Growth Drivers

How To STOP Self-Sabotaging In 2025

• Mike & Rachael Novak

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Most people don’t realize that “good enough” is the real enemy.

In this episode of The Relentless Edge, we’re calling out complacency—how it creeps in, stalls your growth, and keeps you stuck when you were built for more.

Inspired by Good to Great by Jim Collins, we break down the difference between people who chase greatness… and people who settle.

We’re sharing:
— How to recognize when you’ve gone soft and started coasting
— The mindset shift that helped us raise our standards in marriage, business, and parenting
— Why you need personal rules that actually mean something
— What happens after you hit a peak… and how to avoid falling straight into a pit
— How to level up in Body, Being, Balance, and Business—without burning out

If you’re tired of watching other people grow while you spin your wheels, hit play.

We’ll show you exactly how to break out of “good enough” and build a life that actually excites you.

Listen in & let’s go.

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Mike Novak:

All right. We got a juicy one for you guys today. The Relentless Edge, Why Good Enough Will Bury You. When I think about this, I think about the book, Good to Great, and how so many companies get stuck in good being good enough, and very few over Breakthrough to Great. Have you read that book?

Rachael Novak:

Yes. It also reminds me of one of our teammates did a really excellent stack the other day about how high achievement is looked at as above and beyond for so much of society, when in reality, that's the standard for a lot of people who are just naturally high achievers. And if you're a high achiever and you've ever heard, well, you know, when is enough enough? Or like, when are you going to slow down? Or when are you going to stop to enjoy everything you've built? Or, you know, why do you need to make more? Why do you need to continue to work so much? If you've ever heard anything like that, you're probably a high achiever. And you probably, that is the unconscious people who love you and mean well, trying to pull you back down to a lower standard than you're capable of.

Mike Novak:

Yeah. I fucking hate when people say shit like that to me. I know. In fact, no one says that stuff to me anymore. They used to, and now they just, I think they're afraid to do it. They're like, oh, he crazy. So, I don't know. What am I going to say? It's been 20 years, bro. I don't think it's happening anytime soon. This is the case. Yeah. This is my life. So, yeah, no, I think this is really a conversation about standards. How do you up your standards? How do you, how do you imprint your standards from you as a person into your business? And then how do you elevate those around you to achieve that same standard? You know what I mean? And that is that transition from good to great. That's that transition into breakthrough. And that's the path of expansion and ascension of, of continually building and scaling, right? This is, this is not a conversation for people that are just like happy at the status quo.

Rachael Novak:

Right?

Mike Novak:

Like if you think everything is good, you can turn this podcast off right now. Cause you're probably not following us anyways because that's not the way that we roll they'd be so annoyed with us you should go and follow us yeah i know they'd be super annoyed because because we are on a relentless mission of expansion and ascension like that's what we're super passionate about and we've been told those same things that you you just said like so many different times like you know how much is enough or when are you going to be done or how long you're going to go this hard and you.

Rachael Novak:

Should be happy with what you have.

Mike Novak:

No one's ever said that one to me no i i Like, and that's the tricky part of this.

Rachael Novak:

Right? Like, this is why good enough will bury people. Because people will say things or that thought will come to you like, oh, well, I should just be happy with what I have. I should just be content and grateful for what I already have, right? And that isn't untrue, but it's also a trap. It's a trap.

Mike Novak:

It is a trap. So how do you raise your, like, because to raise your business standards, you have to raise your personal standards, right? So how do you start with raising your personal standards? Like, if someone's listening to this, they're like, shit, you know, Mike, Rach, that sounds good, but I don't even know where to start.

Rachael Novak:

Yeah.

Mike Novak:

Right? Like, what would you tell them, like, hey, this is how you're going to raise your standard?

Rachael Novak:

Well, I think, you know, we just talked a couple podcasts back about the relentless pursuit of mastery in all areas, right? And so it really comes down to following that framework. So if you haven't listened to that one, go back and listen to that one. But it's following that framework. It's first of all, I need to be aware and assess where am I actually at and where do I actually want to be. And not like, oh, I think I want to do that, but I feel judged and like, oh, I don't know. I don't know if I should or if I could. You know, it's like there's going to be all these distractions and all these voices that come to try to temper your high achievement, but you have to know where you're at first. And is this where I want to be? Is this, does this feel in alignment with my conscience, right? When I'm sitting with myself and thinking with myself and really assessing what I want out of life is what I'm currently living and what I'm actually pursuing in alignment with who I am and what I actually want. And if there is a disconnect, if there is that like, no, man, I'm a little bored or like I'm a little content or like I'm a little even frustrated. Like, I'm not where I want to be.

Mike Novak:

Or this life doesn't look the way I want it to look.

Rachael Novak:

Yeah.

Mike Novak:

Right. To me, that's really what you're describing is like an awakening, right?

Rachael Novak:

Totally.

Mike Novak:

Like the key to starting to raise your standards is to be discontent with where you're at.

Rachael Novak:

Yes.

Mike Novak:

Right. But to do that requires a conscious awareness and awakening that you're not happy with where you're at and that you're willing to face the truth of the reality that you find yourself in.

Rachael Novak:

So that, that for me is kind of the second part, right? It's like you're, you first kind of have to have that awareness, really assess it, and then you have to kind of accept. If I change these, if I update these standards for the people in my life, am I willing to deal with a fallout of that?

Mike Novak:

What do you mean by fallout?

Rachael Novak:

I've had many friendships, people who I love very, very dearly, and the way they live their life are not in alignment or at the level with which I want to live my life, right? That's not saying I'm better or they're worse or anything, just that the priorities that they prioritize week to week and day to day are not in alignment with what I prioritize. And so I have had to say, well, these are my priorities and I'm going to continue to pursue these regardless of if that means we maintain a really close relationship or not, right? And it's the shedding of who you were because a lot of people will continue to see you only who they've known you as, not who you're becoming. So as you become somebody different and as you evolve into somebody different everybody in your life has to get to know you as this new person right like we make the joke or I have made the joke forever that I've been married to like nine different Mike Novaks right like you've evolved and you've grown and you've become awakened you've shed things you've. Become and evolved such this incredible man and every time that you've evolved in some way, business, professionally, personally, physically, I've gotten to know this new person and I've gotten to love him again, right? And it's that same thing happens with relationships at work. That happens with friendships. It happens with family. And you have to be okay with that fallout of losing those close relationships and them not feeling the same anymore because you're continuing down the path of growth for yourself.

Mike Novak:

Right. If you change your standards, you will have to change the people that are around you.

Rachael Novak:

Exactly.

Mike Novak:

You can't do one without the other.

Rachael Novak:

Unless they change with you.

Mike Novak:

It just, it's super rare. Like you and I have changed together because of how like interconnected we are. But a lot of people don't do that. Like whether if it happens in marriages, it happens in friendships, it happens in business partnerships. So you have to, you have to be okay that you're going to not have some people around you that you currently have.

Rachael Novak:

Exactly.

Mike Novak:

Right. And that's the byproduct of elevating standards. Not everyone wants to have those higher standards. A lot of people are very happy being where they're at. good enough is good enough for them and that's their mindset that's the mindset of a stuck person though.

Rachael Novak:

Yeah it is that's a hundred percent yeah i mean that's and that's when a lot of people will silence that voice that they hear really deep down saying you're meant for more you deserve more you can achieve more and they push that down because of fear of loss and, current relationships people that they have people that they know they don't want to deal with the loss or the fallout of of losing those things so there's duck and they stay stuck intentionally so.

Mike Novak:

For people that are listening like what is an example of standards.

Rachael Novak:

So for instance um you know you and i have we've we've struggled forever like keeping friends right like um Um, we, we consistently will find like amazing, amazing people. Um, but a lot of times like they may be having like issues in their marriage or sometimes those people are really into an activity that we're not really into. And so if our standards are, you know, we go to bed pretty early, we don't really party at all. We don't stay up super late. We really, we like to enjoy alcohol a couple of times a year, but it's definitely not a regular thing at all. That's not going to be in alignment with people who want to get together and have margaritas all night or it's not going to be in alignment with with women who want to go to brunch and get wasted on mimosas every saturday right like there we have to maintain our standards and that means not being in those environments or not going in those environments and that that can be tough if those are friends and those are people that you care about but that's maintaining your personal standard how.

Mike Novak:

Did that morph like for you into an actual standard like how did you say like hey i'm who's not going to do these things.

Rachael Novak:

I mean, it really, it was the awareness of how those things make me feel, right? Like, I feel— Like.

Mike Novak:

Did you write it down and you're like, I'm not doing brunch anymore? No. I'm not staying up past, like, 11 o'clock. I'm still down for brunch.

Rachael Novak:

Like, okay, I'm still down for brunch. Not during prep, but I'm still down for brunch.

Mike Novak:

No, I think it's—it isn't necessarily that I sat—like.

Rachael Novak:

I wrote it down, but I saw after trend, after trend, after trend, I would—you know you wake up, especially after drinking, right? I mean, we were drinkers for many, many years. We were in the restaurant industry. We that's how we relax. That's how we connected. That's how we were social and fun. And so there's a lot of stigma around drinking and alcohol and what it can do for your social life. And then as we started slowing down and especially getting into like taking care of our bodies way more and really getting into preventative health and wanting to stay young, right? We're getting into our 40s. We want to live for a really long time. I want to look young and feel young and feel good. And if every time I had a couple of drinks one day in Dubai and I woke up the next morning dragging ass.

Mike Novak:

You know, like I didn't feel good.

Rachael Novak:

So it's just being aware of like, how does this make me feel? And is this feeling in alignment with what I need to get done the next day? If I'm a very mission oriented person and I spend time on Sundays planning my entire week and putting all these things into the calendar, what I need to get done and making sure that I'm following up and doing all these tasks, and then I do something that gets me out of the mood or out of the mindset or out of the physical capability of accomplishing those things, that's out of alignment with who I am. And that now is no longer part of the standard of how I live.

Mike Novak:

So you're creating alignment between actions and vision.

Rachael Novak:

Right?

Mike Novak:

And so that's where your standards are coming from. Craig Ballantyne, like a really famous coach and who coached us back in 2019, he actually takes it a step further and he's like, I want you to write out the rules of your life.

Rachael Novak:

Yeah.

Mike Novak:

Right. And I've, I've, I've often done that. Like if I feel like I'm waffling on my standards, I'm like, I need to reassess my rules. Like what am I non-negotiable rules? Like one of my non-negotiable rules is I won't get drunk ever. Like I don't remember the last time I got drunk, but I won't do it again. Like, because I hated the last time I felt that way. I, it made me feel that way multiple times throughout my life. I think it's really stupid. It's not in line with who I want to be. It's not, it doesn't help me say the right things to the people I care about. This is a bad place to be, right? So one of my rules, one of my standards, I don't get drunk, no matter what. It's a non-negotiable line of the sand. I don't care who shows up on what day. I'm not getting drunk.

Rachael Novak:

Right?

Mike Novak:

So it becomes a rule. Another rule, like going to bed at a certain time, right? Another rule, we don't miss workouts, right? So these like become non-negotiables with ourselves, right?

Rachael Novak:

100%. Well, and even in our marriage, right? Like we put rules into place in our marriage about how we treat each other. And if you're putting rules in and you have standards, then you're not going to break your own standards, hopefully, because then you're out of integrity with who you are as a person. So if a standard of ours is that we're not going to swear at each other, right? We're never going to say F you. I'm not going to call you nasty names, right? Like we're never going to threaten divorce, right? There's going to be certain things that are standards within our marriage that we uphold. And it's for the betterment of both of us. And it also, it incites trust between the two of us, because we as high integrity people, high achieving people, high passion people in a lot of areas, like we get fired up about stuff all day long. But if we have these standards in place, these rules that we follow, then we're going to maintain a relationship that we both care about, even in the heat of the moment.

Mike Novak:

So I think the guidance we give people is write out your standards and figure out where you have a gap between your actions and your commitments and visions, right? Like, what do you really want? But a lot of that starts with just waking up and being not happy with where you're at.

Rachael Novak:

Yeah, exactly.

Mike Novak:

I think back to when I was in Florida a few weeks ago, you're not the savage mastermind, a group of like 50 badass entrepreneurs. And every man in the room was asked to take a shirt off. Right. And the leader of the mastermind Garrett did this because you can't hide behind your body when your shirt is off as a man. Right. And so every dude took their shirt off and you saw a look of embarrassment across a lot of that room. Guys that had let themselves go. Guys that had lowered their personal standard with themselves. You know what I mean? It was like kind of a jaw-dropping moment for a lot of guys in there just saying like, shit, I've stepped outside of integrity with myself by letting my body get to this place.

Rachael Novak:

What an awakening.

Mike Novak:

That's exactly what it was. It triggered an awakening, right? We're going to all sit here with no shirts on for two hours. And those of you that feel like you're fat or like you're not proud of what you got, you're just going to sit there marinating that feeling for a few hours and think about it, right?

Rachael Novak:

That's powerful. I could never do that in a woman's mastermind.

Mike Novak:

That'd be a really weird mastermind. Yes. So, I mean, let's shift this a little bit. Like, let's talk about how you connect standards to winning at really, really high levels, right? Like how do, because if you look at every high achiever, they all have like amazingly high standards and they don't bend those standards for anyone, which is really, really cool. You know, like if you've read Relentless, Tim Grover would talk about Michael Jordan. Michael Jordan would tell him like, hey, I'm not coming down to your standard to his teammates. You're coming up to mine. And you better up your game. So how do people do that?

Rachael Novak:

I mean, that's kind of an all-compassing question. I think it's having the conviction and the confidence to know that your standards are going to yield results, right? And so it has to start with you. You have to be the one to, number one, have the awareness and then be okay with the fallout if there's going to be, which there always is going to be. And then it's maintaining that standard and watching as that standard. As you maintain that standard, you maintain the integrity of it. You maintain the actions through it with the vision, you're going to yield fruit, right? You're going to get results in whatever area. So if our personal standard is like, I'm not going to deviate from a clean diet for this X percentage of the week, right? If I'm going to eat 95% plus clean.

Mike Novak:

I'm never going to get fat.

Rachael Novak:

Right? That's my standard. And it's a standard because I like feeling good because I like fitting in my clothes well, because I like the way that I look and feel and I like that I can go any time of year and put on a swimsuit and be comfortable in it. So knowing that I have that standard in place and knowing now that I've seen the results from, maintaining the integrity of that standard, now, maybe not that exact example, but maybe other people in my life, I can hold to that standard and say, hey, if you're going to roll with me, if this is going to be it, then I expect you to hold your own standards and come up to my level on these things. Doesn't mean they have to do bodybuilding competition, but it's important to me that the people in my life look good and feel good and stay healthy. And that's an important thing. It doesn't have to look like mine. So I think seeing the fruit of it, knowing that, actually promotes results, now you have, you have a way to say to your friends, to your family, the people that you care about, these are the standards I'm going to uphold because I know it's going to result in fruit for you if you maintain it as well.

Mike Novak:

Right. I think the most important thing when it comes to this is realizing that your standards can't be in conflict to who you really are.

Rachael Novak:

Right.

Mike Novak:

If there's no authenticity there, that's a really big problem. And I see this with business leaders where they will ask a standard within their organization with which they don't personally uphold. And that's really, really problematic. Or like in the personal setting, like we've had experiences with other parents where they tell their kids to go do X, Y, Z, like eat this, train this way. And they're 60 pounds overweight, right? And so that is a really, really big problem. Like you're out of alignment with what you're asking other people to do. And so you're no longer the living, breathing example of the standard because really the leadership, the way that you lead standards is to become that example of them, right? You don't even have to talk about them. just look at me, look at what I do and watch my actions and you'll know what the fucking standard is, right? I don't even have to tell you, you're just going to see it. You're going to feel it.

Rachael Novak:

Well, I mean, on that point of parenthood, like we had a very hard conversation with our kids in the last couple of days because we have a standard with which we live and with which we operate and responsibilities and contribution around the house. And we were starting to see the kids slip a little on these standards, right? They're sliding downhill a little bit on these standards. so they weren't upholding them. So we had a little come to Jesus chat with all three of the kids, sat them down at the island, and had a very tough conversation about these are the standards, this is the expectation. And if we don't see that expectation being met, then the consequences have to happen. In a parent-child relationship, obviously, that's where we can instill consequences, right? Like that, like no screens, phones are being taken away, no computers, no TV, whatever, until these happen. Obviously, it's not going to be that dramatic in a work setting or whatever, but there are ways to say these are the standards, you are unable to hold the standards of simply fulfilling the commitments that you're making to yourself, then you're not somebody who's in alignment with the company culture.

Mike Novak:

Eric Hatch once said something, and it stuck in my mind for forever, and he said that a standard without a consequence is merely a suggestion.

Rachael Novak:

Totally.

Mike Novak:

Like, that just totally speaks to the situation. You know what I mean? Like, standards do have to have consequences. If this standard is not upheld, then you know what the ramification of that is. There has to be complete transparency to that with kids or with adults. You know what I mean?

Rachael Novak:

Agreed. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I think, you know, from your initial kind of question is, how do we develop? How do we maintain these standards? How do we start obsessing over improvement, right? What brings somebody to the place where they're like, how do you get crazy like us? where we're like, I'm completely obsessed with improving every area. I'm completely obsessed with getting a better body and being more healthy and making more money and helping more people and serving my team and getting other people around me even more wealthy. And I'm obsessed with having a great marriage or best friends and get to travel and do fun things. And I'm obsessed with keeping relationships with my kids forever, like as my people. How do you get to that point where everything becomes this obsession with improvement?

Mike Novak:

Well, I think the first thing is that's not crazy, right crazy is being the reverse of that and being stuck and and being asleep and and not being open to change and and growth perfect answer you know what i mean so i don't think we're crazy i think that people that stay stuck and that are okay with good being good enough those are the crazy people.

Rachael Novak:

Yeah offensive intended.

Mike Novak:

So let's talk about real quick.

Rachael Novak:

The dangers of complacency, right? Like these people who are deciding to stay stuck, because again, this is a decision, right? Staying good enough, accepting contentment, complacency. How is that a danger to different domains?

Mike Novak:

I think complacency is the biggest risk that everybody faces in every different area of their life. Complacency within your marriage with your partner, complacency with your children and taking them for granted, complacency with your business and not staying focused on it, complacency with your team members and not holding them to a standard. All of those things, complacency with yourself, you know, where you get fat and you're no longer in alignment with the standard you set for yourself, for your body. There's so many ways that, you know, that connects back into it, you know.

Rachael Novak:

Yeah, I mean, I think that it's the being able to assess constantly and say, am I accepting good enough? Am I accepting this as a status quo and I'm good here? Like, have I reached this level, right? What I see a lot of times, and we've talked a little bit about peaks and, you know, pits.

Mike Novak:

Pit to peak, yep.

Rachael Novak:

Yep. And so, you know, when somebody does reach a peak, that's when is the most dangerous time. Because if they just, if reach this peak and they reach this level of success, if they haven't learned or evolved as a person, if they haven't become obsessed with the improvement in all these areas to maintain that peak and then get over that peak into the next pit, that's when real sabotage can happen. Because people can fall right back down into the same habits, the same issues, the same complacency that they were before. And now they're stuck in a cycle of climbing the same peak over and over again, as opposed to, I want to be better. I want to be improved. I want more. I want more efficient. I want richer. I want all these things. Then when they reach that peak and they go, okay, I've got these things, but now I see what's also possible again and what more is even possible. So the next pit is simply going over that next peak, essentially, and saying, okay, this is now my new bottom. This is now my new base. Now what's next?

Mike Novak:

Yeah, your new base was the previous peak.

Rachael Novak:

Exactly.

Mike Novak:

Right? And that's the game of ascension and expansion.

Rachael Novak:

Exactly.

Mike Novak:

Yeah, I think that the person that's at risk of becoming complacent is that person at the top. It's not the person at the bottom. The person at the bottom is asleep.

Rachael Novak:

Yeah, exactly.

Mike Novak:

Right? So, they're already out. They're already stuck. And so, they have to come to an awakening or not, or they're just going to be staying there. It's the person at the peak that starts to take for granted what they've got. That's the person that's got a complacency risk.

Rachael Novak:

Yep. Agreed completely.

Mike Novak:

So, all right. Well, we kind of broke it down pretty in depth. Is there anything else you want to add?

Rachael Novak:

I don't think so. I mean, I think that, you know, when, when, if you have something like some fire inside you that is maybe just like a little bitty ashes, just a tiny little spark right now, but it's, it's saying it's, you can hear, you know, I meant for more. I can accomplish more. I can do more. And you don't really know exactly what that means or what that looks like yet. Like, that's when you have to go on an exploratory mission. That's when you have to really assess, am I where I want to be? Is my day to day making me feel good? is are my activities every night or on the weekends setting me up for success for the rest of the week like really have a hard look an objective look at your activities versus how they make you feel or how you show up then that's kind of the first step like we talked about being able to crawl out of this good enough complacent stage and say no no there's something else there's something else there i need to start getting obsessed with kind of this improvement in each area.

Mike Novak:

Yeah. And the last thing that I would just add is that if you raise the standard in all four domains, body being balanced business, there's a compound dynamic that people cannot comprehend until they've actually experienced it themselves, right? If you raise the standard in all reserves, not just one of them, that's where true transformation happens.

Rachael Novak:

100%.

Mike Novak:

So we'll leave it there and we'll see you guys next week.

Rachael Novak:

See you then.