Your Calm Parenting Path

38. When My Calm Slipped (And How I’m Coming Back)

• Nina Visic • Episode 38

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In this episode, Nina shares something vulnerable and real: she’s noticed she hasn’t been as calm as she was mid last year. Over the school holidays, her mindfulness practice slowly slipped, and she felt the impact - more frustration, more reactivity, and less patience. Nina shares what’s been happening behind the scenes, and what she’s gently putting back in place to help her come back to calm.

 

 

You’ll Learn

  • How calm can fade through a “slow drift” (without noticing at first)
  • Why capacity matters (work, tiredness, kids getting older)
  • Why this isn’t failure - it’s feedback
  • What Nina is doing to rebuild her foundation: a morning anchor, an evening reset, and micro-pauses

 

Why This Episode Matters

When your calm slips, it’s easy to think you’re failing - but calm isn’t something we achieve once. It’s something we come back to, again and again. This episode is your reminder that you’re human, and you can return gently.

 

One Small Shift

Try Nina’s 3-minute morning anchor: three minutes before checking your phone - even imperfectly — to reconnect and steady yourself.

 

Take The Next Step

If you’re thinking “I know what to do, but I can’t stick with it,” you can book a free 30-minute clarity call to talk about what’s been happening for you and whether coaching feels like the right next step. 

 

Links And Useful Resources

 

Let’s connect


About The Host

Nina is a mindful parenting coach and mum who helps overwhelmed parents move from reactive and stressed to calm, confident, and connected - with tools that fit real life.

 

In this episode, Nina shares her personal experience of noticing her calm slipping, what was underneath it, and how she’s rebuilding her regulation foundation gently - without the pressure of perfection.

 

She believes calm isn’t a personality trait - it’s a practice that can be returned to, again and again.

 

This transcript has been copied and pasted but not proofread or edited, so it may contain errors or inaccuracies.

You're listening to Your Calm Parenting Path. I’m your host, Nina, a mindful parenting coach and mum, here to help you go from overwhelmed and reactive to calm, confident, and connected with your kids.

 

This show is for parents who want to raise their children with more patience, less stress, and a whole lot more joy. Because small shifts make a big impact—and you can build the parenting life you’ve always wanted.

 

If you want to see what I’m up to, follow me on Instagram at [your handle]. And don’t forget to hit follow or subscribe so you never miss an episode.

 

Now, let’s get started!


 

Hi, welcome back.

Today’s episode feels a little vulnerable.

Because I want to talk about something I’ve noticed recently… and that is that I haven’t been as calm as I was towards the middle of last year.

And instead of pretending that I’ve got it all together, I want to share what’s really been happening.

Because if you’re in a season where you feel like you’re slipping… you’re not alone.

And this is what it looks like to gently come back.


Over the school holidays, something shifted.

The lazy mornings.
 The boys climbing into my bed.
 The later nights.
 The feeling of “we’re on holiday, it’s fine.”

And slowly — without me really noticing at first — my regular mindfulness practice slipped away.

I wasn’t doing my morning practice.
 I wasn’t sitting at night.
 I was tired after big days.
 I told myself I’d do it tomorrow.

Now, I still had mindful moments during the day.
 I paused.
 I took a breath.
 I reminded myself, “this isn’t an emergency.”

But the consistency?
 The deeper regulation?
 That daily anchoring practice?

It wasn’t there.

And I’ve noticed the difference.


I’ve been more frustrated.

Snappier.

Less patient in those sibling arguments that seem to go on forever.

More reactive when the noise gets loud.

More likely to jump in quickly instead of pausing.

Not wildly out of control.
 Not yelling constantly.

But definitely not the grounded, spacious version of myself that I was last year.

And here’s the important part…

This isn’t because mindful parenting “doesn’t work.”

It’s because I stopped doing the foundational thing that supports it.


When I sat with it honestly, there are a few things contributing.

Work has grown.

Some beautiful opportunities have come my way — opportunities I’m so grateful for.

But with growth comes more responsibility.
 More thinking.
 More holding space.
 More output.

I’ve also started running again.

Which I love.
 It makes me feel strong and clear-headed.

But it also means I’m more physically tired.
 I have to wake up earlier.
 My muscles are sore.
 My body is working harder.

And then there’s the boys getting older.

They’re busier.
 Louder.
 More opinionated.
 More complex.

The problems aren’t toddler tantrums anymore.

They’re emotional negotiations.
 Big reactions.
 Big personalities.

And all of that requires capacity.

So when my practices slip… and my capacity is stretched… it makes sense that my calm feels thinner.

This isn’t failure.

It’s feedback.


I used to think being a calm mum meant staying regulated no matter what.

Never snapping.
 Never losing patience.
 Always responding perfectly.

But calm isn’t a personality trait.

It’s a practice.

And practices need tending.

The moment we stop tending to them, life slowly takes over.

Not dramatically.
 Just gradually.

And that’s what I’ve experienced.


So here’s what I’m doing — not in a dramatic “new year, new me” way.

Just gently.

1. Morning Anchor

I’m not going back to 20 minutes.

I’m committing to 3 minutes.

Before I look at my phone.
 Before the boys fully wake up.
 Even if they’re in my bed.
 Even if it’s imperfect.

Three minutes is enough to reconnect.

2. Evening Reset

Not a full meditation.

Just three deep breaths.

And one reflection:

What are 10 things I’m grateful for today?

It shifts my nervous system before sleep.

3. Running + Rest Balance

If I run, I don’t push myself to be ultra productive that day.

I acknowledge I’ll be more tired.

I go to bed earlier.

I work with my body instead of against it.

4. More Micro-Pauses

Hand on heart.
 Long exhale.
 Step into another room for 60 seconds.

Not because I’m failing.

But because I’m recalibrating.

Part 6 – How I’m Handling Hard Moments Right Now

So now that I’ve noticed all of this, here’s an example of how I handled a tricky moment recently.

The other day, the noise was escalating.

Two boys arguing.
 One shouting across the house.

And I felt that familiar surge.

The tightening in my chest.
 The heat rising.

Instead of snapping straight away, I said:

“I need 30 seconds.”

And I walked into the laundry.

I breathed.
 I let my shoulders drop.
 I reminded myself — they’re not attacking me. They’re having a hard moment.

Then I went back.

It wasn’t perfect.
 I was still firm.
 I was still tired.

But it was better.

And sometimes better is enough.

And here’s what matters…

That moment didn’t happen because I’m magically calm.

It happened because I’ve built the foundation before.

Even when the practice slips, the wiring is still there.

That foundation is everything.


If your mindfulness practice has slipped…

If you’ve been more reactive lately…

If you’re thinking, “I was doing so well and now I’m not”…

You’re not broken.

You’re human.

Life changes.
 Capacity shifts.
 Seasons get fuller.

The work isn’t about never slipping.

It’s about noticing sooner.
 Returning sooner.
 Being kinder in the process.

Calm isn’t something we achieve once.

It’s something we come back to.

Again.
 And again.
 And again.

And that returning?

That’s the practice.


And if you’re listening to this thinking…

“I know this makes sense. But I can’t seem to stick with it on my own.”

I want to gently say something important.

Knowing what to do is not the same as being able to do it consistently.

Most mums I work with already know they should pause.

They know breathing helps.
 They know yelling doesn’t work.

But they’re tired.
 They’re stretched.
 They’re carrying so much mental load.

And trying to rebuild regulation alone is hard.

That’s exactly why I offer one-on-one coaching.

Not because you’re failing.

But because change happens faster, deeper and more sustainably when you’re supported.

In 1:1 coaching, we look at:

  • Your specific triggers
  • The moments you lose it
  • The patterns playing out in your home
  • The stress sitting underneath it all

And we build simple, realistic regulation practices around your actual life.

Not an ideal version of motherhood.

Your real mornings.
 Your real evenings.
 Your real nervous system.

You don’t have to wait until you’re yelling every day.

You don’t have to hit rock bottom.

If this episode felt uncomfortably familiar… that might be your sign.

You can book a free 30-minute clarity call with me.
 We’ll talk about what’s been happening for you.
 And we’ll see if coaching feels like the right next step.

You don’t have to do this alone.

And you don’t have to figure it out perfectly before asking for support.

Sometimes coming back to calm isn’t about trying harder.

It’s about being held while you rebuild.

We begin again.

Always.

 

 

Before we wrap up today, I just want to say this.

If you’re listening to this episode while folding washing, or driving to school pick-up, or hiding in the pantry for five minutes of quiet…

You are doing a really good job.

Even when you’re tired.
 Even when you snap.
 Even when your practice slips.

The fact that you care enough to reflect — to listen to something like this — tells me so much about the kind of parent you are.

Calm isn’t about perfection.

It’s about coming back.

And you’re here.
 Which means you’re already coming back.

I’ll see you in the next episode.

 

 

Thanks for listening to Your Calm Parenting Path! I’m so glad you’re here, and I hope this episode gave you something useful to take into your parenting journey.

 

If you’d like to dive deeper, sign up for my mailing list at mindfulparentinglifestyle.com.au for more tips and insights, or book a free chat to learn how we can work together. And don’t forget to hit follow or subscribe so you never miss an episode.

I look forward to speaking with you next time on Your Calm Parenting Path.