Episode 7: Rooted & Recovered - Let Go for Real

What if the very thing you're clinging to is the thing that’s controlling you?

In this raw and unfiltered episode of Rooted & Recovered, Dan and Justin walk through Step Seven of the 12-Step journey: “We humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.”

This is the line in the sand, the moment where faith gets real. It’s not about just asking God to help—you’re asking Him to take it for real. This is the step where you stop bargaining and start breaking free, where survival strategies are replaced with true surrender, and where the posture of humility unlocks real transformation.

Key Highlights:

• What you cling to is what controls you
• Control is a prison disguised as protection
• Humility isn’t a feeling—it’s a choice to let go
• Why some people choose to limp through life instead of walking in freedom
• Paul’s thorn and the power of God’s sufficient grace (2 Corinthians 12:9)
• Why healing doesn’t start when the pain goes away, but when control does

Scriptures Covered:
1 Peter 5:6-7 • 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 • Isaiah 6:5-8 • Romans 12:2 • Matthew 11:28-30

 Final Truth:
Real freedom begins when you stop managing the chaos and let go for real. It’s not about earning your healing—it’s about trusting that God is already enough.

Pray for this episode to reach someone who’s ready to surrender for real. Like, share, and tag a friend who needs this message today.

Transcript

0:00

This world doesn't hand out healing. It offers quick fixes, cheap pies and empty promises, but real recovery. It takes roots. Roots that dig deep into truth, into identity, into the unshakeable grace of God. We're not here to sugarcoat the struggle. We've lived it. Addiction, shame, relapse, regret, but we've also seen resurrection. We've seen what happened. Happens when broken people get anchored in something real rooted and recovered is more than a podcast. It's a battleground for the soul. A place where scars tell stories, where scripture speaks louder than shame, where freedom isn't just a word. It's a war we win daily. So if you're tired of surface level answers, if you want truth that convicts, hope that heals, and conversations that cut through the noise, you're in the right place. Welcome to Rooted and Recovered.

Dan: 1:08

Welcome to another episode of Rooted and Recovered. I am your host, Dan Pyles. I've got in the studio with me today, my brother in Christ, and partner in this Justin, how you doing today? My friend. Blessed and highly favored Dan. Blessed and highly favored. Always good to see you. Justin. I'm gonna start this podcast out just real. Uh, and I'm gonna start with an opening statement. What you clinging to is what controls you. Think about that for just a moment. What you clinging to is what controls you. And the title of today's podcast is Let Go For Real, step Seven Guys. Man, we are moving right along in this series and we've hope you've enjoyed it as much as we have. But step seven, Justin tells us that we've humbly asked him to remove our shortcomings. So, lemme go back to the my opening statement. What you clinging to is what controls you. You see family because at this point in your journey, you've already done the hard work. You've acknowledged the mess, you've named your shortcomings, you've listed the damage you've done and the pain you've endured. But now comes the hardest part, letting it. Go, and here's the truth that most people don't want to admit. Some of us Justin don't want to be healed because we've gotten comfortable with the wound. See, step seven is that line in the sand. It's not just saying, God, help me, is saying, God, take it. I don't want it anymore.

Justin: 2:57

And it's asking him to do it. It's not us trying to do it ourselves. It's not another, Justin can fix this or Dan can fix this. It's not another, oh man, if I just try a little harder moment in my life, I'm going to get it right. It's us humbly asking God to do it. And you know, it's crazy that that word humble's in there because what is more humble? Than asking God to do it. Because to be humble is to say, God, I can't. You can. And that's what I love about these steps because if you look in every step you can see every other step in it sure can. Humbling admitting that I can't do it and God can, recognizing that he's God, turning it over to God, confessing that I need him, giving it to God. And here we're saying. God, I'm done. But this is where we're done for real.

Dan: 3:55

Absolutely. Step seven, just it's that line in the sand. It's like I said just a moment ago, it's not saying, God, help me. We're not at that point anymore at this step. At this point in the game, fam, we're saying, God, take it. I don't want it anymore, and it's releasing that very thing that used to protect you. We just talked about this in the last episode, the control, anger, pride, bitterness, addiction, those things, family that numbed your pain, but also numbed your purpose. And here's the raw question. This step asks, do you trust God to take what you used to survive?'cause guys, step seven isn't about asking God to remove it and then picking it back up later, like it's some type of backup plan. It's about a surrender Justin with no return policy.

Justin: 4:56

Well, you know. It's oftentimes in our life that we come to this crossroad, and here's the thing, you're gonna come here again and again. Oh yeah. You're gonna get to this place where you have to let go for real. And like Dan said, this is us saying, God, take it. And that's what he does, but he also wants you to come to him and say, God, take it. I think of the story, the Israelites. They had crossed the Jordan, they had won the Battle of Jericho. They seen praise bring down walls, right Man, what a victory that was. But then they go up against a small little place known as ai. Only 12,000 people in the whole town. Mm-hmm. So how their army couldn't have been many and they say, ah, we're not gonna trouble ourselves. We're not even gonna bring the army. We're just gonna bring 3000 men. They ain't even gotta be the best of them. They go up and they get their hind in kicked and they come back and Joshua goes before the Lord. He says, God, I don't know what I don't know. Why'd you bring me here? What's going on man? Why wouldn't you just leave us over there if this was the plan? And what does God do? He says, Hey, hey, hey, hey. Get up. You are holding on to something. There is something in your camp that I told you to let go of. You wonder why you're losing this battle. It's because you refuse to let go of what I've already told you to give up. Very good. Very good. He doesn't say Keep crying. Oh, keep trying. He says, get up, wipe your face off. Quit mourning. Put on the robes of righteousness. Get it out of your camp, and go win that battle. But we have to be willing to get it out of our camp. And this is us saying, God, get it out of the camp.

Dan: 6:42

So good. And that's what step seven is, Justin. It's, it's saying, I'm done carrying what's been killing me, even if it's all I've ever known. See, this is the moment, fam, where faith gets real, where surrender stops being a concept and becomes a choice because here's the, here's the truth. You can't be healed by the same hands that are still holding your wounds. Because as long as you're still holding onto the pain, as long as you're still holding onto that defense mechanism, the habits and the lies, you're not in posture to receive healing. Because healing family requires open hands and open hands can't cling. They can only release and receive family. This. Is the posture of humility right here, and Peter said it best, Justin in 1st Peter 5:6-7. It lays it out plainly, says humble. We go back to that word, humble again. Justin Humble. Humble yourselves. Therefore, under God's mighty hand that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. But I don't wanna rush past this. Because this is the posture family that unlocks real transformation. It says, humble yourselves family. That's not a feeling, that's a position. It's a choice to stop managing the chaos and admit, I need help. Then I love what he says, that he may lift you up. Does that mean? It means you can stop trying to climb out of, of what only God can lift you from,

Justin: 8:45

and that word humble. So many times we think of it as, oh, I have to think of myself as less. No, it just means think of yourself less and start thinking about what God wants more. And I love it because we always want to go to that casting right. We're gonna talk about that.'cause casting, that's a great part and it's something we've gotta do. But before we get there, we've gotta first realize that I can't do that on my own. All the strength in my, everything I've ever done on my own has never been good enough, right? So why do I think I can go and cast all my care on him on my own? If anything I've ever done before, that's not been good enough. Right? And that's what humbling ourselves is it's saying, God, I really can't. I know you can, but not only do I know you can I trust you can.

Justin (2): 9:32

Amen.

Justin: 9:33

I I have a promise. From you that says you can, not only can you, you are willing and able to do it.

Dan: 9:40

Amen. And that verse right there, we just talked about it just a few moments ago, that he may lift you up. He, he, you know, not, not your friend, not your spouse, not your pastor, not your, your a program that you're following as good as all those things are. It says that he may lift you up, and there's so many times, Justin, that we've tried to do this thing on our own or we've relied on this or we've relied on that and what God is telling us through. The word here is that you and I can stop trying to climb out of something that only God can lift you from. Then Peter says, like Justin said, to cast. Your anxiety on him, and I looked that word cast up, uh, Justin. Um, that word cast doesn't mean to gently hand off. Uh, it means to hurl throw, to launch your burden onto the only one strong enough to carry it. This means you're not talking about your pain, you're releasing it. You're not venting anymore family. You're surrendering. Why? Because humility says, I don't have the strength, but I know the one who does. Family humility isn't self pity. It's not walking around defeated it. It's the boldest kind of faith. It's a faith who trusts God with the parts of you that are still messy. The parts of you that are still anxious, the parts of you that are still unfinished, and here's the kicker. You don't have to have it all figured out. All you gotta understand is that he just will. He'll do it. He just will. It's your job to release. It's his job to restore

Justin: 11:31

and the power comes in the choice. Mm. You see, so many times we think that we have to have the strength to do this. Like I said, you don't, but he does. But when we choose, when we are willing to be willing, right. When we are willing to be willing, God can and will. And I love what you said there, Dan. It's the humility of trusting God with it. It's easy to trust somebody I can see. Right. But I don't trust them'cause they're gonna let me down.

Justin (2): 12:08

Mm-hmm.

Justin: 12:10

But to put your trust in somebody that, well, they say you can't see. But as I look out the window today, Dan, on the ride here every morning when I get up, I see the visible qualities of an invisible God all over this world. Amen. You want to talk about God giving new life? Just watch what happens in spring when the dead trees come back to life. That's not old coming back. That's the new, new that's resurrection at its finest. That shows that God is exactly who he says he is. And this is us saying, God, I trust that you are exactly who you say you are. I'm tired of hurting. I'm ready.

Dan: 12:52

Take it. And that's the key right there. I'm ready because family, God removes from our lives what you and I release. But he won't rip it from your closed hands. See, if you're still clinging that fear, that pride, that old identity, he'll wait. You know why? Because God isn't a thief. He's a healer, but healing begins. When humility opens the hand and says, I trust you more than I trust me.

Justin: 13:29

And I think a lot of times we fail to realize that what we're holding onto hurts more than letting go. Mm-hmm. It's just like there's that meme on Facebook with the rope and it's just a regular braided rope and you hold on and you squeeze tight and you think that that's the only thing keeping you up. When you fail to realize that there's a whole net of grace, God's beautiful grace that is waiting to catch you as soon as you let go. Look, it's not a tightrope walk. He's not asking you to climb a mountain. He's simply asking you to let him have it. And I know it's simple, but it's difficult. Absolutely. It's the gospel. It's such a simple thing. It's difficult, right? Confess with your mouth, believe with your heart. It's easy to say Jesus' Lord, hard to believe it in his heart. It's easy to say God will heal. It's hard to believe it in your heart. Because let's be honest, we're used to humans. That's let us down. We're used to people that said, I'm not gonna do that to you. I'm different. Only to see them do the same things that everybody else has done. Well, let me encourage you today, if you are listening, God is different.

Dan: 14:49

Mm-hmm.

Justin: 14:50

You know why they say God is good? Because to say he is great is to say that there is something else good. And let me tell you something, there is nothing that comes close to the goodness of God. Amen. He is that good that you can't even define him as great because that would mean to say that something else could come close to him and there is nothing like God. That's where true healing begins. And this is where it starts when we actually humbly ask him to remove it. Because here's the thing, when he removes it, he's gonna replace it. Absolutely. He's not gonna leave you that same broken shell of a man, but he wants to take you, break you, make you, and mold you into the image of Christ that he so desires. Like I said last week, that's where healing's found,

Dan: 15:34

man. You think about something, Justin, what a bold prayer. What a bold declaration to say, God, I trust you more than I trust me. Wow.'cause let's be honest, Justin, some of us, and I'm just, man, I may, maybe I'm just being too real today. You know, maybe Justin, maybe I'm just being too real today in this podcast. But you know, if we're honest, some of us would rather limp through life. Control, then walk with healing through surrender. I know that sounds brutal and I probably just offended somebody. But the honesty is control feels safe. It's familiar. Even when it hurts, it still gives you and I the illusion of power. But here's the truth. Control is a prison disguised as protection family. It keeps us moving. But the truth of it is you and I are never. Free. And step seven is the moment when we stop pretending we've got this. It's where we admit that we have reached the end of us. And that is not a failure family. That is the starting line of grace, Justin. And you know what?

Justin: 16:52

This is where we realize that the chains that we thought were holding us in place. It didn't even matter. No. That's where freedom comes. Freedom doesn't come when the chains are removed. Freedom comes when you realize those chains didn't even matter. Your past, who you were, the things you've done, those things that the enemy has used to tell you that you can't and you will never guess what? When you realize that to God, that never mattered in the first place, that's when you walk in freedom, because that's when you say God, take'em off.

Justin (2): 17:26

Amen.

Justin: 17:27

Take'em off and have your way with me. And what you'll see is those chains that you thought held, you are the same chains that he uses to whip the enemy in other people's lives.

Dan: 17:38

Man, you can't keep Justin. We can't keep asking God to fix what we're still explaining away. Yes. We can't keep praying for transformation while we are, while we keep defending the dysfunction in our lives. Healing doesn't come when you make excuses. It comes when you make space. And space is only made when you surrender this step. Step seven it's not about earning your healing. It's not about proving you're worthy. It's about trusting that God is. And the moment you stop striving is the moment he starts moving. You don't need a strategy family. You need a savior.

Justin: 18:29

And so often what will come to realize is at least I noticed in my life, so I struggled with codependency. It's here when I realize that I didn't need to lose codependency. I just needed to be dependent on Christ. Amen. I didn't want to give up. If I don't want to thirst for alcohol, I need to hunger and thirst for his righteousness. That's what this is. This is us saying, God, I no longer want. What was I want? What is and what is, is your goodness, your love, your mercy, your grace, your compassion. That is, we're getting ready to talk about. Is sufficient.

Dan: 19:13

Amen. And that's the thing we say that nasty word surrender. Justin, we talked about that a couple podcasts ago, but guys, surrender isn't giving up. It's giving over. That's right. You're not quitting. All you are doing at this point is you're transferring control. You're saying, God, this is yours now. The pain, the pride, the scars, the habits, the needs to be strong. I'm done trying to. Fix what? Only you can heal guys, that's not weakness, that's wisdom because the peace you're looking for, it's not on the other side of control. It's on the other side of surrender. Justin,

Justin: 19:59

the things that you are fighting, you were never meant to fight against the burdens you carry. Was never God's plans for you to carry. If you go back to the garden, it was a place of Eden. It was a place of peace. It was heaven on earth. That is what God had intended. But sin came into our lives and corrupted it, and now we feel, because the world tells us that you can't do it on your own, actually the world says you have to do it on your own. Right? The world tells you, just do it. Yolo. You only live once. Trust nobody but yourself. Right. I'm going back to old school. Drake,

Dan: 20:41

right? Right. Yolo. Yolo the world. I ain't heard that in forever, dude. It goes through my head.

Justin: 20:49

Sometimes I'm, but that's what the world wants us to think. Well, can I tell you something? You may only live once, but you have a chance to live eternally. You don't have to just do it. You can let it go and watch God do it and you don't have to go at it alone. You can trust him. You know why? I know I can trust God?'cause he's never failed,

Justin (2): 21:19

never.

Justin: 21:20

You know, people look at the Bible and they think, oh man, what is that? Really? I can't understand it. But if you read it, it's God's thoughts, his his in, it's his intentions. It's also him showing that time and time and time and time and time again. He is still the same God. He has never failed. It says his word will not go out void. Mm-hmm. Meaning it won't go out empty. If he said it, he meant it. And if he told you to humble yourselves and wait on him to lift you up and to cast all your cares and anxieties on him because he cares for you, guess what that means? You can wait on him and he will lift you up and you can cast it. I love what Dan said earlier. It's not too big. There's an ocean of grace. You're in a little tiny boat in the world. You're just floating in an ocean and you're drowning. Why not just throw some of that stuff into the ocean? Why not throw all of it into the ocean?

Dan: 22:24

Amen. Yeah. Paul, you know, you look at Paul, arguably the greatest apostle church planner. I mean, a powerful theologian in the New Testament. He says something so shocking in two Corinthians chapter 12. He admits Justin, that there was something in his life that Paul called a thorn, uh, in the flesh. And, uh, this, this thing tormented him. We don't know what that is. The Bible never said, uh, you know, maybe it's physical, maybe it's emotional, maybe it was spiritual, but we do know this. Paul wanted it gone. And not just once. Scripture says that he pleaded Justin with the Lord three times to take it away. When you look at that, this isn't some casual request. This was a gut level prayer desperation from a man who had already endured beatings, imprisonment, persecution, and he believed that God could remove it. But you know what God said? No. Instead, the answer Paul got was this, my grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in weakness. And right there, Paul hit the turning point that defines surrender family. Sometimes God removes the flaw, but sometimes he leaves it in place. It's not to punish you, but it's to reshape your identity. Why? Because God knew something that Paul didn't, that Thorn would keep him humble, that Thorn would strip him of pride, that thorn would anchor him in grace, and it would reveal God's strength through his weakness. Not in spite of it. See family that thorn didn't stop Paul's calling. You know what it did? It refined it. In Paul's response, Justin, I love this. This is radical. He says, therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness so that Christ's power may rest on me. You see, only grace can make someone say, I'm glad I'm weak, because it's in the weakness. God shows up in ways that strength never invited. See families. Sometimes the removal isn't the miracle. Sometimes the miracle is who you become in the letting go. You don't need the pain to disappear. To experience, freedom, family, what you need is for grace to meet you in the path and reshape who you are because of it. The miracle isn't always a clean slate sometimes. Justin, it's a stronger soul,

Justin: 25:38

and so that's what I think people need to understand too. When we get here. Sometimes you have to wait on the Lord because he's doing something in your life. That nobody else can. And we want to outrun God, right? We want, we try, we try, we, we wanna outrun him. Um, and we're terrible at it. We're very terrible at it. Well, and I used this story this last Sunday, so I, I, we have an older lawnmower and it kept dying on me. So I thought, well, I'm gonna put a new battery in it. And we put a battery in it, and Penny, she said, well, let's pray about it for a second. I said, okay. So we prayed. I went out there, hopped on a lawnmower, started it up, new battery, at least if it died, I didn't have to jump it. Started it up, took off, throttled all the way up, went down, boom, it died, started right back up, took off, went down, died. We had prayed, and in that moment I felt, God say, slow down. So I was driving it and instead I had it throttled all the way up. I kicked the throttle a little bit back. It never died. You see, the problem was. I had it throttled so high that I was outrunning the blades that was trying to cut the grass. And that's the problem. We throttle so hard in our recovery that we fail to let God remove those shortcomings when he wants to cut the grass. Very good. And that's when we have to say, okay, here are my weaknesses. I love what you said, what Paul said. Here are my weaknesses, God. I'm this, I'm this, I know I'm this, I know I'm this, and I will boast in that because if I'm willing to boast in that, he's willing to show up in that. But when I try to hide it and keep it, he can't because I'm still trying to be my own. I'm still trying to have my own strength in it, but in my weakness, he's made strong. What are you failing to let go of? What do you feel like you need to be strong in today that you keep struggling with? Let go for real, because that is when freedom is found. When we finally come to that place of surrender, I love what you said it, it's not a feeling, it's a posture. Mm-hmm. It's a posture of surrender and out of that posture, all good things flow.

Dan: 28:08

But the question we've gotta ask ourself, Justin, is what are we still managing instead of releasing? We gotta get honest for a second. This is where you're gonna have to get honest. You've named the flaw, you've prayed about the pattern. Maybe, maybe you've even fasted, maybe you've journaled, maybe you've cried, you know, cried it out on the altar, but deep down inside, you're still managing it. Instead of truly releasing it, ask yourself, what is that one thing? That I keep handing to God, but pulling it back when things start to feel uncomfortable. What part of my story am I trying to control, justify or hide? Hoping he heals it without exposing it. But here's the truth, Justin. God isn't confused about your brokenness. He's just waiting for you to stop negotiating the terms of your surrender. You see so many of us say, God, take this, but not that fix me, but don't touch that relationship. God, heal me, but don't make me forgive them. Use me God, but don't ask me to give that up family. That's not surrender. You know what that is, Justin? That's spiritual bargaining.

Justin: 29:46

And you know what? I love what you said. And it goes back to the beginning. What we try and control ends up controlling us. I'm gonna get my anxiety under control today. Says the person who's struggling with anxiety. Mm-hmm. I'm gonna, I'm gonna get my anger under control today is the person who's running around angry.

Justin (2): 30:06

But

Justin: 30:08

we can't bargain with God. No. We can't say God, I want you to take, like you said, we can't say God, I want you to take my anger, but I'm angry now, so I'm gonna hold onto it. God, I want you to take my anxiety, but man, this kind of worries me a little bit. So you just, you just take that part of it, and I don't know about you, but I, I've seen it at the altar. People get and they go and they bring these things before God and they lay'em at the feet, and I believe wholeheartedly they mean to. But it's almost like before they get up, they're just putting it in their back pocket, like God doesn't notice. And then they go home and they wonder, why am I still struggling?

Justin (2): 30:45

Right.

Justin: 30:47

Because he told you to lay it down. He called you to lay it down. And that's why I believe at the root of most of our problems is the pride. Oh, absolutely. We don't want to let it go because oftentimes that's the only thing we feel like we can control, but we're only a slave to two things, sin and righteousness.

Justin (2): 31:15

Amen.

Justin: 31:17

That's what my Bible says. You see, Satan doesn't come with the chain and say, here's drug addiction. Here's alcoholism here. Take take, take a broken marriage. You know what? You're gonna have struggle with this and we'll just put this chain on you, and you just walk it out for the rest of your life. No, little by little, he gives you one link and says, do you want this one? And what happens is we'll take the chain off and then take that link right back from Satan and go, yeah, that's a good one. And we imprison ourselves thinking that we're controlling it. Until we're the ones chained up

Dan: 31:52

guys, God doesn't work through bargaining. He just take it from me. Let me save you a lot of heartache. God doesn't work through bargaining. He works through brokenness. I'm gonna offer you an invitation right now in your car, in your kitchen, on your walk, however you're listening to this podcast right now. I want you to say it out loud, God, I give you whatever that is, God I give you, even if you don't fix it the way I want it, even if I never fully understand it. Even if you leave that thorn in that place, you can have it all of it, because real healing doesn't start when the pain goes away. It starts when the control does see, letting go for real is the moment heaven gets invited into your mess. You see family, God isn't afraid of what you're carrying. He's not waiting for you to clean it up. He's waiting for you to hand it over raw, broken, tangled, and all. And in that moment when surrender is real and humility is honest, family heaven shows up not just with answers, but with presence. Peace. Power because what God touches, he transforms, but only what you're willing to release. Justin, as we get ready to wrap this podcast up, man, again, this is something we could probably talk about for a real long time, but what you want to close with man,

Justin: 33:50

do not conform to the patterns of this world. Be transformed by the renewing of your mind. In order for us to stop conforming to the patterns of this world, we need to humble ourselves and ask God to fix us. That's where transforming begins. I love what you said. Healing doesn't begin when the pain's gone. It happens while the pain's still there. Sometimes guys, there's gonna be a thorn in your side, I promise you. Continue to give it to God and he will continue to give you the strength to overcome it. And what you will see is that thorn, that the enemy meant to buffet you is what I think the Bible says. Keep you down. Mm-hmm. God uses to elevate you. He elevates himself through it. Amen. But it takes us humbly coming to him. Amen. And saying, God, you take it. It's not asking, it's saying, God, take it.

Dan: 35:04

Guys. That's surrender. That's the type of surrender that shifts the atmosphere. That's the kind of prayer that God answers. Not with a maybe, but with mercy. So don't hold it another day. Release it. Give it to God, cast it on him. Don't pick it back up. Till next time, family stay rooted, stay recovered, and let's get to work.

35:35

You are not just surviving. You are becoming, becoming rooted in truth, becoming recovered by grace, and becoming the person God always knew you could be. Thanks for joining us on Rooted in Recovered. If this episode stirred something in you, don't keep it to yourself. Share it, live it, let it take root. We'll see you next time right here where scars become testimonies and hope rises from the ashes.