could not tear him out of that, which is, I love everybody. Is that? Is that, is that helpful, or is it, is it divisive? Do you think, I think it's going to depend on the family context, right? There'll be times where, you know, I'm sorry that I'm saying it depends, but I think that's kind of the truth, right? So if you're in a family where people are like, that's a diffuse, you know, helps diffuse the situation. That's great. If you're in a family where that really ticks people off, and they say, Come on, take a side, then that's not going to go so well. So I think it's going to be a bit of a trial and error. But I think regardless that vantage point of saying, like, I love you, and this is really hard, is a much better way to have the conversation, right? Both of those have to coexist in the conversation. So, you know, it sounds like he was going for that, you know, and staying in the it sounds like he was trying to stay neutral and be Switzerland in it a little bit. And sometimes people want you to like. Like, you know, choose an allegiance. So that won't always work, but regardless of which way you go, whether you're Switzerland or you're picking a picking a side again, doing it from that place of saying, I love you, and that's present in this conversation, as well as acknowledging like this is a really tough conversation to have. Yeah, I think it's not the election in isolation, right? We're seeing a sort of confluence of a lot of challenging things that are happening in our world right now. And so that raises people's, like, general stress level. And so it makes adding this on top extra difficult. And I think, you know, part of what's challenging is, is that it's a real marathon. It's not really a sprint. Like Tuesday is probably not going to answer all of our questions, even about, you know, it's not going to answer all of our questions about the outcomes of the election, for starters, right? But even beyond that, the reason that it's so hard right now is the extent of polarization, is the extent of uncertainty is the extent of, you know, all of those other things and those challenges exist even after November 5. So people are really anxious about the next four years and what that leadership is going to look like, and what that's going to mean for this country and the people they love much more than it is about what happens on this day. And so I think we have to help people with kind of acknowledging that, that you can have sadness about it, and yet you can still move on. Because we actually, like we're pretty good at tolerating uncertainty in lots of other areas of our life, right? Like you don't know exactly what's going to happen in your job or in your relationships or in your health or in 8 million other things, right? So we have a lot of practice of tolerating uncertainty, but we don't do a good job in some domains, and I think it's in part because in some domains that we're in, unless we have clear evidence of a problem, we tend to assume safety, right? So you're both sitting in chairs right now, but I doubt you checked the like legs of your chairs to make sure they weren't going to snap. When you sat down, you just sat down because, like, you can't function otherwise we assume, like, a general sense of like, things are okay in this domain. We're not doing that. We are doing this kind of really quick, catastrophic leap of uncertainty equals bad outcome. Uncertainty means I can't handle bad outcomes. And so we have to help people to kind of re evaluate, reframe what it means to not know, to recognize that not knowing is a state we actually can handle. We can think about how we will deal with different ways of different types of outcomes, and how we would actually cope in those situations, but to help with that catastrophic thinking that's going on right now so that it doesn't balloon in the ways that it is. So that's a long answer to say it's a hard time. Yeah, yeah. And, you know, I think Gib had a great, great piece of ice advice, advice too, because it works for me. Would just go for a hard workout too. When you feel like you're Oh, yeah. I mean, yeah. So I if you can, if you can get present in the physical it does a lot, like you mentioned going for a walk, which is fine, but if you can get present in the physical it does a lot for dealing with the anxiety. Because you say anxiety is a good thing, and I hear you, but anxiety is meant to protect us from the saber tooth tiger that might be behind that boulder. It's not meant to make us scared of sending an email, right? And so we have to content. I find it physically working out, but getting into my body contextualize anxiety in a way that is helpful to me. Do you have other practices, other topics and things that we can, we can latch on to, to get us out of that, out of the anxiety, around, particularly around around politics, but around any kind of ungrounded anxiety. Yeah, and maybe there's a link that you could provide us to for people who are who are flooding and need help right away. Sure, yeah. So, you know, I think part of it is helping people to learn. How do you distinguish between a false alarm and a real alarm, right? So, as you said, anxiety is adaptive if you're being taste chased by a bear in the woods, right? It's not so adaptive when we have false alarms going off. So helping to, like, realize, like, wait a second, is there a real emergency right now, or is there not a real emergency? Can be useful as part of it, but exercise, absolutely, going outside, spending time with loved ones, doing things that are not about politics or stressful things, right? Going to watch a funny movie together, all of those things that give you social support, that allow you to have fun, allow you to have some distraction, allow you to relax, all of that's really helpful. And then the other piece I mentioned is doing things that give you meaning, right? So, doing things that allow you to feel like you are making contributions, whether it's in politics or not, all of those things actually can help with managing the anxiety, along with, you know, of course, sleep and all of the basic self care stuff that, you know, is cliche, but actually, like, really important, because we don't do very well when we're not in good shape on those things. But exercise is a beautiful example of. So the range of things that, you know, we need to have a balance of activities in our life that are going to help us, and obviously, like, if you're really, really struggling, and none of these sort of general life suggestions are working for you, you know, seek counseling. There's lots of folks who are able to help with, you know, sort of managing extreme anxiety. It's something we're actually pretty good at treating. But unfortunately, because anxiety leads to avoidance, a lot of people don't come in for the help that they need. Do you have a, do you have a recommendation for for a hotline if things get really bad? Sure. I mean, so, you know, obviously the suicide hotline 988, is a is a good one for if things are really, really bad. But a good place to go is ada.org or abct.org That's the anxiety and depression Association of America, or the association of behavioral and cognitive therapies. Both of those websites have lots of resources available for managing depression, managing anxiety, how to find a therapist in your area, all of those kinds of things, and loads of good resources that can help people. And I have my own recommendation, and it actually comes from an old comic who's no longer with us. His name is Bob Newhart. Oh, I know, yeah. You see these videos? Stephanie, so he does a, he does a series of videos where he plays a psychiatrist and he sits behind the desk. You know, do you know these? Yes, sits behind the desk, and people come in, and they're just go through this whole thing and whole thing. And he's taking notes and everything, and then, and then the person goes, so, so what, you know? What should I do? And he goes, I have, I have it right? Here. He goes. He leans in. He goes, Just stop it. Stop it, right? I haven't seen it. Maybe not the best strategy, yeah, and it's, you know, I recommend watching it, just for the laugh. There is a whole set of very fun experiments where people have shown that when we try to suppress thoughts, it often will rebound for us. So like if I say to you right now, whatever you do, do not think about a pink flamingo. Don't picture the Pink Feathers, don't picture the wings, don't picture the thin legs. Of course, that's the only thing that's going to be on your mind, right? So we've learned that those strategies may not be our best ones, but I'll take Bob Newhart any day for a break. Thank you so much for your help. It's been incredibly helpful, and good luck yourself getting through all of this madness. You as well. You as well. Great to talk with you. Thank you. Bye. Now. Bye.