Pat Harvey on DBT and Strategies for Parenting Emotionally Intense Teens

Parenting a differently wired child can be challenging and as I sat down with my guest, clinical social worker Pat Harvey, to have this conversation, I wanted to acknowledge and validate the experiences we have as parents as much as we do the same for our kids. As you’ll hear from Pat, her work centers around helping parents navigate raising kids who have highly intense emotions …the kind of emotions that can cause big disruptions at home. 

In this conversation, Pat talks about her book Parenting a Teen Who has Intense Emotions, how she supports families using Dialectical Behavior Therapy or DBT, the three priorities within the DBT framework, some of the critical things to understand to effectively parent emotionally intense kids, and where to start if you are looking for more support for yourself. 

Chapters

• 4:51 Pat Harvey shares her story, how she came to be doing this work, and why she wrote her book
• 10:51 Pat explains what DBT (Dialetic Behavioral Therapy)
• 14:15 How parents set "goals" for their kids and the hoped-for outcomes as a result of doing DBT
• 21:10 Pat explains why DBT can be so effective for teens who are engaged in especially risky behaviors
• 23:38 What it looks like when Pat works with parents whose kids don't go to or aren't "bought into" the therapeutic process
• 26:47 What "effective parenting" looks like for parents whose teens are very intense and/or engaging in dangerous or risky behavior
• 29:29 What Pat sees as the biggest roadblock for parents to lean into the DBT parenting approach
• 33:03 Pat shares suggestions for where parents can start if they are raisign kids who are emotionally and behaviorally intense