81: The Freedom Audit: Are you Building a Life or a Prison?

In this episode we discuss how to identify if you are creating success at the expense of your well being, and the audit formula you can use to break the cycle.

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SPEAKER_00 0:14

Hey everyone, welcome to this week's episode of the Create Your Day podcast. I'm your host, Jen Cody, and I am so happy to be here with you guys and talking about some pretty amazing stuff this week. It's been a while. I have not recorded a podcast in two weeks, which is not like me. Um, and I think I actually, now that I think of it, I think I said that last time I was on here. So apparently I do do that more often than I thought. Um, but anyway, I have been not on here for good reason. So I've been traveling a lot, teaching a lot, doing a lot of all the things that I love to do, working with my clients, building businesses, and helping people just to feel better about their life while they build their business. That's really one of the hardest things that we can do is try to sustainably build our business while we also do not, you know, sacrifice ourselves. Um, so I've been lucky enough over the past few weeks to do some traveling and some teaching. And um, I'm actually going to be traveling again coming up this week and speaking to a lot of business owners and talking about like what the biggest challenges are and what um to do about those biggest challenges. And we all know like the basic things that people are trying to do, right? If you're building a business, you want to increase your revenue, you want to have more clients, you want, you know, all the things you want to build whatever it is, whether it's you know a brick and mortar business, um, a service-based business. Um, I work with a lot of different types of clients, actually. So I have clients that are in the restaurant business, in the real estate business, um, in the hair business. There's so many, the beauty business, I should say. So there's so many different types of businesses out there, and some of them perform a service and some of them have actual physical products. But the essence of being a business owner doesn't necessarily change. And what I mean by that is at the end of the day, we're still looking at the same processes and systems and trying to be a whole person while we navigate this landscape. And that's not always easy. And what I want to talk to you guys about today is how to make sure that as you build your business, you're not building, you're not trapping yourself into some in a model that is not sustainable. And what sparked this was actually a conversation that I had in the past few weeks. Um, first, it was during one of the classes that I was teaching, and I was speaking to a group of business owners in the beauty business, and we were talking about, I was talking about how being an entrepreneur is something that a lot of people do. We make this choice because we think of freedom, right? We think we are going to work for ourselves. We're not going to work for anyone else because that is going to give us freedom. And that's not a false statement. There is a lot of freedom in entrepreneurship if it is done the right way. But what happens is we have this mindset that that's what we're going to set out to do is be entrepreneurs, not have to answer to anyone, and have all this freedom. And instead, what happens is we wind up answering to everyone and having no freedom at all because we are working 24 hours a day, seven days a week. There's no boundaries, and we're missing out on a lot of key points in our life, key points with people that we love. And we don't want to do that, right? Like that's not why we got into this game. We got into this, I did at least. I got into this game because I just have a mind that is constantly moving, and I'm super creative when it comes to ideas. And I probably have a different idea every single day that I want to bring to life. And for most of them, I do try to do that. And that's a lot of energy. And that's why I decided to do what I'm doing. And I was talking with a client of mine who also is launching a new business, and it's a service-based business. So she has been really spinning her wheels, trying to um what's the word I'm looking for? Compartmentalize, let's say, put her systems in place, figure out like the the customer journey, all of those things, like really trying hard to package what it is that she is offering. And I was having a conversation with her, and things have been going really well, right? Like she's making money and her business is growing, and she's at that really crucial point where if you're not careful, your business is going to run you, and you are not going to be running your business. And I realized that she was heading towards this point, and we had a conversation, and she actually said the words to me that she feels like she's building herself a prison. And all the bells in my brain went off, and I was like, oh my goodness, this is exactly what I try to help people avoid because it's so easy that we build what we think is what looks like success or what success looks like, and what we're actually building is a prison for ourselves. And how many of you out there feel that? I really I know from the conversations that I have with you guys that this is not an uncommon thing. And I've totally been there myself. I can remember nights just lying awake at night crying because I was so exhausted, but I couldn't sleep because my brain was going 400 miles an hour. Um, my business was doing well, but you know, I missed my family, I missed my kids, I was constantly on phone calls and in meetings, and you know, it's it's not easy to take yourself out of that because as an entrepreneur, we're not relying on anyone else for our success, right? We're relying on ourselves. And that can be a scary moment to realize that wait a second, in order for me to move through this moment, in order for me to break free of my business being a prison, I have to let go of things. I have to give up some control and I have to pull back. And pulling back when you are your own boss, when you are your the the provider, right? If you're the person who's determining your income, pulling back on that, take taking your foot off that gas can be very terrifying because the only way that sometimes we think we have control over our business is to keep our foot all the way down on the gas, but that is not sustainable. So, what I want to talk to you guys about today are the signs that maybe this is what's happening in your business. If any of this is starting to feel like, oh my goodness, yes, I totally feel that way, listen to what we're gonna chat about today because what difference does it make if you're making $30,000 a month but you haven't seen your kids in weeks, right? Does that, does that mesh? Does that make sense? You don't want your business to look great on Instagram, but not be able to go to, you know, your daughter's dance recital or your son's hockey game. We need for these things to um be symbiotic, right? We need them to exist at the same time and not be mutually exclusive. And that I think is what happens. Wait, I need to plug in my computer here before it dies. So that is what happens a lot of the time, is that we wind up in this situation where um we're letting go of what's really important in our life because we're putting all of our energy into the business. So there are ways around this, right? You can restructure your calendar, you can block out time to make sure that you see your family for dinner, um, and you can do all of that while still working on your business. So here's my first reality check question for you. When was the last time that you felt genuinely peaceful? And when I say peaceful, I don't mean at peace with your day. Like, I don't mean when you collapse into bed and feel, oh, I finally got everything done and I can go to sleep. That's one kind of peace, but that comes from exhaustion. I want to know when was the last time you truly felt that you were at peace? Because the harsh truth is if your success is costing you your peace, it is too expensive. Right? We do not want to live that way. We need our peace and our success to exist at the same time. So now I want to talk to you about someone else. Another one of my uh family members actually was talking to me about making some changes in his life. And one of the things that he wanted to do was start getting up at 5 a.m. And it was because, you know, he read the book, The 5 a.m. Club, and was trying to create change in his life that was lacking, that was missing. So he thought he had it all figured out because his perfect morning routine was now up at 5 a.m., taking a cold shower, working out for an hour, doing some meditation, journaling, all of the things that are supposed to happen when you wake up super early, except that he was exhausted by nine o'clock in the morning and did not have any energy left to give to what he needed to do. And I find this a lot with people that I work with. We have this list of things that we think we're supposed to do. And yes, it definitely comes from social media, it comes from the books that we're told to read. We see, okay, how about this actually? How many of you have scrolled Instagram and you come across someone that you feel connected to? So it doesn't necessarily have to be a business person. It could be maybe there's a lifestyle account that you like, um, but there's someone, right, that you kind of aspire to be a little more like. You you just really love the content that they put out. It feels aligned with what you want your life to look like. Now, if that person starts talking about, oh, I get up every day at four o'clock in the morning, I, you know, journal for an hour, or I go to the gym every night at 8 p.m., whatever it is that they talk about, we tend to latch on to that as the reason that their life or business looks the way that it does. And we don't allow ourselves to understand that what they have is attainable to us. And it does not mean we have to follow the same exact path. We're allowed to navigate our life in a way that works for us. We want to build our own routines around our natural energy. What are the energy patterns that you have that feel good to you? If you're a night owl, then why are you trying to get up at four o'clock in the morning? Like you're setting yourself up for um defeat. You're setting yourself up to feel defeated, which is never a place that we want to be coming from. So I want to do something really practical with you guys this week. And I'm gonna share with you something that I call the freedom audit. So I want you to grab a pen and you're going, and one, if you're driving, don't grab a pen, but you can just listen. But I want you to um go through this process when you're able to. And there's going to be a few steps to this. So the first thing you're going to do is track your energy levels hourly for one day. Okay? So just pay attention to how do you feel at 8 a.m.? How do you feel at 12 p.m.? How do you feel at 4 p.m.? Just go through your day and you could do it on one day. It doesn't have to be over the course of a week or anything, but over the course of one day and maybe pick a day that looks like your regular day, right? Like this past weekend, my daughter ran in the New York City Marathon. I wouldn't have picked that day to do this for myself because I was running around like a lunatic all day. So pick a day that looks like your usual day and track your energy levels. And then I want you to pay attention to what is going on during those hours. Like where you see big fluctuations, if you're super energized at certain times or super, super tired and unmotivated at different times, what's happening during those times? What's contributing to those energy levels? And then I want you to look at three tasks that you're doing. This is this is more for my business owners. So look at three tasks that you're doing for your business each day. This could be answering emails, having sales calls, um creating your social media content, researching content for a webinar, whatever it is that you're doing, um, putting together your new pricing structure. Whatever it is that you do for your business, working on your cash flow, think about it right now. And what are three tasks that you could either eliminate, automate, or delegate? Eliminate, automate, or delegate. You don't have to come up with the process and the answer right now about who's gonna who are de who are you delegating it to, how are you automating it, just what are those tasks. Identify them. And then pretend that that day doesn't even exist and map out what your ideal work schedule would look like based on your natural rhythms and I want you to be super honest here. There's someone that I worked with a few years ago. Um he was helping me with some of my website creation, and his natural rhythm was he started working at like one o'clock in the afternoon, and he would work until two, three o'clock in the morning. I'm not gonna tell him he can't do that. That is how he steps into his creative genius. That's how he does his best work. So I want you to do the same thing. Be really honest about what is your ideal work schedule based on your natural rhythms. And I'm gonna tell you, when I first did this for myself, I realized that I was trying to do a lot of things backwards because I was trying to fit in those times that I felt didn't belong to me. Right. So I was trying to do things that I was being really creative and I was trying to do things during times that I felt really creative that were not really creative projects, right? Does that make sense? And then when I'm exhausted and drained, I'm trying to like create content for social media. That doesn't make any sense. Instead, you want to be able to schedule um the things when they work best for you. So, what does that look like for you? How would it change for you to really change your schedule? So one of the things that I did over the past few months when I realized that I was on this kind of hamster wheel, this um spinning my wheels constantly and building my own kind of business prison, I took a little break. And I just took some time. I did not post on social media, I did not send any emails, I did not record any podcasts, and I did not have any calls with clients. And it was a little bit scary because my business to me runs as fast as I run. Right? So, what happens if I stop? I'm afraid my business is gonna stop. But instead, the opposite happened. My clients really respected the fact that I did that when I returned and I paid attention to building more content and writing my emails and recording my podcasts. It was better because I felt better. I needed to take that little reset. So I know not all of us are in a situation where we can just be like, you know what, for this week, I'm not gonna do anything when it comes to my business. That's not really feasible for a lot of us, especially if we work for other people. Um, but I want you to do something this week and just try it and see if it changes your mindset a little bit about your own prison that you're building around yourself. The first thing I want you to do is schedule some joy breaks. Right? What are some things that bring you joy? Is it listening to your favorite song, having your favorite snack, having a cup of tea, making a phone call to a family member or a friend? Maybe it's scrolling Instagram if you don't get to do that during the day, but schedule a joy break a few times a day, just for a few minutes. It doesn't have to be a 20-minute break or anything, but just something to insert some joy between the things that you have to do. And then pay attention to your wins. And this is going to be different for each one of you. What are the wins that you can identify during your day? Is it a win that you got up and went for a run this morning? Is it a win that you got some positive feedback from a client? Pay attention to the wins. Those are really, really important for us to give as much weight to as we do to the things that drag us down. And then go back to that audit, the freedom audit that you did, look at your energy levels and see if you can plan your week around your energy and not just around what has to be done. Be intentional. When you look at your to-do list for the week, look and see when's the best time for me to do this. You know, I don't know who is listening right now that has taken my time management course, but in the time management course, I talk about plotting out your week. But this is an important step in that. If you're plotting out your week, and one of the things that you have to do is um, I don't know, I'm gonna shop for new school uniforms for your kids. When is the best time for you to do that? Don't just look at, oh, I have a window Tuesday at noon, I'm gonna do that. If that's sandwiched between two really stressful events, right? Maybe look and see, maybe there's an evening that you can go and take your kids with you, um, you know, and it's going to match your energy level a little bit more. So this is going to be really individual, but see what it looks like to plan your week around your energy and not just your tasks. And then the same way we said with the joy breaks, like introducing some joy, find something creative, just one thing per week, something creative that sounds fun to you and implement it. Just one thing each week that gets your creative juices going. So I want you to do this because when you create a prison that's based on constant achievement in any area, it's important to work on redefining what those achievements look like. And in injecting joy and creativity into your week is going to really, really help help you with that. And I want to end today by giving you a little permission. You are allowed to build your business in a way that feels good to you. You are allowed to define success on your own terms. If someone on social media is telling you that your success should look like working two days a week and making seven figures, and you can't seem to see how they're doing that. I'm gonna tell you right now it's because they're not doing that, but that's okay. Um, you are allowed to define success on your terms. Maybe your success means that you make enough money to pay your bills, sleep well at night, and attend your son's basketball games. That's fine. Success does not have to mean that you're driving around in a flashy car, that you know, you have millions of dollars in the bank and you're going on flashy trips. That's not what success has to look like. So really think about what your definition of success is because you are allowed to prioritize your peace, your joy, and your time. And I encourage you, when you are prioritizing, that it should go in that order. Your peace, your joy, and your time, when those are prioritized, that automatically equals success. Because at the end of the day, our success really is measured in how peaceful we are. A successful business that costs you your life and your peace is not successful, right? So I would love to hear your thoughts on this. I would love to hear how you do if you decide to go implement these things into your week this week. I always want to hear your feedback. And of course, I'm always going to encourage you to stop and rate the podcast, leave a review for the podcast. I cannot stress enough how important that is for us to reach more people. So every rating, every review, it all helps us reach more of an audience. And if you take the time to do that, please screenshot it, send it to me, and I will send you a free gift. Okay, thank you so much for joining me this week. I hope you're able to take this information and go out there and create the day, create your day in the best way possible. I am rooting for you, I am rooting for your success, and I am rooting for your success in a way that does not sacrifice your well-being and your peace. Have a great week, everybody. Remember to take care of yourself, take care of each other, and I will see you here next week. Have a great one.