Becoming More Joyfully You: Play, Creativity and Risk | Amy Dickens

FOR EPISODE LINKS & MORE INFO VISIT: https://samhorton.co/blog/ep103

When was the last time you truly played… not to achieve, not to improve, not to produce… but simply to feel alive?

Many women spend years focused on responsibility, productivity, and self-improvement, only to find themselves disconnected from joy, creativity, and their inner spark. In this heartfelt conversation, we explore why play is not frivolous, but essential to wellbeing, creativity, and living authentically.

3 Powerful Benefits of Listening

• Understand why play is a powerful gateway to creativity, healing, and personal growth
 • Learn why fear, judgement, and busyness keep so many women disconnected from joy
 • Discover gentle ways to reconnect with the playful, expressive part of yourself

Key Takeaways

• Why play is a powerful catalyst for creativity and new ideas
 • The difference between consuming self-help and embodying transformation
 • How fear of judgement and rejection keeps many women stuck
 • Why reconnecting with childhood joys can reveal powerful clues about your creative essence
 • The relationship between play, nervous system regulation, and emotional wellbeing
 • Why taking small risks leads to growth, expansion, and deeper self-trust
 • How community and shared experiences amplify joy and healing
 • The importance of spaciousness and creativity in a productivity-driven world
 • Why joy is not a destination but a compass
 • A powerful reflection question to reconnect with your true self

Reflection Question

Who would you become if you chose your joy more often… and what small step could you take toward that today? 

FOR EPISODE LINKS & MORE INFO VISIT: https://samhorton.co/blog/ep103

Transcript

Ep 103 Amy Dickens

[00:00:00]

So today I have Amy Dickens with me. Amy is a leading voice on joy play, and reconnecting with the parts of ourselves that make us feel most alive. She hosts the podcast joyfully you. Where her mission is to help adults rediscover the transformative power of joy and play, not as something frivolous, but as a vital part of wellbeing, creativity, and authentic living.

Amy also shares her message through her new book, 101 Ways to Spread Joy. So welcome, Amy. Ah, thanks so much for having me here. I, your voice is absolutely delightful. It feels like a exhale. I'm like, oh. Like, have you ever thought of like reading, like stories, something? I'm just, my microphone. It's like very like grounding and relaxing.

I'm like, I love this. We're gonna have a great time. Awesome. Um, thank you. So let's start with your story. Amy, tell us about your journey and how joy and play have become such a big part of your life and your purpose. Absolutely. Yeah. [00:01:00] I constantly am meeting people and they were like, you must have just been born this way.

You were just like bursting with energy at the seams and like galavanting around talking to everybody in the room. And of, I, I, of course, I think there, there was, you know, like I was born with like a spark and it was there. Mm-hmm. But for most of my life it was really quite hidden under a lot of pain and suffering and a lot of anxiety and social anxiety that was like.

Not your average every day. It's really intense where I really couldn't talk to anybody other than my partner, and my life was very small and I felt terrified of everything. Like I felt like everything was giving me panic attacks. At some point, I would get depressed and my nervous system was just jacked.

I was just, mm-hmm. Had no idea what to do. But there was that little. Still small voice within that always said it gets so much better. I don't really, and that I don't know how, but I know that it did and I'm so grateful for those, that voice and that I would listen to it and then, you know, it would go away some days and, and feel so [00:02:00] just.

I have no idea, you know, that nee moment of like, how, what do you want from me? But it planted a hunger inside of me of how can I walk through this darkness towards a light that I can't even see to, to know that it's there. And I just would read all of the books and I really went the like, oh, I don't know anyone, so I'm just gonna.

Read like 80 books a year and take all the online courses and start meditating and doing yoga, and did the yoga teacher training and really got, I i, I was an achiever growing up, you know, and then that the good straight A student becomes into the good worker be at, you know, all the places that I would work at.

And I really applied to that, I think to my self-help journey as well of like, Hmm, how can I get all the gold stars and read all the things do exactly as I'm supposed to do? And it did help, of course, you know, you start meditating, you know, start taking deep breaths and you start. Making changes to your patterns and you do change.

But I reached a plateau in that after a, a decent amount of years [00:03:00] where I wasn't getting any better and I was still struggling, you know, I was so much better than I had been. I wasn't, you know, living in like a. Dark pit of despair, but something wasn't shifting anymore. And that, that's always like a call to, you know, kinda like the hero's journey.

I don't know if you're familiar with that, but I feel like when, when things aren't working, it's this, this call to expand into the unknown. And I'm always so grateful for that moment where I said, okay, I am gonna just start following my joy. I don't know what that even looks like. I've never had, being a people pleaser and achiever, I didn't really know what that looked like for me very much.

And, um, certainly breaking up with my partner of 11 years wasn't the thing that I was like, eh, this will bring me joy. He's like the light of my life. But there was something that I think I needed to choose me in that and, and have that season, that permission slip of, oh, whoa, I didn't even recognize how much.

All of my decisions were being made in in reference to this other human until like that [00:04:00] person wasn't even in my life anymore. And then it just led to me like. Okay, I'm gonna start booking one way tickets around the world, because that's what I'd always wanted to do. And you know, doing like different yoga teacher trainings and all different kinds of facilitator trainings and started like teaching dance workshops and play workshops and all of these things that a year beforehand were.

Unfathomable to me. Mm mm But I kind of was just following the things that felt equally exciting and terrifying and then burning all of like the bridges and boats to any past life that I could and, and then that one year I really transformed. Into a completely different person. And then, you know, I've had to slow down and it's been so sweet to in, in this season, be like, wow, okay, I'm living in one place and I'm building community and I'm tapping into much more simple joys of mm-hmm.

Okay. I'm not constantly flooding myself with, I don't know, spontaneity and you're traveling in, traveling there and, you know, it's high highs, low lows with that kind of lifestyle. But um, [00:05:00] it's been a really beautiful journey to see how my joy. Can shift so much over time, but it, it constantly is my compass, uh, to becoming who it is that I came here to be.

And, and now I'm really, I think expanding that to reminding myself and other people that spreading joy and like. Taking it from, okay. Yeah. I like allowing myself to let my joy be my north star in my life, but also inspiring that and other people because we can all make a ripple effect and, uh, it's just been so fun.

Beautiful. So good. So do you think that you were a joyful child? Um, do you think that you had that at the beginning or is it never really there and it's something that you've act actually had to reach for in life? You know, I would say I've always been a goofy human. Like I, I've always had that little goofball inside of me, but I was also a very anxious little kid.

Okay. It wasn't a word that I, I really had for that. I, I often would, um, walk around saying I'm bored. I, and looking back, I'm like, oh, I wasn't [00:06:00] bored. I was feeling anxious, but I didn't have the word to describe that feeling. And the only word that I, my little kid brain had was, I'm feeling bored, I think.

Yeah. Yeah. Um, so I think it really stifled a lot of that. The bigness of it, it would, people would call me a jack in the box a lot of times 'cause I would be very silent and you know, like not ruffling any feathers and just kind of being invisible mostly. And then if you really got to know me, I would be like, okay, awesome.

So I mean, um. Scrolling through your Instagram before I'd met you, because obviously now I can see you and hear you. Um, I, I, yeah, I feel it even more, but when I was scrolling through your Instagram, I couldn't help thinking that your, the play looks like this superpower to you, Mm-hmm. So is play your superpower?

That's my next question. I love that question. I think. I think it might be one of 'em. And it, which is, is so funny because I spent my whole decade of my twenties on this hunt [00:07:00] for my superpower or my gift or my purpose is, and I was like, am I the only one that wasn't bored with this gift or purpose a superpower?

I'm the forgotten one. And was like so dramatic about it and I'd like try and read all the books and it was like, whoa. Who knew that it wasn't something that I was like seeing, I was looking for it in people that I was seeing around me, and I had no idea that I just needed to kinda give myself more and more permission slips to be myself.

And the more I could do that and do the inner healing as well to, you know, feel comfortable doing that, I'm like, oh wow. Being playful and, and, uh, what did someone said, um. Oh gosh, what she, oh, she said, you have the gift to animate people. And I was like, wow, I've never heard it worded like that. I can really see that animation in real time.

I noticed that people, I'm like, I'm in a choir and it has like 80 to 60 people and we all like walk around the room singing these songs and it's been very fascinating to notice over the past [00:08:00] year or so, people will. Walk in front of me and then I can see them like meet up and they're goofy with me 'cause I'm dancing around the whole time.

And then they kind of like go back to their normal, you know, whatever their normal expression is. I'm, wow. I guess I have an effect on people. Huh?

Oh my goodness. So the word play has like a real childlike tone to it. So tell us a bit about your thoughts on the association with play and childhood and why play is actually important for all ages. Yeah, it's something that I love to talk about also because people see me and they're like, oh my God, you're just the quintessential like billboard of this is what play looks like.

And I wanna say that play looks different for everyone, you know, because play, um, Stewart Brown, he is a doctor that did all of his research on play for the last, I don't know how many decades. And he's found incredible stuff. But the way that he has defined it through understanding all of the benefits of it [00:09:00] deeply is that.

Play is basically really similar to flow in a lot of ways. Mm-hmm. In that it's. What, whatever you are doing as an individual where, where time ceases to exist and you're just completely absorbed in whatever you're doing. And I, I mean, I think that we also have this association with it having some sense of levity or, you know, enthusiasm or, I don't know, connection or whatever that might be.

But, but the way that he just. Finds it is really those two things of time isn't existing and you're totally involved in it, which can be so different for so many of us. 'cause I think some of us can feel like we're playing when others of us aren't. You know, we could be doing, like you and I could be doing the same task and I could be like, I wanna spoon my eyeballs out and you could be like this.

I like doing this forever. So I always love to start with that because I wanna. Give people the permission slip always to play and to just, you know, be yourself and to explore what that looks like, but [00:10:00] to not force yourself necessarily to put yourself in the box of anyway, it needs to look like how Amy's playing.

Because yeah, that might not be how you play and that's okay. You know, some people are. Really adventurous and they need a lot of like adrenaline sinky activities to mm-hmm. You know, be jumping out of a plane or something to feel like they're playing and other people wanna feel a little more like in a detailed tinkering kind of thing.

And yeah, our childhood really leaves a lot of clues to that, you know, if we're. In a season of life where, wow, I don't even know where to start. Like what does it even mean for me to play? I, it is been so long, I can't even remember. Think about the things that you loved to do as a kid. 'cause obviously we all, you know, I'm sure did certain things with certain friends.

You're like, eh, it wasn't really my cup of tea, but the things that you did that really. You loved it like you were in your own little world. Like kids can get, they can get there fast. A lot of times of, whoa, like my imagination's taking over and everything else [00:11:00] is ceasing to exist and it doesn't have to be, you know, tit for tat the same exact.

Thing that you did, but it can be a clue as to, oh, I was really playing this imaginary game of exploring through nature and all these, like that's where I was like really in my playful state. Like, oh, maybe I just need to like go on a walk in the woods. You know, I don't need to go on this whole like epic adventure of like, I don't know, playing with fairies or whatever it would be that you did as a kid, but noticing certain elements and allowing yourself to experiment and explore and.

I, I often still to do this, but definitely on my path to rediscovering my joy and my play. There was a lot of trial and error, a lot of trying certain things and sometimes being like, Hmm, that didn't quite land, huh? We don't need to really, we don't need to keep doing that one. That was okay, but other things you do and you're, wow, that filled my cup

Like, that's lighting me up that did something. And it doesn't have to be. [00:12:00] It doesn't have to. I think in our to-do list, to-do list oriented culture where it's like productivity obsessed and you know, efficiency, sometimes the most efficient thing that we can do for our brains and our creativity to think, you know, smarter, not harder, is to just play for the play.

But there's so many different benefits that, you know, like of kids playing, but also adults playing of the cre, the creativity that it. Creates in your brain and the spaciousness and the new connections that you're making, that if you just are forcing yourself to be really focused and like one linear way of thinking, you're not allowing this whole other part of your being to kind of come forth.

Mm-hmm. It's pretty difficult for some people to access that though, do you think? Yeah. So, you know, as adults, you know, what do you see the biggest struggles, you know, with accessing that playful, creative part, um, of ourselves? Yeah, I, I, I mean, I'm sure it is so different for so many people. I [00:13:00] host a joy parade every week where I get people dancing in the streets.

I have like a big boombox kind of coming through with like, you know, corny oldies. Playing and I'm just getting people like doing very simple, silly dances and inviting people, like a bunch of random strangers, basically to play. And it's very interesting to see how many people I can see. 'cause certain people I'm like, oh, they're just like really not into this.

Like I don't need to interact with 'em. Like certain people can like see a mile away, like, okay, like we will just walk past you. We don't even interact. But other people you can see they're not interacting with and they're like almost trying not to make eye contact but want to. And you can see this like push pull happening within them of, mm-hmm.

I wanna play, but I'm scared to play. I'm scared maybe of somebody judging me or things like that. So I think certain people are, are fearful and I, that one, I think I also really can resonate with of so much of my life. Really feeling this stuck, keeping myself stuck in the sidelines of not feeling safe to say, yes, to let loose.[00:14:00]

To let loose. And you know, part of my story is the big fear of like rejection. So I think that that's a really common fear for a lot of people is I don't wanna be judged, I don't wanna be rejected. 'cause most humans wanna feel a sense of belonging and a lot of us haven't walked that journey of finding a sense of belonging in like our self or even a community at large.

You know, I think that there is a larger tolerance for risk when you even have. Some community like you might not even be with your community, but you're feel like, whoa, I have my homies or my family, or some group of people that I can come back to when I'm at this thing out here that I think I can take more risks actually, because I have a space where I'm feeling resourced in my sense of belonging and with our loneliness epidemic right now.

I think that we're all just really struggling a lot with. That of just this human nature to belong and be communal. And, and, you know, there's a, there's a sense that we need to take risks though to, to [00:15:00] heal that. You know, I, I think that a lot of times that the titration of that, you know, how can I walk along the edge of my comfort zone?

Mm-hmm. Um, and the other, the one, another big reason would be not seeing the value in it. Not seeing the value in play. You know, I think that we can really value. Output things. You know, it's like this, when I do this task, it's really clearly related to like my work or I don't Yeah. How much money I make.

Yeah. It's, you know, it's helping my house. Right. Do you think, do, do you think that there's like, um, such a thing as that's just sparked as you were kind of, you know, I love it talking away there, but do you think there's such a thing as kind of introverted play versus extroverted play? Yes. Does it always need to be like on the outside visible and in your face?

Absolutely. Yeah. Definitely, yeah. And I definitely have both of those sides of myself as well and I'm feeling it's becoming winter over here, so I'm definitely noticing that there's this, uh, lesson that I think I'm also working through right [00:16:00] now of like, I've been like in this big season previously of like.

Being pushed to like be the more extroverted play. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Um, but I was also like living alone, so I think I was like naturally just spending so much time by myself. Yeah. And like working alone and doing all the things. It was like, oh, now I have, I live with my best friend and like I have much more community.

So I think that there's this natural, and it's winter, the days are short, and I'm noticing that my cup is being filled by, I'm calling it romanticizing my life. Like just putting on some like music and a candle and just like creating and just like, I'll sit there with mm-hmm. Stuff and just create art just for the sake of it.

I mean, this wall also, you know, I just like woke cool Saturday morning and just said, I'm gonna throw brand exercise. I've never done that before. And I had, it was just like, oh, this exercise of like free will a little bit of. Huh. If I hate it, I'll paint over it, but I like it. So we're good. So let's talk.

But yeah, there's people. Yeah. So let's talk a bit about like the relationship then between play, play and [00:17:00] creativity. I know you sort of touched on it before, but I kind of see play as a really vital component to like truly authentic, you know, soulful creativity where we feel really connected to our creative practice.

So what are your thoughts around the connection between play and creativity? Yeah. I think that when we're connected to play, we're connected to our truth of like who we are as a being a soul, like our I essence, so that whatever we're creating, because we can create, we can create like all the time, you know?

But I think a lot of us maybe might create out of shoulds or you know, just like misaligned priorities or whatever it might be. But there is a difference I think when we're creating something that is. Refueling us. You know, that we all, I think, have experienced doing something where I'm creating this thing and it's draining me.

It's draining my creativity, my energy, all of it. And then I might even be putting more energy into this thing over here. But when I do it, somehow I'm feeling even [00:18:00] more ideas are coming to me and I'm feeling more excitement, and I'm feeling like maybe even my body might get like exhausted at a certain point.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. But I'm feeling like. Fulfilled or re-energized in a different kind of way. And when we're in that sense of play, yes, uh, whether we're creating the thing actively or carving out space where it's not even anything to do with what we're trying to create. It is helping to refuel us. I always call, it's kind of like the gas station kind of thing, where we need to create spaces for, you know, just not.

Being only in productive mode. Yeah, I was just listening to actually the book, um, essentialism again. 'cause I'm always like putting too many things on my plate and he was, and it was just fascinating to me, like hearing about, I don't know, like Bill Gates and all of these like big, you know, CEO level dudes that have like, I don't know more on their plate than I could ever fathom.

It, they carve either like every day or like huge weeks out where they're like, I'm gonna do like nothing [00:19:00] else other than, you know, like give myself space. Yeah. Spaciousness to just be how that's allowing them to create and think and, and like have space to. Come up with new ideas and actually be like a little more creative and strategic, and to have new connections that can be created that if we're just like kind of stuck in the, the grind and the hamster wheel that a lot of us get caught in of, okay, like just one foot in front of the other, next, next, next, next, next.

But when you can kind of allow yourself to. Laugh and be jovial and playful and connected to your creativity. You can kind of see almost, whoa, okay, I'm taking a step back, actually this is what I can do. Yeah. Or this is like a third door over here that I wasn't even seeing as an option, but because I've activated my brain and my body in a different way.

'cause that's also the other thing with play is that it puts ourself, it primes our body in a different physiological state. So, you know, there's all this mindset work, but I'm really mm-hmm. Big on. Mm-hmm. Body [00:20:00] is a much faster way after, you know, over half of a decade, really like focusing on like mindset, mindset, mindset.

I'm like, this isn't working. What is going on? Yeah. And when we're moving our body in a certain way, like a more playful kind of way, it is, you know, all the dopamine and serotonin and oxytocin and endorphins are just firing off, which is helping you come up with different creative ideas. Sure. It's helping you naturally be primed for whatever you go into in that state.

To come up with different ideas and ways of thinking or just inter different ways of interacting with someone. Mm-hmm. And you can have, in my experience, like so many different serendipitous moments of connection with random people that can even lead to like a different opportunity. But if I'm like kind of closed off or Yeah.

I don't know my best self, I don't tend to have those kind of moments kind of thing. Yeah. Yeah. Um, yeah, there's a lot of different magic moments that it can lead to. Mm. Really helping you lean into curiosity. Yeah, absolutely. So we talked about it a little bit before you mentioned the word risk, you know, so, so [00:21:00] my question to you is, is there risk involved in cultivating more joy and play in our lives, and what's the payoff to that risk?

Yeah, I, you know, I feel like I didn't really realize the level of risk maybe before I really wrote my book and was like re-editing it and I was reading through it and, you know, you're, you're reflecting a lot in that whole process of writing and editing and rereading and all the things, and you're like, wow, I've never like looked at this many words inside and out this many times.

And I realized, wow, I, I'm asking people to do some risky things that I, you know, myself, I'm not asking anyone to do anything that I haven't, like, walked myself through. And, you know, in the past, you know, four years particularly, I'm like, wow. I, it is through allowing myself to say, okay, I'm gonna walk with this discomfort and proving to yourself, you know, it's really, it's really a joyful form of rejection therapy is essentially what I've realized it kind of is.

And realizing, wow, my world [00:22:00] has gotten so much bigger. Things feel so much. Easier things that used to feel just like terrifying, like everything used to scare me. I used to be scared to like order my food at a restaurant, and now I can just, like, I walked up to a stranger the other day and she was painting snowflakes on a wall, and I could see my mom just like wanted to paint a snowflake so bad.

I was like, I just have this random stranger, Hey, can my mom paint a snowflake on the wall with you? And she was like, yeah, absolutely. And she like taught my mom how to do it in my hands of the paint. And I'm like, wow. Okay. I guess like terrifying to me. Like, oh, what? Oh, they say no. And you know, most, 99% of the time it's not that scary.

And it's something I'm constantly having to rere remind myself. And you know, sometimes people do say no and sometimes it is not. So, you know, ideal. Yeah. But then other moments you can notice that, wow, oh, I'm really like creating a difference by. Leading into my own joy and becoming the person that I know lives within me.

Mm-hmm. I think this like sense of, a lot of us feel [00:23:00] called to, I'm meant for more. How do I become her? And if we're stuck inside of our comfort zone and like coddling ourselves all the time, I, I just don't, I haven't in my experience, like completely become them. I think there's a sense of like titration of can I?

Allow myself to like be soft and regulate and like cozy and you know, in my comfort zone. But then also be honest with myself and how do I wanna grow past those edges and what are the things that I'm avoiding doing? Mm-hmm. Because another part of me really wants to do it. And that I think is where I uses the discernment bit.

'cause I'm not here to tell anyone. Like what is right or wrong? Or you have to do this to like, you know, take this risk. It's you everyone. Like I'm so all about empowerment. Decide for yourself and learn through trial and error basically. What feels like a yes to me? What feels like a no to me? What does it feel like when something is like, oh my God, this lights up everything in my body to try and do this new scary thing.

But another part of me is actually a little bit scared and that's okay. And I don't have to go like full [00:24:00] steam ahead. I can like. Learn to kind of walk with that fear. Mm-hmm. But not let the kid be in the driver's seat and other times being like, you know what, that's a no for me. And that's okay. You know, there's, it's, we don't have to take every single risk that anyone else out there has ever done, and it's, it's a beautiful part of the journey, I think, of becoming ourselves to understand.

Okay. I got me. No one knows better than what's for me, than me. And I can trust when it's time for me to take the risk that feels right for me at this point in time. And maybe it the risk, I can feel like, yeah, I wanna do that. But not right now. Yeah, it's, I think sometimes things come up to me right now, I'm like, you know what?

Not that right now, but maybe that right now, you know? That sounds good. Yeah. But do you think when we've got this kind of like I idea that on the other side of the risk, you know, there's something that's really rewarding and I, you know what I was getting as you were sort of talking there was really the reward is growth.[00:25:00]

It's expansion and growth and some sort of transformation that's on the other side. So do you think it helps to have that kind of in mind as you are kind of, you know, jumping into the risk or you know, saying yes to the risk as well? You know, if you know that it's an opportunity for growth, is it easier?

Yeah, I, I mean definitely with any of this, I would say to the, the 'cause I'm recognizing now, for me, growth is my, part of my why. It's, it's one of the layers of your why, and I'm always reminding people that I work with that you have to have. A really, you don't have to, but it really helps to have a really grounded sense of what your why is.

Like what is that thing that instead of like something pushing you, you know, being like, you should do this. Yeah. It's like it pulls you, it's this level of, you know, do you really wanna be of service or do you really want to, I, whatever your why is that? And like, you know, the, the one that really. It strikes a chord with you specifically.

Mm-hmm. And, you know, there's, [00:26:00] there's so much depth that you could go into with that and kind of going like different layers on the why, you know, once you think you found it. Okay. Why that? Yeah. Yeah. And then why that, you know, until you find something like, oh, whoa, I, it's. That's my why and, and a huge part of the growth for me is 'cause I'm, I'm really, my, part of my why is I really wanna create ripples of impact and change and create a movement of joy around the world and kind of like an underlying layer of that.

Why is, I know I have to grow into that person. Like I, yeah. Sometimes can feel this huge gap between like the vision that I have for myself and what I'd love to create and the roles I'd love to step into. And like the version of me now. And I recognize, oh, I have to take some risks and I have to act in different ways and break certain patterns and do things that feel risky and uncomfortable and exciting and ah, and like, you know.

Skins and it's crunchy some moments and so fun and expansive other moments. Yeah. And it's reminded once you didn't have to do it all, get it. Right. Now I have my why, [00:27:00] like painted behind my um, desk right here and I'm like, look, all the time, you know, I'm like, okay. Right. When things feel hard, go back to that.

But you don't have to do them all at once. You can do them, you know, no, gradually and slowly and in your own time. You know, it doesn't have to be a, it's absolutely what I'm learning right now is don't do all the things at once, actually have like priority, not priorities, you know? So what's the big biggest risk you've taken towards more joy?

I mean, definitely I think the first biggest risk that I really took, well, there's so many. I mean, I sold all my stuff and I into a van and then I broke up with like my fiance and we were like, had been together for 11 years and like he was like my everything. And there, there's been a lot of, a lot of different risks of realizing a lot of times that, and a lot of times the risk was really painful in the moment and like really it wasn't like.

Immediate, like, yeah. Sunshine, rainbows. Yeah. Uh, a [00:28:00] lot of times the risk was really big ones were letting go of a lot of things, different relationships. Kind of like wiping the slate of my life completely clean and saying, okay. It feels like in my gut that this is really painful, but that this is the, the right choice for me.

And, you know, you go through all the grief and losing yourself and, and then recognizing, oh, okay, I'm redefining who I am and, and letting go of that old life was allowing me to kind of have that. Like a new, uh, like set of watercolors or something, like a whole new medium almost to paint on the canvas of my life kind of thing, to create a more joyful life in a whole different way than I had been fathoming before.

And Sure, in so many ways, I've lived like a bazillion different lives. I was driving down the street today and we saw a bunch of like carpenter, and I was like, wow. I had a little carpentry stint. Like, what was I thinking? Like why was I doing that? Mm-hmm. And I [00:29:00] think sometimes when I get like a little off track like that, it's like, you know, you get the, the nuggets of wisdom to say, Hey, go rewrite your life, and then you have to let go of all the things you're like, what's going on.

But sometimes that, um, can be the most fruitful towards taking those big risks and leaps. Yeah. So what's the long term, you know, benefit then to our wellbeing for choosing, you know, this, this path of risk taking and play and more joy? Yeah. I mean, I think that if we are not actively choosing on some level, like the truth of ourself, you know, choosing our joy and our play, which can look a bazillion different ways, you know, I think joy can look like, oh, Amy's like smiling, and she like, is so out and like expressive.

But there's also the, the softer, like more contented joy that you can see of just like. Wonder just looking out the window at the trees in the morning or, I don't know. [00:30:00] I'm constantly just like look up if I, if I just look up like often when I'm outside, not not inside. It's not the same outside. It really hits of wow, connecting to that true essence of yourself.

And a lot of us are, I think, struggling because we start to live a life that feels. Distant from our truth of who we really are. Mm-hmm. And I think that there's so many different paths. Like I'm not, I'm like joy and play is a path that I'm here to like scream from the rooftop and be like, this is an incredible thing.

But I'm never here to say like, this is the only the one path. Like there's in a million different paths to. Being true to yourself and who you really are and being honest with making choices and alignment with that and being in alignment with the purpose you came here to share and all of the, all of the beautiful gifts of the puzzle piece that you are.

I'm like every person in this earth I think of as a puzzle piece, as they have these gifts and these superpowers and if they are being honest and true and like as embodied as they can in that moment with who that is, it kind of can click in with all of the other puzzle [00:31:00] pieces in the world and kind of create a beautiful tapestry of.

Making the world a better place. So kind of, you know, the joy and the play, I think is the, the best way that I've found for myself and many other people to both create that pathway to who we are truly feeling and like, whoa, this is the real me. And then from that also spreading and joy and creating the world that we wish to live in, kind of.

Mm-hmm. You know, by being who I really am, I can actually go walk my talk and kind of create ripples of change and impact and, you know, make, make impact and change in the streets, in, you know, how you interact with strangers and, and knowing that it can make invisible impact that you will never see. Mm.

And so how do you think that people really make, you know, this kind of way of thinking and this approach to, you know, to living? How do we make it more of a priority? You know, when, when [00:32:00] life is so busy and there's so many things to do, you know, how do we, how do we do that? Yeah, I mean, definitely I would circle that back to understanding how it's like linked into your why, so whatever for each individual.

Like if you're like, I really feel like it's important for my kids to create a better tomorrow or to be able to really. Give them the best future and the best life, or to just show up for them, for example. Mm-hmm. Like understanding that, wow, okay. If I'm filling my cup and, and also just re resourcing myself, I'm gonna show up different in all of my relationships and every single interaction that I have.

I think we all know that we show up different when we're feeling like really like stressed and depleted versus when we're feeling like. Resourced and my cup is filled, and maybe something else might have to like shift. Maybe it is a little, I'm definitely a constantly learning time management of, okay, what can I like, systemize, delegate, you know, automize or just completely cut out, you know, and, [00:33:00] uh, kind of those kinds of things.

And how can I simplify my life at the same time and not make it this whole like, oh my God, I'm spinning like. 900,000 plates and I keep adding more. Yeah. Yeah. It, it is, I think when we maybe get down to the truth of who it is that we wanna be and how it is that we wanna show up in our relationships. And for, you know, most people when you, you know, and those studies where it's like, oh, all the people on their deathbed, like, what was the thing that.

They, they regretted or what mattered most. And a lot of times it was, I spent so much time at work, spent so much time like on things that didn't really matter and I didn't spend enough time with the people I loved. And, you know, being that person that they deserved as well. Um, and I think that remembering that for me also, 'cause I can, I'm not perfect.

I'm so human. I can totally get caught up in not walking my talk some days. Yeah. And being stressed out and then I can remember things like that. I'm like, wow, I wanna show up. This world different for my mission, [00:34:00] different for my friends and family as this person, because I, I wanna be that person. And I think like the world deserves that version of Me too.

Yeah. So what are your favorite practices then, in terms of, you know, cultivating more play and joy? What are your personal practices that you go to go back to all the time? Yeah, for me, I mean I was a dancer growing up and I had like a whole breakup with dance 'cause I was a competitive dancer and it was honestly a very toxic environment.

Mm-hmm. So for years I didn't do it and it's been so nice the past, I don't know, like seven or so years, getting more and more back into that. And recently I'm like, wow. That's one of those things where I look back at my childhood and I'm like, well, what did you love doing? I love dancing. I love dancing.

Like not to look cool or like. Look like. Oh yeah. She just like, nobody's watching it like a complete goof and just having the music so loud, I'm like, that's like the thing that I think when I force myself to do it, when I'm like in that like, Ugh, I'm grumpy, or I don't have [00:35:00] time. I'm like, just do one or two dances and then you don't have to keep going, but just try it.

Like 95% of the time, I'm so glad that I, I made myself do the thing. And then there's that 5% of the time where you're like, wow, you know what? I just need to feel my not so fun feelings right now. And, and that's okay. You know? Yeah. But that's dancing, singing, and anything with my friends. I, I've always been someone that just adores my friends.

They just crack me up. I love like, making them laugh. That's also something that I'm like, ah. That's just, just the best. Um, and then I get to mix all of those things together when I host this joy parade that I host every week, where we just get people dancing through the streets and singing and having a good time and just doing like the YMCA as we like walk through downtown.

And it's just so fun. It's literally. The light of my life right now. So for all the women who are curious about infusing more play and joy into their [00:36:00] lives, what powerful message or question would you like to leave them with today? Hmm. Wow. Who would you be if you chose your joy today or in like five years from now?

Which I'm like, wow, I've never even said that question. I'm like, I wanna write that down. Like, I don't wanna imagine myself before, but I'm like, I wanna like journal about that after I get off this. Yeah. Who would you be like, you know, like, no. Filter. Just allow yourself to really be honest. Like, if you let your joy take the lead and, and be the compass in your life, what different choices would you make?

Mm. And you know, not like letting yourself be like, no one else ever has to see this. Like, maybe write it down and just say, okay, I don't even have to do any of these things. If there was. Sky's the limit. Like what does that look like? And allowing yourself to just recognize that and maybe you wanna like, make some of the big things a little smaller at first to make it a little more digestible.

Um, and knowing that a lot of times I've also discovered that doing joy [00:37:00] things together and I've had so many periods of my life where I've had no one and it's caused me to have to make those brave moments of like, okay, I'm gonna like reach out and make a friend and hopefully find new people. There's something about, I don't, there's something about humans that we just love to share experiences.

We just, I think it just, we just naturally, it's like, oh, you know, something exciting happens to us and we like wanna like pick up the phone and like share that joy that we're experiencing with somebody else or also with like our sorrows and all of the things and all of our enjoyments. How can we as women, I think build connection with each other and build.

Like, kinda like lift each other up, I guess is, is where the community of can we get together and you know, maybe like I'm not feeling up down or I'm not feeling so like up one day, but you know, so if I can lean on somebody else and we can like kinda borrow my belief and you, you've got this like we can like kind of shift each other's states together rather than, you know, I think a lot of times.

It feels much more comfortable to like [00:38:00] complain or connect through like negative things. Like how does that shift our relationships and our relating and how close we can actually feel. Not that we can never, you know, like complain or like be honest, vulnerable, but sometimes I can be in certain spaces and it feels like people just wanna, it feels safe for people to connect over like what's going wrong rather than.

Yeah, what's going right? Yeah. Yeah. That's beautiful actually. I really like that. So, so how can people get to know you better, Amy, and get a real feel for the work that you're doing? Oh, yeah. You can follow me on social media at the Amy Dickens, on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, um, or if you wanna like, just check out what else is going on in my world.

livejoyfullyou.com. I got. All of different kind of things going on. I got a sweet little newsletter, um, and you can find the first 10 pages of my book there for free. Mm-hmm. A hundred Ways to Spread Joy. Um, you can sign up for that and get a little. Taste of it and you're like, oh, I want more of this.[00:39:00]

It's, it's a really sweet, like rainbow filled. Yeah. Beautiful People read that. I designed, 'cause I'm like, you know, a lot of people don't have that much time and, and it's like, it could be a bathroom reader, you know, that you could just keep in there next to your bed and you just read like a page here and there.

You could read it front to back. You could like flip to a random thing and let. Everything you open to inspire you that day or however you want to have it on the journey. And it also has, um, a little breakdown of how you can kind of create a little joy spreading club together of like, literally like step by step if you wanna like completely follow it of like, this is how you like, get the people together and this is how you, like you do this and this and this, and here's some games you can play and here's some activities.

You or you can do none of it and live your own life, use your free will. Um, yeah. It's, it's just the whole, the whole mission of it is to just remind people that we can help ourselves come back to our joy by, in spreading joy in other people and just, mm. Random things that you never know, [00:40:00] the ripple effect that you can have in the world around you.

Like maybe you just even like create, I don't know, like write down on a sidewalk with some chalk one day or message that like sits with somebody that plants a seed, that uplift them in a way that. You have no idea. You don't even know this person exists or will ever exist. Um, and it could have totally, you know, just shifted the way that they walk in that day or that week or that year.

And you, it's, it's been really sweet to remember that and hear like sometimes five, six months later from people, oh my God, that was you.

There's something good. So cool. Thank you so much for coming and chatting with me today, Amy. Love chatting with you. So much fun. It's been such a delight. Thanks so much for having me here, Sam.