Therapy with Men and Boys: A Guide for Clinicians

Episode 07: "Was that Appropriate?" Navigating Sexualized Comments from Male Clients

Therapy with Men and Boys

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0:00 | 41:25

Female therapists face unique challenges when male clients make sexualized comments—whether overt advances, suggestive language, or subtle seductive tones. These moments can rupture the therapeutic alliance and trigger countertransference, making it difficult to maintain boundaries while keeping the conversation therapeutic and shame-free.

In this episode, Drs. Erica Liebman and David Shepard interview Dr. Ali Shames-Dawson, Director of Education at Therapists of New York and expert in men’s sexuality. Dr. Shames-Dawson helps female clinicians navigate sexual dynamics in treatment, offering practical strategies to understand men’s sexualized behavior and model effective boundary-setting language.

She demonstrates how to protect yourself while keeping male clients feeling safe, set firm limits without shaming, and transform boundary violations into deeply therapeutic opportunities. Her approach is both no-nonsense about what’s unacceptable and compassionate in exploring the deeper meanings behind sexualized comments—helping clinicians turn challenging moments into powerful clinical work.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​