No Shrinking Violets Podcast for Women
No Shrinking Violets is all about what it truly means for women to take up their space in the world – mind, body and spirit. Mary Rothwell, licensed therapist and certified integrative mental health practitioner, has seen women “stay small” and fit into the space in life that they have been conditioned to believe they deserve. Drawing on 35 years in the mental health field and from her perspective as a woman who was often told to "stay in your lane," Mary discusses how early experiences, society and sometimes our own limiting beliefs can convince us that living inside guardrails is the best -- or only -- option. She'll explore how to recognize our unique essential nature and how to use that to empower a new narrative.Through topics that span psychology, friendships, nature and even gut-brain health, Mary creates a space that is inspiring and authentic - where she celebrates the intuition and power of women who want to chart their own course and program their own GPS.
Mary's topics will include sleep and supplements and nutrition and how to live like a plant. (Yes, you read that right - the example of plants is often the most insightful path to knowing what we truly need to feel fulfilled). She’ll talk about setting boundaries, communicating, and relationships, and explore mental health and wellness: trauma and resilience, how our food impacts our mood and the power of simple daily habits. And so much more!
As a gardener, Mary knows that violets have been misjudged for centuries and are actually one of the most resilient and ecologically important plants in her native garden. Like violets, women are often underestimated, and they can even mistake their unique gifts for weaknesses. Join Mary to explore all the ways the vibrant and strong violet is an example for finding fulfillment in our own lives.
Episodes
134 episodes
The Trauma of Betrayal: How to Recover and Thrive
Betrayal has a special kind of aftermath: you’re not only grieving what happened, you’re questioning your judgment, your sanity, and whether you can trust yourself at all. I open with two betrayals that shaped me in different ways, one in a rel...
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The Hidden Agenda in Conflict and How It Keeps You Stuck
A tough truth about relationship conflict is that we often walk into “the talk” with a hidden agenda: we want the other person to change. I unpack why that hope can keep you stuck, especially when you’re dealing with chronic behavior patterns t...
Finding Healing from Childhood Trauma in Sobriety and Grace
Anger can feel like protection until you notice what it’s doing to your body. That’s where we start, with a hard truth and a hopeful one: you can have every right to be angry and still choose grace when you’re ready to stop carrying the weight....
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Is Empathy Getting in the Way of Healthy Boundaries?
Chasing the reason someone hurt you can feel productive, but it often turns into a maze that drains your energy and delays the one thing that actually helps: a clear boundary. I’m sharing a short, practical mindset shift for anyone who keeps re...
How to be "Bad": Finding Your Authentic Voice Through Nature And Sass
Being “too much” is often just another way the world tells women to be smaller. Mary Rothwell sits down with author and writing teacher Amy Lou Jenkins to trace how a strong, sassy voice gets mislabeled as “bad” and how reclaiming that voice ca...
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The Simple Shift that Increases Emotional Regulation
Your mind can spin a thousand explanations in seconds, but your body just wants one clear answer: what are you feeling right now? In this mini No Shrinking Violets conversation, I share a deceptively simple technique that can reduce emotional p...
Surviving Tragedy: How a Near Death Experience Changed Her Priorities
We talk with Pam Warren about how a single catastrophic day reshapes identity, priorities, and the meaning of a life well lived. We dig into trauma, chronic pain, PTSD, and the practical mindset shifts that help us stop shrinking and start choo...
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Are You Loving Well?
The easiest reaction to a stressful world is to pull back, close the shutters, and decide you’re done with people. We’ve felt that impulse too, especially when politics, headlines, and even everyday friction with neighbors can make connection f...
Tiny Reframes For Positivity And Self-Acceptance
A lot of “positive quotes” sound good and vanish two hours later. We wanted something different: real stories that earn the takeaway, the kind you can carry into your day when you’re driving, cleaning the sink, or lying awake with your brain on...
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Are Your Habits Shrinking Your Brain?
We share a quick invitation to our May 12 book launch party in Lancaster, then dig into neuroplasticity and why the brain can keep adapting well into adulthood. We lay out simple, realistic ways to “bush up” your brain with novelty, small chall...
Getting Lost, Finding Belonging, and Living Authentically
Tracy Smith and I trace how a one-way ticket to Iceland opened a lifelong practice of choosing ourselves, building belonging from the inside out, and letting imperfect trips change more than itineraries. Tracy shares candid stories from panic i...
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Setting Boundaries: Are You a Walnut Tree or an Orchid?
We share why boundaries keep surfacing in our lives and why guilt is often the biggest barrier to setting them. Using plant wisdom, we connect self-protection to resilience and show how healthier limits can support both us and the people we lov...
Calm Power in The Workplace: Strategy vs. Emotion
What if the strongest move in a heated meeting isn’t a sharper argument, but a calmer nervous system? We unpack how to lead without shrinking—especially when the room runs hot, the pushback is loud, and your body is screaming to retreat. Throug...
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Do You Have Hidden Beliefs that Impact Your Thoughts and Feelings? - Part 2
We finish our series on Albert Ellis’s irrational ideas and the hidden beliefs they create in daily life. We focus on avoidance, dependence, the grip of the past, people-pleasing, perfectionism, and emotional regulation so you can spot what’s d...
Midlife Desire: How Honest Conversations Revive Intimacy And Rewrite Sexual Scripts
Sex shouldn’t feel like a performance review you’re destined to fail. We pull back the curtain on the quiet pressures that keep women from asking for what they want, then rebuild intimacy on a foundation of comfort, consent, and curiosity. With...
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Do You Have Hidden Beliefs that Impact Your Thoughts and Feelings? - Part 1
We unpack six classic irrational beliefs from CBT and rational emotive therapy and show how they fuel anxiety, perfectionism, anger, and people-pleasing. We also share practical ways to test the evidence, make a plan, and stop giving everyday s...
Midlife, Menopause, And The Power of Gathering
What if midlife isn’t a slow fade but a bright second spring? We sit down with life coach and community builder Cheryl Dillon to talk honestly about perimenopause, menopause, and the unexpected freedom that comes when we stop pretending and sta...
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Is Visualizing a Positive Outcome Effective?
We talk through a simple shift that changes how we handle anxiety: stop mentally rehearsing the worst and start practicing success. We break down outcome visualization versus process visualization and show how vivid, step by step mental rehears...
From Relationship Ambivalence To Clarity: Ways To Decide Whether To Stay Or Go
Love should feel honest, not hazy. We sit down with Dr. Merideth Thompson, founder of Partner Lab, to unpack how data-driven insights turn relationship confusion into clarity—whether you’re looking to strengthen a good partnership, repair a dri...
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Is “Bloom Where You’re Planted” Always Good Advice?
We explore how growth depends on environment, using plant climate zones to rethink belonging at work, at home, and in relationships. A late mini turns into a clear call to honor seasons, stop forced pushing, and choose the right climate to thri...
From Codependence To Clarity: Creating Healthy Boundaries
What if the problem isn’t that your boundaries are too soft, but that you were taught they had to be walls? We open this conversation by replacing the brick-and-mortar myth with a living metaphor: doors with windows, sensors, and keypads—flexib...
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Do We Really Feel Grief (and Happiness) in Our Hearts?
We explore heart coherence—the way the body, brain, and emotions sync—and how the vagus nerve helps us return from stress to calm. We share simple practices, stories from pets and people, and why a real hug can change a room.• definitio...
Racism & Bias: Using Privilege to Amplify Others
Mary and Dr. Stacey Pearson-Wharton trace how “being the dot” reveals both hypervisibility and invisibility, why representation changes help-seeking, and how to apologize without defensiveness. We share tools to move from fear to action, build ...
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Is Avoidance a Form of Rest?
We explore the fine line between restorative rest and reactive avoidance, using body cues, purpose, and outcomes to tell them apart. We share simple practices to renew energy, regain perspective, and rebuild self-trust without shrinking your wo...
From Abuse and Shrinking to Self-Recovery: Unmasking Your True Colors
A single sentence can change everything. When Kristen Crabtree heard, “You don’t need her permission to move out,” it shattered years of camouflaging and control, and set her on a path from invisibility to self-recovery. We dive into the quiet ...
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