EP13: Building a new relationship with confidence

Today's episode is all about how we can build confidence like a muscle. I throw in some modalities that have helped me understand myself, the more we understand ourselves, the more confidence we can build.  This episode is all about being honest with ourselves, and the lesson I am learning currently about building my confidence. 

Human Design Chart:
https://www.myhumandesign.com/get-your-chart/
https://www.myhumandesign.com/app/

Podcast mentioned: 
https://youtu.be/OayWb7gR1BA?si=50WGSed2W8bvvNzZ



FOLLOW ME: 
https://www.instagram.com/fluidity_hannahmae/


https://www.instagram.com/hannah_mae_snyder/


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Transcript

0:05

​you're not born with confidence where you are when you're younger, you have all the confidence in the world, but then somewhere along the way we lose it. And that's by design. We're meant to lose that confidence so we can find it in a bigger and better, more evolved way. I just want to remind you guys that don't let the fear of not being perfect stop you from being good. truly getting out of the victim mind mindset and thinking, why isn't it here yet? Why do they have an, I don't, it's not what do they have that I don't, it's what did they do that you didn't. and putting yourself where you want to be. Hi friends, welcome back to the fluidity podcast. My name is Hannah. I am your host and today we got a solo episode. I know you guys are used to hearing solo episodes, but we are going to have some guests coming on the podcast. I was supposed to have one today, but some things happened. So I decided just to do a quick solo episode. I do have some guests lined up though. So look out for that the next couple of episodes coming up. So I wasn't going to record today because of, I have a guest and I was like, you know what, I'm just not going to record. And then someone came over me and I was like, you know what, guests or not, I'm fricking going to record. I have nothing really planned as far as a solo episode, but we are going to wing it, which I feel like I do that a lot. But what has been really coming through for me? The last, I would say really strongly the last two weeks, but honestly for a long time, is confidence. I, for a long time, subconsciously, deep down, had this belief that confidence comes with you when you're born. And the people that are born confident, they're confident. The people that are not confident, that's just how they are. And, more importantly, the Me because I wasn't because I didn't feel confident in things I felt that meant it wasn't there I had this belief that if you're good at something you should just be good at it right out the gate and Consciously, I know that's not true but Just having all these feelings come up the last couple of weeks. I know that there is a belief down there somewhere that if I don't have skills right away, then they're not there. And also really worried that if I'm not perfect or something's not perfect, that means that it's not going to work or I won't gain the wisdom and the traits through doing it. Now I see how much that, how that is not true. Before human design, I honestly don't know if I probably I would have got there, it would have taken me a lot longer, but human design really helped me see. You cannot reach your gifts, your power, if you don't go through the dark, the shadow. And I was hitting a lot of resistance lately because, or at least internal resistance, because I had all these expectations of doing things and them being easy. and them feeling effortless. And if they weren't effortless, then that meant I wasn't effortless. meant to do this. And the truth is, especially with my human design, the way I learn is through experience, through doing, through a lot of trial and error. And if you're interested to know this is, I'm talking about your profile in human design. If you go and look, I'll leave a link below to your chart. You can go and see what profile you have. And Jenna Zoe, I love the way she explains things. So I will. leave down in the description box where to find your chart and she gives you a little explanation on your profile. But the reason why I make this distinction through human design is we all learn differently. We all gain our confidence. Confidence differently, but I feel that one overarching theme is that I believe that because My profile it literally is the profile where we learn the hard way. I'm a 3 5 and that three line is all about trial and error and If I have not if I did not know about human design, I don't think I would open myself up to this much trial and error and not be so hard on myself, even though at times it's still a muscle that I have to flex to not be hard on myself. And remember that again, the confidence, the wisdom is gained through me doing and sometimes failing to see what doesn't work. And going back to the confidence thing. Regardless of what your profile is, I do believe that there is an overarching theme of being scared to try something if you're not perfect. Now, I can't really speak on anyone else's part because I only know my experience, but I know that I am I'm fucking scared of doing things and failing and what perfect profile to learn through with a 3 5 having to literally how I learn is failing and figure out what doesn't work to see what does. human design just gives such a beautiful framework to seeing and learning. where our challenges are and where we're meant to overcome those challenges to get to the power to our gifts. And what I really do love about human design as well is every gift that you have, you get to that gift through your shadow, through the low expression, you get to the high expression through the low expression, and there's no high expression without the low expression. So really reframing your mindset to, there's no light, Without the dark and there's nothing wrong with me failing and Feeling uncapable and things I've never done before. How can I? expect myself to Be good at things. I've never tried and That goes with a lot of things in life. Like I said, it's not just the three five, but it's I believe knowing your profile really does give you a little bit more insight into how you learn and how you're meant to go through life, how you're supposed to experience life and how, yeah, just how you're supposed to do this thing called life. Cause not everyone's meant to do it the same. Another thing I want to touch on is I feel like what has stopped me in the past is waiting to feel that 100 percent confident in the thing, 100 percent secure that I'm going to be perfect in it. And if I'm not, then I don't really want to do it. And that's what stopped me in the past. Getting out of your own way and letting yourself experience these things, And have fun with it and not be so attached to the outcome really does lighten things up and it gives you a sense of freedom and room to try things out and make mistakes regardless if you're a 3 5 or not. You're going to make mistakes. You're going to learn from them. It's just three fives make a little way more than some of the other profiles. But it's again inevitable that you're going to make mistakes. So I feel very called to talk about this because I feel that with maybe the three line, it really sheds a light on this aspect of us, which we all have a little bit of this trial and error in us. It's just, some of us has more than others. And the more you get into human design, the more you'll see that different gates have different profiles. And I'm not going to get into that today, but just know that you do somewhere, probably in your chart, have a little bit of a three line in there. And regardless, you're going to go through trial and error you're not born with confidence where you are when you're younger, you have all the confidence in the world, but then somewhere along the way we lose it. And that's by design. We're meant to lose that confidence so we can find it in a bigger and better, more evolved way. And I just want to remind you guys that don't let the fear of not being perfect stop you from being good. I don't know if that's the exact quote, but hopefully you guys get what I'm putting down. I the last couple months I've had this deep like nagging and just like fear of getting it wrong, fear of not being perfect, fear of name it. I've got it. What I realized is I was being the victim. I wanted to already be at my final destination. I want it to be. I already had my business, already had my podcast, all evolved. I wanted to just be already at my dream destination. And I was feeling sorry for myself that I had to put in the work and I, this was all under the surface. I didn't really realize it was there until. Recently and it will come up when it's ready and it did so Yeah, we feel sorry for ourselves and we feel Like why isn't our dream here yet? Why isn't it here? And it's hard truth that you're not going to get to where you want to go unless you put in the work And unless you put one foot in front of the other you're not going to get there and this goes back to manifestation and things like that. Sometimes we think manifestation is okay We just think really hard and dream really hard about it and we'll get it. That's not it There's a whole other part of action putting in aligned action putting in aligned action is the number one piece to getting to where you want to go and The universe gives you breadcrumbs and you follow them But if you're not putting in the work and putting yourself in situations to where you might not be comfortable but You It's going to teach you to be comfortable in those uncomfortable situations. So the more that you put yourself in these uncomfortable situations, you learn, and then you go to the next level, and then the next level, and it never stops. We're never really going to a destination. We are on a path. There does come a point, I believe, that you have more clarity of what your path is, but it's always evolving. And I got lost there for a second, but truly getting out of the victim mind mindset and thinking, why isn't it here yet? Why do they have an, I don't, it's not what do they have that I don't, it's what did they do that you didn't. and putting yourself where you want to be. If you want to, let's say, make a podcast and own your own business, you have to start making podcasts. You're not going to be good at it. I'm in my first pocket. I'm still fucking learning, but I'm on my first podcast. I feel like I've grown a lot since then. It's only been what, 13 episodes now, but I'm still, I still get nervous to get on the mic. I still don't want to do it. I still feel I'm not the best and sometimes I want to quit, but there is an, there is a deep rooted knowing that this is what I'm meant to do. And this might not be forever. I don't know where it's taking me, but for right now I know that It's where my soul is leading me to. And that doesn't mean that I won't come with my ego fighting and not wanting to come on the mic because it's scared of getting rejected. It's scared of feeling not good because guess what? I haven't done it for that long, so I don't have the experience. And we learn by. Over and over again, showing up for ourselves and showing up for our dreams. And yeah, sometimes it's uncomfortable and that's going to bring up a lot of the inadequacy or the fear of failing. And when we push through that fear and we do it anyway, that's where we open ourselves up to the bigger ideas, the confidence. I was listening to a podcast with Roddy Shetty And I can't remember who else, who her guest was. I freaking love her. I'll put it, I'll put the podcast in the description box cause it was utterly amazing. It was, it totally changed my mindset looking at confidence. They were talking about confidence, like a muscle. You're not going to gain the confidence and gain. Yeah, you're not going to gain the confidence. not doing the thing that scares you. You're going to gain the confidence doing the thing that scares you. Seeing the fears and riding through it. You can't jump over it. You got to go through it. And that's again, why I bring human design into this and why I think the system is so beautiful is that every single gift starts with a shadow. It goes shadow, gift, wisdom. You don't get there without going through the darkness and feeling the low expression of it because you have to gain that gift you have to go through the depth in the dark to gain that knowledge and the juiciness of the gift and Yeah, I am just I'm with you though. Like it can feel scary and our human brain will Wants to make everything so complicated and wants to keep us small. So it's going to do its absolute best to make us scared of the shadow or the low expression or the Inadequacy, it's gonna want to keep us away from feeling that so what does it do? It's gonna tell us that we're not good enough so we don't do it So we don't try but that's the gate that's the whole point of this life is to get past ourselves because really the only one that puts those roadblocks in our way is us And we chose to do that. And once you look at it from that perspective, everything changes and you mess up, you fail, but it doesn't knock you down. It puts a smile on your face. Cause you go, I'm so much closer than I, than where I was through that mistake. I fucking learned. And. Next time I'm going to be better, even if it's 0. 1 percent better, that's all that matters. Because again, it's not about the destination. It's about who we become in the process. And we are already whole as we are. It's an illusion that we're not. And how fun is it to go down this path, not knowing how the gifts are going to manifest in our life, how we're going to use them. And the cool thing is we don't have to know where we're going because the universe is guiding us. And it's really about coming back to trust and certainty beyond logic. The universe source has our back because we're part of it. We are all. A piece of the puzzle of this big picture and it's not easy and I won't lie and say that it is because it's certainly not. Dang, is it not easy? But guess what? It can be so bright and beautiful and once we make friends with our dark sides and the parts that we don't like or we think that are ugly, once we make friends with those And the fears, once we make friends with the fears, they're not fears anymore. And they honestly, the fears were never bad. They were never a fear. They were the light disguised as dark. I don't know if that makes sense. It made sense. I was saying it, but the darkness is. Our biggest teacher and our biggest gift because it leads us to the gift of service, what we're meant to give to the world. So I hope this landed with you guys. It was just a quick episode that I felt called to talk about I'm going to have my guest on hopefully next week. We will see. I'm not sure when he's coming on, but I have two guests lined up and so excited to introduce them to you guys. If this landed with you guys, please subscribe, follow me on Instagram. I would love to Connect with you guys. I, as I'm a new podcaster. So any feedback that you guys have for me, I would greatly appreciate it. I would love to know what resonates, what doesn't. And yeah, just say hi. Cause I want to talk to you guys. You guys are awesome. I love you so dearly. And whoever's out there that's listening to the very end of this, thank you so much. And just know that you're not alone. Confidence is a muscle. We have to build it. And I don't think that fear ever really goes away. I think that we learn to be friends with it. All right guys, peace out.