Thoroughly ADHD
I'm Alex Delmar, a certified ADHD coach and person with ADHD. I'm here to share what I've learned so other people with ADHD can enjoy better lives!
Thoroughly ADHD
Breaking Free: ADHD and Limiting Beliefs
Limiting beliefs about ourselves stem from early experiences of criticism and misunderstanding of ADHD symptoms, but these harmful narratives can be rewritten with awareness, self-compassion, and consistent practice. The journey begins by identifying negative thought patterns and challenging their validity with evidence from past experiences that contradict these beliefs.
• Building self-acceptance by reframing ADHD as a difference, not a deficit
• Shifting perspective to see traits as strengths - distraction as curiosity, impulsivity as creativity
• Cultivating self-compassion through kinder self-talk and challenging negative thoughts
• Creating empowering beliefs by identifying personal strengths and celebrating small achievements
• Maintaining the four cornerstones of ADHD treatment: quality sleep, healthy eating, regular exercise, and mindfulness
• Building a support system of understanding people who offer genuine praise and constructive feedback
• Working with specialists who understand ADHD and can provide objective perspectives
Your ADHD brain is a source of incredible strengths. It's time to stop letting old stories define you and start believing you are capable, creative, and uniquely brilliant.
Do you ever feel like an invisible force is holding you back, whispering "you can't or you're not good enough? Limiting beliefs are deeply rooted convictions that dictate what we believe we can or cannot do. For those of us with ADHD, these beliefs often stem from early experiences involving a whole lot of criticism and a misunderstanding of ADHD symptoms, For instance, attributing problems with executive function to laziness. Today, I'll talk about overcoming these beliefs that stand in our way. I'm Alex Delmar, a certified ADHD coach and person with ADHD. Welcome to Thoroughly ADHD, where I share what I've learned to help other people with ADHD enjoy better lives.
Alex Delmar:You might be able to relate to my surprise and confusion and even anger when I learned in middle age that my shortcomings weren't due to character flaws but to symptoms of undiagnosed ADHD. But the thousands of times that I'd been asked, "what is wrong with you, you lazy, messy, annoying, klutzy, loud, weirdo, crybaby, space cadet had already damaged my self-concept and my self-esteem, because a lifetime of external judgment, being told over and over that you're not enough of this and too much of that, can become internalized as personal failing, create a deep misunderstanding of oneself and erode self-trust. But you can rewrite the narrative. It starts with building awareness. So pay attention to recurring negative thoughts, mean things you say to yourself or red flag statements like that's just the way I am. Journaling can be a powerful tool to identify these patterns, but with ADHD, it's possible that your limiting beliefs are hanging out front and center all day long.
Alex Delmar:Once you've identified these beliefs, you can challenge their validity and reframe them. List evidence why this belief isn't true or might not be true. Look for past experiences that contradict it To foster self-acceptance. Reframe ADHD as a trait, not a flaw. Understand that your brain is wired differently, not deficient.
Alex Delmar:Shift perspective from deficit to strength. What might seem like distraction can be reframed as curiosity or impulsivity can be creativity or spontaneity. Cultivate self-compassion. Treat yourself with kindness, understanding and patience. Acknowledge that struggling with ADHD does not make you less valuable. Monitor your self-talk, catching negative thoughts immediately and challenging them with a more balanced perspective. Then create new, empowering beliefs that you can genuinely get behind.
Alex Delmar:Focus on your strengths. Actively identify and leverage what you're good at. Ask trusted friends or colleagues what they see as your strengths. Engage in activities you genuinely enjoy and excel at. Celebrate small achievements and keep a daily done list. Even accomplishments like making a meal or showering count. This practice helps reinforce belief in your ability to achieve things. Develop a growth mindset where you view challenges as learning opportunities instead of another chance to fail.
Alex Delmar:To reduce behaviors that reinforce negative beliefs about yourself. Utilize ADHD-specific tools for time management, organization, productivity, etc. In order to build up your skills around any deficits and to increase the number of positive experiences you have in areas you've been struggling. Also, to support brain health and emotional regulation, it's vital to maintain the four cornerstones of ADHD treatment. These are consistent, quality sleep, healthy eating, regular exercise and mindfulness. In regard to limiting beliefs, the non-judgmental observation of mindfulness helps us step back from impulsive reactions and self-blame, creating space for more intentional responses instead of automatic negative thoughts. Finally, build a strong support system by connecting with people who understand ADHD and offer genuine praise and constructive feedback.
Alex Delmar:Consider working with a therapist or coach specializing in ADHD for an objective perspective and tailored strategies. Remember, overcoming deeply ingrained beliefs is a process, not a quick fix. It requires consistency and patience, and it is a journey of gradual change and growth. Your path will involve unique challenges and goals, but your ADHD brain is a source of incredible strengths. It's time to stop letting old stories define you and start believing you are capable, creative and uniquely brilliant. This has been Thoroughly ADHD. I'm Alex Delmar and I know your time is valuable, so I hope you found something useful here and that you'll like follow or subscribe and come back next Tuesday. Thank you.