Smell Coffee to Be Nicer; The Importance of Summer Rituals; Wedding Song Regret

In this episode, we discuss:

Wearing sunglasses before bed for better sleep.

You’re embarrassing your kids at their sporting events.

Become a Professional Patient 

And many more topics.

For more information, and to sign up for our private coaching, visit tesh.com

Our Hosts:
John Tesh: Instagram: @johntesh_ifyl facebook.com/JohnTesh
Gib Gerard: Instagram: @GibGerard facebook.com/GibGerard X: @GibGerard

Transcript

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Gib, hello and welcome to another episode of the podcast. I'm Gib Gerard. Today we are doing yet another episode that is one of my favorite things that we do. Here are select pieces from intelligence for life, the radio show for you in podcast form, where we just let them breathe a little bit more, we talk just a little bit more. So hopefully you guys enjoyed this stuff as much as I did. This is my favorite version of the show that we do. So please enjoy it here without further ado, is intelligence for your life with Gib Gerard myself and John Tesh. So Gib did this just in. There's a recent study that found that 20% a full 20% of dads embarrass their kids when they yell and scream at their sports games. 100% you don't embarrass your son. I Well, first he's doing the same thing, right? Well, first of all, I'm coaching, so I'm supposed to be yelling, but when I'm refereeing, I can see it in the kids. In fact, I've had I've had players when I'm coaching baseball where they like getting literal arguments with their parents were yelling at them from the sidelines, and I can I see what happens to their body language? And we have a good friend, yeah, who we were just hanging out with, who does this? He does now. She doesn't, she doesn't look at him anymore. She has the soccer field. She just ignores him, right? Because they have the same personality. So she just, she, she doesn't allow herself to get embarrassed. But as like a referee and a coach who's on the field with the kids, I can tell you, I can sense when you're yelling is not support, when you're negative and when you're yelling about calls and when you're yelling for different calls and plays to go a certain way. I can sense in the kids how their shoulders slump forward. They do not enjoy it, and it changes the whole temperature of the game. Makes it a lot less fun. FYI, going to a lot of games that your kids are playing in. Yeah, it's not just 20% of dads. No, it's loud. There's some loud moms out there. It's a lot of you, and there's some loud grandparents, okay, all right, we can talk about that later. All right, from our dating relationship files, Gib if they had a do over we now know that 40% of married couples say the one thing they would change about their wedding is their first dance song. I wonder why? I think I've heard some weird choices. I mean, I made a weird choice. I made a weird choice, you know, I I can't remember yours. I was 24 years old, and we chose at last by Ed James, which at last, what was it wasn't that my parents her first day, No, yours was, I'll be loving you. Oh, always. Yeah, at last. Oh, at long last. It's been 24 years on this planet. Finally, we found each other. How do you feel? How do you feel about these people who worked for like, six months with a whole, like, a whole routine, you know, then dad comes out and a grandpa comes out. I feel like, if that's how you want to spend your time and effort, I like that so much more than then spending, you know, a million dollars on flowers, yeah, that's, it's really impressive. I'm sure there's some injuries during rehearsals, though, especially, I can't imagine me doing any of that stuff. I tried to learn a line dance the other day, and I just sat down. There's somebody out there who broke their hip doing wedding dance. Yep, there it is. Gib, we have been doing this for a long time, and and I enjoy every minute of it, and I enjoy every one of the sleep studies that we see, and I see one now, according to a recent sleep study, if you have trouble sleeping, the experts are now saying you should try wearing sunglasses two hours before bedtime. That reduces I know that reduces the light reaching your retinas, so your melatonin kicks in. I'm just thinking of me walking around the house with with like at 830 Mike. But look, think about this. We've talked, how many times have we talked about the fact that blue lights from screens, from television, from computers, from phones, how that affects your sleep and your melatonin? We've even talked about how electric lights, you know, just the light bulb in general, has ruined our sleep because we're now staying up so far past when the sun goes down, with those two things in mind, why wouldn't sunglasses be helpful in terms of resetting your natural circadian rhythms? As soon as the sun goes down, you start wearing sunglasses around the house because all that, or at least get those yellow lights for your light bulbs in the house and turn them down and dim them a little bit, because, of course, the artificial light is keeping you awake. You've got to block the artificial light. Makes sense again, if you have trouble, if you have trouble sleeping, experts say, Try wearing sunglasses two hours before bedtime. Well, Gib, you know, I love this. We now know, according to a Pew Research study, that half of all adults surveyed believe that prayer affects their health in a positive way. Absolutely, yeah. I mean, having been through a 10 year successful cancer battle, I've seen it firsthand. So we've talked about how being quiet, like literally turning off phones and not stimulating your brain in any way, how good that is for you, even journaling or talking about speaking things out loud to yourself. Off all of these things that that are completely agnostic, that we that we've reported on their benefits. Of course, prayer would help. It does all of those things. It does all the things that meditation does, plus there's an added element of hope that's associated with it. And when we have hope, and we have a when we have a belief in a positive outcome, it makes you more likely to have positive outcomes. So you're gonna, you're all of the things that create stress in your body are going to be less when you are praying or meditating on a regular basis. So of course, that's going to have a positive effect on your overall health outcomes. Yeah. Well said. John Tesh with the Master Master coffee engineer, Gib Gerard, we were just on a little mini vacation for my wife's birthday, and he brought along his whole chemistry set, my whole setup, yeah, and there was I found this to be true. So what I'm about to say, studies show that the smell of coffee, just the smell of coffee, even just the beans, will make you a nicer person. Well, yeah, it's the anticipation of that warm beverage and all of the joy and hope that it provides. Of course, the smell of coffee is gonna, is gonna make you more positive. It is. It's an olfactory sensation. It has rich aromas. Plus you get the cafe all of the antioxidants. It's one of the only sources of antioxidant in the standard American diet is a cup of coffee. So yes, the anticipation that comes with the smell, it's gonna make you feel better. Think about, think about what it feels like when you go into the coffee shop and you smell all that. Smell all that coffee, how you feel. I try to create that at home, and I try to create that on vacation. Was the two of us this last week. So your your wife, your kids, your dog and a coffee machine are all drowning at the same time. Which one never mind? Please don't make me to choose. I'm not gonna. Please don't make me choose just the smell of coffee will make you a nicer person. Obviously my kids, obviously my kids. I have to say, people think I'm insane right now, it's intelligence for your life. John Tesh, hanging with Gib, Gerard and Gib, according to a recent survey by two dating apps, one out of three married women say they were disappointed in how they were proposed to yes. Oh yes, you did a great job. If your wife is disappointed with the fireworks and the whole restaurant being rented out, you know, you you definitely won. But, I mean, first of all, I wasn't sure if Connie was going to say yes. I mean, because she's that person, right, you know. So I Yes, there was, there was a lot of stuff going on. I see a lot of proposal fails online. It's a very it's a common trend on on the internet, on like tick tock and Instagram would be a fail. So where they say, No, you know where, where the guy proposes. There was one very famous one recently where a guy proposed while she was running a marathon, and she said, No, not right. Now, this is my moment. But look, so here's your proposal needs to do. A proposal needs about being emasculated, well, but, yeah, but it was her moment, and it when she didn't want it to be about them. She wanted her, it to be about her. I totally get it. And my face, I'm struggling right now, right? So he wanted to make that about them, and she wanted it to be her moment, and I totally respect that. But here's the here's what makes proposals not work. But proposal doesn't work if you fail to understand the person you're proposing. You have to understand them. You have to go big in whatever it is that's most important to them. Do they love hiking in the outdoors? Then fine, you propose at the end of a nice, big hike. Do they love going to sporting events? That's the only context in which it's okay to propose a sporting event, by the way, only if she likes it. If you only you like it. It does not count to earn any kind of brownie points. There you go. All right, my friends, here we go. With three favors you should never ask of someone you've just started dating. Oh, this comes from relationship expert Alan gold shirt. He says, Alan says you need to wait until you're serious about each other to ask these things. Number one, could you pick me up at the airport? Oh, that's it, depending on the city. That can be a big deal. I mean, Los Angeles, it's an it's an immediate, no, it's a whole day. Yeah, that's you better be, you better be a fiance. You better be betrothed before you ask somebody to pick you up at the airport. Affianced, yeah, it's, you know, it means it's like, that's the verb form of fiance. You better be engaged before you do that. Okay, next, would you mind helping me move? Oh, there is a trend where women start to date guys just to get help moving, and then they ghost them, which, by the way, I respect the game. I respect you guys are brutal. That's like my friend, Lenny. You see what he would, he would, Lenny, are you there? He would, he would, he would date women like on a first date. And if they ordered surf and turf and they didn't finish the whole thing, you would go crazy. Yeah, oh, yeah. Never, never get a second date. And finally, hey, can you help me with my yard work? Things You Should Never ask if somebody you just started dating. I mean, it depends on the yard. If you're living in, like, if you're living in an apartment, if that just means, like, helping scrape out the window sill planter, but if you have, like, you know, 20 acres, then, yeah, that could be what's a no go. Well, if it's a, if it's a riding motor, gets a mower, get some popcorn. It's like you're at the movies. I love a riding mower. In fact, if anybody has a riding mower needs help with the yard work, I'm your guy. Men or women give us nothing to do with dating. I just like riding mowers. Here is a business that's on the ride. And you can do this as a side hustle, if you want. And Gib, it's as far from a tech job as you can get. It's mending and tailoring. Oh, so many, so many people buying secondhand clothing now and keeping clothes for a longer period of time. I just did this. I had a couple of vests let out so I could look like myself on the from the Avalon show in 1995 more people looking to have clothing repaired. Google is also seeing a spike in searches for the Japanese word sashiko, which is a mending technique where you can see the stitching. Yeah, a lot of Japanese mending techniques involve embracing where the things have been mended. So there's a, you know, the broken balls that you refill with gold. And then there's this, this mending technique about look, learning how to tailor for yourself. Will make, will make$40 clothes look like $400 clothes if you have, like, a $40 t shirt or $20 t shirt that you bought off the rack, and then you can tailor it just a little bit. Take it in, let it out. You are going to, you are going to look like you spent $400 on a t shirt. If you can do this for yourself, it is. You're gonna make the clothes that you bought cheap look like very expensive clothes. I highly recommend, if you don't know how to tailor, find a good tailor. It makes a huge difference broken bowls filled with gold. Yeah, there's this Japanese mending technique where if a bowl breaks, instead of trying to hide the seams, oh, you repair the bowl with gold for on all of the cracks, it makes the brokenness more beautiful. You know, how many pastors use that as a metaphor in their sermons? Yeah, it's a lot. I like it. We're gonna talk summer traditions, you know, Fourth of July cookout, Pool Party to kick off the season. We do a lot of traditional stuff with our family, with yes sir now with nine people, even just making traditional summertime foods like potato salad counts, according to the University of Connecticut, when we participate in annual traditions, we feel less stressed because those types of benchmarks and rituals give our brain structure regularity and predictability. Your kids love rituals. Love rituals. In fact, I read a recent study that said that one in five kids don't remember, you know, any of the other stuff that happens, aside from the trips and rituals that we go through as as a family when they're young? So you know, they're not going to remember the sporting events necessarily. They're not going to remember all of the school events you showed up to, but they will remember the rituals, and we talked about this before, even little rituals like sitting down and having dinner as a family every night improves, improves grades, improves overall health outcomes. For kids through their teenage years, they're more likely to stay off of drugs and gonna get better grades. If you have these little rituals throughout their lives, it's super important. These touchstones are important for everybody. And we just asked your kids where they wanted to go for grandma's recent birthday, big birthday, and they and they picked the same place we went four years ago, yeah? Which is because you because they love that ritual. The same thing with summer camp. Oh, yeah, exactly. Go back to the same place every year, and it becomes a part of who you are, yeah? Oh, nice. So here is a side hustle, Gib I'd never heard of before. It's being a standardized patient. What if you'd like to be an actor? This could be for you. It's a way to help train new doctors. It's essentially an acting job. You would be so great. You would always have beriberi or Ricketts or something. You earn about 20 bucks an hour to portray a patient with various medical conditions, conditions or symptoms. You need to be able to memorize the details of the case and accurately portray the symptoms, and you'll need to be comfortable with physical exams. Okay, wait, I would love to do this, but there was a whole episode of Seinfeld where Kramer and his buddy were doing this, and Kramer was so good, I think, at lupus, that they kept typecasting him as lupus. So he kept trying to get out of it and get a new part, because he didn't want to be typecast for one disease, or maybe he got cirrhosis the liver, I can't remember one thing, and he kept getting it over and over and over again. I would love to do this, not even as a job like I want to call my agent. Actually, I bet I'll Instagram, live it you guys can see it. So they give you the condition, right? You get, and you memorize all the all of the manifestations, right? And then the doctor or the makeup like, Why is your face? All y'all must be jaundice. I've got jaundice. Oh my gosh, we're gonna get you in this. I can't wait. That's it for the show today. Thank you guys so much for listening. If you like the show, please rate, comment and subscribe on Apple podcast, Spotify wherever you get your podcast. It makes a huge difference for us. If you guys can do that also, ultimately, we try to respond to every DM, every mention of the show. If you have a topic you want us to cover, we'll try to cover it, because ultimately, we do this show for you guys. So thank you so much for listening. You.