From Lack to Expansion The Mindset Shift You Need for 2025 Goals

Are your goals for 2025 coming from a place of lack or expansiveness? In this episode of the Emotional Revolution Podcast, Kayla Burch dives deep into the mindset shift needed to set goals that truly align with your highest self. Learn how to:

• Recognize the toxic patterns of traditional goal setting.
• Set goals from a place of abundance and self-love.
• Break free from the stories and beliefs holding you back.
• Embrace radical honesty and take full responsibility for your success.

This is your guide to creating a vision for your life that excites and inspires you, without the pressure to prove anything to anyone else. Start your emotional revolution today and make 2025 the year you thrive.

🎯 Join the Goal Setting Workshop for deeper insights: https://www.kaylaburchcoaching.com/no_excuses_2025_goal_setting_workshop

Transcript

Kayla Burch (00:01)
Welcome back to the Emotional Revolution podcast. I'm Kayla Burch and I'm excited to bring you today's topic because I think it's something that is on most of our minds as we are ending 2024 and stepping into 2025. So we're talking about goal setting, but we're of course looking at it from a different angle because most people set goals because they feel something is missing in their life. But what I want to talk about today is starting from that place of lack is what is actually leading you to fail more often. So I want to kind of

dissect what that looks like and what that feels like. So we're going to dive in to how we can completely shift this idea and this place of generation to create the goals that we want. So the reason why traditional goal setting fails most often is because society teaches us that we have to set goals to fix ourselves. So we're oftentimes creating these goals that are based off of external validation of something that we need to have because we don't have it now. It is coming from a place of dis-

It is coming from a place of dissatisfaction with yourself. It's coming from a place of not liking something that's happening currently in your life. Now, I know what you're saying. It's like, yeah, Kayla, of course, I want more money. I want to live wealthy. I want to have a successful business. I want better relationships. I want all of those things. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. I get that. I hear that. But there is this subtle difference on how we generate our goals and where it comes from.

So when you're setting down to lay out your goals for 2025, if you're coming at it from a place of dissatisfaction for yourself or dislike, and you're overcompensating for something that you don't like within yourself, I promise you when you reach that goal, it's not going to feel good. It's not gonna feel as good as it could, I should say, because you're trying to overcompensate for something you dislike about your life now.

And so the way that we can shift this is one, we're gonna talk about goals today and how to set goals and how to meet those goals. But I wanna talk about what's really at the root of what drives you to set your goals and what that looks like for us. So we don't end up feeling unfulfilled or things just aren't good enough whenever we reach that because we're not addressing the thing that we actually want to address within us to begin with.

So this is a really powerful shift that we have. know for me, when I first started goal setting one, I didn't even know how to set goals. So I would love to just know, what's that like for you? When did you learn how to set a goal for yourself or have you even learned? Because it's something that requires skill, first of all, because most of the time what we're taught is that, like we've been talking about, you need to set this goal because you don't have something that you want.

or you're not good enough as is. And so we look at all the things we don't like about ourselves or all the things we don't like about our life or all these different things that we wanna change and it becomes a huge disruption. And then we're focused on all of these things that aren't good for us or are not good to us. And then we completely get disrupted. And so what does that actually look like for you? Me, I didn't know how to set a goal. I thought if I just slapped down, I wanted to make 5K or I wanted to have this or I wanted to have that.

that it would all come up and it was always from a place because I don't have it now. Because once I have that, I'll finally be able to prove that I'm successful. I'll finally be able to prove that I'm capable and I'm smart enough and blah, blah, blah. All the stories I told myself, it was all wrapped up into this external goal, this external outcome. And I could never reach it. Even when I got to that goal that I set for myself, it still didn't feel good.

because I didn't like myself, because I was still fighting something within myself. That's why this work is so important and it trickles into every area of our life, even wanting something different. And so this becomes this ebb and this flow and this balance of how can I enjoy what I have now, but also create the life that I'm envisioning, because we can still want more and different, but not at the expense of who we are today, not at the expense of I'm not good enough.

So once you come to terms with that, you are good enough, you are capable, and you start to change that relationship here, then that completely shifts how we step into that next evolution of our life. And what does that look like for you? Where are you setting goals? Are you setting goals because you're trying to prove something to somebody else or even to yourself? And to start to evaluate that because we can't fix ourselves. It's not about fixing ourselves through the goal.

It's about learning and changing our relationship with who we are today to be able to achieve those goals, right? By not hating ourselves and our lives and our current situation to get to that point. And so what motivates your goals? What's the thing that you want and how is that really pushing you into further self-hate, self-resentment, criticism for yourself? Because when we start from that place of lack,

We're going to continue to get lack, but when we start from a place of expansion, we think, I see this future version of myself and I can expand myself into that. I can step into that because I know that I can. I know that I'm capable and I see where I'm going. And maybe those little sticky steps along the way don't have to be absolutely perfect. But where I'm going is not from a place of I hate my life and myself today. It's

I know where I'm going is expansive and I'm expanding today to allow it to come in. So you may be thinking this is a little woo-woo. I just want to write my stuff on a piece of paper and then have the goal that I'm dreaming of. But that's just not simply how it works because I want you to really think about your life and every time you set those goals and maybe if you achieved them, did it feel good? Did you feel like you were from a place of lack? Did feel like you needed to do that? Did you need other people to praise you or were you happy when you got there?

Or was there always something else? And because that's the cosmic joke is that there really is always something else. Once we reach the next level, there's a new level, new level unlocked, let's go. But there's nothing wrong with that. It's the judgment we have along the way of, I should have been further or I could have done this faster. people aren't acknowledging me or appreciating me with what I'm doing.

Because we're not starting from a place of expansiveness. We're not allowing the journey to happen as it's supposed to happen. We're beating ourselves up along the way. We're losing focus. We're losing track of what can be because we're generating from a place of just not good enough today. Because the thing is where you're at today is fine. You can still see and want something different. We can push ourselves into that level.

But the more you push and the more you dislike who you are today, the further away you get from that goal you want. So what's already abundant in your life? What's already happening within your life? How can you already start and anchor into this feeling of abundance and expansiveness and what that looks like for you? And then how can you step into that next level? Now I can...

generate from a place of abundance today because I can see where I'm going. I can see that beautiful future version of me and I can allow myself to step into that without hate for who I am today, without generating from a place of I don't have, I'm not good enough. What can I get? How can I step into that? How would it look like if I did that with more joy and freedom and confidence? What's the aligned actions I need to take? So we look at our goal. So you look at your goals for 2025. Where do you want to be in December of 2025? Those are great.

Let's have places to focus. Let's have what feels like an outline, but we have to be willing to pivot. And if it doesn't happen exactly the way that we thought it was going to happen, we can't beat ourselves up. It can't be because we're not good enough or it can't be because we're trapped into our stories. Because the story of not being able to achieve your goals or keep putting the same who's who here as put the same freaking

goal, and vision, and wish on your vision board, time after time after time, year after year after year, you're still focusing on the same goals. What needs to change? Well, you need to change. You need to step into a version that welcomes what you want, not a version who doesn't think she's capable of having that. And that's what happens when we connect to our goals and create our goals from a place of lack.

is that we cannot see ourselves as that version who accomplished that goal. So we have to change that relationship with who we are today. We have to say, how can I become that version that I'm dreaming of and what does that look like today? So I have this goal where I wanna get to, you know, it could be an income goal, it can just be something else. And we have to evaluate why do I want that? And really ask yourself why you want that. Start to explore if it's something that you want to prove to somebody else. Start to explore if it's even aligned for you.

or if it's something that really does serve you, what is it? Where is it coming from? A lot of my goals were generated solely from a place of I wasn't good enough and I needed to prove that I was. And once I shift that narrative and I knew I was good enough, then I started hitting goal after goal after goal that I set for myself. Now, that does not mean that it went smoothly. It doesn't mean that I didn't have setbacks. It didn't mean that I didn't have to pivot. But it meant that since I wasn't trying to prove myself,

The pivot didn't hurt so bad. The shift wasn't that big of a deal because I was just moving with my life. I was just moving from an expansive state to be able to step into that future version of myself. And I allowed the challenges not to mean something about me. It didn't mean that, I knew it. I wasn't good enough. It didn't mean that. just meant I was moving towards a goal. And if I wanted to reach that goal, then I had to maybe shift. had to maybe.

pivot, had to learn what I needed to learn to get to where I wanted to go. But what happens is we get so caught up in that story and that breaking point and now it becomes a narrative. It becomes a meaning. It becomes something really meaningful about us and it just validates those stories. So what are you seeking? Are you looking at having somebody else validate you? Is this coming from a place of needing to prove? Because you're going to see this everywhere.

especially right now, you're going to be setting big goals and they're going to feel really good and you're not going to understand what gets in your way from achieving them because you don't one, know where they're being generated from and two, you're not looking at how it's going to hold you back. You're not looking at the ways that you're going to self-sabotage because you're not evaluating the stories alongside of that. And so I'll give you an example, like just keep expanding on what we're talking about is like when you set that goal for 2025 to make a certain income each month.

but then you don't believe that you're capable of that, then as soon as you get close or as soon as you get momentum, as soon as you start to feel that that goal is within reach, you'll sabotage it. Your subconscious mind is gonna come up and it's gonna say, we don't deserve this. So let's pull back, let's pivot, let's change, let's not do what we're doing to reach that. That was my MO, that was what I was known for, getting all that momentum.

But my subconscious mind, I hadn't addressed those stories that I told myself of not being capable, that I could never be successful. And so I derailed that success every time. So if you feel like you're a person who can't travel, if you feel like you're a person who isn't able to reach a certain level of wealth, then you'll always be that person who can't do it because your subconscious is going to come in and derail it. So you have to go, you have to do the deep work. It's uncomfortable. I didn't like it. I didn't like what I saw.

So when you do that, you have to say, what's coming up for me and how can I not judge it? And if I really want this to be different, how can I stop making excuses? How can I stop leaning into these stories? How do I stop making excuses for why I'm not where I want to be? And how could 2025 actually be a different year for me? What would that actually look like if I stepped into it in full embodiment of who I want to become by not hating who I am today? If you can just simply do that, I promise you'll break through your ceiling.

And because if you're looking at who you want to become by not hating who you are today, when something comes up and you don't like it, it's not comfortable. It's something that you actually want to shift in your awareness. You say, thank you for showing me that. Let me change it. Let me shift it. Let me stop acting in that way. And you can allow yourself to move forward. Now, that does not mean that that behavior, that habit is not going to arise again. But what it means is that it's not going to be such a sticking point the next time and the next time and the next time. And then before you know it,

It's not a sticking point at all. It's not even coming up for you. You've worked through it. Or when it does come up, it's just, wow, haven't done that in a while. We're always using it as a way to move us forward, but we have to start by not hating who we are today. And most goals are generated from a place of self-hate for your life, for yourself, for whatever. It's resentment. It's trying to prove something. It is just overcompensating for something you don't like about yourself. So before you set your goals for 2025 or go back and evaluate where they're at,

Ask yourself what you don't like about yourself today and why you need that goal. And allow that to be a mirror for a place for you to expand and grow. And instead of hating that version or suppressing it or pretending it's not there, what do I need to do? Do I need to gain a skill? Do I need to have more competence? What do I need to do in this area that maybe I don't feel as strong at? And it doesn't become something that is judgmental, it becomes a place of exploration.

And when you generate your goals from that place, you're unstoppable. There is no ceiling because each level becomes something you can celebrate and then say, great, I got here. What's my next level? And you just keep pushing and pushing, but not in a way because it's not good enough, but because the way it's fun and it's expansive and you're creating the life that you're envisioning by not hating your life today. Because I can promise you for the hundredth time, you're not going to get where you want to be by hating who you are today.

Change that relationship with who you are. Start to discover with what that looks like and feels like in your current state today. Allow that to come up. Allow that to flow through you. And when you start to generate from this place of self-love and liking yourself, and you start to generate from this place of expansiveness and not just by everything you don't have or who you're not today, then you start to step into who you're becoming and who you want to be in that future version of you. But that can't come from a place of contraction.

So just evaluate that. And when that judgment comes, I'm judging myself. How can I shift it? what would that look like? How can I continue to step into this future version of me? And then evaluate your goals. What is getting in my way? What will stop me? What is in my life? What has stopped me in the past? What has pulled me back? What has prevented me from moving into?

this goal or having this goal achieved because I likely it's another version of what you put on your goal list last year. So what stopped me last year and how do I actually make the commitment to not allow it to stop me this year? What's the story or the belief about myself that needs to be removed? Who am I blaming in my external world that is stopping me from getting this? Not that the person is stopping you from achieving this, but you are blaming somebody else and putting that responsibility into somebody else's hands.

You're stepping into radical honesty and responsibility and you're saying, I'm the only one who can change this. It's me. I want this goal. I want it so badly. I can feel it. And this is my year. No excuses. We're not busting into any excuses. You are stepping out of that. So I really want you to play around with this and just ask yourself where your goal is being generated. How can you shift them and what would that look like? It's such a powerful, powerful aspect. And I've...

creating a workshop specifically on this because it is such a huge issue with people setting goals. We have so much toxic like goal planning out there that is just push, push, push, push, push. And then once you don't achieve it, now you're the failure. But we're not looking at it like that. We're saying, why didn't I achieve the goal I set for myself this year? How did I get in my own way? What stopped me? It wasn't anyone else. It was me. So what was it? What can I do differently in 2025?

What does this look like? So I'll put the information for the workshop in the caption in the comment section so you can join if you want. you're listening to this after, then there'll be a replay. So something that's really powerful just to be able to dive into this and really start to explore it for yourself. It's something that's such a shift within us whenever we believe we can and we feel good with who we are today. So everything starts with changing that relationship to yourself. Everything starts with just

Allowing yourself to be open right because goal setting is about isn't about fixing yourself. You're not broken It's not about that. It's about seeing what needs to be seen and then stepping into that next version It's about creating a vision for your life that excites you that inspires you It's not something that pushes you down or makes you feel like you're not good enough that you You're not going to get your goal if you feel like you're not good enough to have that goal You want to feel?

open and expansive and inspired as you step into that next level, that next evolution, that next space in your business. What excites you? What inspires you? What lights you up? And what puts you in a place of, am good enough to have that. And if you don't feel that, because it happens so often, if you don't feel good enough to have what you're wanting to have, or you feel like your life or you're not meant to have it, then start to explore that and ask yourself and challenge it.

You're creating your own emotional revolution here. This is a part of the journey and you have to be willing to step into that and change that idea and that relationship in the way that you see yourself. You have to see yourself as the person who brings these things into your life, that you attract what you are looking for. It comes into your life because you believe it can, because you've changed the stories that limit it coming. You're not generating from a place of lack anymore.

you are generating from a place of expansiveness. And this is just the beginning. I have so much more that I could break down on this, but I just wanted to give you this like really short, like just nugget of inspiration so you can start goal setting from a place of wholeness, right? Not about breaking yourself down, not about feeling like you're not good enough, but just seeing the expansive nature, right? Seeing the potential. So your goals really do become an expression of your highest self.

It's not a desperate attempt to become someone you're not. It's not about proving to anyone else that you are capable. It's just an expression of who you are because you're allowing that to be. Right. So I'd love to just share, I would love for you to share your reflections on goal setting. Tag me on social media. Let me know what your goals are and what you're shifting and how you're creating this year from a place of that abundant nature instead of that contracted space of lack.

And if you are available and you want to join my workshop, then definitely check out all the information and I would love to see you there.