How our energy affects and reflects in our dogs!

In this episode, Chrissy and Cara explore how our emotional energy impacts our dogs and household dynamics. Chrissy shares how her stress as a busy mom can create chaos, affecting both her children and pets, while Cara describes the calm, grounding energy in her home with a new baby and dog. Through personal stories, they highlight the importance of self-awareness, presence, and practical grounding techniques—like mindful breathing and relaxed walks—to foster harmony at home. Their conversation encourages listeners to be intentional with their energy, benefiting both family members and pets.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:01

Thank you. Welcome to Dog Is Love. Hi. We are thrilled to have you. Welcome back. Today, we're diving into our all-time favorite topic. Yes, we are. Although you'll find out that Kara and I have many favorite topics. This one's, this one, it's right up there at the top though. Yeah. This one is energy and how our energy affects and reflects in our dogs. And of course, every aspect of our lives. Yes, sure does. Absolutely. All right. First, let's just take a beat. Let's take a deep breath in and hold it for four and let it out, a deep breath out and hold it for four. All right, let's do that one more time. All right, now let's take a moment and just think how we move through our days. What's our energy behind your daily intentions, right? What is the energy in your home? Do you wake up calm and enjoy the morning hours or do you wake up already feeling behind the ball? Do you rush through your morning routine because you don't have time like you used to? Yeah. Or do you intentionally spend it welcoming in the day, in the moment, sharing the energy and love for your dog and family before you head out into the world? I'm laughing because it sounds so lovely. It sounds lovely. Heaven. Oh, my gosh. Let's also think about the way we interact with our dogs on a daily basis. And what is their energy like? Oh, that's a lot, right? To think about. But it's good. Yeah. And there's a method to your madness with the breathing today. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. So tell us about your life now. Oh, my God. What's your life like? All right. Mine's... Currently jam-packed from the sun up to the sun down. Are you ushering? Are you enjoying the mornings with your family? No. I am definitely in survival mode. Yeah, okay. And worse, I am not putting, what do they say, the oxygen mask on my mouth first. No, no, no. Right. Oh, my gosh. I have to say, though, I would probably bet most of our listeners... are feeling the same. Of course. I think I try to best to like have a cozy home. Sure. A calm household and mindset. I think it's important because we always have dogs at our house. Right. Of course. But I do have nine-year-old twins who are tech loving, Lego making, sports going. Sure. Boys. And You know, the pack of dogs on the regular, running the company, my home, covering for sick walkers. Oh, we just had to do that this week, right, Kares? Uh-huh. Trying to grow our business and community, doing the school drop-offs and pickups because that's important to me as a mom. Of course. Because I had a working mom and so I want to be able to like be there with the boys when they're done school.

UNKNOWN 4:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 4:18

And it's filled up with like big energy, right? All day. Yeah. The moral of the story is your life is jam packed, busy, busy, busy. And I think that that's a really relatable feeling. Yeah. I don't think I'm unique in any way. Yeah. Yeah. But you are unique. Don't say that. You're unique. But I just, the situation is, is I think probably most of our listeners are going check, check, check. Yeah. Yeah. sometimes I think though like you know is it a lack of organizational my part I mean because sometimes it's you know who has times to organize or I don't know people who have maybe a lot of help with their families which is amazing you know I mean I think if you have that but no dude it's like life is hard life is hard it's hard I always think I need more commitment because God I love sleep And if I could just get up like an hour earlier, but I love morning sleeping. Oh,

SPEAKER_00 5:23

God.

SPEAKER_01 5:24

Yeah. I hear you. I hear you. I also think life is comically unrelenting. Yes. Yes, it sure is. Yes, it sure is. Yes. It's like a fire drill sometimes. One thing after another, after another, after another. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. And our dogs...

SPEAKER_00 5:40

Pick up on that. I

SPEAKER_01 5:41

know.

SPEAKER_00 5:42

Yes, they sure do. Maybe

SPEAKER_01 5:44

somebody that's listening could like teach us a new trick about this and not being in survival mode. Oh, God. Yeah. Call us. Send us an email. If you've got the tip, send it. We'll take it. You always kind of say that this is just a season, Chris. Give yourself some grace. You remind me often to do that. Yeah. Well, of course, we have to all give ourselves a little bit of grace because we're just human and we're just figuring it out. But at the same time, it's also you can just lean into the fact that it is comically unrelenting. And, you know, what are you going to do? What are you going to what are you going to do? But it brings us back to the episode today. Yeah. Right. Because we're talking about energy. And what happens to us when our lives are comically unrelenting and how that affects not only our households, but our dogs. Yeah. All right. Let me tell you, I've got one for you. Okay. Let's hear it. All right. This is like a momzilla moment. Okay. Okay. I love that. Okay. So I was coming home from work and the boys were on their, obviously their tech and they have a time limit in our household. And I think they were well past the time. Okay. Right. And I just expected that they would be off of it when I got home. Right. And we have a bay window so I could see in. And we had boots at our house. Love them. Who comes from a household that's very calm. Yeah. Super chill. Older kids away from college. The owner is just like a very grounded woman. Lovely, quiet home. Yeah. Routine. Routine for sure. And so- When I looked through the bay window, everybody was like calm. Chilling. The dog was on the couch with the boys. They're obsessed with each other. Yeah. And I was on fire on the inside. Oh, when you saw the boys on their devices. Yeah. Even though it was like. a beautiful scene in there of everybody being calm. So I opened the door and I'm like, what are you guys doing? I can look at you. Look at your body right now. And I'm like, and I'm going like crazy stomping around. Yeah. You know, I told you to be off of the, you know, tech by the time I got home. I'm, you know, throwing my stuff down. They are then now meeting my energy. And they're like, what? Mom, come on! You know, and it's just like this chaos of insanity going on. Way to go, Christy. I know. And then in that chaos, I realized like I looked down and Boots is like nipping at my arm. He's like, yeah, yeah. All of a sudden starting to bark. And this is a this is a dog who was chilling, chilling on the couch. Totally fine. The boys are like throwing their iPad down, marching around the house like you are always the boss. Like, you know, just screaming at me and stuff. And that energy is. Continued for a while. I can feel it right now in my body. I can feel it. And that energy continued until like I kind of was snapped out by boots being naughty. Yeah. And I'm like, what? What are you doing? Stop. And I'm like yelling at him to stop. But then I realized, oh, it was me the whole time. Yeah. So. What's the lesson? I was in an awareness at that point. I finally got into awareness. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 9:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:15

So I did the box breathing, which we just did in the beginning of the episode here. Yep. The method to your madness. Yep. And I just brought it down. Yeah. And then finally the boys started to come down. And then we got back into our routine, back into the flow of our household. And then we just kind of kept on going through the night. So did you have to remove yourself from that situation? Did you like once you became aware of, oh, dear, you know, this was me. You know what I mean? Like I did this. I stirred this pot. So did you had to remove yourself and sort of check it? Are you kidding me? Yes. Yeah. So thanks. Thanks, Boots. Yeah. Thanks for that. Right. Thanks, Boots. And if I would have brought my energy in differently, like, hey, guys, you know, I You know, I was hoping you would be off your iPads by this time. Right. You know, you guys know the rules. You know the responsibility of yourself. Let's go. Right. You know, it would have probably have set us off on a different track. Sure. Sure. But I'm human. Human. And this happens. Exactly. Exactly. All right. What's going on in your world? Are you Mama Zilla? I I'm I'm not. At the moment, we're in a different season. Oh, I remember this time. So I just had a baby about six, almost six months ago. And so a lot of our day, it's just so, you know, when my husband and my stepson on the night he's with us, you know, when they are out of the house, it's just me, the baby and the dog. So it's a real chill time. vibe right in the house it's a grounding season I think that we're in right now so um and you have a chill vibe yourself I yeah I'm pretty easy going I'm pretty easy I'm pretty chill until I'm not and then I'm not but again we're human um but yeah I mean I would say that I would say the vibe in our house is especially when it's just the three of us in the house it's you know we got our routine you know we've got we get our morning coffee going and then we get the morning bottle going. And it's just, we've already, Junie's already been out. She's been fed. She's, you know, she's ready to chill. So it's, it is this sort of really grounding season. And actually it's really neat because Kelly is at the age where he's really starting to figure out Juniper. Yeah. Like seeing her. Yeah. He can see her now. And he, I guess you could always see her, but She's really coming into focus, quite literally coming into focus. And he is fascinated by her. And babies and dogs are energetic creatures just by nature because they don't have. I mean, what do I know? I'm not a scientist, but they don't have the the loop that adults have going on in their mind about, you know, whatever thing that's going on in your world. And I got to do this. I got to do that. They don't have that. Right. And so the other day he was having his bottle and she came. She was on the back of the couch and they made eye contact and they had this like really special little moment where he stopped drinking and he started to smile at her. And then she came down off of the back of the couch onto the couch beside us. And she just sat there beside us. And he put his hand on her face. And then she went over and she licked his little face. And he giggled, you know. And it was really beautiful. And I don't know if it's just like the first time mom and me, but I was just, and the hormones just overflowing. But there was, you know, I just kept thinking to myself, Man, it would be so nice if we could all be a little bit more like this. Totally present, totally grounded, and totally in the moment, which is hard for us. It's hard for human beings to be that way. I mean, we just have the loop in our head. Yeah. Non-stop. For our listeners, it's not like Junie is... older, lab, super chill. Like she has energy. She's super playful and stuff. It's just she was meeting the energy of the household at that moment. Yes. And she... To be fair, like in the moments where, when our big kiddo is home, when he, you know, my 14 year old stepson, if he's home, he loves to play with her and she meets him there at that too. And they will go and they will, she will get riled up. But in this moment, it was not that. You know, she was meeting this like really gentle and calm and cool and a teaching moment for me. It was a reminder that, This is the vibe. Yeah. This is the vibe. Right. You want to that I want to try to carry for sure through the day and through my life, even in moments that are hard moments. What do you guys think? Do you think she can she can keep it? I think you can. I think it's just about being intentional. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's sort of I mean, that's like the that's that's the that's what we're talking about today. It's all about awareness. Yeah. Right. All right. So here's the thing. Dogs read body language. So they literally read the energy of the room, its people, you and Kelly, other animals.

SPEAKER_02 15:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:14

And then they reflect that energy back.

SPEAKER_02 15:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:18

Also really cool is that dogs like us contain structures in their brain that That allow them to process facial expressions.

SPEAKER_00 15:28

Oh, yeah. That's so cool.

SPEAKER_01 15:29

So they're so attuned to us. And being attuned, the dogs in our lives are constantly giving us feedback about the energy levels we're putting off. And with their help, I think we can become better. Better humans. I like what you did there. How cool is that? It is. It's very cool. It's very cool. And it's not something that I think a lot of people are aware of. More so now because I think this sort of dialogue happens. Yeah, we're hearing it more. Yeah, you're hearing it more in like the self-help space. You know, you hear a lot about energy. And it was never something that I was really all that aware of until I started this. reading some books in my 20s, you know, and being like, am I the problem? Yeah. You know, and they put it all joking aside. It may not be something that some of our listeners are even really aware of. It's cool to be attuned to it. Yeah. So the energy of your dog is an overall reflection of the energy in your life and your home. Yeah. At a period of time. Yeah. So as long as we have dogs, which you're saying is so cool in our lives, those dogs are acting like a big old mirror.

SPEAKER_00 16:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:52

Which is the, you know, what we basically saw in our two examples. Yes. Of like me versus you right now.

SPEAKER_00 16:58

Yes. Totally.

SPEAKER_01 16:59

So in other words, if we're calm and we take the time to be present. Yes. Then they're calm. Yeah. Right. Right. And. your dogs will show the symptoms of your calm energy. And the reverse can be the same. You know, if you see if you're noticing a lot of naughty behavior, that's also a moment to pause. Yeah. So don't if. Yeah, exactly. So before you get upset at your dog or you start blaming them for the unwanted behaviors. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Look at it from a new perspective. Look at it as like an invitation. Yes. Yes, absolutely. So the first step to improving any situation is to get crystal clear where you already are. And so I think when you're looking at energy, right, I think the first thing is awareness. Like Boots kind of gave me that opportunity to be like, oh, hey, I Totally. You're not your normal self. What's going on? And you could have, you could have in that situation, scolded him and gotten angry with him or tried to correct him and been like, when you were getting annoyed, but you had the wherewithal to, in that moment, snap yourself back to the present. Yeah. Which is what dogs do because dogs are so present. Correct. Right? Yeah. So dogs are constantly in the present moment. So in that moment, specific instance he snapped you into like your visceral state of being like okay I'm acting like a lunatic like what am I doing yeah yeah yeah they're like little warning lights for us yeah like that warning lights mm-hmm okay okay so let's let's then focus on the questions for the dogs right like what's going on so does your dog you know rush doors and go ahead of you

SPEAKER_02 18:53

or

SPEAKER_01 18:54

will they sit and wait and Right. Is it difficult for your dog to stay in a calm mindset? Are they like constantly running ahead of you, chasing anything that crosses your path?

SPEAKER_02 19:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 19:08

Barking at strangers. Oh, my God. Or passing, you know, dogs, which happen. We see that all the time. Dog walking. Totally. Totally. Or they like calm on the leash and they're trotting by. We see that a lot all the time, too, which is really cool. And actually, I have a question for you, Chrissy. So like. In that instance, like when you say that, when you're asking, like, does your dog like rush the door? Does your dog do that? Like, is it is it across the board with all dogs? Are you going to find different sorts of behaviors and different? Like, it's this is not like a blanket. This is not. So you got to kind of get attuned as just as much as your dogs attuned to you. I think you got to start paying attention. Right. and seeing how your dog reacts to different things totally if your dog responds to a big energy of another dog one dog could bark at that dog another dog could kind of circle around you and get on the other side of you and kind of do like a hiding in a way you know and put the two to put more space between that dog and yours. So you really have to kind of also learn how your dog- Their reaction? Yeah, like how they're gonna react to different energies too. So it's not also being aware of yourself, it's being aware of them. Okay, I like that. So if dogs do naturally pick up on the emotional energy that we're putting out, whether it's joy, excitement- anxiety, sadness, anger, anything like that. What are some things that the listener can do? I think we're going to go back to the box breathing. Okay. Put that into your routine. So again, it's really cool. You breathe in, you hold for four, and then you let that breath out for four. Yeah. It's really cool because if you think about it, it's like a built-in meditation app for free. Yeah, I love it. I mean, God gave it to you. You might as well use it, right? Right. And then I think like another thing is, is like if it's just you or if it's you and you have a family, I think the best thing is go for a dog walk. Like go for a walk. Yes. Be direct. Yeah. And be out in nature. Yes. And, you know, help your dog like feel... safe with you because the more you're grounded, the more you're calm, they will likely follow your lead. Yeah. I love that. Going for a walk. Number one, we've talked about this before drains the energy of the dog from a physical manner. Yes. Uh-huh. And at the same time, the like hitting of the payment. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Is grounding for the dog. Mm-hmm. And then that energy kind of feeds up into you as the human. Yeah. And then you get automatically grounded. Dude, I am following. Yes. Now you're kind of in this cycle. A flow. A flow between you and them. And then it would be cool, too, if, you know, if you have roommates or your family, like if you're all kind of going out there and doing it, you know. Right. So to the listener that has three kids.

UNKNOWN 22:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:36

A dog that. Is reactive. To the energy of the children. That sort of thing. Like if you can. And you have the capacity to. What Chrissy's saying. Is basically say. Stop. Pause. If you notice that things are getting really hot. Right. And go out for a walk. Redirect. Shift that energy. Move it. Yeah. Move it. Yeah. Get it outside. Pound it. You know. Put it back into the earth. That kind of. And then. The thing Cara too. Is when you do that. Yeah. The dog. Yeah. Okay. Got it. Got it. Yes. Okay. Okay. And then when you are like, that's why it's so soothing to pet a dog, because not only is it the process of soothing and like of petting the motion going back and forth. Sure. But you're also receiving from them the energy that they borrowed from the earth. You're now receiving them into your body. Right.

UNKNOWN 23:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:52

So that's why the walk is so important. We always go back to the walk, don't I? Yeah, of course. And this might sound like, all of this could seem, it might sound a little woo-woo. Come over to the woo-woo side because it's actually working. Yeah, I was like, but it really does, even if you just put all the energy, all this talk that we're saying aside, the actual physical walk is, And the petting, like all of that is really, truly relaxing. It does put you in a more stable mindset. It does. And puts you in that present mindset, too, that we talked about. Yes. Yeah. So when we're out in that walk, right? Yeah. You're not going to just snap and you're in it. Right. You're going to have to kind of go through a process with your dog. Right. Because you might need to reevaluate some things that we're going to be talking that we've already talked about in our walk. But we're also going to learn further down the line in this podcast. OK. You know, sometimes we see it out. Like if you're out on a walk and you're, you know, talk. Oh, talking to your dog and stuff like that. You know what? It's more of not like what we're saying to the dog. It's more about like- The physicality. Yeah, our posture, right? Yeah. So instead, notice when you're walking, if your arms are at a 90 degree angle, like let them go. Relax. Yeah. If your shoulders are up to your ears, like bring them back down. Totally. Okay. And all of that shift is then that, again- Going back to that being that pack leader, that's going to shift you into that position and that energy is going to also relay over to your dog. What about the leash? Yeah. So with the leash, sometimes we can get a little tense out in the big world. And you notice that you might be holding the leash with two hands or you might jumble up the leash into one hand and you're holding it really tight. Yeah. Especially if your dog's reacted to another dog. And so you're squeezing it on a harder. So, you know, make sure that I you're talking about this and my shoulders are going up. Yeah. Like I'm like, I can like feel the tension. Yeah. So remember when you're out for the walk, like. You know, I like just to take that six foot loop. I mean, six foot leash and just loop it in one big old like lasso and then just dangle it in the palm of your hands. Okay. Got it. Or you can wear like a day pack, a fanny pack and attach it to you. Yeah. And then you can be hands free. Yeah. So that then the energy of your grounding is just going straight to the dog. I love that. Just reshifting. Yeah. the leash in your hand to be more relaxed, shoulders down and arms straight. And just be on a walk like the dog's not even there. And then, you know, that energy is going to flow. And this is, it's important to note that this might not come as naturally to some people, right? Like this, this could, this is practice. This takes practice. It takes practice to get that way. to get that comfortable too, I think for a lot of folks. I know, okay, I will not put, I want to project that onto our listeners, but I know for me personally, it took a long time for me to learn how to do that. To do the walk. Yeah. And I mean, obviously as a dog walker for over a decade, I learned how to do it, but there are still days and I can, I know we could come up with dozens of stories from all of our walkers who are exceptional walkers, right? Yeah. They have bad days where their energy is off. Yes. For whatever situational thing that happened. And then that in turn spins up the whole pack. Right. Yes. So like if we have an anxious or chaotic energy or if we're like having unresolved stress from the morning. Totally. The first thing that we always ask our dog walkers like, hey, what's going on with you? Yeah. You OK? Yeah. Something happened. Yeah. Because or like, hey. How about we take a beat right now together? You know, let's just kind of get you back on track. So we go back to that box breathing or we kind of hash it out together. We talk it out. You release it just so they can release it. And then they get back into our schedule because, you know, it's important for me. Right. To make sure my my team is out there totally in a healthy mindset because things can go awry with the with the pack.

SPEAKER_00 28:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:34

But. Listen, I've been doing this for a long time. I mean, I just walked this past week with 20 dogs, like 10 at a time. Dude, my pack was off because I was anxious for the day because I had so many dogs and it went awry too. So it's not only going to be like you learning with the dog when you're first in this, it happens to all of us. So just know it's a practice and it's ongoing. And even people that are vets at doing this, also have to take that pause, take that shift. That's why, and I'm going to digress for one quick second, but that's also why I love yoga because it's sort of similar into that way. It's a practice, right? You may have some days where you're like, oh, I am in the flow. I am in this groove. I am getting these poses. And then some days you fall over doing a tree pose, right? Because you're just like, so your mind is spinning, right? So it's kind of like, but then when you can find the flow or even just bring awareness to the body, you're in the present. Yeah. Just like the dogs. Yeah. You're in the present. Right? Yeah. I love it. I love it. So our goal here is to be present. Yeah. Like yoga and our dogs teach us to do. Totally. Totally. And we've said it a couple of times already, and be in awareness. Yes. And one of the most magical qualities of our dogs is their capacity to be in the present moment, like we've said. Right, right. Yeah. That's what we struggle with as humans. We do. But that's okay. Yeah. So instead of letting our thoughts swirl in our brains, instead of, you know, Stressing over the coulda, shoulda, wouldas or the things that are in the future that we know we have to do, our to-do list, right? As much as we can, if we can find a way to be present and grounded in the moment, then that is going to change our whole vibe. And that's going to reflect not only in our dogs, but it's going to help us in our households with our coworkers. You know? Yeah. Yeah. Right. Wait, this is so funny because right now I'm not grounded because I'm getting so excited like that. We're like kind of like I like I'm so excited for the listener to like become aware. Oh, my God. I have like so many things in my head that I want to just spit out, but we're not going to do that. But my energy is so like. because my mind is running because I'm getting so excited for this. Okay. Okay. I'm settling myself back down, guys. Right. And how are you going to do that, Chrissy? Take a breath. I think I'm going to take a breath. Yeah. I don't have a dog right now to go for a walk, but I'm going to take a breath. Yes. Yes. So, you know, if you have learned anything from listening to us today, the moral of the story is dogs are... are going to be your greatest teacher to your emotional and visceral state. And so if you allow that, if you allow them to be that big old mirror that you said, you can bring yourself back to the present moment.

SPEAKER_02 31:59

You

SPEAKER_01 31:59

can bring yourself into a more calm, stable mindset And that will in turn sort of deepen the relationship with your dog because that's who you want to be for your dog. Correct. That's the leader that you want to be for your dog. So if you can find ways, even if it's just snippets through the day, even if it's just moments through the day, that's good. That's great. Those are the grounding moments that you want to strive for. And the more you have those moments, like we always say, like with the training, like layering on top Totally. It's compounding together and together. And then like then you'll just get into that flow with your family and your dogs. Yes. And it will change. It will it will change your life. I mean, let's see. That seems like a big, bold statement. But, you know, those little those little micro movements, you know, can can really change. Help you be more dog, right? They can help you be more in the moment, more present, more present with your children, more present with your spouse or your partner. It can be a really positive impact. So we talk about this today because we want you guys to really experience what Kara and I get to experience on a daily basis in our team by being so grounded with our dogs. Now, we don't have that, like I said, nailed down. We're not doing that. Oh, God. Yeah. We're not experts at this by any means. No. But we want you to feel that with your dog. Yes. Yes. Yeah. So, guys, go.

UNKNOWN 33:46

Go.

SPEAKER_01 33:47

Go try it out. Right. Yeah. Go check in. Yeah. Bring the awareness. Think about just think about it to think. OK. Oh, yeah. I've never really noticed. But when I'm you know, if I get if my team scores a touchdown and I get all riled up because I'm psyched about it, my dog jumps off the couch and starts barking at the television. That's energy. Yeah. Right. Yeah. And it's the same if I, you know, get into it. Get an email that I find unsettling and all of a sudden my body language changes because I'm stressed out about it. And then you notice your dog starts to pace. That's energy. Yeah. So those little things. And the minute you can be aware of it, that's all you need to do is be in awareness of it. Because the minute that you're in awareness, then you're automatically in the present. And if you can be in the present, then you can meet the moment and make the change. Girl.

UNKNOWN 34:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 34:50

Love our dogs. What would we do without them? I love them too. They're exceptional teachers. All right. Until we see you next time. Yay. Dog is love. Thank you. Thank you. We would be so grateful. Dog is Love is created and hosted by Chrissy Waltman and Cara Kelly in partnership with K9to5. Our show is produced by Tony Kelly at Baltimore Podcast Space. Our original theme song was written and recorded by our very own Cara Kelly.

SPEAKER_00 35:56

We could pretend That we have the answers Or we could lean into the light Cause man complicates The stillness of

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nature While dogs humbly watch with awe

SPEAKER_00 36:30

in their eyes We're not supposed to struggle alone A friend for

SPEAKER_01 36:50

a lifetime To guide you wherever you roam Dog is love Like the roots of the trees and the stars up above Dog is love Judgment free unconditionally