Stepping Into 2025: Navigating Grief and New Beginnings

How do you step into a new year when grief still lingers?

Emily reflects on life after loss, sharing how New Year's became an unexpected emotional hurdle after losing her husband Colby.

She offers comforting advice for those facing grief, hardships, or transitions in 2025, emphasizing the power of presence, self-care, and setting boundaries.

Emily also encourages you to cherish life’s small moments and reminding you that healing is a deeply personal journey.

Listen For:
02:25 - The emotional weight of leaving a loved one behind in a new year
04:58 - Why "New Year, New Me" might not resonate with everyone
08:31 - The importance of setting boundaries in the new year
12:02 - Cherishing the little things before they’re gone

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Transcript

Emily Cave Boit (00:00):

Hey everyone. Welcome back to the first episode of You Are More Podcast with Emily Cave Boit of 2025. I hope you guys had a good holiday season if you didn't. I am so sorry about that, and I kind of want to start the podcast with this. I'm doing another solo podcast. The Christmas Eve was solo and this one's solo. I just feel like the holidays bring a lot of emotions and these holidays in particular bring extra emotions. So I wanted to do kind of short, sweet solo podcasts to just provide encouragement for you guys during these big transition weeks. And just going back to 2020, I never imagined one of the hardest holidays after losing Colby would be New Year's and New Year's Day, new Year's Eve and New Year's Day. That wasn't on my radar. I knew our wedding anniversary would be hard. I knew birthdays would be hard.

(01:20):

I knew his death's anniversary would be hard, but New Year's, even New Year's shocked me on how painful and triggering and it was for the reason of Colby staying in 2020 and he will never get to experience in 2021. And I was moving into a new year without him. And the survivor's guilt that came with that I just never expected would come on that holiday. I didn't think that holiday would be triggering. So I wanted to start with that because I know there's a lot of people that have lost loved ones in 2024 and going to 2025 just seems like, oh, that, I'm pretty sure I wrote it in my book, that Stupid Ball Drops and it's another year without them. So I just wanted to validate that right away because I just remember 2021 just not feeling good about it because for me, 2020 was the year I lost Colby.

(02:25):

The year I became a widow, the year I learned what a colloid system meant for the first time the year I learned about cremation, the year I learned about so many things that I never expected In 2019, I posted this photo of me and Colby on New Year's Eve at a team party, and I was like, can't wait to see what 2020 has in store. And I had no idea. So I wanted to start that off with anyone that just feels about leaving their loved one in 2024 or whether you lost your job in 2024 or were going through financial struggles or had a horrible diagnosis in 2024 that it's okay to feel not like New year, new me in 2025 because I definitely did not feel that way. But in saying that now, being in 2025, I feel like there are so many moments looking back.

(03:31):

I saw a quote recently on Instagram and it was about being present in the moment, being present in the photos that are happening currently right now because 2020, even though it feels like it was just yesterday, it also feels like it was forever ago. And in 2040 or 2050 this year, 2025 is going to feel so different, which can be a blessing and it can be scary for people that are struggling right now. I hope as hard as it is, because if someone told me this in 2021, I would tell them to screw off. But the pain you are experiencing now, you may weirdly miss in 10 years, and the hardships you are going through now are going to be a fond memory and feel so distanced, but they're going to be a part of your journey. And I think that's really important to remember this year and whatever happens, this people will talk about New Year's Eve or New Year's resolutions, new Year, new me.

(04:58):

And there's always the jokes of how the gyms are full the first week and then they slow down, or you want to read so many books or you want to have this big checklist of things you want to do. And I think that's really great at times. But at the same time, for people that are in the midst of pain and struggling, it can be really, really overwhelming. And if it's overwhelming, that's okay because some people, for a new Year resolution, it may just be getting through another day. And I say that because the days feel like they go by so slow and you don't know how you're going to get through another day. But when you look back, the years go by so fast. So since losing Colby, I feel like my New Year resolutions, even though I don't really like making resolutions, because you never know what life's going to throw at in 2025 or any year is to be more present in the little things.

(06:04):

You don't need the big things. You don't need big resolutions, but to cherish everything that 2025 will bring. So yeah, I kind of wanted to talk a little bit about that. I hope I kind of addressed that point in one of my favorite quotes. I kind of said it in a book, but it's no one can teach you anything about healing that you are not already going to discover for yourself, but other people can let you see that you made it through the same kind of pain, the same kind of heartbreak, the same kind of trauma. Other people can teach you how to be there for the person behind you, because at the end of the day, we are all just walking each other home and none of us know what 2025 is going to bring any of us. I hope that it brings a lot of people love and compassion and good times, but there will also be hardships and there will also be pain, and there will also be loss.

(07:09):

And if you look at it, it can be really, really scary and it can be heartbreaking and it can be unbearable, but at the same time, it can also provide hope because like I said, my outlook on life and the way I live my life from 2020 never would have imagined I would be on this podcast in 2025 remarried and where I am today. And I hope that brings people hope in this new year. You don't need life changing big resolutions or just take it one step at a time. So that's kind of my New Year's Eve advice. But in saying that, I'm very excited for some guests coming in on the podcast in 2025. Like I said, I love getting all your guys' reviews or comments, et cetera, and I want to definitely get more variety on the podcast. So one thing that I'm looking at doing is nominating someone to come on and share their stories.

(08:31):

I love having a wide mixture of different people's stories, not just widowhood and grief. So I'm really looking forward to that and all the podcast episodes in 2025. Looking at some of the questions you guys have sent me in some of the q and as that I have done, one of the things that comes up is talking about what you can do to support ones, which I kind of addressed on the Christmas Eve episode. However, another one is about setting boundaries with loved ones to just kind of protect yourself and your grieving or whatever you may be going through. And I think that's something that I'm really going to be honest focus on in 2025 too. I feel like boundaries, the word boundaries always scared me. When I originally heard it, I felt like it was pushing people away, but I've learned over the few years it actually was at the expensive me at times and my emotions.

(09:37):

And I think it's really important to talk about that going into the new year. If we're talking about New Year new me and doing what's best for you and your mental health and your journey and your struggles and boundaries, you guys ask me about them a lot. I am working on 'em. I am definitely no pro on how to do it, but that's something that is going to be one of the things that I work on in the new year and what is good for me and my mental health and my grief. And I know that there's a lot of other people that struggle or I don't know if struggle is the, well, yeah, I know struggle to set boundaries, but I think, yeah, it's really important to focus on yourself. Actually, this is my advice for people that are struggling going into 2025, a little bit extra, make it a self-care year.

(10:40):

And I know that can come up very selfish at times, and I do struggle with self-care and boundaries, but I think that's the best way to have the best version of you because you can't fill other people's cups when your cup is empty. And I know if you have kids or partners or work, that can be really hard to do. But that's one thing that I have learned the past five years is there was times where I needed to focus on my healing and I didn't, and it actually kind of made things worse at times. So that would be some of my New Year's Eve or New Year advice for those that ask that question. Another thing I know I said at the beginning of the episode, but cherish and be present this year and the big things and the small things and the annoying things and the everyday things, whether it's sitting beside a coworker and them asking how your day was or how you're driving to the office was, or your kid's asking you to help them tie up their shoes or your teenage kid being on their phone.

(12:02):

Well, I know I feel bad for my parents about that one a lot, but just being present in those moments because you don't know what this year is going to bring. And you don't want to look back in 2026 and be like, oh, I wish I did that in 2025. I wish I was more present. Because you can never, ever, ever get back time. And as I said, the days are long, but the years are short, and so many things big and smaller are going to happen in 2025 that you unfortunately are not going to be able to get back until you maybe realize it's too late. So again, not saying that to be morbid or scare you guys, but saying that as a reminder to just be present and cherish the little things that you don't think are big things, because at the end of the day, the little things are the big things. So that would be another New Year's Eve tip.

(13:08):

As we step into 2025, I just want to remind you to take it one step at a time, whether it's focusing on being present, setting boundaries, or finding small ways to take care of yourself. It's okay to go at your own pace. Life can be overwhelming, and it's in the little moments that we find the most meaning. Thank you for taking your time and spending time with me today and listening to the URR podcast. If this episode brought you any comfort or made you feel less alone, it means the world to me. Remember, as I always say, we're just walking each other home and no one has to do it alone. Stay tuned for the incredible guests in 2025 and the stories that we'll have this year. I honestly can't wait to share them with you. As always, feel free to share your thoughts, questions, reviews, or stories with me. But until next time, take care of yourself and don't forget that you are more. I'll see you in the next episode.