EP 47: Detox Your Inner Good Girl: Why Doing Everything Right Still Keeps You Stuck (and 3 Ways to Show Up More Authentically)

Join me for the Good Girl Detox Masterclass 11/13 - save your seat here!

You’ve done the healing, the recovery, the personal growth—and still feel like you're hitting ceilings in your own life.

In this unfiltered episode, we’re talking about Good Girl Conditioning—the invisible programming that teaches women to be grateful but not greedy, ambitious but not too much, and selfless at their own expense. It’s patriarchy in a pretty outfit, and it’s running our lives far more than we realize.

In this episode, I unpack:

• What good girl conditioning actually is and how it hides in plain sight
• How it shows up for women (especially in recovery and leadership)
• Why it keeps you exhausted, over-functioning, and under-fulfilled
• Three simple ways to start detoxing your inner good girl so you can show up more boldly, freely, and authentically

If this conversation hits home, join me for my free masterclass The Good Girl Detox: Shatter Ceilings, Ditch Perfectionism, and Create Your Next-Level Success, happening Thursday, November 13 at 12 PM CT.

We’ll go deeper into why you’ve created so much and still feel exhausted, how to unhook from patriarchal patterns, and the framework that will help you rise into your next level of power, peace, and prosperity.

Save your seat here.

Hey gorgeous.

I love you.

I'm so proud of you.

And I believe in your ability to create a life you absolutely love.

Transcript

0:01

Hey, gorgeous. Imagine this, you're about to make a big decision that expands your business or advocates for your family, or moves you in the direction of what you said you really want. And instead of overthinking or spiraling and indecision or signing up for another course, you confidently say, yes, I want this. No, I don't. Yes, I need this. Yes, I want this to happen, or here's what we're gonna do. Girl, you know yourself. You know what's important. You source your own internal guidance and feel empowered to make decisions that support you and your success. You're confident you know your own wholeness. You take brave action and make courageous decisions because you have detoxed your inner good girl conditioning, and that is what every woman deserves. But many of us are still buying the lies of being stuck or blocked or afraid. And I wanna tell you the truth with love, you are not stuck or blocked or afraid, but you may just have good girl conditioning and it's probably keeping you from everything you say you want. So join me, my gorgeous friend. For my next free masterclass, the Good Girl Detox, where we will shatter ceiling glass ceilings, ditch dis ditch perfectionism, and create our next level success. And it's happening Thursday, November 13th at 12:00 PM Central and you can find the link to register on my Instagram bio. Or in the show notes of the episode that drops this week, 1111, come join me. Get ready to break the invisible rules that you're following. Unleash your voice and your dreams, and unapologetically create your next level of success. Grab your spot at the link and my bio on Instagram or in the show notes and the episode that drops 1111, and get ready to detox your inner good girl so you can show up as the powerful. Wise woman that you are? Mwuah!. Welcome to the Girls Who Recover podcast with Dana Hunter Fradella, where incredible women just like you, go to transform life's biggest setbacks into your most powerful comebacks so that you can live a life you. Love. I'm your host, Dana Hunter Ella, transformational coach and founder of Girls Who Recover, and my mission is to pull back the curtain on our mistakes, failures, shame and personal disasters, and light the way for how to use those to create your biggest and most gorgeous comebacks. Follow the show now. Grab your iced coffee and turn up the volume for girls who recover. Let's light it up. hello, gorgeous. Welcome back to the Girls Here Recover Podcast, your favorite host, Dana Hunter Fela. And today we are going to be talking about your next detox. And no, I don't mean from the booze we should be on, be beyond that today I am talking about. Detoxing your inner good girl and why you doing everything right is still keeping you stuck and probably overwhelmed, exhausted, et cetera. So I wanna talk about good girl conditioning, the thing that might be running your life without you even realizing it. Listen, if you're listening to the Girls Who Recover podcast, I already know you've done the things, you've done, the therapy, the healing, the mindset work, the breath work, the yoga, all the things, and if you're still feeling stuck or exhausted or like you're hitting an up. Level in your own success, you're probably dealing with what I'm gonna call today, good girl conditioning. And before I go any further, I'm hosting a masterclass this Thursday, November 13th at 12:00 PM Central. Yes, there will be a replay and it's called The Good Girl Detox. And you wanna save your free seat because if any of this podcast, which is really just a teaser for that. Sexy masterclass comes through for you and grabs you by the shoulders and shakes you a little bit. I want your behind in that masterclass. So good girl conditioning, if you're like me, it's literally baked into the pie and it's been baked into most of us since birth. Especially if you are living in western society, which most of you are. Although now we're global, so we've got a lot of international listeners. But this is for my girls who. Have good girl conditioning, and it's sneaking into the way that we're living our life, into our recovery, into our marriage, into our business, into our momming, into our being, into our friending. It's really insidious the way that good girl conditioning, and ever since I planned that masterclass, I'm seeing it everywhere. I'm waking up to it, which is what we're gonna be doing a little bit today and even more so deeply in the masterclass on Thursday. So be sure you register. The link is on my Instagram. The link is in the show notes. The link is on your, for just get the link and get yourself in that masterclass today. So first I wanna start with what are you talking about? What is good girl conditioning? I'm gonna give you a really clear, accessible definition. So number one, good girl conditioning is the subconscious programming that tells you as a woman, that your value comes from things like how nice you are, how helpful you are, how humble you are, how self. Sacrificing. You are how good you are. I went off on Instagram not too long ago because there are all these people, well-meaning God bless you all who are saying, oh, you're G to my girls. You're such good girls. Oh, those good girls. And I'm like, oh, fuck the patriarchy. Good girls. How about you call'em brilliant and wise and brave and incredible. So good girl conditioning, right? Which we get from not individual people, but from a society that has big ideas about what women should be doing and saying and how we should be being or not being. And it seeps down just like a language. So I want you to think about patriarchy and social conditioning like you would think of your language. So like me, many of you speak English. Why do you speak English? Because you were born into a society where English is the first language. Some of you're listening from France, you speak French because you were born into a society that speaks French. You see what I'm saying? If you're born into a place, you're likely to adapt and acquire the beliefs, ideas, and attitudes of where you were born. Okay, so this is not a finger pointing experiment. This is a, we're waking up and we're asking what is in the water. And it is good girl conditioning and. It's essentially patriarchy in a really cute outfit. Okay, so what is patriarchal conditioning? What is patriarchy in general? It really isn't about men per se. It's about men dominated systems that reward women who are compliant and punish authenticity and audacity and walking un a potted. Unapologetically, it's the Invisible Rule book that says that your power as a woman is a problem and that you should apologize for having it. So I wanna give you an example. It sounds really silly. We were visiting, we were at a park this weekend in Alabama visiting my sister, and there was this gorgeous woman who's pushing her little baby in the swing. And somebody from the other side of the playground throws a ball and hits her with it. So let me say this again. Beautiful woman pushing her kid in a swing. Someone else throws a ball, hits her with it, and this is what she says. Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm I'll get it for you. I'm gonna run and get it for you. I'm so sorry I. I thought oh, please, Dana, do not go up and talk to this woman, and I didn't because it's not a her problem. It's a social, systemic problem where that woman felt like she needed to apologize for being hit in the head with a ball, and then she felt like she needed to be the one that went and picked up the ball. Okay. That is what I'm talking about and that might seem silly to you, but I bet if we look closer under the hood of your life, if you're a woman taking a deep breath right now, we're gonna find something that smells like good girl conditioning and it's probably gonna be a lot, again, patriarchy in a cute out fit. And it keeps us apologizing and hesitating and balking and wondering and overthinking and spiraling. And I was on a call today and a woman said I couldn't. I couldn't possibly do that. I'm a nice person and we're talking about sales and offering and inviting someone into an incredible opportunity and she said I don't wanna release the spot. I wanna be nice. That is good girl conditioning, and it is getting in the way of the thing that you think you are saying that you want. What is it that you want? I hope that by now you have been along the ride long enough for me to at least have an inkling of what you would love for most of the women in my community. It is more revenue, it is more purpose. It is more bravery. It is more audacity. It is more asking and receiving what you actually want. So whether that's money, it's better sex, it's more confidence. It's you being able to have that conversation with your partner or your boss or your team where you're saying exactly what you mean because. Clarity and directness is kindness. Not apologizing for it, not being passive aggressive, not saying what you mean. All of that is good girl conditioning. Shout out to Kim Scott. Who wrote the book? You're gonna have to help me out. Let me google this really fast. Radical Candor. Okay. Bless you, Kim Scott. That book changed my life. Being radically candid is one way to overcome good girl conditioning, especially as a woman. We like to Dr. Run around the bus instead of get getting in the seat and driving it because we might hurt somebody's feelings. God forbid we hurt somebody's feelings. Another story. I'm already going way off the track. I'm in bed last night and I'm publishing this new piece for the masterclass. My, my 8-year-old is sitting there watching me type things like, fuck the patriarchy. Which by the way, if you're watching on YouTube is my, got my new earrings. Thanks Ava. Levy so much for these. Where are we going? Oh, yes. And in the post I said, we don't care if we hurt your feelings. And my 8-year-old was like, mom, you can't say that. And I said, oh Lord, girl, you need to be in the masterclass because yes, we can. And it's not that we're setting out in the world to be. Mean or unkind, but I'm not gonna be living my life wondering whether or not I hurt your feelings because I'll never create, accomplish, achieve what I've been put here to do. If I'm walking around wondering oh my God, what if I say this? And what if I see this and oh, she might be mad at me. I don't have any, I have no energy for that. I've invested enough energy in that uri. Okay, so we're gonna be done with that. Let me get back to my script because. This is really just supposed to be a teaser for the masterclass. Plug for the masterclass. It's free. Get yourself there. Come live, because that's where the energy is. And yes, there will be a replay, but it's not gonna be as sexy as the real thing. So get yourself there la. Okay, good girl. Conditioning, we're set. It's the subconscious, invisible programming that kept that woman apologizing. That kept, maybe keeps you making excuses for yourself or for the people that you love. That makes us work too hard and over function and try to make it all look good at the same time. Okay. That's essentially what it is. And this is how it shows up for us specifically. So have you ever said yes to something when all of your body and your spirit was like, don't do that. And you said, okay, I think I can make that happen, or Yes, I'll take that on and listen. I'm not making fun of you. I am you. I am the room mom again, even though I. Swore on everything I had, it would not be a room mommy again. But the 10-year-old gave me the puppy eyes and nobody else will do it. And so I'm like, oh man, they cannot have a room, mom. I guess it has to be me. That's good girl conditioning saying yes. When all of you, including your brilliant multi degree, multi multilingual self knows better. Okay. Maybe it looks like you rewriting texts or overthinking emails to sound a little softer oh, God forbid. I'd be direct and ask. Ask specifically for what I want. God forbid I ask for$10,000 and say it directly. So we're rewriting our texts, our emails. I don't know that you're writing handwritten letters, probably not anymore, but reframing yourself to sound softer because God forbid you be assertive, aggressive, even concise and direct. And again, Kim Scott. Clarity and directness is kindness. It's very empowering. The other thing is, I'm in a lot of meetings. And I don't do this anymore most of the time, but I would overthink and over prepare before I ever open my mouth. And what that did was, number one, it stopped me from listening to you. Okay? So it blocks me from being connected to humanity. And number two is, it didn't make it any better. Over preparing does not make things better, which is why I joke. I want you to know how I prepare these podcasts. I have an idea. I write an outline. I use AI to help me flesh it out, and then I press record. I don't overthink it. I don't have time for that, and I hope that you feel that authentic. Buy the seat of my pants, which makes it totally real like you and I are driving in a car together.'cause maybe we are right now you sexy thing. That's what I wanna bring to you so that you can start practicing your own authentic a dayness. Okay? The other, some other ways it might show up for you is you doing more emotional labor for everyone else around you. And I had this example right before I recorded this podcast. My sweet god bless her, my mother-in-law, she takes the kids on Monday. She makes my life so much easier. I love her so much and my 10-year-old. Is not the best finder. So she likes to lose things or not remember where they are, and then she can't find them. And then she like, I don't know, goes into a trauma response, like I do when she starts looking for things. No idea where she gets that from, but I was in the middle of a call when she came home. And she said, oh, I can't find my dance bag. And I was like, oh, that sounds really hard. And then I went back to my work and I think she expected me to, oh honey, I'll help you find it and let's look through the things, because that's what I normally do. But since I'm prepping for this good girl Masterclass, I'm not gonna do that. I'm gonna empower her to find her own dance bag, which she absolutely can. We were in a minimalist household. It can only be in about four places. And I am not gonna do for you what you can do for yourself. That's called enabling. The other thing, which is more internal. And listen, I have a hundred million examples, come to the masterclass and I wanna give you some more. But it's the internal feeling, guilty or ashamed for wanting what you mother fucking want, okay? Which might mean taking a nap. So I'll give you another example. I went to Alabama this weekend. I wanted to be with my sister, my nephew's celebrating his fourth birthday. What a blast. And oftentimes we can't make it up there for things like that. So I was like, we're gonna be there. We're gonna be there. And I knew that the party was gonna require, for me, it requires a lot of energy to be at a party, especially where I don't know anybody. And so I knew that to take really good care of myself. I had to take a nap before that party, and I decided a couple of things. Number one, I am going to take my nap because that is what I need. I'm so clear on what I need to function well in the world, and oftentimes I need that and then some. And I decided I was gonna get up one hour before that party started and then be helpful both before, during, and especially after the party, because then I would've been well taken care of and that is what I felt good about and I refuse. Those two, the old me would've been, first of all, bypassing the nap, and then I would've been so cranky and resentful. And two is, although there were other people hurrying and scurrying about, I refused to feel guilty about taking care of myself. I was also able to be of maximum service to hold space for people at that party to celebrate with my nephew and hang out with my kids because of that. And so there's this internal part of me that's you should feel guilty'cause you took a nap and you could have helped more and you could have done more All that is good girl conditioning. Do you follow? The other thing is guilty for wanting more. So one thing I love to coach women through is asking for more money in job negotiations or raises. And oftentimes we spend an entire session making it feel safe to ask specifically for what you want. So we are asking sometimes for 30, 40,$50,000 more. Then they're asking, which is not something that feels comfortable, I would imagine for most people, but definitely not for women, because I'll tell you, for the most part in my career, this is what I thought. Oh, I couldn't possibly ask for more. I should just be grateful for what they give me, or, oh, I couldn't possibly ask for more. They probably don't have it in their budget, or I couldn't possibly ask for more because then I'll look greedy. Do you feel me? All of that is good girl conditioning, all of that is patriarchy. All of that is trying to keep women small, stuck in a box. That's why women and men that have the exact same job have a huge pay discrepancy, and it's even worse for my black and brown friends I. In the world. So all of this is patriarchy. It's all good girl conditioning. And that is what I feel called to do as my work in the world, is to notice it, alchemize it so that you can show up and so can I as an empowered, wise woman who's confident in clarifying what she wants and then asking for it. And then what do you know receiving it? What does this look like if you're in recovery?'cause I know a lot of you're in recovery, it looks like. Early on in my program, I thought I have to go to 90 meetings in 90 days. Which, listen, that's a good suggestion. But after three years, I didn't need to be going to a meeting every single day. I was starting to have a life. I had a job, I had a boyfriend, I had a house I had a life. Now, I needed to do what was necessary to stay sober and to be in good standing in recovery. But that doesn't look the same for everyone. And I'm really excited because I have a few interviews coming up. For women who've gotten sober and are in recovery who didn't follow the same path that I followed, and I love a good multi-perspective. So it looks like me feeling guilty because I'm not able to say yes to taking on another mentee. It looks like me feeling guilty because I'm not able to make three or four meetings this week or me needing to cancel with the me with. With a mentee because I'm not feeling well, right? So it's me believing that I have to keep this standard of go go do always all the things, right? This position and that position, and serve at every level, and mentee, all the mentor, all the people, and go to the meetings that this da, right? No, that. Especially, I'm at 15 years sober, right? Like I don't need all of that. I need a foundation of recovery that we've talked about what that looks like in other episodes. I won't belabor that here, but the idea that I need to be doing more. I bet you can relate to that, whether you're not in, whether you're in recovery or not. I need to be doing more. I'm always behind. I'm always feeling bad about not being able to do more. Not, it's never enough. And it's an internal game. Sometimes it's an external game. People are actually saying like, why can't you do more? It's interesting because it often happens to be women who say that, and then when I say I'm not available for that, or no, it's like I'm speaking Greek to them. What do you mean we're not supposed to say no. Okay, you follow me. We think that being a good mom or a good wife or a good mentor or a good friend means saying yes to everything. Even when, if I'm saying yes to mentoring more people, or if I'm saying yes to more meetings, I'm saying no to time with my husband, no to time with my exercise. No, with time with my kids. So my yeses are very precious and so are my nos, and so we are confusing. Good girl conditioning service with self-sacrifice. So we're staying busy and we're staying small and we're calling it spiritual and humility and we need to be done because the deal is you can still be sober and in recovery and still really caged in by the good girl programming. You can still be. Healing your body and finding your truth, but abandoning who you are and what you actually want. So we can be doing really good things, but underneath we've got a motor of good girl conditioning that's running the shoe. A show, and here's the cost. Good girl conditioning is a big. Dream blocker. I almost said cock blocker, so let me just say it. Okay. It's a big cock blocker. In some cases, it's because we're trying to be so good that we're not letting ourselves partner up with sexy people. You see where I'm going there? Okay. I want you to remember that good girl conditioning is a blocker. It blocks things like your voice, your truth, your ability to show up and be visible. It blocks the money. It blocks the love, it blocks the peace. All those things that when you finally take a deep breath and you're like, oh, I would love this. Good girl conditioning is blocking that because it keeps our nervous system addicted to cortisol to over-functioning. To overdoing, to overthinking all the overs. And our nervous system is basically humming all the time. And then we have this added component of, oh, but is she gonna be mad at me? And are they gonna be judge me? And is everyone gonna hate me? And are there gonna be trolls? It's why we create internal guilt and shame loops that make our success or asking for what we want feel unsafe. So if you're experiencing guilt, which if you're taking a breath, you probably are, if you're experiencing shame, which if you're a woman in the world, you probably are. All of that is likely founded on good girl conditioning, which makes. Any expansion, feel unsafe. And listen, we manifest, create an endeavor at the speed of safety. I'm quoting Tracy Lit on that we manifest, create an endeavor at the speed of safety. So if your nervous system doesn't feel safe asking for$30,000 more, you won't do it. And it will sound like, oh, because you're trying to be grateful for what you have. But that keeps us small. And stuck in a cage that was created by what's in the water. So I'm gonna teach you in just a second, one or two things that can help you wake up and pour yourself a different kind of drink. Okay. The other cost of good girl conditioning is it. That bumps us up against our own ceilings. So emotional ceilings, financial ceilings, spiritual ceilings that will not move. I love this idea of the glass ceiling, you know about this glass ceiling, right? It's this space that a woman hits where she just can't break through. And a lot of it is because social system structures in the patriarchy that have us caged into the belief that we couldn't possibly go for more. And if we do, then we're gonna have to work. Extra hard 80 hours a week just to get the same experience as a man. Okay? So it's why we're hitting ceilings in all of those ways, and they're not moving. No matter how hard you work or how much you volunteer, or how many clients you say yes to, or opportunities you go for, it's these upper limits that won't. Budge because good girl conditioning is running the show. And you, instead of saying staying peaceful and grounded and focused on your dreams, you're out there busy managing everybody else and their emotions and their schedules and their behaviors and what they're saying. So we're doing anything we can to avoid looking our dream in the face and go for it. That is good girl conditioning. So here are three quick ways to detox. We're gonna start the detox now. You are gonna be in that masterclass on Tuesday. Get your free seat in the show notes. Find it on Instagram, dm me and I'll send it to you or my team'cause we have a team now. Hooray. Here are three quick ways to start detoxing your inner good girl. Are you ready for it? Okay, number one, we're gonna notice and name it. Write that down, notice and name it. So I carry a magic wand with me wherever I go. If this video ever makes it to YouTube, know that I'm waving this wand in your face. And the magic of the wand is awareness and waking up. Being awake at the wheel of our own life, because right now most of us are fully asleep and we're blaming it on things like, oh, I have anxiety, or, I'm too busy, or, all those things. But really it's, we're asleep at the wheel of our own life. We feel like we're stuck where we are. We feel like we should just be grateful for what we have, which means we're not fulfilling the assignment given to us by the creator of the fucking universe, and we have got to be done with that. So step one, I'm not making this a masterclass, I promise it's just a teaser. Okay. You're gonna notice and name it. So you're noticing where you shrink. You're noticing where you're holding back, you're noticing where you're softening in order not to feel like you're in anybody's face or you're noticing where you shut up and stay silent. In order to not rot the boat to keep yourself safe. Oh, I don't wanna hurt their feelings. Okay, that's a big trigger one. Or what will they think or I couldn't possibly. So I used to think that was a southern woman thing. And now I've interviewed women for the podcast all over the world, and I realize it is a global patriarchal epidemic. So you're gonna notice when you do that, we're not gonna be judging ourselves, we're gonna be approaching with non-judgmental observation and curiosity. Not the kind that kills the cat, but the kind that boosts the woman into her own power or noticing. We're naming it. And then I want you to ask who said so, whose rules am I following right now? Who said so? Who said I couldn't ask for that? Who said I couldn't take a nap? Who said I couldn't train for that race? Who said I couldn't po? And I'm gonna be honest with you, it was probably you. That's the good girl conditioning. It's so snake snide. What's the word I'm looking for? It's so sneaky because we think it's out there, but really we've internalized it and we've become so domesticated by our social expectations that now it's our own programming. Number two. I'm just gonna snap a couple times here because we are going to interrupt the pattern. We're gonna interrupt the pattern. So we've noticed and named it. We've asked, whose rules am I following, who said so? And the second step is you're going to interrupt, which means you're going to do one small, rebellious, audacious, unapologetic thing a day. And that might be saying no and letting that be a complete sentence. It might mean saying, I'm gonna think about it instead of course I'll take care of it. It might mean you saying you can get your own dance back, girl, because I am about to record a podcast and I need to be feeling grounded. It might mean posting the thing online that you are terrified to post, but that will set you apart from the people who are saying the same thing and it will rise you and your dreams outta the ashes of ai. Can we please stop with that? Listen, I tried my hand at it. It is really soul sucking. You can raise your rates. You can sign up for the race one small. I like to call it a five minute action. Each day to expand your capacity to grow and stand in your own power. And by doing that one small, rebellious, audacious, unapologetic action. Each day you are teaching your nervous system that being powerful and standing in your own power is safe. It's safe. It's safe to grow. It's safe to ask. It's safe to rest. It's safe to expand, and we will only do that when our nervous system feels safe. So be sure your behind is in that masterclass because I'm gonna teach you how to regulate and satiate your nervous system so that you can expand even more fully into the woman that you are supposed to be right now. The third action is rewriting the rules. We are going to trade good, for real. We are going to trade nice. For authentic. We are going to trade apologizing for allowing. We are going to trade apologizing for being hit with a ball at a playground to, yeah, that really hurt. And then letting them pick up their own ball, letting them find their own dance bag, letting them set up their own party, letting them, I'm gonna bring in the spirit of Mel Robbins. You knew it was coming. We're gonna let them, and then we're gonna let us. And part of it is yes, letting them, but the masterclass is about part two. Let me. Let me notice when I'm asking myself, am I being nice? And you're gonna switch that to, am I being true to myself? Am I being clear? Am I being brave? Am I being authentic to who I am? Because if not, you're drowning in your own good girl conditioner. Huh? See what I did there, right? And those three steps are how you begin to detox your inner good girl conditioning. So just in case you are driving and you're ready to write this down, number one, you're gonna notice and name it, and you're asking, whose rules am I following, who says, so number two, you're gonna interrupt the pattern by doing one small, audacious, rebellious thing every single day. One small thing, and you're teaching your nervous system that being in your own power is safe. And number three, you get to rewrite your own rules. Whose rules are you following yours. Now that you're awake at the wheel, you get to decide, do I wanna be nice or do I wanna be kind, which means clear and direct and true? Do I wanna be gracious or do I wanna make 50,000 more dollars this year? What do we really want? If it's not$50,000, you probably have some good girl conditioning going on over the hood. And we don't detox the inner girl, good girl, by burning life down, okay? That's not what the assignment is. I don't want you to like sling off your bra and set everything on fire and go run around naked, FF the patriarchy. I like to do that, but that's not the assignment. The assignment is to get clear on who you are, on what you want, and then allow yourself, give yourself the permission. To ask for it, to require it to raise your standard for it and to remember it, and then you practice one. Small thing a day. We're saying yes to what we love. We're saying no to what we don't, and we are not under any circumstances, allowing ourselves to feel shame or guilt for wanting more money, wanting more peace, wanting more healing, wanting better sex, wanting more time. All of those things if you want them. That's your assignment Desire. Literally means from the spirit, which means it's a spiritual assignment that you've been giving given when it comes out of your heart, what would I love? Okay, so that feels like enough for today. If you're listening before November 13th, you need to get in that masterclass. Get yourself a seat. Yes, there will be a limited time replay. If you're listening after November 13th. You need to get access to this masterclass. Hopefully it will be available to you in some form or the other. You can just DM me, detox, and I'll know what you're talking about. In the masterclass, which is called, I love this title'cause I created it, the Good Girl Detox, shatter Ceilings, ditch Perfectionism, and Create Your Next Level Success. Because that is our assignment here, we're detoxing the patriarchy from our bones, from our trying to be nice and not hurt anybody. Feelings from trying to look cute and be smart and do everything right, but still never feel like we're enough. We gotta be done with that. Shattering the ceilings that we've likely created for ourselves and each other. We're ditching the idea that we need to be perfect in any way. I hope you, I don't edit most of the podcast. Unless I like, I can't even remember. I pull out some little words, ums and likes and all that stuff, and that really just started happening. I hope you hear the gorgeous imperfection in the podcast every week because perfectionism is a weapon of the patriarchy, and it's so boring. It's so boring. Nobody likes somebody. That's perfect. You know somebody on Instagram who's trying to be perfect. Do you like her? No, you don't. No you don't. So we're gonna be talking about that in the masterclass, and we're gonna be using those things detoxing, the inner good girls, shattering the ceilings we've likely created for ourselves. Ditching the idea that we need to be perfect so that we can create success. What does that look like? Go to your heart and ask, it's the brokerage that you wanna start, but you can't'cause you're too scared. It's the book you wanna write, but you can't'cause you can't make time to sit down and write it.'cause who would read it anyway? It's the money that you're scared to ask for, but that is available to you if you only show up. And to ask with confidence. It's the partnership that is available for you if you can get over yourself and get back in the dating game. All of that is next level success. Whatever it is that your heart is dreaming about, that is for you on the other side of your good girl detox. And in that masterclass we're gonna go really deep into why we as a society are creating so much. Why we as women are creating and doing and thinking and planning so much, and we still feel exhausted. We're gonna learn how to unhook from all that bullshittery of the patriarchy. And I'm gonna teach you the exact framework I use and I have used myself to help women reclaim their power step out of their good girl conditioning and step into their wise woman empowered and her g. So I'm gonna see you this Thursday, right? 12:00 PM Central. You wanna be there live because that's where the magic happens. Yes, there'll be a replay, it's not as fun. So tell your meeting. You can't make it. Call in sick. Do whatever you need to do because this masterclass just might change your life. I'm dropping the link to join in the show notes. You can find it on Instagram. You can DM me specifically. There's a text in the show notes, and I want you to get in that masterclass. Then I want you to send it to the most, the women that you love the most in your life. Because if you are a woman taking a breath, trying to create something really special and big and powerful in this life, you are likely. Also experiencing good girl conditioning, and can we be done with that? Can we be done with that? We can't until we start with those three steps, until we come together as a community, until we learn what we need to know, who we need to be, and what we need to do to expand into our next level of success. Okay, because I wanna tell you something. You are not designed to stay small. You are not designed to be nice. You are not designed to shrink and be pretty in the patriarchal dress that someone put on you, you recovered and you are taking this breath on in your life's journey because you are designed to create the assignment that's on your heart, and that means you get to rise, you've got to rise, you get to be wealthy. Full spectrum wealth in every area that matters. You get to be radiant and you get to be. Unapologetically alive in a life that feels so good, everyone around you gets turned on because of how sexy and powerful it is. So get in the masterclass and open your heart and hear this from mine. I love you. I'm so proud of you. This is gonna be a blast. I believe in your ability to detox this in inner good girl conditioning and create a powerful wisdom filled life that you are obsessed with. Wow. We'll see you in the masterclass November 13th at 12:00 PM Central. Bye. Oh, whoa. Did you just feel what I felt? There is a whole lot of that and more to help you create miracles in your life. On upcoming episodes of the Girls Who Recover a podcast now ranked in the top 5% of podcasts globally. If you've built a strong recovery foundation and you're feeling ready to break through life's glass ceilings, let's make it happen together. In the show notes, you'll find a link to book a free one-on-one conversation with me and in that conversation. We'll get clear on what next level success even looks like for your life. We'll create some powerfully aligned goals and a plan. We're gonna talk about the big thing holding you back, and you will walk away with a roadmap for how to create a life you are obsessed with. Because hear this from me, my friend. You deserve. Success and freedom and the full identity of a woman who knows what she's capable of and who she is. And I wanna help you get there. So book your free call in the notes. And if you love this episode, follow us five stars, write a review, share it with your best friend, share it with your mom. And in case you haven't heard it today, I love you. I'm so proud of you, and I believe in your ability to create a gorgeous life. You are madly in love with starting. Right now and I'll see you in the next episode, blah.