Burn-Break&Become Unstoppable B3u

What will you choose today?

• Bree Charles

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This reflection asks “What will you choose today?” and offers compassionate practices for navigating heavy seasons—naming pain directly, slowing anxiety, quieting spiraling thoughts, and refusing to let depression have the last word. It speaks honestly about addiction, grief, and abusive relationships, emphasizing accountability, rituals of remembrance, and boundaries that affirm self-worth. Through candid lessons, caregiver structures, and gentle practices of rest, movement, and asking for help, it shows how strength grows even in aftermath. Above all, it delivers a clear message of hope: when suicidal thoughts arise, reaching out ensures you don’t face the weight alone.

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SPEAKER_00:

Good morning, everyone. Good morning. Good morning. Welcome back. I'm so honored and blessed to be amongst you guys again today. I woke up this morning. I thought to myself, what will I choose? What will I choose? So, what will you choose on today? I know what I chose. I want to see what you're going to choose. Okay, from those of us who suffer from depression, anxiety, addiction, grievance, um, loss of a child, loss of a spouse, loss of a parent, sibling, a best friend. What will you choose today? Maybe you made a bad decision. Are you in an abusive relationship? Are you sick today? What are you feeling? Are you angry? Are you angry maybe because someone hurt you and you're not able to forgive them and move forward? What are you feeling today? What are your feelings? What are your thoughts when you woke and when your eyes, you opened your eyes? What did you feel today? Are you exhausted, maybe? Are you exhausted from your everyday life of taking care of the children, paying your bills, keeping a roof over your head? Feels like you're working harder than you and getting paid less than what you're worth. Are you laying in bed just with that exhausted feeling? Like, I just don't feel like this today. Where are you at, people? Well, let me tell you, I have a challenge for you. This is my challenge to you on this day. Okay, if you woke up with any of those feelings, maybe you just are numb. Maybe you don't feel anything and you just don't feel like getting out of bed. I'm gonna challenge you today. I'm gonna challenge you. And I challenge myself. Everything that I tell you guys, I do it myself. So let's do this together. Let's challenge each other, let's hold each other accountable. Okay? First, I want to say if you're under uh care of a doctor, um taking medications for depression, anxiety, whatever, of course, follow your instructions of your of your um from your doctor. But I also want you to take control. Be in power. Be in power. I always say be in control. Remember, control versus our fears and choices, choices versus our fears, and how we're gonna be in control. We must be in control, okay? That is the number one source of our strength, being in control. Yes, we can take medications, we can follow doctors' orders, but we can also have that secondary power to say, you know, I'm gonna help fight this, I'm gonna beat this. This is what I challenge you. I want you to speak things, speak to these things that are ailing us. Speak to those things, put them in their place, you know? Kind of how, like, when somebody comes at you and they're just talking out of pocket or whatever, and you have to put them in their place, or you have to talk to your child or whoever, and you have to say, hey, stay in a child's place. Well, put these things in their place, and that's beneath us. Beneath us. Speak to depression. Tell that depression, today I choose today that I'm not going to feel this way. I refuse. Speak to that depression. Let that depression know that you will not win. You will not sit there and continue to be in your own head. Get out of your own head. Speak to that depression and say, You are defeated. That anxiety, speak to that anxiety. Tell that anxiety right now. I will not let my thoughts overwhelm me. I will not let my fears overwhelm me. I will not let my thoughts continue to race and be out of control. I want you to stop and cease right now. Get beneath me. Speak to it. Addiction. Tell that addiction, you will not take control of me today. I'm I will reach out and get the help and seek help from wherever I need to go to get it. Maybe I feel like using something today. I'm gonna reach out to someone who will help me, who will talk me into a different path, a diff, a different direction. Speak to that addiction. Tell it to get behind me, beneath me is where it belongs. Under our foot, walk on it, stand tall, stand in power, knowing that you are in control. I'm going to choose to not to not let this overpower and take me. Grievance, okay. Let me tell you something about grievance, people. Speak to your grievance and tell yourself. Tell yourself and know and stand strong and then say, time. Time. Time is going to heal all of my troubles, all of my wounds. Just, I'm just going to take time. I'm going to sit and I'm not going to do anything but take my time to cry. I'm going to take my time to heal. I'm going to take my time to remember those that that the person that you have lost. I'm going to take my time today and I'm going to think about all the good things that they have shared, all the good things that they have done, all the good things. Take that time to sit in that moment and embrace that spiritual hug. Take the time. Take the time to remember the things that they said to you that will put a smile on your face, maybe even bring a tear to your eye. But take that time. Know that there is no time on grievance. There is no time, but time heals all wounds. Not saying that it'll just go away one day and you're gonna forget. You're not gonna forget. There's always times that I sit now and think about my grandmother. What I remember is the love that she shared, the love that she had, the cooking that she did. And those things that she taught me, I take them with me to this day. And I hold on to them. And every year, every year, every Thanksgiving, I will make her sweet potato pies. My whole family, they love it. Okay? They love it. And that's how I continue to kick the time. It's been since my my grandmother, I believe she passed in 98, uh, 98, 97. But it still hurts. But what I take with her is everything that she taught me. I take, I speak to her every day. When I'm in that kitchen, I take her with me. I have a picture of her right with me. So, people, it just takes time. The pain never goes away. I miss her, I miss her dearly. But I use everything that she taught me, and she is who made me what I am today. So I challenge you to take those things of that loved one and make it give you strength to move forward and to become better. Okay? Did you make a bad decision? Tell that bad decision that you made, like, hey, this won't be the first, this is not the first, and it won't be the last. But don't let that bad decision make it so you cannot get up. We may waver, we may stumble, we may even fall, but just know you you can get back up. You can get back up. That bad decision that you made, it's okay. Don't cry over. I tell you, I get a lot of sayings from my my grandmother, okay? A lot of sayings from those of uh of my my uh people for uh family members that were very wise from the past. What don't cry over spilt milk. It's spilt, don't cry over spilt milk. You just okay, wipe it up, okay? Start again. It's a bad decision, okay? If you're in an abusive relationship, okay. I've been there. I've been there. Okay. But you know what? I would think to myself sometimes, like, oh my gosh, you know, I look back and it's like, oh, why did I stay in that abusive marriage so long? 17 years. I should have been gone in seven seconds. But you know what? I used to feel like I wasted a lot of my youth. I wasted a lot of my years, a lot of my time. And it's abusive to, but you know what? That abusive relationship also, again, is a part of me. See, all of these things that we go through, these challenges in our life, they are building blocks to who we are. Okay. I've been there. I've been there, but I say to myself that if I would have never been in that relationship, I wouldn't know how to live and be strong, stronger than what I was then. And I have five beautiful, amazing children. I have five beautiful children. I take that positive out of it and I say, you know what? If I could go back, you ever ask yourself if you could go back, what would you change? What would you change, you know? And then you say, if you change anything, well, I wouldn't have the five kids that I have. You know, I wouldn't want to change the dynamics of that because they're so beautiful. Beautiful, smart, funny. I wouldn't want to miss that, but I would take a little bit and I would change a little bit to say to myself, and I would stand up and say, Hey, I'm better than this. I deserve better. We have to take charge. People are only going to treat you how you allow them. If you decide, if you're in that relationship and you're just sitting there and you're not doing anything and you keep making excuses, oh he just, he or she, he or she, I say, again, he or she, we make excuses. Oh, they love me. Maybe they just had a bad day, or maybe I caused them to to do these things to me. No, you didn't. You don't cause people to hurt you. You cause people to love you. What you put out, you should be getting back. And if you're not getting that, okay. Look at yourself in the mirror. I want you to do that first. Look at yourself in the mirror. You tell yourself, when you look at yourself, tell yourself, what do I deserve? Is this what I want? Is this what I want? Nobody, nobody, people, nobody can tell you how to do, what to do, and when to do it. You have to wait until you get tired. And when you look at yourself, because your girlfriends, your your male friends, they can all, oh girl, or you need to leave him, or you need to do X, Y, and Z. No. No. Nobody, you, only you know when it's time to move forward. Or if it's time to stand still. You have to know that. That's within you to learn and choose when to move. But take control and take power, tell your spouse, your significant other, or whatever which you demand and what you deserve. Okay? Nobody else can tell you anything about your marriage, your relationship, or anything but you. Take control of that situation. Are you angry? The angry, the anger that you you feel from someone hurting you and you're not able to forgive them, let me tell you, it's wasted time. And again, yes, you're gonna be hurt for a while because maybe you trusted that person. Maybe you trusted that person with everything. Ride or die, and they betrayed you. Some of us have loyalty beyond measures, and I'm one of them. My loyalty is unwavering, unwavering. I go to the end and I mean that. Have I been hurt? Numerously, numerously. It took me a while to know that we are exactly what we are. We are human beings. And when we look at people as what they are, then we will understand that human beings are not perfect. They are not perfect. We are not perfect. You are always going to get somebody to do something that may not suit your heart or your feelings. But guess what? Okay? You're either going to let that anger and that hurt consume you, and you're gonna continue to be bitter, and you're gonna continue to just waddle in that and never move forward, or you're gonna say, you know what? I'm gonna go ahead and forgive this person and I'm gonna move forward. But notice I said the the listen to the words that I say, forgive. I Brie never told you to forget. Brie never said to forget. You can forgive, but you don't never forget. You don't forget because you don't want that same thing to be repeated. You can go to that person and say, I forgive you, I forgive you, but I won't forget, and you won't get another chance. Sometimes people get chance after chance after chance to hurt you until you again have to look at yourself and say, No more. No more. Never again will you hurt me. I gave you your chance. I still love you, but you will not hurt me again. I will be there for you in a way that I see necessary, but you will never get that close to hurting me again. Forgive that person. Forgive that person, move forward, but you don't have to forget. With your everyday struggle, okay, of life, okay. People you have, I've been there. Again, I say nothing came to me easy. Single parent, mother of five, okay, in the military. I got tired. I got beyond tired paying bills, okay? But we have to remember that if you don't place your feet and get them planted in that solid ground, okay, and put that first brick, lay that first brick, that second brick, that third brick, okay, until we build the house that we want to live in. You have to build, you have to get first your foundation. You have to get to that uh, okay, let's talk about taking care of the children. Time flies. I remember my babies when they were babies. My children are now in their 30s. My youngest is 25 in a blink of an eye. You have to continue to say that how they say trouble don't last always, trials don't last, tribulations don't last always. They don't, people. You have to continue. Don't give up on your children. Don't give up. This is why so many people, so many young people are running out here rampant because the parents just say, I can't do no more. I'm tired. I give up. And that's why they're out here stealing cars, robbing people, killing, just senseless. Because the parents gave up because they can't do no more. If you go back to the old school way and grab that child and do not give up, continue to speak positive into your child. Because before you know it, 18 years will come quickly. You look there, they're here, they're they're they're eight minutes old, they're eight days old, they're eight years old, they're 18 years old. And you know, once they get 18, you still have to guide and direct. You still have to guide and direct. So know that your time is precious and your time is limited. Don't get tired. Take a break. Take a break. We've got to remember to take that break. Take that break, saying, okay. Find a way. Okay, okay, children. You know what? This is a time. Set a time. Okay, from from you go to work every day from nine to five, don't you? You go to work from nine to five every day. And when five o'clock is over, your phone better not ring, right? Same thing with your children. This from this time to this time, it's gonna be mother and children or father and children, because we got single parents, single fathers out here. My son was one of them. Okay, and I speak the same thing to him. Okay? Take that time out. And then when you're done and you have that parent-to-child time, then it's your time. This is when you take the time to sit back and do whatever the crap it is you want to do. You take that time, you breathe, and you say, This is my time. I'm gonna take this time to get myself together. It's all about me. Don't nobody bother me. Maybe you talk to who you want to talk to, or you don't talk to anybody. You watch your favorite show, you drink your favorite beer, your glass of wine, whatever you want to do, you take that time for you because if you don't, it's going to crash. If you could get up every day and go out there and work for the man, why can you not take time for yourself? I have seen people, I see people that work every day, maybe six days a week, maybe even seven days a week, and they don't take the time. Where do you work and you don't get the time to take a vacation? Oh, I can't because I gotta work, or I can't because they need me. Let me tell you something. These multi-million dollar companies, you know, they're they worked hard, they're taking their time, they're taking their vacations, they're taking theirs. If you don't take yours, something else is gonna take your time. Okay, and I doubt that's where you want to be. Don't be in your youth and work so hard and so much to where you don't take care of yourself. Take some time for you. Take that time. Find a way to make the time to take the time. I challenge you, people. I'm challenging you. If you're sick in your body today, okay, I want you to tell that sickness, you're not gonna beat me. You're not, I'm yeah, you will be defeated. I'm going to move forward this morning, even though I have these aches and pains. I'm going to try to move. I'm going to try to just do a little something that's better than doing nothing at all. Even if it's mental sickness, if it's mental sickness, shut it down. Shut yourself down. Don't think about nothing. Hum. You know, do something. I challenge you people to fight. Fight for what's what's worth to you, and that's your life. Today I choose to fight. I choose to not let any of the things that bother me, any of the thoughts from my past consume me. Any of the people that have hurt me, I'm not going to let them consume. Anything I refuse, I refuse to let something else be my cushion. My peace of mind, my closeness with God. That is my choice. My fears will not consume me. Today, I'm going to make the best of this day. I'm going to make the best of it. Okay. For I tell you, people, I just had a good friend. I had to tell, I had to tell. Remember, I don't speak nothing that I've never been through. I was 41 years old, 41, and I had a full stroke. And I'm telling you, that woke me up. You don't have to show me or tell me no more, God, to know that life is precious. And if you guys are not looking around you today, life is precious. You better live and enjoy every moment of it. Every moment. And if you are suffering from suicide, okay, let me tell you something. We're going to have to talk about, I'm going to do a video on suicide all by itself. But if you're suffering from suicide, reach out. Reach out. Reach out to me. If you can't talk to those around you, reach out to someone you can. Mental health, behavioral health, whoever it is. Don't sit and you're in your sorrow. Don't sit and let your mind wander. Don't sit and let your thoughts spiral out of control. Reach out, call a hotline, call someone. Tell that that suicidal affliction, that that that feeling that you have to be still. Be still for a moment. Talk to somebody who can make sense when you can't. You can't make sense right now. You're not making sense. Get out of your own head. Put your thoughts to the heart. Reach out to somebody. I challenge you today, people. I'm challenging challenging you today to get it right. Let's live life. Thank you for joining me today, and I'll see you again real soon.