Thoroughly ADHD

ADHD-Smart Strategies For Food, Drink, And Fun

• Alex Delmar Coaching

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Here are some ADHD-smart strategies to enjoy parties without the food and drink hangover. Simple guidelines, seating choices, and exit cues help you feel good during the event and the next day.

• why parties and holidays increase impulsive eating and drinking 
• how poor interoception and dopamine drive overindulgence 
• pre-event routines that lower risk 
• buffet scanning and one-plate strategy 
• seating away from food and staying engaged 
• no-seconds rule for buffets and dinners 
• starting with a non-alcoholic drink 
• mood check-ins to prevent emotional eating and drinking
• setting time or cue-based exits 
• planning with compassion for future you

If you have any questions about this topic or you want to develop an individualized plan for yourself, I'm here for you

Alex Delmar:

The sheer volume of things to consume on offer at parties, combined with inattention, impulsivity, and social awkwardness, can create an environment where it is way too easy for people with ADHD to overeat and to drink too much. The time around major holidays can be especially problematic because the additional responsibilities and distractions impact our ability to maintain healthy habits, and this in turn impacts our ability to make good decisions and around it goes.

Alex Delmar:

The good news is that, like with most things ADHD, I can offer you some general suggestions and a few specific actions you can take to enjoy yourself and avoid the physical and emotional aftermath associated with going overboard with food and drink. I'm Alex Delmar, a certified ADHD coach and person with ADHD. Welcome to Thoroughly ADHD, where I share what I've learned to help other people with ADHD enjoy better lives.

Alex Delmar:

The most likely scenario to negatively impact your ability to make good decisions right off the bat, is to arrive to an event exhausted, starving, and panicked. You may know from previous episodes of Thoroughly ADHD that you can minimize your risk of this particular nightmare both by maintaining ADHD management self-care routines, and by preparing at least a day ahead everything that you need to arrive feeling well rested, calm, and confident that you are going to have fun.

Alex Delmar:

Unfortunately, even if you've prepared really well ahead of time, if you're anything like me, at some point during the party, you might feel awkward, bored, anxious, distracted, or buzzed, and any of these conditions puts you in imminent danger of overindulging. Keep in mind that people with ADHD have poor interoception. This means our brains don't do a great job of interpreting signals from our body. We can accidentally eat tasty treats until our belly aches because each bite gives us a little hit of dopamine and we didn't receive the "I'm full" signal. So before you go to the party, decide on guidelines for what and how much you're going to eat and drink. Be realistic and remember your goal is to feel good when the party ends, not deprived or ashamed.

Alex Delmar:

Use these standards to influence your choices throughout the event. Periodically check your mood to make sure you aren't at risk of drowning your feelings, and look at what is in front of you. I was once so engrossed in a conversation, I found myself halfway through a piece of cake that I didn't even realize had been handed to me.

Alex Delmar:

Parties with a self-service buffet are the greatest risk for people with ADHD because of the opportunity for endless grazing and non-existent portion control, and it's a good place to hang out when you're not sure who to talk to. One strategy to avoid thoughtlessly eating your way through a buffet is to first go around to check out all your options and select the best ones. Then fill a plate starting with the healthier options and ending with the least healthy. Theoretically, your plate is mostly full by the time you get to the most fattening options, thereby limiting how much you can take of them.

Alex Delmar:

This is a good strategy even if you aren't counting calories, because the least healthy foods also tend to be the ones that make you feel like garbage later. For example, if you're looking at hors d'oeuvres, you might go heavy on shrimp cocktail and veggies with dips like guacamole or hummus, but take only a couple of cheesy pigs in a blanket.

Alex Delmar:

As soon as you have filled your plate, look for a seat far away from the food. If you started a conversation with someone at the serving table and you want to continue it, say something like, "That's really interesting. Let's sit over there so you can tell me more about it." If that seat has a serving platter close at hand, just move it out of reach.

Alex Delmar:

In any case, do not sit in that lone chair in the corner. Pick a seat that makes it easy for people to talk to you. Try to stay engaged with the other guests, and once you have finished eating, take advantage of any opportunity to participate in activities that will keep your hands busy and your mind focused. Help in the kitchen, play games, dance, sing karaoke, or decorate a page for the scrapbook. You'll be less likely to feel anxious or bored, and you'll be distracted from the call of the dessert table.

Alex Delmar:

Don't go back for a second serving of anything unless it's the best thing you've ever had in your entire life and you won't be able to stop thinking about it. The no seconds rule applies to sit-down dinners as well. Fill your plate one time, heavy on the healthiest items, and pass on any serving platters that try to land next to you.

Alex Delmar:

Aside from reducing proximity, the easiest way to avoid overindulging in food is to also avoid overindulging in alcohol. And the easiest way to do that is to not have any alcohol at all. A stiff drink may seem especially attractive when you are uncomfortable, so always make your first drink non-alcoholic while you settle in. If you're afraid it will draw negative attention in this crowd, you can put your non-alcoholic drink in a fancy glass with a citrus wedge. My mom carried apple juice and club soda in a champagne glass, and no one noticed in 30 years.

Alex Delmar:

While choosing your beverage, consider that alcohol impairs your ability to manage your ADHD symptoms, and that first drink can make you forget all about the intentions you set for this event. That discomfort you feel will pass in a moment, probably without anyone else even realizing it happened, but people will notice if you become dysregulated because you're under the influence.

Alex Delmar:

The last strategy to help avoid overdoing it is to limit the amount of time you spend at the party. Depending on the situation, you can set a specific time you will leave or watch for a cue such as dessert being served. Failing that, if your periodic mood check-in returns the information that you are tired, it is time to leave. The more tired you are, the more you will crave sugar and simple carbs, the more appealing a drink will sound, and the fewer resources you'll have available to self-regulate.

Alex Delmar:

Implementing a good plan will take you far, but when in doubt, you can consider the effect this might have on future you later tonight, or tomorrow morning, or the next time you have to see these people.

Alex Delmar:

If you have any questions about this topic or you want to develop an individualized plan for yourself, I'm here for you. I hope you found this information useful. If so, come back next week for a new episode of Thoroughly ADHD. Thank you.