Episode 6: Rooted & Recovered - When You’re Finally Tired of You.

What if the thing you're still clinging to is the very thing keeping you stuck?

In this raw, honest episode of Rooted & Recovered, Dan and Justin dig deep into Step Six of the 12-Step journey: “We were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.”

This isn’t just about being tired of your mess—it’s about being ready to let God remove it. Step Six is the place where survival strategies meet surrender, and where coping mechanisms are finally laid at the feet of the One who can actually bring transformation.

 Key Highlights:

• The difference between being tired of consequences and sick of the cycle
• What you protect from God, you keep—and what you keep, keeps you
• Our defects often started as survival mechanisms, but now they sabotage our growth
• Psalm 139:23–24 becomes your bold, dangerous prayer of surrender
• Isaiah’s encounter with God (Isaiah 6) shows that purification always comes before purpose

Scriptures Covered:
Psalm 139:23–24 • Isaiah 6:5–8 • Jeremiah 29:11 • John 15 • Romans 3:23 • Matthew 5:8 • James 1:4

 Final Truth:
God doesn’t use perfect people—He uses surrendered ones. And the truth is, you’ll never change what you’re still trying to control. Step Six is your moment to stop bargaining and finally say: “God, I’m entirely ready. Take what I can’t carry.”

Transcript

0:00

This world doesn't hand out healing. It offers quick fixes, cheap pies and empty promises, but real recovery. It takes roots. Roots that dig deep into truth, into identity, into the unshakeable grace of God. We're not here to sugarcoat the struggle. We've lived it. Addiction, shame, relapse, regret, but we've also seen resurrection. We've seen what happened. Happens when broken people get anchored in something real rooted and recovered is more than a podcast. It's a battleground for the soul. A place where scars tell stories, where scripture speaks louder than shame, where freedom isn't just a word. It's a war we win daily. So if you're tired of surface level answers, if you want truth that convicts, hope that heals, and conversations that cut through the noise, you're in the right place. Welcome to Rooted and Recovered.

Justin: 1:08

Welcome everybody to another exciting episode of Rooted and Recovered. This is one half of the Dynamic duo, Justin Miller. I am joined as always with Dan. Dan, how are you doing today?

Dan: 1:20

I'm doing great, brother. It is a beautiful day and uh, I couldn't think of anything better to do than sit in a studio with you and talk about step six today, brother. Step six,

Justin: 1:36

man. You ever been so sick and tired of just being sick and tired? Mm-hmm. Everybody's been there. Right? But the question isn't if you're sick and tired, the question is, are you ready to stop? Being sick and tired, because that's what step six is about, when you're finally tired of you. Mm-hmm. Right. Step six, we are entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. And like I said, are you ready? Or are you just tired? Because there is a difference. There's plenty of days that I wake up tired, but I still get up and go to work. Mm-hmm. There's plenty of days that I wake up tired and I still go do what Justin needs to do. But there are days when Justin is ready to take a break, when he is ready to lay down, when he has to, and that's where we're at in step six. We've already committed our lives to Christ. We've already admitted we needed help. And if you're here today and this is your first time, I would encourage you go back to step one, go back to episode one and start listening. And there's no shame. Do not despise humble beginnings. Go back to the beginning. But for those of us who's been on this journey, today is the day that we have to understand. Something has to change. And that's what this is about. When you get to that moment and you realize that something has to change,

Dan: 3:19

Justin, you asked the the question, are you ready or just tired? and let's just be real. Everybody wants change but not everyone is ready. there's a difference between being tired of the consequences and being sick of the cycle, and step six, Justin, it's not about being perfect. It's about being positioned. It's about being willing, and it's about being open and surrendered. And until family, listen to me, until you are entirely ready, you'll keep bargaining with your dysfunction. You'll say things like, well, I'm working on it, or, you know, I, I'm doing better, or, or, you know what, man, at least I'm not as bad as I used to be. are you ready to let it go? Or are you still defending what's destroying you? Because family, you can't be delivered from something that you keep

Justin: 4:24

justifying. I think of it as a masterpiece that God's trying to create with us. Right? And you think of him. He's got a chiseling hand and he's knocking off those chunks that don't need to be there. Right? He's making you, he's molding you into the image of Christ that he desires.'cause along with that image of Christ comes healing, along with that image of Christ comes that Godfidence, as I like to call it, where you can realize it's not about me, it's about him. But here's the thing about God, he's perfect in all his ways. Meaning when he's swinging that chisel and hammer, he's not missing the mark. Mm-hmm. The problem is too often, I like what you said, we're defending, we are moving out of the way because we're just not quite ready to give that up yet. Ah, God. You know, I know that's a hard part of my life, but I'm just not quite ready to let it go and there's many different reasons for that. Sometimes it's'cause we're comfortable in the chaos. You'd be surprised how many times you hear people say is, I won't know anything else other than chaos. So how can I find peace in it? Because fear of the unknown. Is a very real fear. And then there's other times when we're just not ready to let go of it because we're not, we're scared of the unknown and we're scared of what we'll become. You're scared of what the future holds, not only around you, but in you, because who will you be without that? If you don't get anxious over this, what are you gonna replace it with? Well, let me tell you something. If you are in Christ, you are gonna replace it with Christ-like things. But in order for that to happen, you have to be ready.

Dan: 6:02

For that to happen. Well, think about that, Justin. How many times do we bargain with the, the chaos and the dysfunction in our lives? How, if I'm being honest with myself, how many times did I look somebody in the face, deep into my addiction and say, well, I'm, I'm working on it. you know, that old, that old children's song, we used to sing in Sunday school. he's still working on me. how many times have we said that? But all we're doing is defending what is destroying me. And that's what I love about this step right here, Justin. This is a real, honest, real step. It has nothing to do with being perfect. Stop thinking you're gonna be perfect. Stop thinking you're gonna have it all figured out. What this step is all about, Justin, is about you and I being positioned, you and I being willing and open, and more importantly, being willing to surrender that to God.

Justin: 6:58

And I love what you said. It's willing. That's all God's asking you to do did. That's it, dude. He's not asking you to get it figured out. He's not asking you to do it. He's just asking you to be willing. That's why if you haven't done it, go back to step one. Understand you're not God. Understand that he is God, and understand that you need God and then give to God. Right? Understand that it's God who's gonna do this work in you, and it's hard. I've, I've tried getting rid of those things in my life that I didn't want to be there. But when I came to God, I watched those things fall away in a way that I could never imagine. you look at our character defects and you might think, well, what are they? Well, oftentimes. Their coping mechanisms that we have built up in our life over time trying to deal with the trauma because instead of facing it, it was easier to pretend it wasn't there.

Dan: 7:57

Mm, that's good.

Justin: 8:00

It's like the person who every time something happened in their house where there was fighting and violence. They'd run to their room and they'd turn their TV on and they'd lose themselves in the screen. Mm-hmm. And they'd pretend that they were the characters on the screen so that their life would feel better. And then they grow up and they wonder why. Well, why do I have a hard time being honest with people? Because your whole life, you spent lying to yourself. Why do I struggle with pornography? Because your whole life, you've been putting yourself in other people's movies. You've been pretending to be somebody you're not. But this is us saying, God, I'm tired of pretending, but not only am I tired, I'm ready for you to

Dan: 8:46

remove it because I can't. you said it, those are lies that we tell ourselves. Why, so we can stay broken. Justin. And you hit the nail on the head just a, a few moments ago. Our character defects are often tied to our survival strategies, those coping mechanisms, if you will, that we built in chaos. Think about this anger. It made you what? It made you feel powerful. What control give you, it gave you security. What's people pleasing doing? It's making you feel needed. But now what's once served you, Justin, is now sabotaging you. That very coping mechanism, that very survival strategy, that wall, if you will, that you have built up around your life, that thing that used to protect you is now destroying you. It's sabotaging you, friend. But I love what David said, and we just talked about this a couple episodes ago in Psalms chapter 139:23- 24. Get your Bible out. Highlight this scripture right here because this. Is a powerful, bold prayer that when somebody's ready for change, this is the type of prayer you pray. If you're not, don't read this prayer family, because I'm telling you, it's a real, bold, honest, raw prayer. But listen to what David said. He said, search me God. Not search me friend, not search me, counselor, not search me, uh, dope or alcohol or whatever. That, that, that survival strategy. Search me, uh, anger, search me, control, search me. People pleasing, no. David is saying, search me God, and know my heart. Test me and know my anxious thoughts. Verse 24 says, see if there is any offense in me and lead me in the way everlasting. Justin, this is not a polite prayer. It's dangerous. It's the kind of prayer that invites God into the rooms that you have. Kept locked, but it's also just the kind of prayer that leads to true lasting change, not just behavior modifications, Justin, but we're talking a pure heart transformation because the thing is family, God won't force his way into areas that you are still trying to manage.

Justin: 11:29

So what are you trying to manage today? I have to ask myself that question in the morning. You see, everybody thinks repentance is a one time and done thing. Every day I wake up and say, Lord, search me know my heart. Test my thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you and lead me in the way everlasting. You see, here's the thing. If we want to be led in the way, everlasting, the way to life goes through Christ.

Dan: 11:57

Mm

Justin: 11:57

Guess what Christ says, if you abide in my love, I will be with you and you will have eternal life. The problem is if we're hiding things from God and trying to protect things that he's telling us to get rid of, guess what we're doing? Saying, God, your love isn't good enough. I don't want you to have that part of me. I'm not ready to give up that thing in my life that you're telling me to give up. Let me tell you, that's a scary place to be because when you're there, you're not ready. And you wonder why day after day you get up and you struggle with the same thing over and over again. And I know you're sick. I know you're tired, and that's good and that's great, but you have to be ready when it comes to this step, and that's why it's important. To have the Holy Spirit in your life because he will give you the strength to say that bold prayer. You see, it's only through God that this has truly accomplished, and I'm not taking away from the programs, I'm not taking away right from the, the treatments and all that. But what I am saying is, like Dan said, if you want real lasting change, if you want life and life more abundantly, you have to give yourself over to the vine dresser. Let him till that soil. Let him remove the rock. Let him remove the thorn and thistle and let his word plant on the tender soil. That is your heart. That's what this is. This is us saying, God, I'm ready for you to have my heart, all of it. Remove those things that choke your word out.

Dan: 13:41

Amen. And that's the thing, guys. I'd said this just a few moments ago. God won't force his ways into areas of your life that you're still trying to manage. And here's the cold hard truth, what you protect, guess what family you keep. And here is a, it's the brutal truth. Anything you protect from God, guess what? You keep. So what does that mean? You'll keep bitterness. I. That means you'll keep jealousy. and God will let you until you finally say, I don't want this anymore. Justin. This is what makes step six so powerful. It's where your healing becomes intentional. Guess what? It's not about your feelings. You might feel attached to it, but willingness is saying, God, even if I'm scared to lose it, I trust you to replace it because you'll never change family what you're still trying to control.

Justin: 14:51

We're entirely ready. That means beyond a shadow of a doubt, that codependency, that you're struggling with that, like Dan said, that anger, that bitterness, that rage. What about that fear of rejection?

Dan: 15:06

Mm-hmm.

Justin: 15:06

You don't wanna let it go. You think, well man, I would, but how am I, how am I gonna know that I'm loved? Look at the cross. Look at what he's done. Look at what he's doing. Look at what he's gonna do. You see, God promises us in Jeremiah 29 for I know the plans I have for you.

Dan: 15:28

Yep.

Justin: 15:29

Right Now, I'm not gonna sit here and tell you that every day here on this earth, who, man, it's great and it's gravy and you're not gonna struggle. Right? And you're not gonna have hard days. But what I am gonna tell you is he has a spiritual plan for your life that is good, that is found in him. That one day you will walk on streets of gold where there is no sorrow, there is no pain. But let me tell you something, you can have strength in this life to overcome those things that come against you right here. You feel like you struggle with patience and you're always being impatient. Why not ask God to remove that from you and let him give you the same patience that he had with you for your whole life before you came to him. You feel like you can't trust anybody. You feel like those, those just those issues that nobody else knows about, but you project, right? Because what we don't realize is oftentimes those things in us. That we dislike the most are the things the rest of the world sees.

Dan: 16:35

Amen.

Justin: 16:36

They're the things that everybody out there, your family members, they see when you get angry, they see, they see your trust issues, they see your brokenness. God sees it, and let me tell you something, he's not scared.

Dan: 16:53

No, he's

Justin: 16:53

not. He's not waiting there with a ruler in his hand to smack you for. You know, how dare you be like this? He's saying, I know you're like this. Are you ready for me to

Dan: 17:05

take

Justin: 17:05

it?

Dan: 17:06

Well, that's the spirit of religion. Justin, I was raised in a, a, a religion. Um, I didn't have a relationship with God till I was 33 years old. I was raised in a religion to where, you know, you were scared to the altar. You were scared to be serving God and then you were scared during your whole time you served God that one wrong move, that he was going to blast you with a lightning bolt and just wipe you off the face of this earth. And that's what, that's a major problem. That's why so many people stay stuck. But I love what you said, Jeremiah 29:11 for. I know the plans I have for you. Declares who the Lord, the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you hope. And a future. Now, I don't know about you family, but when I was in my deepest part of my addiction, even early in my recovery, Justin, two words, I knew nothing about hope and future. Hmm. I knew nothing about those. But when I gave my heart and my life to the Lord and I surrendered my will and I, and I confessed not only to God but to that accountability partner like we just talked about last week, and now in this step six that I'm literally. Entirely just sick and tired, and I'm ready to have God to remove all those defects, all those things that are making my character bad, that God is saying, you know what? Dan, I already got you. I got plans for you. I got plans to prosper you. What addiction tried to do to you to kill you? I've got plans to prosper you. When suicidal thoughts tried to harm you? I got plans. Dan, that's not to harm you. In fact, I give you hope. I give you future and family. You can't find that and you won't. Find that in anything in this world besides Jesus and Justin. I know that's a bold statement, man, but I'm telling you, family, I've been there, I've done that. I've tried that. I've banked hope into things. I've banked hope into people, and I've banked hope into programs for them to only let me down. But only Jesus family can satisfy your soul. He says to you. I have plans for you. Plans to prosper you not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Justin: 19:50

And the reason he has plans for you is because he loves you. Amen. You see, God loves you right where you are, but you know what else? God loves you enough not to leave you there. He doesn't want to see. You continue to struggle with the same things you've been struggling with. Now, sometimes he'll use those things to refine us. Yeah. Because we need to be refined and he'll uses those things to get us to that point where we're entirely ready. Mm-hmm. You know, for a long time I struggled with anger. I'm not gonna say that I'm perfect and that every once in a while, that old man, and we'll talk snap of a finger. Mm-hmm. The old Justin sometimes is woo. Oh yeah. But before I came to Christ, that was a part of my identity. If you ask people about me, they were gonna say that he was angry. Right. And that's a character defect because that anger for a long time. It kept people at bay and it kept people from getting close because I had such a fear of rejection that I didn't even want people to get close to me. I had abandonment issues and trust issues. So my defense mechanism was to just keep people at bay. And then I came to Christ and I just let'em love me. And I remember getting mad at my son one day and I stopped and I said, is this really. You know, I had been sick and tired of it before, right? I had been, you know, in that, oh, woe is me. But that's the difference. And the Bible talks about worldly sorrow and godly sorrow. This was that point where it was no longer woe is me. It's God, this isn't me. This isn't who you're asking me to be, and I'm ready for you to remove it. And he did. It wasn't, he didn't smack me in the mouth and punch me in the gut and tell me, just suck it up buttercup. Put your boots on. He said, Justin, I, I love you in spite of this. Yep.

Dan: 21:58

Yeah. I have plans for you. It's because you encountered his holiness, Justin. And that's what happens fam when you encounter his holiness. And it brings us to, our scripture focus for today, and that was in Isaiah's encounter. I encourage you to go to Isaiah chapter six and read verses five through eight. This is what it says. Just says, woe to me. I cried. This is Isaiah the prophet talking. Woe to me, I cried. I am ruined for I am a man of unclean lips and I have lived among a people of unclean lips and my eyes have seen the king. The Lord Almighty. Then one of the seraphim flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with tongs from the altar with it. He touched my mouth and said, see, this has touched your lips. Your guilt is taken away and your sin atoned for Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, whom shall I send and who will go for us? And I said, this is Isaiah. And I said, here I am. Send me. Now you think about this for a moment, Justin. When Isaiah is brought face to face with the glory of God, his first reaction isn't to sing, it was to shatter. He doesn't raise his hands. This man drops to his knees and he cries. Woe to me. I am ruined for, I am a man of unclean lips, but that's the power family of holy confrontation. You see, the closer you get to God, the more. Clearly you see how broken you still are. But see, God didn't leave Isaiah in the wreckage. He's not leaving you in the wreckage today. In fact, the Bible says he takes a live coal from the altar and he touches Isaiah's mouth. Not to punish him family, but to purify him. And he says, your guilt. Has been taken away. Your sin has been atoned for, and right here in the ashes of confession, we just talked about this in the last episode, step five guys, go back and read that in the ashes of confession, what happens? Justin purpose is born because the very next thing Isaiah hears God asking is, whom shall I send and whom shall go for us? And the very next thing Isaiah says is, here I am. Send me. Do you see the shift? He went from, I am ruined. To one encounter with God to I am ready. He went from I'm unclean to that encounter with God to I am available. And this is what God does, family. He doesn't skip over the brokenness. He redeems it and he releases you into your purpose because of it. Family purification always comes before purpose. Because God doesn't use perfect people. He uses surrendered ones,

Justin: 25:24

and before that comes honesty. You have to get honest with yourself and realize that there are things in your life that God doesn't approve of. I, this is coming from a pastor, so you're thinking, oh, it's just a pastor preaching the sermon. Let me tell you, as a brother in Christ, because look, you can call me Pastor Justin all day, but at the end of the day, Jesus Christ is the head of every church I've ever attended, and all I am is a brother in tribulation. A brother in suffering is John would say, and let me tell you, the one thing I've learned is that if I'm not willing to get honest, if I'm not willing to put away those. Things that God told me to put away that I'm never gonna be ready. This is us saying, Lord, I'm ready. And look, it's here. It's here. And I think I think of a baptism. I think of you going into the water and you coming out. This is the other side of that. This is being raised to new life. This is the old falling away. The old has to fall away for the new to come, but you have to be ready for it to fall away because too many times we're holding onto these things in our life for no reason at all. They don't bring anything good,

Dan: 26:57

right?

Justin: 26:58

But God does. For, I know the plans I have for you, and I love, I love this about Isaiah and this is to that Christian today. Who thinks that, man, you've got it made. Can I tell you something? Isaiah was a prophet. Yep. Isaiah had been a prophet. This wasn't first chapter Isaiah before he came. This is Isaiah six. He was already called doing what God had asked him to do, and now he stands in the presence of a mighty God. And I don't understand why people think that God has changed. That is the same God then as it is today. And guess what, Isaiah, it's the same response I had when I was in that moment, Dan, when I was talking about, I said, God, woe is me. And he said, I understand that hot coal. That's Jesus Christ. He comes and those character defects, he burns them away. It's the fire of the Holy Spirit. It's the touch of God that pushes those things out of your life that doesn't need to be there. But like Isaiah, we need to fall down first and say, Lord, I have these in my life and I'm ready for you to get rid of them.

Dan: 28:11

That's the thing. It, that's what Isaiah did. He, he said, Woe is me. I'm a man of unclean lips. And then he gives his life. He offers himself to God, Justin, and that's what you gotta do, family. It's not about being perfect. It's not about having everything all figured out. It's just being willing and available, but more importantly, having a surrendered heart to God. So the

Justin: 28:39

question, what are you still gripping?

Dan: 28:43

Hmm?

Justin: 28:43

Ask yourself today, what am I still holding onto? What character defect am I not willing to let go of? And then ask yourself why Notice it doesn't say character or tribute. These things that God's asking us to remove aren't the good parts of us that right. Make everybody like us. These are the parts of us that. That hurt others. These are the parts of us that not only hurt others, if we're being honest, they break us. But look, there is a beauty in being broken. Mm-hmm. Because it's there that God can finally show up and show out. When I came to the end of me, God started, and this is us coming to the end of us and saying, God, I'm ready

Dan: 29:33

for you to start. Amen. You know, what is that one thing? Family. Justin asked a good question and it's making me even think about it right now as we're doing this podcast. What's that one thing you're still holding onto? But you know, you know, deep down inside that God has been asking you to release it. What is it? Is it pride? Is it control? Is it fear of being vulnerable? Is it a hard heart towards someone who's hurt you? But see, family, step six is where you and I stop saying maybe someday, and we start saying today because there's no freedom, without willingness and no willingness, family without surrender. You see, this isn't about behavior, it's about posture. Are your hands still clenched? Are they finally open? Justin, we're about to wrap this podcast up, brother. I could keep going on and on about this. Is there anything you want to close with before we, uh, say goodbye to the listener this week?

Justin: 30:49

I just wanna do a little bit of housekeeping. Um, guys, when you hear the word support, you think. They want money. They're just asking for donations. We're not, you know, when I think of support, I think of the brother standing next to me that's getting ready to ask God to remove those character defects and they just need somebody to lean on. Mm-hmm. You see, this is about more than a podcast. This is about a family. This is about a forever family in Christ. Guys, pray for one another. Pray for us. Pray for this ministry. Pray that these podcasts get out and reach the one that needs to hear it. We ask you to like, share, subscribe. Go to our Facebook page, check out the Instagram page. We're getting started. Go to our podcast page, let people know that there's hope in Christ. Amen. And guys, be there for one another. Look, we have a Facebook page and I want to encourage you, and I've seen it on our prayer request, man, if you're going through something, just say it. Put it out there. And if you're the one reading that pray, don't just say, Hey, I'm gonna pray. Mm-hmm. Take time and pray because this is what it's about. Christian brothers and sisters. Being the Christian brothers and sisters that God's called us to

Dan: 32:28

be. Amen guys. God's ready, grace. It's available. It's abundant. The question is, are you, I'm not talking about just being tired of the consequences. I'm not just talking about being aware of your defects. But I'm asking you today, are you entirely ready? Like step six says, are you entirely ready to lay it all down to allow God to remove what you've been trying to manage? Family. We love and honor you. We thank you so much for allowing us into your home, to your vehicle, into your ear. Justin said, pray for us. Jesus said he took his disciples out and he said, look, the fields are ripe for harvest, but even Jesus made a prayer request. He said, but pray for workers because they're few. We need your prayer family. We need your support, like and share these podcasts. Get this podcast out to someone that you know could use it. Until next time, family stay rooted, stay recovered, and let's get to work.

33:56

You are not just surviving. You are becoming, becoming rooted in truth, becoming recovered by grace, and becoming the person God always knew you could be. Thanks for joining us on Rooted in Recovered. If this episode stirred something in you, don't keep it to yourself. Share it, live it, let it take root. We'll see you next time right here where scars become testimonies and hope rises from the ashes.