Rewire Your Student Mindset: From Self-Doubt to Smart Study with Sharon Olaniyi (Nigeria)

Doubt can start long before an exam, and that quiet defeat often decides the result. We sat down with Lady Sharon Holani—a Nigerian law student, tutor and mentor—to unpack the real drivers of academic focus: belief, aligned environments, and systems that make deep work possible. What began as a conversation about affirmations became a blueprint for building a focused identity that shows up on test day and in life.

Sharon shares how she moved from “I’m not capable” to consistent results by pairing daily affirmations with action—timed study blocks, active recall for case law, and weekly reviews. She explains why your inputs determine your output: friends who drain you, feeds that normalise failure, and media that stirs anxiety all tax attention. We talk practical boundaries—how to say no without drama, how to distance gently yet firmly, and how to replace noise with books and voices that fuel growth.

Mentorship threads it all together. “Follow who know road” is more than a saying; it’s a strategy. Sharon describes the mentors who saved her time and mistakes, and previews her programme for law students on studying smarter, not harder—memorising cases, extracting principles, and building the kind of focus that lasts. Along the way, we break the myth of marathon studying and show why short, deep focus sprints outperform long, distracted sessions.

If you’re ready to turn mindset into momentum, curate a healthier environment, and learn the study frameworks that actually stick, this conversation is your starting line. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs a boost, and leave a review—what’s the one belief you’ll change today?

Music, lyrics, guitar and singing by Dr Ariel Rosita King

Teach me to live one day at a time
with courage love and a sense of pride.
Giving me the ability to love and accept myself
so I can go and give it to someone else.
Teach me to live one day at a time.....

Chapters

• 1:14 Guest Introduction & Topic Setup
• 2:11 Defining a Focused Student’s Psychology
• 4:26 From Self-Doubt to Capability
• 5:56 Affirmations That Rewire the Brain
• 10:04 Environment, Toxicity, and Inputs
• 11:57 Breaking Free from Negative Circles
• 14:04 Youth, Negativity, and Alignment
• 17:45 Mentors: Follow Who Knows the Road
• 20:06 Study Smarter: Memorisation & Cases
• 22:40 Quality Over Hours: Focus Blocks
• 23:34 Final Mindset Takeaways & Closing

Transcript

Dr Ariel King: 0:37

Hello and welcome to another episode of The Business of Life with Dr. King. Today we have an extremely special guest, Lady Sharon Hollani. Welcome.

Sharon Olaniyi : 0:48

Thank you, um, I'm so happy to be with you here on this space. Really grateful.

Dr Ariel King: 0:54

Thank you. It's so great to be with you. Could you please introduce yourself to our audience?

Sharon Olaniyi : 1:01

All right. My name is Sharon Holani. I'm a law student from Ocean State University in Nigeria. And I'm also a legal tutor who teaches law students how to read smarter, not harder. And so I've really helped a lot of students to fulfill this. I'm so grateful to be here.

Dr Ariel King: 1:20

You know, we are so so happy to have you today. We're so grateful to have you all the way from Nigeria as a law student and also an advocate. Can you please introduce our subject today to our audience?

Sharon Olaniyi : 1:33

All right. The subject we're talking about here is the psychology of a focused student.

Dr Ariel King: 1:41

I love it. Tell us more about the psychology of the focused student.

Sharon Olaniyi : 1:46

Alright. So the psychology of a focused student is something that um many people don't really talk about, but a lot of students are they are suffering from it. Yeah. So um a lot of students are suffering from their from their books, you understand, and their mindsets. So a lot of students have even started failing even before they write the exam. And it has really, really affected a lot. So I want to talk about this to that particular student out there that thinks he or she is not capable, or he or she has even failed even before writing that particular exam. That that mindset can do a lot. In fact, you can you can imagine a lot even without or before you even write that particular exam. So it's just about your mindset, what you are capable of doing, you understand, before you actually do things, maybe write exams or a test or anything in life.

Dr Ariel King: 2:47

I really love that. You're saying that the mindset affects everything, it's not just what you've learned or what you studied, but how you think and how you prepare yourself for that. Is that correct?

Sharon Olaniyi : 2:58

Yes. Yes, this is wonderful.

Dr Ariel King: 3:02

So tell us more about um what young people, especially students, are typically going through with a mindset that's not working for them, not just to pass their exams, but in order to know that they can get through, you know, the courses that they're doing and then be able to use that for their professional life.

Sharon Olaniyi : 3:24

All right. If I get you right, you're trying to tell me that I should tell about how students can actually feel through hairs and period. Yes, exactly.

Dr Ariel King: 3:33

What's what's going on today in many students' minds? How are they handling this idea of sometimes uh not being able to focus, not being able to understand how to put their mindset together in order to be successful?

Sharon Olaniyi : 3:49

All right. The thing is, a lot of students are comparing themselves to another person, and they think that they are not capable. Because let me start my own story. I used to think I was dumb. I used to think my brain can't carry a lot of things. I used to think that I was not lucky, but when I came to realize that I am capable, I went through lots of teachings, I went through lots of mentorship, and I come I've come to realize that I am capable and that's really helped me. Through affirmations, I pasted affirmations on my wall, I pasted affirmations on my table, and I believed and worked towards it that I am capable, and definitely it really worked in my results. I really had an amazing result, I'm telling you. So when it actually worked for me, I actually put it out there that you can actually do it also, you can actually believe. The thing is, many students think that they can't do it because um their mind has been figured to that. If you figure your mind that you are not capable, definitely your brain will be wired to actually do what you actually think. But when you think outside the box, you think that you can actually do it, definitely you will do it. I assure you. I'm talking from experience and it has worked for me and people that have actually trained, so it will definitely work for you. So whether you are a student or any any situation in life, this actually applies to other situations where you believe that you can actually do this and you walk towards it, definitely you will do it. I'm serious.

Dr Ariel King: 5:29

I really love that. Tell me more about the affirmations. You're saying that um what you did is you were able to put uh affirmations in front of you in various places in the house so that you can see what your goal was. Um, first, how did you choose those goals? And then, second, how did you then where did you put and how did you put the affirmations and how did you lose them in order to achieve your goal?

Sharon Olaniyi : 5:53

All right, you let me first of all say this. I used to think affirmations are not real, like who just say it, you know. But I have come to realize that affirmation works. You your mentality is your reality. What you say, what you think, what you put in your mind will definitely come to reality. And when I um wrote the I wrote affirmations, when I believed it, and at first, at first, a first-time, let me say, a first-time um positive thinker might be um, let's say, um be a bit, be a bit negative thinker, sometimes like be doubting, be skeptical. Do you understand? And um, but you just have to just have to continue with the flow, continue with the flow that you can actually think. At first, I was I was skeptical. I was like, is this impossible? But another another side of me was like, I can actually do it. I had a mentor who told me and explained everything that has to do with my affirmations and how it actually helps the brain, it wires the brain. You say what you actually want, you believe what you actually want. If one believes that he or she can fail, definitely you work towards that failure. That video will definitely happen. But if you believe that you can actually do it, you can you can be successful, you can succeed. That course will you will actually have a good grade in that particular course. Rise the grade you want for that semester. I don't know what they call it in your country, but in my country, we call it semester. Yeah. So write the grade you want in that semester and you work towards it and you read towards it. That one is even a different topic entirely on how to read smartly, not hardly. Do you understand? So, um, a lot of students need to, they need to believe, first of all. They need to have this negative, remove this negative negative mindset that they are not capable. I was once like that before. I thought I could not do a lot. I thought my brain, like I was just gone, I was dumb. But when I came to realize that I am capable of irrespective of the situation I go through, I am really capable, and that mindset really helped me. So now, yeah, the affirmations, when um at first, you must have this mindset. I'm I'm really emphasizing on mindset because it is it is really the um let's say the brain box of everything. Yeah. So mindset is something that you must actually um put into reality, even before it comes to reality. You put it into reality in your head, even before it comes to reality. So now when I put those affirmations, some of the affirmations, for example, I can't do it, you are successful. Sharon, you are capable, you are not a failure. I put it, and anytime I wake up in the morning, I see this, I say it before I sleep, I say it, it rewires my brain. Nothing that has to do with failure comes to me anymore. And any friend that is toxic or talks anything about um failure or that is negative, I remove myself from that kind of friendship. So now, and also there are some people that they always want to, they don't know how to remove themselves from that negativity. They you they they revolve around negativity, their friends are toxic, the the uh content they watch on social media are toxic, and even they they feel like they want to grow, but they you can't grow like that. You have to break the shackles and believe that you can actually you can actually be better. So when you when you do that, break the shackles, write inform uh affirmations. Affirmations really helps. It really really helps. Say what you want to be, what you want to do, you can actually do it. You understand? A particular course, I um there's a particular course back then in a particular level of mine in school. Um people do say the course is very hard, it's very difficult. In fact, the least you can actually have is probably let me a C, for example. And um, but I do tell myself that irrespective of that particular, maybe some set actually fail the course does not mean that I will fail it, does not mean that my set will fail it. If we actually put our mind to it, ask questions that matter and work towards it and read towards it, definitely we cannot fail. So I feel like failure is not just about your um what people other people did or other people think of you, it's about what you think of yourself. When you think you will feel, definitely the person will feel. But when you think you will not feel, you will not feel because of what your brain is wired not to feel, and definitely you walk towards it.

Dr Ariel King: 10:32

I love the fact that you're also talking about mindset, it's not just it's also affirmations, but it's your environment. So it's really interesting to me that you said that when people are negative with you and they behave in a negative way, or what you would call toxic, right? That you said, okay, in order to meet my goal, in order to allow myself to have not just the affirmations in my reality, I have to remove those people. Can you speak more about that and um how to remove people? Um, or how do you put yourself in a bubble so what they say doesn't affect you? Or how how do you do that uh in a way that allows you to be successful without being a solo island, without you know, uh basically um eliminating everybody from your life? Or do you get more new positive people? How does that work?

Sharon Olaniyi : 11:20

All right, thank you so much for that question. Okay, the thing is a lot of people don't know how to say no, they don't know how to, they don't know how to reject, but they feel they would um make the other person feel bad, you know, about the relationship and all of that. But there is a way you can do things even without like in a distance way, without letting the person, you know, between let me say, is it that without um making the person feel bad, or you just be on your lane. Let me put this for example, maybe a friend who comes to your house, you know, to have maybe discussions, talk, and the discussions do drain you. Do you know that some people that actually talk and they really drain you? You know, this person drains me. I don't really like these conversations. This thing is really affecting my life. I don't like it. What you do is first and forcing, when the person comes, and you the person sees that you are busy, the person sees you are you are doing something very busy, and you can tell the person, can you just maybe come back or maybe just I want to do this thing, and you do it consistently, consistently, rather. The person will see that you actually not in anymore. You you know, you're not really saying it directly. There are some people that can say it directly, please and please. I don't really want to um have this relationship with you anymore. I don't like the the talks we talk about, the discussions we have. I want, I want to be, I just want to be distant from you. But some people that don't want to do it or they feel like they will make the other person feel bad, you actually um do some things that that is opposite them. You know, when you there are some things that you do, if you if if they meet you there, they will even join you. But when you see that this particular person does not like this thing, does not like growth, and you you are doing something that has to do with growth, the person will actually run away from you, and you have to be consistent in that. If not, you fall back onto the track. So just make sure that you you first and foremost um leave anything that has to do with them, leave anything that has to do with them, um, any any form of um music. Some people listen to uh music that has to do with failure, you understand, and some people also watch videos that don't help them, videos that that that that really really um causes a lot of issues, and you just need to um stop all the all those um habits. You need to read books that that promotes mindset, books that promote your mind, books that there is this particular book I'm reading currently, um awakening the giant in you. I read so one book, um, that was some time ago. That is um think and grow rich. Yes, apart from apart from like that's with your mindsets, your mindset that's by um if I can remember, can't remember.

Dr Ariel King: 14:18

By the way, that that book is very popular, it's been out for many years. So, bravo for you. I love that. I love you're saying it's I really love what you're saying. You're saying so it's not just think positive affirmations, it's watch who's around you, watch who you're associated with, but you're also saying, which I think is so important, be careful of what you listen to in terms of either music or videos or television, because that can also bring in negativity. That is so insightful. Can can you tell us more for the younger generation? And I'm talking about, you know, the United Nations as young as 35 and under. Is it difficult then to keep away from negativity? Is negativity the status quo? Is that the norm for most young people?

Sharon Olaniyi : 15:04

All right, yeah. So the thing is, will I say negativity? Some people have turned it to num, to a norm, rather, and it is it is really affecting a lot of people. It only takes someone that that is wise, someone that um that has a wide knowledge of things that will be able to realize that he or she is in negativity. A lot of people as, and the thing is, it only takes a very young person that has really, really done research on some things that will know that he or she is in negativity. That's what I'm trying to say. And there is a way you can break free from all those stuffs, all those negativity by reading books, by watching videos that helps, and also by making sure that you are in line with your goal. There are some friends that actually don't go in line with your goal, and you have to break free from them to actually achieve your goal. And please, can I really get the question again?

Dr Ariel King: 16:18

No, I mean, I I think that makes sense. You're you're very helpful. I'm learning from you. So you're also saying is that you know, some people might not be aligned to what you if you have a goal, right? And let's say the goal is to get an A, but you have friends that want to stay out all night, or they um they want to hang around and play lots of negative music while you want to read or you want to get in positivity. I love what you're saying because you're also saying that if they're not aligned, if you are not aligned, which means that if you don't have people around you, you are not reading the things that you need to read, you're not taking the actions that you need to take, the affirmations that you need to achieve your won't. And you know, I find that so insightful because when we first started, I thought, okay, it's just affirmations. And I realized, no, it's not just affirmations, it's what you do, it's what you read, it's who you know, it's who hangs around you, and being around positive people. Could you please tell us more about your mentor? And then can you tell us after about your mentor that helped you with this? How do you help other people? Because I know that you also help other students with this issue of being in alignment and being positive and meeting their goals.

Sharon Olaniyi : 17:27

All right, thank you. Having a mentor is a very great one because I I'm sorry, can I speak PJ?

Dr Ariel King: 17:35

Uh well I want to actually go ahead, go ahead. We go we go over the world. So if you speak PJ and put it in a language we all understand. Go ahead.

Sharon Olaniyi : 17:42

In in Nigeria, we say follow with no road. Because what I'm trying to say is that you have to follow the person that um knows the way. You can't, it's just like someone going on a particular location, you don't know anywhere, you don't know the location. You have to, there will be a person that will lead you to where you are going. So that is where a mentor comes in. So mentor is someone that will guide you. We have different types of mentor, I mean in different categories, and some they are all round. We have like you have financial mentor, you have academic mentor, you have different aspects. So now this one I'm talking about academic mentor, and this person guide me, you know, you know, put me through things that I um he has experienced, and um, so I won't fall into that same mistake. So currently, I'm even hosting a mentorship program for lost students that that don't want to make the mistake I also made, you know, and um I'm really glad to really help students. This is really my passion. I don't want people because I'm this person that any mistake I make, I don't want people before me to make that same mistake. So I organize um a program, it's going to start tomorrow. So for people that want to study smarter, not harder, because a lot of people are studying smarter, and um, so I am a lot of people are studying harder rather. So I want to mentor them and tell them the way, tell them tips that really, really helps that I have actually tried, have tested, I have actually um um tested to. So now mentorship is a very, very um powerful, like say powerful thing to have, or mentor, you have to have a mentor to guide you to put you through. Because if I didn't have a mentor, I would just be lost, I'll be lost on the way, I'll be lost on the journey. So, yeah, so that's it. And my mentor has really, really helped me a lot and is really, really helping me and guiding me in um my academics.

Dr Ariel King: 19:51

Love that. So the mentor is guiding you in academics, and as you said, it's spilling over into your life period, into your personal life, into your life, this mentor. And tell us more about the program that you said that you have starting tomorrow for law students. Would love to know more about that.

Sharon Olaniyi : 20:09

All right, no problem. I'll be glad to say that too. Okay, the program that I'll be starting tomorrow uh would be for law students, and I would part of the agenda of the program would be to explain to them tips on how to study smarter, not harder, and how to um memorize, you know, as lost students, memorize cases, memorize cases, and that is another issue entirely for lost students. Some don't know how to memorize cases, that is a very big issue for them, and I would explain to them um through my own experience tips that actually helps, tips that have actually used that you can study smarter and memorize cases, that's very easy for you to memorize the cases, and um yeah, so so and also there will be um we'll invite a senior colleague that's graduated, you know, to talk more of our own experience to the people so they'll be able to understand how it actually works. So it's just like a community that we actually help lost students, you know, to know the way rightly instead of um instead of trying to deviate from another thing. Because some students read for hours, you see students read for six hours, ten hours, and the results will not really show. So instead of because because I really have been there actually, you know, I read for long hours and the results will be there, but when I understand and know that it's not about reading for hours, it's about the quality, not the quantity of time that was actually um used. So that's just a short explanation. Thank you so much for that.

Dr Ariel King: 21:55

I remember there was, I think it was yesterday before there was actually a study looking at study periods, and the study basically said that if you study literally, I believe it's 20 minutes of intense study that you are truly focused, and um, or is it 25 minutes and you take a five-minute break? If you do that four times, right, then or five times, then you have a lot, you've learned a lot, you've studied more than if you just pull a full hour trying to keep your focus again and again. So I've tried that myself, and I think it's quite interesting. Giving 20 minutes or 25 minutes, and then it's really works. Does that work?

Sharon Olaniyi : 22:33

It really, really works. It really works.

Dr Ariel King: 22:37

I want to thank you for being with us today. Do you have any um last suggestions for our audience? Uh, speaking about the importance of working smarter rather than harder, and also affirmations and positivity.

Sharon Olaniyi : 22:55

All right, thank you so much for this opportunity. What I want to say to the public is that um stay focused, put your mind to what you are doing. You know, it's what you allow that will continue. If you allow failure, failure will continue. If you want to succeed, you put your mind to it, definitely it will actually work, irrespective of the situation. I'm talking from experience, irrespective of the situation that you have, just put your mindset that this thing will definitely work. Work towards it, and it will definitely work. Mindset is a topic that's that is underrated. Many people don't talk about it, but a lot of people are dealing with issues that have to do with mindset. But your mentality is actually your reality. So please just do what works, put your mindset to it, and definitely it will work.

Dr Ariel King: 23:49

Thank you so much for being with us. So very insightful. And we really thank you to your audience. Thank you so much for being with us today. And remember, if I'm not for myself, who will be for me? If I am only for myself, what am I? If not now, then when? That was by the philosopher Hillel. And I've added, if not me, then who? Thank you so much for joining us today.