88. Hi Gorgeous… Compliment or Threat? | Why Compliments Hit Different for Women

In this episode, we dive into a moment that sparked a bigger conversation than we expected: a stranger saying, “Hi Gorgeous,” and the mixed emotions that came with it.

Flattering? Maybe. Harmless? Not always.

We unpack how compliments can land completely differently depending on your lived experience, your gender, and your sense of safety in the world. Why do some men wish they got this kind of attention, while many women are simultaneously evaluating risk?

This is a real, unfiltered conversation about intention vs. impact, attraction vs. safety, and why context changes everything.

If you’ve ever wondered, “Was that a compliment… or something else?” — this one’s for you.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:12

This is the Clitoral Truth.

SPEAKER_01 0:16

The podcast where we sit around naked and talk about sex, dating, and relationships.

SPEAKER_00 0:25

We want to talk today about compliments and how we take them differently, kind of gender-specific, is what we found. Because this came up recently with in a group of friends that we have. Lexi, you want to talk about that?

SPEAKER_02 0:39

Yeah, we're talking about compliments from men to women versus women to men. And kind of got this idea from a story, uh a friend of ours, who I think was in a hospital. And passed a guy in a public place though. A public place. Big public place. Passed a guy, and she said that he looked her up and down and said something like, Hey, beautiful. Her reaction, she didn't know whether I mean, and I I think this is most women, don't know whether to feel flattered or threatened given the state of the world. It came up though, and then it was interesting to observe our other friends' reactions, and based on their gender, it was very binary.

SPEAKER_00 1:23

It was.

SPEAKER_02 1:23

It was very like there was some nuance though, because I was a little more so let's let's talk about the the reactions. Again, most of the women are like, well, yeah, that's flattering, but also kind of scary. Or could be, you know, the the word creep is always thrown around. We're gonna talk about that a little bit later. I have I have some opinions on it. And then the guys in the group, all of them that commented were like, I I wish that would happen to me, actually.

SPEAKER_00 1:53

And it's it comes down, it's kind of like the whole discussion that you hear recently around, would you rather face off with a bear or a man if you're a woman? It's kind of this, and it's a different perspective because yeah, men don't have the same danger.

SPEAKER_02 2:09

They don't have to worry about safety at all. And even you said, I'm not even afraid of other men, let alone women. And so it's like, wow, I I could not even wrap my mind around that privilege of not being afraid of anyone. And maybe you're afraid of the dark, maybe you're afraid of an animal, maybe you're afraid of the five.

SPEAKER_00 2:32

Well, yeah, I mean if yes. If you ask me the bear man thing, I'll take the man every time. That's not a good that that's I don't even need to think about that.

SPEAKER_02 2:40

I'm not saying you have no fears, but it's wild to me not to fear people. That that is wow, that is a privilege. Like it is that's incredible. The world would be completely different for me if that was the case. And I'm not even the most scared person around people. It is a thing that you have to consider if you're a woman. But I I couldn't even fatten that. I that the world would be completely different to Well it's a weird dynamic too, even when I think about it.

SPEAKER_00 3:12

I don't want to go off the subject too much, but we've talked about how I'm a people pleaser in recovery and in varying degrees of recovery. Sometimes I'm just a people pleaser.

SPEAKER_01 3:21

Right.

SPEAKER_00 3:21

But at the same time, I I've never been afraid of anybody. I've been afraid maybe of their reaction, and that's where the people pleaser thing comes from. But like in a confrontation, I always get the upper hand. Yeah. Just because there's no reason not to. I mean, it's just it's it never crosses my mind. It's like, if somebody's threatening me, it's just I've never experienced that, which is unfathomable. I get it.

SPEAKER_02 3:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:48

Well, I sort of get it.

SPEAKER_02 3:49

And there there's probably men out there who are afraid of other men in terms of a confrontation. Uh we're not talking about men fawning to other men socially because of they're afraid of rejection. I don't yeah, rejection of men or something. We're not talking about that. We're talking about more like physical like altercations, physical threats. There probably are men who are afraid of other men, but I think there's a great many out there who aren't either. I just can't fathom but the fact that they're not afraid of women at all physically, I I can't obviously because there's a whole gender I have to consider like Well, and there's there's something to this that is r relevant to this.

SPEAKER_00 4:37

Now I've never had a a confrontation that went badly for me. You know, I haven't had that many confrontations, but the s the turnaround, the other side of this is a lot of women have had bad situations with men's. So it's it's relevant in that way too. It's like, well, yeah, I just I never am at a disadvantage because I never have been at a disadvantage.

SPEAKER_02 4:58

And that's what I'm gonna get into for me. For me, I had a little bit of a different take on this, like, oh, I think I'd like that. Because I've never been assaulted, I've never been raped, I've never been abused, I've I've had wonderful experiences with men who take very good care of me. And so for me, not having that privilege, which is Yeah, that's a whole other privilege. A rare privilege to have as a woman, sadly, one in five, I believe, in the US have some kind of altercation like that with a man. One in three in the state of Utah where we're located.

SPEAKER_01 5:36

Right.

SPEAKER_02 5:36

And so I'm the exception, not the rule. I think even you said in all the women that you've dated or been with, two. I'm one of two.

SPEAKER_00 5:47

Yeah, you're one of two who have not had so even those statistics of the one in five and one in three probably aren't legit. That's just what's reported.

SPEAKER_02 5:54

Who's reporting shit? Right. Really. It's it's an awful you want to talk about an epidemic. Here we go. And so I have that privilege. Nothing that I've earned, just lucky. I have that privilege of being able to not feel as threatened as other women with a compliment that comes that way, especially given a public place like an airport, a hospital, right, a library. I understand receiving that compliment in different places is context. Receiving that compliment on the street in the open air, different than in a hospital. Completely different. But given the specifics of this story, I'd probably be like, that would be flattering. I'd love that. Right. That was how most of the guys are who've never had to think about safety. And I have to think about it, but I'm probably the most privileged out of at least the women to be able to be in that sliver of a population who would actually like that.

SPEAKER_01 6:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 6:55

Who would actually like being approached at the gym, who would actually like someone offering to buy them a drink at the bar. Like I'm in that sliver, and that is a privilege among women, but it's not nearly as privileged as just men in general.

SPEAKER_00 7:09

Well, and here's what's the other interesting part about that dynamic, is I was one of those guys who's like, man, I'd I'd love to have somebody, a woman say that to me. Also, because of this whole safety concern, women don't say that. So it's a self-perpetuating problem. Women won't say that because of what it could mean, what it could get them into.

SPEAKER_02 7:29

Right.

SPEAKER_00 7:30

What they unfairly will be accused of starting, you know, like how you shouldn't have said that to him. You know, what were you thinking shouldn't compliment him?

SPEAKER_02 7:38

Of course he's going to touch you.

SPEAKER_00 7:42

So it's like it cascades into a bigger problem.

SPEAKER_02 7:45

It's the safety and the violence problem that we have.

SPEAKER_00 7:48

Right. So women aren't gonna compliment me because I might be what we're gonna talk about, a creep. Yeah. And and it's like, oh, okay, now I've now I've really opened a wriggling can of worms.

SPEAKER_02 8:02

Yeah, you might be a bad guy, and there's too many bad guys out there, and that's why, and women we're trying to vibe check as well as we can, but obviously, we're wrong a lot of times. Like you it's not a hundred percent, oh, my vibe is I'm you know one hundred percent accurate. It's not. You are not gonna get those compliments, men are not gonna get those compliments from women, which is sad because it's a safety defense for women not to give those compliments. Right. Don't say anything, look confident, walk straight forward, walk like you're going somewhere, don't be buried in your phone. We have been told all the things to do to not get attacked, sadly, and it's not give you a compliment or even give you the time of day.

SPEAKER_00 8:48

Right.

SPEAKER_02 8:48

You know, it's to get where we're going as quickly as possible, yeah. W paying attention and possibly with our keys in our hand.

SPEAKER_00 8:57

Yeah, it's like well, I've been conscious of that, so I've no I've noted this before. If I'm walking down the street and there's a woman coming on the sidewalk ahead of me, we're gonna cry, we're gonna pass each other. They will rarely look at me.

SPEAKER_01 9:10

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_00 9:10

They will not make eye contact, they won't look at me at all, and I just know this is what it is. And so I've talked about this before. I give them extra space by not looking at them. I look across the street as we're approaching. Because if I'm bearing down on her and I'm looking at her, that's gonna make it even worse. So if I see a woman coming at me a block away, I start looking across the street, looking at the grass, looking at the trees. I look everywhere but at her. Yeah so she can come up, she can come past me. And you know what? Interestingly, there are some women who then say hi.

SPEAKER_02 9:44

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 9:45

Because it's like the defense is down. The defense is down. She she knows I'm not a threat because I haven't been threatening her for a block by by glaring at her or looking at her or noticing. Just and it might just be that I'm just noticing her. But it's like, oh, I know now that's an unsafe situation. Just passing me on the sidewalk is an unsafe situation.

SPEAKER_02 10:04

Sometimes she's trying to vibe check you. Right. Probably, without staring at you.

SPEAKER_00 10:08

Right.

SPEAKER_02 10:09

But you're kind of a formidable looking guy. No one would ever know that you are a gushy Enneagram 2 teddy bear. Like you are 6'1, broad-shouldered, stern face, actually.

SPEAKER_00 10:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 10:24

And and hard brow. So they don't know that who you are. They don't know you. I don't blame them for not for being scared.

SPEAKER_00 10:33

Acknowledging me. I don't blame them for being scared. Exactly. So it's like, very last minute. I so I do that, and very last minute I will acknowledge them as we're passing. Like in the last one second, I'll just look over and maybe nod or say hi or something like that. Just to make sure that that's that's kind of my last thing, and this is consciously that I do that. That's my last thing to just say, be friendly, just keep going, so that she doesn't then have to pass me and then keep turning around to see if I'm following her.

SPEAKER_02 11:02

Yeah. I do that.

SPEAKER_00 11:04

I it it's it's just you have to like and so and she probably still will because okay, he's made contact with me, so that might trigger some women, might not trigger you as much because again, of your history versus theirs. That might trigger her to turn around and see if I'm coming, but when she sees I'm still going, it's like, okay, uh, now I'm safe and I can go back to my own.

SPEAKER_02 11:26

I probably turn over and check my shoulder multiple times, two or three times, probably forty percent of the time when I pass a man. And nothing bad has happened to me with men.

SPEAKER_00 11:39

Right.

SPEAKER_02 11:39

And can you imagine if something has.

SPEAKER_00 11:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:42

If something had.

SPEAKER_00 11:44

You might even stop and and and turn around and make sure he keeps walking. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 11:49

But how often do men have to consider any of that? And so the ironic thing about this is that the men in the group were like, oh, I'd love a compliment like that.

SPEAKER_01 11:59

Right.

SPEAKER_02 11:59

They're never gonna get it, or rarely going to get it, because of the safety that men have, you know, the the unsafety or the violence that men have imposed on women. Men who are safe, it is worth, hey, speaking out, speaking up, being different than j and don't just sitting on the sidelines doing nothing and wishing you received that compliment.

SPEAKER_00 12:24

Right.

SPEAKER_02 12:25

You guys have a problem to fix.

SPEAKER_00 12:27

Yeah, we're the only ones who can fix it.

SPEAKER_02 12:30

Yeah, and it's gonna take the safe ones it's gonna take them.

SPEAKER_00 12:36

It's gonna take the safe ones to make it unsafe for men to to make it unsafe for women. I mean we have to speak up. We have to what I mean by that is we have to say when there are these little microaggressions or or comments made, we have to clearly state that's not fucking okay for you to do.

SPEAKER_02 12:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:55

In public. In front of everybody.

SPEAKER_02 12:58

You are a bad person.

SPEAKER_00 12:59

Yeah. We need to shame them because that's because that's a bad person.

SPEAKER_02 13:04

That is, and that's what shame is. It's it's uh you know, the difference between guilt and shame. Oh, you did something wrong, you made a mistake, versus you're a bad person. And so it is shame, and they should be ashamed.

SPEAKER_01 13:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 13:16

So I want to talk about the word creep because it gets thrown around a lot surrounding men when I believe they aren't necessarily creepy. This is this is one thing where I'm I'm kind of advocating a little bit. I'm a little bit more on men's side here.

SPEAKER_01 13:32

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 13:33

Um or or a little bit more nuanced at least.

SPEAKER_01 13:36

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 13:37

I think that everyone has a creep radar, and like I said, it's not always right. And sometimes we trust men who are creeps and we shouldn't, but we never really consider that sometimes we call men a creep and they're not the other way.

SPEAKER_01 13:52

Right.

SPEAKER_02 13:53

I think we're incorrect both ways, and sometimes the only attention is the one where, oh, I I thought I could trust him, I thought he was a good guy, and he's not. He's a total creep, you know. But we never go the other way and examine, like, you know, have we mist titled guys creeps when they haven't been because of our own exp based on our own experience, you know, their vibe check, but it's not a hard, fast rule or a universal truth. It's more based on their history and they've almost maybe overcorrected into thinking more guys are creeps than they are. I don't know, i it's completely subjective, obviously. If a girl is creeped out by a guy, she has every right to not associate with that guy. And I think everybody has a vibe check. But factually, he may not be a creeper have done anything that's like.

SPEAKER_00 14:49

It's a projection uh projection onto this guy based on the situation with an o uh an action somebody else has taken again.

SPEAKER_02 14:56

And again, the best thing to do is to monitor for yourself, you're free to do so, your your vibe check, and err on the side of I don't care if he's not, like he is giving me that vibe and I'm out, you know. Like that is the best thing to do. Obviously, err on the personal subjective side. Right. But I do think I do think that there's been some overcorrection and that some men who are perfectly safe have been called creep before or been labeled creepy.

SPEAKER_00 15:29

Well, and it's like because of men's behavior, that's that's the way it goes. And I mean we've had we talked about this in a previous episode, how when I was started exploring the King community and and activities and events and even education there, as a heterosexual man, I was the most under scrutiny. Yeah, of any of the groups that were represented in that community. It's like had to have a sponsor to go to something new, had to you know, that could vouch for me. That's when you I I found myself really being in that not all men category, and it had to be pointed out to me repeatedly. It's like that may be true, but some men are, and you're you fit the demographic, you match the demographic perfectly, so we're gonna be extra cautious with you. And it took a while to drill that into my head and get the privilege out of my head to say, Oh, okay, I see what you're saying now. I'll get it, I'll grab a sponsor for this.

SPEAKER_02 16:25

It's an unfortunate thing, but it's deserved because men have done it to themselves, and men there's there's a man problem here that they need to solve, and it's the violence toward women and the safety, and they have to solve that, and but because of that, there is probably some of this undeserved creep being thrown onto them. Do I feel terrible about it? No.

SPEAKER_00 16:49

No, but and and and it used to anger me a little bit because I did fall into that not all men thing, and it's and I believe I'm not all men, but but there are men that are out there, and so that's part of part of the gig of being a man. I gotta live with that now. I gotta live with other people's poor behavior, and not only that, it's a good thing because it forces me to really look at how do I come across, even if it's inadvertent and even if it's not creepy, I need to be aware of how I come across, and that's going back to that whole passing a woman on a sidewalk.

SPEAKER_02 17:26

You're not a not all men guy, because what they what they do is say, not all men and not all men, and sit there and do nothing. You're like, okay, well, that's not me, but what can I do to support women? What can I do to show them I'm safe? What can I do to call out guys who are dicks? What can I do? And so you're a proactive guy saying, Okay, well, I don't do that, I would never do that, but what can I do to change the way men as a whole are? The guys that say, not all men, sit back and do nothing. That's the difference.

SPEAKER_00 18:01

That's true. So that's what I did, and that's changed the way I walked down a sidewalk. Yep. I mean, I did a post this week about my global feminist shirt that I put out there, and it's because when I wear that outside, I get these looks. I get looks from men that are I swear I could read their mind. I get looks from some women that I swear I could read their mind. And I well, for whoever it is, I think I can kind of see what they're t what they're thinking. And I started that post with because I shot have a picture of me with a global feminist thing on my chest, and I say, hey, my eyes are up here. You're looking at the shirt, but that was the experience I get when I wear that shirt out there. Everybody's looking at the shirt, and I get the privilege there of looking at their expression. Yeah. And I can tell what they're thinking. Because they don't ever make eye contact with me when I'm wearing this shirt. Right. So I again, to your point, I made a post about that to say, here's the deal. And I haven't always been a guy who's a feminist. I had to have women point out my privilege.

SPEAKER_01 18:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:57

And gently grab me by the face and make me look at my privilege and say, oh, until I could see it. So it's it's okay. I'm still okay with the fact that I gotta go prove myself. Because it's the s it's a situation. I can't just, like you say, I can't be a not all-man guy and just sit there and be pissed in my armchair that I'm I'm being labeled as a creep. I need to assume I am one. Uh that people think I am one until proven otherwise, and then I need to speak out to other people who might be coming across, and they're not gay, they're not looking at their own privilege.

SPEAKER_02 19:31

Yeah. What I think is sad about the whole creep thing is that perfectly normal, safe men will do something like approach someone at the gym. They're automatically labeled a creep and they're they're not. Like objectively, this guy is is just a guy, you know, making conversation like you would at a bar or the gym or the library or the in IRL, you know, off of an app. Just you know, and so I don't I don't buy into that. I'm I call me old school. I still think that it's okay for people in general to approach other human beings in in general. Now, what he says or how he says it could be but just to approach someone, that's not an automatic creep for me.

SPEAKER_00 20:20

No, it's not. And but here I if you're a guy listening to this and you get a little bit discouraged if you approach somebody and you get that kind of defensive the defense posture thrown up against you, don't get discouraged. Take it as data. If and to your point you just made, if if you get somebody who kind of makes you feel like you're being a creep for doing that, right, then step back and say, Well, what did I do? How did I approach? What did I say?

SPEAKER_02 20:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:53

Take that as data and learn from it and adjust yourself next time. You know, so it's like I I'm I'm big into collecting data for things like this. It's how we build frameworks like the seven bridges.

SPEAKER_02 21:04

We can't help guys that are actually creeps on here and that are right.

SPEAKER_00 21:09

Well, and they won't get it and they won't adjust anyway. I mean, some of them might get it.

SPEAKER_02 21:13

Guys that would assault if you use it.

SPEAKER_00 21:14

If they're true sociopaths, they might take that data and and adjust and still it's a good thing. Yeah, we we can't for those guys. We can't. But but for the for the guys who are decent and upstanding and not creepy, if you get discouraged because you get a bad reaction, take it as data, look at what you did, talk to somebody, maybe a woman, about what you did, and just say, what did I do wrong there? Be open to changing.

SPEAKER_02 21:42

I suppose because that's the thing is that people can't give a compliment about physical if it's something that the eyes can see, if it's a physical attraction thing. Like, so he called her beautiful.

SPEAKER_01 21:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:54

And what I'm saying is that okay, do I think the The creep factor is probably like looking her up and down like she's a piece of meat, you know? Giving a physical descriptor compliment, like beautiful or gorgeous, or handsome, or whatever, it's like You look very nice today, or those are great shoes, or something like that. Oh, that's a little different than these descriptors, like overall descriptors of gorgeous, beautiful. I mean, if someone walked down the street and said to you, Hey, uh, those are nice shoes, versus, hey, handsome, those are two different you're having two different reactions to those compliments, guaranteed.

SPEAKER_00 22:34

Okay. So Absolutely. So what do you mean?

SPEAKER_02 22:36

Saying someone has a nice tie versus calling someone handsome, that's different.

SPEAKER_00 22:41

Well, I know, and I I So I'm I'm of the perspective that you don't call somebody handsome.

SPEAKER_02 22:46

I don't think either are creepy.

SPEAKER_00 22:48

Do you?

SPEAKER_02 22:49

I I mean I'm I don't know, do I? I because it it I just think it's sad that we can't tell someone they're beautiful. I mean I guess and then is there a difference between saying, You look really handsome today versus hi handsome? Is that different? Is it not?

SPEAKER_00 23:06

Like depends on who's receiving it. It's the way that we say it and it's also the way the person who's receiving it.

SPEAKER_02 23:14

Right, but I do think in general those beauty descriptors are like automatically forward or creepy. Am I I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 23:25

No, I think I agree with that. Well, you have to be extra careful with those because of the recipient. If they've had the if they've been assaulted, right, that's they're gonna go to that. If they haven't been assaulted, that probably works okay. So if if we were gonna coach that guy to do something different.

SPEAKER_02 23:43

Subjective.

SPEAKER_00 23:44

First of all, yeah, first of all, don't look her up and down. And first and second of all, find something else other than Hey Gorgeous. That's just a right, that's verbal violence, is what it is.

SPEAKER_02 23:56

For some.

SPEAKER_00 23:57

For somebody who's who's experienced that.

SPEAKER_02 23:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:00

It is, because that's probably what happened to them before they got abused. That was probably something they it might have been something they heard.

SPEAKER_02 24:07

I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 24:07

For somebody who's never been through that, yeah, it's not. So it's yeah, I think it is subjective. Yeah, it's since you don't know the the history of the subject, right? You gotta be extra careful. There's certain things you just can't say in public to people you don't know.

SPEAKER_02 24:22

Yeah, for me, if I were to pass someone and say something like look handsome versus call that person handsome. I agree. That then becomes like a pet word. Yeah. That then becomes a name that you're giving someone else as if you have some kind of ownership over the world.

SPEAKER_00 24:39

That's a great point.

SPEAKER_02 24:40

That is what can be creepy about that.

SPEAKER_00 24:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 24:43

So, and even I would feel that, I think.

SPEAKER_00 24:46

Right. You don't know. You don't assign pet names to somebody you don't know.

SPEAKER_02 24:50

I've gotten those kind of compliments.

SPEAKER_00 24:52

That's crossing a line.

SPEAKER_02 24:53

Knowing that that line is being crossed, but also knowing I'm completely safe where I am. So just getting the flattery out of it versus the threat.

SPEAKER_01 25:01

Right.

SPEAKER_02 25:02

You know? But I understand they've crossed a line, you know, into that pet name assigned as to me as if I'm their property or or they own me or have me or whatever, and they don't. So I I don't know, it kind of crosses that line into like, you know, spouses that call their spouse honey or I don't know what else they babe or baby.

SPEAKER_00 25:27

Well, and it's the same thing. We we've talked about this before where we experience that in dating, where that's what a lot of men will do that in their initial texting. Oh my god, don't they use the pet name.

SPEAKER_02 25:38

Stop. I hate pet so bad, it's crossing a line. Because you don't know anything about me, you don't know me, you've seen a photo. They use a pet name thinking it's gonna be flattering. It is just creepy because there is something that signifies ownership or property or some kind of hold on you that they've already got.

SPEAKER_00 26:04

It's it's trying to dominate.

SPEAKER_02 26:07

It's uh yeah, whatever it is, it it is because even if it's a woman toward a man and calling him handsome or babe or whatever, it's as if you're already hers.

SPEAKER_00 26:19

It's just not well it's a dominant it's a domination signal.

SPEAKER_02 26:23

It is descriptors and these pet names then. Right. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 26:27

So it's a domination signal. It's it's really animalistic. Dogs will do this. A dog who wants to dominate you will come up and put its paw on your leg while you're sitting there. That's a symbol of the dog is trying to dominate you. And if you let the dog do that, the dog will dominate you. The dog will be the alpha, the dog, you'll never be able to train that dog. You have to assert the dominance if you want to have it. You can do that, but you'll be walked all over and you're you'll be the you'll be owned by that dog for the rest of your life. It's the same, it's the same sort of thing. If a man does that, or anybody does that, man, woman, whatever, starts using those pet names, it's I I believe it's a symbol of or it's a dominance signal. And if you let that go, they're gonna continue to push that. And eventually they will own you. You know? So you've got to if if that's unacceptable, you gotta state that. It's like, hey, don't do that anymore. So for men who are doing that and you're listening to this, listen to that. Don't use those. It's not your place to use those. You don't have and and and why are you doing it?

SPEAKER_02 27:34

And please stop doing it on the apps.

SPEAKER_00 27:36

Right.

SPEAKER_02 27:37

Uh you gotta ask yourself, how successful are you, uh, you know, and like we do dating, relationship, sex coaching. This is a freebie for you. Stop doing that on the apps. Guaranteed your success is going to increase. In this podcast, we often use the terms women and men when discussing relationships and sexual dynamics. However, we want to acknowledge that not all women have vulvas and not all vulva owners identify as women. Similarly, not all men have penises, and not all penis owners identify as men. Our podcast welcomes individuals and couples of all orientations and identities. We aim for inclusivity, but fully acknowledge that our attempts will never be perfect. We are learning and adopting new language as humankind and our world evolve.

SPEAKER_00 28:34

Hey, just a heads up. We're not therapists or doctors, but we do coach people on sex, dating, and relationships based on our own experiences, research, and the wild stories we've heard and lived along the way. What we share is for your inspiration and education, but it's not a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice. If you're facing a serious issue, please take out the right kind of support. In the meantime, keep listening, stay curious, and let's keep the conversations going.