Quiet Connection - Perinatal Mental Health

Healing from Pregnancy Loss & The Power of Surrender: Kanika’s Story

Chelsea Myers Season 7 Episode 10

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0:00 | 59:33

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What happens when a high-achieving, structured project manager is completely stripped of control by motherhood? In this deeply moving episode of Quiet Connection, host Chelsea Myers sits down with Kanika, an engineering professional and MBA graduate turned Energy Coach. Kanika opens up about her intense transition into parenthood, navigating the early judgments of breastfeeding, and her son’s sudden medical and speech hurdles.

But the true catalyst for Kanika’s profound spiritual awakening came through the devastating loss of her daughter to stillbirth at 31 weeks. Kanika shares how this heartbreaking grief forced her to completely surrender her need for fixing, leading to an extraordinary, ongoing relationship with her daughter’s spirit. 

From manifesting the perfect quiet Montessori school for her son to landing a dream corporate role without even applying , Kanika explains how cleaning your energy and choosing radical presence can completely transform your life and business. This conversation is a beautiful, grounding reminder that nothing is permanent, and that sometimes, the hardest moments in life are calling us back to who we were always meant to be.

Key Takeaways

  • Dropping the Perfectionism Mask: True presence in parenting and business requires letting go of how things should be done and stepping away from the trap of constant control.
  • Trusting Maternal Intuition Over Society: When navigating a child’s developmental milestones or medical challenges, a parent’s intuitive knowing is often the most accurate guide.
  • The Power of Radical Surrender: Deep grief and unexpected life disruptions can serve as soul-level wake-up calls, breaking down our egos and opening us up to a broader universe.
  • Energy Magnetism in Business: Running a heart-led conscious business is entirely about self-worth. When you clear your personal energy, your target audience naturally leans in.
  • Believing Before Seeing: Whether waiting for milk to come in, fighting for your child's educational future, or surviving a mental health dark space, you must hold onto the belief of a better reality before it physically manifests. 

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 Special Thanks to Steve Audy for the use of our theme song: Quiet Connection

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Chelsea Myers (00:02.372)
Today we are here with Kanika Kanika, how are you?

Kanika | Energy Coach (00:07.086)
doing really well, Chelsea. Thank you for having me on the show.

Chelsea Myers (00:10.684)
Of course, I'm so glad that we're connecting. And I'm excited to get to know more about you today. So to kind of just roll right into it, get right to the nitty gritty, I'd love to know who is Kanika today and who were you before you started your parenting journey?

Kanika | Energy Coach (00:35.054)
That is such a lovely question.

Kanika | Energy Coach (00:39.892)
The Kanika that I... Let's talk about the Kanika today. I think she's a lot more present. I would love to say that I've got it all under control and I'm like the perfect mom and the perfect business person. But that's not true. I would say that I'm a present mom.

And I try and be there with my kid and I try and be there in my business. And I balance that. And a lot of times things go well. A lot of times things just happen the way they happen. And I don't hold guilt for that.

Chelsea Myers (01:25.85)
I love that. I think that's something we should all strive for as parents is letting go of that guilt, right? You show up as you can.

Kanika | Energy Coach (01:34.322)
Yes, I used to carry massive guilt, like other parents, they're bringing baked cookies or, you know, beautiful stuff in the school. And I admire them. I love them. And I've just come to accept and go like, OK, this is me. I just buy stuff from the shops and get it there. I am actually very proud when I can do that, because sometimes there are times I do a mistake and it's OK.

Chelsea Myers (01:42.399)
You

Chelsea Myers (01:54.104)
Yeah.

Kanika | Energy Coach (02:04.193)
There's so many things I get right and then there things that I don't get right. But it's all a learning moment for me and my son.

Chelsea Myers (02:12.761)
Yeah, absolutely. So who do you think you were prior to having kids?

Kanika | Energy Coach (02:20.425)
so focused, so ambitious. I am an MBA and an engineering professional. Grew up in a very structured environment, but also had just very high expectations of myself. I guess I still do, but I'm just learning to let go more and more and just get easier with it. And what I've found is that the more I let go of emotions or the perfection really,

It's not that the work falls down. It's actually more beneficial and relieving for everybody. But before this, I had just a lot of pressure around how things should be done. And what it was really doing was it was actually making life harder. It's counterintuitive, but it was because there was so much in my way, things had to be done my way. I really wasn't open to ideas even when I felt I was.

There wasn't place for as much insights to come in and there wasn't as much openness because I felt that I knew the better way of doing it.

Chelsea Myers (03:32.767)
right like your it was like no i got this i my way is the right way

Kanika | Energy Coach (03:38.633)
Yeah, yeah, like kind of think of a child who's two years old and just adamant that I know how to tie my shoelaces. And you can do that. You can do that for a really long time. But you know, buddy, you need help. I was that person.

Chelsea Myers (03:52.708)
Yeah, it reminds me of something I read recently that said like, I'm going to go ahead and call school and let them know we'll be late tomorrow because my toddler is going to tie their own shoes. Right? Like, you're so convinced that you can do it, that you're not going to ask for help.

Kanika | Energy Coach (04:12.973)
Yeah, that is very much me. And also, think it wasn't in my head. I wasn't being that a perfectionist and I wasn't closing my point of view. But just like the toddlers thinking like they've really got it. That's where I was. And I thought that I understood that this is what the other person's going to say. So I know.

Chelsea Myers (04:14.715)
you

Kanika | Energy Coach (04:39.713)
And I can preempt that answer. And I think parenting is so beautiful because as messy as it is, it just really brings you back to what really matters in life. And you see those little moments, you see those emotional moments, and you understand that what are you doing trying to chase and run around in life? And they bring you back to the realness to why you were here in the first place.

I realized that the more I am present with my son or the more I can enjoy the small moments, actually things happen. It shifted me in my relationships apart from just the parenting relationship as well, because I've started seeing humans more behind the role and the work that's to be done. And that's helped with better relationships.

Maybe the Kanika before was very much like this relationship or this interaction, what are we getting out of it? Not always, but a lot of times it was like that. Whereas now it's a more human interaction. Like, how are you? How are you doing? You know, like just really wanting to know.

How are you? And often that's what I do with my clients as well. Like sometimes they'll come in and they'll, I'll ask them, how are you? And they'll give me a rundown of the day. They'll basically running through a checklist with the stuff I'm like, no, how are you? How are you holding amidst all of that? And I think that's the space when I allow for that connection to happen. It brings a lot of clarity connection to me, but also allows other people to live with that clarity and connection.

Chelsea Myers (06:31.717)
Yeah, that is beautiful. I love too that you recognize that it was the slowing down and like, right, and being present and that parenthood kind of forces you into that whether you're ready for it or not. Yeah, that's, that is a, that was a lovely like.

I don't even know the right word, a lovely little like summary of, of who you were before and who you are becoming and and are today. In that same vein, it's like you said before, you were very driven, you were very sort of set in you're like, I know what I want. And I know how I want to get there. Did you always envision yourself being a mother? Always.

Kanika | Energy Coach (07:21.535)
always. I always loved kids. I think I was the person who was always playing with younger kids from the earliest memories that I have. I just loved kids. I loved kids. I loved their naughtiness. And when our son was going to be born, I used to say that, you know, I want a really cheeky kid. Somebody who's really happy, somebody who I asked for it actually.

Chelsea Myers (07:45.9)
Hahaha

Kanika | Energy Coach (07:51.436)
I said that, I want somebody who's so full of life and life's just so much fun with him. But I didn't ask for like the most compliant kid. My values are that I love freedom. What that means is that if somebody is telling me don't do this, and I realize that.

I just cannot take that boundary. It does not matter who is saying that. If I want to cross a line, like I will cross the line. And for me, that's been very important, even with my kids as well. My son's And so that's been very important as a value. As a parent, it poses a very interesting challenge though, because when you want to raise your child, bringing them up with freedom.

as toddlers getting them out of a playground or you know the everyday negotiations I got myself hard bargains there.

Chelsea Myers (08:46.116)
Ha ha ha!

Chelsea Myers (08:51.841)
Yeah, I can imagine.

Kanika | Energy Coach (08:55.949)
And I've really had to learn to honor my own boundaries in the process and explain that. I think there's so much you could learn from just being a parent and doing that better. Like they really teach you life skills the way nothing else can.

Chelsea Myers (09:19.151)
Yeah, for sure. I am-

I have a three year old right now. I have a three year old and a 10 year old. So we are very much in those testing boundaries phases in two very different and yet very similar ways. So I can definitely, that resonates with me in learning to be like, yes, I want you to be assertive. I want you to be free to be who you are, but I also need you to put your shoes on because we need to leave right now.

Kanika | Energy Coach (09:51.442)
Yes, absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. And I learned that that was also a matter of my own boundaries and my own worth. Right. Like there was for me a period of time where I wouldn't say I was loosey goose, but I pretty much was really wanting to allow my child a lot of freedom and

Chelsea Myers (09:51.997)
Yeah

Kanika | Energy Coach (10:21.405)
It was meaning that I had a lot of emotional pressure on me. And so I had to explain and that they're kids, you know, you're expecting them to do very adult things and understand human emotions and what they're going through and self-control themselves. It's a little bit unfair to expect as well. And then I had to come up with other rules that, if this happens, like if you're not going into shower by a certain amount of time, I've told you so many times.

For me, I have never done things such as time out. I don't like that. But I've put rules in place, like if this doesn't happen, he loves his TV time. And so your TV time reduces and say whatever. But for me, that's the carrot and the stick. And that's the stick I've chosen. Sometimes it's the carrot and you oscillate between them. You see what works. But I think

Chelsea Myers (10:57.349)
Mm.

Kanika | Energy Coach (11:20.735)
It's more also understanding that no, this is my boundary. Like really, this does not work. And also then teaching them that, hey, this is not how you actually treat another woman, another human. And they need to have this, like as much as we're giving you your freedom, it does not mean walking over the other person.

Chelsea Myers (11:41.914)
Yeah, for sure. And it reminds me a lot of just natural consequences, right? Like if you're not doing what you're supposed, like what we need to do in this timeframe, then you're not, you're naturally not going to have time to do the fun things that you want to do afterwards. Cause there's not as much as we wish there were more than 24 hours in a day. There just are not. So yeah, but for sure that totally, that totally resonates. If you're not going to take a shower, there's not going to be time for TV.

But yeah, let's sort of let's backtrack a little bit and let's talk about your journey into parenting and what that looked like for you. You always envisioned yourself being a mom and you had your son first was your first pregnancy, correct? What was that experience like for you? Was it what you envisioned? Was it different than what you expected?

Kanika | Energy Coach (12:39.767)
So totally different. So my first son was born after a long time. We had to try for a year. I had to undergo laparoscopy, which if I see around, it wasn't the hardest of parenting journeys at all. But I do remember even with just that thinking, gosh, this is what I want to do. I feeling.

not complete because I wasn't able to have a baby then. And then we conceived him. weren't as many troubles with the pregnancy as such, but after he was born and he was the first one. And before that, so I'm an engineer by background and MBA professional and on top of it,

I don't know. think I've done like 17, 18 years in project management. So I work taking big companies through like their crises and I tell them, you know, this is the plan. This is what we do. Right. And then the baby comes out and the emotions are high. And I remember the second day. he was an induced, like I'd gone into my gynecologist. She'd induced me a week earlier. And so my milk didn't come out in time.

the baby was born, my body was still getting ready and I'm emotional and both of us don't know but he's crying, I'm crying because my milk's not coming out and it was just crazy. And then when it did come out, then it was the whole struggle with breastfeeding and there were just so many moments where I was like, I don't know this thing, like I'm not meant to be a mom, you know. I was judging myself.

Chelsea Myers (14:33.622)
Mmm.

Kanika | Energy Coach (14:35.691)
with those little moments and I thank a friend of mine and she said, it's a phase, it will pass. You will know as a mom that this is you, you've got it. It took time, but slowly I understood that I got it. And they've actually been so many times after that and more confidence now, especially as I become more present that no, this is what's happening with my son and this is what we need to do and so on.

like I remember, my son was about three. He was babbling and I was concerned about his speech and I went and I took him to the speech therapist and later on we found out that actually his ears were blocked at the time. He needed to get cromits to hear, but at the time it was like, what are you doing? You know, you are just like crazy. It's okay. He's a little kid. He'll pick up. Sometimes kids take time.

and I trusted that intuition, but over time I've learned to let that intuition really guide me. And it's guided me through other times as well, where in interactions with schools or with interactions with therapists, I think other parents will say probably similar things as well, but it's good to tune in as a mom and tune in and say, no,

this is what's right for my child, not always letting the whole world tell you what's okay, but really going like, no, this is what the child needs. This is what's happening. And I know for a fact that that drives the results. Like when I see that and when I work with that, I see the change with that intuition and with that drive that it almost helps the kid beautifully.

Chelsea Myers (16:31.097)
Yeah. And it demonstrates a shift too, like you said, in your thinking, especially going from someone who's the problem solver, who goes into these crazy situations and it's like, no, no, no, no, we've got this. This is what we're going to do. This is the plan. And then to enter motherhood. I think any of us, so many people can relate to this and be like,

What is the plan again? Like what exactly is happening? This is not what I thought it was going to be. And so that evolution of instead like leaning into intuition, leaning into being present, leaning into taking cues from your child, right? And like, yeah.

Kanika | Energy Coach (17:00.055)
Yeah.

Kanika | Energy Coach (17:13.975)
Yes. Yeah. Like I remember a time, so my son was three when he had his grommet surgery. And I have a feeling that probably he didn't hear as well from maybe the age of somewhere two and a half or two, because his speech took time to come back. But also what happened with him, because he had not heard really well, it's almost like hearing underwater. So when he got the grommets and suddenly he was hearing

Chelsea Myers (17:39.995)
Mm-hmm.

Kanika | Energy Coach (17:43.224)
For him, the pitch was much higher. So we sent him to a normal daycare at the time in Australia. And we noticed that he was just sitting by himself and not really engaging with other kids. We'd also changed the city then. And they were saying, well, you know, he's not just as friendly a kid and he wants to be on his own. And I'm like, no, that's not my kid. That's not how I know him.

and I said, no, this would be it, that it just gets noisy for him and he does not know yet what to do. Like it's foreign to him. And so he just separates to balance himself out. And I remember that time having the conversation with my husband as well, that, you know, he can't be in this daycare. We've got to find a place for him that is quiet. And so my family is going, well, where in the world would you get a daycare that is quiet? I'm like, I just need one spot for one child.

Wherever it is, I will find it, but he is not going here.

Chelsea Myers (18:40.603)
Yeah, did you find a place for him to go?

Kanika | Energy Coach (18:44.993)
Yes, I found a beautiful Montessori school. He flourished, beautiful Montessori preschool and he flourished there. It was quiet, it was nice, it was exactly what he needed. And it was also much closer to school. And this is all where you think, daycare, you know, they have a wait list and how is he going to get it and so on. But I think my resolution and intention was just so strong and I was conversing with the universe so much like this is what I want. you know.

Instead of you thinking that, I won't get a spot. I was like, one spot, one child. That's all I'm seeking in the whole, in all of these places. That's all that I need. Surely there would be one place somewhere. And I did, I manifested. We got the exact dates that we needed. It was even closer to our house and the previous daycare that where we were trying to send him. And my son had a fabulous year there. And I think

Chelsea Myers (19:25.933)
Yeah, you were manifesting it.

Kanika | Energy Coach (19:42.072)
probably that strengthened a lot more that what I believe for my child, not from the place of, I know better for my kid. It wasn't any more that it was more, okay, what is my child needing? How can I best support him? And then I was like, it's just going to turn up and I'm not compromising on what he needs because of what society tells me that this may or may not be available.

Whatever he needs will show up or wherever it is, I will find that. That's what he will get.

Chelsea Myers (20:18.115)
Yeah, it's it really is this this perfect balance, I think I won't say perfect because I don't love the term perfect. But it is this really nice balance between this version of you that is like, nope, it's gonna happen because I'm the fixer and I'm gonna fix it. And also, I can, I'm gonna advocate for my child, I'm gonna

trust that the universe is listening to me in what I am asking it for. And I'm gonna trust that my son is gonna get, like I'm gonna get him the help that he needs, right? It's like this balance between the drive and the, like we said, the manifesting, right?

Kanika | Energy Coach (20:59.821)
Yes. I think maybe we should add in here as well that when my son was two, because, you when we look at it, it seemed as if I got it. Like suddenly my son was born and I, you know, flicked a switch and things just happened. It wasn't that. When my son was two, that's when I conceived my daughter. And I also lost her when she was 31 weeks old.

So I had to give birth to a stillborn baby. And that was, is the hardest thing that I've ever done in my life.

Kanika | Energy Coach (21:41.294)
It shocked me. I was in guilt. I was overwhelmed. I had to really think my life all over again, understand what it was about. It shook me from the inside out. Honestly, that time I did not want to continue living on. But my son was two years old and

I was looking after him and I could not have checked out on him. It's also a very interesting age when they're two because they're exploring little human beings who have their own mind and they can be pretty dangerous. So you've got to really look out for them that they're not hurting themselves and they're not banging their head somewhere or so on. So you've really got to be present at the time that I just wanted to, you know,

Chelsea Myers (22:18.586)
Yeah.

Kanika | Energy Coach (22:35.233)
bury myself and just cry out, I had to watch over my son who was so full of life then. So as much as I was in the grieving stage or the shock stage, I was looking at him and I was thinking, well, what happened between when I would have been like that to now? How did I lose the joy and the connection and the desire for life? What happened?

Because he and a lot of babies are very happy with crinkled paper and little things. They don't need much to get happy. So what transpires in between? And so in that desire to get happiness back for him, to find my connection back with life for him, for myself, and also just to reconnect with my daughter, because I wanted to.

get in touch with her. I wanted to find out that she was okay. And some people might be thinking and feeling, hey, it's crazy. Like she's passed over, but that's just a mom talking. I wanted to know that my baby was okay. I wanted to have a chat with her. I wanted to say, I love you. Just have a conversation like a mom. And that is the time when I really started talking to the universe as a mom.

not pleading, not angry, but just surrendering and going, okay, you've given me this, I've lost my daughter and I really don't know how to carry on with life, but can you help me now? Because I need to connect with her and I know I need to live on, but I just don't know how. So I think all the ego perhaps that I had or the fixing mentality, that's

when I could let go of a lot of it, because I knew life was not in my control at all.

Kanika | Energy Coach (24:40.577)
The good thing with that is that I did connect with my daughter and I learned that she came into my life as an agreement. We had an agreement before I incarnated on earth. My agreement with her was that if I was wasting my life, she would come and she would wake me up. And she had tried in so many other ways. I wasn't listening. I was just so high headed.

that this is my way, I know it. And she was trying, you when I was feeling disconnected earlier, she was trying, but I just wasn't in the place to hear it. And so she did what she could and she just completely shook me up and woke me up. talking to her and connecting with her has been life changing. It's shifted my perception of life and that's also allowed me then.

to connect more with my son. I think my two kids, my daughter teaches me about life beyond life, and my son teaches me about life in life.

Chelsea Myers (25:54.652)
And I thank you so much for bringing context to that. I did know from the little that I know about you that you had a daughter and that you had lost her, but that brings so much more context and also depth into understanding where the shift happened for you and where...

reconnecting with your son and like you said, those little moments of presence. It's always so difficult for me to...

like not necessarily navigate the topic of loss, but I always with every parent that I speak with who has experienced a loss, I find it very important to make it clear that I have never experienced a loss. So I can never say like that I understand or that must have been so horrible. So I don't ever say those things, but what I do say is I see you and I so appreciate you inviting

me in to to know you and your daughter as well as your son because they're both your children and that experience hearing that it really that is what shifted your perspective on how you communicate with the universe how you show up for your son I am

honored. I am honored to be able to hold a piece of that journey with you and hold space for that right now. And I also acknowledge that it's not easy to talk about. It's still so stigmatized, I believe, to talk about loss in that way. So I appreciate you bringing us into that part of your journey. Can we maybe maybe explore just a little bit deeper? Like you said, like in that

Chelsea Myers (27:57.624)
In that moment when you lost your daughter, you felt this total disconnect, like you couldn't move on. In what ways did you look to connect with her and how were you able to receive those messages from her? How were you able to connect with her?

Kanika | Energy Coach (28:16.587)
Yeah, great question. I didn't really have a plan. First time I realized that all... Okay, so this is the project manager talking, right? And really till the time she was born, I had, I knew I I thought that I was gonna have two very young kids. So had the clothes washed, everything laid out. Like I had done the plan. I had a business running and I had like made sure that things would be okay and...

Chelsea Myers (28:26.628)
Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (28:41.466)
Mm-hmm.

Kanika | Energy Coach (28:46.431)
I had like the staff prepared. In my head, I had planned it out. I'd done really good planning, but I hadn't planned for life.

Kanika | Energy Coach (29:00.621)
And when I lost her, that wasn't even a foreseeable scenario. It was... I honestly did not know how I would be able to live on. And I remember seeing my husband then and just telling him that I can't get through this.

very strongly believing that it is very hard then.

Kanika | Energy Coach (29:31.447)
So I'll move us forward from that time to delivering her, but then coming home and coming home is surreal because you were waiting for a baby. I was waiting for a baby and you know, now I have the dolls. I have the bassinet. I have the playroom. I have the reminders. I don't have her.

And

In a way, you can sort of move on from life as if nothing's happened.

But it was just hard to move on. I couldn't do that. Those times are, hard. Those times, it was also as if, if I just smiled and if I just laughed, you know, does that mean that I am disconnecting from her? So there's just, it's, it's just surreal and it's just so unreal on multiple levels. You can't really say what's going on.

I would notice people would come and people would try and help, but people wouldn't know what to say. And all I would say is the best thing that I had then was some people would just come and they would say, well, if you want to chat, you know, I'm here, or I'm going for a walk. Would you want to come along? You know, just simple things like that. They just have us be present. Sometimes people think that we don't want to talk about our babies, but actually it's nothing. Also people can behave in different ways.

Kanika | Energy Coach (31:09.505)
People can process grief in different ways. It depends. For me, the work that I do now, that is just an extension of what my daughter teaches me. Like I'm more and more connected. The more I tune into everything, into intuition, into helping my clients now, I help more people just build conscious businesses profitably. And for me, that's an extension because more people who can lead lives.

very connected, very present and bring those businesses into life, inspire others. Like that for me is the purpose. And nothing is more rewarding than that. But at that point in time, I didn't quite know what to do. And that's where the surrender came in. And just that chat with the universe came in that you have got to help me. And I was really talking mom to mom.

You know how as a mom, just, mean, hopefully it never comes true, but just imagine that you have a tiger in front of you and the tiger you feed is going to attack your child. What are you going to do? You're not going to think about the tiger and whether you're able to fight the tiger or not, but I know that I am going to give it my best shot. Right. It was just that.

Chelsea Myers (32:18.971)
Mm.

Chelsea Myers (32:27.599)
Yeah.

Kanika | Energy Coach (32:32.309)
When I was with the universe, I was just saying, we're having a chat and you need to hear me out. I'm the mom who's not been able to connect with her daughter and you need to help me out. But this was not desperate. This was not a pleading. It was very much at an equal level and it was very much almost demanding with certainty. Like you've got to do this, you know, just with the certainty that I would run after the tiger.

even without knowing what is possible. But I know that I would fight my last breath, right? Just the same way I was approaching the universe and just going, hey, you know, you've got to help me out here. Like, I need to talk to my daughter with a claim, with a right. Like, I need to talk to my daughter. And I think it was just that certainty and that drive, that intention that got things working.

Chelsea Myers (33:01.935)
Mm-hmm.

Chelsea Myers (33:18.83)
Yeah!

Kanika | Energy Coach (33:31.021)
I was first of all, I was just looking for some other intuitives and psychics who would help me out and they did. But it never felt like I connected with my daughter myself.

So I found a teacher and amazing teacher. He taught me clairvoyance. So I actually stayed on with him and learned all his tools. But the second session was when he taught me how to connect with my daughter. That was my own session. He taught me how to do it. And I just sat down and it's just a way of meditating, but just inviting her spirit in and seeing that spirit and honoring and talking the question. So it's very much like a Zoom chat.

except it's not Zoom, it's with the visions and I'm sitting in a nice grounded place and holding that conversation and asking the questions. This is what I teach some of my clients as well around the spiritual awakening. How do you really get in touch with yourself and get answers to your questions? But that's how it happened. It surprisingly isn't as complicated. You know, I can tell you my process.

But even for others, whatever desire you have, if you really truly set the intention that, hey, I need clarity on this, whether you're seeking universe, source, God, whatever your terminology is, but get very clear on that and find out the spaces where you find that moment, place of rest, and you will start getting those answers. I mean, I can't be teaching it here, otherwise I would do it on a podcast.

Chelsea Myers (35:10.777)
Right? Yeah.

Kanika | Energy Coach (35:13.677)
But when you find that nice place of connection and quiet, that consciousness is available to us. What I'm able to do is something what everybody is able to do. was never, I never thought I was a clairvoyant. And yet now I tune into people's Akashic records and I give them readings and tell them about their past lives and ancestors and all sorts of stuff. I had no idea, but I can do it and you can do it as well.

It is also a learnable skill.

Chelsea Myers (35:46.556)
I have always felt that so listeners of the show will know that I definitely try as hard as I can not to infuse my own opinions or beliefs. But you will also know if you're a listener of the show that I am very much a believer in like energy and source and universe and the ability to communicate. And I do that resonates with me. I think we all have the ability. think.

some of us are just a little bit more awake to it than others are. So what you're describing makes sense to me. And I also love that you note that it doesn't just have to do with like

connecting with ancestors, you can literally sit down and set an intention of like, okay, like you said, like when you work with clients about manifesting business ideas and stuff, it's like, just ask, just get to the point where you are communicating with whoever it is or whatever it is that you are resonating with and just ask the question. And that's what you did when you wanted to connect with your daughter. Like, I just need to talk to my daughter.

Kanika | Energy Coach (37:00.545)
Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (37:00.611)
And that kind of that was, am I right? And that was kind of the catalyst into right, the whole shift where everything shifted. And you've said yourself, your daughter, you and your daughter had an agreement that she was going to come into your life when you needed this shift. And she and she did. Yeah. Yeah, talk to me a little bit more about that, about how things shifted once you

Kanika | Energy Coach (37:05.506)
Totally.

Kanika | Energy Coach (37:22.902)
Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (37:29.079)
once you were able to make that connection.

Kanika | Energy Coach (37:32.268)
lot shifted. So first of all, just talking to her lifted so much off me because I was carrying the guilt. And so it was that, that, okay, I wasn't guilty. I didn't lose her, like whatever it might've felt in physical life, because I carried a lot of guilt. I lost her in my sleep and I felt so ashamed.

that how come a mom is sleeping while, yeah.

But also connecting with her has just been so enlightening because to me it proved that there is life beyond what we see, that there's a bigger purpose. Now I feel that we all are just like tiny human beings, know, like an ant and an elephant, like the ants are really, really tiny. And I feel this is how humans are. We think that we are the doers, we do this and so on. And yet in this big, vast universe,

And even elephant is probably smaller compared to the size of the universe. And we think that we rule the world and we do the things. No, like I've been such a project manager. Could I manage my life? No. But think of how birth happens. Think of how life happens. Think of how seasons happen or just general form changes on earth. And you would realize that

Chelsea Myers (38:53.467)
Hahaha

Kanika | Energy Coach (39:09.111)
there is very little that we have control of. We like thinking we have control, but there is no predictability. There's actually a lot more consciousness around us. When you tune into it, then life changes a lot easily. So the good thing was that as I connected to her and I continued learning all the spiritual tools as well, I started applying them to my job. So that time, for example, one of the times is when my son was four. So when I had lost her, my son was about two and a half and then around

was when I wanted to go back to workforce again. And I also wanted a job then that would be just really flexible. I would be able to pick my son, drop my son, be with him when he is sick, you the dream job. And I would have a job where my boss would really love me, the team would really be nice, and the package would be great. All those amazing things. And I just did the spiritual tools and I actually got a job like that.

without even me applying for the job. Like I had a friend, I just reached out to him. It was miracles of miracles. And I thought he was in another city. I was just saying hi after a long time. And he's like, you know, I fly out and I work in this company sometimes. And this company, it was actually based in the city where I was. So that was the first miracle because I had not reached out to him for a job.

And then he said, but you know, they're also looking for people and he and I knew each other from a background, but we didn't quite exactly hundred percent know like the work that we did. So he said, you know, do you want to shoot me or CV and I'll see if I can pass it along. But what are the odds that my CV is the exact match for the position that they're looking for? So that's how my CV goes. That's how my CV was done. Then I had the interview and then everything went well and I have the best.

Chelsea Myers (40:59.227)
Wow

Kanika | Energy Coach (41:07.041)
boss and the best team ever. Really good, like in terms of everything that I'd wanted, everything checked out. So that was like the realization, you know, that, things are happening and maybe they can happen at bigger scales as well. I kept doing the tools and things kept working for me. Like I manifested bigger jobs, better jobs in the same company. I got promoted. I got called and promoted, offered other things. So.

And this is a new industry, like I'd never been in mining before. So it was a completely new industry for me where things were happening. So it was like, this is really cool. And as I kept doing this, I started getting the visions that I should start sharing my work and I should take people on a healing journey or take people on an empowerment journey. And I resisted it for a really long time.

Chelsea Myers (42:03.236)
Yeah.

Kanika | Energy Coach (42:03.989)
I thought maybe it was one of those phases, it will fade away. So I even played with just doing weekend classes and they worked out well. And I was like, okay, I'm doing that thing. This is not what I'm really supposed to go into, but I just got the messages loud and clear. And then that's how I stepped into it. But boy, it's been a journey. And since I've done that, I also...

So here's the fun thing about a conscious business growth as well that I learned. So I have a corporate experience of decades, 16, 18 years.

Kanika | Energy Coach (42:46.753)
But running a corporate business is very different to running a conscious business or a heart led business. Very different. Different things because in another business, let's say, whatever product or service you have, is sort of outside you. You're getting more attention. You're thinking about marketing, promoting that product. When you are the heart led business owner, you're actually promoting yourself.

It means you're really talking about your own self-worth, that I am worthy of this. So it really takes a big shift, internal shift in terms of, well, this is what I can do for you. It is you speaking your truth and then claiming that truth and telling other people that, hey, this is what I can do for you. Feeling powerful about that before those results come in. Like, yes, now I have a good

you know, history with clients and I can bring other testimonials. But the first time when you come out and say it, you're like, gosh, can I do that? Like same people. Is this me? But it's like when you're bringing up the child, right? Like, I don't know how to breastfeed, but did we manage it? I think so. Yeah. It's those things. You have to believe it before you see it. And I think my life is preparing me for that.

Chelsea Myers (44:01.179)
Mm-hmm.

Kanika | Energy Coach (44:12.887)
that you believe it before you see it and then the scene happens, it comes to reality. So the takeaway that I would give to everybody, you we were talking about clarity and intention. This is the biggest thing I see with business owners or people in general, whatever you want, get crystal clear about it. And I don't just mean a vision board. I don't just mean putting the pictures out there and saying, this is what I want.

That's a wish. Like make it, this is where I'm getting to. That clarity, when you can get that, you will move mountains. Like I'm becoming that person.

Chelsea Myers (44:51.235)
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think that I think that that also so two things to two things that I want to know. I think that that message in particular. Yes, it works for like you said, like a heart a heart led

corporation and business and business intentions, but it also speaks to parenthood in general as well. And especially when you're becoming a brand new parent and like you were saying with your son, like, don't know what I'm doing. Knowing it doesn't mean that things are going to be perfect. And it doesn't mean that it's going to look exactly like what you said, like you make the vision board and it's a wish. if

if you it's the believing before seeing like you said so if you can hold on to that belief especially we'll bring it back to i'm bringing it back to like your son again like the uncertainty and the is this going to work out my milk isn't coming in okay i believe this is going to work out i just have to hold on and it is going to work out

Kanika | Energy Coach (45:58.434)
Yeah. Yeah. And holding that, you know, even when it does not seem possible. Like I remember a conversation where somebody's supposedly an expert and they're talking to me about my child and saying, well, he's sort of never going to catch up with his studies and things like he's going to be behind because of whatever they felt medically.

And I looked at the person in the face and I said, no, that's never going to happen. And she said, why? I said, well, I know because I'm his mother. It makes no sense. But I was dead serious. Like, I know because I'm his mother and this is just not going to happen. And it wasn't ego about me being the mother. It was just that that is not a reality that I accept for my child. That is not going to happen. Like you can say that fine, but

Chelsea Myers (46:36.463)
Ha ha ha!

Kanika | Energy Coach (46:55.553)
We're going to work so that this is not his reality. And holding onto that belief, like really strongly saying, this is it. Like I'm not accepting anything else.

Chelsea Myers (47:07.951)
Yeah. Well, and...

And speaking to like, I think a lot of parents who hear those words, like, your child's never going to do this or your child's always going to be behind on that. I think there's this part of us as mothers that say like, well, then we're just, we're going to do whatever we're going to get to his capabilities. We are going to fulfill, right? Like whatever he is capable of, we're going to get there and we're going to, we're going to celebrate it. And he's going to thrive because he's my kid and I'm going to fight for him.

And then even beyond that too, with the believing before seeing, which is such a powerful thing that stuck out to me that you said, when you were in the depths of this really, really dark place after losing your daughter and you genuinely believed you could not go on, there came a point where you did have to believe before you saw. And it wasn't a quick,

It wasn't a everything's rainbows and sunshine and I love life now and there's a silver lining to everything. But it was, there is another side. And I think for parents who are experiencing any sort of challenge, like perinatal mental health disorders or child loss or birth trauma or just really challenging parenting, because parenting is not easy.

Knowing that the present moment that you're in right now, I can tell you, I believed fully I would never, I would never be happy again, right? I would never feel normal again. And I had someone say to me, you don't have hope right now, so I'm going to hold onto it for you until it comes back to you. But it's that same mentality, right? Like, we're going to believe it for you until you can see it.

Kanika | Energy Coach (48:55.927)
So beautiful.

Kanika | Energy Coach (49:04.909)
Mm-hmm.

Chelsea Myers (49:05.155)
And I think that's a really important message for parents and people in general to hear that this present thing that you're nothing is permanent, right? Joy is not permanent. Grief is grief. Maybe grief has varying degrees, but like the, the moment that you're in right now is not the rest of your life. And it sounds like it sounds like the moment that are not the moment, but the process in which

Kanika | Energy Coach (49:27.309)
Mm-hmm. Yes.

Chelsea Myers (49:34.508)
you decided like, yeah, I'm going to lean into this and I believe this and then I'll see. And so will you. That totally shifted. Like when we talk about the Kanika before and the Kanika now, it's more of a like, trusting the process kind of thing. Does that resonate? Yeah. So I'm going to shift us a little bit.

Kanika | Energy Coach (49:57.326)
Yes, totally. Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (50:03.297)
just because I want to talk about present day and you have you've done that beautifully a little bit but all of these experiences that you went through which are some of them are vastly relatable like I could definitely relate to the to the toddler years right and I can relate to the strong willed and the wanting to raise children who have their own voice and stuff and some of them will resonate with with a smaller group of people which isn't that small but like parents who have experienced loss

But, and of course my brain just totally froze. So just kidding, this happens to me all the time. I'll be mid sentence and then whatever I was about to say disappears. so different pieces of your story resonate for different reasons, but let's talk about how that journey led you to what you're doing today. What you're doing today is you're doing right this whole.

different type of coaching business coaching and and talk to me about how that evolved.

Kanika | Energy Coach (51:07.999)
Yeah, so as I started getting into coaching, like that was, it just became stronger and stronger. And there were just so many coincidences that, you know, that was what I had to do. and initially I started, and I still do work with parents sometimes. I have clients who come up for that, but I also found that I'll start working with them. But because they're getting the tools, then they're getting

they're finding the peace, they're finding the clarity, and they're then really tapping into that deeper purpose. And then the clients were like, well, now I've got this purpose and I want to share this with the world and what do I do? And I went, okay, all right, now let's get you onto your business. And it was pretty much following the path because what I had done wasn't following a particular path.

following what my higher self said. And this is what I do for my clients as well. You see, if we all had to take just one path, then there's so many experts out there. There people who teach you how to be great on YouTube or Instagram or so on. Like there are just so many experts, so many books, so many courses. But the reason why it might not work for you is because your soul's journey might not be really aligned to that one.

So it's not the right fit for you. So when I started working with my clients, I would look at what is their higher self-wanting? What is their higher purpose? Like, what is their offer? Like, who is their ideal client? What places should they go out? How should they promote themselves? And we started working on that. And that's how my clients just started making or getting clients and having profitable businesses really quickly. So now I have...

I have a program called business expansion accelerator, I show people how to have a profitable business from the starting of an idea and have it profitable and running in eight weeks. Really? Like it just takes them four weeks and they'll start attracting the clients and I'm not asking you to do like all the crazy reels or so on. It's really you do you the way you want to express yourself. That's okay.

Kanika | Energy Coach (53:36.386)
But we finalize your offer, we bring that into the world. And so I help them shift the energy of themselves so that they are more attractive. Remember how I was saying that I manifested my jobs and I manifested my promotion. Partly what was happening was I was just cleaning my energy and I was becoming a lot more magnetic to people around me. And this is why I noticed with my clients as well that

Earlier, they might find it very hard to even fill a low ticket membership because people are not buying it. And then they'll go out in the groceries or they'll get a haircut and they just talk about what they do and people lean in and people are like, hey, can you have my phone number? Because I really want to have a call with you and we should discuss this further because the energy is so cleaned and the message is so clear that clients actually lean in. So that's what I love doing with my clients now. And I love it because

It is such a ripple effect. If we can have more people like this who are living that present embodied life, it is such an inspiration to everybody around and such a transformation for the whole world.

Chelsea Myers (54:48.175)
Yeah, I completely agree and I've, I am super intrigued. This is very much my vibe. Like I said earlier, I am very much into energy and what connects us and.

I've loved being able to, like I said, we've only been chatting for a little while and I'm only getting to know you for a small piece, but being able to hold space and learn about this journey and these, I know there's so much more and it's so complex, but from what I've been able to gain and to witness.

it really is beautiful to hear you talk about not only like the journey of you as a whole, as a person, as a mother, as a business owner, and how they all connect to each other to to sort of bring you I don't want to say the life that you imagined because I'm sure there are certain parts of your life that you did not imagine this way.

Kanika | Energy Coach (55:52.87)
but I think all of this has been such a blessing. I honestly think that. I don't wish it on anyone, but I look at my life before and after my daughter, and I love the Kanika that I am now. I love what I can bring to the world now.

Chelsea Myers (55:56.324)
Yeah.

Chelsea Myers (56:10.811)
I, I, that is, my word is beautiful. I say this to guests all the time. I need to like, I need to look at some more adjectives because beautiful is my go-to word. But I really, I do, I think it's beautiful. I, I love the energy that I am getting from you this morning is so grounding. And so I don't usually start my Friday mornings like this, just so you know.

it's usually a lot more chaos and going on this journey with you has been so grounding and so I'm so honored that you have shared this journey or part of this journey with me. Before I wrap us up and before I bring us back home with my with my final question

Kanika | Energy Coach (56:49.165)
Thank you.

Chelsea Myers (57:01.659)
All of this will be linked in the show notes, but if my listeners want to learn more about you and working with you, where's the best place for them to look?

Kanika | Energy Coach (57:13.417)
Yeah, you can find me on Instagram or LinkedIn at Kanika Energy Coach. That's the best place. Otherwise, if you want to reach out to me, have a chat. I'd love to know your story. I can be reached at Art of Life Center, A-R-T-R-T-O-F, Life, L-I-F-E, Center, C-E-N-T-E-R, artoflifecenter.com slash call. That's where you can book some time with me as well.

Chelsea Myers (57:39.46)
love it. And again, listeners, please check the show notes. That's where all of this good information is. So I'm doing something different this season than I have in seasons past. And maybe this will resonate with you. Because it all kind of has to do with with the universe and connecting us and how we're all connected. But I'm kind of harkening us back to before the days where we were all instantly reachable.

where you had to call somebody and leave a message if they weren't there. So you have called in to Quiet Connection today. You don't know who my next guest is going to be. I'm going to be meeting with them in less than an hour, but you don't know anything about them. You don't know anything about their story, but they weren't here to answer. And so you're going to leave them a message and you can interpret that in whatever way you want. You can leave them a message that you want them to take away from your story.

You can leave them a message about life in general, whatever you feel called to leave for my next guest. The fun part for me is that I'm going to check back in with you guys later because you're going to have to listen to the episode before yours to get your message and see if it resonated with you. But for now, what message would you like to leave for my next guest on Quiet Connection?

Kanika | Energy Coach (59:02.999)
Go have fun by yourself.

Chelsea Myers (59:06.48)
Yeah.

Kanika | Energy Coach (59:07.691)
Yeah, just be yourself. I think it sounds so simple, right? Be yourself. And yet we are always putting on masks. So the invitation is just go out, have fun and just be you. Like do you, enjoy you, be you.

Chelsea Myers (59:23.867)
I think I needed to hear that message too. So I'm going to claim that for me too, but it's also for the next guest. Yes.

Kanika | Energy Coach (59:29.261)
Yes, it's meant for the listener. It's meant for the next person. Yes.

Chelsea Myers (59:35.673)
Yeah, well, I just again, I want to thank you so, so much for your vulnerability, for your honesty and for sharing space with me today. I really appreciate it.

Kanika | Energy Coach (59:47.777)
Thanks a lot, Chelsea, it's been so much fun, I'm honored

Chelsea Myers (59:51.004)
Alright, I'm gonna hit stop.


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