Just Give Her Her Flowers

This episode is inspired and dedicated to my late grandmother, Verna Fitch. <3

In this episode I talk about how I think giving someone flowers has a double meaning and how when someone has a crash-out like Taylor Frankie Paul's, they should be met with love and kindness, not more scrutiny. It's a little all over the place but hopefully comforting for someone grieving the loss of a loved one.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:24

Hey, hey! Welcome back to I Know a Girl, the cozy corner of the internet where we hype each other up, get raw and real, and remember, healing is hot. I'm your host, Morgan, and today's episode is a hard one. So brace yourselves. Honestly, when I was planning out my episodes and I came across the state, it was very clear to me what this episode needed to be about. So bear with me, it might be a little bit all over the place, but I definitely think it's something that everybody needs to hear. So, for many of you who don't know today, the day that this episode airs will be my grandmother's birthday, aka Mamom. She was born on March 24th, and she passed away 11 years ago at the age of 59. I know you're probably thinking, damn, she was young. And you'd be correct. But we're not gonna go into detail about that too much. She was everything you'd say about a grandma. She was loving, she was kind, she was wise, she was patient, but she was also insanely caring. That woman was definitely the biggest worrier I've ever met. But it was because she loved and cared so deeply about everyone. She probably cared more for other people than she did herself. But I remember many times growing up, she would help out anyone she could in any way she could, whether it was making meals for somebody because they lost a loved one, or making meals to cater somebody's event. She was often lending cash to some people or even offering rides where she could. I remember when she passed, the line of people that were there at calling hours went down the street. And people just kept coming in left and right to give my grandfather and our family their condolences. I remember afterwards, everybody was shocked to see the amount of people that were there. It was unreal. And the amount of flower arrangements sent from people that couldn't be there but wanted to be there, or even just people showing that she impacted them was unreal. My mom ended up giving me and my siblings, and I even think my cousins flowers from each of the bouquets to save. My grandmother's biggest catchphrase was, I love you more. And she would repeat it to all of us before leaving her house or hanging up the phone. Ironically enough, I remember years and years ago I made a Facebook status about how I hope someday I can make a positive impact on the world. Well, guess what? My grandmother, Ma Mom, commented on it saying she thinks the same thing. And guess what? Little did she know she was impacting lives just by being herself. Many people I went to grade school with even developed a relationship with her because she helped them in some way, whether it be tailoring some dresses because she was an absolute pro with a sewing machine, to even just smiling at someone every time she saw them. I think her heart would have been so full knowing she was making a difference just by being herself. Which is where the title of this episode comes from. Just give her her flowers. Because I'd like to think that my grandmother's kindness was the equivalent to someone receiving flowers. Whether it was to congratulate someone for their hard work or sending condolences and a hard time, or just giving someone something pretty and joyful to keep their thoughts present. She was always giving someone love and kindness. She was a true girl's girl. And I'm so incredibly inspired by her. I hope I'm making her proud and carrying on her legacy of giving flowers, aka love and kindness. And honestly, if she was still Earthside and I asked her to be on here, I think she would decline because I don't think she saw her the way that I see her or the way that I'm talking about her. Or maybe she did. It would have been a very good conversation. She was very much somebody that did not care what your background was. If she saw that you needed help or saw that you needed kindness or love in any way, and she was able to give it to you, she was. And I dare say that I am definitely carrying that legacy on with this podcast. So I think she'd be very proud of me. However, if uh given the opportunity to ask her to be on here, I don't think she would have accepted. She was very much a humble woman, very hard worker, very humble, very loving. I was actually just looking up a picture I have with her, because the last picture that I took with her was on my wedding day. And she played a huge part in my wedding day. Not only did she help me get dressed, but the wedding dress that I wore was my aunt's prom dress that she kept for so many years, and she ended up altering it for me for my wedding day. The last picture that I have with her was on that day. It was after she helped me get ready. And she looked so happy and so proud. So for anybody that has lost their grandmother who is struggling with grieving that loss, I'm giving you so much love. So, so much love. You are not alone. It is okay to be upset about their passing. It's okay to be sad. But I think instead of instead of like being sad on their birthday or the day that they died, I think we should start a movement or something where instead of you know remembering them in like a sad way, we should be celebrating their life. So on her birthday, we are celebrating the great person that she is today, or the day that this episode airs. And um, so yeah, definitely give somebody flowers or love and kindness where you think they need it. Who cares if they were rude to you or mean to you, you know, last week or whatever. They clearly are going through some shit that they're not talking about and they need some love and kindness. Which brings me to another thing that's been going on this week that had me insanely triggered, other than just talking about my grief of losing my grandmother. I don't know if this will land well, but I have been watching The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives because it's been helping me get out of my little perfectionism that I very much need to break. And uh I think a lot of people think of Mormons as like these perfect people that follow the Bible and you know they could do no wrong. Well, the show proves that they're very much human, just like us, and they all make mistakes and they're all learning from them. So the one girl who's like head of mom talk, I guess is what I should say, um, has been going through a lot and has been through the news, social media, like the tabloids. The poor girl is very much getting scrutinized a lot for a video of her crashing out on her baby daddy. And yes, I know her kids were in the video and her kids got harmed, and there's so much to this whole story, but like I very much think that she deserves flowers in this moment on many reasons. Okay. One, because I've been in her shoes before where I had a crash-out moment just like that. Not in the sense where I hurt my kids, but where I came out of pocket or out of character so much that like the person acting in that moment was not me. So I can very much, you know, recognize that that's not her. And when I've been in those situations, I have tried every way I can to hold on to myself and separate myself from the situation and de-escalate it so I don't get to that point. But in the past with exes and even just I've had it with my husband too, I try to remove myself, and the person has like picked and prodded me to the point that I, you know, in order to survive the moment, I'm in fight or flight, you know what I mean? So I'm either fighting for myself or I'm flighting and I'm trying to remove myself from the situation at all means possible. So I definitely think Taylor deserves flowers because one, it's hard to have a moment like that and find yourself again. Two, it's hard to have a moment like that and feel so misunderstood. I mean, and now that is out to the public. So now people are putting their two cents in where they really shouldn't. She really just deserves some love and kindness. And I think like anybody, even when they're not having a crash out like that, like even just like people that do like horrible things, I really don't think that there are bad people out there. I think they just make bad decisions. And then when you continue to like make those bad decisions, yes, you can become a bad person, but like I really do think that love overcomes all. So, like, when somebody's going through a moment where they make a mistake, we gotta give them love. Give them love, give them grace, remind them that they are worthy, remind them that they are enough. Like, you know what I mean? Because not for nothing, but we all make mistakes. We all go through shit that we don't talk about. So to point fingers at somebody, just really just to me in my state, like if you're pointing your finger at somebody else, it's because you're trying to hide your own insecurities and shadows. So not trying to hurt anybody's feelings, but I think we all need to, you know, slow down and give some kindness and love no matter what. Cause like I said, we don't know what anybody's going through behind closed doors. And your your little bit of kindness goes a long way. I know it. I know it. So some people need to realize that giving love and grace isn't just a reward, but it's a bare minimum, a basic necessity. Respect is you should always give somebody respect, no matter what. It's not an earned thing. Like, I mean, it is after somebody breaks your trust. But like, just because someone disrespects you doesn't mean you should disrespect them back. You remove yourself from the situation. Put yourself in somebody else's shoes. How would you feel if you were going through that without even giving like other context? Like just right in the moment, how would you feel? Probably shitty. So that's where you should give love and kindness, no matter what. And if you're if you're pointing fingers at somebody else, like, oh well, she shouldn't have done that. Fuck her because her kids were involved. Like, you really don't know what happened to get to that point. I might be standing on a soapbox by myself on this one, but I really think love and kindness goes a long way. Love and kindness can change a lot. Oh, and so uh let's get into our horoscope hype because the winning poll was that we're gonna name our zodiac astrology segment horoscope hype. This week's horoscope pipe is for spring because we reached the end of the zodiac season, Pisces season just ended, um, eclipse season just ended, Mercury was in retrograde, and that's over. So you might have experienced some emotional plot twists, maybe a system reset because the year of the snake had just ended, and maybe you're doing a whole lot of reflection on yourself. We stepped into the equinox, I think on the 20th or the 21st, and so we crossed the threshold into another season. We are now in Aries season. So we're gonna start our horoscope pipe for Aries, and that is spring is for planting, not for burning through your seeds to prove you have plenty. Taurus, something that felt frozen all winter is finally ready to bloom. Gemini, when given a new plot of land, don't plant the same old bad seeds. Cancer, you have the rare gift right now of making people want to grow something together. Leos, the spotlight is warming up, but only the finished work gets to stand in it. Virgos, your body has been sending up green shoots of warning for weeks. Start listening to them. Libra, one conversation, one open window equals success for you. It's that simple. Scorpios, you've been tending to something that stopped growing a long time ago. Give it up. That will bloom for years to come. Capricorns, who owns the deed to what you've built? Make sure it's you. Aquarius, the frost is melting on something you filed under friendship. Pisces, walking through last year's garden. Decide what you reseed and what you finally let go. Alright, so let's get into our little joy of the week. For starters, I've seen lots of synchronicities lately. For example, when I started recording this, I looked at the time and it said 1134. And 1134 is an angel number for me. I'll just say that. And uh so anytime that I see 1134 on the clock and something significant happens, I take it as like I'm on the right path. I'm doing what I'm supposed to. So in the next couple of weeks, I have a few guests on that I'm excited to share with you. And then the event that I've been hinting about with my sister-in-law Lex is coming soon. It's on April 18th, um, in 2026, obviously, at 2 p.m. at SparkCairo Wellness in Victor. I will have a question box in my stories this week for you to submit any questions you have about the event. Dr. Lex will be on with me to give some more info and answer questions that you guys might have about it. So, yeah, I'm really excited. That's that's the event that I've been talking about on here for episodes now. Give me a little sneak peeks, sneak peeks about it. That's why I've been uh asking for practice on giving readings, which is another joy of the week for me. I've been giving more readings. So thank you to everyone who has been asking for a reading or offering to help me get some practice in. It's so appreciated. I love you guys so much. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Another little joy is our drag truck is close to being done. We actually ripped it up and down the street a few times, gave the neighbors a show. Those are my little joys of the week. We did our horoscope pipe segment. I guess we should get on to our tarot card poll. Crazy. Can't believe that I chit-chatted so much. I feel like everything flew by. But I hope you guys are having a great week. I hope you guys are uh calling in some good intentions for this spring ink equinox. Let's get into what the universe wants to tell us today. Alright, so the card that we pull is the King of Pentacles. And the King of Pentacles signifies the pinnacle of wealth and business acumen. He embodies secure leadership, disciplined management, and the ability to generate prosperity. His generosity reflects his abundant mindset and success. So, yeah, I would have to say this validates everything that I've been saying in this entire episode. To not be greedy and to give kindness and grace and respect. With a secure leader, you have to embody respect and kindness and love. You can't be a complete jackass because then the world will be on fire like it is now. I'm not trying to get political here. Sorry. But yeah, so like you know, don't over-indul indulge. Don't be greedy, don't be stubborn. Just lead with love and kindness and respect. And it'll obviously all come back to you. You'll have abundance when you lead with love, kindness, and respect. Thank you, Young Brothers, for guiding us. Well, hopefully this episode resonated or gave you some clarity that it's okay to still be grieving the loss of your grandma. And hopefully it inspires you to celebrate their life instead of mourning it and doing stuff that inspires you and gives you joy and carries their legacy on. Giving whoever who ever lost their grandmother or a loved one and you're still mourning them, and the date has come up, whether it be their birth date or their death date, or even a date that you regularly, routinely spent time with them. I'm sending you so much love and kindness because it is fucking hard. It's hard. But I just gotta keep reminding myself that she would not want me to be sad or crying. Literally, it doesn't go for just my grandmother, but it goes for anybody that you've lost that you've really loved and cared about. They wouldn't want you spending the rest of your life grieving and being sad and mourning their life. They would definitely want you to be celebrating them. Thinking of the things that they did that gave you joy or the things that they said that made you feel loved. They want you to remember that about them. Not that they're no longer here. So I love you. I'm sending so much love to you. We're getting through it. It's fucking hard, but we're getting through it. I love you guys. I hope you enjoy the next couple of weeks on here. Love you. Bye.