39. Invitation to Chuseok celebrations

I'm celebrating Chuseok — one of Korea's biggest holidays — and I'm inviting you to join me, because the thousand-year-old wisdom at the heart of this tradition has never been more urgent.

In a world that tells us that "self-made" is a real thing, that we're separate from nature, and that texts and FaceTime are enough, Chuseok whispers a different truth. And it might be exactly what you need.

Listen to hear more about:

• Why your ancestors matter — and they might not be who you think
• The harvests you've been overlooking (and why recognizing them plants seeds for what's next)
• Why showing up in person matters in a way that FaceTime can never replace
• How to practice gratitude in a way that doesn't feel performative (and why that matters)

So many of us are starving for belonging and true togetherness. This episode offers a way to start building it today.

Transcript

Hey friends, you're listening to Liberatory Business and I'm your host, Simone Seol. Thank you so much for listening. The day this episode comes out—if you're listening on the day of or the week of—I want to tell you that it's happening at a very special time in Korea: the Chuseok holiday. It's one of the two most important holidays of the year. It's a really big deal, and I'm going to be spending time with my family to celebrate this tradition.

As I do that, I also wanted to extend an invitation to you—an invitation to share in our cultural practice in your own way.

What is Chuseok?

The easiest way I describe it is like Korean Thanksgiving, even though it's not quite the same thing. The roots of this holiday stretch back over a thousand years, and it falls on the 15th day of the eighth lunar month. This year it's October 6th.

Every year on this day, millions of people travel across the country. Highways are packed, trains are full, and everyone is heading home—not the home where they currently live, but their ancestral hometown where extended family is. Everybody's coming together. It's often three generations or more coming together under one roof.

People don't just travel for a meal, even though food is really important. They're coming to perform what we call charye, which is a ritual that venerates and honors our ancestors. We prepare big tables with lots of food that's beautifully arranged. We make rice cakes—the Korean version that we specifically make for Chuseok is called songpyeon. These are crescent-shaped rice cakes filled with sweet, delicious things like sweet sesame, red bean paste, or chestnut paste. And we bow. We bow to our ancestors to remember, to honor, to say thank you.

You might recognize that this tradition is not unique to Korea. The Chinese and many other cultures that have been influenced by Chinese culture have the Mid-Autumn Festival. And to my knowledge, many traditions across the world have something similar.

So what about Chuseok do I want to let you know about, regardless of where you come from, in terms of how you can partake?

Ancestors

The first thing I want to start with is ancestors. Now, if you're like many people raised in Western cultures, ancestor veneration might feel foreign, maybe even uncomfortable.

But I think there's something really important about remembrance. We're acknowledging a truth: none of us here is self-made. Every single one of us stands on the shoulders of countless people who came before us. Their choices, their sacrifices, their work, their love, their stories, their songs—they flow through us whether we are aware of it or not.

If you think about your own lineage, you could probably think of someone in your lineage who survived a famine so that you could be here. Someone who persevered through war. Someone who made the heartbreaking decision to leave everything behind and immigrate to a new land to give themselves and their descendants a better opportunity. Someone who worked backbreaking jobs so their children could go to school.

I want to take a moment here to acknowledge that connecting to your biological ancestors might not be possible or desirable for everyone, right? Maybe you are not connected to your biological family because they weren't loving. Maybe they caused harm to you. Maybe you're estranged, or maybe they're no longer around, or maybe you never knew them. Maybe you're adopted and don't know your biological lineage. Or maybe you're part of a diaspora and you feel somewhat disconnected from your roots.

And if that's you, I really want you to hear that the practice of honoring ancestors isn't just about blood relationships, and it does not require you to pretend that painful or harmful relationships were good or to force gratitude where there's nothing to be grateful for.

The thing is that ancestors aren't only biological. There are many different types of ties, and blood ties are just one kind. We have chosen ancestors. There are what you can think of as intellectual ancestors—the teachers who shaped us, the mentors who believed in us and loved us and altered us. There are spiritual ancestors whose wisdom guides us to this day, whose words reach across time and place to touch our lives. And there are also cultural ancestors—artists, writers, poets, activists, visionaries who made the world that we inherited. There are neighbors who showed us kindness when our own blood families couldn't.

Maybe you honor the teacher who saw potential in you, even when your own parents didn't. Maybe you honor your friend's mom from your childhood who always welcomed you to their table. Those of you building chosen families—I want to tell you that your chosen family absolutely counts.

So Chuseok invites us to pause and ask: Who are all of my ancestors, whether they're biological or chosen or intellectual or artistic or spiritual or cultural? What did they give to me? And how do I carry that gift forward? And whose ancestor am I going to be, even if I'm not going to have biological children? Because like I said, there are so many different kinds of human bonds, and blood bonds are only one kind—and sometimes not the most important kind at all.

What kind of legacy of love, resilience, creativity, courage, joy, compassion, generosity am I creating for those who come after me?

I think this practice is really powerful. It roots us when life feels uncertain, when we question our purpose, when we're trying to figure out what's next. Remembering our lineage—in all the different forms that lineage can take—can really anchor us.

Harvest

The second thing about Chuseok is harvest. Chuseok happens in the autumn during the full moon, when harvest is complete in traditional cycles—at least in theory, right? It's a moment to pause after months of hard work and to thank the earth for its generosity.

So many of us are disconnected from natural rhythms, right? We can buy strawberries in December. We can buy tomatoes in February. And we've gained a lot from that, for sure. We've gained convenience. We've gained the ability to sustain ourselves and not have to be completely dependent on natural cycles. But I think we also lose something when we don't tend to this connection to nature. And that is the awareness that we are not existing separately from nature, floating on top of it. We are part of it. We are nature. We are human animals that are part of the ecology of the earth.

So I want to ask you: What has the earth given you this year? And we can start with literal crops in agriculture, because that's certainly part of what the earth has given us. Otherwise, none of us would be alive today. But it's not always literally crops that come from the earth. Maybe it's the creative project that you finally completed. Maybe it's the relationship you nurtured, the healing you experienced, the lessons you learned through struggle.

Taking time to recognize and to give thanks for these harvests too—they're not literal harvest, but they are spiritual harvest. And I think when we do this, it leads us to plant seeds, whether they're literal seeds or metaphorical spiritual seeds, for future harvests.

Gathering

What I'm about to talk about next might be one of the most poignant countercultural aspects in the moment of time that we're living through. Remember I told you that Chuseok is always a big family gathering. People travel for hours, sometimes an entire day, to be with each other in person. And no matter how inconvenient it is, no matter how far it is—not everyone, because not everyone can—but most people will try really hard to travel to be with their people.

Once again, I want to acknowledge something important, which is that this is not necessarily your biological family. Your biological family might not be safe or healthy for you to gather with. Maybe it's not even possible because maybe they're not even around. Maybe they live too far away and you just simply can't travel given your circumstances.

I want to reiterate: it's not just about biological family specifically. The wisdom of Chuseok is fundamentally about the human need for belonging, for community, for people who know you and show up for you and the people that you know and that you will show up for. Maybe it's, again, your chosen family—people who've become your siblings, who celebrate your wins and hold you through losses even when it's inconvenient. Maybe it's your queer chosen family. Maybe it's your recovery community, your creative collaborators, your neighbors who have been there for you as if they're family.

I have conversations about this a lot with people nowadays. A lot of people do feel isolated. They don't have a built-in community where they can just show up or invite people to. And if that sounds like you, I want to invite you on the occasion of Chuseok to start building it, to start seeding it. Reach out to somebody. Invite someone to coffee. When someone does invite you, say yes. When there's an opportunity to show up more consistently—not just when it's easy or convenient for you—take that opportunity. Acquaintances can become friends when those relationships are nurtured, and friends can become like family when those relationships are nurtured.

It's become especially clear to me over the past few years—after the pandemic—you can chat with anyone, message anyone, FaceTime anyone at any time. But it's not the same. There's something about being in the same physical space, being in the presence of another body, breaking bread together, having a cup of tea together, sharing stories, taking a walk together, doing chores together—these create bonds that digital connection simply can't replace. They can't replicate it. Relationships really do require intentional time and presence.

Not just quality time, but quantity time. It doesn't need to be like a cuddle party every time. In my life's memory, I can remember many Chuseok occasions where there was tension amongst family members or there were fights. But these are part of human relationships, right? There are boring moments, annoying moments, mundane moments, moments when it doesn't feel like you're doing anything—nothing special is happening. But the point is, the important thing is that you are spending time together, and that matters.

I want to suggest that you especially look at people who aren't of the same generation as you. I think it's so easy for us to become really age-segregated in our lives, right? Kids hang out with other kids, young adults are with other young adults, and the elders are often isolated and they are only with other elders. But all the different generations need each other, right? And this is a lifetime practice, so it's not like you've got to figure this all out tomorrow. But what would it look like for you to take the next small step towards reclaiming these ties in your life? To create more intentional gatherings, to show up for other people in more intentional and committed ways, to create our own rituals.

Gratitude and Connection

All of that I just talked about—ancestors, harvest, being with people—I think it all comes down to connection and the gratitude that comes from recognizing connection.

When we practice gratitude for the ways in which we are all interconnected, we acknowledge that we are receivers, that life is a gift that we didn't earn. That we are supported by forces seen and unseen. We're supported by the sun that rises every day, the rain that falls, the people who love us and the people who don't even know us, much less love us, but still do work that sustains our lives. Our ancestors who paved the way.

We're taught to believe that we can create everything through our individual effort, individual perfection, individual heroism. But that's an illusion. If you strip away the gifts and contributions of others—the infrastructure, teachers, the inherited knowledge, the love, nature's bounty—none of us would have anything. And this is what liberates us.

Making It Your Own

I've already offered some ideas for how to make the festivities of Chuseok your own, how to celebrate Chuseok in your own way. And I really think that wisdom traditions aren't supposed to be fixed in time. They're not supposed to be preserved in a museum. They're meant to be lived. They're meant to be adapted. They're meant to be reimagined for our own context, for our own communities.

I'm not suggesting that anyone appropriate Korean culture. I'm inviting you to be inspired to create or reclaim your own practices of connection. And as a Korean person, I am telling you that I would be happy if someone who was not Korean in any way told me, "Hey, I honor the importance of Chuseok in your culture, and this is what I'm doing to honor the wisdom of Chuseok in my own life." I'd be like, "Yes! That's so fun. It's so cool." I would love that.

So I want to give you some practical ideas that you are welcome to be inspired by or to take into your life.

Create an Intentional Practice of Honoring

Remember, we talked about remembering those who make and made your life possible, whether they're biological or chosen or spiritual. Maybe you're going to spend some time to research your family history and share those stories. Maybe you can create an altar with photos of loved ones, mentors, historical figures, or chosen family members who've shaped you. I've also known people to put photos of their pets that have passed away. Pets become ancestors too, right? Maybe you can write letters to people who aren't around to read them anymore, but just offer up the letter to them in the spirit realm, thanking them for what they gave you. Or maybe you'll become an ancestor that you wish you had, breaking cycles to consciously build a different legacy than some parts of the legacy that you've been handed.

Reconnect with the Earth's Rhythms

Just start by noticing what season you're in. Whatever season you're in, think about growing something, even if it's just a little basil plant on your windowsill. If you are not doing that already, stop at a farmer's market and ask what's in season. Or just go outside—you don't need to be anywhere special. Just notice the light. Notice the trees, notice the sky. Notice what the air smells like, and let yourself just have a moment to feel like you're part of something vast and cyclical and generous.

Create Your Own Gathering Rituals

If you don't already have one that's easy to access, think about: Who are my people? Once again, even if they're not biologically related to you, who are my chosen people and when are we going to come together? See if you can make it a regular commitment. Maybe you tell your friends in your neighborhood, in your community, "Okay, we're going to gather together this first Sunday of every month." Or maybe with these people, "We're going to go on an annual summer camping trip, and it's non-negotiable."

It doesn't need to be a hundred people. Even a community of two is a community. Whenever there's more than one body, it's a community. So don't be shy to start small. Know that it still matters. And give yourself the permission to take the initiative to be the one that does the inviting, that creates and holds a space, that sets the table. Show up consistently. Bring people together and let it be imperfect. Let it be a little messy.

The belonging that we're all craving doesn't happen because you snap a finger. It's not like Amazon next-day delivery, right? You don't just get to order it and have it on demand. It's something that we need to show up for again and again. Even if there's tension and conflict sometimes—I'm not saying you have to keep hanging out with people who are terrible and harm you, and you don't like them anymore, or your values don't align anymore. But to the people that do matter, that in your heart you know that you want to be in community with them, it's about making a commitment to make that connection more important than just sheer convenience.

Practice Gratitude

Lastly, remember what I said about gratitude. I think it's really powerful to create an intentional container for gratitude as well. Maybe it's like a three-minute-a-day practice where you take time to write down what you are grateful for. 

And you know, one of the things that I hate the most is forced gratitude—like forcing yourself to be grateful for things when you're just mad at the world. That doesn't work at all, at least for me.

But I think when you start looking outside of yourself and your life, just notice the web of interconnection that you're a part of, both human and bigger than human—the natural world, the spiritual world. I think when you take the time to acknowledge that interconnection, something like gratitude emerges naturally without you having to force it when you are just not feeling it.

One thing that I do want to suggest is to make it tangible. Don't just think it. Writing it down is a way of making it tangible. Make a jar where every time you notice something that you're grateful for, you put a note in it and you fill the jar throughout the year. Maybe you send a message to somebody, send a letter. I think making it tangible is really what's important here. I think that is where the magic is, as opposed to just thinking it and just letting it go.

You do get to decide. You get to create practices that are meaningful for you that honor where you come from or create new traditions that work for your life and community. And that invitation is truly open to everyone who's listening to this.

I am mentally, spiritually sending everyone who's listening a basket of songpyeon—rice cakes filled with sweet things. And I was just talking to a friend of mine who's like, "Oh, the texture of rice cakes, I just can't do it." I totally get it. If that's not a texture you're used to, you might not like it. In that case, I'm sending you a plate full of fried things. We fry a lot of things at Chuseok. We fry vegetables, we fry meat, we fry fish. That's another symbol of thanking nature for its bounty. So I am spiritually sending you either a plate of songpyeon or rice cakes or a plate of fried food, or both. Just pick what you want.

So thank you so much for listening. My prayer for you is: May you harvest gratitude. May you honor everyone whose legacy enables you to be here and to gift your presence to the world today. And may you find your way home, wherever and whatever home means for you.

I'll talk to you next week.