NeuroShifts
Dr. Randy Cale is a psychologist and brain-change expert who offers brief but impactful episodes on rewiring the brain and body for lasting and purposeful change.
NeuroShifts
What if you never said "I'm bored" again?
Ever wonder why the phrase "I'm bored" feels like nails on a chalkboard? That's because we've collectively fallen under the spell of a dopamine-drenched lie that whispers "what's next?" at every quiet moment.
Boredom isn't actually real—it's a construct we've invented to explain the discomfort of not being constantly stimulated. Where once stillness and silence were normal parts of daily life, they now feel intolerable. Children who once stared at clouds or dug holes in dirt just to see what was there now experience a crisis without screens or structured activities. Adults who once paused and reflected now text while waiting in line, scroll while watching TV, and fill every silent gap with stimulation.
For parents, the solution to the "I'm bored" trap is surprisingly simple but requires courage: stop feeding the boredom beast. When your child inevitably declares boredom, calmly respond with "Okay, I'm sure you'll figure something out"—then walk away. Let their creativity wrestle with empty space. This isn't cruelty; it's how emotional resilience and imagination grow. For adults, try removing "bored" from your vocabulary entirely. Instead of reaching for your phone, try redirecting with powerful alternatives: "I'm open to what's next," "I invite stillness right now," or "Where can I find joy without adding more?" These aren't just affirmations but brain hacks that redirect focus toward curiosity and peace rather than dopamine.
Quietness isn't emptiness—it's opportunity. Stillness is where creativity lives, where intuition flourishes, where your best insights emerge. If you constantly fill every space, you miss the power of the pause. For those struggling with an overactive mind that can't find peace, neurofeedback offers a research-backed, drug-free approach to restore your brain's natural rhythm. Can we raise a generation unafraid of quiet moments? Can we become adults who no longer chase constant stimulation to feel alive? Your journey to rediscovering the magic of stillness begins when you stop labeling it as boredom.
Click here to view our Google Slides presentation: Boredom-The-Myth-That-Keeps-on-Taking
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Boredom, the myth that keeps on taking. A mom recently told me if I hear I'm bored one more time, I'm going to lose it. I nodded sympathetically. Then she added and I'm just as bad. I can't sit still for a second without reaching for my phone. What happened to us? What happened? Indeed, we've collectively fallen under the spell of a lie, a sweet-sounding, dopamine-drenched lie that whispers what's next? What's next? As if quietude, stillness or calm were our enemy. As a result, the moment stillness creeps in, boom, the voice of boredom strikes and, like a mosquito in the night, it buzzes until we swat it away with something, anything.
Speaker 1:Let's pull back the curtain on this very human and very modern condition we call boredom. Boredom isn't real, but it is dangerous. Here's the truth. Bomb. No one likes to admit. Boredom isn't a real problem. It's a construct, an illusion we've invented to explain the unsettling discomfort of not being stimulated.
Speaker 1:Once upon a time, being still was normal. Silence wasn't feared. Children sat with themselves, made up games, stared at clouds or dug holes in the dirt just to see what was there. Adults paused, pondered and reflected, without the twitch to scroll, binge or swipe. Now that inner quiet feels intolerable, and for kids it's practically a crisis if there isn't a screen, a plan, a sport or a snack in hand. Boredom has become the default label when there's nothing immediate to distract the brain. But that's exactly where the magic used to live in the quiet, gentle, finding, creating and discovering the parental trap.
Speaker 1:Stop feeding the boredom beast. We love our kids. We want them to be happy, but in the pursuit of happiness, many of us have become chronic entertainers, chauffeur therapists and on-call cruise directors. The result Kids lose their capacity to self-generate, joy, creativity and focus. Why should they try when someone else is always ready to solve? I'm bored. Moms, dads. Here's the fix Stop feeding it. That means no immediate suggestions, no rescue attempts, no guilt about how you should help them find happiness right now, and not generating idea after idea. Instead, when the inevitable I'm bored shows up, try this calmly neutral response Okay, I'm sure you'll figure something out. Then walk away. Yes, walk away. Don't make eye contact, don't get pulled into the drama. Let your child's creativity wrestle with the empty space. Let them meet the discomfort of their own mind. This is how emotional resilience is born. If you're consistent and brave enough to withstand the initial groans and eye rolls, you'll watch your child grow their ability to sit with life as it is, not just as they want it to be Adults, it's time to retire the word bored.
Speaker 1:And what about us grown-ups? We've been sold the same illusion that every moment needs to be filled or it's meaningless. So we text while waiting in line, scroll while watching TV, play video games for hours, check out Facebook, reaching for stimulation in every silent gap. Ironically, we're busier than ever and yet often feel empty. Feel empty.
Speaker 1:This is not my opinion. It's the overwhelming data, growing stronger year by year. The more we do, the more we chase an experience that will satisfy. Yet the more we chase, the more we want, with very limited satisfaction following. If it were so satisfying, wouldn't we want to linger, pause and cherish those satisfying feelings? Notice, we do not do that.
Speaker 1:Maybe consider a change. Let's start by vetoing the word bored from our vocabulary, not because it's evil, but because it leads us down a false, unfulfilling path. The mind that labels boredom is simply a mind that's uncomfortable being without something to entertain it. Right now, being simply present is feared, and the mind that's uncomfortable being present is one that will never be satisfied, no matter how much you feed it. Instead, when inclined to boredom, consider stopping and contemplating something different.
Speaker 1:Try these. I'm open to what's next. I invite a bit of stillness right now. Where can I find joy without adding more? Who do I love and what can I savor about them? For a few moments, can I be still here now? Where is there beauty I can notice and enjoy? Let me just be with my breathing for five minutes, see what arises, what's already in my life that I haven't fully appreciated today. What could I hear that I have never really listened to before? These aren't just fluffy affirmations, they're brain hacks. These simple questions and statements rewire our focus toward curiosity, gratitude and peace, not dopamine.
Speaker 1:Quietness, stillness, pausing is not emptiness. It's opportunity. Here's the big shift. Instead of reacting to quiet as if it's a problem, we begin to see stillness as the entry point to deeper experience. That's where creativity lives, that's where intuition lives. That's where your best insights, your strongest sense of self and your emotional stability come from.
Speaker 1:If you constantly fill the space, you miss the power of the pause. If you constantly fix your child's boredom, you deny them the opportunity to build resilience, imagination and focus. And if you continually label your discomfort as boredom, you give up the very gift your nervous system is begging you for a little peace, a gentle nudge for the restless mind. In our practice, we often see both kids and adults stuck in this loop, chasing more while enjoying less. That restless brain keeps seeking stimulation but rarely finds peace. Neurofeedback offers a research-backed, drug-free way to help calm the overactive mind and restore the brain's natural rhythm of engagement and stillness. Reach out at CapitalDistrictNeurofeedbackcom to learn more. Conclusion Can we raise a generation that doesn't fear the quiet and needs to constantly chase what's next, and can we live as adults who no longer need to chase stimulation to feel alive? I wonder.