Quiet Confessions, Episode 21: Zoom Calls & Paw Patrol

In this week’s Quiet Confessions, Chelsea gets vulnerable about the mom guilt that comes with trying to balance parenting and personal growth. With both kids now in school, they share the challenges of juggling preschool pick-ups, three-hour Zoom trainings, and the ever-present temptation of screen time for their toddler.

From Paw Patrol marathons to the sweetness of a preschooler “working” on their lap, Chelsea opens up about the tension between logic and guilt, passion and parenting. This episode is for every parent who’s ever felt stretched thin, questioned if they were doing enough, and needed the reminder: you are not failing.

🔑 Key Takeaways

1. Logic doesn’t erase guilt. Even when kids are safe, cared for, and entertained, parents can still feel guilt about relying on screens.
   
   
2. Independent play has value. Letting kids entertain themselves builds resilience, creativity, and problem-solving.
   
   
3. Passion projects matter. Pursuing opportunities like trainings, studies, or work benefits both parent and family long-term.
   
   
4. Grace makes a difference. Being surrounded by other moms who understand the chaos of parenting helps ease guilt.
   
   
5. Balance is messy. Parenting and personal growth don’t line up perfectly — and that doesn’t mean failure.
   
   
6. Small glimmers count. Sweet moments, like a toddler pretending to work alongside you, can transform guilt into gratitude.

🎧 Soundbites

• “Guilt does not care about logic, does it?”
  
  
• “Independent play has value — but guilt says I should be doing more.”
  
  
• “I know I’m not choosing between my kids and something meaningless — this matters.”
  
  
• “Sometimes balance looks like Paw Patrol and a preschooler on my lap during Zoom calls.”
  
  
• “We’re not failing. We’re juggling. And that has to be enough.”

Transcript

Chelsea Myers (00:40)
Hey, welcome back to another Quiet Confessions. I'm Chelsea, and if you're new here, these are little mini episodes dedicated to my own journey. Just you, me, my snoring dogs, and my mic. ⁓ And today I want to talk about mom guilt. Not in the abstract way, like the mom's carry guilt.

but in the very specific lived in way that I'm feeling right now. Because our family's routine is changing, which happens and is going to happen over and over again. But right now, both my kids are in school, which is a big milestone. Avery, my youngest, started preschool and her day ends at one.

which means I pick her up, bring her home, and then things get a little complicated. The reality is, and the exciting thing is, I'm participating in a research study that I am so incredibly grateful to have the opportunity to be a part of. It's huge and I'm learning so much, but it comes with

three hour trainings twice a week on Zoom. So the timing is rough. One of those days happens to fall on an Avery preschool day. So I rushed to pick her up, get her home, get her shoes off, grab a snack, and then I have to sit down behind my computer screen for three hours.

I try to stretch her screen free time as long as I possibly can. I try to get her to play with her toys or read books. I'm so glad she loves to read books. Maybe color. Color wonder is amazing. Without it, I don't know what I'd do. Or even do puzzles, which I hate, but she seems to love. But she's three. So that holds her attention.

for maybe 30 minutes before she's done. Like completely done. And then I hand her her Kindle or I turn on a show or a movie because I don't have another option. And that's when guilt starts to sink in. Because of course, in my head, I hear the messages that all moms have heard.

All parents have heard. Limit screen time. Be present with your kids. These years are precious. Don't waste them. Ugh. And then there's me sitting behind my desktop while my three-year-old is glued to Paw Patrol, whether on the big screen or her little tablet. Even during the breaks, we get two 10-minute breaks in this three-hour training.

I can't really give her the attention that I want to. During the first break, I am unpacking her backpack, cleaning out her lunchbox, switching the laundry, and using the bathroom. By the time the second break rolls around, I'm packing her lunch for the next day, switching the laundry again, and grabbing fresh water and a snack for myself.

And through it all, I'm carrying this feeling like I'm choosing chores or tasks over her. Like I'm basically saying, go entertain yourself for three hours. And she's so little. Like that viral sound, like I'm just a baby. She's not a baby, but she's still little.

Here's the truth though. I know logically I'm not abandoning her. I know she's safe. I know that she's well cared for and fed and loved. She's literally behind me the entire time. We're both in the living room. I also know that independent play has value and that there's something good about kids learning to entertain themselves.

I even really like the saying, it's okay to be bored. Some of your greatest ideas can come out of being bored because you have to find a way to not be bored. But guilt does not care about logic, does it? Guilt says, she needs more time from you. You should be doing better. It's the little voice in the back of my head. It's hard because

I know I'm not choosing between her and something meaningless. This program that I'm doing matters. It's something I'm incredibly passionate about and it's giving me tools I will use long after these Zoom calls end. And they're going to benefit my family too. It's just balance. I don't quite have that figured out yet.

There are some glimmers though. Usually by the last half hour of class, Lily has gotten off the bus and clamored in and dropped all of her stuff. And my husband is soon to be home, but Avery will climb onto my lap so that we can quote unquote work together. She'll pretend that she's typing or that she's

trying to get on camera and has something to say. It's really, really cute and weirdly sweet. ⁓ And thankfully this program is with other moms. So there's a lot of understanding. Nobody cares if there's a toddler in the frame or even a meltdown going on. And that kind of grace goes a really long way. All of us yesterday

in the Zoom meeting were actually saying how much we appreciated each other being so understanding of just the chaos that is parenting. But even with all that, I still wrestle with that little voice in the back of my head telling me that I should be doing things differently and that I should have a better handle on this and that, I don't know, I should have things planned and set up.

so that she doesn't have to fend for herself? I don't know. I don't have an answer, but that's where I'm at right now. I'm grateful for an opportunity. I'm stretched really thin by the logistics, and I definitely have the weight of guilt on my shoulders. If you've ever been in a season like this where your reality doesn't necessarily line up with your ideals,

I hope you hear me when I say, and I'm saying this to myself too, you are not failing. We're not failing. We're humans. We're juggling. We're doing the best that we can with the time and the energy that we have. And that has to be enough.

All right, I'm gonna go put the kettle on for tea, check the washing machine, and then it will probably be time for me to go pick up Avery from preschool. But I'll be back next week and I can't wait to chat some more.