Episode 34 - AI Took Over Rob's Week… And Rachel's Date Went Completely Off the Rails

This week on Out Loud with Rob & Rachel, Rob reveals why he disappeared for nearly 40 hours and how AI is completely changing the way he works. He explains how he's building automation that could replace hours of repetitive work and why most people still don't understand what AI is truly capable of.

Rachel gives an honest (and hilarious) update on her first date after getting back out there. From awkward boundary-crossing moments to realizing exactly what she's looking for in a partner, she doesn't hold back.

The conversation also dives into:

•  Why prompting is the real secret to AI 
•  Can AI ever replace teachers or therapists? 
•  Technology in education and what it's doing to students 
•  Why work ethic seems to be changing across generations 
•  What really attracts men vs. women 
•  Dating in your 50s, red flags, and trusting your instincts 
•  Books, podcasts, emotional intelligence, and what makes someone truly interesting 

It's another episode full of ADHD tangents, laughs, honest conversations, and plenty of moments that will have you saying, "Yep... I've been there."

🎙️ Listen now and let us know:
 Have you ever known within the first five minutes that a date wasn't going anywhere?

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

Welcome to Out Loud with Rob and Rachel. This is what happens when two ADHD brains come together and think out loud.

SPEAKER_00 0:07

Hey everybody, thanks for tuning in again to the Out Loud Podcast, episode 34.

SPEAKER_02 0:13

34.

SPEAKER_00 0:14

I'm gonna start saying the episode number now. Okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 0:16

Is that anything?

SPEAKER_00 0:17

Like didn't Yeah, I just started at last three.

SPEAKER_02 0:19

Yeah, I know. I like it. I actually like it because then it's like I can't believe it's been that long. I saw someone shout out Tria. Um, one of the women that I work with, that I used to work with at one at the school that I was at last, and she said that um she loves she loves um listening to our podcast. So I just want to say thank you for supporting. Um we appreciate you. We really do.

SPEAKER_00 0:41

Was it somebody expected to listen to?

SPEAKER_02 0:43

No, I actually was a little surprised. I'm not surprised because she's fun, she's a very fun person. Um, but um, but it was really nice to hear that she was, you know, that somebody little out of the box was, you know, listening to it and that's it's entertaining for her. Right. But she is in similar age, so that's part of the reason I think that um it's um it's entertaining for her. And I told her to uh tune in because I um I went on my date. Oh boy. So um I told her to tune in for this week's episode for the update on the date. Yeah. So we'll get into that in a little bit. So stick around for that. Don't leave. We're c we're we're gonna get to the juicy parts in a little while.

SPEAKER_00 1:20

Back on the market, back on the officially.

SPEAKER_02 1:23

Uh in true ADHD fashion, because you know, that's where we are hearing out loud. Um, why don't you tell our listeners what you've um been um knee deep in that nobody's heard from him for days for days. Yeah, so he's been busy.

SPEAKER_00 1:41

Yeah, 30, 40 hours, like in two days, three days.

SPEAKER_02 1:45

So anybody who knows anything about ADHD, you know it's feast or famine, right? Like you're either laying on the couch and you can't get motivated for shit, or you're balls to the wall, like all in, which is where Rob found.

SPEAKER_00 1:57

And it's also a combination of two, I think, with the ADHD. It's it's what they call the state of flow. When you're working on a project, it's not too easy where you're bored, and it's not too difficult where you get frustrated.

SPEAKER_02 2:10

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 2:10

So that's a really that's a really important part of it. It's because it if you're always struggling with the next thing. Yeah, then you want to you want to like you saw me. I was just yeah, that was the first time I struggled at 40 hours that I had interesting. I had a fuck enough. And I I was here and and plus you're learning.

SPEAKER_02 2:25

Did I bring bad karma?

SPEAKER_00 2:27

No, no, no. I had to actually create something. But anyway, so first off, like I I get a lot of like um compliments, my knowledge of AI.

SPEAKER_02 2:37

Yes, I it's true.

SPEAKER_00 2:38

He's but but uh up until this week they were all undeserved because I truly very uh well yeah, yeah, because mind-boggling. Yeah, well, it was for me because um I am more than a hundred percent convinced that most people don't really understand what this AI is capable what AI is capable of doing, how it's gonna make your life easier, and how you can literally work instead of 50, 60 hours a week, maybe you should only be working 15, 20 hours a week, making the same amount of money, and just a little more because you might have more hours of productivity in there. And if you want to work 60 hours a week, you can because you just get more done. So uh reading a LinkedIn post, and it was just something about you know what I do for a living, digital marketing, and AI. So I of course I use AI for my digital marketing business, help me with content, help me with image generation. But the the biggest piece I was missing, and I think a lot of people are missing, is the automation of everything. That's what AI is for, is to have a robot to clean your house. It's tasks that you and I do every single day. That's not a task that we you and I do every single day, where you can program a software to do that to do those tasks. It takes a while to get there. So I'm 40 hours into this to make my work life uh automated, right? And so for instance, I have to do the I do the same task a lot, and it's adding web pages with a certain search engine optimization, that's what makes you show up on Google, and sometimes I'll spend eight hours doing that. So I can create a I started creating a framework, and part of it's done where everything that's in my head, right, my strategies, my philosophies that I know that work, I'm programming into AI right now. It's both Chat GTP's helping me prompt and another um something called Claude. It's called Clawed Code. So my English language prompts it into code, makes it makes the code to make my vision come to life.

SPEAKER_02 5:08

I I'm aren't you afraid that somebody's that somebody can then tap into that code that you created and then you're you're not needed anymore?

SPEAKER_00 5:18

No one's gonna 90% of business owners, 99% of are not gonna do what I'm doing now. It's difficult. I mean, it's it's not I mean 40 hours, I'm 20% done. I mean, and if they can do it, that means their business is not successful. And maybe they should you know what I mean? Like anytime, no matter what decade it was, you don't you don't have people hire you that are do-it-yourselfers. If they're do-it-yourselfers, they're not your client. You know what I mean? They're they're they're they're just not your client. You want somebody just get it done, you know. I I charge on deliverables. So if it takes me two hours to do something now instead of 40 hours, I still charge the same. I exactly. I don't I'm not an employee, I don't get paid per hour. Right, right, right, right, right.

SPEAKER_02 6:04

You do it per task. Per deliverables.

SPEAKER_00 6:06

So if I can make my deliverables much faster and and more quantity. So now maybe let's just say instead of only creating you know 10 web pages for my client to show up on Google a month, maybe I can create 50.

SPEAKER_01 6:22

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 6:23

Right? And charge the I can charge the same. I don't mind. You know what I mean? But it's so right now I have a system where um Wow it it's from scratch, it creates the web page, it changes the content to that specific area town, because a lot of it's per town. So I showed you. So when they talk about a town like Fairhaven, New Jersey, said some people live in old cottages or new construction. You got to keep that in mind when ripping out old construction. So everything's very personal. So when somebody's in Fairhaven types in Fairhaven, bathroom remodeling, that's what I'm doing, and it comes up, it's gonna speak directly to them. There's it's 100% automated, but I prompt it to do that. To do that, exactly. Right because I know that works.

SPEAKER_02 7:10

So, what other industries do you think could use that?

SPEAKER_00 7:12

Oh, I mean, for you, it's kind of everything so seamless. So it's um it's not so much industries. You have to be more careful with legal law, so lawyers and doctors, there's some, but but you can put those parameters in, and you can also have what do you mean by that?

SPEAKER_02 7:28

Like, why can't they why do they have to be careful? I'm playing like I just so that I don't know. So it ha you have to make right. Obviously, you have to make sure that it's correct.

SPEAKER_00 7:38

Right, it's not Connecticut law, it's New Jersey law.

SPEAKER_02 7:40

I see. Right.

SPEAKER_00 7:41

So so maybe you you download a whole playbook of something about as well as a DUI.

SPEAKER_02 7:48

Right, in that specific area.

SPEAKER_00 7:50

Yeah, so it understands relevant to that, right?

SPEAKER_02 7:54

Okay, so you give relevant information.

SPEAKER_00 7:56

But you also want to get the client's expectation. So I was talking to a high school friend of mine, and I was like, uh, so so he got me some business and we're talking, and I want more lawyers, I want to get into legal law for my digital marketing business. So you go, would you go to Cherry? Um, I just find it interesting. Okay. Yeah, I just find that whole interesting. So we're gonna try to set up maybe a meeting in Cherry Hill with one of his clients. But I said, How about if I do this? How about if I record with them knowing our whole conversation? I make a transcript, their expectations, and I prompt it into AI so AI knows what my clients' expectations are.

SPEAKER_01 8:31

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 8:32

Fucking brilliant, right? So these are all part of the prompts of their concern. So I'm training AI to do it. So it's all my own.

SPEAKER_02 8:41

So then you would develop the web page or whatever it is based literally directly on what came out of their mouths.

SPEAKER_00 8:47

Right. And plus other stuff.

SPEAKER_02 8:49

With enhancements of what you need you know needs to be there, but it's not interpreted. Right. It's literally from their mouths. Right.

SPEAKER_00 8:56

Like, isn't that incredible? I mean, yeah. So, but then you create all this stuff, but now it's automation. So now if they need 50 pages for 50 different things to show up on Google, it's all it's all their input, my input. So what I'm saying is like AI, most of us are using to write social media posts, responses, and and and uh creating images. That's like such the dummy down level.

SPEAKER_02 9:23

Well, and I have to tell you, I I am getting so tired of seeing the same flyers everywhere.

SPEAKER_00 9:30

And you can't read it.

SPEAKER_02 9:31

You can't, and they look exactly the same. I don't know what's for yoga and what's for dating and what's for a retreat somewhere and what's for a kid's program. They all look exactly the same. It's awful.

SPEAKER_00 9:44

I know what's funny, is like you showed me something. Like, read this. Like it was a but I was really trying. I wasn't in that, like I know it's too much for me.

SPEAKER_02 9:53

I'm gonna go back. I'm going back. I love Canva, and I actually truly enjoy creating things on Canva. And AI like stole that a little bit because it it create, you know, chat cheap, you could do it.

SPEAKER_00 10:08

I gotta be.

SPEAKER_02 10:09

Tell it to pre tell it in in Claude to create these flyers for me. What do you do?

SPEAKER_00 10:15

So this is what I do, right? Well, first, if you're gonna create flyers, okay, read a book about graphic design. Like if you're gonna create a like learn what's good because you can't prompt something if you don't know what it's supposed to look like. Okay. So you have to prompt it. So what you could do, you can go to ChatGTP and say, Look, you're my graphic artist. I need a classic ad that doesn't have a lot of garbage on it, like you're seeing all the time. You can even show them an ad. I did this the other day. I want the ad to look like this for my business, right? I want you to prompt it. Give me a prompt for Canva.

SPEAKER_02 10:54

Right, okay. Canva does have an AI.

SPEAKER_00 10:56

G give the prompt for Canva so I can make manual changes.

SPEAKER_02 11:01

I know, but I do that. I do do that. But the problem is the Canva AI is not great.

SPEAKER_00 11:06

No, I agree with you. Yeah, it's awesome. Until the other day.

SPEAKER_02 11:10

Oh.

SPEAKER_00 11:11

Chat wrote me out a prompt that's like 40 more. That's what I mean. It's not the AI, it's your prompting.

SPEAKER_02 11:18

Yes, I agree with you.

SPEAKER_00 11:20

Right, but yes, but I'll show you later. Okay. It created me a prompt. Like it's code. Like a prompt, not code. Oh. Just a prompt, exactly what I wanted.

SPEAKER_01 11:30

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 11:31

And the ad was something that I never designed personally for myself. I never saw anybody else post, and I never saw Canva AI do it.

SPEAKER_02 11:40

And then you were able to edit it in Canvas on your own.

SPEAKER_00 11:43

You know how like AI, like it's a pain in the ass check because you want something a little bigger, a little smaller, or different. And it's the thing you have that has to redo. Yes. You can change it. You do it, right? I got it 90%. So but it was a prompt that was super long. Okay. So it's it's that's interesting. Okay. So people's terrible AI, people's terrible uh social media post, it's not because it's AI.

SPEAKER_02 12:04

I know, it's the prompt. I do know that the prompts in AI are so important. They really are.

SPEAKER_00 12:09

Like it's I'm aware of it. It's cra I know, but when you start really testing it, like when you really start um like you're gonna be more aware of it.

SPEAKER_02 12:19

I like it's I have a few projects in the works, so I'll I'll I'll and I am starting the semester. So most of my um, you know, I create all I create a lecture notebook every single week for each class, and I give it to them after the lecture so that they can, you know, they don't have to take their own notes all the time. Um and and I use Canva because I then import it into it's so funny. And I don't know, maybe you can I use Canva to create my each slide, but then I import the Canva images of my of my slides into Google Slides so that nothing moves.

SPEAKER_00 12:57

Right, I gotcha. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 12:59

Because I I I I download them each as PNGs once I've created it in Canva and then input the actual PNG onto a Google slide as the background.

SPEAKER_03 13:11

Right.

SPEAKER_02 13:12

So that they can download it. And you know, a lot of my students come with like tablets that they write on. In college, I'm talking about, when I teach the college courses, so they can download it as a PowerPoint presentation and they can literally take their pens and write right on my slide.

SPEAKER_00 13:25

I gotcha.

SPEAKER_02 13:26

But um whenever I try to do that through Canva lately, I mean not through Canva, through chat, and then bring it to Canva, it's never good.

SPEAKER_00 13:37

We're gonna do something after and and what I so I guess the the point is with the prompting is you know, I'm not really a graphic artist. I I I know th about design, but not a a true graphic artist, right? So if if a client came and said, Um, I just want you to use AI and this is what I want, and then they told me and a seasoned graphic artist for 30 years, and they're just using AI, I it would be the same. There's would be much better because they know how to prompt. They know the lingo. Okay. But like that's that's what I'm saying. Like it's the I don't think I really I I know you know prompting's important. I know a lot of people they hear that all the time, but until this week was the first time I saw like all right, I gotta, you know, instead of just But there are certain industries that don't need to use AI like that.

SPEAKER_02 14:32

So they wouldn't know that. Do you know what I mean? Like they wouldn't, they would only use it as the basics, I think.

SPEAKER_00 14:37

Well, I know, but that's why it looks the it looks this the same. But what I'm saying, like, you know, uh an an hour YouTube video learning about graphic design will change your that's all I'm not saying, you know, take a college course. I mean, just you know, so you don't have uh you know uh uh three pages on one four by five images that you look like that's that's what I mean. Just learn design. You know what I mean? That's all, but especially if you are gonna be making flyers on the basis. Any tasks you do for your business, you you know, um where it's automated, like like like simple tasks that's that's similar or almost the same every day.

SPEAKER_02 15:19

It reminds me of like the Jetsons. That's what made when you first said it, it was like those things. I remember when we were remember the Jetsons, and do you did you watch the Jetsons and how like those simple coffee making, all of those odd like just mundane tasks in their house were all done by robots?

SPEAKER_00 15:34

Right, yeah, yeah. Yeah, well, well, right. Yeah, so so I won't talk about too much of it because I don't know if it's bor I don't think it's boring our audience. I think it's pretty interesting, you know. Everybody for piss some.

SPEAKER_02 15:44

I mean, there are some people who it's you know, they don't, you know, some people don't go on the computer at all.

SPEAKER_00 15:49

What took me 40 hours to complete, I did eight hours worth of work in about an hour through AI where I didn't have to do anything. Like what would have taken me eight hours and it's better than I could have done. Right. Because humans, we can make these stupid mistakes, and with websites and coding, the what the mistakes are invisible. Right. Yeah, where with AI it's reading the back end. Right. So eight hours I was sitting on my recliner, I I prompt it real quick, write 10 blogs, blah blah blah. Clicked okay, and you see it working, you see open up WordPress, like like so so now that's seven hours I can try to get more business, go play golf, be a better father.

SPEAKER_02 16:31

Like Yeah, no, that's great for your industry, is what I'm saying. Like someone in education, that doesn't take away. It takes away some of the after school work. Well, that's a lot, but it doesn't take away, yeah. But with all due respect, those are types like it's funny. I um I just had this conversation with someone the other day. Those tasks that take forever, uh, that's how you get in in my industry, that's how you get to know your kids. Like it's taking it home in the quiet and looking at those papers and that assignment and those kinds of things and really breathing it in away from yeah, I mean automation, like so you know how your kids are already.

SPEAKER_00 17:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 17:10

And then you're right, like data collection and those kinds of things.

SPEAKER_00 17:14

You're popping it, say, okay, every week for this student. Right. I this this is this is the story about the stuff.

SPEAKER_02 17:20

Now that you're saying it like that, it's making me think like as I'm embarking on this next school year, are there things like communication with the parents that I will be doing on a regular basis, that I can now have You would be able to. Right. Like someone, you know, something like that, create the thing, and maybe I just input the relevant information each week. Right, right. So that I can I get that.

SPEAKER_00 17:42

It's not like your cookie cutter. It's right, it's all the but it's and it's gonna remember the information that most people would forget. Right. That's what I mean. So just imagine that, okay, this this student um str this is a student style learning. Give me some cue cards.

SPEAKER_02 17:57

Oh no, I use that. I use that on a regular basis.

SPEAKER_00 18:00

So just imagine if it's automated. So every Monday you come in, it's like, okay, for for Chad.

SPEAKER_02 18:06

Right.

SPEAKER_00 18:07

You know, uh make me the Q cards for this this week, math. Well, I have to tell you that I'm And then it gets emailed to the parents automatically. I can like see that would be very well that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_02 18:18

That's something that's what I'm saying. So like that connection, right. Like that connection, that's different. I would use it for that.

SPEAKER_00 18:25

Right, but that's what I mean.

SPEAKER_02 18:26

Um then you could say it's hard to take the personalization away from teaching, though.

SPEAKER_00 18:31

Like you the I don't like the AI but you're not, you're feeding it uh this is what I think you're you're giving it the information, but you it's just you can always add to it, subtract No, I I know what you're saying, but certain things don't need to be computer generated, is what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_02 18:48

A lot of my day happens in the moment.

SPEAKER_00 18:51

Right.

SPEAKER_02 18:52

So this is what they are teachable moments that come up as so this is what you're thinking about AI.

SPEAKER_00 18:58

And I'm gonna go at you a little bit. Okay, no, I'm calf kidding. Everybody feels that not my career. You can't do it. I'm not saying that.

SPEAKER_02 19:08

No, but I'm not saying that because I use AI a lot in my career. Like I was talking about But I can't stop teaching and say, hey, let me feed this into Chat GPT right now. Like my kids are gonna be like, fuck me, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's I don't have I'm not in front of a computer all day.

SPEAKER_00 19:22

No, yeah, but that's not that's not what I'm doing. I'm talking about daily tasks. So when you're teaching, that's not a daily task.

SPEAKER_02 19:29

There aren't so many daily tasks in teaching that are the same every day. No, and at least not in mine. That's what I'm saying to you.

SPEAKER_00 19:37

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 19:37

So a lot of the things that come up in a daily in a day happen authentically and organically.

SPEAKER_00 19:44

No, I gotcha. No, I know.

SPEAKER_02 19:45

So there are certain things I could use that for, but I can't tell you in in May what I'm gonna be working on. So I could, you know, i it may change. So that, you know, yours is more, you know what you're gonna be needing to do throughout the year for this client.

SPEAKER_03 20:01

Right.

SPEAKER_02 20:01

That aspect of it doesn't change. Mine is more fluid.

SPEAKER_03 20:05

Right, right.

SPEAKER_02 20:06

That's where I'm saying there are limitations to how much I can use AI.

SPEAKER_00 20:10

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 20:10

That that's all I'm saying. So um, you know, and then and then a kid could get, you know, so I I see what you're saying as far as programming certain things in. I do do that. And it's easier for me to do it in my college courses.

SPEAKER_00 20:22

Right, that makes sense.

SPEAKER_02 20:23

Than it would be for my day, you know, my public education, because those are kids that are all over the place.

SPEAKER_00 20:30

I was I was talking, getting back to what what I said, uh um people said, well, not my, you know, like that because that's a pride thing.

SPEAKER_02 20:38

Oh, I know it is because people think it's cheating.

SPEAKER_00 20:40

No, no, people think no, what I do is special. So I'm but I'm not talking about you here. I'm talking about I was talking to a therapist. It's like, AI's never gonna replace therapy. I was like, yes, it already has. It it's it's helping me with things I struggle with, tools and toolboxes. Right. It it will it can replace it.

SPEAKER_03 21:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:01

You just have to have a lot of things. Yeah, because you know what?

SPEAKER_02 21:05

I actually ask, like, sometimes when I'm like I'm bored and I need a project, I'll be like, give me a good dopamine rush that'll and that is like I'm not calling a therapist to ask them what they should be doing.

SPEAKER_00 21:16

Or a life coach, right? Right. Like I'm just or or I need something in the moment. So now if you're a business owner, you say, How can I have 10 AI therapists? I know it sounds terrible and people hate to hear this, but it's just the fucking way it is.

SPEAKER_02 21:28

I know. I I don't want to think that there's going to be a world where people are going to be obsolete in their need. Um, I just in their relevance, I don't I want to say. Not in their need. In their relevance, that would really make me sad.

SPEAKER_00 21:41

So where I I think it will go is people aren't going to be obsolete, they're just not gonna have to work 40, 50 hours.

SPEAKER_02 21:48

Yeah, but here's my question to you about stuff like that. In an elementary school or a high school, like I was in a meeting where they were actually talking about in not Not in high school, lower than high school, having kids learning through online in the schools, like online programs in the schools. So they're staring at a computer and learning not from a live person. Well, it might be a live person, but the person might be in like Kansas. I don't know where they would be. Like there comes a point where, with all due respect, that's a little too young to be learning not tangibly from somebody who's right in front of you.

SPEAKER_00 22:28

Yeah, I mean, I I think I think it it's fine for kids that are academically okay. Right, yeah, but but the typical person is um yeah, I don't know. How how AI will you you often talk about differentiating learning. Right, right.

SPEAKER_02 22:47

So Oh, I already use AI. There's a program called Diffit. Yeah, and I have to tell you, I mean, Diffit, I will do your I love it. I'm very proficient already in your thing, so bring it on. Whoever wants if you watch this and you know Diffit, I'm a fan. It literally is a differentiated instruction AI platform for education. Yeah. And it's fantastic with limitations.

SPEAKER_00 23:10

Well, yeah, no, of course.

SPEAKER_02 23:12

You know, what I have not found, and this is interesting, what I have not found are programs that are appropriate for students with special needs, like beyond just your inclusion student or your, you know, your student who needs logistics some, you know, interventions or accommodations kind of thing. AI does not work for students with severe special needs.

SPEAKER_00 23:34

It's less predictable.

SPEAKER_02 23:35

It just doesn't work for them.

SPEAKER_00 23:36

Like it's less predictable. Yeah, special needs is a launch spectrum. Right. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_02 23:41

Um if you show me something that can, you know, really work for I I have yet to find right.

SPEAKER_00 23:48

And the more data it gets, the better it gets. I mean, that's how AI AI works. Right. You know, but right, right, right, right.

SPEAKER_02 23:54

And you can't always give it away.

SPEAKER_00 23:55

But but what if what what if the AI works for the uh um the students that that uh you know are doing well already and you have more time for the special there's more resources for the special needs. Like that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_02 24:08

Like there's a lot of I that I'm all for. Like I I don't think that um I'm not sure that academics are are there yet. Um the problem is so the problem with something like that is that school districts uh from my perspective. Well, not just that, then what winds up happening is that they enjoy the savings of money that they're getting by throwing a computer in front of the students, so then it becomes all in, right? So it doesn't just become the kids that are really good at being able to learn that way. Then that becomes a dumping ground for others, and then you you're back to square one, and nobody's getting the hell right now.

SPEAKER_00 24:48

Don't we have enough evidence where it doesn't work anyway? Well, what doesn't work? That technology doesn't work with education as much as we thought it would.

SPEAKER_02 24:56

Yeah, but it's not stopping people. No, I know not fast enough.

SPEAKER_00 24:58

But there's enough no, there's enough evidence where when kids started using technology. Oh, it went down a hundred percent.

SPEAKER_02 25:04

Yeah, there is, but it's not unfortunately That's not doing anything. It's not translating into changes fully in practice yet.

SPEAKER_00 25:12

Oh, really? Because they already invested.

SPEAKER_02 25:15

Parents I'm seeing there is a very deep divide between um parents of of and again, I only speak for me, and this is actually I speak more as a parent, not even as a special education teacher when I say this. I um I'm seeing that parents of those tier one kids, the ones that get it on that first delivery of instruction, the ones that can hear the lecture once and then get an A on the test because they'll do whatever they need to do on their own or you know, whatever at home to get there, um, they don't want. They want that quick production and that like, you know, okay, well, good, that'll leave more room for another honors class or another, do you know what I'm saying? So they don't want that to disappear as well. Like they want it to disappear theoretically, but the translation of that and what that looks like for productivity and all of that is is something that they sort of can't, they can't marry it.

SPEAKER_00 26:18

I gotcha, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 26:19

Do you know do you understand what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 26:21

Right, yeah. I think I think we got fool fooled by um like people saying if you don't use technology, you're gonna fall back. Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 26:28

I agree with you a hundred percent. And I also think the pandemic really messed us up because it took us all in right away. Right, and it's not a fair and the blurred, and there were such blurred lines.

SPEAKER_00 26:40

It still is like what caused the the the you know de-escalating of the lot of blurred lines. You don't know if it's just the no, you don't, yeah, or if it was the pandemic, you know, right you don't.

SPEAKER_02 26:53

So I I it's it's yeah, that's a that's a so uh in that respect I feel like AI scares me a little bit. Or techno not AI. AI, I think, is fantastic if it's used, you know, the correctly. Um but but the compu the technology aspect of school, right? That's what I should say. Not the AI, the whole entire thing. It's it's too I I feel as though it um and not because I feel teachers are being replaced, that's not why. Because I feel kids are checking out. And because there's not enough people in front of them to say, hey, come back.

SPEAKER_00 27:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 27:28

You know, like hello. Yeah, there's not enough of that.

SPEAKER_00 27:32

I don't yeah. And as far as like teachers being replaced, I I don't think that's the goal, or people think that I think teachers are gonna be able to enjoy their job more. Like, like, like that, that's how I see AI with a lot of these tricks.

SPEAKER_02 27:48

But you know what's funny?

SPEAKER_00 27:49

They're just gonna have to adjust.

SPEAKER_02 27:50

But you know what's funny? I I just had a conversation with somebody this morning who became a teacher in the last, I'd say, 10 years, probably less than 10 years. So they don't know life before computers, right?

SPEAKER_00 28:04

Being a teacher, the overhead projector.

SPEAKER_02 28:06

Right. They don't know, they don't they don't know what it was like to stand to stand there with the mimeograph and run off your copies and have the black ink all over your hands because you literally had to do this and it was the triplicate. Remember that? Like when I first started, that's where you made your copies.

SPEAKER_00 28:24

Look, I was a film photographer. I used to be.

SPEAKER_02 28:26

Yeah, exactly. But um, so I I said to her, I know I know what it I know what both worlds look like, right? So um I didn't mind going home and grading papers.

SPEAKER_03 28:42

Right.

SPEAKER_02 28:43

I didn't mind doing bulletin boards. Yeah, I didn't, I don't I I still like my manual grade book. Like I literally still walk around my class. I mean, I don't have that kind of class anymore because my students don't do traditional homework like that. But up until I came to where I am right now, which was only three years ago, I had a grade book, like an old school with the lines and the, you know, you put your name in the column and you wrote across and you took I I documented everything in those books. So I am not afraid of the work. I I liked that. What worries me about the replacement of those types of things is that now what I'm seeing is that teachers that are coming in, and again, it's not all across the board, they don't want to go home and do that extra work.

SPEAKER_00 29:36

Yeah, no, I got you.

SPEAKER_02 29:37

So they don't want to do the work, they want at three o'clock to clock out, and they'll work like an after-school program if they have to for money and stuff like that. But like back in my day, the parking lot did not empty out until easily four o'clock.

SPEAKER_03 29:54

Right.

SPEAKER_02 29:55

We got out at 2 45, you stayed, you cleaned your classroom, you set up for the next day, you made your photo copies, you graded some papers, and then you went home at 4 o'clock.

SPEAKER_03 30:06

Right.

SPEAKER_02 30:07

Now I'm not kidding you when I tell you I pull into the parking lot. Do you know that there are teachers who get there early because they have to for parking where I am? You have to get there early, and they sit in their car.

SPEAKER_03 30:19

Right.

SPEAKER_02 30:20

They don't go inside. Yeah, no, I got you. They literally sit in their cars until they have to. And then as soon as that bell rings, oh my goodness, it is like a mass exit. It's like the end of Greece where they're like, school, it's funny for summer, like it's like gone.

SPEAKER_00 30:41

I've lived one minutes of fucking. I was the second house from my like fourth grade school. Right. It was awesome, right? But I remember forgetting my book and going like a half hour later, teacher. I used to knock on a window and a classroom. The teacher would would uh answer it.

SPEAKER_02 30:56

It's not like that anymore. And and unfortunately, new teachers are coming in and seeing that and assuming that that's the norm. But the problem is I can leave at three o'clock and do my work and get my stuff done, and my grades are done the way that they're supposed to, and my I don't miss deadlines, and my reports are really good, and that's just who I am. Um, but it took me a hell of a long time to get there. Like I'm almost 30 years in. Like you can't graduate last year, come in in a class of 25 and think you're going home at 3 o'clock, coming back the next you know, day without doing anything at home first. It's just not feasible.

SPEAKER_00 31:34

When you're when you're in any career for a long time, you kind of know what you can get away with. Exactly, and what you can push. Right, absolutely. It's it's just all that.

SPEAKER_02 31:42

But that's a learned thing. Oh no, I'm sure. That shouldn't be like, and that's what I'm saying. So I worry that those other types of automated things are giving a false sense of readiness.

SPEAKER_00 31:55

Right, no, I gotcha. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 31:57

Yeah, like that you you you think you're ready. Like it blows my mind that in our town the teachers walk in the same exact time as the students. Did you know that? No, no, like school starts for them almost the exact same time. I don't know how a teacher walks in and has kids lined up outside their classroom and isn't stressing out. Like, I need to put I need to put my bags down. I need to turn my lights on.

SPEAKER_00 32:24

My son works for the Daisy camp in East Brunswick, and uh we're down a car right now because there was an accident, so um, I have to drive on the work. So and he gets it. I'm like, yeah, like well, first work started at nine. I went in there for 845. I didn't know that. I thought work started at 845. I said, just just get there, you know, like seven minutes before seven minutes before eight forty-five.

SPEAKER_02 32:48

Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 32:50

Just be there earlier because I I'm training them. I'm training them like most people show up right at work and they're not ready to work at 845. They're ready. I said, I said, you you're gonna put such an impression on people that even if you screw up other things, the fact that you're early every day, our generation's gonna appreciate it. And he gets it. It's like just walk in. Late is unacceptable. Yeah, go walk in, you know, when you're older, make a cup of coffee, like relax, unwine.

SPEAKER_02 33:19

Early is on time.

SPEAKER_00 33:21

I see him here in front of my office. Late is unacceptable. That they don't start till nine. I see them sitting in our car at 8 55. Like they don't wanna. That's because the the the managers and the bosses Well, they don't want to work any more than they have to, and I think that's weird.

SPEAKER_02 33:33

Life doesn't work that way.

SPEAKER_00 33:34

No, but I I think if your employees are coming in, let them put their bag down, let them let them turn on the computer. I agree with you. I I I think sometimes managers and bosses, come on, let's go in a meeting real quick.

SPEAKER_02 33:44

Right, I don't I don't like that either. I had a principal who was like that. I mean, we actually had a contract written around my principal because she had an 8 a.m. meeting every day of the week except Friday, and literally they were it's it was too much.

SPEAKER_03 33:55

Right.

SPEAKER_02 33:56

So I yeah, there is a you know, there is a happy medium. However, I I I agree with you. I don't think that I don't agree that teachers should be walking in the same exact time as students. Like, yeah, I don't think teachers should be setting their classroom up for the day with the kids in front of them.

SPEAKER_00 34:11

Right, no, exactly.

SPEAKER_02 34:12

I don't think that's a good look. No, no, no. I really don't. I think it's unprofessional.

SPEAKER_00 34:16

And they're learning that's how it's done, too.

SPEAKER_02 34:17

It's like a last minute hurry, you know, and it also to me it's to me, it translates into a lack of value in their time because you're wasting their time by setting up. And I don't like that.

SPEAKER_00 34:32

Yeah, it's like it's like going to a personal trainer to work out and they're and they're first setting up your stuff, like or they're having you to stretch to stretch out for the first 15 minutes or the thing. Yeah, I don't like that either. Right.

SPEAKER_02 34:45

I you're that's a great, yeah, great comparison.

SPEAKER_00 34:48

Now now on the topic of uh AI, are we ready for an AI boyfriend, or how did the dating go?

SPEAKER_02 34:55

So um I texted you afterwards and I said to you she was upset I didn't call right away, but I was in the middle of my AI. I wasn't upset, I was surprised. Well, I didn't I was surprised, but it wasn't an immediate response.

SPEAKER_00 35:10

There was a lot of phone call response. There was a lot of ADHD thinking going on. I was like, do I want to call into the city? No, no, yeah, I did. I I felt a little like is this my boundaries? Like, oh no, totally. You were all in, man. You were all in. So I wasn't so that it was it was I was thinking. All right, I respect that. Thank you.

SPEAKER_02 35:33

But no, you're in. You're in it, Mizan. Like we can't get out now.

SPEAKER_00 35:36

With the dating stuff, I don't like uh getting involved unless I'm really invited.

SPEAKER_02 35:41

Like, you know, I well, speaking of invitations, yeah, yeah, go ahead. There was some RSVPing without an invitation sent on our date. Oh, to put it, you know, um mildly. So I said to you, I texted you immediately afterwards, it was a 6.5 to 7 out of 10. So it wasn't horrendous.

SPEAKER_00 36:05

Right, right. Sounded pretty horrendous to me.

SPEAKER_02 36:08

It was No, it wasn't horrendous.

SPEAKER_00 36:12

Anytime you have to keep your hands in your pocket. Well, okay, so that's the problem.

SPEAKER_02 36:16

So we had talked originally that I knew there was gonna be a little bit of a boundary pushing because of the love bombing text. Yeah, I saw that.

SPEAKER_00 36:26

I saw some of that.

SPEAKER_02 36:27

So I was prepared for that. But I don't think I I uh yeah, I wasn't prepared for the extra blurred lining that was going on. Um we met for coffee, um, which he said dinner, I said coffee, um brunch, whatever, um, which was fine uh for the first one. He he came local to me, which was also Philly area.

SPEAKER_00 36:54

Oh, I think it's too far anyway.

SPEAKER_02 36:56

Uh well it is far, but I was okay, whatever. You know, uh okay. And um we're just not on the same wavelength, I guess. Like um the conversation was okay, and again, not much about me, which was interesting because in the tax, he's right and actually in the beginning of the conversation, I was asking him about his career and like what he does. I was very interested, he was a lawyer in the Yeah, it was an interesting right. So I was like, and he even made a comment which I was actually impressed with, and he said, I'll answer this, but then I want to hear about you. The problem was the hearing about me and me never happened.

SPEAKER_00 37:39

That's so funny.

SPEAKER_02 37:40

So it was interesting in that way. Um and then, like, there was a lot of like walking around and just sort of um killing time, which I was okay with. You know, you'd be okay with if it was somebody who you were really, really interested in the conversation and that kind of thing. So it it I wasn't, and uh he may have been. I think you're pretty good at I am good at small talk if I have to, even though I hate it.

SPEAKER_00 38:07

Did you help me out with this podcast, especially in the beginning? Like you're good at carrying the conversation.

SPEAKER_02 38:11

Yeah, so I think that's kind of what I did actually. I do that's actually a great way to say it. Um I carried probably a lot of the conversation. Not because I wanted to, but because it wasn't coming back when I would let when I would let go. Yeah. You know?

SPEAKER_00 38:28

Um but you're good at filling that in, is what I'm saying. You're very good at that.

SPEAKER_02 38:32

But but yeah, the hand like so so I never once gave you said something that was so important. You said I I back then you never what did you say? I never did something unless I felt I was given permission.

SPEAKER_00 38:47

Like women if you're walking, they'll they'll just like touch. Right, or your hand will be close enough where it's like they will. They they'll do that. Uh they'll they'll they'll let you know.

SPEAKER_02 38:57

I'm I'm very, I'm a very I've been on so many dates. I really have. I've I've I told you that not in a long time, but I was back then. So I've met a lot of different types of men to know, to be able to gauge pretty quickly whether or not this is somebody. And honestly, I'm gonna be honest with you, I'm gonna be honest with you. Uh if I can picture myself kissing that person when I first meet them, then it will if I can't, it's over. Yeah, no, I got you. That's my gauge right away. Like if I can literally visualize myself kissing that person, I can go further.

SPEAKER_03 39:32

Right.

SPEAKER_02 39:33

I knew right away that that wasn't something that was, you know, there. So I know for a fact that never once did I give permission for anything more than a casual conversation. All of them. Very, very casual. Well, we at one point we're like crossing the street and he goes to grab my hands to walk me carefully across the street. And I I you know, I don't mind, I don't want to be a bitch because.

SPEAKER_00 40:08

If this is a real, they're gonna think you're a bitch. I'm gonna make it one.

SPEAKER_02 40:11

So just No, but I get it. And I don't like I and I No, I I know what you're saying. Uh so I I not the first date. Please hear me out. Like chivalry, I'm all about chivalry. I am, and I do believe it's dead in a lot of ways, and I don't I do believe that you know, there are I'm traditional in a lot of those ways.

SPEAKER_00 40:29

You gotta earn it though, right?

SPEAKER_02 40:31

Yeah, like and and I had to give you permission to enter that space, right?

SPEAKER_00 40:35

Like I totally respect that.

SPEAKER_02 40:37

And also, right off the bat, you don't know me, and you're trying to save me.

SPEAKER_00 40:42

Right, right.

SPEAKER_02 40:43

So that's something that whoa, that's a little boundary pushing for me. Like, we're crossing the street in we're not in Manhattan, like we were in New Brunswick, and it was a crosswalk.

SPEAKER_00 40:56

Then Rachel goes, I I work in Jersey City, I know how to cross the street.

SPEAKER_02 40:59

I did. I said, I said thank you, but I I work in Jersey City and I cross much worse streets than this. Like, not at the crosswalk while cars are beeping at me and stuff. So like that was the first thing. And then I carried on with the date. It was okay. And I was able to thankfully, you know, sort of cut it a little shorter than he he actually when we first got there. He was like, Oh, I have an extra half hour. I was like, I don't. I'm sorry. I I um and um this was this was the kicker of the actual boundaries, and then I'll tell you why, really, overall, I don't think that it would have worked and what I've learned about myself, yeah, and what I need. Um, and then we're leaving, and he was very nice, and he was he very nice, and he walked me back to where my car was parked, and he went in for a hug, which is fine, okay, right? It was a I thought a casual hug. And then when I went to let go, he goes, No, I want a real hug.

SPEAKER_00 42:04

So cringy.

SPEAKER_02 42:06

And he went all in. I couldn't get out, and I actually did one of these, you know, like the the pat on the back, like to try and be like, dude, like we're on we're not on the same page right now. Like, yeah, you know, step back a little bit and um get any cues. Well, I think he that might have been it. Well because right before the hug, he said to me, Oh, I really would love a second date. And I sort of kind of was able to get out of that. I I don't think I said no, but like I I sort of was able to get around that, and then the hug came, and then I think my bot I definitely tend to stop. Like, there's no doubt about it. Like my body language, without a doubt, did not say, Come on in. And um, I think I all but ran. I think I literally think I all but ran after that, and he did not think again, and I'm gonna say this as a woman to any women out here who are listening. It was on an app. I would suggest not giving your phone number out until after the second date. Like I strictly kept this on the app. Yeah, and I am so glad because it was an easy, he didn't reach out to me again. So I didn't have to, I wouldn't have ghosted him, I would have explained that we're on different page. And this is where I'm gonna tell you why I truly, aside from the boundary breaking, he was single, never married, which is fine. I am also um, no kids, which again is fine. Yeah, um, it does make life easier, you know, and as far as baggage or you know, whatever, a past or anything like that. But it makes it hard for people who don't have kids to understand that with all due respect you will never be number one.

SPEAKER_00 43:54

Right, right, right.

SPEAKER_02 43:56

Right? So, like, um, I can love you until the day. I die, but my kids, you're not their father. And they are number one no matter what. So at one point we were talking about my dog, and then he said that he had a dog that died in 2019. And um I said, Did you ever think about getting another dog? And he was like, Yeah, I did. He was like, But um, you know, I kind of like not, you know, not being tied down.

SPEAKER_00 44:24

Oh God.

SPEAKER_02 44:27

I'm thinking I got twins. Right. Like if you won't tie yourself down to a dog, yeah, this isn't, you know, we we might have some problems here at some point or another. So um that for me kind of was the you know, that was like the line, and then the hug, the hug herd round the world was that was it.

SPEAKER_00 44:48

Alright, you don't want to talk about how you got scared of the train?

SPEAKER_02 44:53

I wanted to leave him with some dignity.

SPEAKER_00 44:56

That's okay, you can. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't want to do that. We won't talk about how you got scared of it.

SPEAKER_02 45:01

What I will say about without saying that, I will say that I have learned about myself what I need in a man. And I we did talk about last week how I said, I don't want somebody to treat me like shit, but I need a level of cool.

SPEAKER_00 45:18

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 45:19

I need an edge. Right, yeah. The person has to have an edge. Otherwise, it can even be a nerdy edge. It doesn't have to be an edge, but there has to be a sarcasm or a a coolness to you. Like it's I don't even know what's how to explain it. It's it's not something that you can banter. Yeah, and and and it and it's not a look. Like, I mean, when I think about like I'm trying to think right now, if there's a star or somebody that I can tell you wouldn't necessarily you would think that there's like an edge, but like he's an edge. Like um, I can't even think about it, but yeah, it's been fun.

SPEAKER_00 45:59

No, because well, I love him.

SPEAKER_02 46:01

I love him too, but he's even more cool than I would even think to say somebody who has an edge but doesn't look like they have an edge. Um I mean, he's really, really funny anyway, but like um what was his name? Um the guy who well you would you didn't watch Friends. Um DeF John Defra Defra De Favre, or what's his name? Um yeah yeah yeah. Like you wouldn't look at him and think that he's what was his name? He was the guy that was in he does all those shows, like he movies, he was in swing was he in swingers with Vince Vaughn. He's friends with him. So you look at somebody like him, and he's like a big Columpa teddy bear, but but he's got an edge, right? Yeah, and he's got a coolness to him.

SPEAKER_00 46:47

Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_02 46:49

Like there's a I can't yeah.

SPEAKER_00 46:51

There's a quirkiness that's fine. Yeah, yeah. I gotcha.

SPEAKER_02 46:55

Yeah, so it it has to be something like that, otherwise you're not gonna keep my attention.

SPEAKER_00 46:59

Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 47:01

So it's not some it's not a look. It's a attitude.

SPEAKER_00 47:05

It's an attitude.

SPEAKER_02 47:06

It's not a look, it's an attitude. It's it's it's a way that you carry. Yeah, it's I guess it's a way that you carry yourself.

SPEAKER_00 47:11

Yeah, not everybody has that. No. You know, it's hard.

SPEAKER_02 47:15

A lot of people So you think I'm gonna be alone forever?

SPEAKER_00 47:18

No, I just think it's um I don't know what it is. I I think a lot unattainable. I think a lot of guys, um I think a lot of guys like like just from what you told me, what you told everybody here, it's like what I outed to the world, while am I doing it? There's no way that this guy has female friends.

SPEAKER_02 47:37

Well, I I I agree with you, and I would I would have to agree with you.

SPEAKER_00 47:41

Like, like I know this just and I don't have a lot of Do you think that that's part of it? Like you should have female friends, like to have like like should or shouldn't, I don't know, but I I'm just saying like Do you think that makes people I don't have a lot of female friends, but I would know that's not the right strategy to to be successful with a woman. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_02 48:01

Like like like I like I I like You may not have a lot of female friends now because you're married and you've been married for a really long time, but back before you were married, did you have a lot of casual female friends throughout your life?

SPEAKER_00 48:15

And you have sisters, yeah, but they were much older. You can't even count that.

SPEAKER_02 48:20

I think that I did you have female friends who shared their dating act, like a little bit, yeah, a little bit.

SPEAKER_00 48:27

But also what was my strength is if I was rejected, I I didn't care. Like, like meaning like I would still see at the bar and have a drink with you.

SPEAKER_02 48:35

Like, well, you I'm like that too. I'm very much like that as well. Yeah, I get that.

SPEAKER_00 48:39

So I the thing you realize it's like uh oh then that's intriguing because that's like an edge, you know what I mean? But you know, like I would I was okay with like I don't know, yeah. I always had some type of uh um I would I wouldn't call them friends, I would call them acquaintances. Right, right, right. Because back then when I was single, there was no texting or phones. Uh you know you didn't really talk to the city. So you didn't have no but I had kind of connections. But I hung I I lived by Seabright, I was in a community, and so you would see the same people over and over again. And uh so I had those acquaintances and friends and just joking around and but just just by communicating with the opposite sex, you just develop uh you just develop some um knowledge of what's corny and what what's stupid. I mean like I don't I don't know. It's just for me it's obvious. Just like be yourself, like that's that's trying to sound really crazy.

SPEAKER_02 49:33

Well for you it's obvious, but here's the thing like for me, for you flirting is obvious. For me, flirting is not, yeah. So maybe it's similar for the man to like not know that this is cringy. Like, don't grab my hands. They've been in my pockets the entire time. Like, never once were my. True, and mine were definitely not. Um, but even still, even if you get point to pass that point, like again, I said to you last week, like when you start that high up and then we meet, like you don't know whether or not we're gonna match. So like you've now thought we're like riding off into the sunset.

SPEAKER_03 50:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 50:20

I'm not even I'm not even outside with you yet.

SPEAKER_00 50:23

Like you're you know, you're but you shouldn't be outside with you. Well, right. Right, right. So it's it's not like it's the eighth day and you're indecisive.

SPEAKER_02 50:30

I mean So what does that like I don't think that's a man like I think there are probably women who do that too, right? Start right off the bat as though they've skipped right through you know, one through four tapes.

SPEAKER_00 50:43

They'll get their way. You know what I mean? Like they'll Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 50:46

Yeah, I I mean I would imagine See, but again, I don't have that kind of game, so I don't I'm not man like to me that's slightly manipulative. Like I don't have that manipulation inside of me.

SPEAKER_00 50:55

Yeah, so I said women look for potential. Women tend to look for potential while men tend to look for physical attraction. Right. Okay, 100%. Women often evaluate future potential in predominantly ambitions.

SPEAKER_02 51:09

Wait, repeat that again. Sorry, I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_00 51:11

Women also off women often evaluate a man's future future potential and ambitions while men often place more emphasis on physical attraction. So yeah.

SPEAKER_02 51:21

That's so funny. You know what that makes me think of Judge Judy. I love Judge Judy, and she used to say, um, beauty fades, but dumb is forever.

SPEAKER_00 51:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 51:30

Because like these men would be attracted to these women, like they in her, like uh, you know, some of the cases that would come in front of her, it would be like, or women and men, and like either the man was really hot and the woman fell for it and gave him like all her money, and then he like ran away and cheated on her, or the other way around, and then there she's like, Well, beauty fades, but dumb is forever.

SPEAKER_00 51:49

Like, I always find it interesting, and it happens more often than I can imagine. So butter faces, no, so I always been attracted to people my age or a little older. Oh, me too. But to this day, me too. But like when I see Me too. If I see a a very quote Me too, I'm putting this in air quote hot 35 years, I don't find them hot. Okay, I find them pretty. Like I I I look at them as a fucking kid. Like you do, 35? Yeah, I do. Like, isn't that true? Interesting. Yeah, 35. Yeah, yeah, I like I I truly do. But when I see an attractive 55 year old, I'm like, holy fuck.

SPEAKER_02 52:26

Like, like, like, so like Now let me ask you when you were 35.

SPEAKER_00 52:31

I like them a little older. A little bit, yeah. Like, like, but when I was 35, I liked 35 years old. I didn't like 25 years. Right. Like, like I always like me too.

SPEAKER_02 52:40

I've always dated older.

SPEAKER_00 52:41

But I always like my age, though. Like, I actually like my age. Like, I don't even know.

SPEAKER_02 52:46

I um you've always liked your age.

SPEAKER_00 52:48

Yeah. Or a little older. Like when I was 20, I like I liked the 40 year olds when I was like 25.

SPEAKER_02 52:53

I owe most of my I told you last week, most of the people that I dated are have been older than me. And that's normal though for a woman.

SPEAKER_00 52:59

That's yeah, oh, it is? Yeah, yeah. Women tend to go five. We'll go five to ten years older. But uh interesting. But what I'm saying is like I know people my age and they're like, oh she's like they'll be attracted to like a 25-year-old. I I don't, I fucking like and I'm not I'm not trying to sound like this great normal.

SPEAKER_02 53:17

No, no, no, no, I know.

SPEAKER_00 53:18

Because I'm very heterosexual. No, I'm just gonna be like, but I just fucking like it's well do you feel like it's dating your kid's friend? Is it that? I just don't know why. I think there's like an insecurity by the guy. I don't there's something fucking psychologically wrong, I think, when you like somebody 20 years younger.

SPEAKER_02 53:36

Oh you know, we're gonna get shit for that.

SPEAKER_00 53:38

Yeah, I know I do. Like, it's just it really is Bob's getting shit. It's not me this time. No, but it's it is really strange. It it really like it, it actually bothers me. And this isn't like me being a good guy, or instead, like it's just fucking it bothers me. Like I like don't even like entertain me with like it's like dude, like what's your fucking problem? I don't know. I I think I'm in the minority. I think you are also actually. I do think you're in the minority. I I love what he's doing.

SPEAKER_02 54:08

Here's why I think it is though.

SPEAKER_00 54:10

I think I know why 65-year-olds, and I'm like, holy fucking.

SPEAKER_02 54:13

Well, first of all, first of all, the people our age and a little bit older have taken a lot more than women, more than women. The women are in pretty good shape. They're having a lot of grow-ups right now, and yes, I do agree with that. Um, but I I I I find for you though, I think one of the reasons that is with the coming. No, not at all, is because you like intellectual conversation. Yeah, I do. Or younger, no offense. Right. I'm not, it's just a life, it comes with life experience. Being able to add to conversations that you like to participate in comes with life experience that young people do not have.

SPEAKER_00 55:02

It's so funny you say that because there's a friend of mine that you may or know or not. Um, like we have the just these discussions, and uh, and uh we're talking about like some people he dated or one person he dated. And I would go, I don't know how the fuck she's the fucking dumbest person.

SPEAKER_02 55:19

God forbid. I know I say that.

SPEAKER_00 55:20

I I've said that he goes, Yeah, I know that's important to you. It's not important to me. Yeah, but like I I like I Oh no, I know people, I know guys.

SPEAKER_02 55:30

I've had conversations with some of my guy friends and been like, What it what what was it?

SPEAKER_00 55:35

But but he came into the next level, like I can't even have them in my life. Well uh like like like it's just no, I understand. Like, what the fuck you talk about?

SPEAKER_02 55:44

I mean, I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 55:45

Oh god.

SPEAKER_02 55:46

I have to tell you, I act I mean, listen, the guys that I've dated in my life, I I are probably very nice people overall, right? I mean, I know they are because I wouldn't have dated them. But with all due respect, so you just yeah, you corrected me. I said intellectual, and you're right. It's not an intellectual level, it's more EQ.

SPEAKER_00 56:05

It's got an unemotional intellectual.

SPEAKER_02 56:08

On an emotional, what did you say?

SPEAKER_00 56:11

If you talk to me, definitely get well yeah, you know.

SPEAKER_02 56:15

I it is it's an emotional, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's an emotional intellectual level, right? Like it's being on the same emotional level.

SPEAKER_03 56:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 56:24

Yes. Because actually there, I I they probably a couple of them maybe intellectually were smarter than me on like an IQ, like an academic IQ thing. But they just couldn't have convers like, yeah, like they they couldn't get conversations.

SPEAKER_00 56:42

I would do if I if I was dating, I would ask the woman, what were the last five books you read? Then that would decide if I would go on a date with them or not.

SPEAKER_02 56:49

What if they said none?

SPEAKER_00 56:50

I would not date. I would definitely not date on it. Really? Oh, god no. God no.

unknown 56:56

Fucking no way.

SPEAKER_02 56:57

Wait, but I haven't really completed many books.

SPEAKER_00 57:00

Oh, well, you you you're not going to be able to do that.

SPEAKER_02 57:01

So hold on. If I answer that, it would be right now I'm reading that remarkable creature's be about the octopus.

SPEAKER_00 57:08

Right.

SPEAKER_02 57:09

That's Sally Field, the movie, because I want to see the movie. Whatever. Before that, it was the grit. I actually that's not true. Right before that, I wrote I read Dogs, Um, Boys, and Other Things I've Cried About.

SPEAKER_00 57:21

Okay, that's good.

SPEAKER_02 57:22

That was right recent right before this one. But did it say that? And then before that it was Grit, the Grit book.

SPEAKER_00 57:27

Uh that's good.

SPEAKER_02 57:28

And then before You almost read Give and Take. I'm still reading Give and Take. I just got to see.

SPEAKER_00 57:34

So that would be a sum-up.

SPEAKER_02 57:35

And then the last one that I read, what was the last one that I read to fruition? You know, it's probably been a year since I read a book.

SPEAKER_00 57:47

Well, that's okay. From cover to cover. It should have been five years ago. I mean, I'm not saying an avid reader.

SPEAKER_02 57:52

Anderson, I mean, I I read it, I read I read Anderson Cooper. Oh, that's that's a big one.

SPEAKER_00 57:56

That would be a good one. But it's not Sammy Moore's, I read her bo autobiography. But you understand what I'm saying? Like I think that's uh because then just from the books Well, you're right also, just to take time to read is is in it in and of itself is still read. Well, I'll know if I can have those conversations with them.

SPEAKER_02 58:13

But also just the fact that somebody reads books is telltale.

SPEAKER_00 58:17

Yeah, yeah. What's your favorite podcast? Okay, and if they say Joe Rogan, I might not be like I I like Joe Rogan, but I don't know if that's the first one that comes out of your mouth. Right, right. Right.

SPEAKER_02 58:28

But if it's what would be what would blow you away if somebody out loud, out loud, Robin Rachel.

SPEAKER_00 58:34

No, if it was like a Bill Maher, because you know, because I know they're they're into like people that critically think Anderson Cooper, um, you know, and see some of the funny ones is fine, you know what I mean? Like the Theo Vans of the world or whatever. I don't know if you like that stuff. And uh uh but you get it you get a good three or four or or then to say I don't listen to podcasts, I'd be like, oh, okay, that's uh because a lot of people don't.

SPEAKER_01 59:00

A lot of people do not listen to podcasts. A lot of people, yeah, yeah. Like a lot of people.

SPEAKER_00 59:05

And if you don't like a show like Seinfeld, that would be a that that would be a red flag to me. Like that's a good one for me because that yeah, if you don't like Seinfeld, then I that I'm probably not gonna get along with you.

SPEAKER_01 59:18

What if they said they never watched Seinfeld?

SPEAKER_00 59:21

Yeah, no. Yeah, no. That's yeah, that would be tough.

SPEAKER_02 59:26

What if they said I don't know who Seinfeld is? That would be like a young person, probably would say they don't know who Seinfeld is.

SPEAKER_00 59:32

I would have all this on my profile though. Would you? If you don't watch Seinfeld.

SPEAKER_02 59:36

Oh, you would write that in a profile. Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 59:39

Just cut because I I think for people who connect with what I'm saying would find it very intriguing.

SPEAKER_02 59:44

Is it wrong? I mean, do you think that people I don't know, like I'm thinking about how I go through the profiles and sometimes I don't even like I read their stats first before I even read their responses, and then I'm stats?

SPEAKER_00 1:00:00

What's the stuff?

SPEAKER_02 1:00:00

You know, like where they're from and whether or not they want kids and if they're divorced, and even the the way they look. And then I'll swipe left before I even read their responses to some of their things. Yeah, so I mean I I'm wondering if that's like a shallow thing to do. Like I'm curious to see what other people do. Again, I'm I I I in my I've this is new for me in my 50s. Um it's a very interesting arena to be in now.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:29

There's a book by Mala Maccolum Gladwell up there called Blink, and Blink is about by the time it takes you to blink, your intuition, your gut, that gut feeling, I forgot what percentage it is, it's like 90% right. Really? Yeah, so that by the time you blink, you know, it's such a such a good thing. But then it gives you good examples when it was really, really wrong. You know what I mean? Like that 10%, and when it's wrong, it's wrong, you know. But yeah, it's the blink is a really Maccolum Gladwell. Are you familiar with him? He wrote like the tipping points and all that. Really, really.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:03

You know, it's so funny. I just went off on an ADHD thought, which is very funny. And you said, like, you know, that like the the blink, like the second, and it made me go back to I've we've talked about the movie sliding doors with Gweneth Paltro, how it was like that instinct where she made the train and one thing happened, and it shows the parallel about when she made the train and then when she didn't make the train, how her life was completely different. And I I just thought about this morning. I was on the way here and I was going to stop at the Dunkin' Donuts on Route 18, right? And but there, I I literally had my blinker on and I was ready to nobody calls it a blinker anymore. I just thought about that. What do they call it? A signal, whatever. And um, I literally was ready to pull in and the line was around the building. So I was like, oh, screw it, no way. And I pulled back out and I went to the turquoise bakery. And when I went to turquoise bakery, I saw this amazing, first of all, turquoise bakery, if you don't know it in Marlboro, New Jersey. It is freaking amazing. Okay, and I got the banana bread latte because I follow Nicolette Brito, who is an influencer from the area. She's a stay-at-home mom, adorable kids, beautiful house, beautiful whatever. But aside from that, a really nice person, and boy, can she cook. That's why I follow her because she makes unbelievable recipes. But I'm pulling in today to turquoise because that's why I go there. She, you know, talked about it. And what do you know? But Nicolette Brito was pulling up right next to me and I couldn't let the opportunity slide. And I was like, I follow you. I thought I'm here because of you. She is the nicest person, wanted to buy me my latte. I wouldn't let her because I was buying things. We, you know, I like to bring things for Rob to taste here because I just do that stuff. So, but um, I just want to shout out because I find that you and I, you know, we come, we don't really not, we don't we do this because we enjoy it, right? And and whatever comes along with it, it's fantastic. And we love that you guys watch us and and all, but there are some people who bust their asses day in and day out to be influencers. And she does, man. I mean, she is vlogging her life in the morning, and she, and you gotta, you know, there are me people out there who will knock stay-at-home moms, and I have to tell you, I I think they're amazing. There's a there's a role for them. I hats off to you. She busts her ass making her own way while she's taking care of her kids, and she's she's got her daughter, you know, in the stroller and she's vlogging and she puts it together and she's editing her videos while her kids are playing with the water table. And I mean, we're all just out here trying to be us.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:43

Right.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:43

And I just want to say that I hats off to you. You're amazing, and you're just as beautiful in person inside and out as you as you are online. And I just think that anybody else out there trying to do something like we are, you know, hats off to you guys. It's there's enough success for everybody, right?

SPEAKER_00 1:03:59

Like I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:03

She should come on. I we would love to have her on. But I mean, just in general, like, yeah, it's not an easy space to break into, right? But there I I just amazing. And and it was wonderful meeting her. And I wish her the best success in the world. She deserves it. She seems like a really nice person. And anybody else who's out there just trying to bust their asses to do this crazy shit.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:24

I mean, good luck.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:26

And we support you. And, you know, have a great week, guys. See you next week. See you later, everyone. Bye bye.