Elite Business Connector Podcast
If you're in the people business then this podcast is for you. Learn how to develop and master business social skills. This podcast has both content-driven and interview-driven episodes to keep the podcast creative. High energy, fast-paced, and practical.
Elite Business Connector Podcast
Top Ten Questions Asked About the 1st 5 Minutes - 033
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Bryan Buckley answers the most common — and most skeptical — questions he gets about the 1st 5 Minutes Framework, straight from keynote audiences, DMs, and corporate workshops. From introverts to 15-year sales veterans, this episode tackles the real doubts people have about whether intentional connection actually works. Whether you're brand new to the framework or already using it, you'll walk away with sharper clarity and immediate action steps.
Timestamps
00:00 – Why the First Five Minutes Matter
01:36 – The Framework and How It Works
03:47 – Why Five Minutes Beats First Impressions
05:28 – Introverts Can Win at Connection
08:04 – Using the Framework on Zoom or Phone
10:14 – Connection Prep vs. Company Research
13:08 – Names Build Trust Faster Than Faces
16:00 – Free Cheat Sheet and Quick Break
17:25 – Questions Without Sounding Like an Interrogator
20:31 – Locked-In Listening, Not Loading
24:37 – Three Signs Your Connection Is Working
26:52 – Why Veterans Still Need Structure
29:28 – The Science Behind Trust and Influence
32:24 – Leaders Use It Beyond Sales
34:14 – Teaching the Framework to Your Team
36:39 – Action Steps and Final Challenge
Featured Kits & Resources Mentioned
- 1st 5 Minutes Cheat Sheet — A free printable summary of all ten Q&A's with action items; perfect to keep handy before high-stakes meetings. Download it here.
- The 1st 5 Minutes: How to Leverage the Most Important Minutes to Build Connection, Trust, and Influence eBook — A free digital guide on how to train your sales team to connect quickly and confidently; available in the show notes. Get your copy here.
- Episode 015 — Deep-dive episode on how to get better with names (referenced for Q5).
Resources to Use:
The System Elite Connectors Use to Remember Names
If you’re serious about improving your business communication skills, I created a step-by-step system you can download right now — absolutely free.
👉 Grab it here:
30 Connection Questions for Stronger Business Conversations
This is a proven question set to improve every conversation in the 1st 5 minutes.
👉 Grab it here:
Buy the 1st 5 Minutes Book:
Follow Me on Social Media:
Why The First Five Minutes Matter
SPEAKER_00Now, I hear very specific questions on a consistent basis about the first five minutes. Some are curious questions and others are skeptical questions. Today, I'm answering the questions that you've been asking. The ones that I get after a keynote, after a workshop, ones that show up in my DMs. Now, you get the benefit of hearing what others are asking. They may be questions that you have yourself, or maybe once you hear the question, you realize you'd like to hear that answer as well. Ten questions, real answers, let's go. Welcome to the Elite Business Connector Podcast, where we believe how you interact with people will make or break your opportunity to develop a real and influential connection. Now, whether you're a rookie or a rock star with people, you're at the right place right now. Let's do it. I'm your host, Brian Buckley, husband of one, father of five, and on a mission to help you develop, deepen, and master your business communication skills. Now, my promise to you is if you listen and subscribe, I'm going to bring my best content and energy every single week to help you get better at communicating and connecting in a business environment. If you're in sales, if you're in leadership, customer service or hospitality, or really any business where relationships matter, and let's be honest, what business isn't, you're in the right place.
The Framework And How It Works
SPEAKER_00Here's the big idea for today's episode. There are questions that need answers about the validity of the first five minutes. And today's episode is something I've been wanting to do for a long time because I've been answering these questions a la carte. We're calling it the top 10 questions asked about the first five minutes. These are real questions from skeptics to veterans, from introverts to managers, from people who've never heard of the framework, and from people who've been using it to become elite business connectors. And just wanted some more clarity. So here's the format. We've got 10 questions total: five before the break, five after the break, plus two bonus questions at the end that I think every leader in this audience needs to hear. No fluff, no filler, let's get into the weeds. Now here's a quick preface. Before we get into the specific questions, here's the foundation you need because every answer I'm about to give you flows from this one idea. The first five minutes, it's not a sales trick. It's not a hack. It's not small talk with a strategy attached. It's a structured, repeatable framework for building trust before business. And it works because human beings are wired to decide about you before you even say anything meaningful. And then the next minute is critically important. And the question isn't whether the first five minutes matters. The question is, are you intentional with it? Or are you leaving it to chance? So here's a quick review of the framework to create the context for the 10 questions. First is the pregame, what I call the five before the five. What you do before the conversation begins is also called pre-read the room. Then there's the first minute, think personal. That's the social layer. You're building a human connection before a professional one. Then there's the middle three minutes, think professional, the all-in framework, which is ask, listen, and learn. And then there's the last minute, minute number five, think problem. You go deep by identifying the real problem, then transitioning, here's the keyword, smoothly, into your solution. That's the architecture. Now let's answer your questions.
Why Five Minutes Beats First Impressions
SPEAKER_00So the first initial question I'm asked often because it's about the length of time. Why five minutes? Why not the first impression? Why not the first 30 seconds or the whole conversation? Well, it's good, it's a fair question. And it gets right to the heart of why this framework exists. The reality is, everyone has the first five minutes of a business conversation, no matter if you're the CEO, working behind the counter, or in frontline sales. Five minutes is also very attainable, and it's a focused, finite window where connection is still possible before business takes over. It's long enough to establish trust, but it's also short enough to be trainable. Now, the analogy that I use is an hourglass versus a stopwatch. A stopwatch asks you how fast it went. An hourglass asks what you did with the time that you're given. You need this amount of time to work the framework to stop impressing and start connecting. And here's the payoff. If you can connect in the first five minutes, the next 25 or 55 minutes gets dramatically easier. You've earned early trust and early influence. If you're in a conversation, hospitality or customer service, you may only get one minute or two minutes, which makes those minutes even more important to make a critical connection. The pitch doesn't feel like a pitch anymore because you're already on the same side of the table relationally. Five minutes is also an attainable window of time to focus on the other person to begin the one-word goal of the first five minutes, which is, do you know it, connection.
Introverts Can Win At Connection
SPEAKER_00Question number two Can introverts really do this? Or isn't this just for naturally outgoing people? I get this question a lot. And let me be very direct. This framework was not built for extroverts, it was built for anyone who wants to be intentional. And here's what most people get wrong about connection. They think it requires energy, volume, a big personality. It doesn't. The first five minutes is built on observation, preparation, structure. And those are introvert superpowers. And the biggest one for them is OQ, observational intelligence. It's one of the most power powerful tools in this framework. You walk into a room, you read your environment, you identify your LTP, your lead talking point, that one detail you're going to open up with for the conversation. But that's not a performance. That's intentional noticing. And here's the key introverts often make the best connectors because they actually listen. They're not performing. They're present. And presence is the currency of connection. Introverts are also some of the best question askers because they're inquisitive. They think, they process, and they ask creative and curious questions. I love talking to an introvert who has the skill of asking questions and then leverages their listening. Then there's extroverts. Well, they talk, then they talk, then they breathe so they can talk again. Sound familiar? Am I getting personal with some of you? Introverts are also very good planners. So they leverage doing the pre-read the room to find the connection points that help them with their nerves meeting someone for the first time. They know exactly what they could say, especially if they know it's going to increase the chances of connecting very soon in the conversation. Now, many extroverts have learned to harness their quote, people energy and to become good question askers and locked in learning with their listening. And I'm the poster child and lead case study that it can happen. So be encouraged and empowered introverts. There's not just hope. You can own this space and are now officially enabled. The first five minutes doesn't require you to be someone that you're not. It gives you a structure that works with your natural wiring, not against it. Here's a key distinction: connection is not about personality, it's about intention and structure. Introverts thrive here. Go introverts.
Using The Framework On Zoom Or Phone
SPEAKER_00Question number three: Is the framework different for in-person versus virtual versus phone conversations? Honest answer, state the obvious. In-person is ideal. That's the full experience. Physical environment, body language, energy in the room, all the observation data that you can gather by being in-person. But virtual, actually, many of those same principles apply. They just require what I call more intentionality. Let's say, for example, on a Zoom call, your OQ shifts, observational intelligence. You're reading the background. What's on the bookshelf? What's the lighting telling you about where they are? Did they join with video on? Are they distracted? Are they present? And all the more need for pre-read the room, remember that's take the five before the five to find the five, connection, not data points, to start that virtual conversation with a strong LTP. A phone call, well, it's the most challenging, but it's still possible, needing to heighten your prep when possible, and especially your listening skills, because you can't visually see them as you would virtual or in person. And the first minute still exists. You still have a minute to connect personally before you go too professional. The 2 QM, two question minimum, still applies. Locked-in listening still applies. In fact, on video calls, locked in listening matters more because the person can literally see if they're checking your notes or your phone. But all the more the challenge, if you're on your phone with them and they can't see those distractions, you can sense it oftentimes if you're on a phone call, if you're connecting or not, if they're there, but not really there. The framework is modality agnostic. The tools are the same. The environment just changes the inputs, not the architecture. So the virtual adjustment. In person equals full OQ environment. Virtual equals reading the digital space, background, camera, presence, functionality, same structure, different data points, and all the more of leveraging your first five minutes and when you're on that phone call, of really locking in, really listening for things that you obviously visually cannot see. Here's
Connection Prep Versus Company Research
SPEAKER_00question number four. Does it really make a difference if I take any time to prepare? I already researched the company and the person, why do I have to do anymore? Well, love that you're already researching. That's step one. But here's the gap most people don't know they have. Researching the company, and the person is a professional prep. What the first five minutes requires is the connection prep. And those two are vitally different, both important, both in different ways. The five before the five isn't about knowing their revenue or their title. It's about finding five connection points before you walk in. What are some commonalities? What's going to light them up when you make that comment and then ask a question? Acknowledge and ask. What you notice on their LinkedIn profile that was personal, not just professional, what's something they posted that you could authentically reference? From those five, you identify your LTP, your lead talking point. That's that one connection bridge you're going to use to open the personal minute. Not the pitch, not the agenda, the human opener. The difference between professional research and connection prep is the difference between knowing about someone and being ready to connect with someone. Now both matter, but most people only do one, and some do that even lousy. I just had this experience last week. I met with a sales director and looked for connection points on her LinkedIn profile. What I found was a post with her superiors celebrating a big promotion for her. It was fresh, smiling, it was recent. And guess what my LTP, my lead talking point was? Did it work? It honestly couldn't have gone better. Here's what I did. I acknowledged the promotion, celebrated with mad kudos, made a moment of it. Then I asked, Acknowledge and ask. I asked if it was what she expected. How's it going in those first three months? Guess what happened? Instant rapport. She lit up, and there was a connection spark in that very first minute. Read the room, had the leap talking point, that came into the big begin the banter. And then after that, that's when we got to the names. That's the order of the first minute. Now, what would have happened if I hadn't prepared? And if I had prepared and it was just data points and not connection points, would this have happened? Honest answer? Not a chance. It was all about preparing to connect. Did you catch that? Preparing to connect in the first minute of the first five minutes. But here's the gap. Again, most pros research the company. If you identify five connection points, or at least one, and build their LTP. And that's the gap where deals are won or lost in the first minute.
Names Build Trust Faster Than Faces
SPEAKER_00Here's the fifth question. I'm bad with faces, but good with names. Isn't that good enough? No. Nope. Not a not even close. And I say that with all due disrespect and complete love. You know what it signals to the other person when you say you're bad with names and you're not even going to try. And their name is not worth an effort to even learn. To be blunt, honestly, it's a cop-out. And you're better than that if you're a business professional and definitely if you're aiming to become an elite business connector. And for the unedited record, that used to be me. I blamed a memory issue. You know what it was? It was actually a focus issue. I would come in and I would be noticing the name of come out, I'd be introduced, they would say their name, and I'm focusing it on with their look, their energy, their heights, everything about what they're wearing, what they're carrying, everything except their name. Being good for faces may seem like a gift, but a face doesn't tell someone that you see them. Did you catch that? You're seeing their face, but not really seeing them, and their name does. I use the analogy all the time. Everyone has a hello, my name is sticker on them that you don't are not aware of, but it is there and it matters to them. Do you know how I know that? It matters to you when they get your name wrong, when they forget your name, when they don't try, or the extreme when all of a sudden somebody really tries hard to nail your name, huge difference. There's some research with Dale Carnegie, it was decades ago, but it still holds true. And it's the science that backs it up. He says this: I love this quote. A person's name is, to them, the sweetest and most important sound in any language. Using someone's name in conversation, it activates a different neurological response than hearing any other word. It signals you matter. I remembered, you're not just a face in the crowd. In a sales or service context, forgetting a name is, well, it's a trust with withdrawal. You made a deposit by showing up prepared, hopefully, and energetic, possibly, and you immediately spent it by saying, hey man, instead of, hey, Marcus. The good news is names are a learnable skill. And I spent an entire episode called Why Good with Faces and Bad with Names Doesn't Work and How to Fix It in episode 15. So the CTA on this one is to go back, download the episode, and get your name calling on. Do you know how I know this is such a big issue? It's one of the top three episodes that are downloaded and addressed on the Elite Business Connector podcast. So be encouraged. You can change. And this specific question may be your biggest takeaway to begin working to improve this hole in your game. All right.
Free Cheat Sheet And Quick Break
SPEAKER_00We're at the halfway point, and I'm gonna take 60 seconds before we get into the second five questions. If you're listening and you're thinking, I want to actually use this, not just curious. Well, I've got a resource for you built specifically for you. It's called the first five minutes cheating. And it's a summary of all 10 questions plus the action. It's the kind of thing you stick. You print, you put it in your notebook, or you keep it on your desk before. Application. And the best part, it's absolutely free. You just go to show notes and get your copy. And here's the big chip. High performers take full advantages of resources like this one. Come for the quality of their content. Everything is in their team. And they really care about those people. That's what makes them elite and separates them. So I encourage you, if you've not gotten into the habit of doing these cheat sheet resources, take a moment, put it on pause, I'll be here. Go download the resource. Easy for me to say, right? Come right back and we'll get to it. All right, break's over. Now let's get back to it. I'm gonna give you five more questions, asked about the first five minutes. And then remember, we're gonna close with two leadership bonus questions. And of course, I'm gonna give those a no additional charge. So hang in there, leaders. I got you. Question
Questions Without Sounding Like An Interrogation
SPEAKER_00number six. Won't someone feel interrogated if I ask too many questions? Here's my response. Only if you're asking the wrong questions or asking them in the wrong way. Do you catch that? Only if you're asking the wrong type of questions, but specifically if you're asking them in the wrong way. So here's the distinction: Interrogation is rapid fire. It's surface level and it's very transactional. The ask of the questions is collecting data, not necessarily building a connection. The person on the other side ends up feeling like they're filling out a form. It also makes them feel like they're interrogatoring and they're out to get you, catch you, make you feel uncomfortable. They care more about control than connection. Connection questioning, well, it's just different. It's curious, it's not clinical. It goes deeper instead of wider. And that's the whole point of what I call the double click question. That's my term for the technique that fulfills the two question minimum. So instead of asking five different questions, for example, across five different topics, you ask one, then you double click, and you go deeper on the same thread. Single click, as on the service level, double click, well, it's opening up that folder and going a little bit deeper. And when you choose to double click, you're saying what you just told me matters enough to hear more. That's far from interrogation. And that's one of the most powerful signals of respect that you can give another human being in a business conversation. And here's the biggest way to make sure you're not interrogating. One word. Tone. It's how you ask the question. It's the follow-up of a curious question. It's your facial expression that says, tell me more, not I got you now. Nobody feels interrogated by someone who genuinely feels curious about them. What do they feel? They feel seen. Tone is everything. How you ask the questions is everything. And by the way, 99% of people could not be further from being interrogators. Why? They barely ask a single good question, let alone too many questions. This means you're so far from being a question interrogator, so go for it. There's a ton of room there. Do you know why? Most people ask one question during the first five minutes. I research all the time. And it's usually a reactive question. I ask something about you, and then you respond back, well, how about you? Your interrogation concern is literally the exact opposite. And your ability to connect in the first five minutes will dramatically change to the positive. So the tool, the double-click question, single-click, service answer, double-click, opening the folder. So go deeper on the same thread instead of jumping to a new topic. And that's what fulfills the 2QM. This may be your takeaway, is that you start becoming aware of even asking questions in the conversation.
Locked In Listening Not Loading
SPEAKER_00Question number seven. How do I stop thinking about what I'm going to say next and actually listen? I like this question because it's honest and it's a little vulnerable. And this might be the most important question in this entire episode because this is where most conversations go to die. Not from a lack of knowledge, but from a lack of presence. You're there, but you're not there. There are three B skills of becoming an elite business connector: aware, real, and engaged. Be aware what's going on in the conversation. I need to be aware. I need to be real. I need to be vulnerable. But also I need to be engaged. And that's where the presence comes in. And I don't mean just physically there, but mentally there as well. So here's what's happening neurologically. Your brain processes language about 400 words per minute. Most people speak about 150 to 175 words per minute. From Chicago, well, we talk fast, we eat fast, and we drive fast. So maybe more there. But that gap, let's say it's just 200 words, surplus, is where your internal monologue lives. And it sounds like this. Well, what do I say next? Did I just say the right thing? Are they impressed with me? Should I mention the proposal, or is it too soon? What are we doing here? We're loading, not listening. Did you catch that? We're loading, not listening. We learn that back with Every Conversation Counts by Ries McGee. Great book, but I love that. That phrase. We're loading, not listening. I'm so guilty of that. Our brain is thinking about and loading what we're going to say next. And we're not, what we're what are we not doing? We're not listening. You know what I've been given a challenge on? Is listening patiently. I'm trying to lock in listen. I want to unlock them by my questions. I want to lock in listening with being patient, and then I want to lock down what I learned. The answer isn't to quite your brain, it's to redirect it. And I call that locked-in listening. And it's active, not passive, of a skill you can develop. And you commit to two things. First, you'll not speak until you have processed the last thing that they said. Second, your next question will come from their last answer, not from your prepared list. I interviewed Dr. Brenda Buckley Hughes. Notice the Buckley in there. That's my older sister. If that listened to that interview, I highly recommend you go back to that. But she talks about the pause and the pace and the pitch. That pitch is going to be your tone. That pause is making sure in your conversation, and I can do so much better at that. I just let it breathe, let somebody's finish their train of thought. You know what happens? If I just pause for what feels like 20 seconds, and it's like three, they know that I'm listening, but they also may not be done with what they're going to say. Or they look at me and give me permission to be able to encourage me to go on in the conversation. Huge skill. Pitch, pace. And what's the third one? I don't remember. Anyway, go back and listen. Actually, I do. I want to encourage you to go back and listen to the episode on that interview. So you should be encouraged from a guy who has ADD, attention, distraction, disorder. I have to fight to pay attention and not focus on what I'm going to say next. And this is why locked-in listening is just so critical for me. And hopefully it is for you. Listening and not loading takes two actions. First, when it's awareness, you need to notice what when you're doing this, i.e., catching yourself in the scene of the crime. Two, action, you got to change your behavior once you become aware of it. Which means to me, I got to stop loading. I got to begin listening and hopefully patiently. And the irony: the less you focus on what you're going to say next, the more impressive you become as a conversationalist. The next question comes from their next answer, not your prepared list. This one rule can transform how you prepare and you experience somebody else in a conversation. Question
Three Signs Your Connection Is Working
SPEAKER_00number eight. How do I know if my first five minutes is actually working? That's a really good question. Well, there's actually three signals, and they're not complicated. The first signal is they keep talking. When your first five minutes are working, the other person isn't looking for a way out. They're engaged and they're going deeper, hopefully, and they're offering information you didn't even ask for. That's a trust indicator. People don't overshare with people they haven't connected with. The second signal is once their energy shifts, there's a moment in an effective first five minutes where the conversation stops feeling well like a business trans interaction. It starts feeling like two people who are generally glad they're talking. You'll feel it before you can name it. So watch for it. And the third signal is they ask about you. And this is that reciprocity loop. When the framework is working, they naturally want to know your story. They stop being the subject and start being the participant. And that's the all about us phase activating, the third phase of the connection arc. You use your OQ and noticing their engagement. And when you use one of the five connection points from pre-read of the room, for example, they'll be more engaged in the conversation because you're not only getting them talking about themselves, it's something that they really want to talk about. You're creating that environment and you'll notice it by what? OQ. So it's the long-term signal. Well, if you're in sales, your pipeline starts to change. You start getting more callbacks, more referrals, more, I feel like you really got us in that post-meeting follow-up. And that's the compound interest of a strong first five minutes. But where does that start? It starts by look at you, not look at me. It's making sure we're not in this small talk triangle, where in one of those corners it's all about sizing up the other person, where it feels like one upping, or maybe just keep it upping. And we need to make sure we're cognizant of that. But the more I can make it about them, the more those signals come into play. They keep talking and overshare. The energy shifts from transactional to interaction to connection. They start asking about you. All three, that shows your first five minutes is working.
Why Veterans Still Need Structure
SPEAKER_00Question number nine. I've been in sales for like 15 or more years, and I do just fine. Why do I even need this? Well, first, respect. 15 plus years is real. You've built something, you have some instincts that can't be taught in a workshop. I'm not here to tell you that everything you're doing is wrong. But here's the honest question back. What does I'm just fine cost you? And is fine good enough? Maybe it is. But could there be more room for professional growth? Fine may mean that though you're closing deals. But are you losing deals you don't even know you've lost because there's no connection? Are the rooms you walk into where the energy never shifted and you chalked it up as well, it's just a bad fit? Are the relationships that stayed transactional when they could have gone deeper into interaction? I found what I call the trap of the experienced. And this becomes uncomfortable when people are set in their ways. They rest on the already developed skills and often lose any desire or even any need to continually improve. And that's the difference between the experienced and then the rock star. The next level up is one that is at a completely different level. And how do you get there? Seeing the need and being willing to grow and improve in areas that will give you an advantage like the first five minutes framework. And the first five minutes gives your instincts a language. It names what the best connectors are already doing very naturally. So it can be taught and it can be trained and it can be transferred. The pros who get the most out of this framework aren't beginners. They are the 15, 20-year veterans who suddenly understand how they close and what they close and how to do it on purpose every single time. And for the veteran, instinct without structure is just inconsistent. The first five minutes names what great connectors are already doing. So it can be something that you can learn. For somebody who's new, I encourage you to learn from those that are older. Sometimes the season, they have to get motivated. And it may be, dude, if you don't get your pipeline filled, if you don't stop being transactional in a hotel setting or in customer service or whatever the situation is, something's got to change. But I'm looking for the one who is seasoned who goes, you know what? There's another gear. It's also a little bit of humility. Can I be taught something different? Will I be willing to be taught something different? And can I be humble enough to receive it and get better at it? That's my guy. That's my girl. Question
The Science Behind Trust And Influence
SPEAKER_0010. Is there any research or science behind this? Or is this all just your opinion, Mr. Brian Buckley? I love this question because it's the right question. Don't take anyone's framework on faith, including mine. Ask for the receipts. Here are a few of mine. Albert Merabine's communication research showed that 55% of emotional connection and communication is delivered through body language, 38% through tone, and only 7%, according to him, through the actual words. Now that's not a license to say nothing, but it is a mandate to be intentional about how you show up before you say a word. It's about your listening skills as well. What are you learning? Carol Deweck's growth mindsight research supports the foundation of this work. Connection is a learnable skill, not a fixed trait. And too many people, I see it as a fixed trait because they're not willing to learn, willing to get better, willing to be humble and hungry. And Kaman's and Tversky's loss aversion principle says this the findings that pain is twice as motivating as gain is woven directly in how the last minute of the framework is designed, which is the think problem, helping them figure out what it is. Honing in on that, bringing out that problem that people don't want that risk, helping to define that. And we show you how to do that in the book. Current books like Super Communicators, episode 27, Why We Click, Every Conversation Counts, episode 31, the book called Resonate, Click, episode 18, Ask More, are all books that overlay and validate the first five minutes framework. Now, these are Pulledzer Prize winners, New York Times and Wall Street bestsellers, Harvard and Stanford professors. And guess what they all do? They confirm the first five minutes framework. So the first five minutes framework is not my opinion. It's a framework built on behavioral science. It's applied to the real world and tested by thousands of conversations and verified in corporate workshops. The science is the foundation. The framework is the application. That's why it's so important. And that's why, if you've noticed on these odd-numbered episodes, some are just my content. But some of those are what I call book breakdowns. And we go through different books that highlight the specific science and the research to validate for you that this framework works. And this should encourage you that this research is done for you. And my efforts of curating from the best is done for you. And your part, one word, implementation. Not just to know, but to do. And to quote my late father, son, to know and not to do is not to really know. Great words, Dad. So here are buy 10 get two free bonus questions.
Leaders Use It Beyond Sales
SPEAKER_00I told you there are two bonus questions, but they're specifically for leaders in the room, the managers, the directors, the VPs, and if that's you, lean in. Here's that first bonus question. Is the first five minutes just for frontline sales and service professionals, or does it apply to leadership too? Every single leader I've ever trained has told me some version of the same thing. I wish I had learned this earlier. Not just for selling or hospitality, but for leading. Here's the truth. The first five minutes applies anywhere trust needs to be built before anything can also happen. That's just a sales. That's not just behind the counter. That's every one-on-one with every direct report, every performance review, every new client onboarding, every cross-functional team meeting where you are in the room and need to be present. Leadership is connection at scale. The leaders who build the most powerful, the most loyal teams, who retain their best people, who walk into a room and immediately command trust, they're doing the first five minutes, whether they or you realize it or not. We're just naming it and making it repeatable. If you lead people, this framework is not optional. It is fundamental to how you show up, how your team experiences you, and how quickly new relationships reach depth. What's the validation? Well, I've interviewed leadership coaches and experts, episode 26 and episode 30. And I've interviewed a VP of ATT, episode 28. Listen for yourself. Buy in from other experts in leadership and see if it matters. So for leaders, the first five minutes applies to any context where trust must be built before business can happen. And that leaderships every single day. Second
Teaching The Framework To Your Team
SPEAKER_00leadership question and last question for the episode. How do I teach the first five minutes to my sales team? And where do I even start as a leader? This is where it gets exciting. Because you're not just asking how to use this, you're asking how to multiply it. And that's a leader question. Mad kudos. Here's where to start. Model it first. Before you train your team on the first five minutes, begin to do it yourself visibly and intentionally in your next team meeting, in your next one-on-one, in the next client conversation you're in together. Let me give you a quick example. Meet with a guy that I know, and he wants to bring this into his team. But I encouraged him to do this. And he took it on himself. He's listened to the book on Audible, driving to customer meetings. He's listening to the podcast. And now he's able to model that. You know what that's going to do? When I come in to do a workshop, it's going to dramatically change because they have seen it in their leader. Let them see what it looks like when a leader is genuinely curious instead of just closing, just getting on to the next thing, just about the numbers. Then name it. When you debrief after a sales call or a client meeting or a customer interaction, use the language. Well, what was your LTP? Did you get to the double click? How's your OQ? How'd the last minute land? Vocabulary is accountability. You can't coach what you can't name. And from there, the framework is scalable. I work with organizations to build it into their onboarding, into right-along protocols, into call reviews about the framework. And that's where the real ROI shows up. Not on a one-to-one rep who's good at it, but an entire team, an entire floor, an entire region that is a shared language for what a great connection looks like. Now, here's some real value and next steps. Not talk about this yet on the podcast. I actually have a free digital resource called The First Five Minutes for Sales Leaders: How to Train Your Sales Teams to Connect Quickly and Confidently. And you can find this ebook in the show notes. And maybe this, if you're a leadership, is your biggest takeaway from this episode. If you want to explore what bringing me in could look like to your team or your company or your association, reach out to me on LinkedIn or at Brian BuckleySpeaks.com. Remember, that's Brian with the Y. That's what I do. Love to encourage you, love to help you. And let's explore what that can look like.
Action Steps And Final Challenges
SPEAKER_00Let's wrap this up. We've gone through a lot of content here today, and I want to make sure that you are fully aware of where we're heading this. We said 10 questions, two bonuses, and here's what I hope to leave you with. The first five minutes isn't not just about being talkative or about being fake with your warmth or running a script on people. It's about being intentional for five minutes so that everything follows has a foundation. You don't connect by impressing. You connect by seeing. And when someone feels seen, when they walk away from a conversation thinking, that person actually listened to me. Everything changes. The trust changes, the deal changes, the relationship changes. You've got five minutes. Use them. Here's some closing action items. Number one, find just two questions out of the 10 that you need to work on. Pace yourself and then do the professional development to grow. Second is really wrestle with one of those questions. Find a question that challenges your thinking and really work on it. And third, grab the worksheet, that cheat sheet there. Head to the show notes and download the first five minutes cheat sheet. Print it, keep it, use it before your next high-stakes conversation. And it'll help you too on number one and number two of finding your two questions that you need to work on and one you need to drill down on. If you're in leadership, maybe your action item is to go back and pick up the ebook that's written just for you. This episode is officially in the books, in and out, and thankfully nobody got hurt. So don't forget to follow and subscribe to the show wherever you get your podcast so you don't miss an episode. For those of you that travel a lot, maybe to go see a customer and get a long commute, I encourage you to download past episodes so you can listen to them anytime and not miss any episodes. They're right there handy. Check out the audible version of the first five minutes book. If you're watching on YouTube, don't forget to subscribe, leave a comment, let us know what resonates with you. Well, if today's episode hit home, do me a favor, share with one person in your world who needs to hear it. Colleague, teammate, someone on your sales floor or hospitality team. Stuff works, but only if people know about it. And lastly, as I mentioned earlier, if you'd like to bring me in to your team, to your conference, to your next company events, reach out. I'd love to have that conversation. Find me on LinkedIn or Brian at Brian BuckleySpeaks.com. So that's it. And you know how we close. As my Chicago Bears chant, good, better, best, never let it rest till your good gets better and your better gets best. Now, until next time, keep improving your communication, conversation, and connection skills every single day. As my dad always used to say, thanks for coming. But most of all, thanks for leaving. I'm out. You got this now. Now is your time to do something with this episode. And always remember to leverage your first five minutes to build connection, trust, and influence. You got this now.
