Military Infertility Support & Mental Health: The Story Behind Mindful Warrior Alliance

Supporting Military Families Through Infertility and Mental Health Challenges

Mindful Warrior Alliance is a nonprofit organization providing free mental health counseling and IVF financial support to military members, veterans, and their spouses. Whether you’re active duty, reserve, National Guard, or a veteran, our mission is to ensure no military family faces infertility or mental health struggles alone.

We offer:

• Six free therapy sessions with licensed mental health professionals trained in military and infertility care
• Quarterly IVF scholarships to help offset the high costs of fertility treatments
• Nationwide and international support for those stationed or deployed around the world

💻 Learn more and apply at mindfulwarrioralliance.org
📲 Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @mindfulwarrioralliance
⭐️ Help others find us—leave a review and share our mission

Join us in breaking the silence around infertility and mental health in the military community.

Transcript

Hi , I'm Kerri Bicskei, military spouse, licensed therapist, and founder of Mindful Warrior Alliance. Welcome to the Mindful Warrior Alliance Podcast, your go-to space for real conversations around mental health IVF, fertility and military life. Each week we connect with leading experts, service members, male spouses, and thought leaders to bring you tools, insights, and stories to support your journey.

Whether you're navigating deployment, fertility treatments, or just trying to stay grounded, you're in the right place.  

 Hello everyone. Welcome back to another episode of the Mindful Warrior Alliance podcast. I am your host, Carrie Bikay, military spouse, president and founder of Mindful Warrior Alliance. And for this episode, I just wanted to kind of dive into. Our personal connection to Mindful Warrior Alliance and kind of where Mindful Warrior Alliance came from As far as, uh, inspiration to start it, I'm gonna talk a little bit about my own personal IVF journey, uh, issues with TRICARE mental health, uh, building the nonprofit.

And let you guys in on, you know, what we offer a little bit more in depth. So just wanted to give a little brief synopsis of where we came from, how we started, and what we offer, and get really clear on that. So yeah, just wanted to start with, you know. Austin in my own really personal IVF journey, that's where non, you know, my Warrior Alliance was born out of our, you know, our own personal IVF journey and journey with infertility and just the frustrations and the emotional and mental and financial toll that that has taken on us as a couple and our family.

. You know, we've had some, some really hard days, you know, struggling with infertility.  We struggled with un unexplained infertility for, for years, um, for four and a half years before starting our first IVF round.  Went through numerous, you know, surgeries and doctors and naturopaths and diet and lifestyle changes and like all the things and everything would always come back normal.

, we'd just have. Nobody be able to point to us, uh, and, and say what the clear answer was. I think, which is like one of the most frustrating things with unexplained fertility. You just want an answer so badly and no one can give you that answer. , which is really, really hard. Um, I do have an endometriosis diagnosis, um, which you know, means that.

It does make it a little bit harder to get pregnant, but I've had a hysteroscopy and laparoscopy two surgeries that help kind of clear out, um, you know, some of the polyps and fibroids that come with endometriosis. So after that's done, you're supposedly, you know, having a better chance of getting pregnant.

But we, you know, after that's done, we still had no success with getting pregnant. So started, um, to think about IVF and researching clinics and doing all the. All the things, um, to try to get our, you know, our, our head wrapped around doing a process like this. And anyone that knows Austin and myself, we're very holistic.

Uh, you know, people. And we really don't like to take medication unless we don't have to. We like to eat, you know, organic whole foods and, uh, you know, we're just really mindful about what we put in our bodies. So IVF was obviously really. Not the, the first thing that we wanted to do. Right? Um, and aren't we so great that, aren't we so grateful that that's an option for us?

But we, we really just were super resistant to, to doing it? And is this the right decision for us, I think with, which is what a lot of folks can really struggle with. But at the end of the day, you know, we really wanted a baby and, um, you know, really wanted to put our best foot forward and, and so. IVF was gonna be the best option for us.

So there were days when we would go back and forth like, is this the right thing? Is it not? Um, you know, and I spent days and hours, hours and days I. In weeks and months looking for IVF scholarships, anything to kind of help support us financially, any grants that were available for military families, um, and really came up short, right?

So it was like super frustrating,  that there's just no support and that Tricare. You know, didn't cover any, anything IVF related, um, and even procedures and labs and, and things that should be covered, um, you know, ended up being such a hassle. It's like pulling teeth, trying to work with TRICARE to get things that should be covered.

Covered, right. It's just, it's such a battle. Um, so super frustrating. Um, you know, as we were going through our IVF journey, um, you know, deciding on a clinic was really important for us and we did a lot of research and settled on CNY fertility clinic because they're the most, um, reputable and affordable and we just really liked their transparency and everything that, um, you know, there.

Reproductive endocrinologists had to say and their nurses had to say when we did our consults. Um, so it was really helpful to kind of have that clarity and feel like you're, you know, really well supported, um, in making that decision. 'cause it's, it, yeah, it's really important to have someone that's in your corner and we really felt like the folks at CNY were just, just.

As awesome as could be. Right. Um, so that was, that was helpful for us. Um, you know, we had so much of that frustration with not having that support, um, financially from TRICARE and, you know, as we were kind of looking for the scholarships and looking for any sort of financial resources to help us, we just kept saying to ourselves, Austin and I, like, there have to be other couples out there who are struggling with this.

Like, this is wild that, you know. That the military doesn't help us in any way. Um, you know, and Tricare stance on IVF is, you know, if there's a service related injury that you can attach, um, you know, a diagnosis with that, they will, they will help with with IVF, right? But, um, that's, that's not many people's stories.

That's not many people's cases definitely wasn't ours. Um, and so hence no, no help, no support. So we knew we really wanted to help support couples with that financial piece and take, you know, lighten that load a little bit. Um, you know, and I kind of floated the idea to Austin, like, we just need to start our own nonprofit.

Like, how cool would this be to like, help someone else, um, you know, and be that I. Support that, that we're not finding right now. Right. Um, and then the other piece of that is the whole mental health piece where you're going through the struggle of IVF and infertility and it's you, you're already a military family and isolated and don't have your community around and you know, many cases.

And that mental health piece is. It's big. It's, it's so big. A lot of, a lot of people don't talk about the struggles of infertility and going through IVF and you, you know, you don't wanna burden your friends and family and, um, make that like you're, you're focused even though you are kind of hyper-focused on that.

And every, every month that you don't get pregnant, like it's. Tears and sadness and frustration and all the things. Um, but you know, so you obviously need someone to, to really talk to a designated point person, a therapist. Um, but there's a lot of resistance with that from. You know, mill spouses and from mill members because you don't want that diagnosis following you around everywhere.

You don't want that fear of, um, you know, having a flagged psych record or having a spouse that has a flagged psych record. Not being able to be, you know, promoted or to fly or to have your sec, you know, your security clearance is somehow impacted. Like there's a lot of resistance to. Uh, accessing mental health care, right?

You think that, oh, I'm just gonna use my Tricare benefits and access mental healthcare. Well, first of all, you know, there you have that barrier of trying to find someone, um, who's, who's a good fit for you, and do they have a wait list and all the things. And then, um, all of those, those barriers that we mentioned before of when you're using your insurance.

This is something that a lot of people don't know. When you're using your insurance, your information is not confidential. Like your. Provider, your therapist has to provide your information, your diagnosis to the insurance company in order for them to get reimbursed. And the truth of it is insurance companies are so, uh, diligent about the information that they're trying to collect.

They're, it's super invasive. All the information that they, that they need, um, they fight providers right and left. It's like. A whole thing in and of itself with Tricare therapists trying to get reimbursed from TRICARE and going back and forth that it's, I, I mean, I know therapists that it's taken years to get pennies reimbursed from, from tricare.

It's a nightmare. So you wonder why no one takes tricare, that's why. Um, so definitely like some policy issues there as far as mental health coverage and, you know, better reimbursement rates for therapists. And like, it's, it's kind of a whole gamut, but one of the main barriers that folks don't access.

Mental health resources is because of that stigma and because of all the, all the things that I kind of mentioned. So Austin and I were just talking, we're like, gosh, wouldn't it be awesome if we were able to have a nonprofit that also offered, you know, mental health support and was truly barrier free, truly confidential.

Um, and, you know, infertility focus, 'cause this is such a, an important niche. Um, you know, subset of folks who don't. Feel supported, right. Um, so yeah, it was kind of a two part idea that we started playing around with. And so the birth of my four year Alliance came from our own, you know, frustrations with not having those, those resources and those supports.

So that's why we, we started my four year alliance, you know. Um, so we wanted to build something, um, for people who were going through that experience, just, just as we were. 'cause that emotional toll, that mental toll, that financial toll, like, it's, it's real, you know, it's, it's a lot. So, um, you know, mindful Warrior Alliance.

Is, yeah, it just holds such a special place in my heart because we were going through our, our first cycle, our first round, and that was something, you know, building the nonprofit was something that kept me really distracted and, and happy and engaged and, and hopeful, you know? Um. So, yeah, I'm just so excited and so proud of like what we've built here.

Um, you know, I have my private practice, which I am super proud of as well and keeps me busy. But the nonprofit is like another layer, a really truly another level of, um, just, just a source of pride for me. And, you know, just, it really fills my cup and makes me feel. Super fulfilled. So, you know, as an Air Force spouse and psychotherapist and former professional athlete, um, you know, I, this is one of the things that I'm just most proud of is, is starting this nonprofit.

Um, you know, so I wanna talk a little bit about. What our nonprofit does, like the specifics of the services that we offer, right? So we really strive to take that emotional weight, the financial burden, the Tricare battles, like all the things. Um, we want to take those barriers away from folks and hopefully, you know, help people feel less burnt out and anxious and emotionally exhausted.

Um. You know, with, with all of those things, right? Um, and so with the mental health piece of our program, we offer six free mental health counseling sessions with, uh, licensed therapists. And beyond those six sessions, if you are a client and you're wanting to continue with therapy past those six sessions, then it is between you and your therapist to decide on a sliding scale rate.

Um, it's a pay what you can rate that ranges from $30 to $80. It's really depending on your therapist's experience, it's depending on your, what you are able to pay. Um, so our therapists are really willing to work with you and sign an agreement and they. Are, they know that it's, you know, that is the case.

It's a sliding scale case. So we have amazing therapists who we're so grateful to be contracted with, um, you know, from many different states. Um, you know, we have fully licensed therapists. Who have their independent licenses. We have provisionally licensed therapists who are working toward their licensure hours.

And then we have our intern therapists. So we're contracted with, um, I believe six different universities. So we have interns from those clinical counseling programs and master in social work programs, and we supervise those interns. Um. Um, you know, we, we provide, um, you know, great supervision for them and they have, uh, a ton of resources as far as their onboarding goes.

Um, and are trained in perinatal mental health, military mental health and fertility, um, counseling, and the gold standard treatments that, that go with that. And so, um, yeah, our interns are super well qualified and we're just really proud of the, um. Yeah, the breadth of therapists that we're able to provide for, for our clients.

So we do have a $49 application fee for clients coming into our program, so that qualifies them to apply for our quarterly financial I. Scholarship, which is $5,000. Um, it's just awarded to a couple per per quarter. Um, so that $49 allows you to apply for that, and it also allows you access to those six free mental health counseling sessions.

So. That $49 goes right back into our organization, allows us to be able to, um, you know, pay for those HIPAA compliant, uh, platforms that we use to connect our therapists with our clients to keep all your information confidential. Um, I. All of our platforms that, that we used to connect with our fertility clinics and bases and our partners.

Um, and then also that that money goes back into the scholarships that we, you know, directly, um, provide to, to our clients. Right. Um, so that's a little bit about the, how those sessions work. Um, and then anyone is able to access. Those sessions as far as your military rank and status, you know, so whether you're active duty guard, reserve veteran, any branch of service, if you're a male spouse, um, you know, you're enlisted or your officer, you're able to access those things.

No questions asked. Were really, um. Low barrier in terms of what we ask you to provide. Um, so no IRS documentation, income verification, any of that kind of stuff. Um, we just ask you to fill out our application with what your fertility expenses are. Um. You know, your, your rank, your, your income, but we're not, um, you know, super invasive in terms of asking for all of that information because we know you're going through it and the last thing you need is another person, you know, asking for your, all of your personal information.

And it's, it's a, it's a lot. I totally get that burnout. And so we wanna just be as low barrier as. As possible. Right. Um, so no diagnosis is required. We don't report your info to anyone. Your privacy is 100% protected. Um, and sessions are completely confidential. Unless you tell us that you wanna hurt yourself or someone else, your information stays with us.

Um, we have a built-in network of our. 40, you know, 40 plus therapists now that are licensed all across 50 states. Plus we support, you know, deployed members and those who are PCs abroad. Um, so we're able to, to offer services to, to clients outside the us which is huge. Um, we also partner with fertility clinics, military bases, um, you know, family advocacy programs, military life, family counselors, pots, uh, and universities across the country.

So. Um, just a little bit about, um, who's in our organizations. Um, so you're assured that we have, you know, we have trained licensed therapists who are, you know, just a console away, um, to help you. We have an amazing program coordinator. Her name is Jessica Sanchez. She's phenomenal. She's. Super type A and very organized.

She's like my dream girl and she makes this organization go round. She's so wonderful. Um, and she'll take care of you every step of the way from the time you fill out your application to setting you up with, uh, onboarding, connecting you with your therapist. She's there for any questions that you have along the way.

She's wonderful. We also have an amazing part-time grant writer. His name is Andrew. He's wonderful. Um, is responsible for bringing in money for our organization. So we love Andrew, we love Jessica. We have a fantastic board of, you know, Katie Franz, Anna ler, Kelly Audio and Austin bge, um, who are wonderful and supportive and.

You know, uh, yeah. And we're just so grateful to have the people that we, that we have surrounded, um, you know, and in contributing to our, to our team. So that's a little bit about kind of how we started, how we got here, what we offer. I'm sure I've left something out. But if any of you guys have any questions about any of our services, um, you know, feel free to reach out to Jessica.

You can reach her at connect@mindfulwarrioralliance.org. Or you can reach out to me, carrie@mindfulwarrioralliance.org. Definitely check out the website, mindful warrior alliance.org. We're on Instagram. In Facebook, we're gonna have a TikTok really soon against my better judgment. But we wanna be able to connect with you guys, um, you know, however we can.

So if you know someone who could benefit from this support and this resource, uh, you know, please reach out. My four airlines.org. Shoot us a DM or a Facebook, Facebook message. Make sure to follow the podcast and share this episode and just share our mission so that we can continue to create a space for healing, hope, and connection within the military and infertility community.

Thank you guys so much for listening and hanging in there, and we are here for you. And. Don't feel like you can't reach out. Um, yeah, we have so many ways for you to reach out, so thank you so much for listening, and we'll see you on the next episode.



  📍 Thanks so much for joining us on the Mindful Warrior Alliance Podcast. If today's episode spoke to you in some way, share it with your friend and leave us a review. It helps us to reach more warriors like you. Don't forget to follow us on social media and head to mindful warrior alliance.org to connect with our community access resources and stay up to date on what's coming up next.

Until next time, take care of your mind. Stay strong and be mindful.