Healing After Pornography Betrayal: A Catholic Therapist’s Guide to Trauma, Prayer, and Recovery

What happens when the person you trusted most becomes the source of your deepest pain?

In this sacred and raw episode, Amber walks Catholic women through the earliest days of betrayal—especially after discovering a husband’s pornography use—with tenderness, clarity, and deep spiritual wisdom. Drawing on psychology, trauma theory, and Catholic theology, this episode is not about fixing your marriage overnight. It's about tending to your heart, your body, your faith—and reclaiming your dignity.

You’ll learn why betrayal trauma is a real clinical and spiritual condition, how Eucharistic adoration can begin to rewire your sense of safety, how EMDR and somatic work restore the nervous system, and how journaling and the Psalms can become lifelines of honest prayer.

Saint Monica, Saint Rita, and countless Catholic women are your companions in this journey—not as quiet martyrs, but as strong, discerning women of faith.

This episode will meet you right where you are—and remind you:
You’re not too broken. You’re beloved. And this is just the beginning of something sacred.

Key Takeaways

• Betrayal trauma is not emotional weakness—it’s a real, whole-body response to the rupture of trust in an attachment bond.
  (Steffens & Means, 2009; CCC 364)
• You’re not “too much” for reacting strongly. You are responding exactly the way God designed your body to respond when something isn’t safe.
  (Porges, 2011; CCC 2333)
• Eucharistic adoration helps reestablish trust—not just spiritually, but physiologically. Your body heals in the presence of Christ, even if your heart is broken.
  (Psalm 13:1; CCC 1324)
• EMDR and somatic therapy aren’t secular substitutes for grace—they’re tools to prepare the body to receive grace again without shutting down.
  (Shapiro, 2018; CCC 364)
• Prayer journaling is a form of prayer even when your words are angry, confused, or numb. You don’t have to sound holy to be heard.
  (Psalm 10:1; CCC 2559)
• Saint Monica and Saint Rita were not passive—they were discerning, courageous, and boundary-honoring women. Holiness does not mean tolerating sin.
  (CCC 2383; CCC 1640)
• Healing is not linear—it moves in spirals, shaped by presence and grace. And even if your marriage isn’t restored, your wholeness can be.
  (Psalm 34:18; CCC 2337)

Resources + References

• Steffens, B., & Means, M. (2009). Your Sexually Addicted Spouse: How Partners Can Cope and Heal. New Harbinger Publications.
• Porges, S. W. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, Self-Regulation. Norton.
• Shapiro, F. (2018). Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) Therapy: Basic Principles, Protocols, and Procedures.
• Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC): 364, 1640, 2333, 2337, 2383, 2559
• Scripture: Psa

Disclaimer:
This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional counseling, spiritual direction, or medical advice. While I’m a licensed Catholic therapist, I am not your therapist—and listening to this podcast does not create a therapeutic relationship.If you’re experiencing significant distress, please reach out to a licensed mental health provider in your area, your parish priest, or a trusted support resource. If you're in crisis, contact 988 or your local emergency services.The Catholic Counseling Institute exists to support women with resources that integrate faith and psychological insight. We’re here to walk with you, but we are not a crisis line or emergency care provider.