97 | This Is 60: A New Way to Step Into This Decade

Are you approaching a milestone birthday and feeling a mix of excitement and that quiet inner voice telling you to slow down, fade back, or play small? You are not alone — and in this special solo episode of Pleasure in the Pause, host Gabriella Espinosa turns 60 and invites you into one of the most honest, tender, and empowering conversations she has ever shared.

This is not a list of anti-aging tips. This is a celebration of what it means to grow into yourself — more rooted, more unapologetic, and more alive than ever — while also being real about the moments when the old stories still creep in.

Highlights from this episode include:

• Why turning 60 doesn't feel like fading. It feels like a deepening, and how Gabriella is stepping into this decade with more of herself, not less.
• The heavy cloak moment: how even the most grounded women can still be visited by the voice that says you've had your moment, and what to do when it shows up.
• How to move through life's transitions from a place of growth and openness rather than fear and uncertainty.
• Why “you don't look 60" is a compliment worth questioning, and the words that actually honor a woman at this stage of life.
• A powerful reflection prompt to help you ask: Who is the woman I am becoming now?

Midlife is not the beginning of decline. It is a threshold — a moment to shed the roles, the expectations, and the versions of yourself that no longer fit. If something in this episode landed for you, notice where you are already choosing not to shrink. Then share this episode with one woman who needs to hear it. That is how we change the narrative together.

CONNECT WITH GABRIELLA ESPINOSA:

Instagram

LinkedIn

Work with Gabriella! 

Full episodes on YouTube.

The information shared on Pleasure in the Pause is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or Pleasure in the Pause.

Transcript

Gabriella Espinosa 0:27

Welcome to Pleasure in the Pause, a podcast dedicated to empowering midlife women to connect with their bodies, pleasure, and power in Perimenopause, Menopause, and beyond. I am your host, Gabriela Espinosa. Each week I sit down with leading medical experts, thought leaders, and trailblazers for bold, thought-provoking conversations that educate, inspire, and challenge the myths we've been taught about our bodies, aging, and sexuality. I also share solo episodes with evidence-based insights and real talk to help you feel informed, supported, and in charge of your health and pleasure in this season of life. Because your pleasure matters in and out of the bedroom. So take a deep breath, settle into your body, and let's begin. Hello, beautiful listeners. Welcome back to Pleasure in the Pause. I've been looking forward to today's episode for a while, actually for months. The day I've been talking about has arrived. I turned 60 this week, on Easter Sunday to be exact. And there's something about arriving in this new decade that feels different. And there's nothing more I love than celebrating with the people I care about. So I just want to bring you into this moment with me. I actually kicked off my birthday celebrations a little earlier last month with a beautiful gathering at my home. One of those evenings where you just pause and really take it all in, surrounded by women, friends who took time out of their busy lives to celebrate with me. The evening was filled with conversation, laughter, delicious food and drink, and a throwback eighties playlist that had all of us feeling completely ourselves. And I remember this moment. And I just thought, wow, this is my life now. This is sixty. And what struck me was this season doesn't feel small. It doesn't feel quiet. It doesn't feel like I'm fading into the background. It feels so full, full of connection, full of depth, full of pleasure, full of women showing up for each other in a way that feels real. And it reminded me of something I know to be true, but we don't always say it out loud. We don't rewrite the narrative around aging on our own. We do it in community, in rooms like that, with women who reflect something back to us. Because we've been given this script about aging, that after a certain age we become less visible, less relevant, less central to the story. But the way I feel and what I experienced in that room just doesn't match that narrative. It feels very different. Softer in some ways, stronger in others, more intentional, more unapologetic, and honestly feeling more alive than ever. And I really wish this for every midlife woman arriving at a milestone year. If you listened to my episode exactly one year ago about turning 59, it was titled 12 life-changing lessons that made my 50s the most powerful decade yet. You'll know that my 50s gave me everything. My voice, my work, my trust in my body, and a relationship with pleasure I didn't even know was possible. And I meant every word of that. And yet, somewhere in this final year, something else crept in quietly, like a fog, you don't notice it arriving. And then one day you realize something has shifted. Because even as I felt more alive, more rooted, more myself than ever, there was this other voice in the background. Gabriela, now you're really old. Maybe it's time to slow down, fade a little. You've had your moment. And it felt like this heavy cloak that someone kept trying to place over my shoulders. And I kept shaking it off, and it kept coming back. And I think what this past year has really shown me is that you can feel deeply rooted in yourself and still have moments where those old stories come back, where you question yourself, where you feel that pull to shrink or step back or play small. And I didn't want to bypass all of that because it would be easy for me to sit here and say, I feel more confident than ever, more embodied than ever, more alive than ever. And that's true, but it's not the whole truth. The whole truth is those old narratives don't just disappear. They do soften, they do loosen, but they still visit. And what's different now is not that they're completely gone, it's that I don't believe them in the same way. I notice them, I feel them, I say hello to them and say, thanks for visiting, but you can leave now. What's different now is that I have more capacity to choose something else. And I think this is where something has really shifted for me, especially as I step into this next decade. Because I've been reflecting a lot on how we move through change, how we move through transition. And what I'm realizing is we can move through it from a place of fear, of uncertainty, of not quite knowing what's ahead, or we can begin to meet it from a place of growth, of openness, of really paying attention to what's unfolding and what might still be ahead. And if I'm honest, some of the time it's both. I feel both. There are moments where I feel expansive and excited. And there are moments where things feel uncertain, tender, unfamiliar. But what feels important is remembering that I have a choice in how I meet those moments. And for me, that choice doesn't come from pushing through or pretending things aren't changing, because they are. And from that place, this doesn't feel like an ending. It doesn't feel like a slowing down. It feels like a shift, like I'm stepping into this next decade with more of myself, not less. Because for women like us, this isn't where things wind down. It's where things deepen. And something interesting keeps happening when I tell people my age. There's a look of surprise, a little hesitance. And then you don't look 60. And of course, I appreciate the compliment, the kindness. I'll I'll take it any day. But I've been sitting with what that moment reveals. Society carries a certain image of what a woman at this age is supposed to look like. We've been fed these images through the media, film, through stories that were frankly very unkind to women of a certain age. And when someone doesn't match that, we're taken aback, as if aging well means hiding that you've aged at all. But here's what I keep coming back to. I don't want to be 40. I don't want to be 50. I lived those decades fully, and I learned and grew so much. I loved that woman. I don't want to go backwards. I want to go forward with all the gifts this one precious life has given me. The vitality, the wisdom, the self-trust, the comfort of being in my own skin. So what if we moved toward a different kind of recognition when we meet a woman of a certain age? How about you look radiant? You carry yourself with so much grace. You seem so confident in yourself. You look strong. I love the energy you bring into a room. I can feel the wisdom you have to share with the world. These statements honor the person instead of unintentionally comparing her to her younger self. This is what 60 feels like to me. Before we close, I want to offer you something. A question I've been sitting with, and I imagine you are too. Who am I becoming? Not who I was, not who I've been told to be. Who is the woman emerging now? So I'd like to invite you to close your eyes for a moment and take a nice deep inhale in and a long slow exhale out. And imagine her. How does she move? How does she take up space? What does she no longer apologize for? What does she say yes to? And most importantly, how does she feel in her body? Because midlife isn't the beginning of decline. It's an awakening to your wisdom, to your innate gifts, to your truth. It is a threshold, a moment where you begin to shed the roles, the expectations, the versions of yourself that no longer fit. And from this place, you get to ask yourself different questions. Not what should I be doing, or what do I need to prove, but who am I becoming now? What do I want to create in this next chapter? What actually brings me pleasure? And what is my heart quietly asking for that I haven't yet fully allowed? Because something does begin to shift here when you ask those questions. You're no longer trying to prove yourself to the world. You're not striving in the same way. You're building from experience, from everything you've lived through and learned. And that becomes your foundation. From that place, you don't need to have everything figured out. You just begin to move a little more honestly, a little more in tune and connected to yourself, a little more willing to trust what's emerging. And that is enough to guide you. And I also know this we don't rewrite this story alone. It takes all of us. It takes us speaking about aging out loud, not whispering it, not hiding it. It takes us sharing our stories, being honest about what this season really feels like. It takes us showing up in our lives, in our friendships, in our communities, visibly, unapologetically, fully ourselves. Because every time one of us does that, the narrative begins to loosen its grip. And it becomes more possible for the women around us and the women coming after us to see themselves differently, to trust themselves more deeply, to take up space in their lives without apology, and to feel at home in who they are becoming. So if something in this episode landed for you, I just invite you to notice where this is already happening in your life, the conversations you're having, the way you're showing up, the moments where you choose not to shrink, not to hide or make yourself smaller. Because this is how we change the narrative together. And everyday moments where we choose to be more of ourselves. Thank you so much for being here and celebrating with me. It really does mean a lot. I can't wait to continue this conversation and changing the narrative together. Until next time, remember, your pleasure matters. Thank you for joining me for this episode of Pleasure in the Pause. Want to help me spread more pleasure in the world? Please hit subscribe to the podcast and share this episode with a friend, a sister, or any woman you care about. Because when we share these conversations, we remind each other we are not alone. Together, we create ripples of empowerment and support that reach far beyond ourselves. Your support means the world to me. Thank you. Remember, your pleasure matters. The information shared on this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only, and is not intended as medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider before making any decisions about your health or treatment. The views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the host or pleasure in the pause.