Quiet No More

Facing Inequality and Embracing Diversity

• Carmen Cauthen

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"You're not like most black people."
 
How often have we heard this statement, and how does it reflect the broader misconceptions about race? In this episode of "Quiet, No More" I, Carmen Cauthen, dig into these stereotypes and share my personal stories that highlight the rich diversity within the Black community. By challenging the notion that race can—or should—be ignored, I aim to draw attention to how race is an integral part of our identities. We must confront these biases to foster genuine interracial friendships and recognize systemic advantages that often go unnoticed.

Exploring further, we walk through the systemic inequalities that have shaped the lives of Black, Indigenous, and Native American communities, from the biased structures of education and criminal justice to neighborhood disparities. Personal anecdotes illustrate these challenges, driving home the need for committed parental involvement in a child's education. It's not just about facing present barriers—it's about acknowledging the past. 

By uncovering the untold stories of enslaved Black individuals who contributed massively to America's infrastructure, I urge us to remember and honor our ancestors' legacies, advocating for these stories to be shared and celebrated.

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Carmen Wimberley Cauthen is an author, speaker, and lover of history, Black history in particular. As a truth teller, she delights in finding the hidden truths about the lives of people who made a difference - whether they were unknown icons or regular everyday people.

To Learn more of Carmen:
www.carmencauthen.com
www.researchandresource.com

Speaker 1:

unseen, unheard. We've lived like that far too long. I'm carmen coffin and this is quiet, no more. You know, there have been things for years that white people have said that really bugged the hell out of me. One of them, especially from people who know that or who have been around me for a long time, who are white. They'll say you know, you're not like most black people. Well, how many of us do you know? We are not a monolith. We don't all act alike, dress alike, sound alike, look alike, smell alike, eat alike. We just don't. We're all different, just like y'all are all different. So here's a post that I wrote You're not like most black people, but I'm still black. How many black people do you know which parts are different? Will you turn on me if I do something you don't like as a white person, if I make you feel defensive about your whiteness? That's just one post.

Speaker 1:

The next thing that kind of grates on my nerve is when you tell me that you don't see race. Do you see me? You see my brown skin. It's not like your white, pink skin, and that's okay. I recognize your race, your constructed race, because we didn't come here like that. I recognize who you are. I recognize your individuality. I want mine recognized. There's no reason to not see the race that was constructed for me. I am a Black woman and that's fine and I like it that way. So you know, it's okay to see my race. It's not okay to make it be a negative thing, but it's okay to see it because that's who I am. Otherwise, you've kind of ignored a big part of who I am and please don't give me one about.

Speaker 1:

Well, I've got black friends, do you? Or do you just have some people that you work with who have brown skin? Do you go to their houses Notice I'm putting an S on them, because it's not about having one Do you go to their homes? Do you have meals with them? Do they come to yours? You know, one of the things I recognize as an adult was that, yes, I had what I considered white friends when I was growing up, but I started wondering about how often I went to visit them at their homes. It wasn't very often. It wasn't like my brother. My brother had friends and he went to their houses. There weren't any girls in my neighborhood but I still didn't remember going to their houses. I remember walking home with them from school and they would drop off at their house and I would keep going to mine. So that's different. That's a little bit different.

Speaker 1:

Sometimes in conversations I'll hear people say, well, how did they afford that? They went to work, just like you did. Or maybe their mom and daddy died and left them some money, just like yours did. Or maybe they worked two or three jobs because that's something that they had a goal to attain. That might not be something you had to do and please don't tell me.

Speaker 1:

I worked hard for what I got. I worked hard for what I got. Nothing was handed to me. That's not always true. When you're white, things are handed to you and you don't even know that your hand was out to receive them. And I'm not trying to be ugly, I'm just saying it's a fact.

Speaker 1:

If all the systems were created to make sure that white people were able to attain things or status, or money or money, and then when you see someone Black who attains something, that doesn't automatically say that everybody who's Black should be able to do that Some people were just able to attain beyond the system that was created to hold them back. I'm fortunate. I know I'm fortunate. My family expected me to go to college. My brother and I were not first generation to go to college. We had at least two generations prior that attended college, graduated, got additional degrees. So don't assume that because somebody's Black, that they are not able to attain things. Let me see what else do I have here.

Speaker 1:

It's hard to catch up with system inequalities, and that's one of the things that a lot of people don't understand that the systems that we live with the educational system, the criminal justice system, the political systems, the environmental systems, those things were all created to make sure that white people did well. And in order to make sure that white people did well, they had to hold somebody back, and so that was either indigenous people, native Americans or Blacks, and or both Americans or Blacks and or both. So systems were written, laws were created. Did you know that people who were of Indian descent, from India, became white or became Black based on the laws of our land? They thought in most cases that they were white until someone was taken to court and the court decided that they weren't.

Speaker 1:

So there are things that we have to think about, like when you go to the other side of town, you go to the black side of town you're not going to find as many grocery stores, you're not going to find as many banks, you're not going to find as many post offices. And in my neighborhood, if you're going to get some alcohol in the ABC store over in my neighborhood, you have to know what you want when you walk in the door, because there's plexiglass across the front. It's not like the ABC stores in other parts of town where you can walk in and you go into a well-lit department store for alcohol to get the rum you want to make your rum cake with. It's not the same. Look at the highway in the community where you live. Look at the fence that has been created on the backside of people's homes. Is it concrete? That's just concrete. Is it brick? Look at the different sides of town and see there are so many things that are different.

Speaker 1:

So, and because I'm an author, a lot of times I'll hear oh, you write so well and I'm having to learn to work with that one. But I've been told that I write well because white people didn't expect me to write well. If I'm going to the same school system that you're getting going to and I'm getting the same education that you're getting, then I should be writing well, just like you should be writing well. Don't expect my education to be different from yours. It is sometimes, but it doesn't have to be and it shouldn't be.

Speaker 1:

But way too often I find that young black children are not encouraged or pushed to go into classes that will teach them higher level or challenge them more, and that's a problem. It's a problem we don't need to be quiet about. We don't need to be quiet about parents. You need to be out there making sure your child is in the best spot for them, that they are challenged, because sometimes children who aren't challenged give up on learning, and I'm thankful that that was one of the things that my parents did was push to make sure that we were challenged and we were in classes that kept our minds active.

Speaker 1:

What about when you hear I'm proud of what America created. I'm proud of what we created? So often, especially in this day and age, there's no acknowledgement to the fact that Black people who were enslaved built most of what's here in America and they didn't get paid for it. You know, they didn't get paid for it. They just built it because that was what they were forced to do.

Speaker 1:

Those are things that frustrate me when I hear people who don't have any knowledge, who haven't been taught the correct history of our country, and so that's why I think it's important that we, as people who didn't help write the history, tell our own stories. Tell the stories of what happened in your family. Tell the stories of what happened in your family, tell what your bricklayer, your brickmason, your railroad engineer helped to build, because those are pieces that aren't in the fabric of our history and they aren't being taught to our young people, and they're important. And so you can't be quiet anymore about any of that. You've been listening to Quiet no More, where I share my journey. So you can be quiet, let's connect at wwwcarmencawthoncom. So you can be quiet, no more.