People Think We Can't Think For Ourselves: Phillip's Story

In this episode, we sit down with a group of our talented student artists as they share their thoughts on the Royal Family. Plus, Phillip opens up about his experience living with cerebral palsy and delivers a moving poem that captures the profound reality of life lived in silence.

Project Managers: Andrea Rai & James Corley
Editor: James Corley & Phil Powell

Huge thanks to the National Lottery Reaching Communities Fund for supporting our Dis-labled podcast. Learn more about their amazing work: https://www.tnlcommunityfund.org.uk

All enquiries: podcast@communityfocus.co.uk
Website: https://www.communityfocus.co.uk/

Theme Music: Rastko Rasic & the students of Community FocusOther Music: Jazzy Frenchy by ⁠⁠⁠Benjamin Tissot

Transcript

Start

Gila 0:52

Community focus is an art centre for children and adults with disabilities. We are based in the Bower Burnage, North London, and offered collection of creative and well-being activities for all ages.

Havva 1:12

Hello, hello. I'm not paying. I'm not here.

Gila 1:17

Oh no, uh I'm not there.

Havva 1:20

I'm not there, yeah. That's it. I'm not there. I'm not here. I'm not home.

Intro

Richard 1:29

Welcome back listeners. My name is Richard. Today we'll be talking about the role family. And Phil talks about having a cerebral party.

James 1:43

How about we all introduce ourselves by saying our name and in a few words say how we're feeling? So for example, I'm James and I'm feeling

How are we all?

James 1:58

happy to be here.

Michael 2:03

Um you say your name and how you're feeling.

Havva 2:15

Oh, I'm Hapa and I feel happy. Uncle Uncle. Uncle.

Phillip R 2:23

I feel complete.

Andrea 2:28

I'm Andrea, and I found I feel like eating a bit of cake.

Phillip R 2:33

You can have your cake and eat it, can't you?

Gila 2:36

Um I'm Gila and I feel a bit uneasy.

Speaker 1 2:43

Okay.

Stuart 2:44

I still.

Andrea 2:49

Oh my Stuart.

Stuart 2:51

Thank you, Stuart.

Michael 2:52

Find Michael and I feel safe here. Oh, that's really lovely.

James 3:02

And how was your lunch? Lovely, it was made of me. What did you all have?

Havva 3:08

I had pangerine and cribs. Two pangerines.

unknown 3:12

Wow.

Phillip R 3:13

I had a hand a handbowl, a packet of bake of bacon cribs and then and but and grapes as well. Very nice.

Andrea 3:22

I've not had mine yet.

Phillip R 3:24

Oh yeah now. Oh, some grapes.

Gila 3:31

I had um deal pasta tomato pasta um with cheese and quick and a phantom.

Phillip R 3:45

Oh nice. Do you plug your eyes, dear?

Stuart 3:57

Well I think here, I hear here. Oh my watch you eat. Oh it is English.

James 4:05

Sandwich. Well done. Cheese. Very good. And Michael?

Michael 4:11

Yes, sir. I had a sandwich yogurt binol.

Havva 4:14

What about you about bad? You ate nothing.

Phillip R 4:20

Oh you get enough.

Havva 4:21

Oh, do you need nothing? Oh for you, you're dinner.

Gila 4:28

What about you, James?

James 4:29

I haven't had mine yet, but I've got it in my bag and it's pasta. How do we feel about pasta?

Gila 4:35

Laughter.

James 4:36

Do you? Do you like cold pasta or any hot pasta? Uh I like cold. Why?

Michael 4:45

Why? Because of the oil and the cholesterol. Oh, the oil helps with pasta.

unknown 4:51

Yeah.

James 4:53

Cholesterol. I've got any oil. Oh you can't have oil because you're cholesterol because of the cholesterol. Oh well that's yeah, it's tough. That's tough. Yeah.

Michael 5:03

My grandmother used to make pasta, she used to.

James 5:05

Did she? Yeah, yeah.

Michael 5:06

Yeah, yeah. She used to. Well, can't you make it?

James 5:10

Actually, yeah.

Michael 5:11

Well, she was Italian, you see.

James 5:13

Oh, was she? Yeah. That must have tasted brilliant.

Michael 5:18

It was fantastic, yeah. She passed away. She would never let me in the kitchen.

Andrea 5:27

Does she have a secret sauce?

Michael 5:30

Secret sauce, doesn't it? Italian stood there for the children, they don't let them put well for some reason.

James 5:39

Very nice.

Havva 5:42

Do you mix it with the pasta and we boil it? Then we've got to put chicken in it, in the in the spaghetti, and we eat it. Nice. So you can cook then, I mean. I can cook, my mum can cook, yeah, I can cook.

Phillip R 5:58

A little bit, yeah, a little bit. My dad the rest. Tonight I got fish and baked beans. Oh nice. My um cow Charlie. She's a lady, my friend Charlie, my cale Charlie. Um she did it for me this morning and I have it later when it's up and in the evening, yeah. Yeah. That sounds nice. Yeah. My favourite fruit is well, well, watermelon. Nice watermelon. Very nice.

James 6:26

Yeah, watermelon, that's very tasty. Alright guys, well, who are we? Who are we in terms of who are your hosts? Your co-hosts? Who wants to introduce us? And Andrea.

Speaker 1 6:44

Who's you?

Michael 6:51

Go on, I'll go. James. James. James!

James 7:01

Thank you. Thank you very much. Uh who's new who hasn't been before?

We meet Phill

Phillip R 7:08

I haven't. I am six I'm 60. 61. I got um great Arsenal supporter.

Stuart 7:17

Oh big place.

Phillip R 7:21

And I've got my own flat in Whetstone. Living Whetstone.

Michael 7:27

Nice place.

Phillip R 7:27

Yes, very nice place, yeah. I feel complete why I am, you know what I mean? And I feel loved I'm I'm I'm loved by people as well. I'm very I'm a PP, a people person.

Speaker 14 7:41

Yeah.

Phillip R 7:43

Yeah, I'm I look forward to coming here on Thursdays and Fridays, you know. I look forward to it, you know.

James 7:49

Yeah. Thank you, Philip. Thank you. And um who was that other new person?

We meet Stuart

James 7:54

Yeah, so what's your name? Stuart Stuart. And tell us a little bit about yourself.

Stuart 8:01

Yeah. Yeah, you go at home. That one can come. Yes, mm-hmm. New call girl.

Discussion: What do we think about the Royal Family?

Speaker 14 8:19

What's going on?

James 8:23

What are your opinions about the royal family?

Andrea 8:25

Let's take turns. Let's take turns. Let's take turns.

James 8:27

Say bye back. Why don't you kick off about that?

Michael 8:30

But I don't get on with the royal family. I don't mean about mak making making too much drama about everything. Telling lies and everything.

Andrea 8:39

About what?

Michael 8:41

Um what did you do about Prince Charles, down the arguments and on uh Twitter and uh on Netflix? I don't I don't know. Right.

Andrea 8:51

If you met King Charles, what would you say to him today, Baba?

Michael 8:56

I won't say nothing to her because I don't know. I don't know, I I know, but I don't know pretty Charles.

Andrea 9:04

What do you think of Camilla?

James 9:06

I think she's a bigger player. Okay. So you know where Babak sits on that side of the fence?

Andrea 9:12

I think we've got a bit more to go in, but yeah, yeah, yeah, interesting.

James 9:15

Okay. Have her?

Havva 9:16

What? Family! Yeah. I don't like Camellia. What she done to Diana.

Phillip R 9:24

Yes.

Havva 9:25

Pinchard did not look after Diana.

Phillip R 9:28

No, he didn't, no.

Havva 9:29

He did them because he wanted to marry Diana. And he was his girlfriend before, Camellia. And she married two husbands, I think. And she did not keep them.

Michael 9:41

But everyone gets divorced, you know.

Phillip R 9:43

I mean, there's not everyone, uh Michael. Not everyone.

Michael 9:48

But not everyone, but some people do get divorced. Yeah, yeah. So you I mean she's just She's a snob. I like her. I think she's what she done to Diana?

Havva 9:58

What she'd done to Diana? But look, she didn't look after Diana. Dinah's gonna come a queen.

Michael 10:06

But you still don't have to hate her. Yeah. I mean hate is negative is a is a negative word, isn't it? Hate is. It is. It is destructive. Destructive.

James 10:17

It is destructive. But there are reasons that Hannah has.

Havva 10:22

She's making a fool of herself, you know that in front of the people.

James 10:25

Okay. There we are. This is this is a the what about you, Philip?

Havva 10:29

What do you say, Philippe?

Phillip R 10:32

Um what gets me? What gets me kick King Charles 70s, 70s? Yeah, they got much longer to live, haven't they? To be a king or I mean, don't stand to stand what means.

Speaker 14 10:50

That's very true.

Phillip R 10:51

And every time I see King Charles, I think of of Diane. Diana, no?

Havva 10:58

She had blue eyes, yeah, she had lovely blue eyes. She was a lovely girl. Yeah.

Michael 11:03

Very sensitive.

Phillip R 11:05

Yeah, she was very sensitive. Yes, she was. She was in the charity as well.

Michael 11:08

Yeah, she did not charity.

Phillip R 11:10

Yeah. She loved the children. And the charity. She loved the children, yeah.

Havva 11:15

Yeah. And then the Camilla walked in. Camilla walked in, she took Richards away from Diana.

Phillip R 11:20

Yeah.

Havva 11:21

She wasn't happy that girl.

Phillip R 11:23

No, she wasn't no. So I've got I've got mixed feelings about those two. Do you want me to care? Yeah.

Havva 11:29

What'd you say? What'd you say?

James 11:31

Um as our honorary Gen Z in the group.

Gila 11:34

Yeah. Um I need to be careful because I know have a like and I personally got like. Um because I feel like he's evident too. He has got long to me. Um whether Queen was alive. I I respect her so much. Um but now it's King. And I don't know how that will play out in Far Royal. So I'm a bit I don't I like King Charles as a person. Don't take that don't take that one way. But I don't actually know how he will play out in Far Royal and I think like just how he will be.

James 12:36

And can I ask, as a as a young person, do you support the monarchy? Or do you think we don't need the monarchy?

Gila 12:48

I don't know.

James 12:49

I need to think about it. Okay. Well that's very good.

Michael 12:52

The king is a pretty decent person, does a lot for people, does a prince's prince to us. So I don't think he's a bad guy. Well, to me he is. No, no, to you he is, I know that. No, he shouldn't be king. I think he should be king. No.

Andrea 13:06

Well, you know, we've got to respect each other's wishes. Yeah. Opinions about, yeah.

James 13:11

Should we go on to something lighter? Yeah.

Gila 13:13

Well about you, you and to it.

James 13:16

No, we're neutral because we're spincivers. It's not about our opinions, it's about beautiful opinions.

Michael 13:25

What do you think of it?

Gila 13:26

Yeah, got it's on this page for the city.

James 13:30

You're telling us. Alright. Scribble. I mean, um what do I think? I quite enjoy the pageantry of it. I quite like the beauty of um all the palaces and um and I'm into the history of royals. Like I love looking up like about those mad kings like Henry VIII and all his wives, and I love history of royal families. But I'm not as interested in royal family present day. Having said that why not? Because I think they have a lot of power and money, and I wonder whether they're using that to the best of their in in the most charitable way. I that would be my question. But having said that, if there wasn't a royal family, something else could be in its place, which is even worse. So sometimes it's good to be thankful for what you've got. Yeah. You know.

Phillip talks about Cerebral Palsy

Phillip R 14:39

Do you want to have a go for this? Yeah, I was. Yeah, go for it. I've got uh thermal pausy on my knife. I was brain damaged on my right side. And I wasn't bullark it, uh something happened to me. I was brain damaged on my right side. And the whole this side is is weak. And I've broken my collarbone on my shoulder, my shoulder about four times because I keep falling over because my right foot goes over, you know. And um I used to I used to have seizures down the right side. Fitz down the right side, but I touched wood, no scissors, no fits on the And I thought to me, when I was at home, my parents, I thought I'd give it up. But now I've got freedom, I've got people that mean care about me. I've got so many families that want me, you know. It's really lovely, you know? And and my dear Susie. She my uh my late wife, she was um in a wheelchair since she was 21. She had cerebral palsy as well. But we had a lot of things in common, we did.

James 15:51

So can I ask about a few questions about cerebral palsy? Yeah. So for those who don't know what cerebral palsy is, how would you describe it in terms of what it's like for you having cerebral palsy?

Phillip R 16:04

No, my spine, no, because I've got I've got if I didn't have my c I've got a caliper on there because I I was knocked down by a car and broke my hip down the right side. And I thought that'd be the end of me. But now I've got my caliper I've got my my Miss Trolley with me. It's very handy, isn't it? Miss Trolley. And also if I don't take this trolley, I've got to stick with me as well at home. And the pe it's the people's attitude towards disabled people that I don't like, yeah?

Speaker 14 16:36

Yeah.

Phillip R 16:37

People think because you've got a disability, you can't think for each other, but we can. And the counselor don't understand as well. Well, they want to take the money away or get them to work, you know? And lose their benefits, do we? And I always say you don't understand what it's like to have a disability until one day it might happen to yourself.

Michael 16:58

It happened to a lot of people, as well.

Phillip R 16:59

Yeah, that's that's right, yeah, yeah. And when I was at home, I felt I felt like giving up. But now I don't know. I've got my freedom, I'm very happy.

James 17:10

And what do you think people don't understand about cerebral palsy? What would you like people to know about it?

Phillip R 17:16

Don't be afraid of people with disabilities. It might it might people think because you've got a disability, you got you might catch it, but you don't, you don't catch it.

Andrea 17:25

Have you got any advice like to people that feel maybe they've got cerebral palsy and they just feel a bit not a bit of a bad day, but have you got any nice advice you can give them?

Phillip R 17:36

I I always say to people talk to someone, talk to someone. It doesn't matter what who they are or anything, be careful because people speak if they can complain about it, they would get into trouble. I was very quiet when I was at home. We believe it now. But I'll it's no, but I'm very quiet. I was very quiet, yeah.

James 18:00

Yeah, it's very hard to believe. Phil, you are the most um social um gregarious person, I'd say. You're what in the whole community focus. Am I? Yeah. You really are. So that's so what I think I'm getting from what you're saying is um your advice would be to speak to people.

Phillip R 18:21

Yeah, yeah. And that is a way of healing. And don't bottle it, but don't bottle things up inside. It'll hurt you. It will.

Andrea: from Liverpool to Sri Lanka

Havva 18:44

Yeah. She's in Liverpool.

Gila 18:46

And also she got she lives in she lived in Sri Lanka. I did, but she now I think yeah, now I'm in.

Richard 18:58

Yes, I remember you were in Sri Lanka for a while.

Speaker 14 19:02

Yeah, I don't know.

Richard 19:03

Because I seem to remember on the Friday social you talk to us from there.

Andrea 19:13

I did. So I've got my stories that nobody believed. No, I didn't.

Gila 19:21

Oh like you taught like you teach me and I have intra I know what like that's so cool.

Andrea 19:28

I don't believe you like a teen. Monkeys and peacocks in my garden, not pigeons and uh sparrows.

Phillip R 19:37

What about elephants? Like peacocks.

Andrea 19:39

Elephants, yeah.

Phillip R 19:40

Peacocks are my favourite birds.

Andrea 19:42

Yeah, they're beautiful.

Phillip R 19:43

But this but this but it's interfacing.

Andrea 19:46

I no need to hear them in the morning at night, and they fly, peacocks fly. They sit in the trees. Wow, believe. And I can do peacock noise. Come on! That's what they sound like. That was very good. I reckon that's good.

James 20:06

That was great. Yeah. I want to get Swanka now.

Andrea 20:10

Yeah. Do you know any? I think uh Richard, yeah, a bit about you can name some bands that come from Liverpool.

Havva 20:18

The Beatles. Yes.

Andrea 20:19

Anyone else?

Havva 20:21

Abba. No Abba sweet.

Richard 20:24

Ah Abba Abba, should we? Silla Black, was she from Liverpool?

Andrea 20:29

Yeah, yeah.

Phillip R 20:30

What is what is what is Cell Black's real name? Priscilla White. Yes, very good. Wow.

James 20:38

Really? Yes.

Richard 20:39

Yeah, that was her real name.

James 20:41

Yes. I have no idea.

Phillip R 20:45

Silla Black was a stage name. Yeah. Stage stage name. That sounds better than Priscilla White. Yeah, Priscilla. If you're white, eh? Yeah.

unknown 20:53

Priscilla White.

Phillip R 20:54

Yeah.

Phillip's poem called 'Silence'

Phillip R 21:02

I I said to I said to um Teddy both that I I wrote a poem about silence. About silence. About silence. Being deaf, you know? And I got the poem by I know it by heart.

Speaker 14 21:16

Go on, draw that, draw me, read it.

Phillip R 21:17

Yeah, can I reach when I say it, yeah? Yeah. It's called Silence. Everything was silence. He couldn't hear people's voices. He couldn't communicate. He couldn't hear the doorbell ring. He couldn't hear the telephone ring. He couldn't hear the sound of music. He couldn't go out on his own. He felt frustrated. He felt not inside of himself. He felt scared, scared. Everything was silent. Wow.

unknown 21:50

Wow.

Phillip R 21:50

It makes you it makes it makes that powerful. It makes you think, doesn't it, about if you I had a friend who used he used used to live near me. And when we used to wait for the ambulance to get out wait outside to come and collect us. I just said sign language to him. And he and his my mum popped her head out the window and said, Don't do sign language, you can lip read.

James 22:19

Well that's another thing. So my friend as well is hard of hearing. Yeah. And she says most of what she does is lip read. Lip reads, yes. So and without anyone knowing, they just it's like you adapt to whatever you're given. Yeah. And I think that's really important because it means that people are um in contr in control of what they have, and we should focus on that.

Phillip R 22:47

Yeah. You know. And there's three different sign languages there. Yeah. There's significant three different uh sign language. There's Patrick Gorman, there's Mackinton, and there's BSL. And the most popular one in London we use is BSL. Which is which is sign language, yeah.

Gila 23:04

Ah, I thought it was McKiton.

Phillip R 23:07

Well I'll be I taught at at my day centre in Grand Park, um BSL. Yeah.

Speaker 14 23:16

That's brilliant.

Phillip R 23:16

That for example you say what is your name? And you say my name is and you spell it out. My name is P H I L L I P That's amazing.

Gila 23:41

That is amazing.

Michael 23:44

Thank you. Just so the brains came well.

James 23:47

Yeah. Well, did anyone watch Strictly Come Dancing? Oh yeah, I did, yeah. I can't remember her surname. She was in East Enders. Yeah, she was, yeah. And she's hard of hearing. And uh she won. Yeah, she won. Yeah, she did, yeah. It was amazing. There is a wonderful one. Strictly come dancing. Yeah, yeah. She was an incredible dancer. Yes. So you you know should be no limits.

Andrea 24:16

No limits.

Phillip R 24:17

And I always say, don't give up. If you're disabled or not. Don't give up, yeah.

Havva and Phillip's cats

Phillip R 24:23

That's right, Philip.

Michael 24:24

Shine the light on me.

Speaker 14 24:26

Yeah.

Phillip R 24:26

Some way of the job.

Andrea 24:27

Shine the light on the thing.

Phillip R 24:28

Yeah.

Andrea 24:29

Talk about dancing.

Havva 24:30

Yes.

Andrea 24:31

I hear your cat dancers have a help her with it.

Havva 24:35

Yeah, she does, yeah, she dance, yeah. She does the funny walk. Just share. Sometimes she does it, sometimes she does it, sometimes she doesn't.

James 24:45

So what does she walk like?

Havva 24:47

Oh she walks like this. Sometimes she walks like this, she shakes a bum. Sometimes she's, you know, she may catch she not well. She shakes a bum.

Phillip R 24:58

Yeah.

Havva 25:01

She's limping. She's not. She's funny my mum.

Andrea 25:04

She plays tricks.

Havva 25:05

She plays tricks on my mum.

Andrea 25:07

I know they do, yeah.

James 25:10

It sounds like she's got you around her little finger. Yeah. Yeah, claw, yeah.

Andrea 25:16

What's your cat called? Appalachia.

Gila 25:19

Yeah, we know.

Havva 25:20

Yeah.

Gila 25:21

Do you sing with a song every time you see her?

Havva 25:24

I see her, yeah, I sing her song, yeah. Does she sleep on your bed? No, she's not allowed, she's not allowed. I just not allowed it. Mummy won't mummy won't let her. I chucked her out. You chat her out. She sleeps in the passage. She sleeps in the passage.

Phillip R 25:39

Does anyone else here have a cat? I used to have I used to have four cats when I was at home.

Havva 25:44

Four?

Phillip R 25:45

Yes, yes. With my mum. I had rabbits, eight rabbits.

Havva 25:49

What?

Phillip R 25:50

Two I had dogs, tortoises, hamsters, gerbils, guinea pigs.

Havva 25:55

Oh my god. Yeah, basically.

Phillip R 25:59

It's enough for yourself. And I used my mum used to feed screws. We used to get screws in our garden.

unknown 26:05

Oh my gosh.

Phillip R 26:06

Yeah.

Andrea 26:07

What was your favourite pet?

Phillip R 26:09

My favourite pet was my blackie. She she was lovely, she was. Every time I sit down, she came on on onto my lap and and sat and purred, you know, start purring. Yeah. Black cat. Black cat, yeah. Blackie, yeah. Yes. Very good. But I left home when I was thirty school and look at me now. That's right. Twenty-eight years I left home.

Andrea 26:31

I used to dress my cat up. I used to dress my cat up.

Havva 26:35

Oh. Well you didn't. I did. Black cat doesn't like him.

Andrea 26:39

My cat used to pair. She didn't like my one. I used to put baby growers on it.

Michael 26:44

Oh, which catch a boy.

Andrea 26:45

Oh.

Michael 26:46

I had three duck sounds.

Andrea 26:48

Did you?

Michael 26:49

Yeah, they were uh they were sort of long heads or short heads? They're quite fearless because one of them changed the horse.

James 26:55

Yeah, they're vicious little things. We we we had one as well. Oh, did you? Yeah, miniature long hairs, yeah. Bertie.

Michael 27:02

And they shouted their postman, and it's strange.

James 27:05

School dog syndrome.

Michael 27:07

That's it, yeah.

James 27:08

Yeah. They just get a bit.

Michael 27:10

And they like to be a centre of attention, they'd like to be part of a family.

unknown 27:13

Yeah.

Michael 27:19

Oh, I have to go and cause my cows here.

Andrea 27:21

Okay, all right. Oh yeah, we're talking about it.

James 27:24

Okay, see you next week, Michael. One word for the day. Michael, what do you want to start? Just one word for the day. What a laugh, how about

Final Thoughts

James 27:32

it?

Andrea 27:32

What a laugh.

James 27:32

What a laugh.

Michael 27:33

Brilliant. Thank you very much. Okay, goodbye. Bye.

James 27:41

It could be any words, just a word you want to say, and then love.

Phillip R 27:50

Love. Love, yeah.

Andrea 27:52

Love have you got a word for the day?

Havva 27:54

Uh kind.

Andrea 27:56

Kind.

Gila 27:59

Do you love? Um.

Andrea 28:05

Happy. Yeah. Okay, brilliant.

Phillip R 28:08

Alright, well, done. Community focused. Community focused. We're here for you. With me and you.

Speaker 28:24

All the other.

Speaker 2 28:32

Yes. We can review.

Speaker 9 28:39

We're here for you. Yes. All point of you. Our point of view.